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E-mail: mylordwon@yahoo.com
Gender: Female
Location: USA
Occupation: ~Screenwriter~ * ~Speaker~
Age: 45
Member Since: June 3, 2004
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hi hope you can help me i'm a 15 year old male i'm a devout christian i love god with all my heart and i wanna be a better christian and devote my life to god i want to help people to get closer to god i wantto start to spread god's word i'm a bit nervous not sure where to start but i want to start talkinhg to people about god maybe start with people that i know not sure how do i go about it? (link)
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God bless you! The Way of the Master is a great technique for witnessing. Check it out here:
http://www.wayofthemaster.com/watchwitnessing.shtml
God will opens door for you...Mark 16:15
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I raped someone I want to turn myself in immediately. Tell me what I need to do. I need to be punished. I will not say how it happen and why. I can't make up any excuses. I was drunk but it doesn't change anything. The person who was hurt doesn't want to do anything and prefers to just forget and move on, but I can't . I need to be punished and I want to turn myself in. The person wouldn't have to worry about trial or publicity. I just need to know what I have to prepare for. (link)
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You have already victimized this person once. If you turn yourself in, it will become a public event and you'll victimize this person again. You're right, you should be punished...living with what you have done will be a punishment.
But what you need to do is ask forgiveness from the victim and from God. Eventually you will feel that forgiveness.
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will god forgive me and will I still go to heaven when I follow through with what I'm about to do. I figure if I'm going to loose everything I'm going to loose it on my terms. I am going to jail for driving under suspennsion and I,m on disability and I'll loose everything I'm already living my life in a wheelchair from a motorcycle accident. I already have my mind made up (link)
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Your concern about whether God will forgive you, tells me that you know that what you are about to do would not please Him. God's forgiveness is not a license to sin. He loves you with an everlasting love and sees your heart. He wants you to trust him with your circumstances.
This is God's promise for you...Jeremiah 29:11 says, "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
Seek Him wholeheartedly and believe God's words.
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Earlier this year one of my guy friends had a bad breakup with his girlfriend and she started dating one of his friends. He turned emo and started cutting himself. He became atheist and more reserved. He had so much hatred to his ex-girlfriend(my friend)and his friend(also my friend)I helped him through it and got him to stop cutting, become Christian, and become more comfortable with people and also to forgive them both and he is now friends with both of them again. He is a completely changed person now. But he seems to have a bit of an obsession with me.He asked me out but I sadly rejected him because I felt nothing for him. I only did the things I did because he was my friend and I hated seeing him that way. He now has a new girlfriend but he acts like he doesn't like her. He says things about her that he think is weird and awkward. He flirts ALOT when we talk over facebook but the thing is I feel extremely guilty. I feel like im making him cheat. Ruining his relationship. Ive told him countless times that I only want us to be friends but he acts like he forgets that. He says im flirting with him when im just joking around with him. He says "I love you" but I try to take it in a friendly way because he says it to all of his lady friends in a brother-siter kind of way. He says things like im his "future wife" but adds "lol" just to seem like he's joking. He constantly reminds me of the things ive done for him when he was at his lowest point. Thanking me millions of times.He calls me beautiful. He gets jealous easily but he tells me things about his girlfriend and other girls to make me jealous. He has done many attempts to get me to fall for him. Extreme attempts that it almost ruined our friendship. Besides the flirting he is a very nice person(obnoxious at times)but very sweet. He has given me many gifts such as food he has cooked (he cooks a lot)and flowers and teddy bears (before he started dating) He told me he was giving me these things for "appreciation for what I have done" and if I didnt accept them, he made me. He is my best friend. He is very protective and defends me if someone is bullying me. He is very caring. He asks how my day was and sometimes good morning messages. He makes it his job to message me everyday and is always the first to start a convo. We will talk for hours on end just about silly things and joke around a lot. He comes to me when he needs someone to talk to and is going trough something and I do the same for him. He says that he will always be there for me if i need anything. He just the bestest friend you could ever ask for. I just feel like im taking advantage of him. Im trying hard to make our friendship work because I don't want to lose him. But he is constantly testing it. He tells me he's not over me even if he has a girlfriend. He treats me like I am his which I have told him to stop but he wont. Nearly everyone in the school knows of his crush on me. He tags me in posts on Facebook that say things like "Tag the most beautiful girl you know" or "tag a girl that you think is adorable" I just don't know what to do anymore! How can I save our friendship?! He was not always like this. Thank you for reading! I know it was long! :(
(link)
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I'm glad to hear this friend of yours has become a Christian and ceased his destructive behavior on himself. And I praise you for helping him.
You didn't mention how old you are, but I'm going to assume you're fairly young.
What I hear you saying is he wants more than a friendship and you don't...He's pressuring you and you feel uncomfortable with that.
With that understanding, I would say he is emotionally needy and that is a character flaw that turns off just about anyone. What needs to happen is he needs to overcome that. Thank God he has Jesus, because that's who's going to have to change him.
