I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
Visitors: 64980
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I like this guy, and we get along great, but me and his best friend just do not get along! I want to eventually date him, but i'm afraid that his friends may influence him otherwise... what should I do? (link)
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I still think you should try to go out with this guy you like. Generally people can be strongly influenced by their best friend but in my opinion there should be a certain point where that should stop. If he likes you and wants to date you then he shouldn't let the opinion of any friend make him think otherwise. If he is that easily influenced, you may be better off without him.
However,why do you and his best friend not get along? Perhaps if you know why this is or can work out why it is then you can try to resolve the issue. I know that isn't always possible but if you really like this boy then it's probably worth a try. See if you can find some common ground and stick to it.
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My dad is really abusive...towards me and my mom. Especially my mom. He calls her degrading names and he used to abuse her..alot. Even while she was pregnant with me and my brother and my sister. To this day, I am almost 17 and he still verbally abuses and me also. My mom has considered divorce, but we have no money, no where to go. Today something horrible happenned and he was calling my mom ALOT of horrible words that I can't even say on here. I am afraid that when he comes home from work tomorrow that he will yell at her again..Also, I am afraid that when my siblings and I go to school, he will beat her. Please give advice. (link)
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Having never been in this situation, my advice may not be too sound but the best thing I can think right now is that you talk to your Mum and you GET OUT as soon as you can. Froget that you don't have money right now. After all, think which is worse. Having little money and spending some time in a refuge until you can rent somewhere but being away from it all, or suffering continued abuse with the risk of it getting worse?
In most cases, people insist that you stand up to bullies. Not this time. When it comes to situations like this, the best thing you can do is to get away from it once and for all. I don't know which country you are in but if you are here in the UK, you can call the police anonymously and he can be arrested for domestic violence. If you are in the US, I would have hoped that the same rules apply.
The bottom line is that you, your Mum and your siblings really need to work together to get out of this awful situation. You need to work out a time to leave and somewhere to go. Perhaps you have family you can stay with? But wherever you go, it will be worth it to be out of there and you will finally get the chance to be a proper family. You will need to encourage your Mum because she may be too scared to leave. Get her while your Dad is out and tell her the detrimental effect seeing her abused and being abused is having on you all and that you all need to get away from your Dad.
I really hope that helps and I wish you the very best of luck. If you ever need to talk, please send me a message.
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I have liked this kid for 6 years and just now he called my brother (hes his best friend) and he told him he got a girlfriend and I feel really empty and hollow inside what should i do??? (link)
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Oh poor you!! Unfortunately, in these sorts of situations, there's only one thing you can do. Get yourself a few pints of your favourite, fattiest ice cream and whatever other tasty treats you might normally deny yourself and have a day where you slob out in your room doing nothing but watching weepy films and stuffing your face. Don't even get out of your pj's. Make it two days if you like but no more than that. This time is for crying, screaming, whatever the mood leads you to do.
Afterwards, have a nice hot bath or shower, do a full pampering and go out with a big smile on your face. You may not feel like it yet but people LOVE people who smile a lot. So grin like a loon and set your mind on meeting new people and having fun. Don't decide to forget about him. You should never forget people in your life as they always teach us something.
If all else fails, remember that you have long lives ahead of you and he probably won't be with this girl forever. If he does break up with her at some point, leave it a few weeks and take it as your cue to do something about it, before its too late.
Good luck
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So there's this guy that I'm best friends with. And we've been friends since 4th grade, so we know each other really well. Well, I like him. A lot. I really want to go out with him. Last night at the school dance we slow danced together and now everyone thinks we're going out. And I could tell he enjoyed dancing with me. I mean I would just ask him out but there's more. Two of my other friends like him. One likes him a lot and I'm afarid to tell her I like him (even though she was one of the people that got us to dance). The other one only likes him a little and knows I like him, and, frankly, doesn't care (as in she wouldn't be mad if we went out). But I still don't want anyone to be mad at me. What do I do? Thanks. (link)
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No guy is worth risking a friendship over. The only exception to that rule being in the case of True Love.
