about

My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.

The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.

advice

I moved away to get away from my Mother, My ex bf which who lives with her and my brother. I move and met a wonderful man and I was diagnosed with BiPolar Disorder for years and the meds were not working there or here so I took myself off. Now I am out here I feel so close to my pets back home and don't want nothing more than in life to be with them. My apartment won't let us have pets here and I am totally depressed without the dogs. My family always been negative in my life and I feel like being here and trying to start a new life and its been shambles. My bf has 2 daughters and a son that are grown and one lives here and you might as well say the other daughter lives here too and the son is a career felon and they bum off us all the time money and eat our home out of food. I am on SSD and I cant work or get the motivation to get out of bed. I feel sometimes let my life go and I can be somewhere else not here or at my mothers. I would love to get treatment but my insurance sucks now since i Moved to another state and my ssd is getting cut. I feel like dying inside with all this and at my breaking point. What can I do before this closes?

You really need to get back on your med. The living situation you are in is not helping you either. You need to get out of there. Your boyfriend may be a wonderful guy bu the living situation is less than optimum for a person with your illness.


If he is given the choice of you or his children he of course will have to pick his children. So don;t give him that choice. You need to find an environment that will pick you up not pull you down. You also need to get back into treatment for your illness. Medicaid may be your answer. Check into it.

[view]

Is there any way to explain, in not such a really long, confusing way like they do online..The difference between a democrat and a republican?

please and thank you,
I have to decide in order to register.

The biggest difference between the two parties is the difference between being a Liberal and being a Conservative.


The Democrats are seen as Liberals.


The Republicans are seen as Conservatives.


To explain more than that would take more space than is available here to answer a question. What I suggest is if you are registering to vote for the first is that you register as an Independent. This will allow you to vote in the General Election in November. If your state has an open primary or Independent candidates running in the primary elections you will be allowed to vote in the primary election in your state. If not you will not be able to vote in the primary elections.


All general elections are open elections. Meaning you can vote for any candidate and not by party unless you chose to vote by party. By registering as an Independent you guarantee your right to vote in the general election while you decide which if either party you wish to support by registering at a later date as a member of that party.


In the mean time you can attend the different party events and meetings in your area to learn more about the parties and their philosophies of government. To see which party best fits your ideals of government.

[view]

I'm 15 and so is my boyfriend. He and I have been dating for about a month and 2 days now. I love him to pieces

I don't think you are going to like my answer but you need to hear or read what I am about to say. It is important that you learn about men/boys with this type of personality as if you don't you could be physically hurt in the future.


Anyone who displays this type of desire to totally monopolize your time is someone that has a controlling personality. If he wants to be with you at all times he will also want to tell you who you can see and not see. He may not be doing it now, but later as his personality as a controller matures this is how it goes.


I know you say you love him and I'm sure you do. At your age he is a first love; there will be others before you find your true love and marry. It is in your best interest that you let him leave. Better yet you should tell him you are no longer interested in him and he should find someone else, that you have a life and since he can't except that it is better you stay apart.


Men/boys with this type of personality eventually build to a point that if they cannot control you with words they get physically controlling. This type of controlling usually leads to the women/girl getting beat up and ending up in the emergency room.


Mark this up to a life lesson, a very good life lesson to know who to stay away from and to find someone that will respect you and love you. People with controlling personalities do not love or respect others as others do. They get very jealous of those they think they love and end up hurting them.


Send him on his way befor you get hurt.

[view]

Hi ,
I am in this relationship for the past year n a half. It started off as a family friend proposing this guy but we ended up meeting in private n falling in love before this could happen the formal way. His parents were totally against it since they thought he could do better and I was not their choice. After a long battle he convinced them.Engagement n wedding dates got finalised and broken off in a week since his mom kept constantly trying to find faults with me n my family n spoke rudely to my dad. with such things happening me n my guy ended up fighting over everything n he complained about our fights to his family n my dad. Hence I had to call it off. But we still love each other n panning to still make it work . he is going abroad next week n is going to settle there. He wants me to settle things with his mom n marry him in few months. M not sure wot m supposed to do since his family totally hates me. And my boyfriend hardly has any communication skills,and doesnt wish to talk to his parents anymore regarding this. Is it worth it? staking my self respect n family's ego? Any suggestions?

