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about
I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
*happy
*employed
*married
*large extended family
*bisexual
*advanced college degree
*no kids (yet)
advice
Heres my proble im female and im 16 I hope you can help,so to make a long story short i fell for my best guy friend and he lead me on for like 6 months im crazy about him it got to the point where he has become me security blanket. i've been going through a really tough time in my life right now and hes been there for me i'd tell him i loved him and hed say i love too but he wouldnt date me and i asked if him it was okay that im so dependant on him, and he told me yes its fine im here for you etc. and just recently out of the blue he was like you call me too much, I cant be your security balnket anymore plus he met someone and basically he was like here ill give you some space get over me and like now we dont really talk hes ina erlationship with this new girl of his , im so hurt cause he just like left and he promise he'd always be there for me and he promised me alot of things but he did lead me ona nd now hes basically doesnt want anything to do with me and he told me left like he did because he got sick of being my friend and i know that, thats not really the main reason why its because of this new girl and i dont know im still in love with hima nd hes my best guy friend and im so confused and hes said oh im sorry a million times but i just cant forgive him a part of me wants to hate him so much but i jsut cant because i love him and he was the first guy ive ever fallen for and ive cried so much overhim and i just cant let go of him and accpet that he did what he did out of all the people i truey care about he walked out me just like my parents did, How can I get over him i need to so bad all he does is hurt me
Well, I think what happened was he put you in the "friend zone". Being in the friend zone is one of the worst possible things that can happen. You want to date him so bad and he leads you on so much, but won't date you because you're his friend. You're such a good friend to him and you're understanding and you love each other, but he just won't date you. This can be broken, but it's not easy. The reason he's avoiding you isn't because he doesn't like you or love you or because you annoy him or anything. He feels that by being so close to you, even though you're just friends, he's taking away from his girlfriend. He doesn't want her to break up with him because of you or anything and he sees you as a kind of threat to his current relationship. Don't worry, he still loves you, cares about you, and understands you the same. To tell you the truth the same exact thing happened to me last year and sparked the same exact feelings in me. I got so depressed and so sad because I "knew" that I'd end up with the guy. Two days after I told him I loved him he told me he had a girlfriend. I wondered what was wrong with me and why he didn't want to be with me. It took me awhile to get over him, but a month later I was in a relationship of my own. Even though I was still upset about him and still wanted to be with him, it was making me unhappy. I realized that I needed to do something. Because I was dating someone else it took my mond off of him. I'm over him now and have been for awhile. My boyfriend helped me, especially since he knew about it and I've been with him for a little over a year now. The guy I wanted to date has started talking to me again and we're still very good friends. My advice to you is to do what he's doing. Earlier, I said "He feels that by being so close to you, even though you're just friends, he's taking away from his girlfriend." You should find a relationship of your own. There's still a chance that you can be with your friend in the future, but for the time being, be happy and get over him. I hope I helped and good luck!
Do you have a xanga or myspace? If you dont, it think you should because it well tell all your adoring fans here, about you.
Wow thanks so much, you're so sweet! I do have myspace. The address is http://www.myspace.com/13135141.
:)
how do u make sweat pants look sexy? any advice *i rate 5 for any try that isnt just random*
Sweat pants that aren't baggy and sweat pants that have a low rise waistline and aren't tight around the ankles can be pretty sexy, on girls AND on guys. There isn't much you can do to the sweatpants that you already have (it looks silly if you roll them), but you can always buy a tighter pair. If the ankles are tight you can cut them, that looks pretty cool. I hope I helped and good luck!
ok so i shaved "down there" the whole thing but after words i got this really itches rash and it hurts so bad i dont understand what i did wrong. i used conditioner to make it softer and after words i put lotion on it
..do you think it could be from the lotion??
ill rate high.
thanks
The lotion probably actually helped. That area is very sensitive. When you first start shaving it, you'll get tiny cuts all over the place and they'll burn, itch, etc. What you should do is only shave it every 3 to 4 days or so to begin with and make sure you're using a sharp razor and are very careful. It'll take awhile for your skin to adjust so be patient. Good luck!
Okay, I have really bad facial acne, and have had it for about 4-5 years now. I have tried almost everything it seems, but it just won't go away! If you have any advice on acne, or even acne scars (I have both, lucky me)I'd love to know! ThAnKs!!