However, bearing in mind that you risk losing a good friend over this, my advice would be to talk to her about it. Let her know that you enjoyed the slow dance with him and that you really like him. Say you wanted to talk to her about this first because you were thinking of asking him out but didn't want to risk hurting her because you know she also really likes him.
After this, it's unfortunately a case of waiting and seeing what she says. If she says yes then it's all good and you can go ahead and ask him out (but be tactful. If he says yes and you do go out, try not to talk about it all too much to your friend) but if she says no, I'm afraid you're going to have to try to move on. Hard to do, I know but unless you want to risk your friendship, it's not worth it!
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There's this guy in my class that one of my friends thought I would make a cute couple with, and some of my friends think he likes me. They're always bringing him up and stuff, and they always ask if I like him, but I won't tell them I do because they would torture me even more about it. Not that it really matters because 2 of my friends are already convinced I like him (which I do) but also I like this guy from camp who lives 45 minutes away who I haven't seen or talked to since summer, and he told me he liked me and I told him that I liked him on the last day of camp, so I feel bad liking someone else. Me and the guy in my class talk alot even though we aren't exactly friends, and sometimes I see him looking at me (which for all I know could just be a coincidence) but my friends swear that he likes me. I'm not sure what to do...
Any help would be appreciated, and I'm sorry if this was long/confusing
btw, I'm 14/f (link)
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Well first of all, you shouldn't feel too bad about liking another guy after the one from camp. People change their minds about who they like ALL the time and if you haven't seen him or talked to him since Summer, you can't be expected to hang around and wait for him forever without knowing if anything is even going to happen.
You need to make up your minf what you want to do about this guy. Do you want to ask him out? Personally, my recommendation would be that you at least try asking him out. From experience, it's the better thing to do or you will find yourself, years from now, wondering what might have been. Even if he says no, at least you will know and won't have to wonder "What if?"
Also, I would suggest you ask him yourself. Although it's riskier to your pride in case he says no, most guys have a greater respect for girls who make the first move themselves rather than doing the whole "My friend really likes you, will you go out with her?" scenario.
So take a deep breath, catch him in a good mood (preferably when he's away from his boymates - he has his 'manly image' to worry about)and tell him you like him and were wondering if he wanted to do something sometime. See what he says and take it from there. If he says no, you have to cut your losses and move on. I'm not going to tell you there are plenty more fish in the sea, but there will be other guys out there for you and they WILL say yes, even if he doesn't.
Good luck!
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ok....alot of my friends are like pissin me off...i got one of my best friends a boyfriend...and like..... i am best friends with that guy... and i am also best friends with her.... ok..... so... there parents don't know about them...going out.... so they are like okay...carissa we need somehow to plan a way to secretly meet.. im like okay go to the mall.. there like how? im like ok..... i can drive angela there..my friend.... and kenny can be dropped off by one of his friends... we can supposedly misteriously meet... there like thats a great i dea.. i wil lcall you wen.. so then my friend was over last nite.. and angela called her... and she is like.. ok.. carissa..(me) thought of this great idea how we can meet.... so i need a ride... can you take me? im like wat the ****? she agreed that i would take them... so there like pissin me off... and then like everytime i go near kenny (her bf) she punches me or hurts me reallly bad.. and im like HE IS MY BEST FRIEND (one of them atleast) i wanna go by him,... to talk or sumtin cause were friends... and she beats me uyp... and she is just really pissin me off....... wat should i do?? im so confused (link)
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Your friend sounds like she's very insecure over this guy and I guess I can understand why she is this way with you. That's not to say I condone it because with everything you have been trying to do for them, she shouldn't be treating you like this. However, if he's your best friend, it sounds like she may be feeling a little jealous and insecure about the situation, in which case you need to sit her down and ask her why she's doing this to you after everything you've done for them.
