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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
Hi there guys! Imma get straight to the point, my little brother went bathing in the rain, and since it's mid-summer, the rain's pretty dirty, I guess... Also, because it is mid-summer temperature got really hot and he was exposed to it. Then the next day he got this weird rash:
http://postimg.org/gallery/27r96bslq/f48d355d/
Sorry if you got disgusted, I just need to know what it is. Thanks
I don't need to look at the picture to tell you that none of us are doctors and we cannot offer you a diagnoses. Even if we were and could you cannot make a diagnoses off a picture. Your brother need to see a doctor.
In most cases a doctor will offer him an antibiotic skin cream and possibly an oral antibiotic as well. The doctor may also want to culture the rash to see just what type of infection he or she is dealing with. It is for this reason why a proper diagnoses cannot be given over the web.
In the interim until you can see a doctor a pharmacist may be able to offer some advice as to something to offer some relief for pain or itching. Though for a cure your brother must see your family doctor or a dermatologist.
Writing this was actually harder than I thought. My fingers feel almost too heavy just like my entire body. I just... I guess I feel lifeless. Nothing has been mattering to me lately - grades, social life, hygyene, health... nothing. But other times I feel like I'm on top of the world. I'm tired of these moodswings, I just want them to go away. I want everything to go away - so much violence, so much hurt, so much stress, so much failure. I feel like crying right now but I wont. My roommate is sitting right in front of me and I don't want to explain why I'm crying. She's on a completely different level. On a "high of sugar" apparently. I envy her and her happy-go-lucky attitude. Nothing seems to weigh her down. But I'm not like that. I break easily. I get hurt easily. I don't say or show it often, but I do. I should probably stop before I cry. I feel pretty stupid when I cry, which makes me cry even more, and it turns into a vicious cycle. Right now I'm venting instead of telling my problem, but that's it: I don't know what it is. I wonder, would anyone even miss me? I get ignored quite a lot, like today when a friend invited me to hang over, but instead I ended up trying to pretend I was playing with my pone because they were too busy in their conversation. I don't go out a lot. I used to be skinny and I'm gaining weight. I changed from Geology to English just because I can't do math as well as other people. My family is a mess and I can't stand my own father. I used to be in karate last semester but I dropped out this semester and now I feel even more worthless than before... I just... I feel like I could just... disappear and it wouldn't matter, because I'm insignificant. In this big world I'm just another girl, and I'm tired of pretending around others. When I ask others "what should I do?" I get responses that are as superficial as a Barbie doll, so I came to this site hoping that I can get over this... I hate feeling like this.
I'm not a doctor none of are so we cannot make any type of diagnoses. From what you have written it sounds a bit like you could be suffering from bipolar disorder or something very close to it. You definitely sound depressed which is part of the bipolar disorder as well as the stress you say your under.
depression is a cycle type problem as the depression causes pain and the pain causes depression. The difference with clinical depression and bipolar disorder which is a form of depression is you cycle from feeling good, the high, the feeling really bad, the low.
What I suggest is you go to the campus health center and ask to be screened for depression and bipolar disorder. Do I believe you are suffering from bipolar disorder I truly can't say a doctor will have to make that diagnoses. I don't think you are bipolar as there are other symptoms you have not mentioned. But you have hit upon many of the symptoms for clinical depression. Which ones diagnosed is easily fixed.
Young people, especially teenagers in the early stages of puberty and those in the first years of college do find themselves suffering unknowingly from depression and they do not have to. This is a problem that is brought on by the stressors of change and added expectations.
By going and being properly diagnosed a doctor can offer you help.
My mother is making me take a whole day out of my April vacation to see a college that's like an hour away. I told her that I didn't want to go because I'm only a sophomore and it isn't even the summer yet, but she wouldn't listen. A friend invited me to go somewhere fun that day but now I can't because she's forcing me to go see a crappy public college that I don't want to see. She thinks that there's no time like this week to see this public college. What do you think?
I'm old enough to be your grandfather so I am going to offer you some grandfatherly advice.
Given the question you have asked, and I will answer it with what I think. It does not matter what we think. Given your age you're too young to win this fight with your mother. To make a big stink or to make this visit totally unpleasant for both of you; you can only end up bad for you.
Given the facts as you presented them It is understandable why your mother would want to start looking at colleges early. The same information would explain why she is encouraging you to start looking at colleges now. It is really not all that early to start looking at colleges now especially if you have the grades to apply for early admission. Which you could start doing as early of next year.
Suggestion: Since there is something you want to do on the day mom wants to visit this college. Rather than fight her and say things like its too early, I'm not interested or other things. Tell her you have been invited to go someplace that day. Ask her if it is possible to go another day and you will go willingly without complaint. This is called a compromise.
