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I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
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advice
I brought my friend to church with me, becuase i talk about all these people, my "best friends" at church, so i wanted her to meet them. When we walk in, all of my "best friends ever" completly ignore us, even while im introducing them. It takes the friend that i brought to come up to me and say "did i do something wrong?!" before i completly loose it. I start crying and just break down. then, my "best friends" get all concerned, and even more concerned when i ignore them. what do you think i should do about them?
My guess is that your friends from church just felt a little awkward. They probably didn't ignore you more than they just felt like they should leave you alone with your other friend. They may even have been a little jealous. I think that you should take your friend to church a few more times and once your church friends get to know your friend more, things should go better. Talking to them about it will probably make everyone feel bad and make the situation even more awkward. Nobody did anything wrong, it was just one of those weird things that happens. I hope that you feel better and I wish you the best of luck!
So, i've been going through some crap. i'm a freshman, and at the beginning of the year i was in a show where i met a bunch of seniors and juniors and sophomores and other freshman and became friends with them. one of them i immediately had a crush on and his name was david, and he's a senior. he's had a girlfriend for almost a year now, but the girlfriend is a sophomore and she is SO oblivious to what is going on around her and she has no social life and she studies all the time, and she's not a very sexual person at all though her boyfriend is. so by the time the show ended, we were all really good friends. a few weeks later, i started another show with some of them, and david was in it and we grew to be even closer. we used to talk online every night about stuff. keep in mind, now, that he didnt get all that much from his girlfriend. after awhile, things began to get a little out of hand online-i told him that i do masturbate, and that's where it kind of took off. we started to like do it together online, and it wasnt all that bad, but it still was wrong. and we told each other everything and talked about sex all the time and fantasies we have and who we'd like to have sex with. he would compliment me all the time, and tell me i'm beautiful and that he would love to have sex with me someday, but he would never do anything right now because i'm so much younger than him (he's 18, i'm 14). so this went on 2-4 times a week, and it slowly got like more intense and we would say what we were doing as we did it and i dont know what made me do it because i know it was stupid and all but i had a huge crush on him and he made me feel so good about myself. and he used to kid around all the time about sending naked pictures. until one night when he actually did. they got more and more "risky" each picture he sent and by the last one was just like him naked and it was so fun but so wrong! and he asked me to do the same..so i said i would..but i was so afraid because im self conscious and naked pictures are just a bad idea in general. so the next night i did it and sent more teasingly pictures than completely naked ones, and he sent more, and the next night we did it together at the same time and did the whole cyber thing. he also sent a video and asked me to do the same the next night..i was so stressed out every day because i didnt want to take the pictures but at the same time i did and i loved his compliments and i wanted to please him and a video would be just awkward you know? but the night before we did he went to a party, got drunk, and kissed another girl and had to tell his girlfriend and it was this big to do so i told him we need to stop and we did. so then i was like alright we'll still be close and all will be well. yeaaaa right. he didnt talk to me that much at all and he told people he was sick of me and he totally ignored me for a week and during that week i figured out from talking to other people and through whats been going on that he was just using me and he never actually cared about me and was only nice to me and pretended to be my friend so id send the pictures and cyber with him at night. not only did he do this to me, he started to do this with another girl within the past week. and shes 14 too. it sucks and it hurts a lot and he IMed me this morning and said "you are really mad at me huh?" and i just let him have it and i felt so great but he was sweet and said he really does care and really is my friend and all and feels guilty and like..w'ere going to talk later tonight..and i still like him..and i dont know what i should do now! not be friends with him anymore? be aquaintances? be friends? let it all go? be mad or upset? i'm so confused. sorry this is so long, but any help/advice would be greatly appreciated!:)