You obviously care about him, but the more attentive you are, the more you feed that behavior. It may come down to this...The only way to save the friendship is to walk away from it.
Let me share this...My husband and I met, were friends, parted ways because of complications, then came back together stronger than ever. But without that separation, we wouldn't have known how dear we really were to each other. We are best friends and that friendship has brought us through many hard times. I hope that makes sense.
Separating or not is your decision...you need to do what's right for you, but don't let him manipulate you. What I mean by that is him threatening to cut again or other things that would bring guilt and condemnation on you just to hold you in an uncomfortable place.
I pray the Lord God be with you as you wrestle though things.
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My husband is in the military and after 13 years he is separating due to medical reasons. He wants to move back to our hometown to be near both of our families, primarily his mother and aunt. Well, I am hesitate. I didn't have the best childhood due to both of my parents being alcoholics. They both still drink heavily and can get violent and emotional when doing so. My oldest brother still lives in the area and drinks excessively as well. To top it off, my sister-in-law and her husband live about an hour away and love to drink and party and are somewhat open swingers. Their sexually active 15 year old daughter is free to do as she pleases and their 12 year old son is often left on his own. While I respect my husband for wanting to be near his mother and his disabled aunt, I am having a hard time dealing with the fact of being near the rest of our family. While it would be nice to be near family, this is not the situation I have envisioned. I don't want our children thinking drinking excessively and having multiple partners is okay. Should I accept the fact we are moving back and deal with the situation as it comes or continue trying to talk my husband into moving somewhere else? (link)
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Wow...The total sacrifice should not be on you alone. Is it possible for you and your husband to compromise? Seems like being too close will poison your kids and strike resentment in you which would poison your marriage. Maybe move CLOSER, but not in the same town? Perhaps by making it a bit inconvenient for your family to visit, may make their influence less threatening.
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i have been confused about what i should be, i am a female that is more comfortable dressing in male clothes, i act more masculine then i do feminine however i do have certain female traits that keeping coming out (maternal - from when i was a step mum). i have been reading up and considering going through with a sex change operation. the only thing that is holding me back is i want kids and want to be able to conceive naturally. (link)
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Life can sometimes be confusing. The events of our past, our experiences in life, and the way we think have all been formed by a complex and intricate web. That is how we have become who we are. But...the question is really who do we want to be? You have said that you want to conceive naturally and be a mom. That is a wonderful and amazing goal. In order to do that, your "female you" needs to emerge. Dressing and acting masculine often comes from rejections or difficult affections from our past and you may need help sorting out those desires. Perhaps there is some healing of the inner you that only God can do. God is able to help you…He wants to help you. Seek God to show you the reason for the gender identity conflict and ask for healing of whatever would hold you back from carrying out your deep desires to be a mom.
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I started dating a girl in December, I'm not going to say all the normal love stuff, because, this was a normal relationship, we believed we were perfect for eachother, we loved eachother, ect. Her parents liked me, I went to church and all with them, they were Catholic I'm Baptist.
Well, she would always say how she's always hungry, she doesn't eat as much (later finding out they sometimes don't give her food for like a day or two), her parents call her names like slut, whore, bitch, just cause their mad or so, or they'd slap her, like, they slap her all the time when they don't get their way basically. Sometimes they whip them (her and her sister) with a belt I believe, but it never leaves bruises so she thinks it's "not illegal" because of that, but it burns and hurts her like hell. One time she said "my mother whipped me with a belt 15 times because I drew on the blinds"
Anyways on with the story, everything was normal, until the day before valentines day, her mom grounded her because we were 30 minutes late from the lake which was half a mile away. February 17th or 18th I forget, she got in a argument with her mom, as always the slapping, name calling, she was unhappy. We ran away in the middle of the night together, she said she was going to run away even if I didn't.
So, I protected her, we ran away, we were gone for 18 hours. When we came back, we went into the house and talked to the parents, well, the parents are HIGHLY manipulative and all so remember this later. The mother said how she doesn't even want my girlfriend there, if it wasn't for the dad she wouldn't be there, and responsibility this responsibility that, basically saying their all gonna die if she doesn't do things right, her mother is literally mentally unstable or something... The cop came obviously, the dad said I was a good kid he liked me and all, and we hugged when I left. Everything was normal.
The next day I went there, the mom was mad obviously, we hanged out for 2 or 3 weeks in a normal way. Then I had to goto another state for 3 weeks, I told them I was leaving, and I really was, but I had problems and went to the state over instead with my family for 5 days. Well, we snuck out when I got back because we knew we wouldn't be able to see eachother until the weekend, we always wanted to see eachother. This wasn't the first time we snuck out, and we've been caught 3 times before by her parents. They forgave us though each time.
This time, I lied to the mom sadly saying I was in Missouri. Acted like I was worried the next day ect, the sister had told the mom the truth I guess. The mother 2 days later (March 7th) filed a Protection Order, for no legit reason. Ill say the statements later. The P.O. was served to me March 9th
The dad, is like loyal to the wife because their catholic and all, not to bash the religion in any way. But he just is. I know he would never do this, he didn't file anything. Anyways I went to the house to reconcile with him and he just kept saying go, go, go bla bla no reason then just started saying I was too old. He knew I wasnt, he liked me, he was just doing this for the wife. Cops ended up coming I still refused to leave because I wanted to reconcile, then they tresspassed me.
