|
How to not flirt
This guy likes me and keeps talking to me and I want to make sure I'm not accidently flirting with him. Can you tell what not to do? Thanks
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
You can judge yourself the best.
]
Well... if you don't want to flirt with him, never touch him, don't get flustered around him, and tell him VERY FIRMLY and even MEANLY if you have to, that you're not interested in him, and if necessary that his interest in you makes you uncomfortable.
If you're not opposed to his existence around you, then you can leave it there, but if he does something that bothers you: A, don't laugh at it. It's not funny, and giggling because you're uncomfortable is confusing to men. B, tell him to stop, that whatever he did is unacceptable, and that you would like him to leave you alone. If he fails to leave you alone, don't hesitate to get any kind of officials, school, parents, law, whatever, involved in keeping him away from you.
]
You have to make sure you don't say anything that is open to be interpretation be blunt. And if the "I really like you" conversation happens you must be entirely honest, there's no point giving him false hope because he'll just get more hurt later on.
Just make sure you don't flirt and just be natural, if your friends then be how you normally are to your friends. Don't get worked up about it some people can't take a subtle hint. If he's getting to deep, tell him how you feel.
]
There is nothing wrong in flirting with a guy if he likes you and you like him.
]
I am trying to understand what you're saying. You didn't leave me much to go on with so, allow me some... for lack of better words... levity.
I believe that flirtation is actually a two way process. Although some may note that "flirting" can be categorised as straightforward, others may do it subconsciously, and still some... subliminally.
You have to ask yourself some priority questions:
- Has anyone referred to you as flirtatious? (If you have been referred to as one, then I would recommend that you choose your words, both verbal or via body language, carefully.
- Has anyone gotten wrong signals from you? (If yes, then I would suggest that straightforward messages, untainted antics, and formal behaviour should be applied at all times, especially with this particular person.
- Do you find gratification when someone you like refers to you as flirtatious? (Subtle flirtation can actually drive people to get self-gratification. I mean no offence with this question, but you really have to ask yourself this.
- Do you consider yourself a "natural flirt?" (I always tell people to check themselves first being the better judge of themselves.
Although I strongly believe that in order for things to be factual, the truth should be unbiased, we as humans should always understand that "Right and Wrong" is subjected according to how a person sees them.
I would suggest for some time of self reflection first, and I am sure, the answer you're looking for would follow.
Back to what I was saying awhile ago, flirtation is a confusing and winding two way street. What you may consider as normal behaviour may be flirtatious to the person you're referring to, and vice versa. The only way you can be sure about this is to reflect on how you see first, and make adjustments accordingly.
The last question you should ask yourself is:
- Do I want to flirt with this person? (I added this because again, you didn't leave me much to work with, so I'm going to let you ask yourself that.)
Thank you so much for the question. And, I do hope this helps a bit.
Good luck.
]
I will tell you from experience, guys take SO MANY things as flirting. Just don't be extra nice I guess I would say. Don't seem overly nice because he could confuse that as flirting. Try your best not to act cutesy around him either. If conversation happens between you two, just be bland about it. Its hard for men to take hints so you have to try as hard as possible not to convey any type of flirting actions.Good luck!
]
My question(s) to you are 1 do you want to flirt or are you playing hard to get? Are you interested? I feel the best way is being direct with your actions. You can do that without being mean just be yourself. If you would like him to stop jyst say . I'm not interested in you in that way. (If you're not interested. I hope this has helped you .good luck!
]
First of all if you have no interest in him just be upfront and honest. Sometimes people misinterpret the situation and think that person is reciprocating feelings back. Being upfront and honest will let you know what type of person you are dealing with. Don't ever put yourself in a situation that will ever make you uncomfortable.
]
Well I can't just list things not to do because, everyone is different and what you may consider flirting I may not consider flirting. But I can say if you don't like him then don't lead him on and pretend that you like him back. There's nothing wrong with being nice and cordial but remember that guys sometimes take your niceness as being a flirt so just be careful. Hoped that I could help. Thanks.
]
Not really. Your body reacts on its own. I would just tell him I'm glad we are friends or something like that so he knows he is in the friends zone and staying there if that's were you want him
]
Psychology has shown thinking about what NOT to do leads to the wrong result (don't think about an elephant! First thing you think of? Elephant). Instead, think about how to be forthright. Tell him you're not ready for a relationship or not feeling any sparks, because otherwise you're most likely just delaying the inevitable. He will assume anything is a sign of
hope--talking, civility, cheer, basic kindness--it's human nature. Men are more prone to interpreting benign smiles as encouragement: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
Be as gentle as you can without being unclear, unless you like the attention and might want to consider dating him in the future. If that's the case, let him know where you stand. Most likely, though, if you don't feel it now, you won't feel differently later and it's better to let him go. Good luck.
]
You make subtle hints that you're not into him like omg you are such a great friend and lightly slap him on the back. I have had many issues like this and the best way to make sure that he knows you're not into him is to confront him and say "sorry, i don't like you in the specific way that you like me, but i still want to be friends." I know that may seem very awkward, but if you feel uncomfortable, you must say something. You could also try talking about a cute guy that walks by or ask for guy advice about some guy you like. I hope this helps!
]
What not to do? Well,body language is sure way of getting your point across.Crossing arms can be for one,turning your head slightly,almost like you have no intrest,guys will pick up on that and back away slowly. If a guy is still persistent,and you dont like him,just tell him straight,Im flattered but not intrested :)
]
It sounds like you don't have the same feelings for him. Let him know how you feel and tell him you just want to be friends, if that's the case. Don't show any emotions that may intend love or anything related to that idea. Instead, just be a good friend to him.
]
Do you like him too?
