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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
So I've been with my current boyfriend for a little while now, not a super long time but I'm much much closer to him than I've been to anybody else.
We're looking at getting our own place together and he's been talking about how he's looking for the perfect engagement ring. I see him almost every day and we really just fit so perfectly together and I never thought that would happen. I was one of those girls before this that rolled their eyes and thought all of my friends who talked about being in love were just victims of romance books and fantasies.
Anyways before him I'd never even gone further than making out because I never felt hot around any of my couple ex's.
With my current boyfriend something about him woke me up sexually and he drives me crazy and I'm tired of holding back because I'm scared of losing my virginity.
I'm very small and thin and he's much taller than me,athletic and he's large (if you know what I mean). We actually planned it out for Monday but as the day gets closer I get more scared and nervous about it.
I don't want to keep pushing him off of me though because I get so worked up myself. He's totally okay with us waiting but I don't want to anymore, I just want to get it over with so we can move past this point in the relationship. I mean we'll be living together soon but we haven't had sex.
I'm also tired of feeling pain when he tries to stimulate me with his fingers. It's just a horrible feeling for me and I don't want it to be like that and have to keep telling him to stop because I'm not used to it.
The other problem is if it hurts so much with just a finger I know it's going to be so much worse when he's actually inside of me. I thought about maybe having an alcoholic drink first but he's really against drinking and I don't want to make our first time weird if I get a little tipsy since I've only drank twice before (btw we're both adults).
I just don't want it to be this disgusting horrible,terrifying experience for me and I don't want to panic, freak out and throw him off of me or something.
What should I do about this? Should I take a pain killer or something first to numb me a little bit or will that kill the moment?
Any thoughts/advice (other than use protection I know that)?
I'm going to take a slightly different approach to answering your question.
What I have told others about there first time is that for the women there are certain things she has to have not only to make it memorable but to also make it comfortable for her. For a women to loose her virginity it is a major milestone in her life as it physically changes her. For the guy, frankly it is no big deal other than the embarrassment of a possible hair trigger the first time.
Your boyfriend sounds like a nice guy and is willing to make this a memorable time for you and as comfortable for you as possible. Now each women is different and the amount of pain she will feel will be different for two reasons. First is because we all feel pain differently. Second it will depend on how tense you are.
My wife tells me every girl has a fantasy of how, when and where she will loose her virginity. While each are different they have one thing in common which is a setting that is idyllic to them. They all include comfort and security in the surroundings which is very important for the women. For if she cannot be comfortable and feel secure then she cannot relax and the degree of pain she will feel will increase.
What I suggest is this. You and your boyfriend should find someplace to go for a long 3 or 4 day weekend escape. The goal is not to loose your virginity. If it happens, it happens. The goal is to become comfortable together. To be naked together and explore each others bodies by night in extended foreplay. You can even finish each other with oral or masturbation.
During the day the two of you explore wherever you have gone together. Maybe you have a picnic lunch packed and you spread a blanket out next to a stream where its just the two of you, lunch and a bottle of wine and nature taking its course. I'm not suggesting you loose your virginity on a blanket in the woods, but you can have one heck of a make out session for sure.
I believe that once you become comfortable with him and being naked with him in bed and actually sleeping together. Getting to the next level and having sex will come naturally and it will be almost painless if not painless for you.
If your boyfriend is the man you have described I think he will be willing to do this for you. After all you have saved a very precious gift for him.
I am a 24 yr old female. I have lost myself.. I have forgotten how to be happy... I have forgotten how to live my life fully.. And most importantly I have started hating myself.. I dont know why I am living.. Can any one here help me out? Everyone has his/her own share of joys and sorrows and I too have my share. But I dont find any interest in anything.. I dont know what to do.I want to be hale and hearty just I was about 9-10 yrs back.
Dragonflymagic took the long way around to suggest you may be suffering a bout of depression. Neither of us are doctors and diagnosing is something we cannot do. Dragonflymagic did an excellent job of describing one of the problems that is the bases of depression.
