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about
My name's Jennifer, but I'm more commonly known as Jen or Sporkster. I love lots of things/people including God; volleyball and soccer, my two favorite sports; and cheese. I also love Pi, but that's a story for another day.
I've been answering questions on Advicenators for over three years now, so I'm pretty experienced with it. I love answering questions and helping you out anyway I can, so if you've got a question, just ask me!
Ask me about: Christianity, athletics, physical fitness, love-life, relationships, friendships, HTML queries, book suggestions, music suggestions, musical theory, history, English (or Spanish) grammar, Paint Shop Pro 8, skin problems, sports injuries, "punk" fashion, nutrition, etc.
advice
Q: Well okay, I've seen my boyfriend twice in my whole life. I met him like 2-3 weeks ago. And then we met up again at some fireworks like a week ago. He asked me out there. I didn't wanna say no though because like I was like hmm what the heck, Ill give him a chance. So the day after he asked me out. He went away for two weeks*he comes back this coming Sunday* and he calls like 3 times a day. He kinda gets annoying though and everyboy that knows him thinks he's annoying too. Also he is a jerk at times. Like he'll make fun of me and my music and stuff. But i noticed he has a really sweet side underneath it all. No one else knows about this sweet side of his. So when I tell them, they think im crazy. Another thing is that he cant even say "I love you!" When he says it, it just doesn't sound like he means it. Well.. i guess I love him, but it's just hard ya know? I have no clue what to do. So please help.
P.s. To add on to this all, he's friends with my x-bf and my x-bf wants us all to hang out but whenever me and my x are together we're all like close and kinda act like we're goin out. because I love him still *he broke up with me because I kinda cut because of him* and he apologized for it and said it was a mistake. But it's kinda late now.. i dont knwow.... we're all gonna hang out when my bf comes back. But im afraid its gonna be weird. Please help me.
Sorry this is sooo effin' longg.
A: Um, you only met him twice before he asked you out, and you agreed to it? You can't really except that much of a romantic relationship at first, because you really need to be friends before moving on. That way you know each other at least a little bit, etc.
If he's calling you too much, just be honest with him and tell him you'd rather he called just once. Tell him if he's annoying you, because that's the only way he'll know. He may be just teasing about your music--guys like to do that. People think my boyfriend is weird/goth/etc., but he's not. He's sweet, but they just don't know him.
As for not saying "I love you", why would you want him to feel forced to say that? Honestly, saying "I love you" without meaning it isn't good at all. Good guys don't say "I love you" unless they mean it. Don't feel offended--they only do that because they really don't want to hurt your feelings. And if you've only met him twice or so, I really don't think you can love him at this point in your relationship. What's your definition of real love?
And if you have feelings for your ex boyfriend, why are you going out with someone else? Does your ex boyfriend have a girlfriend? If not, maybe you should leave this new guy and go back to a guy you still have feelings for. Let's try not to make our lives confusing/dramatic, okie dokies?
If you feel weird being around your ex with your new boyfriend, that's perfectly normal. But if when you're around your ex you act like you're still going out, you probably should be going out.
You could ask me personally via a private question, email, or AIM and I'd be glad to help you out.
Q: Can someone pelase tell me this?
On a site, they are asking for people who have expeience in HTML and FTP
can someone tell me what thta is
thanks
A: First off, if you don't know what HTML and FTP are, I wouldn't try to get that position.
HTML is an acronymn for Hyper(t)ext Markup Language.
It's just a language used by many people to code simple websites. You can do lots of things with HTML such as making tables (like the ones you use in your advice column's layout); bold, italicize, underline, or strikethrough your text; create (hyper)links to other webpages; create ordered lists, etc. It's really easy to learn, which is why so many people use it to code their webpages. A few websites you could visit are
http://www.lissaexplains.com*
http://www.peachie.nu
A couple good HTML books include:
The Advanced HTML Companion, Keith
Schengili-Roberts. AP Professional, 1997.
Effective Web Design (2nd. ed.), Ann Navarro.
Sybex Inc., 2001.**
FTP, I believe, stands for file transfer protocol. This is a simple file-transfering program that allows you to upload files to a webserver without having to be on that site. CuteFTP is a really easy program to use--you try it out for free by going here:
http://www.cuteftp.com/downloads/cuteftp.asp
You can find FTP tutorials practically anywhere. Just type "FTP beginners tutorials" in any search engine, and you'll get plenty of results.
Feel free to email me or ask me any additional questions you may have. I'll be glad to answer them. :)
Q: Okay....I would really like to know how John 5:19-47 contradicts God not being a triune God. I would also like to know what other verses sway this thinking in you.