The fact of the matter is just this. It is you two that are marrying each other. The future in-laws can accept this or they can reject this, that is up to them. While life would be better if you both had your parent blessings you do not need it. You are the ones that need to be happy together.



If the two of you feel that you can marry and build a life together and be happy. That is all that counts. If you do marry and build a good life together then your in-laws will see this and hopefully see the error of their judgmental ways.


One would also think that you and your husband would eventually want children. It is surprising how grandchildren tend to soften parents up when they become grandparents. There is of course the possibility that your parents and in-laws will remain judgemental and obstinate. This is something you must be prepared for.


Good luck and I hope I have helped.

[view]

what is an orgasm? i have an idea and I'm in health right now in "the unit" but it's never talked about and i don't want to embarrass myself and ask.

There are some questions that are almost impossible to answer and this is one of them. Mainly because you asking about something that when explained looses something in the translation.


How do you explain a feeling that is a bit different for everyone and each time? This is what your asking. In general it a feeling of total high with a big and sudden relief of all sexual tension.


Like I said it loses something in translation. You might try googling it for a better answer.

[view]

I'm scared to think and know things can actually go up my vagina. like ew! people like finger and touch all over it and stick their finger up it! tampons and guys "part" goes up. but like that's where pee comes out and like why would anyone want anything stuck up there of even touch it? I'm really confused. in health I'm learning so much at one time and its really hard.

You do not say how old you are and I am guessing you are a pre-teen by what you have written. As you get older you will learn things that will cause you to change your mind.


For now though lets correct one misconception. Pee does not come out of your vagina. Pee comes out of your urethra which is located above your vagina. Between the vagina and clitoris which is the nub at the top of your Mons.


When you get your period, you and your mom should discuss whether a tampon or a pad is better for you to use. If you are athletic or like to swim a tampon would be better than a pad as you can go swimming with a tampon also there is less chance of leakage during exercise.


Mom or sex ed class will explain the rest.

[view]

My guy friend is getting a lot more touchy feely and flirty lately, this week he grabbed my thigh, and pokes my butt with his binder, and tickles me a lot, and today he kept trying to put his hands up my shirt, on my stomache to "warm his hands up" and did it more at our locker trying to tickle me. then when we hugged goodbye after school he put his hands up my shirt again. Why could this be?

thanks.
i'm 17 btw.

It would be nice to know how long you and your BF have been together.


To answer your question; your boyfriend is definitely taking liberties as they said back in the day. You sound as if you may not want him taking such liberties or not ready for them yet in this relationship. He may feel your relationship is at the point you our ready to go with him to the next level which is one of physical familiarity. This of course will lead to what he hopes will be eventually physical sexual relations with you.


This of course is only my opinion. Being male and having once been a teenage male myself; I am fairly certain my opinion is accurate.


If you are not ready for touchy feely with him then tell him so. He should also know this type of behavior is inappropriate in school. something that based on the zero tolerance of this type of activity in the school system where I live. Could get both of you in serious trouble at school; should a teacher or principal observe you two.


My advice is if you are not ready to go to that next level with him say so. If you are then you need to tell him he needs to back off at school so you two do not get into trouble.


He is showing you where he wants to go in your relationship. Know you have to tell him if you want him to back off. If you are not ready to have sexual relations, and I suggest you not be, then tell him so. Also tell him to keep his hands to himself if that is what you want.