Failing that, I'm afraid you're going to have to stay out of the way for a while. I know that sounds like a very unfair suggestion because he's your best friend but soon enough, when he realises how much he's missing his friend, he'll come to you and you can explain to him EXACTLY why you stayed away. That it's unfair to you that you've been helping them sneak around, only for her to treat you so badly if you try to continue your friendship with him. Then you tell him you didn't want to tell him before because you just didn't want to put him in the middle of a potentially awkward situation.
If he's a true friend, he'll have a word with his girlfriend and sort the situation out. It will probably come down to a simple "You HAVE to get on with each other and you have to at least try to be civil."
If this doesn't work then perhaps he's not such a good friend to you as you thought. If he is, he'll really come around after a short time of not speaking to you.
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I have been taking guitar lessons from an older married man. Sometimes he says things to me like "look at me when you're playing", but says it in a turned on way. I've also caught him staring inappropriatley at my chest. I got really embarrassed at the last lesson because for no reason at all, while I had two of my fingers on the D chord, he put his hand on top of my hand; wouldnt let go, and slid our hands down the entire guitar all the way from the top to bottom, and very slowly. Now I'm not an idiot, and know this wasnt part of the lesson. I know my face was all red and when I looked up at him, he looked guilty.
Now I don't know what to do, because he had been offering the lessons for free. He's also my friends boss, and I don't want to say anything. What should I do? (link)
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First of all you need to tell your parents and stop taking lessons from him. Men like him are the reason things like the Sex Offenders Register are out there and you do not want to be one of his victims. The other thing you need to remember is that you are probably not the first girl he has done this to. If he was this comfortable to perv over you, he's probably done it time and time before.
Stop going to the lessons and find yourself a new tutor who DOESN'T try to take payment in perverted ways from his students. After all, you don't know how far he may try to go..
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I just want some opinions on this:
Do you think it's wrong to let your boyfriend go to a strip club?
I personally think it is wrong, but then I see some girlfriends even go with their boyfriends to stripclubs!! I just don't get it. How could you let your boyfriend get turned on by another woman? ..or let alone get a sexy lap dance by another woman? I personally think that can even lead to the thought of cheating.
What do you guys think? I am 18 and my boyfriend is 17 and he will be 18 next month. I don't know whether to never let him go to a strip club(since that is a common thing for men to try out at least once in their lives) or to let him try it out. I am really uncomfortable with that idea. (link)
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Good question.
I suppose essentially, I disapprove of the whole idea of strip clubs. Women parade themselves like half dressed pieces of meat for a bunch of hungry wolves. I certainly wouldn't approve if my boyfriend wanted to go to one.
However, that being said, I would still like to go to see the Chippendales and how could I truly object to him going to a strip club when I would be prepared to do virtually the same thing?
I suppose the difference is that Chippendales are strictly look but don't touch and they have their status as performers, whereas strippers are stereotypically 'loose women' and not exactly untouchable.
Based on that, I suppose if it was a look only and don't touch scenario, I couldn't really say no to him but I would insist that he let me go and see the Chippendales to compensate!
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i used to have a lot of friends and allt he guys liked me. but this year we went to the new school and everyone hates me and talks about me and i pretty much have no freinds and i didnt even do anything, i even lost my best freind and people only talk to me when certian people are around. It sucks so much what should i do. (link)
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Oh God, I feel so bad for you.
Believe me, I went through EXACTLY the same thing. Two years in a 36 strong class and not one person talked to me in all that time.
I wish that I could offer you some true words of advice and tell you how to make them your friends...but I can't. What you need to realise right now is that these are not the sort of people you really want as your friends because it's really low to treat people that way.
You can try talking to a teacher and seeing if there is anything they can do; maybe switch you to another class? But I must admit that when I did this, it temporarily made the whole situation 10 times worse and I ended up locked in the loos crying for half an hour before a sixth former dragged me out.
It seems so awful now but the absoloute best thing you can do is to keep your head down, try to focus on studying and getting through it. Eventually, they will grow up and they'll probably never even remember having being so dreadful to you. But one day, you will be able to look back on the whole experience and see how much stronger it made you and how much of a better person you are than them because while they knocked you down and made you feel so miserable for so long, at least you didn't resort to bullying people to make yourself feel better.That's probably very little comfort to you right now....but if I could have my time again and had to go through being bullied like I was again, knowing how much stronger I would feel afterwards might have helped me get through it.