I've been used in a way similar to this before. The guy was a year younger than me and we had been friends for a summer because we worked together. I had a huge crush on him, he was single, and we started flirting hardcore online all the time. I was so sure that we'd end up together. Two days after I got up the courage to come out and directly tell him that I liked him, he said this to me. "I'm really reluctant to tell you this, but I have a girlfriend :-/" He claims to have started dating her that day, but he's told me and so many other people so many lies I really doubt that that was the case. I felt extremely heartbroken and used, especially since I'd worked up all that courage to tell him how I felt about him. I was used and I blame it on the internet. People can be way too open with each other when they don't have to look the other person in the eyes. Instant messenger depersonalizes things way too much and things are said that would never be said in real life. Anyways, he wasn't serious about it and I was. He was just having fun and didn't care about how much it might hurt me. He knew I was being serious, but I did practically throw myself at him. He's a guy, he wasn't going to say no. I met his girlfriend after awhile. She was 4 years younger than me and she wasn't that pretty. My self-image dropped to about zero. I was sad for a long time and then I got mad. Very mad. I said some really hurtful things to him and about him to other people. After all that, I'm now good friends with him again and both of us have put everything behind us. We talk online sometimes and we hang out together with a group of people every once in awhile. It's not awkward anymore and I've gotten over him completely. My advice to you would be to not talk to him for awhile. Someone gave me that advice for my situation and it worked really well. Blocking him would probably be a good idea so that you aren't tempted. Three months would probably be a good amount of time. After that, reevaluate the situation. You'll have a much better idea of what kind of relationship you want to have with him. Being friends would be fine, but if that's not what you want, you can just remain acquantances. I don't think he's a pervert or anything, you are only 4 years apart. A lot of married couples have a 4 or more year age difference. So what if he's legally an adult? Just barely. Reporting him would be silly especially since you willingly shared things with him. He's not a bad person, just a jerk. We let those guys hurt us. Use this experience to your advantage. It'll be a lot harder for guys to hurt you in the future. I'm really sorry that this happened to you. I know that what you went through was worse than what I did, but I do feel your pain and know what you're going through to some extent. I hope that I didn't make you feel stupid or feel like it was your fault either. It definitely isn't and you aren't. It was totally all that guy. No matter what he says, he knew how you felt and he lied to you and used your naivety. That's an awful thing to do. I have a feeling that this happens to a lot of people, so you're not alone. It's so easy to get caught up in the moment, especially in the safety of being by yourself, at home, at your computer. That goes for BOTH of you. The possibility that he would have done that to you were it not for the internet is quite small. Now you're all the wiser and I hope that you feel better soon. I wish you strength in getting over this guy and moving on. Good luck!
So, I'm a boy, my friend is a girl..her boyfriend has recently gotten back and they are w/ eachother a lot. So they had sex a few times the first week, and it's been like 3 weeks now. They have sex at least once every day(i'm pretty sure) but if not, just about. Well i don't care, because her bf is my friend too..but what DOES actually piss me off is that we were watching a movie, and when her mom went to church, the very second she pulled out of the driveway, they ran to her room to have sex. leavin me there alone..i don't want to piss her off but i want her to know that it bugs me..how do i do it w/out hurting her?
Don't even talk to her about it. She doesn't deserve that after what she did. If it happens again follow them into her room and tell them that they are not going to do that while you are there. Say that it's completely rude and makes you feel extremely uncomfortable. They can find someone else to hang out with if that's what they want to do. If saying all that pisses them off well, they deserve it and you should stop hanging out with them unless it's in a public place. They're walking all over you and they know it. Don't let them do that to you. If you try to be nice and just talk about it, your point will not get across. You need to say "NO" and it needs to come across as a very strong "no".
Some civil talking is necessary too, though. Make sure you do this part in a nice, friend-like way. If you do anything, you need to talk to your friend about how much sex she is having. She is going to end up getting pregnant. There are so many risks to sex especially at a young age. Be the good friend you are and let her know that she's being pretty immature and irresponsible. Sex really can't be that great and after awhile it's going to lose some of its appeal. After that what's going to happen to her relationship? Relationships based on sex don't work out. She's setting herself up for a BIG fall.
Remember, too, that everything is up to you. You don't have to take my, or anybody else's advice. At the end of the day you're going to want to do, and should do, what you feel is right. Good luck!
I'm 16/f and I was talking to one of my guys friends today and about guys that like me but wouldn't date me. He said that I sometimes intimidate guys because I'm cocky and I make fun of people. I don't randomly make fun of people but just my friends like crack jokes about them and stuff. They do it right back to me and don't care so it isn't like mean or anything, just fun/funny. And yeah, I can be a little on the cocky side sometimes but most of it is just confidence; only like .000007% of me comes of as well...conceded.
