Should. You tell your bf that ur a virgin?? How do you knw when ur cherry is poped
Yes. Why wouldn't you? Not only is it a silly thing to lie about, your boyfriend will probably go alot slower and gentler as he will know you're likely to be nervous.
Usually you will bleed a bit. Sometimes you don't though. If you use tampons it's likely to have happened already. Unless you have an internal examination there's no way of telling for sure but it's not really a big deal. If you have sex you will have lost your virginity, regardless of whether or not your hymen is broken.
[view]
I'm 19. He's 18. When we first started going out (over a year ago) and started rounding the bases, he'd try to initiate sex. Like we'd be naked and making out on his bed, and he'd just give me this look, and we both knew what it meant - but I always shot him down because I wasn't ready at the time.
Then, last summer, I didn't turn him down. It didn't happen, however; he lost his erection about two seconds after he put the condom on.
He hasn't tried since. Once I took the initiative and asked if he wanted to do it, but still nothing happened 'cause he didn't have a condom (sigh.). And then he said something along the lines of "I don't have one 'cause I thought you wanted to wait 'til college". I made it clear to him that I was ready.
Well, we're in college now. And still, nothing's happened. I just want to know why he's stopped trying. Is he worried about a repeat performance of last summer? Is HE not ready? (We're both virgins) Is it me?
I want to ask him all this, but I don't know HOW. One time, I decided I'd just bluntly ask him, but the time came and I couldn't get the words out. I don't even know why. Yeah, talking about sex makes me uncomfortable. And I'm basically a girl asking for sex, that makes it worse. Not in my eyes, but in society's eyes, in which it's okay for guys to want sex, but if a girl does, it's whorish.
Anyway, sorry for ranting. So how does a shy, awkward human like me even START on this topic?
You need to be blunt with him. Talking openly and honestly is really important in a relationship, especially about issues like sex.
He's your boyfriend. You should be able to talk about things like this with him. You don't have to sound like you're 'asking for sex'. You just need to tell him what your feelings are on the issue and find out his. Take a deep breath and just say 'I want to talk about sex'. If it makes it easier, you could choose an intimate time (i.e. cuddling after a heavy make out session) as the subject is likely to be fresh on both of your minds. Of course it will be a little embarassing and awkward to begin with but you'll both appreciate the frank conversation. It's really important you both know where you stand on issues like this.
It could well be that he's worried about repeating what happened last time or it could be that he's changed his mind about being ready. Until you speak to him, it's all speculation. I'm sure he's feeling just as awkward as you are and he'll probably appreciate you initiating the conversation.
Remember though, if he isn't ready for it then don't pressure him or make him feel bad. Everyone matures at different paces and it's okay if he doesn't want to have sex with you at the moment.
[view]
i'm 22 f and my bf is 24 we've been together for 4 months but were friends for 2 years before. resently conversations about the future have been coming up. he says that he would love to marry me and be with me always but wants to be together for longer before he makes that comitment. however when the subject of kids came up he was more excited. i want to have kids with him but i feel that this is more important to him then marriage. which doesn't fly in my books. i'm a little old fashioned that way. is this just me being crazy or should i really worry about it.
This is roughly how my Dad proposed to my Mum, about two months after they met: 'Do you wanna have a baby with me? We'd better get married then.' Not the most romantic but 20 years down the line, they're still together. There's two morals here. The first is that my parents certainly hadn't been together very long and nearly everyone thought they were rushing into things. However, moving fast isn't always a bad thing. I have friends who are 19 and already thinking about marriage with their girlfriends and boyfriends. For them, they know this is it.
The other moral to my parents story is that being more excited about kids than marriage is fine. Like someone below mentioned, although marriage is a traditional institution that symbolises a committed relationship, it does not make or break it. Of course my parents were in love when they decided to get married but they were much more excited about having a baby together. Kids are a much, much bigger commitment than a marriage, which sadly do not necessarily last forever. Kids really are for life.
Different people have different priorities. It's okay for your husband to be more excited about having children. Marriage has an important place but beyond a wedding day it doesn't quite bring the joy and excitement that having your own children do. However, it's also perfectly okay for you to have a moral standpoint on marriage.
It's really important that you are open and honest with your boyfriend. Let him know that you are excited about having kids but that you feel that marriage should come first.