Anyways, March 17th, I went to walmart, they were all there, the dad walked like "Hey (my name), I see you got a job!" What? "You're wearing your uniform!" Oh yeah "Well, bye!" he was all happy and everything.
After seeing me 3 more times he left with my gf to the car.
March 20th came, the P.O. court date, the statements on it were "Ran away, sneaking out to the lake several times, reporting bullying and saying everything will be okay" I reported her being bullied from people.. And they think thats bad? Hah. Well, the mom anyways. We told the judge about how their using me as a disclipinary tool, how they call her names and mental abuse, how I always just helped her. Not really detailing it but that's short for it, Judge said "Everything was in good intentions for her nothing was done wrong, all he did was help her." and set the P.O. for 3 months.
We got letters on March 24th and March 27th saying how they hurt her she doesn't wanna be there that they say their the "dictators" of the family and they slap her, call her bitch and slut, and that her Aunt threatened to kill me and has a plan and a gun in her car. And will do anything for her mom she doesn't care cause she loves her mom.
Sad.
April 3rd we violated it, she was being starved I heard so I was going to take her to McDonalds, cops caught us within 5 minutes because I "ran a stop sign", well I was on a slope. It was dark, so yeah.
April 9th, the mother chased me, followed me, I ran from her to my friends house and a cop started grabbing me for no reason when he came to investigate so I pushed him and got charged for assault and battery and a violation, went to jail for 6 days. I really did nothing wrong, this cop just started grabbing me then shoving me into the police car because I yelled my mothers number at my friend because he wouldnt let me call her, I KNEW the cops wouldn't call her thats why I tried. Cop wasnt listening to me say they were chasing me before all this, he detained me as soon as he saw me in my truck he said get out and I did then I was like am i being detained he was like yes. He cant do that without any further cause...
So yeah I was arrested. Went to jail for 6 days and now I'm under 24/7 supervision for awhile, we believe their going to give me probation in another state...
Well, we have around 3 open DHS cases on her, then 2 more from other people we believe. But DHS hasn't visited her since ending of March, its May now. And their all open cases.
Now here's where things get interesting, this just happened, and is why I'm looking for help.
2 days ago she showed up to my house, freezing, wet, covered in grass. It was a 4 mile walk to out here, through the lake woods and all. I was so sad I let her in, got her my sweats and got her warm, held her, she explained what happened how they hurt her and she doesn't wanna be there, she showed me a bruise which is the size of a french fry, my friend and her said it was bigger, it's 4 days old, still blood red.
Her mother ended up showing up, we called the cops, but she was saying she doesn't wanna be there they hurt her they hit her they call her names and just wanted help... A Sheriff came in, I was in the other room then because the PO, my mother was with them, my Gf had said all I've said how they hurt her and call her names she doesnt wanna be with them shes scared and unhappy and some stories on how they hurt before.
So sheriff took her to the police car and then talked to us then talked to her parents. There was another sheriff here then, they pulled out a letter. They talked for like 30 minutes. Now before we continue, this family is highly manipulative, believable, looks normal but when you leave their house their evil and hitting her. They've lie to the POLICE (not sheriff) to think were Sex Traffickers, idk if they believe it just because "were from Arizona" and my mother said it was okay if my Gf wanted to live with us, when she ran away, if it was okay with the parents. So because of that they lie about some stuff.
My gf said to the sheriff how when the police come her parents make them goto the room and their never really questioned or get to talk that the police and her parents just get along... So now theres gonna be more DHS and police involved I guess.
Anyways, sheriff sent her back with the mom, said theres going to be in-house DHS counciling, police, and all. It's devestating because my GF absoloutely doesnt want to be with them, they seriously hurt her. They wont let her go with her real mom the sheriff said "THAT IS NOT POSSIBLE" in a loud voice, because the mother lied to them we think.
The letter the mother showed them was a letter, in short, saying "I'm running away to see (my name)" which ruined everything I think. Because cops said she didn't run away because they hurt her, which is WHY she did run away, she told me, but yes, she came to me to tell me first, she wanted help they do hurt her.
What can we do?!
I've made about a 6 page letter to the dad since theres no Protection Order from him...
Were not doing this just so we can see eachother, that's part of the reason, but they really hurt her she wants out.
I have just turned 17 and she has just turned 15, at the end of April and beginning of May.
When she came here she said her mother had said "Now I see why (cousins name) mother let her boyfriend move in." (link)
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Wow! That is a tough situation. There's always a legal approach, but sounds like that hasn't been working for ya. My advice is get solid evidence and then take it to Health and Human Services. Evidence from hidden cameras is what comes to mind. Or try to record a conversation. Human Services then has the power to step in and remove her from the home and place her in foster care. At least she'd be safe.
