jbdreamer's advice column

Would Express clothing store hire a guy?? I was shopping there and really like their clothes... and I figure if I worked there I would get a really nice discount.

Of course! I see guys working there all the time.

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What would you do if the guy you were madly in love with was like your perfect man that you've always dreamed of and then all of a sudden changed? I mean like James has always been the perfect guy for me since I met him! And now all of a sudden hes different what do I do?!?! If your answer helps me out Ill definatly rate you good!

The problem was that you saw him as the PERFECT person. Well nobody is perfect. I doubt he is actually changing, your just getting to know him better, and learning that he's not everything you built him up to be. Don't put people on a pedestal. You'll only set them up to dissapoint you.

If your not happy with who he really is, then it's time to move on. There is nothing you can do to change him.

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when should a kid have sex

Kids should never have sex.

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Hi! I'm planning on starting to bring my lunch to school for now on instead of buy it (the food my cafe teria serves is disgusting and full of fat and grease). My question is, what are some yummy foods I can bring to lunch instead of a sandwhich or the usual. Also, what are some lunchbox safe snacks? And please dont say "sandwich and chips" because i already know that. Thanx!

Lettuce salads! - so many endless combos - like candied walnuts with rasberry vinagret - if you need more ideas just ask!

Yougurt and granola
Veggies and dip
Cheese and crackers
Pasta salads
Fruit salad
Tuna salad on crackers
Instead of a sandwich - make a wrap with a tortilla

Just keep an icepack in your lunchbox to keep everything crisp and cool

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Was wondering, does anyone happen to know what you can do/use to get rid of stretch marks? LAst summer I lost a lot of weight really fast because of allergies (every time I ate I'd just vomit, waaay too much mucus in my gut for the stomach to deal with plus food) and now I have stretch marks on my sides. They're kind of unsightly, so I just wanted to know what I could possibly do to get rid of them/decrease visibility.

Being a person with sever allergies myself, I have never heard of allerigies causing people to throw up everything they ate. Are you sure you are not Bullemic or have some other medical problem?

For strech marks - coco butter, or a lotion rich in vitamin E will help those marks fade away.

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hi im 15 and my boyfriends 16. although many adults say that us teens dont know what love is teens know when their in love. i just want peoples opinions (teens and adults) on if teens know what love is and also me and my boyfriend are really in love and its NOT lust. we know it. anyways we decided we were going to have sex (no my boyfriends not like that hes never pushed me into sex ever) but were not having sex for the fun of it we really do love eachother. please give us ur thoughts and please dont be mean thanx!~Kelley

Remember - every adult that says that teens don't know what love is - has been a teen themselves. They speak from experiance.

Honestly, ask people 5 or 10 years older than you how much they changed from the time they were a teenager. I guarentee almost all of them will say they have changed dramaticaly. You may think you know a lot, but when I think back to when I was a teen, I can't believe how nieve I was. Your emotions are strong because they are new. Wait a little longer to grow up, because I guarentee you will.

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I have to make some kind of food for this international festival at school, our country is mexico. I have to bring something that will feed a lot of people and all the basics are already taken. Chips and salsa and cheese dip and quesadillas and rice and tacos are already taken. I need something thats big and easy. Any ideas would be very helpful, thanks!
I rate 5!

Does it have to be food? When I was a girl scout we did Mexico for an international festival, and we sold Mexican paper flowers. And we sold Trolls when we did Sweden. Man, that was a LONG time ago. Otherwise I agree with Chicka*-*, everyone loves churros.

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does anyone out there know if the new nightworld book strange fate is out yet.do you know where i can get a copy?

Go to Amazon.com
They have every book you can think of, including ones not yet released. You can pre-order.

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I have been taking birthcontrol for 2 years, I have two children, My question is if you are on birth control and you are taking penicilin can you get pregnant, if so how soon can you take a pregnancy teest to confirm if you are or not. Thank You

The pill and penicillin are both perscription medications. You doctor would not perscricbe you with something that would interact with your other medications without some warning. Therefore, there should be no problem, unless you are taking medication without a doctors perscription.