In your short note you hit several of the factors a doctor would look for in testing you for depression. There are ten factors or ten questions they ask. If you answers to the majority of them are signs of depression you would receive a diagnoses of, in most instances, clinical depression which is what Dragonflymagic explained. Clinical depression is the most common type of depression with 2 or 3 out of 5 people suffering from it at one time or another.
Stress is a major cause of clinical depression. Being your age you are just about the right age for clinical depression to be the problem.
You may just be finishing college. You have college loans to worry about and a poor job market to enter. This plus you should be at a point in your life where you should be able to stand on your own two feet yet you face the prospect of moving back in to the family home. It is just the way things are right now; a sign of the times one could say. Stressful, hell yes.
What to do about this. First you need to find out if you are clinically depressed. This takes a visit to the family doctor. He or she will ask you about ten questions. From these questions the doctor will be able to judge if you are suffering from clinical depression and to what degree. The doctor then may offer you medication to help replace the hormones you are not getting enough of, or he or she may suggest talk therapy with a clinical psychologist. Talk therapy will help you find out what is stressing you out. One found the therapist will help you find better ways to deal with that stress.
Your doctor may also suggest you see a psychiatrist for medication. Do not get upset if your doctor makes this suggestion. Your not crazy. Since these hormones are secreted into the brain a Board Certified psychiatrist is better trained to prescribe medication and monitor your medication then your family doctor is. Seeing a psychiatrist is actually better for you if you are diagnosed as being clinically depressed. If you are say an HMO patient you should ask for a referral to a Board Certified psychiatrist rather than being treated by your gate keeping family doctor.
Seeing the psychiatrist for medication is not only the better option. The psychiatrist is also a higher level of care better; capable and better trained to provide the right medications. Depending on the level of depression or the type of hormone replacements needed you may need different types of medication or more than one medication. The psychiatrist would pick this up faster than the family doctor would.
I have a serious problem.I am 13 years old and i feel like having sex with my aunt. She is single and beautiful. I feel guilty because of this but i cannot help it. Should i approach her? Please help
First relax you're a normal 13 year old male who's hormones are overriding or trying to override his common sense. This is all normal. If it wasn't your Aunt it could be a neighbor or a young teacher that you have become sexually infatuated with.
The fact is that regardless of who this is you can't act upon this feeling. In this case it would be Incest. In the case of any other adult infatuation you would not only run the very good possibility of embarrassing yourself. But if acted upon; the adult would be at risk of going to jail on charges of statutory rape, child molestation and possibly pedophile charges. These are real legal charges that carry long prison sentences plus having to register as a sex offender when released from jail for the rest of her life.
The preceding are the real life consequences of acting upon the hormonal impulses caused by puberty. You're not weird or strange in any way. Just about every teenage boy will fixate on an older woman at sometime during the early stages of puberty. It is really quite normal. There is no reason to feel guilty or to feel uncomfortable around your Aunt. Remember she does not know she is the object of your sexual desire or fantasy and that is all it should ever be.
What I suggest is you keep this a fantasy to fantasize about while masturbating. Masturbation is the best way to deal with your present and temporary desire. Through masturbation and fantasy you can live out your fantasy in the privacy of your bedroom and have the sexual relief your body is needing.
Masturbation is also normal and nothing to be ashamed of. According to a survey I read over 85% of us masturbate. This would include your parents and your Aunt. Parents masturbate as a part of foreplay prior to intercourse. Oral sex, fingering and hand jobs are part of masturbation.
As you can see masturbation is quite normal as long as it does not become and all encompassing fixation. Just make sure you close and lock your bedroom door so as not to be intruded upon. Even though this is a normal part of life I don't think you want your mom walking in on you in the middle of a good wanking session.
im 15 ,and im really fustrated with my parents ,mainly my mom because i already know my dad wont buy me nothing , even if his job was high paying , but my issue is that im really into fashion and like shoes , because where i live theres alot of people that are nicely dressed , and have alot of "shoegame" , and everytime i go ask my mom for like the latest pair of jordans that comes out , she alway gives the same excuse like your grades , or your room not clean , or you have an attitude ... the little stuff like that , that i easily can improve , but still doesnt buy me anything . i explain myself to her like everyday how its important to be dressed nice or youll get picked on , or something like that , she just doesnt understand , ontop of that she thinks paying the bills is giving stuff to me , okay but what about the other moms they pay the bills and buy thier children thier wants and need , i look at things like it could be worse , but i also look at things like it can be better , so its a win,loose situation . idk , i just want some things..u know , and my mom gets mad if i ask other relatives for stuff , but doesnt want to buy it anyways ,wow ..pathectic , hun ?
