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to slutty
do you think getting fingered or giving a handjob is to slutty for a 13 yr old? thanks♥
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Hi. Girls of 13 have been fooling around with lads and giving them handjobs behind the bike-sheds for a LONG, LONG time. They weren't sluts, they didn't have their childhood stolen or their lives ruined.They grew up into normal adults like your parents believe it or not! I think it's a 'too much information' and media thing nowadays. Relax sweetheart...you're OK!
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My friend got fingered when I found out I was surprised but it does NOT make you a slut good on you for trying new things
By JFK
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No , I don't think it's slutty .. I'm 13 , I got fingered just last night by a 16 year old and gave him a handjob ..
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I think you know if it's slutty or not and you really need to reach inside of yourself to discover this.
Obviously, it feels very wrong to be doing this or you wouldn't have been concerned about being perceived as a slut. From here, you should take the time to decide if you want to do the right thing and discontinue these activities or if you want to disregard your gut feelings and pretend it is acceptable behavior.
It is a fact that when people feel slutty/dirty/whorish they reach out to people they feel will accept their actions and tell them that they are not doing anything wrong. The fact that you are questioning this tells a lot and I hope you do understand that. I also want to note that just because someone here claims it is not slutty behavior does not make it alright--YOU know what is really going on. To put it simply, your conscience is screaming at you.
You obviously have been jumping into some things you are not well-prepared for and your conscience knows it. I suggest you take time to look at yourself and where you are now headed in life. It is not healthy or intelligent to rush into sex knowing that your sex-partner is attached to another person. It is not right to help someone betray their partner, of course.
What I'm saying is, the next time some guys says he really likes you or loves you it doesn't mean that sex needs to follow. It doesn't matter if he gives you attention or not because this is the WRONG type of attention you need to be able to blossom into a wonderful human.
Prostitutes have sex every single day with various men/women and never feel any emotion for them so that alone tells you that sex doesn't mean anything.
When you interact sexually with a person without getting to know them at all then it does put a stigma on you. The person will perceive you as sexual and empty. They see that you will make them feel good physically but have nothing else to really offer them. Most, if not all, of these sort of relationships burn out quickly.
So, yes, it is slutty behavior. Yes, you should discontinue sleeping around because it is totally wrong. Yes, you should start listening to your conscience and following what you KNOW is right and not what the media and your peers try to feed you. Yes, if you are questioning your actions then they are, most likely, very wrong and you should discontinue them.
In addition, people do care if you're a slut. I care. I don't want you to become a statistic. I don't want to see you here feeling worse about yourself, falling deeper in the hole. I want to see you grow as a person and KNOW that you are better than these activities.
You'll feel better about yourself when you know you have changed. Work on yourself and don't fall into this dark hole of having sex whenever a guy seems interested and pays attention to you. You are worth something right now, don't make yourself worthless to others. Resolve this with yourself, make sure it never happens again, and learn your lesson from these experiences. With all of those met, you will be able to overcome this and will only carry it as a burden to tell others about your experiences--to help enlighten them on what you had to learn through heartache.
What you have been doing has serious, even dead, consequences. Here are some examples:
Oral sex consequences (wow):
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Herpes information (yes, you can be born with herpes and it can spread even if there are no sores present):
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Mutual masturbation consequences (hpv, herpes):
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Proof that condoms are not 100% effective on preventing STD transmission:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
You CAN get pregnant while on the pill:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
STDs are extremely common; 80% of Americans have herpes:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
(Graphic) Photos of what STDs can do to your body:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
The financial costs of a pregnancy:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Who cares about virginity anyway? You should!:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
...seriously!:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
ANYONE can have an STD, even if they are a virgin:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
I hope you do what is clearly appropriate for you and take steps to work on yourself. If you have other questions like this, please feel free to ask me! :)
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No way is it slutty, ive been fingered douzens of times, not to be to boasty, ive been there and done it all, but to people who its a first, i was quite un sure at first but everyone has to try things but the advice i gve is, if you decide to go ahead and do it, make sure its not the first couple of weeks into the relationship, cuz other wise you're being used, not nesersaerly, but there ust do things with ya then dith then, then you'll look like nob (:
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<3
okayy.
being a slut,
means sleeping around.
i'm 14 and i've had sex and gotten fingered.
i do regret having sex.
but the fact that i was safe.
i'm okay with it.
as long as you're not doing it with a bunch of guys.
i think it's perfectly fine to be curious.
good luck.
<3
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aHHHHHHHHHHHHH DUHHHHHHHHHHH
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honestly, i kinda think its slutty and you wouldnt want stuff going around about you saying that you are a slut.. i made that mistake once and a lot of people take me as a slut and it goes on with you throughout your school years. so just think twice if you want to do it but if you do want to do it, its completely fine
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I'm not gonna call you a slut, because that's just mean. But...13 is WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY WAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY too young for anything.
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I wouldnt say slutty, because thats just kind of rude, but its DEFINITELY not right. You should wait a while on that one.
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its deff. not slutty i know alot of 13 year olds that have already had sex and done stuff much worse than that as long as you arent having oral sex or sex then i think its fine
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Honestly, yes? It's not good! You should go to Church and learn about these things. But, I mean if that's how you are, then ok.. I can't change it! :]
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I personly do. Its your choice but people are getting younger and younger and being sexualy active. At that age you are even to young to know why you do that.
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I'm sorry but I do. I personally don't think those things are appropriate unless your married, but that's me. At least wait untill you are older.