[view]
My skin used to be beautiful, it was flawless and I had a nice glowing olive skin. I was also really skinny, my nanny used to call me a stick because of it. After my 12th birthday I started my period and therefore had breakouts. I wasn't bothered at first because they weren't really bad and mum said it was normal. Then, for about a year, I noticed scars and marks from the spots I had. I dont pick on them but still they scar, so now I have scars on my face, back and chest. I also gained weight, thought it was normal, until I noticed that my bum and thighs are getting bigger, and not only that, I had stretchmarks! It's not that im really fat or anything, Im 5"1 and 8stone and i have stretchmarks. And then, last year i had chickenpox and every single blister turned to scars, now i have scars all over my body! Im really self conscious now and dont wear shorts and skirts without tights, I dont wear bikinis anymore too, and were goin on a summer holiday in asia, its stupid wearing jeans on the beach where its really hot. I think I may have really bad skin collagen structure or something that makes my skin scar more easily. Im so worried its gonna stay forever. Its affecting my self confidence.
I have had similar problems. I have alot of chicken pox scars on my forehead and bad stretchmarks. As for never wearing skirts and shorts without tights, I feel your pain on that too.
Stretchmarks aren't all about weight gain. When you hit puberty, your body changes very quickly and your skin literally has to stretch to accomodate these changes. Unfortunately, for a girl, this means bigger hips, bigger thighs and a bigger bum. This is to prepare the body for carrying and giving birth to a child. As a result, it's really, really common for girls to get stretchmarks in these areas. It's also normal to get them on your boobs for the same reason. Like me, most of my friends have them in at least one area so don't feel you're alone in this.
There are a couple of things you can do. The first and probably the cheapest is to get some Bio-Oil. You can find it in most pharmacies and the beauty aisles of supermarkets and it's not horribly expensive. Using that every day will help fade the appearance of your acne scars and stretchmarks. Stretchmarks do fade over time to a silvery grey colour a using Bio-Oil will speed up this process considerably. However, stretchmarks never go away completely. If your chicken pox scars are like mine - the kind which are kind of like craters - then it will be hard to get rid of them without cosmetic treatment. However, you may feel less self conscious about them if your other marks are less noticeable.
The second thing I would advise is to visit a professional dermatologist. He/she will not only be able to prescribe you something for your break outs but may also be able to offer further advice on your scars.
In general, drinking lots of water will ensure your skin looks heathly and glowing. You could also take a vitamin formulated for healthy skin. Using non-oily skin products which are designed for problem skin will significantly improve your acne, as will fully removing your make up before you go to bed.
Another little tip I'll give you is that your scars and stretchmarks will probably look less noticeable on tanned skin. I am very pale but if I know I'm going to be in a situation where I have to show my body, a little fake tan really does improve the appearance of my stretchmarks. In the short term this may be a solution for you, especially for your holiday to Asia.
Regardless of these things, it's vital you get you self confidence back up. The suggestions above may help eventually but they are not quick fixes, you need something to make you feel better in the mean time. Everyone has things they don't like about their body and it's not very nice when it affects your daily life. One thing you've got to remember is that often, the things we dislike about our bodies aren't even that noticeable to other people. Focussing on and drawing attention to your good qualities will make you feel so much better and people will notice these instead of your scars and marks.
[view]
If he didn't pop my cherry ? My period hasn't come in like a 1 week and 5 days exatcly.. and it should've already .. he has put it in alot of times with out condom, but he tells me he don't cum ? whats going on ? :(
If you let a penis enter your vagina without any form of contraception then you can get pregnant. Take a test and next time, don't be so naive.
[view]
so call me stupid, but I met up with this guy I met online a few days ago who I actually have mutual friends with and who lives a town over. He was sweet and bought me coffee and we walked around and talked for a while, getting to know each other. Until I stupidly obliged to go to his house with him (even though his parents were home -he's 20 almost 21 by the way, I'm 19). we just hung out for a while until he put it in a movie and that's where things took a turn...I had actually never even been kissed before (yeah, at 19) and obviously also never done anything else. well, we kissed, and did more.. we didn't have sex, which I'm glad we didn't, but I know he wouldve gladly wanted to. he's not a virgin and really experienced.
he keeps texting me now asking to hang out again, but my gut is telling me I shouldn't. He was nice and sweet, and had a cool personality but I wasn't really that attracted to him and the fact that the majority of our little date was sexual gives me a bad idea of what would happen at the next date.. this leaves me confused though because he was my first kiss and whatnot and if I don't see him again then I'm just another girl and he's just a random hookup.
there were times where things were cute- we were just cuddling on the couch and he'd be like "I like this" leading me to believe a relationship could form out of it.. but I don't know if I even want a relationship. let alone with him.