Your probably not going to like my answer but here it is anyway.
The answers your getting are the same ones my sister and I would get from our parents when we were young. When my father built rooms for us in the attic of our house we were told we would not be getting carpet because we did not keep our rooms clean. Real answer was he ran out of money so we got tile floors.
As for buying the latest fashion in clothes same answers as you are getting backed up with be happy you have clean cloths that fit you well and are not all torn.
The real excuse was as I found out many decades later was they didn't have the money to buy the designer labels or the in things. So they used ever conceivable excuse not to buy us the cloths we wanted or anything else we didn't actually need.
As hard as this is going to be to believe; I will tell you it hurts us as a parent more than it hurts you when we can't give you something you want. It is also part of parenting to walk that find line between being a good parent and not spoiling our children. For those of us who can afford to give our children the world that is a difficult line to walk. It is almost as hard as the one your parents are walking by maybe not being able to give you what you want and maybe being hard pressed to give you what you need.
You say it yourself; "dad does not have a high paying job." You do not say if mom works outside the home. If she does how much does her earnings contribute?
Times are tough right now. If both mom and dad have jobs they are the lucky ones. Watch the news read the newspapers. The economy is not all that good. Jobs are still hard to find, prices on everything are going up and I mean everything from food to taxes. Gas for the car changes almost daily. Health Insurance, tolls, staples of food and medicine are all rising.
These are the necessities of life. Designer clothes are nice but they are really low on the list of necessities. I know you want to hear that your parents are being mean but I don't think so. I think like my parents were they don't want you to know how bad things are financially as it is really not something a child needs to know. Is this right or wrong I can't say. I raised my child differently. about different things.
You may be to young to go out and find a real job though there are other things like baby sitting and other things teenagers do to earn money. I suggest if you want designer clothes you earn the difference between what mom will spend on clothing and the cost of the designer clothing.
My lil brother has a baby on the way, and is being very responsible about it, but her parents are very controlling of her. They are both legal age, she 19 and him about to be 20. The baby is due at the end of the month, and the soon to be grandmother called to tell him he's not welcome at the hospital when the baby comes, and if the babys mom tried to call him, she'll rip the phone from the wall. The sad thingis they have her so brainwashed that I'm sure she's afraid to call anyway, and her mom is a paralegal, so she's threatened to keep the baby away from us. We live in TEXAS, does anyone know what he should do????
Your brother needs to see a lawyer. The person who has no rights is the grandmother to be. The people with rights are the parents of the child be they married or not.
If the mother is being medically treated under her parents insurance, this does not give her mother any say in her care or the care of the baby. The future mother is of legal age in Texas or any other state. The future father of this child has rights, in Texas or any other state.
In fact he is responsible for this child financially until this child is 18 years old. With this responsibility comes certain rights such as custody and visitation. The grandmother to be being a paralegal means nothing more than a scare tactic to try and convince your brother that she is right and he is wrong.
If your brother cannot afford an attorney on his own have him contact the local legal aid society for help. They will file the legal papers to see to it that his rights are preserved and that his financial responsibilities' to the child are spelled out and approved by the courts.
Grandma can stand on her head, but once the courts are involved if she interferes she is the one who can go to jail.
Even if grandma to be was to claim her daughter was under age at time of conception, which is not possible. There is a law called HIPPA which covers young people from age 14 and older giving them full medical confidentiality over their reproductive rights. As a paralegal future grandma would know this and know she has no say in her daughters pregnancy.