Well if he is flirting with you,you can carefully set aside those comments and ignore them.
And if he says something cheesy,don't encourage it.
I'm assuming that you don't like him and you don't want to lead him on.
So when he tries flirting,change the topic.
And talk to him about general things in life ie day to day life.
Sideline any flirty comments he makes and encourages you to do.
Hope this helps :)
]
Any type of kind behaviour can be mistaken as flirtatious. Why not just talk to this guy and let him know how you feel. Tell him you just want to be friends. Avoid physical contact like holding hands, snuggling up together, laying your head on his shoulder... things like that can send mixed signals. Also try not to compliment too much. Like telling someone you like their outfit that day is fine but things like you have a gorgeous smile, i love your eyes, youre cute... that is flirting. Good luck
]
Hi! So if you want to avoid flirting, here's a link to a place that covers most of the ways to avoid flirting:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
I hope this helped :)
]
You can of course be friendly with him. But i wouldn't always move over to stand with him unless he calls you over. Don't unnecessarily touch him too much. (like hand on the shoulder or hugging A LOT.) We can tell sometimes if we are coming off like in a flirty way. Just watch how you act around him :)
]
First step is don't twirl your hair.
If you twirl your hairs,he'll think your flirting and showing off your hair.
Second step is don't apply more than 2 layers of lip gloss.
If you apply too much lip gloss,he'll think you want to kiss him.
Be proud and be a dork.
If you change your personality around him,he might not like you anymore.
Please tell your friends about luluohizua on advicenators.com.You can reach me at luluohizua@yahoo.com.
]
If you believe he is talking to you because he is interested in you romantically then I have to assume from the nature of your question that you are NOT interested in him that way.I hate to make assumptions but I don't have a lot to work with here! First of all,flirting is not accidental! I am a female and I have never"accidentally"flirted with anyone in my life! Flirting is like teasing and innuendo, body language and subtle touching. Being friendly is polite responses and no signals or body language that would indicate otherwise. If you are doing nothing to encourage him and he still asks you out then just politely decline. Good Luck!
]
If you don't like him and don't want him talking to you, say so. I don't know hold you are but men in general and especially when they are young, will not get subtleties. If you give them any acknowledgment at all they think you are flirting with them. So don't make conversation at all. Just politely ask him to stop and leave you alone.
This is a good strait forward way to ask him to stop.
"I really don't want to talk to you. Would you please stop bothering me, you're making me uncomfortable, thank you."
If he still persist after that you might want to tell a teacher or parent because that is harassment.
Good luck honey don't be afraid to stand up for yourself.
]
The best thing to do is hint subtly that you're his friend nothing more.
Also, if worst comes to worst and you really think he's not getting the point, ask him advice on someone else you like.
It's often worked for me, as I'm gay (I hope this doesn't put you off my advice) but when guys hit on me, I slip in questions and start hinting that I like another girl, then eventually I just come out and say "you're my friend, and I kinda need help."
They ask "what for"
And I tell them "well I kind of like this girl and I don't know what to do/how to approach her"
Hopefully they still remain your friend
]
Hi there. This is actually going to be quite difficult. If he's spending time with you and talking to you AND he's got his eye on you as a potential girlfriend then there's a good chance he'll latch onto virtually anything you say or do and see it as a sign that you are interested. The bits that clearly aren't signs of interest he'll tend to 'filter out' (ie. ignore!). I see your point. You don't want to lead him on. You can't say "I like you but not in that way" until he comes out and says plainly that he DOES think of YOU in that way, eh? Talking about a guy you fancy is probably not a good idea. He might see it as a 'blind'. Or if he happens to know the guy in question, word might get back to him. (Of course, if there IS a guy you fancy and he knows him, it's a golden opprtunity. And you'll kill both birds with one stone mate!!). Making up a fictious friend of a relation (my brothers mate, etc) is risky. If it gets known the guy doesn't exist you'll look like a fantasist. Not a great reputation!). Only thing I'm seeing as a possibilty is this. You tell him that he's a great friend and nice and easy to talk to. Then look a bit unhappy/pathetic and say that you can't ever seem to talk to guys you're dying to go out with like this. Tell him you blush, get all tongue-tied. Mess it up. It's so unfair! Savvy? He might get the message with any luck. Practical stuff? Don't end up gazing long and deep into his eyes when you're talking. Especially if it's accompanied by a silence! Keep the full contact for two or three seconds max. Break the contact and pick it up again later. Don't want things getting too intense. Alternatively, you don't think about it or do anything. You just keep up the friendly relationship, and if or when he makes what is quite clearly a pass, you can give him the equally clear "I like you...but not in that way" line. He can't really say "That's not fair. You talk to me. I thought that meant you wanted to go out with me?" can he? You talk to lots of people, do you not? It is tricky, mainly because, as we've said he may see many things as a 'flirt' from you purely because that's what he WANTS to see. Any help? X
]
in my opinion, do not lead him on in any way. Do not say things like 'you're cute' and such, because that will make him think you're interested.
]
Hm.. Well, it's very hard to not accidentally flirt with someone, for they often can take being nice, as flirting. So I suppose try not to be too friendly, because that could come across as flirting. But not mean or anything, you can be nice, but just not too nice. Also, keep your distance and show that you're not interested. (Which I'm assuming you're not) like, talk to him only sometimes, rarely be the one to message him first, etc. it's best not to lead someone on, because not only can they use that against you, but it's just plain out cruel. So don't do things like show over interest in what he's saying, or say anything like you like them or anything like that, don't go to a lot of date like places with them like the movies, stuff like that. And if it comes down to it, you may just have to plain out tell them that you only see them as a friend or something.
Hope this helps~
]
More Questions: |