A: Oh deary me. Sorry about that, I only meant to type John 5:19. Once again, sorry.
In the verse, Jesus says "The Son can do nothing of Himself, but what he seeth the Father do: for what things soever he doeth, these also doeth the Son likewise" (John 5:19) Jesus is saying, "I can't do just anything I want to, God is directing me. I watch what God does, and I do it. I want to be a being after God's heart."
Think of it this way. You have a father, right? Of course you do, everyone does. That makes you his son/daughter. You share some of the same genes, maybe you even look alike, but are you the same person? No. In this way, Jesus is a Son to God. He has the same Godly characteristics, and wants to do the will of God. He watches God, observes what He does, and seeks to do likewise. However, Jesus had a beginning, and God has always been. God created Jesus (I believe that Jesus may have been an archangel of some sort before coming to earth, but that's just my belief), whereas God is an infinite Being. Always has been, always is, and always will be. That's why He told Moses to tell the Hebrews, "I am." Am is the state of being verb that means just to exist, to be.
Many argue in favor of the Trinity because God can do anything He wants to, including to exist in a triune Being. But if He did exist in three persons, wouldn't they all be equal? How would the Son watch what God does to be able to do it, have lesser power than God, yet still be equal to God? He couldn't. If he could it would be an inequality, or untruth, and God can't lie. God is perfect, without sin. So explain how Jesus can be lesser than God and equal to God at the same time.
Another well-known passage is John 3:16-17. "For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. 17. For God sent not his Son into the world to condemn the world; but that the world through him might be saved." So, if you believe in the Trinity, this verse means that God sent his Son to earth to die for us, but his Son was really himself, and he was a human and God at the same time but they were of equal and lesser power at the same time too. Does that make sense to you at all?
There's so many other things that point to the Trinity being just church doctrine (the whole St. Patrick and the Druids escapade), but that's all I can bear to type right now. It's extremely late and I'm extremely tired AND I'm pretty out of it. Just email me (sporkstergirlATyahooDOTcom) and I'll retype this and explain it to you better if you want me to.
Sorry for any weirdness that might've occured due to my extreme exhaustion.
Q: what is the difference between being christian and catholic?
A: Catholicism is basically a church denomination of Christianity, which is the main religion that Catholics, Protestants, Baptists, Lutherans, Methodists, Presbyterians, etc. believe. I personally don't believe in organized religion (I believe in the Bible alone), but many people do, and that's fine.
Christianity is the belief that Jesus Christ was God's only Son, born of a virgin, and sent to save the world from sin and eternal death. Christians follow the New Testament of God and Jesus's teachings. Some denominations of Christianity (such as Catholics and Baptists) have their own church doctrines that they believe in, but that's another story for right now.
Catholicism, on the other hand, has roots in Rome (the religion was started by the Roman emporer Constantine). Catholics generally believe the same things that non-denominational Christians do, except they put alot of emphasis on Mary (the Virgin Mary) and the Apostles, Saints, etc., when the Bible says to worship God and God alone. They also believe in the Divine Trinity, which is the belief that God, the Son, and the Holy Spirit are the same Supreme Being. I personally do not believe in the Trinity because of numerous verses contradicting this belief (see John 5:19-47), but that's just me. Catholics also consider the Pope the "Father", when Jesus clearly states that you call no one "Father" but THE Father, God. There's plenty of other things that Catholics believe in, but those are some of the major beliefs.
If you'd like to ask any more questions about Christianity or Catholicism, feel free to email me or IM me via AIM.
I hope my advice answers your question, but if it doesn't, try Google. :)
Q: my older sister is 15 and i am 13, and i can't stand her! like she just bugs the hell out of me. she tries to be like her "own person", she is obsessed with animals, mostly horses, and reading. but i am the exact opposite, i hate reading and i like partying, boys, music, and tennis. she is trying to act like me though. i mean she likes country music, and i like rap hip hop and r& b. now she is starting to like maroon 5 and stuff that i like it is pissing me off and its just cause she is trying to be cool because she knows she is really annoying. and my mom is making me spend the day with her at the pool tomorrow, which i really don't want to do because there are only 2 days until i go to camp and i would rather spend my time with my friends! how do i get out of it?!?! please help me!
A: So, you hate your sister because she likes stuff that you don't like? Wow, that makes alot of sense. Maroon 5 isn't exactly rap, hip-hop, or r&b, so why are you so pissed off because she likes them? Maybe she really does? Gosh, I can't BELIEVE she would actually like a group that you like--how dare she like a group that only YOU can like! /sarcasm
My advice, first of all, is to just get over it. People have different interests for a reason. This world would be extremely dull if everybody liked the same things. Difference is what makes the world beautiful.