[view]

Me - 20, 21 on April 4th; My boyfriend - 22

My boyfriend is a very sexual person, I tend to be as well. Usually when we have sex, I'm the one whose on top, mainly because he's quite a bit heavier than me. I notice that he's better at thrusting than I am, which he attributes to being the one with the penis.

He's tried to have sex in other positions with me, and I have had a hard time with this. I want to have sex in other positions, as well; he's only two years older than me but is more experienced than me in the bedroom, so I'm worried that he's going to think that our sex life is boring eventually. I'm the eighth girl that he's slept with, not all of which he was in a relationship with; he's only the third guy for me (and I think that he'll be the last), all of which I have been in relationships with.

How can I adjust my body to having sex with him in other positions? He's also tried anal with me, and he has rarely been able to succeed. I'm extremely flexible, and it's a stereotype that the best thing about dating a girl whose flexible is that two of you can have sex in different positions.

You are not the first person to ask this question. In the past I found a URL for the Website I have included below. I believe this site will give you more than enough different positions to try with your boy friend with pictorial figures as instructional guides.


http://www.menshealth.com/sexpositionmaster/forher.html

[view]

Some parts of the following are kinda embarrasing so bare with me. So I am a 13 year old girl. I go through these weird two phases that are SO different! One of them is masterbation. I don't normally do it but if you averaged it, probably twice a month. The other phase is wearing diapers and watching baby shows. Nobody knows about either of these phases. And these phases come randomly. Right now I am going through both of them and it is really wierd!!! I have masterbated, made homemade diapers, and watched Baby Lonney Tunes today. Ugh, the one phaes that bothers me the most is the masterbating one. Because it is possibly a sin and I am Christian. There is nothing wrong with watching Baby Looney Tunes....

First things first. There is no sin to masturbation. According to a recent survey I read 85% of us do so. Included in the survey was the opinion of most of today's recognized religions. Not one condemned masturbation. It is hypocritical to condemn something when they themselves are doing. If you do the math 85% is 3 out of 5 people masturbate.


Now the diaper thing; that is called a fetish. There is nothing wrong with having a fetish. This particular fetish may have an issue other than a sexual issue. If I was a doctor, which I am not, and I were to go all Freudian on you. I would say something in you wants to go back to a time when you felt safer and more loved.


This is something you need to think about. At your age if you feel this is a sexual issue that's fine. You are doing exactly what you should be doing. Exploring your sexuality. If it is not a sexual thing, if wearing a diaper and watching cartoons makes you feel safer. Then you need to talk to someone about this as it is a problem.


It may not be a big problem now but it is a manifestation of something that is bothering you. You need to talk to mom or dad about this and let them arrange for you to speak with someone you can talk freely with who will keep your confidence and help you settle your conflict or problem.

[view]

Is there anyway I can use PowerPoint or make power points on an iPad?

Thanks in advance.

At the present time Ipad does not support those programs. Hopefully future upgrades or future genrations of Ipad will.

[view]

Hey I'm 19 and a single parent I have no friends at all I spend my days with just my child parks play centres etc..I don't really know how to make friends jus needing advice of just some kind words would be nice :) I am a brilliant mum my child comes first before everything but once my childs asleep I'm alone noone to text ring or talk to hope sum1cud help :)

Relationships need a solid foundation to build on. Relationships are like anything else we do be it buying a car or a house or even clothing. You need to find away to get past the outer attraction to find the inner beauty. In the case of relationship building part of the inner beauty is our intellect and inner make up.


If you are to find someone who you can build a relationship with you must first find someone with whom you share a common interest. The common interest is the ice breaker by which you get to know each other and communicate with each other. Communication is the key to laying down the beginning of a foundation to build upon.


Sit sown with a pencil and paper, yes make a written list, composed of those things of interest to you. They could include things such as cooking, hiking, Church, photography, reading, history, so on and so forth. Once you have made your list number them in order of greatest. Start with your top 5 items interest to you.

