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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!
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Girl 1)
Kinda short
Thick medium length brown hair
Green eyes
Tan Assyrian skin
Nice smile
Wears a lot of makeup
Big boobs - Small butt
Nice curve
Flexible but not fit
Outgoing/Kinda Lazy/Not much talents/Parties/Drinks/Smokes/ Dependent/Sleeps around a lot and gives guys whatever they want
Girl 2)
Regular height
Long brown hair
Brown eyes
Tan Latina skin
Nice smile
Doesn't need much makeup
Average boobs - Big butt
Average flexible but very fit
Sings/Dances/Guitar/Piano/Smart/Skates/Chill/Artist/Independent and strong/Has values
I think a lot depends on for what reason you are 'choosing' a girl.
Not saying any reason is wrong, but you need to be sure First of
1. what you are after in a relationship and what type of relationship
2. be honest with yourself and discover what your personal preferences are in looks, character and personality.
Starting with reasons. Some people look for someone cus they just want someone to be social with, someone to go do stuff with, an activity partner basically and this would also cover the 'party type' girls who drink to the point they can't be responsible for any decisions they make and then sleep with any old guy that comes around.
Others may not know entirely what they want yet or do know but are using the dating forum as a way to meet girls and date long enough to learn what they don't like so they can move on to another and hopefully find things they do like. If the things you don't like, outweigh the few things you do like about her, then she's not the right one for you and you're not right for her.
The end goal for the second type of person here is to eventually find someone who can make a long term or life long partner for them. Usually party girl is not in the picture unless she has changed her values over time.
Many men who have finally matured in age and from experience admit to having gone first after the party girl cus she caught their attention easier but in the long run were not happy because they were not considering the personality traits so closely which aren't important when you just want someone to socialize with at parties or for dating or just sex partners. They wanted someone who wasnt so shallow in what was important to them. An example would be a girl more into saving her 'nails' than saving the whalefis. All that matters are her looks and a guy paying attention to her cus most likely she has a low self image and a guy choosing her makes her feel important and special if just for the night, a day or a couple weeks.
It is okay to have a natural preferance for lets say brunettes. I do...and I like men with long hair too. Can't say why, its just appealing but beyond that, its more important to me what their presonality is like, their hopes and dreams, if their beliefs, moral views, values, etc...
So if you are a young guy and not serious yet about finding a girl to fall in love with, with whom you have a best friend relationship and are each others sexual equal, then you look for the gal who is also not serious yet, the party girl. I suppose for you, thats girl number 1.
If you are looking for a meaningful, loving, and wonderfully intimate and sexual relationship long term, then give girl number 2 a try. She may not be the one for a long term relationship for you and you will have to keep searching but number 1 definitely isn't it either.
Whatever you do, be honest with yourself and with the girl you choose to approach. If you dont want to be serious, just want the sex and partying, thats okay, as long as you're up front honest about it. Girls don't tend to ask guys enough questions about his actions or what he says and means and just assume things and that brings on all sorts of problems. But if there is a girl who is independant and has values, has a good self image, and you want her to be a short term party girl for you, then don't pretend or lie to her and say you love her to mislead her.
Some aren't able to see your intent right at the start and you will end up hurting her, others will see that you are barking up the wrong tree so to speak and will turn you down.
Hi,
I've been noticing that you give very honest and humble advice. Not only have you answered a question of mine, but I've seen the answers you have given others and I like the way you think. So, in saying that, I would like to ask you a direct question. I'm not sure if you know anything about it, or if you can even give me answer, but it doesn't hurt to ask. It is kind of long so I completely understand if you don't answer right away, or if you don't answer at all.
Anyway, I've been experiencing feelings of anxiousness for the past couple of months. I've had quite a few things change in my life. I moved out of my mother's house, where I moved in with my boyfriend and two other friends, got a new job, and pretty started a new chapter in my life. My boyfriend and I spend pretty much every moment together, except when I am working, which is 7AM- 430PM. He just got a new job and today is the first day that he hasnt been home when I am, but he will be at 6. I've noticed that I have become a little obsessive towards him. Everything little thing I do, I'm thinking about him and how it will affect him and what he thinks. I've kind of lost touch with myself. When we didn't live together, he was always so excited to see me when I came over and gave me all of his attention. Now that we live together, the excitement has died a little. He says its because he has just become so comfortable with me and I love that, but I didn't realize that meant that he didnt have to show me as much affection anymore. I'm kind of getting off subject, but that was kind of a little back story. Now lets get to it... This feeling of anxiety I have can be very overwhelming at points, and it has affected living day to day life, but it's not every day that I feel this way... My mother and my sister have both dealt with anxiety & depression so naturally, I went to them for advice. They tell me to get medicated. I know that it has worked for them, but I wasn't sure it would work for me or that I even needed to get that extreme considering i havent tried any natural forms of relieving anxiety. I took their advice and went to the doctor. They proscribed me with Zoloft (which i thought was just for depression, but it also for anxiety, PMDD, PTSD, OCD, and some other things). Today was the first day that I took it and I felt fine up until around 11:30 when I started to feel this overwhelming feeling of axiety take over me. My chest felt heavy, I started sweating, I felt nervous, my hands started getting very clammy, a rush of heat came over me and my jaw got very tight. It was unlike any other feeling of anxiety I have had before. I'm assuming it was an attack. I talked to my sister about it and she said she felt the same way at first but in a few weeks (to a month) she felt better and in 3 months she felt great. I'm just wondering if this is even worth it. I feel more anxious now than I did without it, and I really don't want it to affect my life (work, boyfriend, sanity....) I am very unsure of whether or not I should continue. Do you know anything about anxiety or Zoloft? If not do you have some words of wisdom to help me get through this hard time?