I'm sorry I couldn't be more help but please, if you want to seek help, it IS out there and if you think it will help, please, please don't suffer in silence. Speak to a teacher, a parent, anyone who you can tell how miserable you are. I really hope everything works out okay.
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alright heres the deal.. i like my best friend.. and he still likes me even though he has a girlfriend.. he cheated on her 3 time and he always says "i love you and if we were going out i woudln't cheat on you" and stuff and i don't know if i shoudl still like him or if i shoudl move on.. he's also always rubbing it in that he's going out with this chick to make me jealous.. and i don't get jealous..
additionally, when i like someone other than him.. he gets completly jealous and starts flipping on me and telling me that i'm an idiot because the guy is gay.. when first off he doesn't even know him.. i told him plently of times that if he woudln't be with his girlfriend i woudl be with him.. but he continues to go out with her.. and i feel really bad
should i get over him or whatnot? i will rate a 5 for any thought (link)
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Honestly? He doesn't seem like a great guy and I really think you need to try to work out why you like him in the first place. He clearly has very little respect for his girlfriend and, by the sounds of it, women in general.
The fact that he gets jealous when you take an interest in someone other than him suggests quite strongly a possessive and egomaniacal nature. It sounds as though he loves the attention he gets from women and that once they take an interest, they are 'his property', which explains why he gets so jealous when you stray in another direction.
Unfortunately, while I have no doubt at all that you are a wonderful person, men like this will say anything a woman wants to hear if they think it will increase their chances with them and this is more than likely the source of the confessions of love. I don't want to make this sound like I'm putting you down. However, I can honestly say from first experience that men like this will take all they can get and care nothing of the line of broken hearts left behind them.
Obviously, what you choose to do is entirely up to you. If you really like him then by all means see if you can go for it at some point but I beg you to please not expect anything short of the treatment his current girlfriend is receiving.
My feeling is that you would be a lot happier with a guy who will respect you, care for you and look out for you when needed. Most of all, you need a guy you can trust and I have to admit, I am a firm believer in the phrase "Once a cheater, always a cheater," and you'll be better off if you get out while the going is good and find a man who deserves you and can appreciate the great person you are, without treating you like dirt.
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me and my best friend arent talking and recently ive been getting im's and texts saying how my lifes soon gonna be a living hell and im gonna have no friends and that thres gonna be nasty rumors .. should i tell someone like a teacher that i trust? or should i try to work it out myself?please help! (link)
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If you think that someone is really going to follow through on these threats then you need to talk to someone. Not necessarily because you need protecting but more because they need to be aware of the situation in case anything were to happen.
I really think you should bring it up with your parents, as well as a teacher you trust. You don't know for sure it was your best friend so don't mention her if you can help it....but say that you haven't been getting on very well with a friend lately and you don't know for sure but they could be involved.
In the meantime, the only thing you can do is to keep your head down and act like it's all washing over you. The more you look like you're checking over your shoulder, so to speak, the more of a kick they'll get out of it.
On a side note, if this does have anything to do with your best friend, you may wish to reconsider that friendship. After all, I don't really believe that a true friend could turn around and treat someone like that.
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hey well i was wondering what all u alls views were on teens (well 14 yr olds) making out? is it to young, or not? and what about not going all the way like sex but..just a little ways? i just need to know what other peoples views are on this! please please please i'll rate high!! xo thanks (link)
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My honest opinion??
Well, I would say that really anything over 11 is okay for kissing, depending on how serious the kiss is because 11 years old doing tonsil tennis is always a little shocking to me.
As for anything sexual, I am - I'm sad to say - a member of the 'only 16's and over' club. I had my first kiss when I was 17 and first had sex when I was 18 and am pleased with this, as I had waited until it was with someone I truly love (and am still with him now).