I'm renting an apartment for the first time and my agent said that I would be given a free one month rent, except for electricity. She said that I would be moving in the 26th, but I also know that it'll be next month later in 5 days. I have heard that rent is due at the beginning of every month....I have to pay a small fee for that "free month" so I don't want them to end up telling me that my second month's fee is due already, since it's really only been 5 days. Is it okay for me to talk to her about when the rent is due every month? It would make sense for rent to be due the 26th of the second month that I'm living there since the first month is free. What if she says that isn't? Also, I'm signing a 6 month lease for this apartment. I want to try it out first before I sign the rest of my year away. What are some things I should be aware of? I know to ask for break-ins, flexibility in terms of modification for the apartment, early termination consequences, late rent, and to check for mold, running warm and cold water as well as heater and ac. If I sign a 6 month lease is management allowed to change rent every month or is that just for "rental agreement"?
Ask all the questions you need to ask to assure yourself that you understand the terms of your lease and what the leasing agent is telling you. This is your money and your new home you are discussing. You need to be satisfied and nothing should be left unasked. If you have a question ask it.
Read your lease carefully and make sure you understand the terms of the lease. In most leases the rent is fixed for the term of the lease. There can be a clause allowing the rent to be increased monthly for short term leases so read the lease to make sure what the terms are.
Do not depend on the leasing agent to tell you how safe the neighborhood or the apartment complex is. It is the agents job to rent units, so call or go to the police station and ask them. They will tell you how many break-ins or other calls they answer at that complex.
The other things you mentioned are all good things to look for and be concerned about. One other thing you can discuss and negotiate into your lease is an escalator for the rent increase not to exceed should you sign for another six months or and entire year.
Make sure you get a signed copy of the lease for your records. Keep it in a safe place. A small records box kept in your closet or under the bed is a very good idea to purchase if you do not have one.
Welcome to you first apartment.
what kind of jobs can you get with a degree in biological engineering?
I believe they would be mostly laboratory jobs such as the ones at NIH, Drug Companies the CDC and others. It would be interesting work I'm sure especially those labs doing cutting edge research.
A great deal of Bio-science work is done at University campuses under different types of grants. Hospitals such as Johns Hopkins also does a great deal of research in conjunction with their College and school of Medicine. What I'm not sure of is how high paying these jobs are since most are as I said done under grant funding.
IF you are already in College taking courses towards this degree I would suggest talking with someone in the career counseling office or one of your professors.
If you are not in college yet; write to some of the Drug Companies, the NIH, and the CDC to find out more about this career field. If they have a lab near where you live you might apply for a summer internship with one of them to get a first hand look at this career field.
I'm thinking of suicide. I have an amazing boyfriend but he doesn't know any of this. I really am depressed, and don't know what to do anymore. I'm 16 years old. I live with my mom, she doesn't really care for me, her boyfriend who i hate so much, he's always calling me names like the B' word, and a H** and always trying to yell at me, he used to molest me when i was like 10 years old, but i just thought he was playing a game with me. I've also been really stressed, and doing bad in school, i don't really show it cause i know no one would really care, other than my boyfriend. I was raped when i was 8 years old and i can still remember every detail and all. I just don't feel like i fit in, i have no friends, everyone just left me, i used to cut myself, I'm thinking of doing it again. I just don't wanna live anymore. My real dad died when i was only 3 years old, i have so much pain inside of me, i just wish I'd die now, right now, i can't take anything anymore, I'm scared.
Suicide is not the answer. I'm sorry you have had to put up with everything that has happened to you, it is not right. There is help for you to make it right. Even after all this time you can report this to the proper authorities and there are people who will help you do so.
There are two hot lines I would like you to call. The first is called RAINN. RAINN stands for; Rape, Abuse, Incest, National Network. When you call their number you will be connected to a crisis center near you. The call takers are trained to help you get the help you need. The call is free and totally confidential.
I'm sure you seen in the papers and on the news how people have come forward after decades have gone by to report they were raped and abused as children. This is where your at today. It happened when you were to young to do anything about it. You are now old enough to tell someone what has happened to you and the proper authorities will take the appropriate actions to punish your rapist and abuser.