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Is it true that you can loose calories by chewing gum? I heard it today, and it makes sense because you are chewing and not eating, and I've heard that it can help you loose weight while cooking so you don't eat, so what's the deal?

You loose calories while doing anything, even sleeping. It's just a very insignificant amount. Walking up four flights of stairs is only about 10 calories lost. So don't plan on loosing weight by chewing gum.

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Yesterday I answered a question and I got I really mean and bad feedback for it when I was really trying to help and be nice and explain everything. So I was wondering what I did wrong because it really hurts me and I do care. And also is there a way to change my feedback because it really messes up my rating (I usually get 5s and now I got a 2)?
Here’s the question:
i go to this really preppy biotchy school in dc (all girls, private, kiss kiss) but anyway, i used ta be a really sweet person and like really focused and dedicated in life, but my school has really changed me...i find that i am really judgemental of people in a bad way...and i spend way too much time deciding what to wear and i do alot of trashy stuff with guys...what should i do?
Here’s the answer:
Dear,
It’s nice that you realize you have changed. Now one of the reasons why you changed might be that you seek the approval of the people around you and you feel the need to fit in. Or it might be that your friends influence you and as Oscar Wild said “There’s no such thing as good influence”. We are usually influenced by significant others which means that we are influenced by people like our parents, friends, movie stars and so on, people we respect (it’s a sociological fact, I am not just making it up).
So now if you want to be more like your old self, you should start being yourself and believe me I know how hard it can be sometimes. Do not be afraid to stand up for what you believe in and speak your mind. If your friends are doing something you think is wrong then tell them and most of all do not do it just because they are doing it. Be who you want to be not who your classmates think you should be. It’s nice that you want to be a better person now you just have to get the courage to change.
Also about the judgmental part, try putting yourself in other people’s place before you judge them and try to find out the reasons behind their actions.
Changing takes time but that’s until it becomes a habit. So one day just say to yourself that you are going to be nice to people from that point on, so next time you want to make a remark that would hurt someone think how you would feel if you were in their shoes. Start being sympathetic, start making compliments and be encouraging even if you don’t feel like it and at first it will feel unnatural but after time it will become a part of you. There’s not a secret to changing, you’ve got to make an effort at first.
Good Luck!
This is the feedback (I got 2 for it):
Thank you for that condescending lecture. And thank you for reitterating my point: I do want to go back to being myself. Unfortunately, you have not supplied the requested HOW of the matter. Better luck next time, deeeaarrrr.

Please help! I rate high!
assia

Don't let it get to you, not everyone is going to agree with your advice. And sometimes people are just not ready to hear the truth. Don't worry about your ratings, a few bad ones show you are not afraid to speak your mind.

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A senior girl in my first period's mom passed away on Friday. She wont be coming to school for the rest of the week because of the tragic situation. My teacher was to get a "sympathy card" and get my whole class to sign it saying how sorry they are and all that. I, along with a few other people in the class, don't think it'll be a good idea. WE said so in class today and our teacher just responded with, "Lauren need to know we care about her."

We don't think it's a good idea because she would be just coming back from a whole week at home with her family grieving and she doesn't need all this pity from us. When our teacher told us what happened, all you could hear around the class room was "Oh that sucks, I can't believe she's finishing her senior year without her mom, Prom is going to suck for her, etc." I know those kind of things are going to end up in the card.

At the end of class, we just decide that we weren't going to sign the card but do y'all think there's a way to stop the whole thing?

I think she would be more hurt if she recived no sympathy from her peers. It's common curtisy to send your regrets when someone dies. It seems kind of heartless not to show any support. Sign the card, and tell her you care. That is not pity! Even better, take a collection and send the family flowers.