When you went to the doctor, I don't know if you just described what you feel and that mom and sis have it and he just prescribed Zoloft or if the doctor did any testing on you to see if indeed you need the medication. The reason people get side effects and sometimes go through an adjustment period on prescription drugs is for one reason only, pharmaceutical medication are not something natural our body was meant to take in and do well with. They are formed in a lab and can never come close to 'mother nature'. I do not know anything other than that statement I made about pharmaceutical meds based on what I have read from places on line like 'natural news' and from what i have learned by going to naturopathic Doctors. Some times there are people for whom natural means have not helped for whatever the illness whether anxiety, depression, high blood pressure or cholesterol, etc... and the prescription meds take care of their symptom quite well but cause anywhere from one to 5 or more side effects that are also unbearable like cotton mouth, difficulty sleeping, constipation, etc...and now must take a 2,d 3rd or 4th medication to relieve those symptoms. So basically the body eventually gets used to living 'drugged' on the tons of medication that pharmaceutical companies make great money on and doctors are taught thats the only way to help and don't know any better cus they chose to believe what they were told, so they prescribe these medications and many get a kick back from pharmacyes for suggesting or prescribing their medications. Yes, there are some good caring doctors out there, but in todays world, it is better if you think for yourself and keep control of your bodies welfare in your own hands.
Yes, perhaps in time, your body will retrain itself to get used to Zoloft as your family did. Thats entirely up to you if you want to just go with it. You didn't mention trying any natural means first. If you could afford to see a doctor, I must suppose that you have insurance. So if you are having 2nd thoughts about the reaction you had and would rather know about a better more natural solution, then check if naturopathic doctors are covered by insurance. Such a doctor must go through exactly the same training as a regular general med. Dr. and on top of that all the training for natural health and the body so in the end, they can have more knowledge than a regular doctor and therefore know of what things to try. Since each persons body makeup is unique, one will find help with a certain herbal product while another does not. Same as with prescription drug medications too. But holistically speaking, a natural dr will look not just at the symptoms on a physical level but whole health meaning emotional, mental, maybe spiritual (not religious tho) Diet, lifestyle and other things can contribute to a problem. If you are daily taking Zoloft because you were given it, and then go to see a natural Dr. it may be harder for him to get a good reading of whats really going on for you when you are on that drug. Its really your decision to get a 2nd opinion now or not from a natural health dr. or just trust a medical doctor and pharmacy that have profit as their first goal and your welfare 2nd when I feel it should be the other way around like it used to be years ago.
As for the boyfriend seeming different, maybe he doesnt seem to have the same eager expression to see you since he does see more of you now. I suppose if you're needing that excited reaction when you come home, a pet dog will take care of that LOL...they're known to greet their owners enthusiastically at the door.
Considering what you are suffering from, I can't say what you are feeling regarding boyfriend is entirely accurate or true, or whether you are overthinking it. It may be best to look at that scenerio at a later date once you are to feeling normal and no longer suffering from anxiety or depression. I do have a list of things to do for depression but don't know if you have already seen that.
Scientists have found potential causes for anxiety and have broke them down into three parts, brain chemistry, heredity, and life experiences. The brain chemistry one is also what can affect and cause the problems with depression.
Between the feel good hormones that the body creates being low and having a negative thinking process, those two things I believe will account for a great majority of the depression and anxiety related problems many people suffer from today. I've said a lot and yet, its still your choice what you want to do next. Hopefully I've given you more things to think about in deciding how to proceed. Blessings dear and thank you for having such confidence in me.
20/f
I have small,cat-like metallic blue eyes. What make-up styles and colors would accentuate them best? It would be helpful to include links in your answers,but you don't have to.
Searches I did for cat shaped eyes brings up tutorials of how to apply makeup to make a non cat shaped eye look cat shaped.
I think doing searches for 'up turned' eyes will help you better in your own searches.
Heres a chart that will help you determine if that is indeed the shape and type of eyes you have.
http://www.beautylish.com/a/vcacj/whats-your-eye-shape
and e-how has lots of tutorials. Here's a link to one and you will see lots related to blue eyes on the right side to also click on.
http://www.ehow.com/how_2213034_apply-makeup-blue-eyes.html
20/f
I'm feeling guilty. Last year, I marked myself as a dependent and my mom had to go through the trouble with her accountant on trying to do everything and to grab my paper work. Because I was a dependent, I didn't get any money from my school but my mom did. She didn't tell me that she got $1,000 and she kind of went off to another country to go to the doctor.
I got frustrated because that summer, I had to pay for college out of my own pocket because I wasn't offered summer financial aid. I told her that she should have told me so I could save the money to put into my college tuition because I didn't know how to pay $2,000 dollars for summer, I didn't get accepted for any loans, and I worked in retail. It was too much money to try to get in such a short amount of time. So, I had to borrow money from my sister's boyfriend.