By calling RAINN and telling them what has happened they will help you tell your story to the proper authorities. Call them at 1-800-656-HOPE.
The other hot line is the National Suicide Hotline. No matter what problems you are dealing with, they want to help you find a reason to keep living. By calling 1-800-273-TALK (8255) you’ll be connected to a skilled, trained counselor at a crisis center in your area, anytime 24/7.
The National Suicide Prevention Hot Line and RAINN are their to help you. Please call them now. If you are actively suicidal, meaning you plan on hurting yourself now then please pick up the phone and dial 911.
By committing suicide you are letting the person who raped and abused you get away with his crimes. Don't let the bastard win. Be stronger than him and live to see him in jail and move on to a successful life while he rots in jail.
18/f
Me and my now ex boyfriend broke up a couple days ago. He hasn't been happy for the past month so as a result, he didn't treat me right.
We were together for about 2 years. I just don't know how to handle it. Every guy I ever dated, I broke up with them. So when he broke up with me and didn't seem to care, I felt really hurt.
I haven't told my dad yet. They were really close and my dad was so supportive of us dating. So I know he'll have a lot of questions that I can't answer. It just meant a lot to me that I had a guy my dad loved.
With my previous break ups I was in school. I could easily move on because I had friends around and things to keep me busy. But I graduated last year and most of my friends moved. The only ones left are the ones that are best friends with my ex.
I'm pretty much being sad at home. I don't have a car and I went to school for a semester last year out of state but I'm currently not in school..and obviously it's summer.
I'm dealing with the break up the wrong way.
I've never learned how to be alone. Throughout my whole high school experience, I always had a guy. I never realized I was one of those girls until I reflected and noticed I spent only two weeks alone between my break ups without talking to a guy at all.
Most people have told me to just go out and have fun. I have one friend who I go to on Sunday nights because that's the day she doesn't work. So that's my friend time.
I spend a lot of time home alone. My dad works and both my mother and my brother are in rehab.
I guess my question is, how do I handle this by myself? What can I do at home to keep me busy?
Thank you so much.
It sounds like you never had to learn how to make friends, that your boyfriends friends became your friends until the break ups. This happens and there is nothing wrong with you. You just need to learn something you never had to do before. I have a suggestion that you may find useful. I've given this suggestion to others who have for many reasons found themselves having to make new friends.
The first thing you need to do is sit down with paper and pen and make a list of everything of interest to you. Try and think of all the things you like to do, use the alphabet if you think it will help.
I had to take my own advise after becoming disabled. Some of the things I like to do is to cook. I like to write stories even though I'm not looking to publish. I like to experiment with recipes. I'm an airplane buff and I like taking pictures especially of airplanes. These are all things I can do within the realm of my handicap.
Once I put these down on paper and could visualize them I was then able to use my computer to research clubs that offered or catered to my interests. Recipe exchanges on the web occupy a lot of my time while my wife is at work. She and I enjoy cooking together. My son is an airport fire fighter and through him I am able to get close to the runway and take photo's I share at a photo club.
What I am suggesting is you so the same and make a list of those things you enjoy doing. Then number then in order of importance. Take the top 5 and see if there are any clubs or outings that fit with you interests.
The key to everything we do is communication. The ability to talk to someone. Having a common interest breaks down the barrier of the awkwardness in striking up a conversation with a stranger, especially when done in a group setting. These conversations lead to having coffee, then to dating and the next thing you know your in a relationship.
Due to being in pretty bad shape financially, I accrued nearly $3,000 in credit card debt (I believe the limit is around $7,000) over a year and half, I simply could not pay bills in full and had a few major purchases that increased debt. I was too tired of having debt I am unable to pay off, so I dipped into another account (which is meant for future, major purchases like building a business or buying a house) and pulled out some money so that I could finally pay off my debt in full. I thought it was a small price to pay to help improve my credit score.
My question is, how long does it typically take for a credit score to improve, following payment of credit card debt in full?