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Your not a slut for doing that, but if you can help it, try and wait until you are a bit older because if you do things like that now then it will lead to you doing more serious things.
Plus you will probably regret it if you lose your virginity this early on. :)
Vick x
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no not at all
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Honestly I came so close to getting fingered when I was your age a few months ago, but I wasn't ready. It's not slutty, because slutty is being engaged in sexual activity with multiple partners. What you did was just...frowned upon for your age. But it is what you think your ready for and nobody can tell you what your ready for except you. Do what you think is right. Goodluck
♥Shelby
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it's not slutty! don't ever let anyone call you a slut, if you're comfortable with it, then it's your decision. on the other hand, you are only 13, and I know your hormones are probably off the wall, but getting fingered and giving handjobs will eventually lead to other things, or give the guy the impression that you want more than that. a little advice: only do it if you know the guy knows you won't go any further. don't let anyone pressure you; you know your body and what it's ready for. just be careful, because there are a lot of creeps out there who will pressure you or try to make you go further than just fingering and handjobs. you are in control of your body, and if you're not ready for sex, try not to give the impression that you are. make sure you are prepared to make him stop if you want him to, and communicate. let him know what you're willing to do, and what you will not do. that way, he can't claim to have thought you wanted to, if you didn't. be careful, and don't let anyone call you a slut, and don't ever consider yourself to be slutty. most important, have respect for yourself. only you know what you're ready for, no one else can make that decision. i hope you make the decision that is right for you. :)
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No, it's not slutty. And don't listen to all the jerks on here that say that it is. It's natural for you to want to do this stuff.
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omg no ofcourse its not....DUH HELL YEAH IT IS because if a 13 year old does this now what is she gonna do later on???
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I'm 13. I know some girls who have done those things, & made fun of & called major slutts. You shouldn't be rushing to grow up. Once your grown up, your grown up. Its your decison though of course. If you want too, & you have no doubt in your mind, that its not a bad idea, then hey, what the heck.. go for it. If you do have just even one single doubt, wait. Besides, you can bleed from getting fingered, & such. =) So yepp. Its whatever you choose.
...Just remember the consequences.
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Hi, I wouldn't say it was slutty but I would just think about how old you are and are you ready for this kind of thing. You have still got plenty of time and years ahead of you. Daniel.
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no not at all, 13 is a fine age to start considering you've just turned into a teenager.
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Yes and no. It's not because it's only with one guy, but then again, you're 13. Most 13 year olds haven't had their first kiss. I think you're wayyyyyyyyyyy too young to be doing that. In a way I think it's slutty, and then in another, I don't. But I think you shouldn't be doing all this if you're 13. But that's just my opinion. =)
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ok dont listen to them ok its naturally not slutty but for your age it is bad..not goodyou should be discusted about it at this age...your 13 you shouldnt be going around being fingered and givin hand jobs at this age...what ever happend to simply kissing i mean seriously you can ohnestly get hurt being fingered what if he pops somthing or hurts you or something down there is very sensitive and hurts very very ez and if you do this stuff when you get older you will regret this remmeber what you did when you were younger think of your parents they would hate it if you did this...what if you had a daughter and got fingered and gave handjobs wouldnt you want her to stop and be angry she could easily say "what about you when you were my age you did worse things" anyways fingering and handjobs just lead to sex and then what will you do what if you get a disease or something girls your age get sick al the time for doing the things you want to do or who ever
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NOO its not slutty just dont go around doing it with a bunch of guys, n the ppl who say its slutty dont listen to them
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I don't think its slutty but then again i don't think its right. I think if this 13 year old wasn't in a relationship longer then 4 months, then their just easy to get to, which isn't good.
Hope this answered your question!
xoxo
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It really doesn't matter whether people want to call you slutty or not. What matters is how comfortable you are with it and whether or not you're ready. As a benchmark I wouldn't advise doing either of these things lightly at your age (or any age for that matter) and certainly not with multiple guys for the simple reason it will most likely give you low self esteem, particularly if guys your age start thinking they can just get what they want from you and nothing else.
If in any doubt don't do it.
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My defintion of being of being slutty is sleeping with a lot of different guys. So if you are only giving a hand job and getting fingered to a boy that you've loved for a while and not every guy you think is hott, then you're not slutty at all. I think your a little young to be going that far though. Just make sure you're comfortable with what your doing and don't make anyone do anything you don't want to.
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My advice is simply this. One, no, its not slutty, in a general sense. There are a lot of 13 year olds doing worse than that. Lol. But, if you have to ask, then its OBVIOUS that you arent ready and therefore its prolly not the right now for you. You should think about that. Thanks, love!
<3 Heidi
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Yes. If you're 13 and doing that I think it kind of is. Wait at least until you're in high school!
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If you feel comfortable with it, and you understand what you are doing, and why you are doing it then no.
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There isn't a right or wrong age for stuff like that. When you feel ready, then you are ready. No one can tell you when that is, but yourself.
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Sometimes it's not the smartest thing to do, but if you feel as though you are ready & you are comforable with your choice, then no one can tell you differnt. It's mostly what you think of yourself, and how you view stuff like that on your own personal level.
♥ me
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hahaha yeh i think its pretty slutty and umm dont do it and if you have..dont do it again! lol im not your mom i cant tell you what to do but take my advice dont make yourself seem cheap
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Yes, for only a 13 year old. I think your experiancing this wayyyyy too young.
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