I told my mom that next time, I was going to mark myself as independent so then I can save money for graduate school. And she threatened me, saying how she won't pay for anything anymore. How she won't help me at all if I needed it. She never really did help me pay for anything, so I agreed.
2013, I started working more. I was still going to school. I pulled out a few loans since I was going to graduate in December. I was pretty much paying for myself and taking care of myself. I was planning on taking a year off after I graduate to try to pay off the loans, save some money for graduate school, go to the doctor, and pretty much take care of things I needed to do so I would not have to worry about it.
2014, I filed my taxes right when I got my 1098-t form. Two days after I did, my mom came up to me and asked for my files because she said that her accountant said she would gain more money back if we filed it together. But I was already done. Even though after that conversation a year ago, and even though I do have that plan, I feel guilty of filing my taxes without her. Did I even do the right thing?
You are an adult, even though college age. If mom wanted to put you as a "dependant" on her tax form to get money back, and to use that money for herself, none for you,
then that is something she should have discussed with you prior to putting you down as a dependant.
The reason for the "dependant" part on a tax form is because it is assumed that the parent is taking full care of their college age adult child while they are going to college and usually this means school full time and the child is not earning money or at least nothing substantial. The financial burden to the parent is being considered in, in regards to any tax refund or what a parent may owe in taxes.
I don't know how well you discussed it with her a year ago but you did say that next time you would mark yourself as independant and it would seem she understood by her reaction to threaten you.
If you are paying your own way in everything and your mom is not contributing a penny, then you are indeed independant.
Evidently, the tax person who did your taxes must have agreed (by doing and signing your tax form) that you are independant based on the information you supplied if it was all correct, otherwise they may have suggested that mom file you as a dependant because you are not truly in the eyes of the tax law, an independant. As far as I can see, you have nothing to be feeling guilty over. Your mom may not be ready to let go of you as far as dependance and is 'playing' the guilt trip card and also doesn't seem to me to have all your interests in mind. Often a parent will sacrifice their real needs in choice of taking care of whats best for their children. So its possible that mom has a selfish streak if she wasn't at least willing to share the refund with you, since if it wasn't for you, she wouldn't have had that refund.
You didn't mention if you're still living with mom or not, but she may throw a fit if you live with her and pay her some rent money and kick you out. Don't cave in and promise to let her have her way next time. Too often in attempting to follow the Bibles commandment to "Love and honor the parents" we mistake that love for handing over control of our lives, instead of taking ownership of our lives and our decisions. Attempting to please parents to 'earn' their love or doing the same with any other human will only get you stuck somewhere in life, unable to move forward because 'others' are dictating what happens in your life, like directing the "play" of your life.
In my school we have word study tests weekly. I'm in Greek and Latin roots, and I'm in 5th grade. I usually get good grades like 10/10, 9/10,and 8/10. But this time,I got a 6/10. My worst grade! I got four wrong, and only 6 right! The worst part is that I have to get it signed by a parent, and I'm afraid my mom will be mad at me, and I'll get in trouble. I once got yelled at for getting a 14/30 on a multiplication test (that's sports like the word study situation, right?) And I'm in the highest math group, exceed in science, get all the answers right in reading, and do great in theatre arts and sports. I'm afraid that I've set my parents expectations do high, that if I don't live up to it for the rest of my life, they'll be enraged. Please answer soon, I've gotta turn it in, if it doesn't get turned in in 3 days, an email gets sent home and that means even bigger trouble. My parents don't get mad over everything, and Steve very strict or hand out big punishments when I make a mistake, but school I'd the one thing they take seriously. What should I do?
A test is only a tool, to be used as an indicator of whether someone needs more work and study on an area. So getting a lower result than you normally do shouldn't be viewed as a bad thing.
There are factors other than just a lack of study, or a lack of understanding the material that can have impact on the results of a st. A lack of good sleep is one. Even if you went to bed on time, if your mind kept racing and you had trouble falling asleep or bad dreams kept you up, that could have an effect on ability to concentrate even if you know the subject matter tested on. Being ill, especially head colds that affect ones ability to think straight or really bad headaches, can and will affect ones performance whether at work on the job or at school. If you simply did not know the answers and got them wrong, then it means thats an area you need to study more.
In this case, you can ask the teacher what you can do to restudy that area and if a makeup test is allowed. If it isn't, I would still ask what extra work and study I can do to come to understand to part I messed up on. Whether it shows on your test grade records or not, at least the teacher will know you eventually got it, and you'll have the personal satisfaction of eventually learning it.
Your parents are only human and will at times perhaps have the wrong outlook or perspective. If you told them how fearful you were of them being angry over this test grade, perhaps they could come to the understanding that they need to be mindful to be more supportive and calmly ask what you think went wrong. And encourage you to do whatever you can to fit in studying the part you finding out did not get and follow teachers 'make-up' instructions.
The stress you would carry from fearing their reaction could affect your future ability in tests. And in time create a snowball effect that compounds until you begin to get lower grades on many tests, not because you don't know the material, but because subconsciously your mind is so emotionally focused on possible negative reactions from the parents that you can not focus on the test.
So all in all, you and the parents need to have a good talk together. Heres a hint for having productive conversation. No choice of wording that seems to point the blame or accuse.