I can't say for sure just how long it takes for the credit reporting companies to react and raise a credit score. I believe there is a lot more to it than the amount of debt you may carry.
I found myself carrying more debt than I wanted to. I also decided that even though I was paying more than the monthly minimums I was being stupid since I had the resources to pay of the debt and could, if I continued to pay myself what I was paying monthly to the credit card companies, repay myself within two years.
Shortly their after, within four months my, son was driving my car when a young lady paying more attention to texting, rear ended him destroying my car. I now had to purchase a new car. In so doing I found my credit score had jumped by over 100 points putting me into the mid 700's.
Having had more than sufficient cash in my bank I never worried about my credit score so I did not worry or do I know if this 100 point jump was the result of paying off my debt or happened over time. I believe that the greater part was paying of my debt and rearranging some savings plans.
I hope my story answers in part your question.
My 12 year old sister. suffers from anorexia is thier. any advice i can use to help. her thank you
Anorexia is a horrible disease. Hopefully your parents are aware of her eating disorder and getting her help. Friends of ours lost their oldest daughter to this disease.
The best thing you can do for your sister is to be supportive. If you parents are not aware of her eating disorder you need to make them aware before it is to late and the disorder does irreversible damage to her.
This disease kills in a horrible manner as the body to starts to feed on itself. When it does different organs within the body start to shut down.
This is not something that can be overcome just by parents yelling at her to eat. If they force her to eat she will not only be anorexic but most likely become bulimic as well. She needs professional help from a Board Certified Psychiatrist and most likely a Psychologist as well.
Your part is to be supportive and to help her have a better self image. People who are anorexic generally feel they are over weight or have body image problems.
Talking with her psychiatrist and psychologist as to just how and what you can do to be supportive is the best way to help her.
England....My half sister. is going our with her. distant couisEngland n is this right? Is it legal? Thnx
Your question makes no sense, please rewrite it.
Pay attention to spelling and grammar. I think I know what your asking but I'm not sure so I will not answer and others will not as well until I am sure of what you are asking.
Take your time there is no time limit in typing your question.
I found out that my moms bf is cheating. on her i don't want to tell her as she proberbly won't believe me cn someone give. me some good advice on what to do thanks
The best thing for you to do in this type of situation is to do nothing. As you said; mom will probably not believe you anyway or depending on your age feel you are jealous of her.
Just be there for her when she does find out and she will. Be supportive when this happens but don't say anything about knowing he was cheating for then the tables are turned and she will be mad that you didn't tell her. This is a damned if you do damned if you don't situation.
Don't say anything to him either for he will just lie and say you didn't see what you saw or what you heard is untrue. He could then go to your mom and make trouble for you as well. You know what they say about a good defense being a good offense. That would be what he would be doing if he said anything to your mom about anything you might say to him.
I know my advise is hard too take and harder to understand. It is the best advise I can give you that keeps you safe and out of the middle of this. Someone is going to get hurt by this situation and it is best that it not be you.
My 2 sisters. Have been bailed for an offence they commited which was aggravated buglary one of them is 17 and the other. only just turned 16. Both of then were put on tag. the. 16 year. old is keeping to her tag but the 17 year old has broken. her bail conditions and she has cut her tag of will she get done for criminal damage to ? Also if she goes down for aggravated burglary. and criminal damage how long. will she get ?need advice in next month as thier court date is on the 1st august. they deserve what they get but i wanna know the details thnx for your help
This is a hard question to answer for three reasons.
1) Each state has different sentencing guidelines for different crimes.
2) One sister can be sentenced as an adult the other as a Juvenile or both as adults. Again the laws in your state are the deciding factor.
3) the word "Aggravated" can have many different meaning especially when it comes to crime and the law. The term "aggravated" when used to describe a crime can mean some type of weapon was used, anything from a gun to a broom stick. In the case of burglary it could be because it was committed while people were at home and they tied them up or harmed them in some manner.
In most cases that means that additional time will be added when the term "aggravated is added to the charge. In my state that is an additional five (5) years added to the time recommended in the sentencing guide line for the base offence.