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I used to be a really nice person but now not so much what are some things I can do to be nice? (link)
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Being nice is the act of being hospitable. That means...smiling, say hi to people, treat people with respect whether they return the action or not. Put other people's feelings before yourself. Keep a good attitude whenever possible. Obey authority figures in your life. Give little gifts without telling where they came from. Hug your mother. Friend people who have no one...who have less than you. Stand up for the ones who can't speak for themselves. Be willing to serve...doing things that aren't necessarily fun, but helps someone else. Do things expecting nothing in return and you'll be surprised by how much people will open up to you and treat you the respect.
Keep yourself from being selfishly motivated and you will be naturally nice. :-)
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15/f. a few years ago I got caught[by parents] with cutting & depression. Between then and now I've struggled with S.I & eating disorders..but Ive managed to have 99.999% of people convinced I'm COMPLETELY over everything and am totally healed. but I'm more depressed than ever..just got too good at hiding it. Everyone sees me as the Jesus Freak..and I was. until recently, idk I just started to fall away from religion =\ anyway.
theres a guy my dad works with that has a daughter my age thats been cutting a lot and everything like I was. I agreed to talk to her if she wants. my mom suggested that i introcude her to religion and tell her my 'success story'
but I dont know how to go about this since I'm not better and i confused about God right now.[obviously i cant tell my mom that.]
helpp? (link)
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First of all, I'm proud of you for coming clean with the reality that you aren't okay. It took courage to speak it even on a forum like advicenators. This is a terrific start.
I feel a real need to address the religion aspect of your dilemma. Do you have religion or relationship? There's a big difference between having religion and having a relationship with God through Jesus. Religion deals with following rules...the do's and don'ts. Having a relationship with God through Jesus deals with the heart. God is in the heart changing business not the "good works" of religion business. He loves and wants YOU.
I was a sexually abused child. I had issues piled on top of issues. I understand all the things you're feeling. Been there. Let me tell ya, it took lots of heart changing. Let me explain a few things I learned.
Depression comes from a heart issue of focusing on self. Yes, there can be brain chemical imbalance that makes a person more easily drawn to depression, but depression can be resisted and overcome by focusing on God. Reading His word is a powerful way to defeat depression. Let me make it clear that it's not the act of reading the Bible, but reading it with a heart of seeking God's help. It's an attitude of realizing Jesus is the only one who can do anything about the situation. Depression is not overcome by everyone telling you you're fine, but rather by truly opening up and letting God deal with your heart.
Many told me to just go and do something that will raise my self esteem. Self esteem is esteeming self and actually stirs depression. The people who are telling you that you're fine are probably trying to lift your self esteem and, as you're finding out, it's making the depression worse. It may even be pushing you into isolation. That cycle keeps going around and around until it's properly dealt with. Relationship not religion.
Cutting is an emotional release. Most teens I know of that cut have a hard time releasing deep seeded hurt and anger through the natural way of crying tears. Again, a heart issue that needs to be dealt with. Spending time with the Lord in prayer; telling Him about the hurt will bring release. Perhaps keeping a journal of your prayer time.
Eating disorders...I suffered with anorexia in my young adult years. People said I would be fine if I just started eating. Eating brought my weight up, but I was still dying inside from a wrong view of my worth as a person. The anorexia came back several years later. It wasn't until I was honest with God and allowed Him to show me my worth in His eyes. You. Me. We are wonderfully made by the creator of the universe.
We have an enemy of our souls, the devil, that loves it when we focus on ourselves and when we keep things hidden. He knows that as soon as things are spoken and brought out into the light of Christ, he no longer has power over us. When I broke the silence about the sexual abuse, there was nothing for the devil to stand on anymore. One by one, over time, the other things disappeared.
It sounds like you are under a lot of pressure to talk to this girl, but what I get from your explanation in your question is that right now, you won't have much to offer her until you remove the mask your hiding behind and get healed by seeking God in this.
IN ADDITION: I'm so glad to hear you know Jesus. Just because things are seemingly rocky right now, doesn't mean your relationship with Jesus can't be restored. There's a lot of tension in the world economically and such, but the spiritual tension is even greater. We need to band together as brothers and sisters in Christ and hold each other up. Fight the thought life that is trying to drag you down. Get in and stay in the Word. Seek out people who will encourage you and help you grow. And contact me anytime. I will keep you in my prayers.
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sorry i didnt know under which category to put this.
erm so some ppl say that in year 1012 the poles are shifting or smth and that its the end of the world.
is this true???? :[ (link)
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Since you put this in the spirituality category, I'm going to give a spiritual answer directly from the Bible.
The Bible says in Matthew 24:36 "No one knows the day or hour. The angels in heaven don't know, and the Son himself doesn't know. Only the Father knows." (CEV)
Since no one knows, any prediction is false. You need only make sure you are prepared by having a relationship with God through His Son Jesus. If you know Jesus as Lord and Savior of your life, that day will be a joy for you because you will go home to be with Jesus forever. So if you know Jesus, you have nothing to fear no matter when that day occurs.