My answer to your question. Part of my answer is in the above. If you have the grades to apply for early admission then this summer would be the time to start looking at colleges. You should be starting to eliminate those schools that do not offer the course you need to get into Dental School.
In state colleges cost less than out of state or private colleges. If your parents are going to be footing the bill for your education. Then the time to start discussing which schools they can afford is at hand.
Is mom wrong in forcing you to visit this school. That is a yes and no answer. She is a bit ahead of time in what she is trying to do though I can't say she is wrong.
In the end though as I said in the beginning. If you cannot find a compromise with her and you continue to fight with her; then you can only be hurt by doing so. So think before you act.
so ive been suffering depression for over seven years. im just about at the point where i CAN NOT stand it anymore. the emotional pain has gotten so bad throughout the years where it is now physical pain as well. and this is every fucking day. nothing makes me happy. not one single thing. i fake smiles and laughs everyday so no one will worry about me, but inside im depressed, broken, miserable, pained, etc all the damn time. ive done EVERYTHING to try to help myself: mental hospitals, residentials, psychiatrists, counselors, mentors, different medications, getting out of the house... NOTHING will fix me. like i am not happy, and i am so fucking suicidal. everyday i want to kill myself. and im so close to overdosing, and i know a kind of pill that WILL kill me if i take enough. i cant take this sharp pain anymore. i cant take wanting to die each day anymore. dont i have the right to end my own life now?
and please dont tell me to get help, ive been getting help constantly for over 7 years. it has never worked and will never work.
I have suffered from clinical depression so I know a bit about how you are feeling. What I do not understand is why with 7 years of professional help you are not feeling or getting any better.
I can think of only three reasons why you are not getting any better.
1. You are not seeing the right clinician or the clinician has not gained your trust enough to be successful.
2. You are not working with hard enough maybe because you do not trust your therapist.
3. You are not compliant with any medications you are taking or should be taking.
I too suffered with Clinical depression for a long time before I sought help. When I did I sought the help of a Board Certified Psychiatrist and a Psychologist. The Psychiatrist provided medication and worked with my psychologist to monitor my progress in talk therapy.
The primary cause of CLINICAL DEPRESSION is hormonal in nature. Meaning that certain hormones secreted into the brain are insufficient to control depression. The antidepressant generally is the generally prescribed medication as a replacement hormone for what is lacking or insufficient within the brain where it is secreted.
Yes at first you feel a bit fuzzy but after the medication takes hold and your body becomes accustomed to it you feel better and less fuzzy. There can be some side effects to these medications and if they are bothersome you speak to your psychiatrist about a different medication or different dosage.
Why a Board Certified Psychiatrist? This is a medical doctor who has had specialized training in a fellowship to deal with this type of problem. Your family doctor has not had this training and in some states a doctor who did a psychiatry round as part of his or her residency is allowed to practice psychiatry. This does not make them the best doctors to help us.
For talk therapy a psychologist is the best person to work with. Depression in people your age starts in puberty for as I said it is hormonal in nature and it is during puberty that your hormones get all mixed up. Also stress is a big factor. Puberty is very stressful on females especially. Put these all together and you have what is now diagnosed as teenage depression, a form of clinical depression.
I cannot say from the information you have provided why you are still suffering. I also am not a doctor. It is quite possible that by not seeing the right doctors you have not been properly diagnosed and treated. You need to give the right doctors another chance.
Suicide is not an option it is the wrong solution. I am living proof that the proper help works. You may need to find a new therapist, one you can trust. Possibly a female someone you can talk to. I'm a guy but I found working with a female psychologist very helpful.
Depression has a cycle. Depression causes pain, pain causes depression. You need to break that cycle. Until you get to the root cause you won't break the cycle. My therapist saw something and continued to chip away until I gave in. It was something so deeply hidden by me that I didn't even realize I remembered it until one day in a therapy session it all came tumbling out. Once it did she helped me put it in its proper perspective and it is no longer hidden. I deal with it. Its in the past.
Give yourself a chance with the right doctors. Life is worth living. IF after reading this you still feel suicidal call 911.
Im no going to say my age because it shouldn't matter. But I can't talk to my mom about my problems because she has her own to worry about, on top of looking after 3 children on her own.
I've been having problems with my chest and sometimes my breathing but my mom thinks it's heartburn but I have also been getting moments when my body get weak and I know I do have serious menatl health problem but never got tested properly........
My dad died when I was twelve and I haven't been coping to well, I told my dad everything about how I was feeling and what was bothering me, now I can't talk to anyone about how I'm actually feeling because no one in my school would understand and I can't talk to my family because it would upset them and I don't feel comfortable talking about my feeling to them or even anyone.