For example: Instead of saying "You guys have made me stressed over one low test score because you always over-react and make me scared to tell you."
Instead say something like:
"I am feeling stressed out over one low test score because in past experiences, I interpreted your reactions as anger and disapproving and negative. I know you love me and want the best for me so can we talk about this?"
If they can sense they aren't being attacked, the parents are more likely to be open to hearing some information that may help them realize a possible need to adjust how they support you in school work. They may think their version so far is what is keeping you on track but at what cost? There is enough stress in the world today that having stress added to unknowingly from family, is definitely not a good thing. So you will just be bringing this fact to their attention. In your talk, stay calm, take deep breaths, try Good luck dear.
im scared that im pregnant.. i didnt have sex with my boyfriend i gave him a blowjob and thought i was pregnant but i got my periods..this happened two months back.. i got my periods last month also.. but now my breasts hurts..but its very very very minor. this has caused me to worry..am i pregnant? were those periods or implantation bleeding? my periods last for 7 days and the last two periods i got also lasted for seven days.. but im scared a lot.. please help
If you had your period, then you are not pregnant. Depending on your age and when you started puberty, your body could be still growing so tenderness in the breast is one of the symptoms of your body changing still from maturing because of puberty.
The only other thing I can think of, which you did not mention is if you are starting out on taking a birth control like the pill.
The hormones in contraceptives can give a female lots of symptoms of pregnancy, one of which is sore breasts. In case you are on it, and symptoms eventually become too severe for you, go to see dr. to get your prescription changed. Otherwise, you have nothing to worry about. You sound normal.
Ok, well I had this friend for years and now in high school but I kinda left him alone for 2 years to hang out with other friends but now he met someone else and now they hang out all the time. Now I have taken enough of this I have feelings for him like deep feelings for him. Every time they hang out I have hate feelings towards her. Does it seem that I'm jealous???
Feelings of jealousy are like an indicator light on the dashboard of your car warning you something is wrong, like a door ajar or oil running low. Jealousy is usually about a fear of something, most often fear of a loss.
It could be that you fear losing him because you are only now realizing that you really care alot or maybe even love him.
Some girls who have a boyfriend as a best friend can go on for years with him as an extremely close friend and never felt the "fireworks" hit like it does when you are attracted to other guys, cus the love for a guy in some cases, sneaks up on you, growing slowly stronger over time and yet the couple may never have been romantic and kisses, held hands or snuggled.
I can't say if you missed your chance with him by neclecting the friendship for 2 years.
When it comes to him being attracted to someone and hanging out, if he hasn't yet made a commitment to date her, there is no reason why you can't tell him how you feel if you are ready to start a romantic relationship with him if he still feels the same about you. The best thing you can do is to ask yourself why you didn't want to spend the 2 years with him? Was it that you only exclusively had him as the one and only person you socialized with and never anyone else? That isn't healthy. But to swing the other way if this is the case and not have hardly any contact at all is the opposite extreme and also isn't healthy.
You need to find a time to have a private chat with him if he will agree to it. And explain to him why you avoided him for 2 yrs, and apologize if apologies are needed. Next I would state noticing him hanging out with the girl and ask if he has made a commitment to her to date her? If he says yes, then congratulate him. Ask him if you can still be his friend and spend time chatting with him or if he thinks the other girl would not like that.
If he says he is interested but not really dating her,
Then you might go ahead and explain nicely and calmly without any accusations or emotional outbursts, how you felt once you saw him paying attention to the other girl. You were surprised to find yourself feeling this way and it made you realize how special he is to you and the depth of your feelings for him which go way beyond just good friends or best friends. Ask him if he thinks you have any chance of being not just his friend, but his girl. If he is open to that, then proceed into dating.
I have been taking Birth control for about 4 months. In the beginning of january I skipped a whole week (white pills) my step mom told me it was alright, and to continue with my second week as if I took the first. I felt so nauseous during the second week, I through up a couple hours after my pill. The last week came and I never received my period. It is 26 days late and I have an appointment 7 days from now, so it'll be about a month late when i go..I have been feeling sick, and have been having stomach aches. Just not feeling normal. I know Im bound to find out and I am ready for anything but I cant sleep thinking about what it would be. Im so anxious. What could it be?
If you are a non-sexually active teen who was prescribed the pill as a way to regulate your period, like having too heavy a flow for example, it may take a matter of time to find the right one where the type of hormone in the pill or the amount of it, suits you best.
The hormones can bring on the awful side effects you are feeling and in some cases, females are not experiencing these symptoms right away from the start of taking the pill.
Skipping a week, whether it was your active pills or the sugar pills should not be the cause of throwing up and getting sick like that because as with any pill, there is a week that the placebo pill is taken to give your body a chance to have a normal period.
If you have been sexually active due to the fact that you are on the pill, even missing one day let alone a week will greatly increase your chances of becoming pregnant.
And lastly, even though your period didn't come and you may need a different prescription, if the throwing up and sickness has only been a day or two, it could be just the timing and you caught a flu bug.
So my boyfriend has already told me what he has bought me for Valentine's day...tickets to see my favourite band which probably cost quite abit of money.
I'm now very stuck as to what to buy him-should I stick to smaller gifts like other people do or d I buy a gift of equal value to mine?