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I'm really interested in mission trips, to other countries or states. Next year, im going to an indian reservation in South Dakota and to Africa with the Thrive Africa orginization. I wondered if anyone knew about good mission opertunities that i could participate in with an orginization. Thanks! (link)
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YWAM (Youth With A Mission) http://www.ywam.org
Excellent organization.
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Is cussing bad, like does God not like it or does it say in the bible not to do it cuz i cuss all the time but i have a gut feeling im speaking viley. (link)
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Bless you for caring about what God thinks. That is awesome! Here is what God says about cussing:
God says in Exodus 20:7 "You shall not take the name of the LORD your God in vain, for the LORD will not hold him guiltless who takes his name in vain." (ESV)
So, God's name as a cuss word is bad; very bad.
As far as other cuss words, God says in Matthew 15:18 "But the words that come out of your mouth come from your heart. And they are what make you unfit to worship God." (CEV)
Only God can see each person's heart, but the words that we speak give a good indication of whether we are pleasing God or not.
The fact that you are feeling conviction tells me you recognize that God is trying to get your attention. Since cussing is the concern you have and the bible says that what comes out of the mouth comes from the heart, I'm guessing He wants to deal with you on a heart issue.
My advice is to open your heart to what God is trying to do in you.
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I will be a senior at a private 4-yr school and will graduate with a BA in astronomy-physics and possibly a math minor. My problem is that I feel burned out and don't like academics anymore. I was going to go to Grad. school but now I don't know if it would be best for me. I'm a mediocre student (B's, C's, sometimes A's) which is due partly to me being unable to handle all the math and partly due to personal problems. I had 4 major knee surgeries my first two years of college, which didn't affect me academically, because my first three semester classes weren't hard for me, and plus being on crutches really cuts down on social time, so I did homework a lot but still had plenty of time to relax. I got most of my A's during this period. My mom also has Bipolar disorder which is stressful for me and causes my family financial difficulties. My fourth semester, my mom sliced her stomach open with a razor while I was eating breakfast. She cuts herself when ever she has an episode, and this was the first time she did anything since she had a psychotic episode my Junior year in high school and tried to kill her self twice. My parents also told me they were afraid of bankruptcy (though this never happened). As a result, I failed the mid-term I took after coming back to school and got my first C in physics. I had major panic attacks afterward and nightmares about my mom killing herself. I also had somatic symptoms like not feeling my arms and legs are part of my body. I made it through by talking to a school therapist. My mom hasn't hurt herself since then due to a medication change. Unfortunately, I had more problems. My Junior year, I decided to live of campus which was a disaster. The house I lived in had mold in the basement, a leaking foundation (we had 55 gal of water) and electrical problems as well as several other problems that are too long to go into. After that was handled, I thought I could finally concentrate on school, but then all my housemates got into huge arguments and I ended up losing a large number of friends over the ordeal. The main cause of this was one girl who got off anti-depressant mediation, but still..I also overloaded on credits that semester and struggled with academics as well as having my panic attacks return after not having them over the summer due to all the stress. Then, this spring one of my friends committed suicide. I again had nightmares and panic attacks and went through a very intense grieving period. I went to college expecting to make a better life for myself and have only become very unhappy. In high school, I told myself if I work hard now, I can relax later, but later never comes. I also feel like a screw up because now I probably can't get into grad school even if I wanted to, because I have too many B's and C's in upper level classes. I'm constantly stressed during the school year because I rarely have free time any more, and while I still have some friends, I did lose many last year and my current friendships are shaky. And when I do try and relax, I feel guilty that I'm not doing something productive. I also feel very unmotivated and don't feel satisfaction and fulfilled from academics any more. It's had to feel satisfaction when I can only do mediocre. I can spend hours working on a problem, only to be told how to do it better, then I do it better, and am told how to do it even better than that. The problem is never done. It feels futile. My friend killed himself because of the stress from college and not getting into Columbia and I have two friends who took semesters off due to stress. The stress just doesn't seem worth it to me anymore. I can't help but think Grad. school would be worse than this. I got a job working as a hostess/buser at a restaurant and I feel much happier than I have in years working at this job than I have doing anything else. It's because I get many things out of this job that I don't get in the rest of my life. I get to serve people at the restaurant and please others and possibly make someone's day better, which never happens in school. I also get praise for doing well and instant criticism when I do something wrong which is better than the stress of waiting a week or more for a grade. I get paid instead of struggling to pay for school through financial aid, scholarships, and working. I feel much more productive and like I'm doing some good at my restaurant job. School currently just feels futile. There's no satisfaction, and I don't think changing majors would help. Although being a hostess/buser makes me happy, I can't do that with my life because of my knee problems. I can do it now, but I already have arthritis, so it's unlikely I can continue to do it for the long term. I've thought about being a writer instead, but it has no financial security. What should I do to be happy? I don't want to take pills because they screwed my mom up pretty bad and they make it so she can't concentrate or focus on anything. It just keeps her alive. I don't want to end up like my mom. What should I do? I think I just need a change in direction in my life, but what would be a good change in direction? (link)
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First of all I want to say that you put this question in the right category. The peace you crave is not found in schooling, in pills, in friends, or anything else that is temporal. The peace you are looking for is found in Jesus Christ and Him alone.