I would be lying if I said I never taught about suicide or self-harming, I guess that's why I'm on here. I heard that if you went to hospital or even the cops and told them you were going to commit suicide that they would have to keep you in hospital for 72 hours, but if I were to do that what would I say exactly and how would I do it without my family finding out? And what would be the best excuse to tell them where I'm going besides a friends house?
I am old enough to be your grandfather so I will try and give you advice as if you were my grandchild.
The first thing you need to know is never try to think what problems or worries parents have and how they may affect you. No matter what other problems or worries we may have our children always come first and I'm sure your mom and the rest of your family feel the same way. Your dad passing away may have put an extra burden on you mother , it did not change her priorities or to see to it her children are healthy.
You say mom thinks your problem with your chest is heartburn. I'm not a doctor though I have been a first responder with a fire department. Heartburn generally does not associate with breathing problems. If you are having breathing problems this is considered a life threatening event, one which means you should call 911 for help. The medic on the ambulance will tell you if you need to go to the hospital and be treated.
While you are at the hospital you can tell the doctor about the mental problems you are having. The 72 hour mandatory stay is for those people who are involuntarily brought to the hospital by police or sent by the courts.
If you go to the hospital on your own a mandatory stay is up to the doctors. Most patients are sent home with medication and appointments for treatment in the clinic.
If you are having trouble breathing or feel you might hurt yourself you do not need parental permission to call for help. Pick up a phone and dial 911. Tell the call taker what is bothering you and the proper help will be sent to you.
Part of the worries you belief mom has of her own include you and your siblings. all parents worry about their children. My son is nearly 40 years old. I still worry about him. Today I worry about him because he has a dangerous but very needed occupation. He is a firefighter/paramedic and it is through him that I know if you call 911 someone like my son will respond and take good care of you.
It happened for the first time in my life today, and I go to Wal-Mart probably more than any other store. I feel offended. Wal-Mart is not like Costco, where workers always check receipts, so I feel like I was discriminated. I was taken aback, I thought the greeter was just going to say "good-bye" like they normally do, but then he asked me to show my receipt for literally $7 worth of items, in bags. I did self-checkout and then walked to the other side of the store, because it was heavily raining and I wanted to be closer to my car. I've done that a lot, actually, and never envisioned that could potentially come across as suspicious. But then the guy says I could have just somehow snuck in items and eluded all of the other Wal-Mart employees that would have seen me from the self-check out area all the way to the other side of the store. If that ever happens to me again, in any store in where receipt showing is not routine, I'll say to only show my receipt to them at the line for returns, and then vow to never again visit their location. Is this a fair response? I was wearing gym clothes, but I didn't look sloppy. I don't see why I would be singled out without any probable cause, but the assumption by the worker that I inherently would think to steal $7 worth of items, based on thin air. I work and have a clean criminal record. Unless that employee asks every single person who walks out that door to show their receipt, how is it not discrimination? Do I have any grounds to complain to a manager? I'd like to know that specific chain's policy. It's one way or the other. Either it makes sense they should ask all people to show their receipts, or they should ask nobody, unless there is actual probable cause other than some kind of random stereotype pulled out of that greeter's ass.
I'm sorry you did not like my answer but these are the times we live in.
My wife and I grocer shop at Giant. We use their hand held scanners as we go through the aisles to scan our purchases. At the self check out we and others are randomly selected, for the same reason the security person gave you. To have our purchases checked to insure what is in the bag(s) is what we scanned. They employee picks 7 items to check against the receipt. Frankly it is no big deal.
To say you don't care if people steal; that the store can afford it because they don't pay a living wage is wrong. One has nothing to do with the other. Inventory loss goes directly to pricing. Employee salary is related to sales but not contingent on inventory control. I agree Wal-Mart should pay their employees a living wage. since they do not I do not shop there.
I assure you that you were not discriminated against based for any reason other than you fit a profile they use to catch people who steal from them. You did nothing wrong but the security person could not possibly know that without checking. This is how things are in our times and it will get worse before it gets better.
I wear a device for pain that sets off the alarms store have when you walk out with merchandise that has not been scanned. I know the stores where it happens. I tell the clerks in advance. Still we are stopped and a clerk or guard must walk our purchase through the exit. Should I get upset? No it only takes a few seconds for them to satisfy themselves and we are on are way. Big deal. I need the device in order to function, it my cross to bear.
I cannot answer your question specifically. What I can tell you is that inventory shrinkage, a nice way of saying theft. Is a retail store's biggest problem.
Were you singled out. Probably but your were most likely not discriminated against because of the color of your skin or how you were dressed. The employee who stopped you most likely was a Wal-Mart security person. He most likely spotted you walking across the store rather than exiting at the exit from the cash registers. Regardless of your intentions this fits the profile of someone who may want to, shall we say take a five finger discount now that they have a shopping bag to stuff it into.