You've already been given good advice but I want to come at it from a different angle. Your boyfriend must really love you to give you such a wonderful gift.
Have you ever heard the the 5 different love languages? Everyone is prominent in one over the rest so the love language that reassures one person that they are loved will differ from what another persons love language is. And so, some gifts will be thoughtful but not be something purchased. The thing to figure out is what each others love language is and here is a list:
http://marriage.about.com/cs/communicationkeys/a/lovelanguage.htm
Although the author mentions these in context of a spouse, since everyone has a love language, it works for children too, family members, friends, etc...
If you think you might be pregnant , can you still use the trigestrel pills?
Take a pregnancy test asap while continuing to take the pill but just for a day or two until you can purchase a pregnancy test or go to visit a Planned Parenthood or your family doctor.
Having sex during any interruption of taking the pill can cause you to become .pregnant.
Taking the pills if indeed you are pregnant, does not make a pregnancy go away.
There are reasons for a period being late that don't necessarily mean pregnancy, such as recent illness or stress. If you . are experiencing some symptoms of pregnancy, they could simply be related to the hormones in your birth control pills, or be the real thing. So the thing to do is get tested today, tomorrow or as soon as Dr. can see you.
I have been married twice, and can only orgasm by myself. Never with my former or current husband. My current husband has cheated on me because he says that I am a bad lover, and if I don´t orgasm with him he will divorce me.
Your husband is not very educated about sex if thats his attitude.
Some facts:
A great percentage of woman have never had an orgasm in their life.
A good amount of healthy sexually active women have never in life been able to achieve orgasm with a guy during intercourse.
Women need a longer time than men to be brought to arousal to the point of orgasm, but once there can keep going on going but a good amount of men do not have the patience to work on her for 15, 20 mins or even in some cases much more time.
In case this is what he is referring to, it seems he's more interested in his own pleasure or his pride gets bruised easily. Something like this is not an excuse to go have affairs. Talking to ones partner if they are truly in love and going to see a sex therapist together would be the right thing to do. He isn't acting like he really cares about you to begin with. So for him to threaten divorce, I'd say "Go ahead, good riddance." because you can do better. So far, I'd venture to guess that you picked the wrong guy for you sexually, twice.
A woman is not frigid, she has just not been sexually awakened by the right man yet.
How can I say that? My ex called me frigid. The actual reality was that he and I were a sexual mismatch. He was never satisfied with me. I only had self given orgasms. I married him as a virgin never having had sex before. Bad mistake.
Ah,...the naivety of youth. There is an invisible something that you will experience with the right someone, for one thing, their kiss or touch alone can be enough to start the passions going because you have the same pheremones. Having the same libido's (how often a person wants sex) is important too. The ex was happy with once or twice a week and I wanted sex every other day, he didn't like certain things like oral sex, his eyes never lit up when he saw me undress from day one, etc... We tried reading self help books together, tried watching porn, eventually the extreme of his idea of going to a swing club, which I did. Thats when I first had orgasms with another guy ever. I am not suggesting that for you...just letting you know that you are not alone and theres nothing wrong with you. Just letting you know that eventually I discovered that there was nothing at all wrong with me. When we split, and I began dating, I wasnt looking just for a man who could be my best friend, but a man who would be my sexual equal. So I did check out any guy who I liked the personality, how he treated me, and the attraction was strong and the kisses very exciting and we'd talk about what we like sexually and whats normal for us...and yet, even so...once having tried a couple times with a guy, I'd find we still were not a match...perhaps what he interpreted as his way of being exactly like me sexually, did not come anywhere near what I meant.
So, I can't tell you what to do, I don't know your religious beliefs or whether theres children from the marriages, or what you're comfortable with but if the husband isn't willing to go for counseling with you, you may have to discuss divorce and start all over again, and this time, learn all you can sexually about your compatibility with a guy BEFORE you marry.
So my best friend (Let's just call her Lucy) and I have been close for nearly 5 months. It may not seem that long, but she means a lot to me. Well she recently moved to a different school a few weeks ago and came in contact with one of her old best friends (Let's call her Gina). Ever since she moved, Lucy has been telling other people and making statuses on Facebook and stuff like that saying Gina is her best friend and that she would die for her.
Well..... A few days ago, we got in a fight (Just a stupid tiny friend argument) and she started calling me names and stuff. Well she texted me recently and we had a good conversation and stuff, but I just don't want to lose her. Any advice please?
Its much easier to feel close to and develop a closer relationship with a person that you have more contact with....this principal is how it works whether for best friends and for dating relationships and marriages. A healthy friendship relationship is going to need quality time spent together which is pretty much impossible with your friend having moved to a different school. It is just natural to gravitate toward the person that is more easily accessible. Life brings changes like this that we can't anticipate. Also, as we mature and grow, we tend to develop new interests that might take us in a different direction than our friends, or one moves away to college in another state and meets and marries someone there. Keeping in touch with someone you were once much closer to is a good thing to do...simply to share whats going on in your life and update each other. I have done that with people who were once real close and have for one reason or another left my life due to new jobs, new homes, new schools, and eventually new relationships or interests that took up even more time. Its all part of life. We have to learn to flow with the changes and cope with how we feel like emotionally. Its not a situation your friend could help, the moving away part, so do not hold it against her or blame her for the changes that are happening because of her living elsewhere and picking up with an old friend. Try not to be bitter or jealous. Negative energies like these if you choose to wallow in them will send out an invisible shield that others in your school will sense and feel and tend to not want to approach you as a friend, tending to make you feel even more despondent and lonely. Keep up a cheery friendly attitude and look for someone who currently doesnt seem to have many friends, or perhaps someone new to your school. Let the school office and counselors know that you'd be glad to be a buddy and helper to any new students coming to the school, help them find classes, that sort of stuff. Some you may find things in common with.
