Hello there :)
Have had my share of experiences with people and relationships.
Love to help anyone who needs any advice.
Trying to understand human relationships through constant interaction and undertanding of myself :)
Gender: Female
Location: india
Occupation: student
Age: 22
Member Since: September 12, 2014
Answers: 17
Last Update: May 25, 2015
Visitors: 1467
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Hi,
I'm usually pretty good at giving advice, but this I can't help myself with. I'm 13 and I just got transferred to a new place. I've been here for two months now. As many people here are teens they love to act all grown up and I'm not comfortable with the kind of things they do and the language they use, so I'm not friends with anyone, I tried to adjust and get used to them but without a friend I just can't manage. I'm kind of shy but I can make friends easily, but no one is like me (a little kiddish and crazy) everyone loves to act all grown up. I'm having a tough time making friends, please give me some advice on how I can adjust or I'll end up a lonely girl who talks to herself (link)
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Hi there :)
Well its a new environment and in such situations its pretty common to meet different people.
Considering how it's easy for you to make friends,I suggest you try joining few clubs at school in which you're interested in. You have high chances of meeting like minded people.
If people try acting all grown up and sophisticated, doesn't mean you change Yourself to fit in. You can be yourself and still make friends.I suggest you inviting them home and hanging out.don't worry too much about they are. Be yourself around them, when they realize that's how you actually are, they will act normal. Hope this helps :)
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Personally, I have been very miserable all of my life. I have suffered from OCD as long as I can remember. I moved from New York to Florida when I was five years old. It was very traumatic for me. I have tried to commit suicide, but I just ended up in a mental institution. I do see a psychiatrist, but she does not help me. In fact, I only see her for the medication. I am absolutely miserable right now, especially with my job. I decided that I will no longer give any types of hints about suicide because I don't want to end up in a mental institution again. That did nothing to help me. I am going through preparations (getting my house ready, cleaning, trying to pay off bills). (link)
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Hi,
I understand things must be miserable for u right now. but don't give up life just yet. good things usually follow bad times. please hang in there.
you need to consult a good counselor and need to surround yourself with positive people and your family and friends.
hope everything will turn out fine for you.
I'm sure it will.
will keep you in my prayers.
much love.
you can always write to me,if you need some one to talk to.:) :)
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Hello,
My boyfriend and I are 17 and 18 years old. We started a long distance relationship a little over six months ago. Back then, I was still a virgin and he knew that. However, a few months ago I cheated on him and lost my virginity to a guy I honestly had no feelings for. I was completely aware of what I was doing and I did it because I really just wanted to get it over with. I made sure there were no feelings attached. Now, the guy still chases after me, but I want no business with him, or any other guy rather than my boyfriend. I love him to death and really have no trouble remaining faithful. I realized it wasn't worth it and he's truly the only guy I ever want to be with. However, I know that he'll want to break up with me and his heart will be completely shattered if he knows. He keeps talking about how magical he wants my first time to be once we finally see each other again. And I believe it will be magical because it'll be with him. I don't want to lose him, but I do think he needs to know. I also don't think it's any conversation to have via phone/text/video. A close friend told me not to say anything '"cause there's no point". I know if we were in the same time zone it'd be easier to confess and try to win his trust back, but I have a serious disadvantage by not being able to daily demonstrate my true feelings towards him. I've thought of telling him in the far future, once we're living together, but I don't know how he'll feel about it after such a long time...
Also, I'm actually kind of glad I did it only because it was extremely painful, and he wasn't the one who caused that terrible experience. The guy was gentle, so it would've been bad either way. Should I tell him when we finally meet again? If so, should I do it as soon as possible, or do I give it some time? If I do choose to tell him, I know I probably shouldn't have sex with him until he's known, but I'm terribly scared of ruining the possibility of a future with him.
I'd appreciate any thoughts and advice,
Thank you. (link)
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Your boy friend would be hurt and dejected if he finds out. He might lose trust in you and the relationship. Even if you tell him and convince him to understand why you did what you did, would he still be able to trust you how he did previously?
And if you tell him face to face, it would hurt him even more because you hid this fact for a long time.
Long distance relationships require a lot of trust. You are at a very impressionable age, it would hurt his confidence and trust in any relationship based on this experience.
If you decide to tell him (which you should), you should be able to handle the consequences.
If he is a very forgiving person, you might have another chance. Please don't lose out on good guys over the issue of being a virgin. Sex might hurt the second time you do it too, it all depends on the people in a relationship.
So next time you are tempted to stray, think about the other person who loves you abd trusts you so much that they want to be with you even if you are separated by distance. It's love if it survives the distance, don't take this for granted. Being faithful is one of the most important things in a relationship.