If you don't want to go to the pool, just tell your mom you don't want to. It's not that hard. If she still makes you go, ask her if you could invite your friends to go too. That way you can spend time with your friends and still be doing what your mom wants you to. Compromise is a beautiful thing.
Please try to get along with your sister. It'll make your life a whole lot easier.
- Sporkster
Q: Hello all!
I started a relationship with a man that I'm mentally fascinated with. He is well educated and very articulate, which is what attracted me to him. We were together for about a month when I busted him cheating. Now, two months later, I have told him I forgive him and still want a relationship with him but he is lukewarm. He "says" that he doesn't know what to do/say to make things better between us, but I've told him countless times that I'm not worried about him cheating on me again. His response, "Nothing is certain but death and taxes." My brain tells me that if he could say that to me, he doesn't care about making things right. My heart tells me that he's a good man and he won't do it again. Am I dilusional??? The Bible teaches us to forgive 70 times 70, but that doesn't mean I have to be with him still right? I'm in love with this man but I don't know if I can ever trust him again. Please help!
A: When the Bible says forgive him, it doesn't say that you have to stay with him no matter what. You have to be able to trust your boyfriend under every circumstance, no matter what. If he told you that he promised he would never cheat on you again, and made an effort to try to make things better, then I would definitely seek a better relationship with him. But since he has said, "Nothing is certain but death and taxes," like you, I don't really think he wants to try to make things right. If he's like that, then there's really no point in continuing to date him. He doesn't feel remorse for what he did and will continue to do what he did without regret.
I honestly hope that he's being truthful with you and that you two will sort things out and have a wonderful relationship.
As always, feel free to ask me personally any questions you may have.
Q: I would like some advice on what to look for in a decent, used Laptop computer. I'm looking to use this for internet use, Word programs etc, and pretty light on the game play with a CD Rom and floppy. What is the price range I'm looking at for something very decent but also not new, because I only have about $350 max to work with.
Is it lame of me to think to find a good laptop on ebay?
If I try to find one on ebay, what specs should I look for? I'm not up on what RAM, ROM, is considered 'good', or anything about internet cards.
I was also told that laptops are basically useless, and that if I want a personal computer I should just get a desktop one. How true is this?
Is my search hopeless?
Thanks a lot to anyone who will help.
A: You'd be better of getting a desktop. Laptops generally aren't as powerful as desktop PC's, and typically are a pain in the ass to use (In my opinion, anyway...stupid laptop keyboards...).
If you're not going to be doing alot of traveling for business or whatever, I definitely recommend getting a desktop PC. They've got more gaming power, more space, and most are quite user friendly.
As MFS said, Dell sells good quality computers pretty cheap, so I'd defintely check them out. Their laptops are relatively cheap too.
If you're just stuck on getting a laptop, try eBay. Make sure it's from a reliable seller (check their feedback) and research exactly what they're selling to prevent buying a piece of shit.
I hope this advice helps you in your search for a computer.
Q: I'm 16, and I don't want a relationship right now because I just got out of a really long one and I'm enjoying being single. But now that I am single it seems that every guy is wanting to date me and I just want to be friends. I'm usually the type of person that takes things fast with guys, but I'm trying to change my priorities and try and become friends before the whole dating thing. But every guy that wants to get with me takes it the wrong way when I say, "I just want to stay single right now because I've gotten out of a long relationship and I'd rather be friends right now." After that they act really cool with the idea but after a couple weeks they stop talking to me, and then the next time I see them they get shitty with me because they feel insulted that I don't want to date them. I want to keep my guy friends and stop worrying about losing them just because I don't feel like dating at this point in time. And I have no clue how to say this with out hurting anyone's feelings or making them think that I'm not interested. They all take it that I a m shooting them down, which I am not at all trying to do. Many of the guys I do kind of like, but I want to stay single until I truly feel ready to date someone and I will know when that is, because I don't want to jump into the next available relationship and have it end quickly. I want to take my time and find a guy that will treat me right. I'm only 16 so I have plenty of time to stay single and find the right guy. So please help me! Is there anyway I can explain to these guys how I am feeling without them getting pissed off and thinking I'm shooting them down with the whole "just friends" line?
A: As the people who have answered before me said, you need to tell them exactly why you only want to be friends right now. Say something like, "I know you're looking for a more romantic relationship, but I just got out of a really long one and I just want to enjoy my time as a single person. Don't take this the wrong way, I still do want to be friends! If you wait awhile, maybe it'll turn into something more." That way they'll have a better understanding of why you want to stay "just friends". Make sure you tell them about the quote, "Love is friendship set on fire"--maybe that'll encourage them to keep your friendship going. I hope you have good luck with your guy friends, and when you feel ready, a great relationship!
