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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!
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I put petroleum jelly on a tamping a couple times and I and really really really scared it will cause an infection but only on the applicator.
Anything can cause irritation if your skin is extra sensitive.
But nope, it isn't known to cause infections. Infact, I have used petroleum jelly for lube during sex on the occasions that regular lube is absorbed or washed away too quickly. And I and hubby have never had any reactions to it.
Also,
In the past, like when I and my siblings were babies, mom used petroleum jelly to protect babys bottom when it had a diaper rash, from the urine that would soak the cloth diapers, no absorbant disposable types then, let alone all the diaper creams available today. Urine on raw skin would sting and hurt worse than lemon juice on a paper cut.
I decided to add an article link about petroleum jelly and use vaginally. According to the article, the test cases were convoluted, some women who douche which cause good bacteria to be washed away which then makes them more suseptable to getting vaginosis. They only claim that it 'may' cause problems, not that it 100% for sure is the cause. Read it yourself and decide. But again, I use it often enough and never have a problem but I also never douche, am very aware of my body and am into natural health cures such as use of cranberry juice for bladder infections. You can't believe every report you read fully these days. While each report may contain a nugget of truth, the rest can be stuff that does not apply. For example there are reports about every food and item we put into our bodies. You have to really read closely, do the research yourself on the ingrediants and then make the best educated decision for your health. Some reports will say that a particular junk food "may be" good for you because of an ingrediant in its make up that promote heart health or lowers cholesterol. And while that might be true if it was taken in large amounts, in the product, its only 5 % while the other 95 percent of ingrediants are bad for you and more than outweigh the 5 % goodness of one item. It's absolutely ridiculous, all these reports, as if they're created on purpose to confuse and scare people. Be ware of anything that claims that it "may be" good instead of "is" good. The claim using IS, can be scientifically proven, and 100% sure by tests and studies done. However the words "may be" are used to prevent getting sued later for a false claim, studies and tests that were not exclusive on one item and had many other factors to give varying answers to the test. For example, in testing for allergy to grass, if grass pollen was mixed with tree pollen and then applied to the skin and there was a reaction, it is not 100% for certain that the subject is allergic to grass pollen, they may be reacting to tree pollen and have no problem with grass. Its these kinds of misleading tests that I pay no mind to. I pay attention to my own body. If your body reacts to it, then get treatment from a dr. and dont use again. But if your body has no problems, then I wouldn't worry about using it to lubricate a tampon. I'd worry more about forcing a tampon in on dry skin and possibly risking giving fine stress tears to the delicate skin of the vagina which would then be at a greater risk to getting an infection.
http://treatingyeastinfectionathome.com/petroleum-jelly-tied-vaginal-infection-risk-study-use-products-doubled-odds-bacterial-vaginosis-researchers-find/
The other day I was just thinking about how mad I was at my family, and I know that most kids who get abused don't say anything because they think that all families are like thiers. And I just remembered many instances that I wasn't sure if they were abuse or not, so I wanted some opinions...
- When I was like 5/6/7 years old, I remember that I hated milk and orange juice, and that if I didn't drink my whole glass, my dad would get really mad and tilt my head back and hold my nose so I couldn't breathe, and pour the drink down my throat to make me drink it. Sometimes I would start to gag and my mom would tell my dad to stop, but he would tell her to be quiet. And say that from now on, I would finish my drink.
-My sister would verbally and physically beat on me a lot (she's bipolar, though). But one time imparticular, when I was 11, She was yelling at me and her voice cracked, and I giggled just a little bit, and she kicked me hard in the shin/calf and I fell on the floor and started to cry and she told me it was my fault and I deserved it and told me to go to my room for being a b-tch. Did I deserve it? I did laugh and laughing is rude, right?
- Same sister, when I was like 7, she would.. um.. kiss me, a lot. When our parents were gone. And if I asked her to stop she would hit me or tell me to be quiet. so.. I let her. I can only remember this happening once, though. And another time a few days later, I think.
..Thanks for your opinions.
That was abusive behavior your dad did and could possibly have stemmed from how he was treated emotionally, mentally and physically as a kid. Or he could have had a mental illness of his own, one that may not have been severe enough to be spotted in public and but when home and not having to be on best behavior, a person with mental illness will let whatever is deep down inside them come out. And that stuff can be very abusive behavior, or more obsessive stuff that drives people crazy but doesnt harm them in any way.
Its likely if your sister is bipolar that he had something too. From telling mom to be quiet when she protested, and she did nothing more to step in, she feared him, he most likely is a controller, which could be narcissistic. No matter what label you give it, it is not a healthy thing to grow up with.