So my question is guys, do girls like that intimidate you? Because personally, I think if you are intimidate by a girl like that then you're a pussy and I wouldn't want to date you anyways. Or is it just insecure high school boys?
You're not giving the right attitude for dating. I was much like you in high school. I didn't get a boyfriend until my first year in college. If a guy doesn't think that you like them then there is much less of a chance that they would ask you out. Forget about giving the right signals, you aren't giving any signals at all. That doesn't mean that something is wrong with you or that you're not dating material, it just means that you're not going to be attracting guys with the way you carry yourself. I don't think you should change. I didn't and I ended up just fine. I'm in a really great relationship that has gone very well for over a year. High school relationships aren't usually very good ones. You've been with the people for so many years and in just a few more you'll be separated. Very few people stay with their high school sweethearts. I'll bet it's not that the guys you talked to don't like your looks or personality, it's just that it's not the right time or place for a relationship to form. I'd say just keep on keepin on with the way you are and sooner or later you'll find a guy that really likes you and will be great for you and you for him. Don't date just to date. It's silly. Once you get into college or into the work force there will be tons of opportunities for you. I do have one tip though. You really have to let guys you like know that you like them. I made that mistake so many times. I acted the way I would act around anybody towards them. If they don't like me for who I really am what's the point in dating them? Why should I change, right? True, but wrong. Doing that makes guys that you like think that you don't like them so there is much less of a chance that they'll ask you out whether they like you or not. You don't have to change per se, you just have to let them know that you're interested in them in whatever way you feel most comfortable. I went the route of implications and it ended in a really terrible rejection, so try to be kind of obvious about it. If you're not obvious you're more likely to get used. I hope that some of what I said can help you and I wish you the best of luck. Don't worry, you will find someone! :)
Hey, I'm talking to my boyfriend online right now and he asked me if I have asked any one for advice on things in our relationship. I said yeah and i told him a couple of things that I have asked advice for. I asked him the same question and he said yes and that he did "10 minutes ago" about how to be closer. He told me he asked one of the girls I talk to the most thats on my basketball team. He said that he wants to keep it between him and her about what she said. I dont like it when people keep secrets from me, especially if its my own boyfriend/best friend. Has this ever happened to you? How have you handled it before?
Thanks!
I don't think it's that big of a deal. I mean, yes, it makes you feel kind of jealous and upset, but really, all he did was talk to someone about you. Someone that knows you well and would be able to help him out. I think the reason he doesn't want to tell you is because he doesn't want to make you feel bad about something you may have done that he asked her about. When someone asks for advice it means that something is wrong and they want to either fix it or cope with it in the best way. If it's something personal about you he's not going to want to tell you so that you get uspet over it and try to change yourself. He's protecting you more than anything. If it bothers you that he's talking to your friend, just recommend advicenators to him. It's less personal and there's a very small chance of him falling for one of the people on here if that is what you're worried about. Otherwise, try to trust him a little more. People on advicenators would be able to help him less than your friends would because they know you better. He's shown that he's not embarassed to say that he has asked for advice and that he wants your relationship to be the best it can be and last a long time. I've never had any problems with this kind of thing. I let my boyfriend do whatever he wants with very very few boundaries. I check up on him sometimes, but it's more to have a laugh over things that he's doing and an interest in what he's up to than a jealousy issue. I'm have a lot of trust in him and I'm not a jealous person at all. It's a lot better this way, where there's little jealousy. So, basically what I'm saying is, even though you may feel a little jealous, it's always better to try not to be and if you are don't let it show and it will go away soon enough and not become a problem. It's good that you and your boyfriend are so open with each other. I think that the biggest problem in relationships is the lack of communication. You two don't have a problem with that and I think that because of that you can and do have quite a good relationship. Try to be a little more understanding of what he does and good luck!
My friend told me that he fell in love with this girl that he has known for 8 years. He asked me to ask her out for him but she said no and i dont know how to tell him. Im 14/m by the way i really need your advice.