While you may not have had any intention of doing so his job is to make sure the store did not lose any merchandise. The only way for him to do so was to stop you and politely ask to see a sales receipt. When you asked why if he explained in a polite and civil manner and then thanked you when you produced the receipt. Then he has done his job and you have nothing to complain about. It would be the same as any police officer stopping you on the street because your car matched the description of one used in a crime.
As long as he was polite, did not detain you any longer than it took to check the items against the receipt, answered questions politely and then thanked you. You really have nothing to complain about. You really should thank him for being on the ball for if he wasn't and someone did make it out of the store with unpaid merchandise. The cost of those thefts are reflected in future purchases made by you, me and anyone else as they get added into pricing of all merchandise as the cost of doing nosiness.
I'm 27 years old and I've been a member of the same church since I was born. I never really considered changing churches until a couple of years ago, but even then I keep thinking I'm gonna move soon, so I figured that there was no point.
Until a couple of years ago, we'd had the same pastor all of my life. We called him Brother Don and he was wonderful. He was a good pastor and although he didn't condone certain things, he taught us not to judge or condemn people who did those things. He loved all of us and he taught us to love each other and love everyone else we come in contact with as well. He treated everyone in the church like family and he gave awesome sermons.
When he left, we had another pastor come for a little while and then had a permanent pastor this past summer. We call him pastor Jason and I don't like saying this about him, but I don't think that he's a very good pastor.
It's hard for me to say these things without sounding judgmental of him and I acknowledge that, but he seems judgmental of others. He doesn't really teach unconditional love, but rather loving only people who go to your church or would be willing to go to your church. Perhaps I'm mistaken about that, but it seems like that's what he was saying. He also seems to like to judge others for the bad things they do.
He doesn't give good sermons and sometimes I feel like we hear more about his oldest son than we hear about God. Brother Don has four children and loves them as much as anyone loves their children, but he didn't talk about them much because he wanted to stay on subject and not tell a story about them unless it applied to the sermon. Jason FORCES stories about his oldest son into the sermon and if he doesn't have one, he just tells one for fun. I know people like to talk about their kids, but when your a pastor and spend most of your sermons talking about them, that's not good. Also it's always JUST his oldest son, never his other two kids and he makes it clear that his oldest is his favorite.. He says it's because his oldest son is adopted and the other two are biological, so he got to choose his oldest, but got stuck with his other two. This makes me wonder more about his character.
I love him and love everyone in the church, but I don't agree with most of them on a lot of things. For instance, this new friend of mine named Dave just came into my life. He happens to be an atheist, so as I Christian, I worry about him, but I love him. I want to be his friend, but so many people in our church hate atheists. They dehumanize them and judge them as being horrible people. They judge me for having anything to do with them and tell me that Christians shouldn't do that. They do the same with my gay friend, John and my jewish friend Spencer. I want to love everyone the way Jesus did, but the church doesn't seem to agree that we should,
So my question is should I feel bad for wanting to change churches?
NO you have every right to worship wear you feel welcome and feel comfortable. A bad analogy I can offer is; If I don't like a movie I get up and leave. Just because I paid to see the movies is no reason to sit through a bad one. In a similar reasoning if you are uncomfortable with the Pastor of your church get up and find a new church.
Leaving this church and finding a new one is a quick self-correcting action for yourself. What about those left behind. If others feel as you do then leaving is the wrong solution. The proper thing to do is to work within the church to get a replacement for this Pastor. If you are the only one to feel this way then of course the right thing to do is to find a new church you are more comfortable in.
Hi everyone! 13/f
So I am a soccer player who does approximately 4-5 hours of intense running. I have started to go throw my growth spurt and going shopper for larger sizes when I relized I have way larger thighs than most girls. I have very little fat in that area and a ton of muscle which is good in way, but girls where I live don't have big thighs. I can't stop running and do other exercises to tone my muscles BC I am on a team, but I don't want to look bigger than all my friends, especially since I'll be wearing shorts soon. Plz don't say that I shouldn't try to change my body and that puberty will fix everything. The truth is that if you don't look a certain way, people look at you differently and great you differently. I can't change that. What can I do to fix my issue? Thank you.
You have big thighs because you play soccer and you have well developed thigh muscles because of it. This is not something puberty will fix. As long as you exercise in this manner you will continue to have big thigh muscles.
What you can do is to dress in a manner as to not draw attention to your thighs. Were longer shorts instead of short shorts. Your shorts should be loose fitting around your thighs instead of tight fitting. There is nothing wrong with this look if you wear the right blouses and polo shirts to keep peoples eyes looking at all of you and not just your thighs. Hair style is also important in how you look.