Feel free to ask me any additional questions!
Q: AHHHHHHHHHH help pleease i put on that fake tanner crap yesterday and today it looks so gross it's all blotchy and stuff so is there anything taht i can use to take it off or not make it as noticeable! i dont want to ask my mom cause i wasn't suposed to use it without asking
thanks,
meagan
A: I advise using an exfoliating scrub to rub off the artificially pigmented top layer of dead skin. If you followed the directions right, most of the tanners highly recommend using an exfoliating scrub before using the tanner, so I hope you have some left over. Take the exfoliate, warm water, and a wash cloth, and gently rub off the tanner. It should come off or fade pretty easily.
I hope this advice helps you.
If not, I suggest http://www.google.com
Q: ok well yes. i know, its a girl question, but im not sure about it. I have a had my period for about 9 months, but this month it hasnt came it was due on the 21st, but it still isnt here, i have never ever had sex. and i dont know what to do! please please tell me its goin to be okay...i dont need to be pregnet at 14...
thanks
scared!
A: Ok, if you've never had sex, you can't be pregnant. So that's already marked out as a possibility.
If you've only had your period for nine months, chances are that it's not going to be regular for a while yet. Periods are bitchy little things--they always come early when you don't want them to and late when you need them to come early! Just relax--stress can prevent you from having your period. Give it a week or two more. If it still doesn't come, you may have just skipped a month.
Ask your mom about it, if you want to. I know I wouldn't, but maybe you would.
Don't worry about it! It's probably just fine.
Q: i usually dont have confidence issues like this, but i needed some help, lol.
i`m going to a new high school this year, with mostly new kids. i want to try out for the football cheerleading squad. tryouts are in late july. anyway, i don`t know why, but i`m having confidence issues about it. i`m not sure what they expect of us, i`m afraid i`ll screw it all up, and i`m afraid i`m going to embarrass myself since i haven`t done cheerleading in such a long time. should i just go for it, or forget it?
i`m also shy to tell my family and friends that I want to do it and i don`t know why because really looking at it its not a big deal. i can dance and stuff, but like i said i don`t know what they expect. ugh, can someone give me some guidance?
A: Well, going to a new high school has got to be a very stressful, anxiety-filled event for a teenager. New people, new "social expectations"(which you may not care for, but I know some people do), etc. All you have to do is have confidence in yourself! Make a few new friends at the tryouts, and I'm sure that'll take some of your anxiety away. Ask them for tips, tricks, etc. on how to be a better cheerleader. Go for it! If you want to do something, always always ALWAYS do it. If not, you might regret it.
Just tell your mom/dad/siblings that you want to try out and would like their support. I'm sure they'll support you all the way.
If you want tips and tricks for actual gymnastics type cheerleading, MsPineapple.com is great for that. They've also got forums for you to discuss other types of cheerleading (ex. dancing).
I hope my advice helps you.
If not, I suggest http://www.google.com
Q: Does any one know any skin products that actually work against acne?? and btw, is it true that eating chocolate gives you more break outs? does tanning really get rid of them?? And does thinking dirty thoughts give more zits?? or are all of these just myths?? Thank you bunces! Kisses/Mariana
A: Yes, quite a few products, actually. There's ProActiv, over-the-counter treatments, and prescription medicines for treating acne. If you're having skin problems, start out using an OTC treatment like Clearasil or Stridex. If those don't work or your condition doesn't improve, try ProActiv. This works for alot of people, but it doesn't work for some. If ProActiv doesn't work for you, go see a dermatologist.
The whole "eating chocolate makes you break out" thing is basically just a myth. I know that a few select people are effected by eating greasy, oily foods, but alot of people aren't.
Exposure to sun can help dry out your skin, but too much can make it worse. Just being outside an hour or two each day in the sun will help your skin's condition improve.
And thinking "dirty thoughts" has absolutely no effect on your skin condition whatsoever.
I hope my advice helped you.
If not, I suggest Google.
Q: Is it true that during basketball girls are supposed to run up stairs and walk down them?
A: Um...during what?
During a game? No, you run up and down the court.
During practice? Maybe, but you're not supposed to. Maybe it's just your instructor/coach/teacher?
The question isn't really clear, but if you write it over again and send it to me via my inbox or email address I may be able to help you better.
I hope my advice helps, but if it doesn't:
http://www.justfuckinggoogleit.com
Q: Do you loose your virginity if you use a tampon? like if it pops your hymen?