Hope all goes well :)
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This guy likes me and keeps talking to me and I want to make sure I'm not accidently flirting with him. Can you tell what not to do? Thanks (link)
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Do you like him too?
Well if he is flirting with you,you can carefully set aside those comments and ignore them.
And if he says something cheesy,don't encourage it.
I'm assuming that you don't like him and you don't want to lead him on.
So when he tries flirting,change the topic.
And talk to him about general things in life ie day to day life.
Sideline any flirty comments he makes and encourages you to do.
Hope this helps :)
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I have lied to my boyfriend his car handle fell off so I try to fix it with some super glue he came to my house that evening and asked me if I tried to fix his hand on his car with super glue and I stood in front of him face to face and I said no so he said well I'm going to call my son and see if he done it so you got a hold of his son and his son said no I didn't do it look at the cameras that you have at your house and it will tell who did it. So the next day when he left for work I text him that I did ithe forgive me for that stupid lie but he still broke up with me because I did it face to face if you truly love somebody you shouldn't have to lie to him you should tell them the truth what should I do I asked him for a second chance but he's not listening or even talking to me (link)
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Oh!apologize to him,tell him that you were not thinking straight and tell him that you wouldn't repeat this again.
Give him some time to process what had happened. Maybe he you should give him some space and try meeting him face to face and tell him.
The best you can do is apologize. There is not much you can do beyond this.if he understands this, you can work things out and gain his trust. Give him some time,he'll Come around :)
Hope this helps!! :)
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My husband and I's one year anniversary is coming up in a few months, and so is a very close friend's wedding, her wedding date: our one year anniversary. I'm at a loss of what to do. My husband wouldn't be able to come with me to her wedding, and my friend would be extremely hurt if I didn't go. What makes the situation awkward is I knew when picking my wedding date that my friend would be getting married that same day. I had no choice however (my husband is military). I reassured and promised her since she got engaged that I would be there at her wedding. In fact, as soon as I got the wedding invite, I texted her and let her know I would be there and how excited I was. My husband always knew I'd be going, but I guess it just clicked for him I'd be missing or first anniversary. He's very upset, anniversaries are very important to him. I tried reasoning with him that we could celebrate another day, but he's not having it. What do I do? I will always pick my husband over anything, but shouldn't he be more understanding? Should I be present for the most important day of my close friend's life and hurt my husband? Or be there with my husband for our one year anniversary and risk losing my friend? (And I have very few true good friends) (link)
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Hey there :) this is quite a tricky situation.
Is there any way you can attend the wedding for a while and then plan something with your husband?
I mean you could always talk to your best friend and tell her that you will be there for a while as it's your anniversary as well and u have plans with your husband. I'm sure she would appreciate the fact that you made an effort inspite of such a situation.
Talk to your husband and make plans accordingly so that you can devote your attention to both of them.
Balancing both the events would be your only choiy to not hurt either of them.
Plan a dinner date with your husband and spend sometime at the wedding prior to that and let your best friend know about it. She'd be happy that you've made an effort.
Hope I helped :)
Congrats on the anniversary though :D
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I am 15 and have been having my period for 3 years now and I masterbating regularly but I am a virgin. Well not long ago I noticed a lump iny vagina and it scared me to death please help me.what is it? Is something wrong with me? (link)
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I suggest you talk to your physician about it and do as prescribed.professional help may be required when its something related to your body.
I am sure its nothing dangerous and you need to keep yourself calm and take professional help.
Let me know if you need any help.
Good luck!:)
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I have known this boy since elementary school and we are seniors in high school now. I never really liked him in this way until this year.. I sit at the same table with him And 3 other classmates with whom we share a friendship with that's hard to explain. One of my girlfriends at the table knows how I feel towards him And she notices how we fight like a married couple. I really like him And he talks to me like I'm his wife or something. We argue all the time but I think it's just a part of our chemistry. My question is how do I know if he really likes me the way I like him or if he's just joking all the time. By the way he's only dated white And Hispanic girls in the past And I'm African American And so is he. (link)
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From what you have written here, he seems to be very comfortable with you. I'd like to know one thing though, is he this way with any of your other friends or just you?
If he is this way only with you, it is likely that he has feelings for you. And one of the signs that a guy likes you is when he teases you a lot and tries to make you smile all the time :)
So I'm guessing he likes you and if he is this way only with you.. It shows that he is really comfortable with you and wouldn't mind making
You his girl friend.
So you need to watch out for any signs where he hints that he wants something more than friendship. The fact that he has dated girls from other races shouldn't really be a problem. If he likes you then what race you belong to is immaterial :)
Try getting some alone time and see how things go with you, is he very protective or tries to spend more time with you alone or other wise are clear cut signs that he likes you. So watch out and pay aye attention to how he is around you.
Hope this helps.