Get out your local newspaper, not the daily, the weekly one if your town has one. Look in the section of clubs and weekly events. See which of your top 5 interests has a club or event happening in your area get a babby sitter and go to the event(s) or club(s). If it is a club continue to go to the meetings. If you like the club join and participate.


By joining different clubs and going to different events of interest to you; you are building circles of influence by which to meet people. Through these circles of influence you will make friends who will have friends they may want you to meet.

Common interest and communication are the building blocks of friendships. Friendships are the foundations of relationships.

I hope I have helped.

[view]

im 13/f, im 85 pounds, and i can call myself pretty(: its okay to think your pretty and fit right? Never have i ever hugged a cute boy, dated, had my first kiss, made out, lost my virginity, humped, nothing! is that bad? im 14 in 5 months. i feel like everyone has! especially dated, hugged, or had their first kiss! i havent, is that bad? plus my parents are super awkward, and i would never talk about boys in front of them. if i dated though, it would be a secret. should i be worried?

Your more normal than your friends are. Most of whom are doing more bragging than actually doing. This is normal for many teenagers your age; to brag about doing things they haven't actually done that is.


Your 13, you have just entered your teenage years give yourself to grow, mature and experience the world around you. Most of us didn't just jump in the pool and start swimming, we had to learn how. Dating, kissing and sex all have a proper time and place which is different for all of us.


You say your parents are super awkward and if you dated you would keep that a secret. I have to advice against that as it is not safe for you to do so. As a parent and someone old enough to be your grandparent it is extremely important that parents know where their children are and with whom they are with, especially with their daughters. This is for your safety.


If you feel that their awkwardness is over the issue of dating I have to confess that I too would be very restrictive on this issue at your age. As I said above you just can't jump into the pool. Group dating such as mall dating and group movie dating or bowling and ice skating in groups would have to come first. Their is safety in numbers.


It is not that you parents or I do not trust our children. We don't know the boys therefore if we are going to error we will do so on the side of safety. So so will give you a chance to learn what dating is all about by being restrictive in how, when and where you may socialize or date. Yes there is a double standard here. A daughter will always be her fathers little girl even when she is married and has children of her own.


As for sex; that is a whole other subject. Something I would hope you put off doing until your older and much more mature than you are know. Your body may be capable of adult sexual relations. But your body and you have not matured to the point of being ready for sex. As I said this is another subject. One I would be glad to discus with you in another message.

[view]

i'm 13 1/2. i never knew what sex was until this year in eighth grade. im in health now learning about it! its a lot to take in and very scary! once im learning about it, all i see EVERYWHERE, is SEX SEX SEX. why is sex like everywhere?! i never new how many people have sex all the time. on here there are thousands of questions where people had sex! what's with the world all about sex?

You have asked a very good question. One I ask myself often while answering questions from people your age and even younger. As someone old enough to be your grandfather I will try to answer some of your question. This question though should really be answered by sitting down with mom and asking her.


Remember one thing about us adults; we were once your age. We have gone through everything you will go through. Mom has dealt with boys who are going to be all hands and begging you to have sex with them. She can help you deal with these boys as she had to and learned maybe the hard way how to do so. This is the type of sex question you can and should talk with mom about.


Why is sex every were? Well for one thing sex sells. If you want to sell something put a sexy girl in the ad. Put a sexy girl in revealing clothing next to a shiny car and men want that car. Put skinny models in women's fashions and every girls wants those cloths so she can look like the model.


Puberty plays a big part in why sex is every where you look. You have new hormones floating through you. As a girl your body is under going many changes. Your finding out that these changes attract boys and you can use these changes to control these boys interest.


The boys also have new hormones floating through them. There bodies are changing. They now get executions, something they have little or no control over. These new hormones have them looking for sexual relief constantly. Talking about sex helps to find a willing partner, sometimes.