I'm not saying that these other things don't have their place, but praise God you are seeking outside of them. The Bible says "that His yolk is easy and His burden is light". Picture a "yolk" of oxen. They are out in the field doing a job together. So that bible verse means if you move through life hooked to Jesus Christ, He will help you carry or pull the load; whatever that load may be.
The restaurant job is a good active example of how God wants His children to be serving Him. But first you need to know God in a personal way through faith in His Son Jesus and that starts with repentance. The familiar verse of John 3:16 "For God so love the world (For God so loved YOU) that He gave His only Son Jesus, that whoever believes in Him will not perish, but will have eternal life."
I don't know what you should do regarding schooling and such, But I know God has a perfect plan for your life and He wants to show you what it is. You are dearly loved by the Creator of the universe. It sounds like God is reaching out to you and, knowing God the way I do, I KNOW he wants soooo much for you to reach to Him. You have His approval. He's waiting to teach you His ways, and maybe, just maybe, He may take you in a direction you never thought of.
We look for happiness when in reality it's joy that we seek. True joy is found in knowing Jesus. Happiness relies on "happenings". Joy comes from God. As you are finding out, no one will ever find true joy from "happenings".
Fill the empty God-shaped hole deep inside of you with the love of Jesus. That's the only thing that will satisfy your longing.
ADDITIONAL: What you refer to in the feedback is religion. What I'm talking about is relationship. HUGE difference. Without a RELATIONSHIP with God through Jesus, none of us has any hope. I will pray for you.
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why is it so dangerous i mean did you havee an experience on it. How come you know if it is bad or not.Some people use it for good to contact older people in there families and some ude it to contact the bad side. But how DO YOU KNOW IT IS SOO BAD? explain?? (link)
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I don't know what you're referring to. What is "it"?
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I am 30 years old, female, and I have been married for 10 years. We have two children, ages 7 and 8. I love my husband and I would describe our relationship as a good one.
My problem is I think about my ex boyfriend. A lot. As in every day a lot. Where this starts to become strangely pathetic is the fact that I haven't seen him or had contact with him in 13 years. He was my boyfriend my junior year of high school. We were only together a few months. Our relationship ended when he dumped me, and I (being 17 and completely emotional) was heartbroken. I got married when I was 20, and I dated a few guys between this ex and my husband. I never give any of the others a second thought.
It really bothers me that I still think about him so much, especially after SO MUCH time has gone by. I know they say you never forget your first love, but this has become beyond ridiculous. I'm far too humiliated to admit this to any of my friends and family. This may sound trivial, but it's become a minor form of torture and is interfering with my life and peace. Please tell me, what can I do to stop this stupidity? (link)
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You didn't mention if you're a Christian or not, but I am going to approach this from a spiritual point of view. We have an enemy of our souls who loves to get in our heads and mess around. The break down of the family is a power weapon the enemy uses to have his way. If he can lure you away from your husband, he gets a strong-hold in your life because your protection is gone.
I know your eyes are going to get big at this response, but you need to tell your husband about these thoughts. The enemy will put every reason in your mind as to why you shouldn't tell him, but do it anyway. Being "far to humiliated" is one of the tactics the enemy is already using to condemn you which is preventing you from telling your husband (or anyone you know). You obviously realize the seriousness of what's happening because you told me and that's a terrific start, but by telling your husband, the marriage bond you have strengthens. The enemy can't stand against it.
If you don't bring this out from its secret place and shine light on it by telling your husband, I can bet it won't be long and you will find yourself acting on the thoughts. The thoughts themselves are disrupting your life, acting on them will destroy it.
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My name is Paige and i want a new sn...what should it be? My middle name is Victoria to..reply (link)
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Hello Paige,
hmm...I don't know. For what purpose are you going to be using the name? Got some ideas you want run by me?
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Hi
thanks for your answer to my question on religion. now i was wondering about my son. I did not have him baptized or circumsized. He is under two. Have I put his chances of getting to heaven in jeopardy? And also, his father and I are not married, yet we are together. Is that sinful? Thank you (link)
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You're very welcome. And I want to say how awesome it is and how proud of you I am that you took the responsibility to have given your son life. So many do the selfish abortion cop-out thinking life will be fine. From every woman I have talked to who has had an abortion, ended up an emotional wreak.
I was in a similar situation as you. I had my son when I was 17. When I accepted Jesus as Lord and Savior, I started praying for God to help me. Thanks to God intervening and me embracing that help, my son has made wise choices and is now a godly young adult. He's a Lieutenant in the army, has a beautiful wife and 2 great kids who he is raising in the ways of the Lord Jesus. Just wanted to encourage you with that.