Good luck :)
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I daydream a lot and I did a little research and I am not sure if it is a maladaptive daydreaming. I think it becoming a problem because I don't like pain. However, when I have a painful experience I create a scenario in my head. The scenario is even more painful but I am in control of what happens. During these daydream I get emotional because they are very painful experience but it worse than the pain I am going through. It my way to escape and process my emotion. I can cry without dealing with my actually emotionally pain. (link)
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Hey sorry for the late reply :)
Firstly do not do any research on your own to come to a conclusion.. It might not be something that you think it is!
The thing is by day dreaming.. We try to escape from our mundane life and go into something that we actually want to happen!:)
So I'd suggest you talk to a therapist about it, as they will be able to understand what exactly happens when you are going through the series of emotions like that!
Seek professional help is what I would tell you... There is little that we can help you with when professional help is required!
I'm assuming that you have gotten into the habit of making up scenarios which are bad.. So firstly tell yourself to stop thinking too much.. When u see yourself do that... Distract yourself and keep yourself occupied.
Let me know if you need any help :)
Take care :D
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my mom and dad are fighting im afraid they will get divorced.this happend last night two. once he accually tried to leave.he thinks since my mom is on her phone all the time he thinks that she is looking for someone else.He says he has no one to talk to and my mom does,witch is sort of true.but my dad talks to alot of people and with me being 9years old my sister 4,and my brother 1 they cant afford to break up,my dads parents want them to get divorced.i need help! is there anyway to stop it without getting in troble? I NEED HELP! (link)
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Hey sweetie!
Firstly you need to understand that every couple have their own share of fights and arguments.
When people fight and argue they do not process their thoughts and act irrationally.
One reaction could be storming off just like how your dad tried to.
So firstly you need to make sure that they can spend some alone time together.
With the stress of work and kids,parents tend to lose themselves.
So plan some dinner date or an outing that could really let them relax and enjoy.
Secondly, you can have a separate conversation with each of them, tell them how this scares you and you don't want to lose either of them.
When you show that you are worried about this, they will try to make things work and not fight.
Most importantly help them find themselves.
Looks like its the stress that affects marriages.
So help them do that :)
Hope this helps!
Good luck
PS : you can send me a message if you still need any help :)
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Ok so my first week back to school is the same week I have my period and all i have that week is testing but i also have P.E the same day and I REALLY want to wear my white pants because is finnaly winter and they are my favrotes and they go with EVEYTHING of mine but im scared that I might stane them, what should I do??? (link)
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Change your tampons/sanitary often or just double layer the packaging if you know what I mean.
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I live in nyc and I was wondering if you thought it was ok to adopt a puppy if you live in a huge city like this? (link)
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I'm sure the city you stay in doesn't matter.
Make sure you have enough resources to take care of the puppy.
Puppies are the most adorable pets in the world but they can be a handful and need constant attention.
Make sure you have the potty training and the vaccinations required planned out.
If this is all taken care of, they are the best pets ever.
No human can replace the joy that your pet dog shows when you come home.
I cannot keep pets as my schedule doesn't allow me to.
Lucky you!:)
Good luck with the puppy :D
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so i met this guy at a party, and when we were introduced we immediately clicked (or so i thought we did), we talked and talked for the rest of the night at the party, and when it was time to leave we left the party together and waited at the same bus stop together. at that time i was waiting for my ride and he was catching the bus 160, and so when the bus was right there, i was like "oh your bus is here" but he said that he would catch the other one. so then we talked for like another 15 minutes, i casually hinted for his number, so we exchanged numbers. then later that night he texted me. all the other times after that though i would be the first to initiate conversation. then there was this practice test at my university, and we were both there, during lunch break he came up to my table where my friend and i sat, and asked how the test went, and when i asked him where he was going for lunch, he said that he was just going to eat in the caf and that i could join him if i wanted. so we end up eating lunch together, but then after the practice test he never said bye to me. fast forward a few days after that, i initiated that we should study together and he said that we definitely should, and asked when i was free. so we make plans , and we studied together, and before he left, i said we should do this again, and he grinned and said yeah we should....but that was the last i heard from him. its been more than a week, and I'm just trying to see if he will text me first, but he hasn't....is that a good sign or bad ? is he interested or is he not ? i don't want to be clingy, or seem desperate... and i feel like I'm just obsessed and over analyzing the situation, should i just move on ? :( (link)
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Do you know if he's single?
Maybe he is still figuring out if he likes you or not.
Guys usually try to be your friend and then understand u as a person and if he sees that there are possibilities of more than friendship,they make the move.
I think you should give him some time.
Another week or so..see if he gets in touch with you.
You have initiated the conversations most of the times,maybe you should wait for him to make a move or plan an outing for coffee or movies or whatever.