Remember one thing actually two things about teenage boys and sex. First, they confuse lust and love. They will say anything to get a girl to have sex with them. Second; When they do expect them to gossip about it as they can not keep a secret about this. They have to tell someone that they are now a man. They tell their best friend who tells someone else. With today's social media access by the time you return to school everyone knows you had sex with him and you have a reputation you don't want or need.


Sex is a very intimate thing to shared by two loving people who have invested in a long term relationship. The boys you are dating now are most unlikely to be the boy you marry. After high school the chances of you all seeing each other again are slim as you will all head off to college and different parts of the country.


It is up to you as to whom and when to have sex. It is worth the wait until you are in a truly loving relationship with someone you believe you can plan a life with.

[view]

hey..... im gay im 16 and i never really had a boyfriend or never even hung out with a gay guy. i cant find anywhere and i want a gay guy to talk to and get to know. do u think u could help me.

I'm not sure I can help you find a gay guy as your too young to go to the places where gays or lesbians hang out.


I do question why you feel you are gay. Based on what you have written; "never really had a boyfriend or never even hung out with a gay guy," I'm unsure as to how you can make such a statement.


At your age and sexual development it is not unusual to have sexual relations with a member of the same sex. It is part of exploring your sexuality. It does not mean you are gay or not gay.


I hesitate to put labels on things especially sexual identity and at your age. Teenagers can be quite cruel to anyone who labels themselves anything but heterosexual. It wrong that they do, they should be more tolerant of people that are different them themselves. But they are not because they do not understand and what they do not understand scares them. Even in today's more enlightened age.


As I said I am hesitant to label in the first place. If you have not had any gay or heterosexual relationships to judge from I would not put a label on yourself just yet. Experimentation at your age is expected during your teenage years and even into college. Labels are meaning less until you know for certain who and what you are.

[view]

okay i date,i gt turned on by guys but the only way i can reach an orgasm is if i imagine myself wth a girl,i picture bein pleasured by a girl,so does that make me a lesbian?and yes i have tried it with a girl before but when i was younger below 11 years,now im 18,but i date boys n never picture dating a girl!!its jus for pleasure

I understand your question; my problem is just how to answer you.


First of all NO, you are not a lesbian or even bicurious. I think we all fantasize about some things including sex. This does not mean we have to act on them. For some people these fantasy's can grow to the point of almost being a fetish. Meaning there interest in their fantasy is such that they will read about it, look at pictures of people performing the act or acts they fantasize about or even watch videos of people performing their fantasy.


The web is full of pictures and videos of different fetishes people may have. Not all the people who watch these videos actually partake in anything they view through watching them is a turn on. This does not make them weird, lesbian, gay or anything else. If you get pleasure from something and it does not physically harm you or your partner and you and your partner are consenting. Then what happens in your bedroom is between you and your partner.



I'm not sure if I fully answered your question so let me put it another way. If you like football or stock car racing does that make you a football player or race car driver. Of course not. So if you enjoy see two girls getting it on I'm sure your partner would as well. If you fantasize about it there is nothing wrong with that.

[view]

They seem ignorant when it comes to something really affecting me. Whenever I'm around cigarette or any type of smoke, strong smells like cleaning supplies, or sometimes even certain foods, I can't breathe. It literally feels like my lungs shut off and I can't get air. But when I tried to tell this to my Mom, she didn't even seem to be listening and kept talking over me (telling me to do a chore or asking me an unrelated question). I finally gave up and just walked away frustrated.
I sometimes randomly get lightheaded and stagger, but she simply says "what's up?" and doesn't respond when I tell her. She says it like its fake and I'm just playing around. But it's SERIOUS and she acts like she doesn't care.

I'm sorry your parents are ignoring this problem. Sometimes we parents are like that for we feel are children are faking or making excuses to get out of doing something we are asking them to do.


Why are we this way. Mostly because we ourselves were this way when we were your age. Our friends tell us of their children's excuses for getting out of chores. In situations such as you describe the symptoms vanish quickly when the offending odors are removed or you remove yourself from the area.