Let's address circumcision first. Without getting to complex, I'll simply state it this way. Circumcision was a command given by God to Abraham for the Jewish people to show that Abraham and his descendants have kept the covenant of faith. (See Genesis 17) Whether you have your son circumcised or not, has no barring on his salvation. Circumcision is still done today as a hygiene issue, but the faith covenant is found in Christ.
Now baptism...Many believe that they're on their way to heaven because they were baptized as a baby. That belief is wrong. There were no babies baptized in the Bible. A person goes to heaven because they have repented and accepted God's gift of grace through faith. That means they have asked Jesus to be Lord and Savior by repenting (repent means to turn away from sinfulness)and accepting His sacrifice on the cross for their sins.
The bible says in Mark 16:15-16 "Then he told them: Go and preach the good news to everyone in the world. Anyone who believes me and is baptized will be saved. But anyone who refuses to believe me will be condemned." (CEV)
Baptism is not a requirement of salvation; belief is. This passage doesn't say "anyone who refuses to believe in me and is not baptized will be condemned". That's because belief (faith) IS the requirement for salvation. Baptism is the outward expression of an inward faith.
So not having your son baptized is not what would be putting him in jeopardy. What would put him in jeopardy is you not taking the responsibility of making sure he grows up knowing that he can have a personal relationship with God through Jesus. Then when he is at a place of accepting Jesus, he can make that decision. The first step is letting God work IN you so He can in turn work THROUGH you.
When you say your son's father and you are together, I'm going to assume you mean living together or, even if not living together in a physical sense, there is an intimate relationship going on. If this is the case, yes, it is sinful.
My advice to you is to seriously consider taking yourself out of the situation; to stop living together and stop sexual activity. If you're thinking about marriage, it's only a good thing if you both are on the same spiritual page. If you're reaching for Jesus and he isn't, you won't be in unity. God can change his heart too; it may just take some time.
As a side note, I'll tell you this, when I repented and accepted Jesus as my personal Lord and Savior, I felt like a virgin again. Pure and clean before the Lord and I stayed that way until I got married. God is a God of second chances.
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Raised in a catholic family, attending catholic school, i rebelled against christianity. I feel I had no religion until I was about 19 and realized I believed in the Great Earth Mother, who gave birth to the world and everything in it. I have prayed to this goddess for years until recently confused. I have always known deep down that something very significant would happen in my lifetime. I have learned a lot recently about the "end times" and the rapture. Which brings me back to the bible and am now thinking that God and Jesus is real. I know the Mayan calendar ends in 2012. I know we have seven years of tribulation before the apocalypse. I know war and famine and earthly destruction is beginning as i write this. i researched bible codes and feel there is a lot of truth in that. what i do not understand is the significance of men in the bible and religion. in the story of adam and eve, women are basically cut down. the messiah, jesus was a man. god is portrayed as a man. Yet women are life giving and wise. (not saying men are not wise). it would only seem to me that the mother of earth is in fact female in a way. if there is so much truth in the bible, then why are women insignificant as compared to Jesus and the prophets? if i do not believe in jesus deep down in my heart am i destined for hell although i am a good person? God chose women to give birth and and i think all that is today came from a female figure, because only women give life. if the rapture is real, i do not wish to be left behind because i don't believe in my heart that Jesus is our savior. I love life, i love people, i stay away from evil. i also do not think gay people or unmarried parents are wrong like it says in the bible. it pains me to think life ends with death. Even if my question is not precise, any insight will do , since i cannot fully give you the gist of my confusion. thank you (link)
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You have many things in your question and I will attempt to address what I can. It sounds to me like God is reaching out to you and attempting to draw you to Himself. This is a big deal.
We all have a God-shaped hole inside of us. We can try to fill it with other things like "stuff" or false beliefs, but when it comes down to it, that hole can only be filled with the love of the one true God; the God who created Heaven and earth and everything in it; who loves us without measure; who sent His only Son to die in our place. The God of the Bible.
Significance of women and men --
God is a triune God. Three persons; One God. He made man (general term meaning humanity; men and women) in His image. Like Him, each of us are one being yet three; body, soul and spirit. Not only are we made in God's image, we are the only part of creation that has the privilege of a personal relationship with God Almighty. Men and women in God's eyes are the same from a spiritual standpoint. He loves us equally. The difference is the roles He has given us. God made Adam and Eve to be compatible partners. To interact with Him and each other.
The man has authority over the woman. This is not to bring women down as insignificant, but to protect them because woman are precious. God placed in men the desire to protect and provide. God placed in women the desire to nurture. If we lived in a perfect world, the roles of men and women would be played out perfectly. But we don't live in a perfect world. We live in a sinful world. (see Genesis chapter 3)
Speaking to Eve, it says in Genesis 3:16b "...Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you." (ESV)
God was saying that because of sin entering into the world, women will now desire to have the role of authority, but the man will still be ruler.
The relationship between me and my husband is not perfect by any means, but I submit to him. Why?
Because God says in Ephesians 5:22-23 "Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior." (ESV)
Submitting to my husband isn't hard because he is a God-fearing man who loves me the way Christ loves the church. I have a sense of freedom because I am obeying Christ by doing that. This is a difficult, if not impossible, concept for people to grasp who don't have a personal relationship with God through His Son Jesus.