Children are created with an ability to forget and bury deep inside the things that were bad experiences, like a temporary amnesia. This is because as children, they have no way of protecting themselves, unlike an adult who can choose to subject themselves to such treatment or remove themselves from it. Since you are not an adult yet and likely still living with the abusive father and sister, you'll likely need to continue to live with it, or if it becomes too much for you emotionally, threatening to take you into depression or you feel you physical safety is threatened, then you will need to let authorities know. Start with school counselors. If they aren't helpful, you can check with CPS, Child Protective Services. While you're no longer a child, as a teen, you are still not an adult. If needed, get this kind of help now.
For later, once you are an adult:
The subconscious mind of a child is all the ugly stuff experienced is buried. It can't stay buried forever. This is only a temporary protection to help a person cope until they reach adulthood. At some point in adult hood, it begins to surface in different ways, either emotionally, mentally or physically. If physically, all of a sudden you are having all sorts of illnesses coming up that you didn't before, or you are having bits and pieces of memories, or having nightmares, etc... then a professional is the best person to see at this point. They can help bring any unpleasant memories fully out and help with any residual effects it may be having on you.
Since memories are surfacing already now, I cant say whether there will be any serious effects from it or not.
But if you begin to notice more severe changes occuring, only professional help will begin the healing process. Your dad as an abusives/abused person is unlikely to understand or care about getting you counseling. If it ever affects your ability to concentrate and do well in school, its time to get help from school counselers. Counseling is a long term solution. A more direct path is seeing a hypnotherapist who works directly with the subconscious where the effects of the abusive was buried all this time.
Ok, so I have been dating this girl that I love and such. But my freinds, literally, all of them, hate, her. And I have been freinds with them for my whole life, so I thought about just dumping her, then I noticed that she had been getting a little clingy lately, and finally, we got In bed, if you know what I mean. Then I had to stay with her, but I just don't know what to do! What should I do, stick with my freinds, or stay with my girl?
I really don't know if your friends all saw something in her that sent up warning signs. If they did, perhaps what they said to you, you took it to mean they hated her which may not be the case, they may just be trying to protect you since they have known you much longer than she has, really care about you,and may have some idea's of what is not a right match. It is hard for all of us to see the truth clearly when we are intoxicated by the feeling of love and romance and looking through rose colored glasses.
Now if your friends have this reaction with every girl you have dated, then there's a problem. Either they are selfish people who don't want you to find happiness or in each girl they saw you consistantly picking the wrong type. Sometimes a person will do that, they somehow always meet the losers.
I can see one or two friends thinking this girl will steal your attention away from them but not all of them, so my vote is to take their cautions seriously.
Take things slowly on the relationship, meaning no life long promises. If I interpret your words correctly, you're saying that you and her have become sexual lately. Having a dating relationship that includes sex does not mean one has to stay with that person forever. I know no other way thats better to discover if someone is sexually compatible with you than to become sexual with them. All else may be wonderful about a person but if what they think great sex is vs what you think great sex is, varies greatly, thats a sexual mismatch. It isn't the best idea to stay with someone out of a feeling of obligation if the sex is a mismatch. It will bring problems later in the relationship because one or both are not truly satisfied in that area. The chemistry is either there or it is not.
Next point: You mentioned noticing that she is getting a little clingy lately. What you and I think clingy is, or compared to what she is actually doing may differ greatly.
A true clingy person is someone who needs a person in their life to feel whole, to lean on all the time, because they don't feel complete on their own, they have no life of their own, and their self worth is wrapped up in the other person.
If what you are interpreting as clingy has occurred pretty much recently and wasn't present before, then it is not the clingy I described above. This is more of how a female acts towards the man she feels comfortable and intimate with and loves, this is a special bond that builds over a period of time, that makes her want to be closer, touching him more in intimate ways, but not necessarily sexual, such as playing with his hair, coming up to him often to give him long hugs, cuddling up to, stroking his shoulder as she walks by, lots of little kisses anywhere on your face, Lacing fingers with you, etc...you get the idea.
Most emotionally healthy women will act this way toward a man who is becoming more deeply special to them, its a normal response.
I also have no idea how long you have been dating her. Dating is either a social thing people do with no intent of being attached, or to discover if the person is the best choice for someone to remain together with long term which includes marriage. It might be best to be honest with each other, and find out which of the two each of you is looking for. Not all woman, but some can be intimate with and even sexual and not be looking for long term commitments so don't assume anything, just have a good talk.