What you really want, especially as you get older is for boys especially, to look at your beautiful face and eyes. as the saying goes our eyes are the pathway to our sole. A proper hairstyle will help draw a boys eyes upward to your face. Also remember if mom allows you to wear makeup. A little bit goes much further than a lot of makeup. When it comes to makeup less is more.
You are just entering your teenage years a wonderful time in your life that only comes around once. Try not to focus on your body but focus on all of you. This is a time to have fun, to grow and to enjoy more freedom and to prepare to enter the adult world. Don't spoil it by focusing on just one thing.
My wife recently told me that her feelings for me aren’t there anymore, and while she loves me, she doesn’t love me like she used to. In a follow-up conversation, she let me know that she has feelings for a much older coworker of hers (16 year age difference). She says nothing has happened with him, but she’s confused with her feelings at the moment and doesn’t know what to do.
While heartbroken, I feel like this could have been much worse. And I’m struggling with what I can do or say to her to make her keep her commitment to me. She has said that none of this was my fault, but I’m sure he’s giving her more attention and communication than I was (we had gotten to the “comfortable” stage).
Obviously I can’t force her to love me, but I’m struggling to come up with rational ways to verbalize why she should stay. Can anybody give me advice on what I could say? What I’m trying to get at is yes, I understand that a new person can be exciting and fun, but we have already built the foundation to make a marriage go the distance.
I'm sorry you find yourself at such a point in your marriage. My feeling is that before you can do anything about this you need to find out where the love was lost. To do so I suggest marriage counseling. If either one of you have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) at work contact them for assistance in finding a marriage counselor. Generally the EAP program will pay for several of the visits.
Once you find out where the problem is then you can take steps to correct it. Given your age it could very well be that you just married to young. If this is the case a marriage counselor can be a big help to both of you.
If there is something that caused her to lose her love for you then you can take steps to rekindle that love. To try and do this without knowing the how or why would be similar to flying a 747 by the seat of your pants. It can't be done.
Ask your wife to go to marriage counseling with you. Is she still does love you as she says she does she will do this with you.
If i had sex in ass but my sperm have reached her vagina can she be pregnant?
It is almost impossible for sperm to leak out of your butt hole and into your vagina. Even if it did the sperm would most likely be dead as the anal cavity is filled with bacteria that would kill off the sperm.
Suggestion: If you were to engage in anal sex the bacterial I spoke of above is also dangerous for the male as it can cause any number of urinary problems for him. IF you do engage in anal intercourse he should use a condom and when done he should wash his groin area and penis with warm soapy water.
Anal sex is an alternative to vaginal sex and you cannot get pregnant from anal sex. While many couples enjoy anal sex as a safe way not to become pregnant. Safe sex practices should still be followed.
After a lot of baby name searching, your brain gets foggy. Are these names that we chose for our twins normal?
Boy: Dean Harvey
Girl: Spencer Guin
When it comes to children the most important factor to remember is first and foremost they are your children. Yours and their fathers, you are the ones who get to name them and raise them. If you ask others for suggestions on names or if they like the names you have chosen you will go nuts for you will never satisfy everyone.
The names you have chosen to my mind are great names. The one middle name is unique and as the child gets older he may want to know why you chose it. Fact is though few if any people ever call anyone by their middle name. You will use it when you want to get his attention, all parents do . It tells them they are most likely in trouble and they better snap too.
Congratulations on the coming birth of your twins. You have chosen some great names. Relax and enjoy your children.
Is it possible to get pregnant when he comes in the condom but it isn't broken or anything?
IF the condom is worn correctly, meaning completely covering the penis and the reservoir is hanging out. Then condoms are statistically 85% effective. The statistics take into account condoms not worn correctly, condoms that are out of date and ones that break for other reasons.
Birth control pills are almost 99% effective and when condoms are used in conjunction, which if safe sex is practices should be. Combined the two are statistically almost 100% effective.
I had unprotected sex with my boyfriend about two months ago. When it was time for my period to come a few weeks later, it was a day late and not as heavy as it usually was. But I didn't worry about it because I still had a period. Keep in mind I am on birth control. I don't take it at the same time everyday but I do take it everyday. So now it's month #2, time for Mother Nature. I am two days late and have barely spotted. Could this mean that I am pregnant or does this sometimes happen? I have been on the pill for 5 years now and my menstrual cycle is always like clockwork. Please someone advise me on what could be going on. Thank you in advance!
I don't think your pregnant. Stress over if you could be pregnant will affect your menstrual cycle. In fact more women miss periods over stress than actually being pregnant. Any type of stress can cause a women to miss a period. Being sick, taking antibiotics or even some over the counter medications can throw of a woman's menstrual cycle.