Of course she said no. If your friend doesn't have the guts to ask her himself she's not going to want to date him! In the future don't do that for anybody. It really screws everything up and makes it much harder on everyone. There are a few things you can do. Talk to the girl and tell her that you're sorry that you asked her out for your friend. Make it sound like it was your idea because he's been talking about you so much and telling you how much he likes her. Then talk to your friend and tell him that the girl wanted him to ask her out himself. You didn't do anything wrong, but yeah, don't do that again no matter how much your friend begs. Girls HATE it and it can mess up any possibilities of a relationship forming. I hope that everything gets straightened out and good luck!
I just the other day finally heard from a guy I'm friends with. He had moved several months ago for a job and I hadnt heard from him until yesterday. He sent me an email apologizing to me for taking so long to contact me; and said he had finally hooked up his internet.
He asked me if I could write him live on MSN messanger, and I got it all hooked up today. He wants to talk to me on Saturday before he goes back to work. I'm getting really excited, because I feel I am finally ready to tell him how I feel about him. I've been in love with him for the past 3 years. I think he has similar feelings for me. We are both shy and reserved. What can I say to him on MSN messanger that would give him the message of how I'm feeling without freaking him out?
Just give him hints to your feelings for now. If you rush into telling him everything you run the risk of scaring him away. What you should do is keep in close contact with him for a few weeks before directly saying that you like him. If you hint at it for awhile it will keep him interested in you and he will probably take your lead do some hinting of his own whether he realizes it or not. Progressively make your hints a little stronger and you'll have him wrapped around your finger. With all that hinting in the air a relationship is almost a sure thing. Good luck!
To give you a little background i am 19 he is 23, i am in macon,ga working at a hospital full-time and he works out of town. We broke up a little over a month ago and i dont know what to do anymore i am constantly thinking of him even at work. i have tried talking to him but he want talk to me. we were going out over two years and all of a sudden he ended it with no way i knew it was coming. he still has some of my things and i have some of his things and i have to meet him next week to get them but i dont know if i can handle seeing him. He said alot of mean stuff to mean over the last month i know what it was just to hurt me, i asked him why we broke up and what went on all he would say is that he wanted to be single for a while. does that mean he found someone new? i have always trusted him even working out of town. i had no reason not to. he would call me every night and we would talk hours on end becuase we missed each other. and this came so sudden. i am getting to that point were i dont sleep and when i do i crawl into bed at like 4:00 am and have to wake early so not much sleep and i barely eat maybe on emeal a day. i just dont know wha tto do anymore. help guys answer to to why he did this and why guys say mean stuff
He didn't necessarily find someone else. It's a possibility, but I don't think that's the case. Spontaneous break ups like that can happen because the person has committment problems. He probably got scared and didn't know what else to do. You're in a really awful situation because whether he means to or not he's being very selfish. He's not thinking about your feelings at all. When you see him there are two things that you should do. Tell him how it's really hard for someone you've been so close to you for so long to just disappear out of your life completely. It's like they died. You'd really really like it if he would talk to you every once in awhile and kind of ease out of it more. You'll give him his space and his time, but it's kind of unfair that he isn't giving you anything. You're the one feeling all the hurt and he is the one with the problem. Don't be mean about it, be honest. Another thing you should do is ask really politely and nicely if you can maybe keep something of his to comfort you since you're now apart and to help you remember all the good memories that your relationship brought. Doing these two things will either really upset him or make him think a little. If it upsets him, well, things can't get much worse. Hopefully it will make him realize that running away from his problems doesn't fix them and he's going to leave a trail behind him full of pain, regret, and unfinished business. Sure his problems won't affect him anymore, but they'll always be there and pretty soon it will be too late to straighten things up and he'll regret it for the rest of his life. He's fixing the problem in the short term, but making it worse for himself in the long run. Even if you two don't end up together in the end, relationships do need some closure and it's always good to end it mutually and on good terms. It's okay to cry when you see him and it may help you feel a little better just to see his face. Don't try to force yourself on him, that's the one thing you don't want to do. If you are honest and tell him what you think and feel it could really help. Consider sending him a really well thought out e-mail or letter if he just runs away again. Oh, and it's a great thing that you two are giving each others' stuff back. A lot of the time that doesn't happen and it's a shame. It also shows that you two are on pretty good terms. After a month or so of missing you he shoud come around and eventually he will talk to you again even if it's too late. I really hope that things work out for you and I wish you the very best of strength, patience, and luck.