And then, if you are looking for long term, do you feel you know enough about how she is in all situations, not just on a good day but what she is like to be with when she is stressed, sick, unhappy or sad, angry, does she hold grudges, or get jealous or does she maturely talk things out? These things cant be learned in a few weeks or months. Sometimes it takes a year or so and it is learned faster when living together cus you really can't hide things then.
Once you really know what you are up against in her character, personality, her moral standards, what she believes in, what she is passionate about, etc... and you are okay with it, then it should not matter what your friends think. Your life is yours to live and not for them to live vicariously through you. If you begin to see things that you know you can not live with, like someone insecure and jealous, controlling, abusive towards you, unable to keep to a budget--spending as if there unlimited funds in her account, these and other things will kill a relationship over time...some sooner than later.
Maybe your friends saw something in her, if its there, you'll eventually see it if you spend enough time with her.
Good luck sir.
its been 2 months since i haven't seen him, and if i don't see him soon then i wont see him till february which is in two more months. i am crazy about him, i know he is my life, and im willing to skip 4 days of school and a lot of money to see him for a week and a half. all my friends tell me its stupid, but i want it so badly, my heart is telling me yes yes yes!
I agree with the other person, $1,000 of your money isn't worth blowing on a short trip. If he wants to see you as badly, have him pay your way and costs and put up the $1,000 to see you . Otherwise, call and skype until then.
how can i have sex but stay a virgin without a doctor finding out ?
I'd like to build on what Adviceman said. It is true that today, most people consider 'virgin' to mean one hasn't had vaginal sex. However it is a bit of an antiquated way at looking at becoming sexual. For example, two gay men or two lesbian women, don't have the right parts to have vaginal sex. So really, at what point is someone no longer a virgin, when they've given a blow job or had one?
Discovering our sexuality starts first with becoming comfortable with ourselves, exploring our own bodies and sex organs and masturbating. When ready to make the next step to having a sex partner, it can happen in stages, from kissing to vaginal sex and everything else in between. Since a dr. cannot tell if you have had sex, he would have to ask if you have. And yes, its all kept private and confidential. There is no reason to lie to the Dr. if they do ask if you've been sexually active, they will likely want to know only if you've had pain with sex or if you're on birth control and having an side effects, that sort of thing.
You can get pregnant without vaginal sex. All it takes is precum or some semen from the penis getting anywhere near the vaginal opening or some of it being on his hands as he fingers you. Usually at this stage a guy isnt wearing a condom yet and so its still easy enough to get accidently pregnant if not paying attention to these details. For this one reason, I prefer to suggest if you are considering becoming sexually active that you get on a more trust birth control, one thats already set up in your body, either taking a hormonal bc like the pill, or the non hormonal IUD if you get reactions on the hormonal ones. The IUD is a good investment as it lasts 7-10 yrs once placed in utero. But you would use the condom to still be safe against STI's.
i always wanted to see Neil Diamond on stage i mean he came over to nashville on october the 17th 2005 but after that when he started touring the us again he did not put nashville on any of his us tour dates nither has he done it last year which lead me to thinking that nashville might have banned him from doing so is that stuff true will he come back to nashville when he returns to touring the usa or will he go everywhere in the usa expect nashville if you are not familar with his music please dont lie to me about him touring nashville
I really would have no idea. I do not go to any concerts myself nor do I follow closely any singer or actors.
I suggest you look up fan clubs and ask the question there because someone may know. Heres a few sites I found by doing a search under
'neil diamond fan club'
www.neildiamondhomepage.com
neildiamondfansandfriends.com
neildiamond.com
www.fanpop.com/clubs/neil-diamond
recently on tv theres this stupid redneck show called Duck Dynasty that everybody became obsessed with expect me and worse of all Willie Robertson brought his butt to cornerstone when he wasnt suppose to im serious what can you do get that show cancelled so everyone will stop talking about it and move on and i hope there are nomore stupider programs in the future
The complaint of one person will never make a difference over the millions of fans such a show has.
For some time, peoples minds have become "Zombie-ized" for lack of a better term, alive but dead as far as being capable of rational thought, productive ideas, a free thinker, having good taste in things, etc....