I suggest you do the following mostly to help yourself relax, not that I think you are pregnant. Purchase a reliable home test kit. Ask the pharmacist which one they think is the best or most reliable. Then go home and follow the instructions. If by chance it is positive wait 10 days and test again. False positive are more prone than false negatives.
As for taking your birth control medication. It should be taken every day at the same time. Maybe not at the same clock hour but at the same time each day such as when you get up or when you finish breakfast.
I suffer from a chronic condition which requires medication be taken each day. If I tried to take it by the clock it would be impossible so I take it at breakfast, lunch after dinner and before bed. This has worked fine for me and is well within the window of the medication schedule. Try and do the same with your birth control. I suggest you take it in the morning with breakfast as it is the easiest time of day to remember.
I really do not think your pregnant that stress is the problem so try to relax.
Hi, I have recently come across this website that basically has a bunch of young girls (all 17 or under) in pictures in their underwear or short shorts or pictures showing off their butts. None nude but some are just in bras and underwear. I was wondering is this website legal? I'm guessing since the young girls aren't fully nude its not considered child pornography? Could someone please help me understand if this is legal to be on the internet/why it is allowed?
I'm not a lawyer or am I an expert on laws concerning pornography. I would say the reason it is legal to be on the Web is the same reason it is legal for the newspapers to print pictures of models wearing just under garments.
Many of the models used by ad agencies for bra and panty advertising range in age from 16 to about 19. These girls have the physical dimensions the manufacturers are looking for and appeal to the market they are targeting. Because they are fully clothed, meaning their breast and vaginas are covered, it is not pornography child or otherwise; I would believe.
There was a time not so long ago that newspapers would not run this type of ad. It was not that it was considered pornography but it was considered in bad taste and not to community standards.
Now if you go to Europe or other countries you would be surprised what you might see. There standards concerning nudity are much different than ours. Although not when it comes to child pornography that is a worldwide concern.
I hope this answers your question.
So I have been married to my husband for 6 years together for almost 10 years. It is safe to say him and I have more or less come to a mostly great way of living our lives together. We understand each others faults and know how to deal with them (for the most part). We discuss every problem we have thoroughly and are very open. I love him very much!
Now I haven't had a really good friend who is female in a very long time. Now I started to feel a very strong connection with a girl and I considered her my best friend. She is 19 and is fairly naive (not to mention she broke up with her manipulative boyfriend a few months ago). She has also been very good friends with my husband to the point where he would consider her his best friend to.
Her and my husband have started to have a hard time communicating lately. It often seems like she is hostile to him. There is a reason that she started acting this way but that is too long a story. One day she starts in on me about how he is manipulating me into certain things and frankly insulted his fathering skills (we have two children). She said she is my best friend and can see that he is hurting me because she lives with us (before this altercation she wasn't home at all that week). I looked at her and calmly said she was judging our relationship and I did not appreciate it. She said she didn't think she was. She learned her lesson that her opinion was not necessary. I told her that I have been with him for ten years and I don't think I should have to defend our relationship to her especially when she really knows very little about us. I have dealt with defending this relationship to my whole family and my past best friend. I got to the point with my ex best friend that I could no longer defend my relationship to her and things were never the same. I thought she knew us a lot better than she showed me that day and that kinda crushed me. I learned I cant talk to anyone in depth about my feelings with anyone but my husband because they will all end up judging us in the end.
So here is the real problem. Ever since this occurred I have had horrible anxiety and depression off and on. I have determined I am having these issues because I am scared not only of her judging me but that everyone around me is also judging me. I have been having problems not being confident in my relationship with my husband. I have been feeling like we aren't communicating well right now. Like I am seeing those little things I have grown to live with and sometimes to love in him. She screwed with my confidence and I am often scared to talk in front of others...scared to be judged or that I will say something stupid. I am trying very hard to not feel and act this way and sometimes it works but I am sick of this pain in my chest from the anxiety and sick of double guessing things I say and do. Please help me fix this before I have to kick her out of my house for bringing me so much negativity.
First: Get that child-women out of your house. She is not only ungrateful she is toxic to your relationship with your husband.
Second: I do see the need for therapy but only to find out why or what other people see in your relationship with your husband you do not. If you are truly happy in your relationship that is one thing. But it sounds a bit as is you have accustomed yourself to living by his set of rules or standards. This is not fine. Marriage is a 50/50 deal. Each gives some to each other and learns to live together and when children come along they work as a team.
I am not saying anything is wrong in your marriage. In my marriage my wife is my best friend and as much as I ask her not to she always will put me first unless it has something to do with our son. Then he comes first and that is the way it should be or at least it is how I feel it should be.