I am a 15-year-old girl and I need help deciding between two boys. One I have liked for years, but we barely ever talk anymore, we'll call him J. One I just recently met and I'm starting to develop a little crush on him, I'll call him B. I've liked J since 5th grade but I'm pretty sure he likes this girl named Anna. B is sweet and all, but we don't has history like J and I.
It's not like I can just ask J out and if things don't work out skip over to B because they are rely good friends and don't date girls that the other has already dated to avoid arguments. So should I take a shot at J, even if the odds are slim, or try for B and get to know him and hope that I get over J?
Light of truth mentioned something important, about deciding what you like in a guy. So step away and start making that list based on what you have experienced so far. This means you really have to give it some thought. This list takes many many years and many experiences with hanging out or dating different guys to complete. But you can work with a beginners list. Anything can go on the list, even if its that you like: how his hair is styled or cut, the color of his hair, sound of his voice or his laugh, sense of humor, his good manners, his hobbies and interests, etc. Whenever you put something on this list, ask yourself why you like it? How does it make ylike ou feel? For example, my husband, and one boyfriend in my past, both have voices that sound soothing to listen to. Kind of like the smooth mesmerizing sound of voices of male DJ's on the radio. I find I tend to relax as I listen to such a voice. And yes, that may sound superficial but in a long term relationship someday which most of us long for, including marriage, being around someone 24/7 which the voice grates on your nerves, can become a problem for the relationship.
I know of some women who have successfully told the guys that she has interest in her that she is in the information gathering stage and is not going to decide to date one guy exclusively. I have done this too. Most guys if told this ahead of time will have no problem with you hanging out with one guy one day, and the other the next, or both of them together. This should work whether you're a teen, or at any age even older adults.
When you have spent enough time with both of them to get to know if you like one more or dont like either one enough to commit to a dating relationship, then let them know what your decision is. If you ever come across a guy who can't handle the idea of you hanging with or seemingly going on dates with several guys at the same time and want an instant commitment up front, this kind of guy isn't worth your time because he'll tend to be insecure and the jealous and controlling type. Those dont make good boyfriends or future husbands.
my boyfriend told me he cuts and i dont know how im saposed to act. should i act like it doesnt bother me or should i do somthing else?im a 12 yr old girl and i am so confused!
Most of the teens I have heard from who do cutting themselves, do so because they say they are depressed. When a person is depressed, they don't like how they feel and feel powerless to change the circumstances that brought them to feeling depressed in the first place.
There's a chance that your boyfriend is feeling some of that. It takes having trust in a person to confide in them so its a compliment that he feels safe enough with you to tell you.
I would let him know that I care lots about whats going on for him, so even if he tells me what he thinks is the problems causing him to cut himself, that its only a temporary diversion from and will not get rid of whats causing the problem anyways. So he needs to talk to an adult he also trusts who can help him to find a solution to his problem or counseling if needed. If his parents are the problem, then ask if he has an aunt or uncle or other relative who'd be able to help. But best is to tell a counselor at school because they are prepared already for these kinds of issues with kids and may have some suggestions for him.
Hi 15/F so me and this guy *̩s friends for a year and a few monthes. I really like him but I don't know how he feels. Should I tell him? And how?
I have seen someone suggest in a video that a cute way to do so is to write a note to hand him, in the note is written just one question "Do you like me?"
with two check boxes, one for yes and one for no.
Since you already seem to like each other enough to be just friends, I would probably put, Do you like me as more than just friends?
I don't know how much you chat on a regular basis but if you do talk a lot, it should be easy to slip it into a conversation. Like if he's done well on a test or whatever and you are complimenting him, "Thats one of the things I admire about you, you are so good at__________ and I kept finding more things I like about you, to the point that I am finding myself liking you as more than a friend. This is probably best said in person face to face. But If you're too chicken, I suppose you can text or call, it lacks the same impact if he can't see your face and find the sincerety and emotion there.
I really want to make myself (as a guy) squirt. I heard it feels REALLY GOOD.
I will assume that you already know how to bring yourself to orgasm by masturbation using your hand.
Since you used the word squirt, likely you want to know how to shoot your ejaculate.
When you go pee, force yourself to stop mid stream and hold it for 30 seconds and then go again, keep doing this the whole time you pee. This will help you build up a muscle called your kegel. At first, you may discover only being able to slow your stream a bit, or you dribble some, but with constant practice, after a little while you will be able to control this muscle better and use it at the right moment to shoot farther.