I can't say why but I am old enough to have seen teens from my time all the way to teens of today and people today are way more 'stupid' than those of the past. Part of it is lack of good education, but the other part is the brains actually incapability of any high level of intelligence. Why is that? Who knows, maybe the toxins in our environment stunt the normal growth of a babys brain to begin with..its just a guess...probably not exactly right but obviously something in the world is affecting the brains of humans across the world. Its sad really.
im really sick and tired of this adult swim it started to come on cartoon network in 2003 and in 2004 they were pretty stupid and raunchy they evend added Family Guy which they had for years im glad they throw out Futurama and the Brak Show but they also added that stupid American Dad Robot Chicken Venture Brothers and Metalocaylpse and they replaced King of the Hill with that stupid Cleveland Show and Childrens Hospital seriously where did Cartoon Network go wrong i miss Cartoon Network when it did not have that nasty Adult Swim when they had good cartoons and such what i want is to get rid of Adult Swim and get Cartoon Network back to the way it was it can keep Adventure Time and the Looney Tunes Show so anyhow if you have any links to where i can go to get that Adult Swim taken off post me some thank you
I wouldn't have any idea. I don't even watch TV anymore and never have watched Cartoon Network. My best guess is to do a search for Cartoon Network on the web and write to them.
You do have the option to just not watch such shows. If enough people complain and ratings go down, only then will any show, cartoon or not, be taken off air. If it's on the network, that must mean enough people love it so it would be like shooting themselves in the foot (rating wise) to take these cartoons off the air.
ive been told that once and that only thing in music would be from now on is an mp3 download and ipod but seriously i have been to places that sell music and newer cds are still being made so will they go away or continue to be sold
Thats rather like saying that the only movies anyone will be able to watch at home will not be DVD's but downloads.
What of the people who don't own a computer, or their computer died and they can't afford a new one yet. Are they to go without music or movies for entertainment. And the entertainment industry would not be making as much profit as possible if their music/movies can only be downloaded for pay on computer and not all people have access to a computer.
Technology keeps advancing so who knows what look or shape music and movies might have in the future.
Just think, 25 years ago, the first computers were being sold and shortly after that, the first cell phones which were the size of a brick. I dont think CDs are going to disappear.
I'm 19years old and anemic.Last Tuesday I went to clinic so they gave me some iron deficient supplements as well as Trigestrel pills to regulate my periods because they were heavy.The same week Friday night ,my boyfriend and I had sex while taking those pills at night as told.On saturday they became dark and they've stopped 'till today.
I'm kinda like worried that I might be pregnant or maybe those pills stopped my periods.
Please help
Here's a link that answers all birth control pill related questions.
http://www.webmd.com/sex/birth-control/birth-control-pills?page=4
According to the info in link, when starting the pill, you should use a back up method of birth-control, (spermacide, condoms) for the first month of taking it. If you were ovulating at the time you had sex, then it's almost for sure you're pregnant.
Plan B, the morning after pill originally was believed effective only if taken within 3 days after unprotected sex, now new statistics say you're protected a few days longer if both pills taken at same time. Theres a link at the end of article i posted link to.
What doesnt make sense is what you said happened the day after you had sex, something got dark? and something stopped til today. Not sure what time span we're talking here and what stopped and started.
Did you have sex while having a period, if so, most likely you were safe. A period is an unfertilized egg and the lining for the egg coming out so there's no pregnancy.
A pill is not supposed to bring on a period, it rather stops it. All active pills are only supposed to be taken for 21 days. Either your pack has 7 different colored pills to take that are placebo's meaning no active ingrediant in them so during the week you take them, you will have a period, or you are given a pack of only 21 pills and are supposed to remember to not take anything for 7 days and then after that, start the next pack. All this info is in the link I posted. If you ever have a question, maybe a symptoms your having, side effect, it's best to call your gynecologist office and ask them. The receptionist will have a medical asst. talk to you. If you went to Planned Pregnancy, then call them instead to ask your questions.
So i just transferred high schools and i am a girl who is a Sophomore this year and i went to my very first football game!I don't really get in much relationships because i usally worry more about my school. I was at my very first football game and my friend knew some older people that go to our school. one of her friends (which is a guy) knew the guy that i currently like. Me and him did playful eye contact in the halls then we started to talk over facebook for 4 weeks straight every day after school.He finally asked me for my number and we would text all the time and he would say goodmorning and goodnight he would always tell me how i was a good person and i was so beautiful all the time.We started to grow closer and closer i hung out with him and we kissed but after he sent a text "i want you" i took it the worng way of course and i didnt quiet like what he said because i do not want to have a sexual realtionship wtih him.The nest day at school he didnt talk to me much and ditched me to hang out with other girls which i mean its not that big of a deal but i felt like i was trying to be proved somthing. The he started to hug the girls and i started to hug and talk to more of my guy friends as did he. Then the text started to go away and we wouldent talk anymore he even wrote me a song. then we got in a disagreement about how i wasent sure if he liked me and i was so confussed because he sent me mixed signals. He told me that he liked me and that we should hang out more and that he missed me but then two days later he got a girlfriend but he still gives me the eye contact and when i look up he looks away and he just dosent look as happy as he usally does. He cant look me in the eye and he changed the wways he goes in the halls so he dosent have to see me. i dont understand what i did wrong and i don't know if he likes me still he acts like he likes me and i think he just expected me to be sad over it but i just dont know...