I am so stressed out that i am having trouble sleeping and concentrating. Any advice on ways to releve stress?
Exercise helps a lot. When you exercise, things called endorphis are released in your body. Endorphis are natural stress releivers. I've always found exercise to be the best way to deal with stres in my life. Set time aside every day as "you" time. That will help you too. Do something that you like, watch some TV, write in a journal, read, cook, anything that will help you relax and take your mind off of whatever is stressing you out. Good luck! :)
i've started track, i'm going to start out throwning but i might go to running, i'm not sure yet. but the thing is practice is until 4. by the time i get home i no longer want to exercise.
how do i still find time && stay motivated to exercise after track practice??
any tips?
For now, I would say just be patient. In a few weeks you will be getting more than enough exercise during practice. You won't be able to do anything else, much less want to or need to. If after a few weeks, you still feel like you're not getting enough exercise, stay a half hour or so after practice is over. Just stay right at the track and don't go home. Think of it as just an extension of the practice. I ran track in high school and I've done that before. You can get a lot done in a half hour. I hope that I helped you and good luck!
just gonna come out wit the question i wanna kno. when using a tampon do you use the first whole or 2nd whole? sorry im a moron :-( but im going to FL and i dont wanna wear pads the whole time im 15 so yah know i think im old enough haha.
but please answer..
There will be instructions in the box, don't worry. This site should help you out a lot too. Good luck!
http://www.youngwomenshealth.org/tampon.html
are your wisdom teeth suposed to hurt when they come in? If they do does it eventually stop once they completely come in? See mine are coming in. i Have 2 already and the other two on my right side is just killing me. i see them coming through and there in the same spot as the other ones on the other side. but they just hurt. i dunno why. And to top it off im so affraid of the dentist i just dont tell anyone they hurt. I CANT go there. biggest fear of mine.
any ideas? 5's for good advice
You may not have to get them taken out. My guess is that you don't. However, it's very very important that you have someone look at them to make sure that there aren't any problems. I have to get a wisdom tooth taken out in May. If I don't get it removed, it can completely ruin the tooth next to it AND if the root gets a chance to grow in it will be touching a nerve. If I don't get it taken out within the year, I'll be in trouble because once it's touching that nerve it CAN'T get taken out or half of my face will be paralyzed. Wisdom teeth are not something you should ignore. Lots of people are afraid of the dentist, but don't let your fear keep you from doing what you really need to do. Get it checked out by your dentist. If your dentist refers you to an oral surgeon, don't let that scare you. The oral surgeon, like your dentist, is just going to look. There won't be any scraping or poking, maybe just an x-ray. Hopefully everything is good to go and you may even get some pain medication or something to help you out. What you are doing right now can be really dangerous and like others have said, you'll get knocked out and won't remember a thing even if you do have to have any of your wisdom teeth taken out. I hope that everything works out for you and good luck!
guys girls how can i tell when a girl is a virgin? its it true that when virgins have sex for the first time they bleed?
Unless you've seen her in the act, there's no way to ever know. A girl may or may not bleed the first time. She may even bleed the second and third times. You can't tell by the way she may walk, dress, act, what skills she has sexually...you can't even tell if you talk to her about it. She could be lying to you. Even if you two are close and keep no secrets from each other, she may feel too embarassed to fess up to having sex before or even too embarassed to admit that she hasn't. Hopefully she will tell you the truth. Good luck and if you are planning on having sex with her make sure that you use a condom and don't do it unless you are both ready for it emotionally and to face any consequences that may come from it. That said, good luck!
My bf is best friends with a guy that is just plain creepy. For one thing, he is 38 years old and still lives with his mother. He is also a pedophile, and only goes for very young girls. My bf has even told me that he's a pedophile, so I'm not making it up.
The thing that bothers me is that I've caught his friend staring at me inappropriatly at parties, and he's even winked at me. I had to give his friend a ride home once (because the loser doesnt have a car ) and he told me he liked me for a long time and told me to kiss him. I told him no, and after I dropped him off I told my bf what happened. My bf just laughed and didnt seem to take it seriously. I also heard a story that his friend used to stalk a waitress.
I really don't understand why my bf is still friends with this creep. Sometimes I feel that he'd rather be friends with him than me.