Also Allergic reactions to odors is a new area of allergies to medicine, that is not well understood. Even doctors are a bit at odds over the why and the how of these reactions. Is the reaction physical or psychosomatic, The answer sometimes depends on which doctor you ask.


Personally I think it can be a little bit of both depending on the patient. While I am not a doctor I do believe we are capable of willing ourselves into believing certain things. Again this does depend on the patient and their medical history.


My advice: If you are over 14 you do not need parental permission to see your doctor or any other doctor. A federal law called HIPPA gives you this right. Your visit is totally confidential and nothing you tell your doctor, nothing the doctor examines or treats you for can be told to your parents or anyone else without your written permission. This is so stated in the law.


If you can get yourself to the doctors office then make an appointment to see your doctor. Tell the doctor what you have told us and go from there. If you can't get to the doctor then you might consider going to the school heath room and asking the heath assistant for help.


[view]

Hey there. I'm 21/f and I have a year left of college. After this, I really want to move from my house, even if I decide to go for my masters. It is just a very overwhelming feeling to feel like you can't do anything without someone getting involved. This is the most basic example. It is really bothering me. My mom has MADE me get hair extentions... yes, MADE me. If you lived in my house or knew her, you would know that she makes people do things. The reason why is because I had some damage in my hair and she wanted me to wear them so that the damage wouldn't show as much. For 2 months, I have not TOUCHED my hair. I haven't colored it, cut it, or ANYTHING! So, it has healed a lot. I feel that the extentions are in my way. I can never blow dry my hair myself. I have to go to this beauty school and pay $15. Right now, I can't wory because of my class schedule. It sucks. Next semester, I can work, because I can go back to the later classes. But, there is no job that will work with my schedule because it's all over the place. I can never let my hair air dry because of the extentions. I really would just like to not have them. I look at people's hairs after they've had extentions for years and I'm scared. I have had them on for 2 years, took them off, and my mom made me put them back on. Since I haven't colored my hair in 2 months, there's all sorts of different colors. It's not just my roots and the rest of the hair. The rest of the hair is faded out, so it's like I see washed out hair and then my roots. I just wanna even it out. I don't wanna use permanent color, but maybe like a toner or something. She would yell and scream at me if I touched my hair. It's just frstrating because it's MY hair. Even when I have had a job and paid for everything myself, this is the way she is. It's not about the money. My mom doesn't even have a job. She gets her income from a rentered property. I have had to work really hard when I had any money. I even got a scholarship from school, and she made me give her $1,200. Just like that, without even saying she would pay me back. I have had a lot happen to me with the past couple of years. I found out I was adopted and lost someone very close to me due to cancer. It's just something I want to do for myself and for my self esteem. Even out my hair and take out the extentions. Please help!

This problem is just as much you as it is your mom. Yes, you live at home and it is wonderful of you to live by moms rules. If you live under your parents roof then you should live by their rules.


But you are 21 and you are allowing mom to control you this is not living by her rules. Mom is a controller. As long as you allow her to control you she will do so. Moving out will not change this for you. Controllers have ways of controlling people who do not live under their roof.


What you have to do is grow a backbone and be 21 years old not 12. You need to tell and or remind mom you are now an adult. Legally you are responsible for your actions not her. You need and welcome her support but you also need to be able to do things as you feel are right for you as an adult. You will always appreciate her advice and give it its proper consideration. Though how you move forward is always from now on going to be of your choosing.


If you are not willing to stand up to your mother and make a statement such as I have written; there is no help we can offer you. Nor will you ever be able to crawl out from under her controlling apron. If you are ever to be in control of your life you need to stand up for yourself.

[view]

My brother passed away and left me some money. My sister inlaw says I should share it since her husband helped pay for funeral expenses as did I. The estate will still pay us for those expenses- is she right or wrong?