I cant tell for sure but he may have had some expectations or beliefs in his mind of how a dating relationship should go. If this started at the beginning of the school year, then the two of you haven't been together long enough to have built a bond of deep friendship, and respect and caring for each other. This initial attraction and chemistry is good, it is enough to want to spend time together and to talk and even kiss and hold hands. But for a young teen who may or may not have had her first sexual encounter, it is way too soon in the relationship for him to be hinting at wanting sex with you and expecting you to be so ready to do so. Sex just for sex sake if thats what a person wants is okay. But the most rewarding kind is when there are deep feelings for the other person and they have the same feelings back...its not one sided..
If he still looks at you but tries to avoid you, maybe he really does have feelings and was hurt because he meant something else by those words "i want you" like I need your company, i am lonely, lets hang out. The best way to find out what he meant, even after all this time, is to just ask him. The two of you need a real good conversation of asking each other questions and explaining your stances of how you feel.
Let him know there are no wrong answers and ask that he be truthful with you. You both must be truthful so that you can see where you do and don't agree.
State your boundaries and expectations. If he doesn't wish to abide by them, then obviously, no matter that there was initial attraction, you aren't right for each other.
You will find that just because there is initial attraction, the person isn't automatically perfect for you once you take the time to spend time getting to know each other.f
I am dating a guy at the moment. We are together for nine months , but I don't feel the way I felt for him in the begining.I just don't love him anymore.He loves me a lot.If I break up with him now , a blame is clearly on me.My best friend is always really serious about relationships and she want me and my boyfriend to be together.I didn't tell her anything yet.I am in a break with my boyfriend.I have no idea about what i should do now.What do i tell him?What do I tell my best friend?Please Help!
There is such a thing as dating for the right reasons and breaking up for the right reasons.
How you live your life and who you date or don't date should never be the choice of anyone else, including your friend. For her to expect to have control over what you do in your life is wrong. Somewhere along the line you may have spoiled her by doing whatever she wishes all the time, never what you wanted.
Let her get angry. And you tell her that your life is yours to live and to have control over and you are not going to give control of your life to someone else to dictate what you should or shouldn't do. Your decisions are yours only to make whether they end up in a loss or gain, a mistake or a blessing.
If you dont feel the same way about your guy as you did in the beginning, what you felt in the beginning may not have been chemistry with him but new relationship energy which lasts a month to a couple of months and in rare cases up to a year.
What is your reason for dating? Make sure you are clear on that. Just looking for companionship? Wanting to fit the norm and be part of a couple? Doing it cus its the thing to do? Or are you checking out guys to see which one might come close to being someone you could live the rest of your life with, someone to fall in love with, someone to love, support and uphold you.
Dating has become more of a social event than a tool to discovering things about a person to see if they would make that right life partner. Your friend does not understand dating if she thinks that you commit yourself life long to the first guy who shows interest in you, no matter if there is no chemistry and you don't have things in common.
So if you want to break up, it should be because you have finally realized that you and he are not a good match. You've actually given it a good amount of time to see if it worked instead of giving up too early. But at this point in time, continueing to stay with him is pointless.
You could mention that what you thought was attraction and chemistry with him was in fact not that because it wore off. What you felt was new relationship energy instead.Here's what wikipedia has to say
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search
New relationship energy (often abbreviated as NRE) is a state of mind experienced at the beginning of most significant sexual and romantic relationships, typically involving heightened emotional and sexual receptivity and excitement. It begins with the earliest attractions, grows into full force when mutuality is established, and slowly fades over months to years. It carries an implication of contrast with the feelings involved with "old" or an ongoing relationship.
There's this girl who is my "friend" but sometimes she is such a bully and makes me cry. Then, she'll go right back to being "nice". I try to avoid her but I can't. Is this bullying? What can I do? I've tried confronting her but it hasn't worked. Anyone have an idea? All advice welcome. :)
Since you didn't give a few examples of whats being done or said, it's hard for me to answer whether it is really bullying. But according to articles i read online, verbal abuse and emotional abuse and physical abuse are all forms of bullying. Studies have shown that an alarming amount of both boys and girls do at least the verbal bullying which is hard to prove if not witnessed by someone in authority.