I'm confused. I feel like this was a bad idea to even meet up with him in the first place. I don't regret the fact that he was my first kiss, but I just don't know what to do or say to him now cause I don't think I want to see him again. help?
Go with your gut. In my experience, being unsure about a guy usually means you're not into him.
Send him a polite but firm text saying you'd just like to be friends and that you don't want to lead him on.
Don't feel bad, one of the pitfalls of dating is that sometimes you have to reject people. Just be nice about it and move on.
[view]
i didnt really have sex.
it was in and out kind of thing, i gave and recieved oral (im a girl) abd in the monring i had a lot of discharge very thick and white.
do i take a morning after pill?
im really scared but i know we didnt have sex!
i also gave two other boys oral the sam night does that mean anything
i no for a fact none of these boys have STDs btw.
It's unlikely that you are pregnant but in future, be more careful.
'In and out thing' = sex. Anytime you allow a penis to enter your vagina, you run the risk of pregnancy. Yes, the risk decreases if the act was brief but it is still there. Never have sex without some form of contraception unless you want to get pregnant.
You DO NOT 'know for a fact' that none of those boys have STIs. Some STIs are symptomless, which means they can go undetected for a long time. Unless you have evidence of a clean STI test, then you have no way of knowing for sure and neither do the guys. Some STIs can be transmitted through oral sex so yes, the fact that you gave two other boys oral sex on the same night does mean something as there is a possibility that you passed infections between them.
ANYTIME you have sex with a new partner you should use a condom. You should also be getting regular STI tests if you are sexually active.
The hard and fast (no pun intended) rule here is to always use protection. At the VERY LEAST this means a condom.
[view]
i was never really a slut. i was expierenced but never slutty- then i went from 0-65 in so short and started being rally slutty and now everyone hates me. i dont know what to do. im so upset at myself and i dont know why i do these things even.
how do i stop?
how do i change? and make people stop talking.
How are you defining 'slutty'? Are we talking sleeping around or just kissing alot of guys? And how do YOU feel about it? If you're happy 'being slutty' then perhaps you should accept that people are going to talk and be done with it. Do make sure you're using appropriate protection though.
If you want people to stop talking about you then I'm afraid you're going to have to stop being slutty.
If you stop, eventually people will find something else to talk about. The trouble is that a bad reputation is very, very easy to gain but incredibly difficult to lose. It will take time for people to see you differently but eventually they'll get over it.
If you're unhappy with your behaviour then you need to address why you do it. Promiscuity is a classic manifestation of low self esteem. Does getting with alot of people make you feel good about yourself? Give you a confidence boost? Make you feel loved/wanted/attractive? If this is the case then I can tell you, first hand, that sex does not equal love. Sleeping with multiple guys will not make you happy. You may wish to consider councilling to address the issues behind your behaviour.
The bottom line is this: If you behave like a slut, people will treat you like one. Whether you enjoy it or not, you will lose respect from your peers. If you want people to stop 'hating' you then you need to stop being slutty.
[view]
I just need this clarified for myself, I have not actually been in this situation.
I was thinking the other day, if you are taking the pill consistently, don't miss any and take them around the same time each day, when you are on your period and have unprotected sex, are the pills still effective? I know it isn't 100% safe anyway, but would they still prevent pregnancy, even if you're on your period?
Any information would be very much appreciated.
Yes, you would still be covered.
The Pill covers you for your entire cycle, even on the 7 'off' days.
[view]
My daughter will be 21 in February and is planning a trip to Las Vegas with her best friend and a few other people in March. I have several problems with this mainly because of the area and what goes on in Vegas. Along with that is a little bit of mistrust with my daughter from previous mistakes. I gave the option of her being able to go it her father and I went but stayed in a separate room from her and her friends. Not to mention her friend's mother is paying for the room. She does not think this is fair and I am looking to hear opinions on wether I should allow her to go parent-free or not. Is my option fair?
Legally, your daughter is an adult. She is well within her rights to go without your permission. At some point in her life you will have to let her go and do her own thing, regardless of whether or not you agree with her decisions. All you can do is let her know where you stand on the issue and be there to pick up the pieces if it goes wrong.
[view]
I have been on the pill for about 2 months, i forgot to take it one day, took it the next, with the pill corresponding that day too.. Had sexual relantionship with my boyfriend, and i have been having this brown liquid for 10 days or something like that, my period was suppose to come 10 days ago too, and i am getting really nervous about the whole situation as i have read this could mean i am pregnant, I am going to be 18 in 3 months, and I'm basically terrified this could be it.. PLEASE HELP ME OUT, if this has happened to anyone.. or you know anything about it. I am from Spain.