Your brother left that money to you. It is your money to do with as you please. The executor of your brothers Will should have paid any final expenses, including funeral costs out of your brothers estate. Any funds left over are then distributed as your brother instructed in his Will. Neither you or your brother should have had to pay for any funeral expenses, final expenses or any outstanding debts of your deceased brother. These funds should have been deducted prior to your inheriting any money.


The proper thing for you to do, though you are not obligated to do so. Would be to reimburse your brother for any funds he paid out for the funeral or any other final expenses. If you wish to share your inheritance with your brother brother that is totally up to you. By not sharing could cause a rift between you and your brothers family though you are not obligated in any way to share. Your brothers wishes as written in his Will are final and binding in law.

[view]

i got into michigan- ann arbor and maryland- college park. im stuck between both. im not really concerned about the prestige of the schools because i think theyre both good. i'm more concerned about the social aspect. ive heard the people attending michigan are either really snooty or sort of nerdy. i go to a very snooty high school where many people are very wealthy, and i've spent my whole entire life trying to weed out the snooty people to find the few normal, nice ones. i dont know if mich will be just like that. also, ive heard in michigan people are extremely competitive about school work and there is an uptight atmosphere in that respect. on the other hand, i've heard that michigan is sooo much more fun than maryland, and is all together a better place. any thoughts?

Prestige is important depending on the degree you are going for. For some careers where you earned your degree factors in to who will hire you, so the schools academic prestige is important.


On the other hand the ability to fully embrace college life and enjoy being away from home, for many what is the first time, is also important. Maryland is not the biggest party school in the nation but it is tolerant to a degree. Like all schools they have in the recent years cracked down on alcohol and other party items for the safety of all.


Maryland while offering a prestigious name in many degrees is not a snobbish school environment. You will find a good ethnic mix both on and off campus. What selecting a school should come down to is not in total the social party environment of the school. But what the educational environment of the school can offer you.


What do you need from the school to get the most from your tuition. This is not public school. You are the customer and the school is the supplier of a service. You have to ask yourself if this school is going to supply you with the service you want educationally first? As that is of the utmost importance. The social atmosphere is secondary.

[view]

I'm 14 years old..me and my noyfriend have been together for two years..we've been REALLY horny lately and we were going to have sex the other day BUT I don't like my body. We talked about it and he made me feel soo loved and he told me he loves my body and he loves me weather we have sex or not. I have been fingering myself alot. How can I start getting comfortable being undressed? Show more skin? Soo I can have sex ..

First your way to young to be having sex. Your body is still changing and maturing. Your fear of being naked with a boy or showing you body to him is sort of an internal alarm system to protect you from doing something you should not and are not ready to do yet. Listen to what your body is telling you.


We all have these little alarm systems as I refer to them. Even as adults these little alarms will go off. They are there to keep you safe. To keep you from doing something that you know in the back of your mind you should not be doing.


There is something you need to know about teenage boys. Teenage boys do not know the difference between lust and love. Once they hit puberty they become hard wired to have sex. They need sex to work off the sexual energy building up in them from all the hormones produced by entering puberty. They will tell a girl anything she needs to hear to get what they want.


Something else you need to know about teenage boys. When it comes to sex they are the biggest gossips ever. They have to tell someone; for once they have sex they feel they are a man. They tell their best buddy who tells his friend. With today'social; media connections before you get to school in the morning everyone knows you slept with your boyfriend.


You know have a reputation you don't want or need. I may be old but the only thing that has changed since I was your age is the form of communication. Even your girlfriends will gossip if you tell them or they hear about it. You don't have to believe me, you could ask your dad if you want. We may be old or older, though when it comes to teenage sex not much has changed over the years.


My advice is to wait. Hug, kiss, pet if you want but leave the big dirty, as it was called in my day to when you are much older, more mature and fully understand the ramifications of adult sex. Sex is something to be enjoyed. Not something to be done quickly, someplace hidden so as not to be caught be your parents.

[view]

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
eXTReMe Tracker