Again, more studies point to the fact that it is a learned thing, learned at home. Since you've confronted her about it and it hasn't worked, when it involves children being bullied, what I read online stresses that it is important to bring the parents in on it so they can do what they can to help and talk to school officials.
I will share that I was verbally abused by kids in school. I was very shy and didn't have a strong self esteem and took things too personally.
So even a good natured teasing by a good friend would make me uncomfortable. Today as an adult as I hear similar things said to me, I realize that half of what I struggled with was not bullying but joking around. There is such a thing as intent behind the words and the tone of voice in which it is said, things kids & young adults still lack the skills to identify easily. But I will admit too that from what I saw a daughter of mine go through in school, bullying is more widespread today than in my time.
It doesnt sound like she is part of a group attacking you, just the one individual. If so, perhaps there can easily be a solution found to the problem. This girl may come from a home not as nice as yours. She may hear lots of yelling and verbal put downs directed at her and siblings from very stressed parents who dont think about what they are doing when they feel a need to release stress and do the wrong thing by dumping on the kids. She may not know any better. To her, this is normal every day behavior and she would not have any idea how to act different. Many kids don't realize that there are other ways people live, until they are visiting at their friends homes. I taught my kids that kids who picked on them likely had miserable lives at home and were acting out all they know so it's not really a personal attack. My daughters were taught to not take what is said personally. If it is a statement that is made to make you upset, you can verbally reject that by saying "I reject that. It's more important for your subconscious mind to hear that. They only have power over you if you choose to believe their words. The moment you entertain a statement they make or think it over too long in your mind, it will take home there and you begin to feel miserable. Tell your mom first. I dont know how old you are but perhaps your mom can find a way to invite this girl over to your house and with mom listening from behind closed or keeping an eye out can spot what is going on. Perhaps if this girl sees how your family treats each other, she will realize there is a different way to cope with life and other ways to interact with and treat others. Or your mom could say, Annie, that is not how we treat each other in this house. While you are here, I will expect you to talk nicely to all of us and being loving and supportive instead.
It's not silly and it worked at the younger ages. I did this often for my girls when they were young. Part of what made them feel strong enough to stand against anything abusive that came their way was having a mom who understood, was supportive and got involved. You know that saying, "There's strength in numbers" ?? I believe its true. Right now you are alone in this with no one on your side. Get Mom to help.
My sister says I have irrational fears. (4 phobias, and 13 fears) I would like to go to the school counsellor about them but I (unfortunately) am too scared. Like, I don't want to waste her time or interrupt her. What do counsellors talk to you about? What do they do to help you? Does anyone have answers to these questions? All advice appreciated. :)
I went to a counselor once but it wasnt because of fears, mine was emotional distress due to stress, burning the candle at both ends. Really, all they do is talk to you. They ask questions about you and what you are experiencing, it took many visits for her to get to know me well enough to be able to start making suggestions. It helped having someone to talk to. It is important to have a counselor who personality wise and their style of talk and conversationalizing is same as yours.
One thing to know is that all our emotions and feelings originate from our subconscious mind.
I will say that some fears can come from things that happened in your lifetime so far.
Not every counselor will agree with the next, but it is my belief that reincarnation and having past lives is real. If so, our soul may somehow have memories from a past life of scary experiences that it carries with it to a new life. In that new body, a souls memory is transferred to the subconscious mind, not as a memory but as the feelings behind the memory.
For example, I've read of hypnotists working with people who have fears who under hypnotherapy go back in their minds to a past life and witness the event that gave them a particular fear, such as a fear of water was a female who died in a drowning in a past life.
Counseling is a more long term solution to helping you get over phobias and fears. Although you will need more than one or two sessions with a hypnotist, this method seems to get right to the issues faster by dealing directly with the subconscious mind where these fears/phobias come from in the first place.
As a kid, your parents will likely take you to whoever their insurance covers. Once you reach legal age and can make decisions for yourself and if the years of counseling have not helped...earn your own money, find a different counselor or try a hypnotist that specializes in working with patients who have fears.
20/f
I've struggled with my faith since I was in high school. It started when I didn't think I was leading the life "God" wanted me to, so I started going to church more. I read my bible every day, prayed constantly, changed how I treated others, and even tried to clean up my thoughts. However, the more I read my bible, the less I believed that there was a god. Then I started researching. Long story short, I don't believe there is a god and I've been an atheist for about 2 years.
I'm not ashamed of that in any way. In fact, my life has improved greatly because I don't feel restricted by religion. I don't mean that I sleep around and do awful things without fear of consequence, I just mean that I do things for their moral value, not in hopes that I'll be rewarded after I die.