If your husband is working and his company supplies health insurance. It is a good bet they also have an EAP program, Employee Assistance Program. This offers help with a variety of problems one of which is free therapy sessions, the number varies by program. Call the human resource department of your husbands company and get the number for the EAP line. Then call them and ask for a number for a psychologist in your area that works with them.
You probably only need a few sessions with the psychologist to get these thoughts that have crept into your mind resolved. Once properly resolved life can return to normal for you and your husband.
The visits are usually free and what is said in therapy is totally confidential. No one but you and the therapist will ever know what has been said. There is no reason to be depressed or to question yourself if there is help available. Check to see if your husbands, or your company if you work outside your home, offers and EAP program.
I used to work at a child care facility before it closed down in June 2011. When we closed, I took a lot of paperwork and file info with me. Just yesterday, I was cleaning out some of that old info and found an envelope marked "lunch money refund" for a particular family with $32 in it.
I'm not sure of whether or not I can even reach these people.
If I cannot contact them, what do you think would be the "right thing" to do with the cash?
In the grand scheme of things $32 is not that large a sum of money. Still if it belongs to someone else it is always best to try and get it back to them as legally it is not yours.
If you have tried and failed the right thing to do is to take the money and the information you have to your local police department. They may or may not accept such a small amount to try and trace the owners for. If so the money is then legally your.
If they do accept the money and are unable to trace the owners or the owners do not pick up the funds in a specified period of time. Then again the money becomes legally yours.
I know that Prazosin is used for PTDS and assorted anxiety disorders. Are there any herbs or supplements that can offer similar benefits?
FYI - I currently take Prozac for OCD.
There may be and if you want to try them I suggest you find a doctor who practices Holistic medicine. Buying these Herbal alternatives over the counter without the knowledge of how they might react with other medications you are taking can be dangerous. Also certain Herbal supplements are not as effective as the manufactured drug and may have side effects worse than the manufacturer's drug,
Herbal supplements and herbal medications are not covered by your prescription drug benefits. These supplements or medications can be expensive. While I might understand why you wish to change to a more natural medication. This is one time due diligence is called for before you take any action.
My life has simply gone from bad to worse. Not in a dramatic sort of way, but gradually. I'm a freshman college girl with no idea as to what she is going to do with her future; this has me stressing over what to do - you see I change my mind about nearly everything from one day, to the next. Today I want to be a vet, but tomorrow I want to be a writer, then the next day I want to be a marine biologist, etc, etc. My parents owe a restaurant to which I am supposed to be “comitted" to, but I don't want to. This makes me feel selfish and irresponsible, plus lazy. I don't like being a waitress and the emotional stress one goes through sometimes is not a joke. My sleeping pattern is f***d up, seeing as how I go to sleep super late (think 3-5am) and wake up at 6:00am to go to class at 7:30, then sleep during the day. I don't go out much which isolates me slightly. I get extremely jealous of my roommate who has been friends with me since 7th grade - she's organized, smart, pretty, funny, social, kind, has a lot of experience in traveling, has worked for important people and attracts guys much better than me. Everything I'm not. The reason why I get hostile feelings towards her is because she reminds me of this everytime I see her. I'm shy, not good at much, get distracted easily, never finish things I start, I forget things easily, I can be dependable, I have the body of a thirteen year old boy, and seem to fail at nearly everything I do. Im fed up with my life and sometimes feel trapped. But these feelings are temporary - they come and go. Sometimes, I get so fed up, that thoughts of not continuing do pass my mind. I feel like nobody needs me and that I'm worthless in more ways than one. I mean I do nothing of importance, I don't help people, so why stay? I just... feel like I'm falling in a hole and I only seem to sink further in, not crawl out.
TO start with it sounds as if you have several things going on here. First some of what your wrote sounds like depression. This would be normal for a freshman to suffer with a bit of clinical depression. You have a bit of homesickness and then add to that the rigors of college and it is easy enough to fall into a depressive state. The fact that you are not sleeping adds to the depression as well as causing problems related to sleep deprivation and being out of sync with the rest of the world.
You also have a problem related to self-esteem. You say you have the body of a 13 year old boy. This tells me you believe your flat chested. There are a lot of guys out there that happen to like small breasted women and there are ways to dress that actually highlight that fact in a very stunning way. Your also old enough to enhance your breast size if you want. My advice is not to for if not done properly you will hate the results.
What I suggest is as follows. Go to the campus health center and see a doctor and asked to be screened for depression. It is painless and the doctor will also perform a physical to rule out any other cause for how you are feeling. Everything you have written about goes directly back to what I know are symptoms of depression and sleep deprivation. In your case the two are a circular fix one and the other will be corrected. Once the two main problems are correct your concentration will come back, you will feel better about yourself and you will be able to concentrate and complete projects on time.