A: The simple answer is no. You lose your virginity once you have had sexual intercourse with a partner. Since a tampon is not a penis, you can't lose your virginity to it.
Also, the hymen may "pop" without you being aware. You can break it by competing in vigorous sports, horseback riding, cycling, etc. Some girls are born without a hymen.
I hope this answered your question.
If not,
http://www.justfuckinggoogleit.com
Q: I have a college induction day tomorrow, where they go through your subject choices and you get to meet people at the college... it's a private college (there was a test to get in and it costs alot to go there) and the dress for the day is "smart casual"... would it be okay to wear jeans? A pair that arn't ripped ect... lol I don't have trousers! But if it's not a good idea I can borrow something off my mum :S
What do you think?
16/f/UK
A: Well, since it's a private college, I would stick with the rule "better safe than sorry." You can always dress a little bit more than you need too--there's nothing wrong with that. But if you came in jeans and a shirt and other people were dressed in slacks/jackets/ties/etc., wouldn't you feel a bit out of place? I'd go with a nice combination of black dress shoes or sandals with black slacks, a cute white or pastel colored polo top, and a nice 'do. Wear a little bit of pretty pastel eyeshadow and a light lip gloss, and you're ready to go! Hope you have fun at your induction.
Best wishes,
Sporkster
Q: what are some good foods to take with you to eat in the car when your traveling?
Thanks
I rate 5 for good answers
A: Something that's easy to eat and won't make you sick/nauseated. Try stuff like little packets of peanuts, Ritz crackers, grapes, apple slices, a banana, etc. These are all quite good for you, and may actually help to prevent car sickness. Make sure you bring a good drink too: bottled water and Gatorade are my favorites. Sprite helps calm a sick stomach.
I hope this advice helps you.
If not,
http://www.justfuckinggoogleit.com
:)
Q: Why is it that a lot of the people on this one site called advicenators.com not know how to spell or correctly punctuate their sentences?
A: Because, quite frankly, there's alot of stupid people out there. That, and there are some people who just don't care. Sad, isn't it? Bad grammar makes me cry...
Q: does anyone know how much a power card from dave and busters cost
thanks
A: How about you try
http://www.justfuckinggoogleit.com/
Remember kids, Google is your friend.
Edit:
Oh, really? Because I just typed in "Dave & Busters's Inc." on Google and numerous different websites showed up. Maybe you're looking for this?
http://www.redflagdeals.com/deals/main.php/weblog/comments/17574/
Or the actual site?
http://www.daveandbusters.com/
Try searching the actual site for answers you want.
Really, is it that hard to look up something on Google? I searched for it ONCE and these showed up at the top of the list.
Q: OK. You guys explained to me how to read guitar tabs. Now there's only one thing left to ask.
High E-3---------------
B -0---------------
G -0--------------
D -0---------------
A -2---------------
Low E -3---------------
^
A: The dashes represent the strings on the guitar/bass, nothing more. If you've got guitar questions, I advise you go straight to MFS, as he seems to be the guy on Advicenators with the guitar know-how.
Q: I RATE 5s!!!
okk well i play volleyball at my summer camp and the thing is, i'm one of the worst players because it's a more "advanced" volleyball class. we're doing overhands and like everyone can get it..like i can do it but i'm not that good. i need some really good volleyball overhand advice on how to get it over the net. sometimes i hit it high enough but it's not far enough. sometimes i hit it far enough but it's not high enough, sooo yeah
and there's this one girl (a few others too every once in a while, but she's the worst!)..well she's pretty good at volleyball but she ALWAYS picks on me! not in the teasing way, in the bossing around way..like if i do one itsy-bitsy little thing wrong, she says "DO THIS, DO THAT!" and it becomes SO ANNOYING! i don't have the best temper so sometimes i stomp away after she's bossed me around like 20 times..how can i get her to stop? i'm sorry i'm not as good as the other people but she also has to realize i'm one of the youngest players there..i don't know what to do please help!!!
A: The secret to a good overhand serve is all in your toss. Make sure you toss it at just the right height that you can smack it with your flat palm as hard as you can. About a foot or so over your head is a good height. Just practice, practice, practice! Maybe even lift some weights to build up strength in your arms so you can hit it harder and farther.
Oh boy, believe me, I've been annoyed by my team captain many, many a time. My captain is an OK player, but she is definitely not the best. However, she thinks she is. So...yeah. All I can say is simply ignore her if it's something small or petty. If it's something big, think about whether what she's saying could help you improve your game. Don't let your temper get to you, because that'll only make things worse. And if you ignore her, over time she'll see that what she says has no effect on you and she'll just give up.
Have fun playing volleyball!