Obviously, it all comes down to your own personal choosing but my belief is that you should only kiss someone when you really like them, that you should only have sex (or indulge in any other sexual activity) when you are 16 or over and that it should ALWAYS be when you're in a stable relationship. There's a lot of risk and responsibility where sex is involved and you need to know that you're sharing your body with someone who will appreciate it and not take it for granted, as well as needing to know he will be there for you if anything should go wrong.
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ok there used to be this movie on disney channel, i think it was wish upon a star or something ? idk, but anyway,it was about 2 sisters who wished they switched places and they did, etc.
well could someone tell me the name of it, and since its NEVER on tv anymore, can you rent it ?
thanks (link)
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Wish Upon A Star was the title and it was a great film. Unfortunately though, I don't know whether your UK or America so wouldn't really be able to tell you where you get it. However, you could try a search on the internet. Perhaps somewhere like Amazon might have it for cheap.
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Hi! well oookay..i have a problem. I have alot of friends in school..mostly "girl friends" lol and tonight me and my mom and dad had a talk and they are like dont you have a boyfriend or any "boy friends" and i was like umm..and they are like why dont you hang out with any of them? and i was like because you wouldnt let me and they are like have you ever asked and i said no because i was afraid and my dad was like i would let you go out with a boy out to dinner or something. and my mom goes what happened to you? you use to have a lot of friends and hangout with a lot of people and this year you are like a nerd. just to let you know im a sophomore and im 15 turning 16! but this made me really..kinda depressed. i would LOVE to hangout with guys..but the thing is im soo shy and not outgoing at all. and either are the people i hangout with. just to tell you..im the most outgoing out of all of us and im SO SHY around boys..well some of them. i just really want more guy friends..its hard for me tho.. =[ my parents really like caught me off guard with this. and they are always talking about me "having no friends" i mean one of my best friends is my cousin and then i have another best friend and the one other friend i sometimes hangout with. thats it..i mean like i said i talk to alot of girls in school..we just never hangout..we say we should but it never happens..and the boy thing is also bothering me. what can i do? ive tried so many times to boost up my confidence and be more outgoing..its just not me i guess..
i will rate high for anyone who answers!
thanks. (link)
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You shouldn't let your parents make you feel bad over this. Were you happy with your situation before? If so then you shouldn't let it affect you. I expect that they are only looking out for you and are just concerned because a lot of teenagers tend to separate themselves from people when something is wrong.
But what do YOU want? If you want to hang out with guys then perhaps you could see if you could just strike up a conversation with a guy you know. Just a casual thing really. Ask him about a common interest. If you're really not at all comfortable with this, however, then there is NOTHING wrong with sticking to hanging out with your girl friends. If you're concerned that you always say you will get together but you don't, why don't you try arranging something? You haven't said how old you are but perhaps you could arrange a sleepover (I think in America you call them slumber parties??), or you could arrange to go to your local mall or bowling or something else.
After all, if nobody else has arranged to do anything yet, you can be the one who gets it started! Not only will you have plenty of friends to hang out with outside of school, it will be a great confidence booster.
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I've been known lose my temper easily, usually with me ending up slapping someone in the face. Usually it only happens once a week where I'll just get really angry over something stupid that wouldn’t have mattered the day before. I take my anger out on guys usually (I'm a girl) I'm wondering if I have bi polar (sp?) since I can be totally fine one second and out of control the nest. My mom thinks I need a consular since she thinks I'm "Angry all the time" and "Depressed" but I’m not sure what to think. Any ideas? Btw, I’m 14 (link)
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I wouldn't have thought you were bi-polar, as the symptoms differ from those described by you. People suffering from the condition tend to become almost hysterically happy one minute and suicidal the next.
However, at 14 years old, you're going to be having a lot of hormones rushing around your system, edging you to grow up and unfortunately, these hormonal changes may be what is causing your bad temper. It is very common but you need to find better ways to take out your frustration than on other people's faces!
