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Lost happiness
I am a 24 yr old female. I have lost myself.. I have forgotten how to be happy... I have forgotten how to live my life fully.. And most importantly I have started hating myself.. I dont know why I am living.. Can any one here help me out? Everyone has his/her own share of joys and sorrows and I too have my share. But I dont find any interest in anything.. I dont know what to do.I want to be hale and hearty just I was about 9-10 yrs back.
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See...hating yourself wont help you and its not the solution for anything..I know everyone has negative side of life and negative aspect in self but one should hide your negatives with positives. I guess you should go out and get involved in activities,which you like,e.g., painting,dancing etc.
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Dragonflymagic took the long way around to suggest you may be suffering a bout of depression. Neither of us are doctors and diagnosing is something we cannot do. Dragonflymagic did an excellent job of describing one of the problems that is the bases of depression.
In your short note you hit several of the factors a doctor would look for in testing you for depression. There are ten factors or ten questions they ask. If you answers to the majority of them are signs of depression you would receive a diagnoses of, in most instances, clinical depression which is what Dragonflymagic explained. Clinical depression is the most common type of depression with 2 or 3 out of 5 people suffering from it at one time or another.
Stress is a major cause of clinical depression. Being your age you are just about the right age for clinical depression to be the problem.
You may just be finishing college. You have college loans to worry about and a poor job market to enter. This plus you should be at a point in your life where you should be able to stand on your own two feet yet you face the prospect of moving back in to the family home. It is just the way things are right now; a sign of the times one could say. Stressful, hell yes.
What to do about this. First you need to find out if you are clinically depressed. This takes a visit to the family doctor. He or she will ask you about ten questions. From these questions the doctor will be able to judge if you are suffering from clinical depression and to what degree. The doctor then may offer you medication to help replace the hormones you are not getting enough of, or he or she may suggest talk therapy with a clinical psychologist. Talk therapy will help you find out what is stressing you out. One found the therapist will help you find better ways to deal with that stress.
Your doctor may also suggest you see a psychiatrist for medication. Do not get upset if your doctor makes this suggestion. Your not crazy. Since these hormones are secreted into the brain a Board Certified psychiatrist is better trained to prescribe medication and monitor your medication then your family doctor is. Seeing a psychiatrist is actually better for you if you are diagnosed as being clinically depressed. If you are say an HMO patient you should ask for a referral to a Board Certified psychiatrist rather than being treated by your gate keeping family doctor.
Seeing the psychiatrist for medication is not only the better option. The psychiatrist is also a higher level of care better; capable and better trained to provide the right medications. Depending on the level of depression or the type of hormone replacements needed you may need different types of medication or more than one medication. The psychiatrist would pick this up faster than the family doctor would.
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Sometimes the changes in our life that start robbing us of joy are subtle, nothing sudden that can be easily spotted. I have a feeling that little things slowly built up to affect you. After all you recall being whole and healthy 10 yrs back so it slowly wasted away over that span of years.
When there is no interest in anything, that and hating oneself are signs of depression.
The term depression refers to something being depressed, or another way to say it, running low. Such as fund in the checking account are depressed.
So what is running low in you?
It's called neuro transmitters, hormones that your body creates on its own. They are called serotonin, oxytocin and dopamine. When the levels of these have dropped for too long and are not immediately built back up, a person becomes sad, loses happiness, desire in life and ends up finally in a state of depression. A medical doctor will treat people by prescribing a medicine that is a synthetic of the naturally occuring hormones in your body and you take these daily. I will admit that some people will end up having to get a doctor to treat them. However i don't believe that all need to go that route immediately. I have one daughter who tried what I will share with you, she got her neuro transmitters up NTs all by herself and now knows how to keep them that way. In the year she has done that she was promoted to a lead and now an asst. manager where she works all because of her extremely friendly cheerful happy outlook on life and all the customers love her. The other daughter had post partum depression and never got better trying to handle it on her own and had to get the extra meds from a doctor.
You won't know until you try if you can get your depressed levels of NTs up until you try.
For those NTs to rise, the body needs the right conditions. Its actually very simple. ONe is giving and recieving bear hugs, the ones that last more than a second or two. You know that happy feeling when your spirit briefly feels so light like a balloon like its about to float right out of your chest. Thats the feeling you are looking for, cus when you feel that, your body is working to produce serotonin and the others. It really is hard to get the 8 hugs a day minimum that is prescribed in hugging therapy. I do not make this up. Check it all out online your self including NTs and the 'tonins'. Another thing that raises your sense of well being and helps also with raising your spirits vibrational levels is singing, music, not all music, just those few songs that you know used to make you feel good, could lighten your mood. Start going through them. Its not the words but the melody that does it. For example, one of the songs that does it for me is "Clocks" by Coldplay. Movement for the body helps too such as in running or jogging which i hate but I tried Skipping like we all did as little kids. It made me feel like a kid and felt silly and i couldnt help but giggle when i did it. Dancing is very good too. Once you have your NTs up to normal, it will be easier for you to evaluate and see what might have been stealing your joy to begin with. Life is stressful. After a day out in the world, it is good to come home and recharge. Often we dont do that...and that's where we make a crucial mistake.
Another thing to do, my own suggestion knowing from experience it helps, is to surround yourself with really positive happy people. You can check out Meetup.com on line and find meet up groups in your area. Go for even a coffee meet up, board games, whatever your interests are but also I would suggest looking under self help, healing, meta-physical, new age. This is where you can find meditation groups, people who practice various energy healings. Thees are people aware of what can affect our bodies and none of it is harmful in a spiritual way, no matter what your beliefs if any. Find a couple groups and try them out. You don't have to know how to do energy healing, Reiki or whatever, they love to have someone new to help. You may find you enjoy this and go on to taking some classes so you can also help others. But that's for sure where many positive people can be found all at once. Don't worry about interests. They will either come back or you will develop new ones. Joyful blessings to you.
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