As for being lost, not knowing what you want. That is fairly normal for a freshman which is why you do not have to declare a major until the end of next year. What you can do is go to your class advisor and ask for help in finding out just what you are best suited for. There are tests you can take that will point you in a direction that you will very likely be thinking of or be very comfortable with.
As far as joining the family business goes. You are a young adult now and you will be a more mature adult when you graduate. If the family business is not your idea of how you want to spend the rest of your life. Then don't go back to it.
Every parent who builds a business does so thinking they are building something for their children's future and there's well. Not every child is cut out to join the family business and shouldn't. If it is a good business mom and dad can sell it when they are ready to retire. There is no law that say a child must take over the family business and operate it in their parents retirement for them.
My advice here is to let your parents know you will not be returning after college to work in their business and to learn to operate it. start telling them this now so it does not come as a surprise to them when you graduate.
Most important is my advice to see a doctor and be screened for depression for I feel if you are suffering with depression. Getting control of that will solve most all of the other problems you write about.
Hi I'm a thirteen year old girl and for the past 3 years or so, I've been getting yellowy, sticky stuff in my underwear. It wasn't too bad at first but recently it's been getting quite bad - as in a lot - and I'm starting to get worried. I had my first period last summer and haven't had another since. I'm a little bit worried. What if my friends see a little bit and think it's pee when we change for P.E? That would be so embarrassing! Please help. Am I normal like this?
Hi. This is probably not something to be too worried about as you are in the early stages of puberty. It is something that you should discuss with your mother so she can decide if you should see a doctor or not. Since you are in the early stages of puberty this is the time for you to have your first female examination by a Gynecologist (GYN).
There are some diseases, non-sexual, that know no age limits that require yearly GYN exams. Cancers of the reproductive system being one of them. What you’re experiencing does not lead me to believe you are anywhere near having that type of problem .I am just pointing out why it is important to have regular GYN exams now that you are a young lady.
Problems such as this I know are embarrassing and you fear the first question mom will ask if you go to her with a Question like this is. Have you been having sex? Maybe mom will or will not ask you that. You can head that question off by simply satiating in the beginning to mom something like, mom I'm still a virgin, or mom I am not sexually active, and I need to ask you a question."
You’re asking a question her to total strangers who are not doctors and cannot give out medical advice or diagnoses. Maybe one of the young ladies on here has had something similar to what you are experiencing. That does not mean it is the same thing as you are experiencing.
When you are having female problems such as this one your best resource is you mom. She knows you best and you are wearing her genes so it is likely she experienced what you are at your age. Mom will know if you need to see a doctor or not. Remember you and mom are built exactly alike reproductive so there is no reason to be embarrassed to go to her. This is not a question about sex but the health of your reproductive system which is also not sex.
IF you had a sore throat or a stomach ache you would go to mom for help. This is no different. So please talk to mom and let her decide if you need to see a doctor about this. Also talk to her about seeing a GYN for your first female exam if you have not already had one.
I served in the army for 10 years as a REME Armourer. By the time I left, I had become a class 1 Armourer, responsible for the inspection, repair, maintenance and servicing of all small arms and pistols, machine guns, mortars, Milan missile sytem, warrior turrets and 30mm rarden cannon.
I hoped to work as a gunsmith but was told, all my qualifications and experience was not recognised as a civilian gunsmith. I have searched on line for courses to take, to become qualified, but there are none in Uk. Is the information I was given true, my experience in the repair and maintenance of all these different weapons count for nothing? If so, where can I get the qualifications to be recognised? Why are military qualifications not recognised? I would like to see a civilian gunsmith repair a weapon whilst being shot at in a very hot country and then after the repair is complete, return to being a soldier
Most likely there is a license required to be a gunsmith or some form of certification certificate. You most likely have the hands on qualifications required just absent the piece of paper you need to work as a gunsmith.
What I would suggest are as follows.
1) Contact the department of licensing to see what license is required. If one is required they may be able to furnish you with a list of schools that upon completion of the course can issue the certificate or license.
When you contact any of these schools tell them of your qualifications and if you have any certificates of training from the military show them to the admissions officer. Ask if it is possible for you to just test through the course to obtain your license.
2) If a license is required and the department of licensing can licensing cannot or will not recommend any schools. Use search engines asking to display "Gunsmith Schools." When you contact these Schools I against advice you ask if it is possible to test out based on your military experience.
3) Not living in the UK I am not sure if they have a Veterans Administration. I believe they do or something similar to that which we have here in the states. If so they would have someone to help with education, educational benefits and job placement. Contact this department and ask them for help with finding out what you need to be a gunsmith and getting credit for what you learned in the Military.