My problem though, is that my family is SUPER deep in their Christian faith. My grandparents raised me in the church of christ. While I'm okay with their beliefs, they strongly influence our family. I get dirty looks if my tattoos are showing, no curse words are allowed, etc- while those are all things I can deal with, it's things like their homophobia I can't comprehend. It's honestly stressing me out with the holidays coming up. They don't know I'm an atheist, and half the conversations they have involve topics we would STRONGLY disagree on. I can't even enjoy time with them because their views differ so greatly from mine.
My uncle in also very confrontational and I'm just afraid that if I speak up, there will be a huge ordeal and I don't want my family upset with me.. especially for something I don't think ANYONE should have a problem with! Also, I don't want to be afraid to voice my opinion. My question is, if there is a confrontation, how do I calmly deal with it? I know I'll want to scream and feel the need to defend myself which will end up making me look dumb. What do I do??
Glad to hear you've learned to think for yourself and realize that what is represented in church is so messed up. I think it hurts as many people as those who think they've been helped. What we believe spiritually as far as being souls is concerned, is a personal thing. No one can tell you what to believe. Unfortunately, many Christians do that very thing thinking they are truly doing something good. You are in a tough situation.
Unfortunately, voicing your opinion on religious or spiritual matters or beliefs is not going to be taken as a friendly debate club dialogue because (i used to attend church too so I know) they are extremely worried that you are going to hell if you don't believe as they do and they want all their family with them in heaven. (not believing in reincarnation also contributes to why they act as they do)
So anything said in just a friendly non confrontational way to voice your opinion,, is like poking a stick at a hornets nest, you are going to get a whole lot of something you don't want. I'd advice you do not join in on any spiritual topics. If they try to ask you questions about your beliefs or of a spiritual nature, just say in a nice tone of voice, "Look, we've been over this before. Lets just agree to disagree. "
Bring a book to read or crossword puzzles book and busy yourself with focusing on that, even if its hard to do. Excuse yourself from the conversation. There is no such thing as a one sided argument. Let them ask questions, you don't have to answer them especially if the uncle is trying to goad you into a conversation with something like, "Aren't you worried about going to hell."
The one thing you want from them, unconditional love, give it to them. SO all you have to say is "I love you Uncle Joe," And smile. And go back to your book. You might even try asking if he wants a hug. Its very hard for another adult to fight or pick fights if the other person is smiling and hugging them.
i meet this guy in August he's 31 im 23..i've grown a lot of feelings for him..he says he has feelings for me too and can see us together in the future but just wants to take things day by day and isn't ready to commit right now...but he's constantly saying he.thinks im beautiful and too good for him.he always concerned about me talking to my ex...we had sex for the first time Saturday and he said he didn't have condom and i told him i didn't have birth control. he said he'd be careful. ...he came inside of me and didn't even try to pull out..and said hopefully i didn't get u pregnant. .then he says im not ready for kids but if i was to have a baby i would want it buy you..then he starts talking being a family and so on...does he love me, or is this an accident or is he trying to trap me bc he doesn't want t comit but doesn't want me with anotherguy..
I sure hope you took Plan B, the morning after pill, its effective range was originally thought to be 72 hrs after unprotected sex but new research says 120 hrs. Here a link about it.
http://ec.princeton.edu/pills/plan-b.html
I highly suggest you take the precaution immediately.
Zane is right, you don't want to be messed up with this guy and especially not as the daddy to a child of yours. He sounds controlling to me too.
If the guy isn't incredibly immature, there's always a chance that if he said the things you say he did, seeming to contradict himself, that he may have a mental illness as well or he is playing head games with you, that is NOT the action of a person who loves you. Yes, get away from him, cut off all contact and find yourself a better guy.
I've only made out with guys and by now I feel like sooner or later I'm gonna go further more likely sooner. And I'm just wondering is it weird if you get fingered by a guy and you cum on his finger or you discharge on him?? I know that I get off easily if I'm hooking up with a guy I get horny so that's why I'm saying i know it's gonna happen. But I'm just paranoid if I get fingered like the last thing I want is for him to pull his finger out and be disgusted. I take very good care of myself and hygiene but I think that would be gross or that they would be grossed out. Also if your getting fingered like as the girl what do you do?? Just keep making out with them or what haha? Thanks
It's not weird. Its perfectly normal. You were gushing, getting wet. You may be a squirter, or in other words, capable of doing the female version of ejaculation.
