|
I don't know if I should see him again..
so call me stupid, but I met up with this guy I met online a few days ago who I actually have mutual friends with and who lives a town over. He was sweet and bought me coffee and we walked around and talked for a while, getting to know each other. Until I stupidly obliged to go to his house with him (even though his parents were home -he's 20 almost 21 by the way, I'm 19). we just hung out for a while until he put it in a movie and that's where things took a turn...I had actually never even been kissed before (yeah, at 19) and obviously also never done anything else. well, we kissed, and did more.. we didn't have sex, which I'm glad we didn't, but I know he wouldve gladly wanted to. he's not a virgin and really experienced.
he keeps texting me now asking to hang out again, but my gut is telling me I shouldn't. He was nice and sweet, and had a cool personality but I wasn't really that attracted to him and the fact that the majority of our little date was sexual gives me a bad idea of what would happen at the next date.. this leaves me confused though because he was my first kiss and whatnot and if I don't see him again then I'm just another girl and he's just a random hookup.
there were times where things were cute- we were just cuddling on the couch and he'd be like "I like this" leading me to believe a relationship could form out of it.. but I don't know if I even want a relationship. let alone with him.
I'm confused. I feel like this was a bad idea to even meet up with him in the first place. I don't regret the fact that he was my first kiss, but I just don't know what to do or say to him now cause I don't think I want to see him again. help?
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Be honest, tell him he's a nice guy, but you are only interested in being friends with him. You owe him NOTHING. He gave you coffee and you got kissed. End it there if that's what your gut says.
]
Follow your instincts. Back off this one. Believe me, when its the right person, you won't even question wanting to be with them. The mere fact that you are conflicted about this says he's not the right one for now. Next time he asks you to hang out tell him you think he's cool but you realize you're not ready to be with anyone in that way right now. Apologize for sending the wrong message and politely say goodbye. You shouldn't feel too bad about all of this, but take it as a lesson learned. Until you're confident enough about yourself and own sexual desires, stay away from the one on one cuddle time with guys. That way you won't get yourself into a situation in which you are afraid to say no, or don't know how. This is just how it goes when you're dating. Sometimes you can't get around hurting feelings. So just be as nice as you can and let him take it however he wants
]
Go with your gut. In my experience, being unsure about a guy usually means you're not into him.
Send him a polite but firm text saying you'd just like to be friends and that you don't want to lead him on.
Don't feel bad, one of the pitfalls of dating is that sometimes you have to reject people. Just be nice about it and move on.
]
More Questions: |