See a Dermatologist (skin doctor). I went to one last year and got a perscription face lotion. My acne was gone in less than two days. The stuff is amazing. It's really worth it. I hope I helped and good luck!
17/f
is it wrong to think lustfully about others? i mean i can understand if it gets 2 be a constant thing and you objectify them, then its bad.. but is it really that bad 2 have inappropriate thoughts if its only ocasionally? please help
Lust is one of the seven deadly sins. However, most people for some unknown reason believe it is worse than the others, which include jealousy, anger, and pride. You don't see anyone on advicenators saying "it's such a sin!" when someone says that they're jealous, but whenever anyone says the word "lust" people go crazy. It's impossible to live a life without sin and pretending that you don't sin is wrong. Jesus died to forgive people of their sins and all you have to do is ask. So, basically it's wrong to think lustfully of others and you shouldn't, but everyone does and they aren't able to help it. You're very normal and lusting after someone is okay just as long as it doesn't go overboard as you said and just as long as you know that it's wrong and ask for forgiveness. Good luck :)
Hey peeps. I am thinking of becoming a goth. But I have some dilemmas.
1 my mom wont let me be what I wanna be. I know the consequences. I told me mom that I wanted to dye my hair black, and she freaked.
2 I cant get past the metaphores. To goths, gothic sayings may have a meaning but when I hear or see gothic sayings or quotes or whatever, all I see is stuff about blood, guts, and death.
3 Idont know any chain stores that has a lot of gotic clothing and silver jewelry with the gothic sighns.
Help.
Wow. I'm really surprised at a lot of people's answers here and I wanted to comment on that. As I read through the answers people gave you I noticed that every single one of them was chock full of sterotypes and no one tried to understand you. I think it's awesome that you want to try a new style. You don't have to worship the devil, be depressed, and want to commit suicide to be goth. Goth and all other social classifications, in the end, are based on how you dress NOT on your personality. You don't have to have the attitude, you don't have to believe what "all other" goths believe because truthfully they don't all feel the same way as the stereotypical goth person does.
I don't think I can help much with your question, but I know they sell a lot of goth clothing at Hot Topic. I don't know much about goth stuff otherwise, sorry. Maybe you can convince your mom to let you try a non-permanant black hair dye. Talk to her about everything and tell her that you're not the stereotypical goth person, you just like the style and want to try something different. I hope I helped and good luck!
girl falls in love with guy
guy falls in love with girl
girl goes to college
he decides to try his best to let her go there with some freedom
they decide to keep an open relationship
she says she misses him "like crazy"
3 days later, she calls and ends even the dating
she says she can't love him
she says i love you before she gets off the phone
she says he made her really happy and it scared her
she says when she looks in his eyes she knows she loves him
she says when they kiss it scares her
she says nothing about why they can't date eachother..
he said enough in text messages to scare her
he didn't mean to, just wanted her to know what was on his mind
she just wouldn't say anything, give any reasons besides.. i love you, and i can't do that right now
can this really be true love? she wants him to think it was, and make it the reason we can't know eachother well... should drift apart even though we both don't really want to. not see eachother, not talk alot, not kiss...
how is that love? when did love give up on the world?
The problem being described in this situation is completely different from love. The girl is afraid of comittment. For whatever reason she is terrified. This is without a doubt really hurting the guy. I think both people love each other very much. I think the guy should talk to the girl about her fears and give her time to figure things out. This happens more often than you would think and usually it ends with the girl regretting breaking up with the guy for the rest of her life and wondering what it could have been like if she had stayed with him. Fear of committment is not a good reason for a breakup at all. It's something that can be talked through. It ends with MUCH more heartache and pain than pretty much any kind of breakup ESPECIALLY when love is involved because there is so much regret. I hope I helped and good luck.
My boyfriend and I been going out for a little over a year and I feel like im a noboby to him cause he never opens up with me, he won't tell me what he's feeling. Example..Just a feel minutes ago i called him and hes like hello and im like hello and he said what do you want and i said what do you mean what do i want don't you want to talk to me? he says no i don't want to talk to anyone and i asked him what's wrong and he just won't tell we got into a fight to because i hung up on him because he was being rude to me. This happens all the time! And i can't take it anymore, i want to feel like im his girlfriend when im around/talk to him not a fucking noboby!...Do you think i'm just wasteing my time on this, is the relationship dead? help please...