Before I continue, you didn't mention contraceptives, if on any. With the fingering and all, its better not to rely on condoms cus he can get his sperm on his finger and transfered into you that way. Best to be on other birth control and do it asap. See your dr. or go to Planned Parenthood. You could get on hormonal bc, like the pill but if you get side effects, you may want to switch to the only good non hormonal one, the Paragard, copper IUD.
Most likely he fingered you correctly to get a g-spot orgasm. With this kind of orgasm, females release a liquid like guys do. guys usually get a charge out of having a female who can do that. It's not gross to them, many really like it. There are only a few who out of ignorance of what is happening may believe the female is peeing on them. Empty your bladder before engaging in sex so you can know that whatever comes out is not pee. The one thing you need to realize is that earlier on, you will have the thicker creamy cum You can also have the more watery fluid which can gush out and wash away any lubrication, so don't feel bad if you need to relube. If you find you tend to do more than a few drops of liquid, then use a towel folded up under the person who is on the bottom. It'll save having to sleep in a wet spot. Some women can leave soggy spots the size of a dinner plate.
I am attaching a couple educational and informational videos for you to watch. You might share these with your guy. Get informed cus your sex education is up to you.
The first couple are from Univ. of Ore. Med School
Anatomy and Physiology of Orgasm men and women
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WVL_GudwAOI
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BnEJ6bcVFsI
Lastly, Laci Green a young gal, very entertaining and funny but her information is right on.
G spot
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yz68K2qAlkE&list=PLTXiNEUzXWKTfNYKThSk-kmJdf7AJRP5KSex%20before%20marriage%20laci
Squirting
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UHIUt83srvc
my partner has gone to his family in another country for several months. at first we texted occasionally and called around once a week. for the last 4 weeks i have heard nothing. last time we spoke all was fine. i thought i would give him some space for a couple of weeks so as not to pressure him as he is around family. then i called and texted and called again. phone was off and no reply. what should i do. i want him to come back but dont want to pressure him.
There is nothing you can do but wonder. And the possible scenerio's and explanations in this situation are so many. Try not to jump to conclusions as our minds are prone to do when we lack enough information. Eventually, he is coming back since you said he's only to be gone a few months. If he does not return at all, then you have your answer, you were not important enough to him. Or if he returns and does not contact you, you have a right to know if he feels differently for some reason so that instead of keeping yourself available for him, that you move on with your life and find another partner.
My opinion is that if two people were truly in love and perfect for each other, there would be that invisible drawing to each other, especially when apart that nothing could stop it. But "Absence making the heart grow fonder" only works if there really was a fondness to begin with.
While a phone can be broken, there's always the internet and email or whatever social network you keep in touch on. Perhaps a family tragedy has his attention captured for the moment but eventually, as a person processes thru that, there should eventually be that longing to be in touch with a sweetheart.
If it goes beyond the time that he said he would be away and you still haven't heard, I would email, or text him a message asking for the courtesy of a response so that you can know if something has changed on his end so that you don't keep sitting around staying available for him if it's all over. You'd want to be able to move on.
i have 3 days using this pills and i hav had an unprotected sex.will i fall pregnent?
Here's basically what online MDs and Gyns have to say about when it's safe.
(1) ALL women are protected AFTER 7 days after starting oral contraceptive pills, no matter when in a cycle they start.
(2) Use of a backup plan for 7 days is recommended if pills are started beyond the 5th day of the start of a period
(3) If you start pills early in your cycle (within 5 days of the start of a period) you are protected immediately, however this won't apply to those who don't have predictable regular cycles or those who don't follow their regular cycles closely...in which case point #4 should be followed.
(4) If any woman is in any doubt, she should use a backup contraceptive for those first 7 days of taking birth control pills.
You said 3 days, it's possible it was too soon depending on where you were in your cycle so it would be a good idea to take a pregnancy test.
it makes me mad to think of those things i mean ive been asked several times if i was married or dating which im neither and im not exactly ready for marraige and i do not know if im going to date or not but i dont like those kind of questions thatb idiotic people have asked im just not obsessed with dating or marraige so how can you make people stop asking you those questions
It just occurred to me that your issue might be with exactly who is asking these questions. If it was a stranger who was attracted to you and just wanted to know if you were married or in a relationship or open to dating, that is totally appropriate for such a person to ask if they have any morals at all and won't try to date someone who is married or already in a relationship. Once you've given your answer, it's highly unlikely the same stranger will approach again.
If it is those who are acquaintances, old friends you don't see regularly or mom who wants grandkids, and other relatives, then you need to be firm and let them know you do not appreciate being asked these types of questions because its personal. It really is no different than asking personal questions like, whens the last time you had sex or how often do you fight with your boyfriend or husband. It is just plain rude.