Keep your self occupied. You over analyzing this situation is of no help.
If he gets in touch with you,it might have potential to become a relationship later on.
But for now,since you've been initiating the conversation, put that on hold.
When the guy sees that you're not texting him, hell come back to you if he is interested.
It shouldnt be a one sided affair where you end up being the needy one.
Doesn't help the ego later on :)
So wait around ,if he gets in touch well maybe you guys can build on your friendship and see where it goes.
Otherwise I'd suggest there are tons of fishes in the sea,move on :)
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I am a student from india and i need some opinions on what i did was foolishness or a good thing. I am in my final semester of my masters where i do not have class and have to do a project. Since i do not have class i will always be at home. Instead of sitting idle i thought i may go to work. So i attended an interview for a bpo(which is different from my field of study) and got selected and was all set to join. My mother and my sister were againist me joining as i had to work 6 days a week and also the pay was comparitively very less. I still went ahead no joining and went to my college to get my certificates for submission. When my teachers heard this, they were againist it as well. I did wanted to earn some money but after hearing all this i backed out. Was it the right thing to do? (link)
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Hello!
Having worked in the BPO sector,I know where you are coming from.The BPO sector lures youngsters like you with minimum qualification such as 10th and 12th grade for jobs and pay decently.
Since you are still studying,I understand extra money is always a bonus.
But right now your focus should be on learning. Since the chances of learning anything solid in a BPO Sector is hard to come by, you need to focus on finishing your studies and finding a job where u get to learn rather than making money.
If with experience and the knowledge that you gain,money will automatically come to u.
I'm hoping that the reason behind your family reaction is the same as my thoughts here.
Anyways it's a good thing you backed out.
Compete yout education and find a job that has great learning potential.
With experience and knowledge,money comes in automatically.
Best wishes.
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My partner and I have been in a relationship for three years. I guess I should mention, we are Lesbians. She is 66 and I am 68.
We presently live in my home of 25 years. It is in a rural area and far from everything. She would like to move into town and has bought a very nice home in a nice neighborhood. My house is older but in fairly good shape. She wants me to sell my house and move in with her.
Problem is, she has been dragging the move out for over a year with one problem after another as to why we cannot move. I have been trying to be patient but I am beginning to wonder if she really wants me to move.
The latest "problem" is that I have an elderly chihuahua who is not housebroken and despite my best efforts, he will not change. I have agreed to diaper him when he lives in her home but now she is saying because of the nice carpets, she wants me to kennel him at night. I simply cannot do this to such an old dog who always sleeps with me in bed.
She is a control freak in other ways.
Do you think I should just stay where I am? I want to move in with her but to sell my house and then be unhappy, well, I just don't know.
Any thoughts? (link)
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3 years is quite a long time to be in a relationship.Selling a property of your own and moving in is a huge deal.The little things that cause tension between the couple which go unresolved are the issues that become a major thing later on.
There might be a lot of reasons as to why she doesn't want to move completely.It would be a good thing if you could sit down and have a little chat with her.
As you are completely ready to sell and move out,the least she could do is accommodate an old dog which you adore.
From what I understand, you need to talk it out before taking a big step like this.it would be prudent for you guys to know how to work a live in relationship as it is quite a big step in any relationship.
Considering the fact that you are dating from 3 years,I am hopeful that she would see your point of view and understand.
Communication is key here.
Hope this helps.
Best wishes.
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I want to start working out is there anything you suggest? (link)
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Wanting to do something is quite a start! I personally think working out is more fun when you plan it with your daily chores! Walking instead of using your car to buy groceries is a start! Keep yourself active. If at work, allocate some time for moving around from your work station and then drink loads of water!
I usually use the treadmill and then follow it up with a quick ten minute workout that I learnt on YouTube!
Stay active and you're half way through :)
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Okay so I feel myself a lesbian because I like the girl in school....I think it's okay to like her but then I feel weird and not normal when I getting to like her.I REALLY WANT TO STOP!!! I DONT WANT TO HAVE A BAD FUTURE....Thank You (link)
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Hi!! It would help to know how old you are! Anyways, based on what you have written here, I can tell you that has nothing to do with you being a lesbian. Girls can like girls and it's perfectly normal! If I'm not wrong, it's called a girl crush :D
Anyways, there are instances where you would like a man and a woman and you have bisexual tendencies! Ours okay to admire the way they are as long as you don't go around thinking about them sexually! If you do, maybe you are still figuring out which gender you like better! If you are mature enough, date and instant how you are with men! That should help! And finally, it's definitely not wrong to be a lesbian. Irs what you want to be and that's got nothing to do with you ruining your life :)
Hope that helps!!
PS : I have had many girl crushes, but I like men better!!;)
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