Religion --
I don't know what you were taught growing up, but God is not interested in our rituals and our following the "do's and don'ts" check-off lists. He wants a personal relationship with you. The law is designed to show us our sin. The law says do not steal, if we steal something, we have done something wrong and we know it. Without the law, we would not realize we need to be reconciled to God. It sends our hearts seeking Him to sort through the confusion and then we realize Jesus is real and we need Him to save us.
For the sake of illustration, let's say you had a goldfish you loved. The goldfish is swimming around in a tank of water. Would you take that fish to the ocean and "loving" drop him in the water because the tank is considered to restrictive? That fish would not survive and the dropping of it in the ocean would be considered cruel and unloving. But without a relationship with God through Jesus, we see God as a task-master trying to keep us in a restrictive tank instead of a loving Father who wants nothing more than us to turn to Him with our whole heart.
Believing what the Bible says --
The Bible is the inspired Word of God. We either believe it all or we believe none of it. There is no picking and choosing. God's Word is Truth. For example, you said you don't believe homosexuality is wrong like the bible says it is. God's Word says homosexuality is a sin. Whether you believe homosexuality is wrong or not, God's Word says it is. Someone else may say they believe it's okay to murder. God's Word says it's sin. That person can believe all they want that murder is okay, but God is not going to change to adjust to our fleshly desires, we need to change to line ourselves up with Him.
Being a good person and going to hell --
The Bible says in Ephesians 2:8-9 "For by grace you have been saved through faith. And this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God, not a result of works, so that no one may boast." (ESV)
It doesn't matter how many good works a person does, we will NEVER be good enough to reach a place of getting to heaven on our own. That's why Jesus came to take the penalty for us. Our part is to repent and then accept God's free gift of grace through Jesus' sacrifice. THEN our good works are treasures in heaven. In other words, we do good works BECAUSE we are saved and have a relationship with Jesus, not to achieve salvation.
The rapture --
There are many opinions surrounding the rapture. I can tell you this, No one knows when it will happen.
Matthew 24:36 "But concerning that day and hour no one knows, not even the angels of heaven, nor the Son, but the Father only." (ESV)
Those who have a relationship with Jesus will not fear that day, because that is the day they get to be in heaven with Him forever.
Will you be one of them? Repenting and accepting Jesus as Lord and Savior of your life is the answer. God's Word says in Romans 3:23 that "ALL have sinned and fallen short of the Glory of God." (ESV)
And the Bible says forgiveness is for all who choose to repent. Act 3:19 says "Repent therefore, and turn again, that your sins may be blotted out," (ESV)
You may ask, how do I do that? Romans 10:9 answers that question. "...if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved." (ESV)
I'll leave you with this thought...if you seek Him with your whole heart, you will find Him. Matthew 7:7-8 "Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened." (ESV)
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Hi Cindy,
I always read your answers to questions and I am glad you are a believer and that you know Jesus. I am 14, and I am a christian. I live in a christian family and I am very much involved in church youth group and so is my brother who is 16. I was recently on my computer and I found an ''instant message'' conversation on my computer, which my brother was having with a girl, and it was written in a very sexual manner. I can tell that he is involved in sexual things, though I am not sure to what extent. He is also very resentful and insulting lately, and I am conjecturing that it is because he is involved with sin. I know that when we are very young, he was very much into sexual things for his age, and he always was talking about things with me which were way too innapropiate. I was thinking of asking my youth pastor about it, or just confronting my brother. What do you think I should do? Thoughts?
Thanks!
P.S. I do not have a good relationship with my parents, but, if my brother was actually having sex I would definitely tell them. (link)
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God bless you, little sister, for your mature attitude. It sounds like your brother is digging his way deeper into sexual sin. Like anything else, it starts out small and moves into something big. Your concern about this is valid and necessary. This is a serious matter and needs to be dealt with because according to James 1:14-16, your brother is in or at the very least, is headed into trouble.
He needs to be confronted about this. My advice is that you pray about how to go about the confrontation; whether it's something you should personally do or if you should tell someone that you can trust; someone who will back you up and take action.
Just a little side note...If your brother or anyone tells you things like, "that's what guys do." or "it's okay as long as there's not actual sex." Stand firm; these are lies. The bible says in Matthew 5:28, "But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart." (ESV) From what you have said, there is evidence of sexual sin already and it will only get worse unless it's brought into the Light.
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what religion is Obama, Clinton, and McCain?? thank you very much :) (link)
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Obama and Clinton are NOT followers of Christ. It doesn't matter what they CLAIM to be. Or what church they attend. They both support the murder of unborn children through abortion. Obama has muslim interests which means terrorism would not be controlled should he become president. There are numerous other things they support that are not biblical at all. I encourage you to check out for yourself what they support. They are not godly people. McCain supports the more biblical side of the big issues.
IN ADDITION: I am so glad you were looking at those things for yourself. Most people don't.
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