I agree with trey. My boyfriend does that sometimes and it used to upset me a lot, but now I understand him a lot better so it doesn't usually bother me at all. Guys can be like that and if you're patient, completely understanding, and sweet to him when he does it he'll probably tell you what's wrong eventually. There's no reason for you to just go and break up with him and he's not being a jerk as much as he's just uncomfortable and probably embarassed about sharing his emotional side with you or anyone for that matter. So, my advice is to give him some more time and try to be more patient. Good luck!
i have extremely rough skin, especially between my eyebrows, on my forhead, on my nose, and on my chin. what can i do about this?
Get an appointment with a Dermatologist (skin doctor). They'll be able to suggest an over the counter remedy, just like anyone here, but they will also be able to give you a perscription medicated treatment that you wouldn't be able to get elsewhere if you needed it. You'd be able to trust that whatever they say will probably work the best. I went to a Dermatologist for acne and all he did was look at me, ask me a few very brief, basic questions and give me a perscription. My acne was gone within two days of this stuff. It was pretty amazing. Good luck!
ok well for school we have to wright a persusive essay about something we feel strongly about adn i choose to wirght about abortion..well i was thinking that i dont really no that much about it but that it kills an innicoent child adn what it says on the internet..but i really need peoples opinions about why they are for or against it...i really need this nad its due tomorrow yes i no stupid to do things last min. but you no i forgot..
so whay would you be for or against or both on abortion?
please help!
I think that abortion is very wrong and I'm against it BUT there are cases where I think it would be appropriate and should be up to the mother and possibly the father too. Some of these include rape, incest, if the unborn child has a severe disability, and if the mother is at risk of dying from the pregnancy. I believe that pretty much anyone else is able to and should pay the consequences for having sex by going through with the pregnancy. If you're ready for sex you should be ready for the risks it involves. There are lots of families out there that can't have children of their own and would love to adopt a newborn baby. Good luck!
My "c" key on my keyboard always sticks. It's so annoying!! I'm on a laptop. It is okay to try to take the key off or will I break it?
The same EXACT thing used to happen to me. Same key and all, that's funny. Yeah, pulling it off isn't a good idea. What I did when it stuck was I would sit there and press it a whole bunch of times over and over and not gently. It was more out of frustration than anything, but afterwords it would stop sticking for awhile. You can't really clean it that easily and that's not the problem. I would say to move your finger around it while pressing it down to loosen it up. Pull up on it a little and shake it around. Pressing it a bunch of times should help too. Basically just mess with it to loosen it up and it'll go away eventually. I hope I helped and good luck!
I'm 19/m
I've never masterbated before, and honestly I've never had an urge to.. Am I abnormal?
No, not at all. You are in the minority, especially since you are a guy, but there's nothing wrong with that. It's nothing you have to do or should want to do unless you've done it before and liked it. However, it's something you may want to try in order to get to know yourself better so that you can help a partner give you more sexual pleasure. It can be really useful in those regards, but there's no reason to start doing it now if you're not in a relationship and don't plan on being in one in the near future. Masturbation does have other benefits, physical ones at that. Don't think I'm trying to talk you into it. If you don't want to, then don't. That's the bottom line. I just think that it's always good to at least know the benefits. I hope I helped and good luck!
What are some good musicals like Rent and Wicked?
Into the Woods, The Phantom of the Opera, Grease, Footloose, My Fair Lady, The Music Man, Annie, Beauty and the Beast, Peter Pan, Les Miserables, Damn Yankees, State Fair, The Sound of Music, Guys and Dolls, Bye Bye Birde, The Wizard of Oz, Cinderella, Hello Dolly, Chicago, West Side Story, and Carousel are some of the ones that I've seen and like.
When i was at the doctors, they said i had something called urethitis.. but when i tried to search it on the internet, it came up like Chlamydia or something like that.. is that the same thing? and what is it?