It might be a good idea to see a counsellor, to see if they can suggest alternative means of dealing with your emotions. They also might help you get to the root of why you're feeling like this.
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Okay so I'm trying out for a singing group at our school called "Chamber Singers" If you dont know what that is its like a choir...but tryouts are next friday and i have no idea what song to sing...i want to do one that really showcases my voice...but i dont know the best way to go about figuring out which one does...Like I thought about recording on a karaoke machine but you know how bad the quality of that is...and then i figured i could ask my parents but i'm not sure they'll be completely honest...what do yall think? I really DONT want to make a fool of myself....singing is a HUGE dream of mine and I take it extremely seriously! Thanks so much in advance for anyone who helps...
and please dont mention that i could sing for you because
A) I dont have a mic
and
B) You still sound back singing on a mic hooked up to the computer..so please dont mention that option...thanks! (link)
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Personally, I would recommend Over The Rainbow, by Eva Cassidy. It's a beautiful song if you have the voice for it and it does show off your vocals, as well as setting you apart from the people who go along trying to sound like Beyonce!
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so i've been dating this guy and he really likes me. he talks about wanting a really serious relationship as in wanting it to result in something for the future. hes 18 so i can understand why but the problem is im 16. i was in a year relationship all of my freshmen year and i enjoyed this year by being single. i really like single as a matter of fact i prefer being single but i really like this guy. he really likes me too and i dont want to break his heart and i dont want to lose him. but i feel like im not as happy as i used to be cause i cant party as much as i used to i cant talk to all the guys i used to hang out with all the girls i used to or anything like that. i really dont want to waste two more high school years by being in a relationhip when i should be having fun. what do i do? should i break it off or give it time to see how things go? what would you do? (link)
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Relationships are supposed to be fun and when you're with the right guy, at the right time, they are. But judging from what you're saying, this clearly isn't the case. Ignoring what he might feel about all this for a moment, it boils down to two options.
1)Dump him and be single again
2)Stay with him but continue to wonder what you're missing.
By everything you have said so far, if I were you, I would probably choose the second option. If you're feeling unhappy, the relationship clearly isn't working for you. You're still young and while I understand this guy has feelings for you, if you're not ready for that commitment yet, there's no point wasting his or your time, acting like there is a future for you both.
Your best bet is to break it off now - gently - by explaining to him that he's a really great guy and in a few years perhaps it would have been perfect but you're just not ready to commit to anyone right now. I know you're concerned that you will hurt his feelings but it's the kindest thing to both of you.
Just make sure that when you're living it up at the parties for the following few weeks, you remember to keep a sensitive eye out for him, so it doesn't look like you're too happy or any chances of reviving a friendship will be gone for good!
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I'm miserable with my boyfriend. I didn't really get to know him too well before I started going out with him, so now I have really found out what he is like. He is weird and obsessive over me, and he never leaves me alone. He always wants to kiss or make out and I really just want to be single again. :(
He is actually an okay person, but not to date, and I think by dating him, I've started to change him. He's stopped smoking and he does less drugs. He has a bad life and he said he would kill himself if he ever lost me. Now, I hate to be so pathetic and ask you guys this, but I really need help.
How can I tell him that I want out? Or that I just don't feel I'm ready for this relationship? I don't want to hurt his feelings, or for him to hate me, or worse of all, for him to commit suicide or go back to drugs. Please help!! (link)
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This guy has problems. BIG problems. But you shouldn't have to be shouldering this burden. At the end of the day, you're just 13 years old and you don't want to have to look back in years to come and feel you wasted them looking after an irresponsible boyfriend who treats you badly. More to the point, you shouldn't have to.
Generally, people who threaten to commit suicide very rarely do it and if they do, it's normally a loosley put together plan to seek attention, rather than to die. However, being told he would do this if he lost you is selfish and emotional blackmail. It is very likely that he has become so infatuated with you because he see's something in you that he lacks himself. Perhaps self confidence. You also boost his feelings of self worth. But he can't expect to have a relationship that is so co-dependent.