And then heres an article on how to shoot further.
http://wiki.answers.comQ/How_do_you_shoot_semen_further_during_ejaculation
While it's an interesting visualize effect and perhaps a guy gets some pride out of it as well as personal enjoyment, if you are already into strengthening your muscles and abilities for the purpose of shooting, which really only serves to bring you pleasure, may I suggest that you focus as well, or even more, on learning how to achieve multiple orgasms. This next article tells how.
http://health-fitness-solutions.blogspot.ca/2008/07/how-to-achieve-male-multiple-orgasm.html
Once you have learned how to achieve splitting the two functions of orgasm and cumming so they don't occur at the same time, you will be able to pleasure a female longer. Most guys end up done and needing time to recharge while the female got no where near enjoying any pleasure herself. When young guys recharge quickly. This ability drops rather fast as you get older. So if the guy doesn't know how to hold his ejaculation off and have several orgasms first, making sure the female is satisfied, and get her permission to cum, he will be more desireable as a lover. If you are a young teen, I suggest you wait a while on the pleasing a female until you are older.
As a female, I can say that having experienced several different men that know how to hold off their ejaculation, it is very arousing to feel them squeezing their pc muscles while inside, the sensation is of the penis pulsing, and this is done while still inside the vagina rather than while still in training where the guy has to pull out as in the article. So if you're gonna work on the pc muscles, have a double purpose accomplishment to focus on, just slightly different ways to handle each scenerio. Dont limit yourself to becoming just a shooting pro.
I am newly seperated. I was married or am married four years to a man who lie and stole from my entire family including my children. It was an " abusive" situation. Some call me a survier I call me an idiot. Long story short he left me. I ended up moving several states away. Not much of a choose. I am staying with family who help watch my children while I work, because my son is Autistic and doesn't do well with other baby sitters. I don't know anyone where I live other than a few people were I work ( tele marketing). I found a "dating" web site just to meet friends. Meet someone, have been dating a few months. He quit his job to start another one has not started the other job (union?) weather thats at excuse I am clueless. I was paying for his cigeretes when I don't smoke. When we would go out weather to a bar or what not. I paid. Finally I told him I am not paying for anything anymore. We started putting in applications so he says until he heres from the other job. We started fighting a lot. "Broke Up" gave in went back. I know what I want out of life just not out of a relationship and thinking maybe I am not ready for a relationship I just want friends someone to confide in. I dont want to be like yeah it is over after breaking up and talking it back out having a god conversation I dont know weather to continue working at this relationship I guess I am looking for what would you type of response.
Don't be hard on yourself. We all are allowed by the creator to make mistakes. What counts is that we learn from them. Since he left you and you hadn't gone through the process yourself to decide to leave him , my guess, is that there may be a remote possibility that you have more personal lessons to learn and a good way to know whether you have learned them is by being confronted with a similar situation in which you either cave in and get involved in an unbalanced relationship if not another abusive one....or the moment the guy reveals his true self and you see whats really going on, you stick by what you've learned and leave him. I am talking from experience. I gathered the courage to leave an abusive ex. One of the male friends I decided to date became possessive and abusive himself while I was in a precarious financial position relying on him. It was put up with his behavior to have my financial cares at the time taken care of temporarily, or dump him immediately. I dumped him. He knew my ex. Knew I was strong enough to leave him but might fail on the 2nd situation and cave in to him. When I did not, never heard from him again. Fate will not bring any more situations like your husband to you if you have been tested and are able to spot a user, or abuser, any relationship that is unequal. So as has been suggested already focus on yourself and the children. You have support from the family. Use this time wisely to heal from your experiences and put some effort into personal growth, just for yourself. Become a more confidant strong woman. When you are strong and confident, you increase your chances of attracting a better man. Be sure when you do go into another relationship, that you are free to do so, divorced, and not looking for a relationship to complete you, but to add to yourself as an already complete person. If you need another female to talk to from time to time, just write me through my column. I have done the web dating sites too and learned the do's and donts the hard way. And I discovered I was more than a survivor, I was an overcomer...and thats way better than merely surviving.
I am talking to a old flig i used to have 5 years ago.
We have been talking for about a month and the sparks are flying high for one another. A couple of days ago he had asked me for a picture, so i gave it to him. Yesterday he had asked me for another one, I said no because I had 0 and he had 1. He of course pleaded and begged me to give him one. So I asked for my friends advice and she said just to give him one. I ended up giving him 3 pictures b/c my friend said they all looked nice. I was waiting for him to give me one of him but he never did. that night he called me just wanting to talk. While we were on the phone he was texting someone, for some reason I have the feeling that he was texting another girl because what guy at night while he is talking to a girl be texting a guy? Am i right?! LOL
I pretended like it didn't bother me or i didn't notice. While i was on the phone with him all of the sudden it went silent like i was placed on hold...so i just hung up ...After my night shift ended and i was driving home thinking about what happened last night i feel like the idiot that gave him 4 pictures in total when i don't have any! and the texting thing while i was on the phone also bothers me....I'm so mad and so hurt that i just started to ignore him...well i guessed he noticed because now his text says why are you ignoring me? and idk what to say....any advice??
PLEASE HELP!!! :'(
Your P.S. of him not currently having a girlfriend, has me suspecting that without a sexual outlet, and his having a great need for one, that it may be the reason he looked you up again by calling. He wanted the photos, and to hear your voice cus if just photos of a woman would do it for him, he'd be viewing womens pic's on the net.