The 'brown liquid' is your period.
When you first go on the Pill, it messes with your hormones and your cycle. It's normal for your period to change colour slightly or last longer to begin with. You took your Pill the next day after you missed it so you're probably covered, especially as you're having your period now. Take a test just to make sure but I wouldn't worry too much.
Next time you forget your Pill for longer than 12 hours, use a condom for 7 days to be on the safe side.
[view]
Ok so well I guess I just get over angry but anyways a new girl came to my school a couple of days ago and everyone says she is gorgeous and is gonna go out with all the popular guys! well yeah turns out she is going out with my ex and it makes me sooo mad I can't stand it she is so preppy! I just need advice(: haha if anyone can help me - Thanks 13/f
I've got news for you.
There is always going to be someone prettier and more popular than you. Why bother being jealous?
So she's going out with your ex, who cares? He's your ex. You have no claim over him and this girl isn't even your friend, she's done nothing wrong.
Hating someone because they are attractive is immature and fruitless. It reflects badly on you, not her. Focus on yourself and stop worrying about what she's getting up to.
[view]
I'm 28 to 29. Should i be upset with my girlfriend for buying me one gift instead of a few gifts?
Are you serious? It's about the sentiment and thought behind the gift, not the quantity or amount spent on it.
[view]
Okay i need help okay theres this girl named amber and shes my best frend and i think she likes my boy friend because she has fourth period with him and shes allway talking to him she says they talk about me and how he loves me and i know my boy friend he would never go out with my best friend but since we have only been going out for about 6 weeks im scared and i dont know what to to do and i allways ask her if she likes him and she says no way hes so ughy but it seams like it so give me so tips thanks,
Abby
You really need to trust both of them more. Stop being so insecure. Your best friend has given you nothing to make you think that she likes your boyfriend apart from being in the same class as him. Wouldn't it be weird if she didn't talk to him?
Whether you've been going out for six weeks or six years, trust is paramount. If you carry on being paranoid you'll drive both of them away.
[view]
i have some shell i collected and dont know what to do with them.i want to make something or do something with them.what should i do with them/
Drill holes in them and thread them onto string or elastic. You could either make jewellery out of them or just string them up as decorations. The idea below is cool too.
[view]
Okay so I met this guy we were kicking it hung out a few times, I slept over everytime.. I slept with him too early yes(like the second sleepover)but we were both adamant that this was out of character. so we continue to talk/txt he told me he had no plans for new years that he'd hang with me. so i had an offer to go to Vegas but didnt want this cutie to be alone so I didnt go. New Years eve rolls around and he has plans. SMH okay, its not like hes my man but i thought there was a mild understanding. So that was that we tell eachother be safe and have fun...he didnt call or write all weekend (NYE Was a friday) then I write him on sunday like hope you had a good new years...to no avail. He texts me monday night like how are you yada yada...Do i write back? If so when? I want him to chase me but not feel like i dont like him...
You're overreacting.
You should have gone to Vegas with your friends. If you didn't have any specific plans with him, you shouldn't have assumed you'd be doing something together. It's much more attractive when a girl does her own thing and makes plans without sitting around for a guy to call her.
So he didn't text you for a couple of days? Big deal. He was busy with his friends, you should have been busy with yours. He has texted you now and clearly has no idea he's upset you. Sure, text him back. Don't play stupid games and wait a certain amount of time because it never works. If he's into you, he's into you. If you want him to chase you then stop making yourself constantly available in case he wants to do something.
[view]
My boyfriend has started asking me if I want to be fingered. I don't know what to do. I told him I don't know. But he keeps asking me this for a while now. I'm just afraid that he might while we're at school. Advice needed A.S.A.P!!!
If you're not comfortable with the idea then tell him. You don't need to feel bad about it. If you want him to do it then make sure he knows you want it to happen in a comfortable place when you're alone, not at school.
If he gets angry or annoyed then get rid of him.
[view]
You know that clear strap on in the inside of dresses and some tops? That look like a clear bra strap but it's really just to be hooked on the clothes hanger?
Well I suddenly noticed that I don't remove them from any of my clothes! So I was wondering if I should cut them off or can i just rip them off?
You can just pull them off some clothes but it's best to cut them to be on the safe side. You don't want to pull it and end up tearing a hole in the fabric.