Should I give my bf an ultimateum and say it's either his creepy friend or me? Or would that be too controlling?
No, no, no don't do that. He can be friends with who he wants. However, (yes there's always a however) he needs to stick up for you. You feel uncomfortable, unsafe, and completely weirded out by this guy and your boyfriend has done nothing about it but laugh! It's not the friend that's the problem, it's your boyfriend for not doing anything about it. You can make an ultimatum that he has to tell his friend to stop or you'll break up with him. That would be very appropriate. After he tells his friend to leave you alone, if the friend keeps being inappropriate to you, then it's a problem with the friend. You have a few options if this happens, one of them does include making your boyfriend decide between you two, but since it then isn't really his fault that's kind of harsh. Once things have transpired, it should be easier to see the options available to you. For now, just make your boyfriend tell him to leave you alone. That is important. This friend of his sounds kind of dangerous! I hope that everything turns out well and good luck!
ok well i have like soo many pimples and i have cream but does toothpaste really help them go away? please ii need help. this guy said he likes but i have too many pimples&ihate them too so please help. ill rate high.
Wow that guy is a JERK. Don't you dare date him!
That taken care of, I think that you should see a dermatologist. A dermatologist is a doctor specializing in skin and will be able to give you a perscription acne medication that will be right for your specific condition. My aunt made me go to one once and I am so happy that she did! I only had a mild case of acne and thought it was silly, but I ended up getting a cream that was perfect for me. Do it for yourself though, not for that guy. He doesn't deserve your time. Good luck!
ok ... well i got my period in 6th grade. im now in 8th grade and i don't use tampons. is this bad? should i start using them? how do i start? i'm kind of scared to .. i tried once but chickened out. all of my friends that have their period, even those who just got it, say they use tampons. with the summer coming up &all .. should i start? thanks
I think you should try them. You may end up liking them better. If not you just go back to the pads. There's nothing wrong with them. It's all up to your personal preference. More people than you would think don't wear tampons. Personally, I find them uncomfortable both physically and mentally. I'm glad that I tried them though, and they do come in useful during those times when your family or friends decide to go to a waterpark when you're on your period. Talk about bad timing. Anyways, good luck!
I'm a junior in high school, and to tell you the truth, I want to get through college as quickly and easily as possible, mainly because 1 I have a job and 2 I want to really start my life. In order to do this, what kind of classes should I take? What kind of college should I go to? Any other tips?
*I am not made of money so don't recommend top universities or anything please
I think what you're looking for is a community college. Community colleges usually have the lowest tuition. Go to the two year community college that's closest to where you live as a liberal arts major. If it's possible for you to commute, you will save a lot on college living expenses and it will be easier for you to have a part time job. Lastly, talk to your guidance counselor about this. You'll get a lot of help from there. Your guidance counselor will know you a little more personally than us and will have a much better idea of exactly where you should go to college and what for. It's such a great thing that you have made the decision to attend college. It makes a world of difference. I wish you the best of luck in everything.
I don't attract guys at all. It's been said that I'm a lesbian (which I'm not), and I have an extremely brutal (but with purpose...I don't just say "Fuck the world" for no reason and think it's funny) sense of humor and wear all black. Are these turn-offs? But I'm a nice person. Though I can be a little morbid, I'm generally pretty friendly, I consider others' feelings, and I try to make friends, but nobody at my school wants to be around me. It's inevitable someone will say "Marian, I REALLY wanna sit next to Joe Shmoe. Can you move over?" at least twice a day. I just hate that. Whenever we have to choose partners/teams in gym, I'm always the last person. I feel so lonely, I cry sometimes in the locker room when nobody is around. There's only 1 friend of mine that's a guy who actually appreciates me for who I am, and I now have such a huge crush on him. I don't want to sound conceited at all, but I think I'm a nice-looking person, so that eliminates the idea that guys might not like me because of my looks. Does anyone understand? How can I make more friends? Even though he doesn't like me back in the same way, should I tell this boy I like him, and if so, how?