He already knows that he can get off with you due to having a fling in the past. What you may think was texting, or why the line went silent, just might be cus he was masturbating but didn't feel comfortable telling you.
It may have been ordinary conversation you were engaging in, not phone sex conversation so thats why you don't have a clue, but just hearing the sound of your voice along with your photos may have been enough for him, and a plausible explanation for what you experienced.
There's no way to know for sure though.
I see you noticed that he did not reciprocate with photos of himself to you. Pretending all was okay, and not communicating how you are feeling about the situation wasn't the best way to handle it. Good communication is important in any kind of interaction with another human being, no matter what the relationship.
But important to keep in mind when communicating, never to point the finger and make accusations of what you think he was doing, just in case you are wrong cus that will drive a wedge between you.
Honesty is still the best policy. You can tell him how you felt in your own words something like this:
When you asked why I am ignoring you, I realized that I subconsciously disengaged myself from talking with you because though we've talked, we haven't really shared information that is important as to why we are talking and flirting and sharing photos. I was hoping you'd volunteer that information without me having to ask and when you didn't and I wasn't sure how to ask, I began to ignore you. Yes. Here's my best explanation for what thought processes my mind has been going through:
When you asked for a photo of me and then for more, it felt odd to me, since we are not in a relationship. All we had was being mutual sex partners for a while which never developed into an ongoing relationship. So when out of the blue, 5 years later, you contacted me at a time I know that you do not have a current girlfriend and taking into account that you must have sexual needs and urges, I hope you can understand my wondering exactly where this is going after a month? If since you are single and also have grown and changed as a person and are ready to try a real honest relationship with me again, I am willing but I need you to be upfront with me about it. If since you have no current sex partner, you are only hoping to use me to fill the empty space, companionship wise, or sexually via photos and flirting until you do find a new girlfriend, I need you to be honest and upfront with me about that too. I may or may not be willing, but to assume it is okay without asking first doesnt totally sit well with me. I am seem like I am okay with it all cus I have been flirting back but I require something more than a superficial relationship, or a partially fantasy one via internet, photos, and phone. I am worth more than that. So tell me whats going on in your mind.
Then wait for him to explain himself. If you don't get any explanation from him, he's using you.
If he says he didn't know how to ask but would like to try dating you again now that you're both older and wiser, then if you are willing, say yes.
Guys can change.
If he admits he is wanting the sexual stimulation of pics(even clothed photos of you) the flirting via phone but didn't want to be so bold as to ask you if you;d be willing to have a sexual fling again, then if you also want to take advantage of it, since you don't have a boyfriend, agree to it with him, but be upfront that this is only a sexual thing until you meet the guy you will have a life long relationship with. Or if you don't want to be a semi sexual fling via the phone for him, be honest with him. Tell him that doesnt work for you anymore. You require more out of a guy.
Hey there! I'm asking for my friend here for some advice. Her ex and her broke up last Tuesday and she still can't get over him. Then today, my best guy friend (who had a crush on her) asked her out and she said yes. She doesn't know what to do now. She still can't get over the other guy but has a new boyfriend? What can she do? (She likes my best friend though but can't get over her ex)
When trying to get over a breakup, sometimes the thing that works well for lots of people is to find something to distract them, take their attention off of thinking about the ex. For some, it's a new activity or hobby, I suppose for someone else, a new friend or boyfriend.
If she said yes cus she wants the distraction, but isn't emotionally ready and may not continue to date the guy once she's finally processed through her breakup, then she needs to be honest with your best friend, tell him right up front that:
She isn't emotionally ready to get into another dating relationship, so she's trying to be honest and not get his hopes up that anything real may come from it. Since she's on the rebound, she's not even sure if she would really be interested in a dating relationship right now. She doesn't want him to feel disappointed when she can't be fully there emotionally and otherwise with him. She does like him as a person but whether it eventually could turn into a true honest dating relationship, she isn't making any promises.
If he is willing to just be a friend to her and be there to help keep her mind off her ex, no matter how it turns out, then thats good. If he was hoping for a girl fully ready to Date him, without hurting over the breakup, and can't handle her mourning for an ex while hanging out with him, then he needs to back out and be honest and tell her he likes her alot but couldn't handle that. He will wait for her until she is over her ex and then ask her again to go out.
I want to straighten my hair with a blow dryer but I don't want to ruin my curl pattern. Will my curls come back if I blow dry it with cold air?
You have the word 'straighten' and 'curl' in the same sentence. I am guessing you meant to type "I want to 'dry' my hair with a blow dryer..."
Using a blow dryer should not take your natural curl away. It's more likely (depending on your hair type) what you are doing with your hair while drying it may make some difference in how it turns out but only for that one instance. You won't permanently ruin your natural curls. If using a brush to shape the hair or pull it straighter it might change it a little, again depending on ones hair type. I have very fine hair but lots of it. I wear it long but want the natural loose waves. If I run a brush through my hair when blow drying, since I dont have tight curls naturally, I end up straightening and taking the waves out. JUst experiment with it. You can't damage the hair. If you are drying due to lack of time for it to air dry naturally, try sometime to dry it half way so it looks dry but is still feels slightly damp to your touch. And let it continue to dry on its own. I am sure you already know, that it is hot air and other heat treatments that over time damage hair.