[view]
Me and this guy I know have know each other for a couple of years, and we started dating a couple of months ago (about 8), but two weeks ago I lost my virginity to him. I didn't regret it and it was one of the best moments of my life, and he didn't push me or anything. The thing is (yes I know I'm going to get bashed a lot now) is he's 19 and I'm 15. I know you are going to say it was wrong but it felt right to us. The real problem is I told my best friend about me losing my virginity to him and she totally flipped. When me and him started dating, she was really wary and told me it wasn't a good Idea and he was only using me, but now 8 months on we're still together and he never pressured me once. He,obviously being a boy was ready, but we only had sex after I told him I was ready. Anyway after I told my friend about losing my virginity, she basically shouted at me for about 20mins straight calling me a b**** and some other charming words, and then said that if I ever get pregnant or if my boyfriend dumps me, she wants nothing to do with it, and she will only say I told you so.
I don't know what to do now I feel like a worthless piece of crap after what she said, and know that if anything was to happen, my own best friend wouldn't help me?
What should I do? I don't want to lose wither of them.
Your friend either cares about you a great deal and is upset that you've put yourself in what she views as a difficult situation, or she's just jealous and being unkind. Regardless, she has overreacted and making you feel bad was completely unnecessary.
The thing is, although a four year age gap isn't a big deal when you're an adult, at your age it is. You're underage and although I understand that you felt emotionally and physically ready for sex, it's still against the law and your boyfriend was wrong. It's understandable that your friend is concerned about you and doesn't think it's a good idea.
At the same time, it was also wrong of your friend to be rude and unkind to you about this. It's one thing voicing her opinion, but swearing at you and telling you she won't be there for you if it goes wrong is another.
You need to talk to your friend and find out why she's being like this. If you are hell bent on staying with your boyfriend, you might have to accept that your friend wants to stay out of it and doesn't want to hear about it. If your friend refuses to accept it, then unfortunately it's a choice you'll have to make.
[view]
i am stuck of making food for dinner. i want to have something new and unique. i need some ideas. what should i make? please give me as many sugestions as you know. please!
I'm a student living away from home so I'm always looking for new ideas for things to make which are simple, healthy and not too expensive.
One of my favourite things to make is a basic tomato sauce because you can do so many things with it. Fry garlic and onions in olive oil, add tinned tomatoes, tomato puree, a glug of balsamic vinegar, dried oregano, salt and pepper then leave it to simmer and reduce for a while.
You can use it for loads of things. It's good just on its own with pasta or you could stir in some mozzarella or chilli flakes to make it more interesting. You can also play around with the herbs and spices you use - try adding chopped cooked chorizo and smoked paprika instead of oregano or leave out it out and just stir in some fresh basil at the end.
You can also use it as the basis of other dishes. Pour some sauce into an oven proof dish and add sausages then bake for around 30 minutes. Serve it with a nice green salad and fresh bread. This also works with fish - lay some fish fillets (cod and skate work really well) in a dish on top of your sauce and sprinkle with black olives then cook for 15-20 minutes.
Another great thing to use is Cajun seasoning. You can get little ready-mixed sachets or tubs of this at supermarkets and they're usually cheap. Just sprinkle some on some chicken or turkey and fry until it starts to blacken and the meat is cooked through, then pour in some lemon juice and grated lemon zest and let it bubble up before serving. This is great with rice but it also goes really nicely with some potatoes and vegetables.
For a really simple and healthy dinner, fry some onion and just add some chopped tomatoes and prawns. Add salt and pepper and let it simmer while you cook some plain rice. Pour the prawn mixture over the rice and crumble over feta cheese and some chopped parsley or coriander.
Stir frys are brilliant because you can use so many different things and they're really quick. Fry chopped chicken/pork/beef/prawns and add you choice of chopped veg - carrots, mange tout, bean sprouts, mushrooms, cabbage, bok choi, peppers, spring onions, broccoli etc. You can also skip the meat if you'd prefer. You can add soy sauce, garlic or chilli for flavour or buy a ready-made sauce if you want something more interesting. Serve with plain rice or noodles.
Chicken stuffed with cream cheese/mozzarella and pesto then wrapped in Parma ham/bacon is great and really filling. Just bake in the oven for 20-30 minutes. Serve with veg and potatoes.
Another good one which can be really fun to make is homemade pizza. You can buy ready-made pizza bases and sauce - or you can just use the basic tomato sauce - and then you can use whatever toppings you like.
Playing around with the spices and flavourings you use in your cooking can make a big difference. Experiment a little bit and use different herbs and seasonings to find new flavours. Adding garlic, lemon or lime juice, chilli or different spices to a dish can completely transform it and make it something unique and interesting.
[view]
|