Now it is also possible given their ages that the judge might consider supervised probation and community service. With the 17 year old not being compliant with her bail restrictions I would not hold out a lot of hope the judge will have much sympathy for her. She will probably go to jail and most likely for the recommended time. The sixteen year old has a better chance at probation if this is a first offence. As she is compliant with her bail restrictions and given her age.
You have most of two months left to talk with the older sister and get her to get her act straight is she wants to avoid going to jail. Judges are not the most lenient people. They want to see a reason to be lenient. Compliance with bail restrictions and attempts at restitution and other things their attorney may suggest is the best way to stay out of Jail.
Hi. I'm 13 and I'm texting my friends and just recently my dad was doing a phone check and found out I was texting a black boy. He started going off on me and he said I wasn't allowed to text him anymore or I would be in trouble what should I do?
I hate to say this but with little more to go on then what you wrote. It sounds like your father may be somewhat of a racist. The fact that you can see past the color of your friends skin is a good thing and I urge you to do your best to stay friends with this boy as it is the right thing to do.
For your father to have something against you being friends with someone of color is wrong and I think you realize it. The unfortunate thing is there is not much you can do to reeducate your father to a point he can change his mind.
Most likely his feeling against people of color are deeply seated. Probably from an age earlier than you are now and probably instilled in him by his parents. If I am correct the only thing you can do is to realize we are in another time and people of color are no different than you or I. For the next five years you will have to walk some what of a tight rope at home as to not upset your dad while trying to maintain your friendships.
Be honest with this boy and tell him about how your dad feels and it is not how you feel. It is unfortunate but he has probably seen this before and if you and he are truly friends he will work with you to maintain your friendship while not endangering your relationship with your dad.
The one thing you did not say is if mom feels this way as well. If she doesn't then maybe she can run interference with dad for you. If not then when your 18 and legally an adult dad will have little say in who you see .
I wish I had better advise but unfortunately I don't. Just continue to see people for who they are and not to judge them by the color of their skin.
If we r doing sex without condom bt he use to take out een he feel tht sprem is coiming out nd dont again let go his penis inside my vagina still thre is chance of prrgnancy or wat???
Short answer is you can get pregnant this way.
What you are referring to is called the pull out method of birth control and is the least reliable. The problem is that the male emits a small amount of fluid during intercourse. This fluid is meant as a lubricant during intercourse and is something the males for the most part does not even feel he has emitted. Most people refer to this as pre-cum. This fluid has enough semen in it to cause a pregnancy.
Condoms worn correctly are 85% effective in preventing pregnancy. Condoms plus the women being on birth control are almost 100% effective. I say almost 100% as nothing is ever 100%. Also having sex with someone who isn't using a condom opens you up to all the STDs and the HIV/AIDS Virus as you are having sex with every partner he has ever had unprotected sex with. Condoms do not protect against all STDS but they protect against many.
Their is no reason to have sex without a condom. If your over 14 you can purchase condoms or other forms of birth control. When I was a teen the girls had a saying, "No rubber no lover."
Just a note: You writing skills are poor, you are not texting, you need to write in proper form with good spelling. Proper writing form as you learn in English class is the best way to communicate with anyone you don't know. Your poor writing is telling me you are very young. You might be or probably are to young to be having sex. Do you really want to be a teenage mom.
Don't let a boy tell you that if you love him you will have sex with him. This is an age old line of young boys. They confuse love with lust.
Once they get what they want they move on to someone else and you feel used.
I am a guy. And want to have sex
Zane is right, this is not the place for your advertisement/question. Even the title to your question is misleading. I'm going to guess you are a very young teen and offer the following extension to Zane's advice.
The Internet is not the place to look for or advertise for sex. Sexual predators and just plain deviants prowl the web looking for people just like you who may be so naive as to trust them.
As a parent let me remind you of what we have been telling our children since almost the dawn of time. "NEVER TRUST ANYONE YOU DON'T KNOW AND HAVE NOT BEEN PROPERLY INTRODUCED TO BY SOMEONE YOU KNOW AND TRUST; PERFERABLY ANOTHER ADULT YOUR PARENTS TRUST."