Put quite simply, you need to get out now. You need to be responsible for YOU. So try breaking it to him gently (given his weird and obsessive nature, I would do this where other people are going to be present). Tell him that it just isn't working out for you and you think you'd be better off apart. If he gets upset or really wants to know why, by all means gently explain to him that he's suffocating you and that you just can't stand by while he does drugs and goodness knows what else because you don't want to be dragged down. Explain you're only 13 and are too young to be having to deal with such things.
What he does after this point is his own doing and you need to reassure yourself of that. Yes, you will be breaking up with him and he will be upset about it but you cannot be responsible for what he does to himself.
Good luck.
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i am a 17 year old male haveing problems with my x-girl frien she was really controlling like on new years i wanted to go to a party on new years and she did not want me to go { i think that she did not trust me } and we broke up well i am talking to her again and i do not know if i should go back out with her or not so can u help me plz (link)
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Well, it really depends on what you want.
If you think back to all the time you spent with her, do you think that it was great and you would do it again or do you think it was nice but tainted by her jealousy and possessivenes?
My general rule of thumb where people like this is concerned, is to stay away, as possessive behaviour can get worse and turn into something far more unpleasent. However, if this was not something she made a habit of then perhaps she deserves another chance. Perhaps there was another reason she didn't want you to go to the party? If it was a lack of trust then it may not be worth starting the relationship back up, as a relationship without trust isn't worth having and will always end in tears.
So have a good think about her and decide how you feel. Unfortunately, I can't give you a direct answer but it may be a good idea to start with a friendship and see if you wish to get the relationship re-started when you really know what it is you want.
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Ok i'm about to go crazy! I've been very frustraited lately. Well it all started out because I liked this one guy and he liked me then he went out with someone else. And it's a whole big dramatic story which I wont type. Anyways, well i've been telling people i'm over it but really i'm not. It hurt like really bad, we were getting really close. Anyways, i havn't told anyone how i'm feeling so i'm about to explode! But, don't tell me to tell anyone because I won't. I have no one to tell. The only people I can tell know him too and would tell him and I don't want that. I've also already told him how I feel. But, that didn't matter. Anyways, I was wondering if there's anything I can do to make me like stop, "hurting" I guess you could call it. Is there anything I can do to like, not go crazy in the next week because of not telling anyone how i'm feeling? I just need help. I'll rate 5's to anyone who answers! Thanks SOOOO Much! (link)
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I believe that before we can meet the person we are truly 'meant' to be with, we all have to have our hearts badly broken at least once. It may not really seem so great at the moment but you need to have your heart broken once so you really appreciate love when it comes round.
But getting over your first love is a very tough thing to do.
The problem at the moment is that because you're trying so hard to put on a brave face and not let anyone see how you really feel, you're not getting a real chance to grieve, so to speak. You need to have a good couple of days - perhaps this weekend - where you sit indoors, in your rotten old tatty pyjamas, eat your weight in ice cream, crisps and any other rotten junk food you love and normally try to avoid. Get an entire BOX of Kleenex Balsam, shut yourself away in your room and sob your heart out. Cry and cry and scream (into a pillow or the neighbours might take issue with it!) and watch the soppiest, most sad movies you can find (I always felt that Pay It Forward was the best to cry to. That, or Forrest Gump).
One thing I like to recommend is that you write a letter to him. Write down everything you'd like to say. Be it good or bad, jot it all down. You can say whatever you like. What you think and what you feel because you're not going to send it. When you're done, either burn it (if you can get away with it) or rip it to shreds and throw it away. It sounds crazy but it's very therapeutic.
After the two days are up, however, that's it. No more crying, moping, sulking or being depressed. You get up, do a facial, manicure, pedicure. Whatever makes you feel really good about yourself. Then you plaster a smile on your face, get out there and face the world again.
Remember that there are a LOT of guys out there who are waiting to meet you and find out what a terrific person you are! So don't waste your time letting yourself get upset about this guy. Go out there and find one who can REALLY make you happy. I promise, there IS one.
Good luck!
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