I think this is what you're looking for...
http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/000439.htm
I hope I helped and good luck!
ok....i'm 19 and.about a year and a half ago, me and this guy chad started dating but i had to move a few months later so we broke up becuase we had to, not because we wanted to. then i come back home to visit some of my friends about 3 months later and hes dating one of my best friends, which i thought i was ok with. she felt bad. but then the past few months i realize how much i still love him and he talks to me all the time and calls me baby and cutie and i know for a fact he still wants me back and if i were to move back home we could be together but i dont want anything to happen to my friendship but i love this guy with everything i have. what do i do?
Well, even though you two seem to have strong feelings for each other you have to keep this in mind: he has moved on. You'll find other loves in your life and hanging on to him may not be such a good idea. I don't think he's as committed to you as you are to him, which can be dangerous. He may not love you like you love him and there are lots of guys out there that you can have a great relationship with. Even if he does love you, love is different from compatibility. You two, because of distance, and because he's found someone else and you haven't, don't seem to be completely compatible to me. Seeing him triggered old feelings and memories because the breakup was peaceful, mutual, and for reasons other than the lack of strong feelings or love for one another. Remember the reason(s) why you broke up with him and how it was for the best. Maybe later in life you two will end up together, but don't count on that. Start seeing other people like he has when you are ready to. Believe me, you can find another love. I wish you all the best and good luck.
Me and this kid have been going out for about 2 1/2 months and it doesn't seem like he's very open. He'll write me e-mails and notes saying he loves me and how great I am but he never says it in person. We've only held hands a couple times and kiss on the cheak once but he kinda missed and got my ear. Please help me to try and get him more open.
-Despret
P.S. I had my friend{prettyblonde234) wirte me this so don't think it's her.
It's a lot easier for people to say how they feel over the internet or over the phone. It's only been 2 1/2 months and he probably isn't ready for or doesn't feel comfortable enough to say those things when he is with you. Give him some more time, but try to initiate it yourself too. He's gotta get over it sometime. Try talking to him about it and letting him know how you feel and everything without hurting his feelings. Try to coax it out of him. Good luck!
I'm really interested in environmental science, especially anything to do with Oceanography. Except one tiny little problem: I live in Wisconsin. Now that's cool, because I can still study around the Great Lakes or work on other environmental aspects, but I'm a bit turned off by the job opportunities. Everyone I hear of who has a degree in some related field ends up working for the DNR or Water Resource Management. I don't want to do that. I really want to be involved in new research, in the purely scientific aspect of it. Does anyone know any career opportunities in the Environmental Science or Oceanographic fields that are NOT part of some government-run organization? Thanks in advance.
Nevaeh :)
There are private foundations out there, but I think you're going to find most of them on the coast and yeah, most jobs in that field are going to be for the government. Once you get into college you can go to their Career center or talk to your academic advisor about job opportunities. They'll know a lot. Remember you can always go undeclared or just try something until you figure out what you want to do, it's not hard to switch unless you've been in college for a few years. I went for Marine Biology last year and this year, partly for the reason you mentioned, I'm going for Earth Science Education. It's all the same stuff basically, but I never considered teaching when I chose my major last year. Teaching is always an option and there are tons of opportunities.
i need serious help! i went to a movie tonight...and he tried to make out millions of times and i tried..but i just didnt know what to do! ive always been told it will come naturally..but it didnt at all! and now he thinks im mad at him and he thinks theres something wrong with him...annnnd he keeps calling me prude. help me PLEASE! what do i do?
That's pretty rude of him to say those things about you and feel that way about you when I'll bet he knows you're new at this. He needs to start being more understanding. You should talk to him about it and tell him that you're nervous or uncomfortable and that you want to kiss him, but you're afraid you won't do it right. The next time you're at the movies, just do it! Start by kissng him on the cheek maybe, then just do the same thing on his lips when he turns his face. Once you get started you'll be fine, but I agree, it doesn't come very naturally at first. It's going to be awkward, but after you've done it a few times, you'll get used to it and it will come naturally then. Good luck!
I used one of those Ink Refill things for printer ink and now i have ink on my hands. what can i use to get it off? I tried soap, doesn't work. I tried rubbing alcohol, it doesn't work well at all.
thanks in advance!
You could try what's called "Goop", which is a hand cleaner or maybe paint thinner. I hope it works...good luck!