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I was wondering if there's anyway to get rid of a real tan? I went to the lake this past weekend and got wayyyy too tan becasue we were out all of the 3 days. It makes me look so fake and gross.

When you tan, you are actually baking your skin. Using a lot of aloe and mositerizers will help sooth your skin and make the tan fade away quicker. But there is not way to just make a tan dissaperar.

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OK heres the dealio
i HATE showers...they just seem like a waste of time for me. Does anyone know any ways that will make showering fun?? no sarcastic answers please. Thanks

Wow, you hate showers? It's one of my favorite parts of the day, lol. Don't think of taking a shower as a chore, but instead as a way to relax. Get a nice lofa and some good body wash; it feels good to be all lathered up in a good soap. Try lighting up the bathroom with just candles, that's very soothing. Try singing, that's always fun; or get a shower radio. You could also try bath tub color crayons for kids and draw pictures on the wall. If you just hate getting up early in the moring to take one, then take showers at night.

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I'm currently friends with a 24 year old (man)that smells very bad.I'm not sure how to tell him that he stinks. Him and his mother both smell actually but he is unbearable. He is kinda of an outcast in our town because everyone has smelt him at one time or another which he does not have many friends. He is a really good guy but he constantly smells of cigarette smoke, body Odor, he also is always covered in dog hair. They never open the windows or curtains in the house so it makes the stench just linger. Im also not sure if he washes his clothes or his body on a regular basis. He is very tempermental and i think he will get mad and take it the worng way when i let him know he smells. So my question is how do I tell him he smells without hurting him to bad.

fed up friend

Well it's obvious that he didn't learn grooming skills from his mother. If you are a good friend, it is best to just be honest. Wouldn't you want to be clued in if you smelled? Think about how you would want someone to tell you, and take that route.
I'd say: "Because I am your friend I want to be honest with you. Do you realise that you kind of smell. I am not trying to be mean, I just thought you should be aware."

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My boyfriend of 3 days asked me out over the phone at midnight. He always calls me at ridiculous times, even before we were going out, and always tells me to call him at a specific time the next day. Except, the day after he asked me, when I called him, he didn't answer his phone.
He called me at about 8pm, apologising and saying that he was ill - but that I could come to his house tomorrow if I wanted and I should call him at 11. I called and he didn't pick up.
That was yesterday, and still he hasnt spoken to me.
What should I do?
I rate

You have been dating for 3 days! Relax. He's sick, give him a break. Give him a few days before getting mad at him for not calling. You don't want to seem like a needy girlfriend.

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I'm on my peroid, and it's suddenly (within the last two days) become very, very painful to pee.

It's fine until I have to stop peeing, at which it feels like everything is pinched down there. I thought it might just be something because I'm using regular flow tampons right now, instead of just light, however when I try to pee even without a tampon it's still painful.

I know I don't have an STD--I'm a total virgin, and I don't have any other symptoms of any other common infections, such as a yeast or bacterial infection.

Does anyone know why I could suddenly be having so much pain? I'd appericate it.

You don't need to have all the symptoms for it to be a yeast or bacterial infection. It could also be a bladder infection. Or you may be allergic to something like a new soap, or brand of tampons. Whatever the cause, you deffienatly need to see your doctor so it can be properly treated.

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Theres a girl who is a complete and total slut shes trying to take my boyfriend away from me I dont like her and she knows it i have talked to my boyfriend and he promised he wouldn't go for her...what should I do?

Ignore her, and trust your boyfriend. If he is not worth trusting, then he is not worth keeping anyway.

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i wash my face twice a day (once in the morning, once at night) but after i was my face it gets really shiny. and its really noticable (a few people have asked me why my face is so shiny...which is really embarrasing.)....is there any product that wont clog my pores but will make my face less shiny?

thanks.

Use a matte fondation and some powder. Clinique offers oil free products.

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Can you answer a question more than once?

No, but you can edit answers you have already given. So in a way, yes. Go to Edit Answers.

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