I've had some of these problems before. People think I'm angry and they always seem to get an impression from me that I don't intend to give. My own cousin, whom I'm very close to, used to joke with my uncle about how they believed that I was a lesbian. The problem was that I was terrified to let other people know the true me. To make that sound a little less cliche, I tend to keep my emotions to myself. You're not sending the wrong, or mixed signals to guys, you're not sending ANY signals! If you think a guy is just going to just walk up to you, call you hot, say he likes you, and ask you out, you've got another thing coming. That's not how the world works and it's a hard lesson to learn, trust me. What you need to do is start sending out signals. The thing is, a few guys probably want to do what I just described, but a guy isn't going to ask you out if he doesn't have any clue that you like him. Try to think of yourself in a guy's position. It's kinda scary! Start sending OBVIOUS signals. Don't throw yourself at a guy, leave a little to the imagination, but give yourself a little nudge and then give a little more and a little more until you come out and tell him that you like him. I know that this probably isn't "you", but that's how it's done. I really regret not pursuing some of my crushes in high school. If you like the guy do what's necessary to get him or you'll regret it too. Step outside of your shell. This guy that you're talking about for instance, yes definitely let him know how you feel. It will be a really great start for you. Even if he rejects your advances, it's a step forward for you that should soon lead you to a relationship, if not with him, with someone else. I'm not telling you to turn into a flirt, a slut, or desperate loser. Just try to express yourself a little more. I have a feeling that things with your friend may turn out better than you think. Good luck!
ok.. so my boyfriend looks at porn. ive never had a problem with porn with any other guy ive been with, but lately its been getting to me. I just cant bare the thought of my boyfriend fantasizing about other women. even worse; their bodies are perfect && mine are far from it and i just dont want him comparing me to them. So my question is:
-Is it ok for me to feel this way?
-Is looking at porn considered cheating to some people?
-Should i say something to my boyfriend
-If so what?
(hes very stubborn)
I am going to be realistic. Sure, there are guys out there that don't look at porn. The ones that do, however, aren't going to stop. The fact that he's not keeping it secret from you is a good sign. He's being open with you. A lot of guys that you could have dated instead, would have said they would stop to make you happy and then just keep looking in secret. THEN, maybe, you could consider it cheating. It's okay to feel the way you do, it's very okay, but if you want things to work with this guy you're going to have to either ignore it, try to understand it, or just deal with it. He's going to feel like you're trying to control him and that you don't trust him or his feelings for you. If you can't bear the thought of him fantasizing about other women you are going to have jealously and relationship problems your entire life. Think about that statement a little. Doesn't it seem kind of silly? Sure you don't look at naked pictures of guys, but you can't say that you've never, ever, while with him, looked at another guy and thought to yourself, hey he's kinda hot and smiled to yourself. It's not very different than what he's doing. You can't stop him from looking. Once your relationship progresses he will become more "exclusive". Be patient. It's his choice what he wants to do and if it causes that many problems for you, the only thing you can do is break it off with him and try to find a guy that isn't into porn. Guys tend to be more visual with sex and girls tend to be more emotional. Porn is a sexual outlet for people when they can't have the real thing. Would you rather he looked at porn or cheated for real? He has no emotional attachement with these girls whatsoever and hasn't done anything with them. It's not cheating in the slightest. It's quite the opposite. He'd much rather be with you than his porn no matter what the girls look like because for one, he'll be able to experience senses other than sight, such as touch and smell, and he has an emotional connection with you. That makes it better. My advice to you is to talk to him about it with the intent of understanding, not trying to get him to stop. I think that if you can understand it, you will be able to live with it, like lots of people do including myself. Porn doesn't mean the same thing to him that it does to you. A good relationship involves constructive communication and compromise. Ask him for his opinions and don't let your own opinions get in the way from understanding his. Even if you don't agree with him, you can still understand him and have a great relationship. I hope that I helped you and good luck.
This might be a completely moronic question but are there any kind of air conditioners that you don't have to mount in your window?
My apartment doesn't have central air and I'd like an air conditioner when it gets warm this summer. But my windows are a weird sort of shape and the whole apartment is oddly shaped so air doesn't circulate nicely. So yes, anyone know of any air conditioner that doesn't need to be mounted in a window?
Definitely! I've seen them in WalMart, but I'm not sure if they are only available there seasonally. Just go somewhere in your area where air conditioners would be sold and I'm sure they'll be able to show you one or at least a catalog. They tend to stand tall and thin, meant for the floor or a tabletop. Good luck in finding them!