It would be nice if we could trust everyone we meet but we can't. The evening news is filled with unfortunate story's of children that have been hurt or worse because they trusted people they have met on line.
If you are as young as I think you are it is normal for you to be horny. It is also normal to masturbate to relive this problem until you are older, more mature and responsible enough to have sexual relations.
You may not like my answer. If you listen to me; do as I advise, you will be alive to experience sexual relations when the time is right.
I just so happened to find this thread while Googling "Why can't my husband and I get along?" Its been a year since you posted and you mentioned you needed someone to talk to. Well...I am in the same boat. My husband is military. He isn't able to show sympathy/sensitivity (he really can't...we've been together for 4 years). We argue ALL the time. He's always in a bad mood. He says I ask too many questions, I nag him all the time, etc. I feel like he doesn't care at all about my feelings and he gets mad whenever I start to tell him how I feel.
I hope you are still on this thread. I would really like someone to talk to.
Robin
Robin; You really have not given us much information to go on here. Such as what branch of the military your husband is in. If he has been deployed to a war zone and if so how many times.
This last one is important as I have found in talking to other military wives with your problem. Is that many of their husbands are suffering from PTSD. I'm not a doctor and you really haven't given much to go on though from the little you did give us PTSD is a very good possibility. If your husband has been subject to deployments to any war zone or peace keeping missions PTSD is an all to common problem.
If I am right in my assumption and you agree with me. Then you have the right to contact his Commanding Officer and make him or her aware of this. If the Commanding Officer does their job as they should, they will see to It your husband gets the proper professional help to overcome this.
Most people suffering from PTSD don't see themselves as being ill. They think all is normal and from their point of view it is. The problem is that their prospective is off and that is where the problem begins.
Hang in their and help him get the help he needs. You and he have sacrificed for our country and now it is time for the country to help you.
I thank you for your sacrifices and his service. Should you wish to be more open about your problem you can send me a private message and I will respond.
So, I'm 17/m and my 4 year girlfriend 17/f recently while we were making out and we do play and so she slipped her hand into pants and started playing with my dick and I felt good, but she wants me to go down on her and we are both virgins. So I've never had sex before and I'm a little nervous and on the fence about it but I really want to please my baby girl. So... I guess any tips on how to get her to achieve a really powerful orgy? How does one EAT a girl out? I googled it already but it wasn't too helpful. Any advice on great tricks to make her squirt and orgy really good? Thanks!
Try looking at some of these web sites
http://search.yahoo.com/search;_ylt=Aqm.NbY9i5KDmRGdis7zeq2bvZx4?p=How+to+give+oral+sex&toggle=1&cop=mss&ei=UTF-8&fr=yfp-t-656
Hi im a 14 yr old boy in london and i am desperate fir sex. I masturbate often and have even gone onto websites to try and get it. If not though i would want to be able to use some kind if pocket pussy or but because i have parents i wiuldnt be able to purchase it without them knowing please help
Lets not worry about the age of consent laws and legalities for the moment. Lets talk about what you wrote. "i'm a 14 yr old boy in london and i am desperate fir sex. I masturbate often."
This makes you a normal 14 year old boy who is suffering from the perils of puberty. Puberty has all these new hormones coursing through your body and your body wants sexual relief. This is normal, so is masturbation to relieve this problem.
Sex with a willing young lady at this time might be possible though it is wrong for her as her body is not yet ready for sex. Sure she may look like a women but her sexual parts are still developing and sex now would be very painful for her and maybe impossible if you have an overly large penis.
Then of course there is always the chance of her getting pregnant. Not knowing the laws in England I am not aware of what birth control is available to 14 year olds so abstinence is the best advice to offer for now.
Masturbation for a 14 year old is normal as long as it does not become an all encompassing activity. It is not unusual for a 14 year old male to masturbate 4 times a day. It is safe, it is pleasant and most of all you cant become a father from masturbation at 14 years of age.