about

well i am a 15 years old girl that is soft hearted and i loves helping other people out. i love giving out advice. i can relate to a lot of peoples problems because i have been through a lot in my life. i have done a lot of stupid things in my life that i regert but i cant change the past but i can try to change the future. i love to dance and enjoy life to the fullest. i love my best friends to death i would do anything for them..





advice

Ok, so There's my ex :). He used to love me - I know he did, until he fell out of love with me after around 5 months, and broke up with me. i was heartbroken for a very long time, but managed to egt over it until recently when we've started getting back together again in a very secretive way. He doesn't love me - I know that but he cares about me, and he's always there for me whenever i need him. We're together secretly and its a kind of 'not strings attached relationship', and we do stuff - but I know he also like this other girl. She's perfect in every single way to be honest, and I know he really really wants her - she's practically a 15 yr old pornstar! I think he wants her ina more of a sexual way, and she'd win no contest if it were me or her. Yet I think he cares about me alot more and likes my personality alot better. It doesn't help old feelings have stirred and I now feel very attached to him... so please please, I would love some help on this matter, just to express your opinion on my situation, and I'd love some advice on how just... to sort my feelings out, and how I should go about getting rid of this competition.

Thank you!

well i dont thinnk you need to worry if he only attracted to her for sex. stay by his side. dont give up on be the bigger person and not be his sex buddy that is what will win him again. if he likes you and cares about you he will come back to you. you just gotta give it time. hope this helps.
♥ Steph

[view]


Well, let's first explain the situation! We've been together 11 months now (me and the boyfriend) - nearly a year actually! I don't see us splitting up at all, at least any time in the future. At the start I knew I didn't love him - I fancied him, but it grew and now I can't imagine loving anyone else as much as him. He says he loves me too. We have a very slow moving relationship - or we did. At first I was horrifically shy - we first had a proper match of tonsil-tennis during the 2nd or start of the 3rd month. It was half a year before we started to move on from that onto other mild things, and it was around 8 or 9 months when we first started doing foreplay! Now we still haven't gone all the way but this is mainly due to lack of time alone and protection... he applies little pressure on me and seems content even though we moved incredibly slowly. Obviously there are times when there's more pressure applied but I find myself pretty willing at those moments - anyways. He says he loves me and I think I believe him but I'm naturally untrusting. I know that guys will stay stuff to get places and there are lots of examples of this in the kind of group my boyfriend hangs out in. I'm ready to go far with him, and take the leap but I want to know if you think there could be any risk of well, the syaing stuff to get places thing that I mentioned previously. Also, we're both virgins and we've tried it before... it didn't work! Any advice or stories on first time sex would be so useful I can't mention it. Thank you!

its really not a bad thing that you moved slow. me and my boyfriend have beeen together for 2 and a half years and i was scared to trust him to but because he proved to me he loved me by waiting for me and not pressuring for it a year in the realtionship it happened. what i did is a talked to him about it and he gave me feed back and so on. so my advice to u is talk to him about it but dont think your rushing into things only do it when you feel its right and most importantly use protection. hope this helped.
♥ Steph

[view]


i'm not quite sure what to do. i'm a sophmore, and i was kinda casually dating this junior. and i heard from several people that he was just leading me on. so i asked him about it and he said he was, but he had a reason. he said he liked me, and that he still kinda does, just not like he used to, and he thought the feeling would come back so he just didn't ever tell me. now here comes the tough part. what do i do? part of me wants to change his mind, make him see my true worth and make him want me again, because there's still hope because he still likes me. or should i just move on and completely forget about him? just say what you would do in this situation. also, if you would want to change his mind and make him want you again, how would you do it?

thanks :]

if a guy was leading me on i would say fuck him.. (i sorry dont take that offensiely) but a really man wouldnt do that he would tell you the truth not this little game. your in highschool now dont you think he should grow up and not play these lil games anymore. i would leave him and someone else. it woul make him so jealous to see you with someone else and see you happy with that other person. then he will feel bad because he would see what he was missing out on. hope this helps.

♥ Steph

[view]


Dear anyone,
me and my ex bf met 8 months ago, we broke up 4 times in a course of 2 months. he was my first everything, first love, frist kiss, first bf, and i have neverliked a guy in my life as much as him, we talked every day atleast 2 hrs and it was amazing. at the end i broke up with him bc things wer vrey shaky, for a while i had regretted breaking up with him alot bc if we stayed together i wudve been much happier, and i knew he still liked me afterwards. for the past 6 months i have cried over him atleast once a week, thigns are liek a rollercoaster, sometimes we h.u and sometimes we dont talk at all, i knw he h.us with other girls , this fact used to hurt me but not anymore for i have gotten used to it, just like i have gotten used to the fact that he h.us with all my frends. i still keep my phone next to me all the time in case he calls, wen my phone rings i hope its him calling, i still have the one rose he gave me , the thoguth of him brings tears to my eyes, teh last time we h.u wich was very recent- it was differnet that all the other times- it didnt have tht feeling of love between us, my eyes wernet even closed, i knw he was jsut using me for ass so wen i got home all i did was cry, i realyl want to get over him because i knw he is over me, ppl tht knw i like him knw i shud get over him as well, i really have tried and its been 8 months that ive liked him, once in awhile i think bout getting back with him but i will never really do it, the worst part is he thinks i h.u with other guys wen in reality the only guy i ever h.u with is him, i am so stuck on him i cud never even imagine being with another guy, i hate sleeping at nite because all i do is think about him. i really lvoe him and he doesnt even realize it and wen ppl tell him he doesnt believe them, last nite i was hysterically crying for 3 hrs till 1 am, my hoel family woek up and my parents were sitting next to my bed very concerned, he called me and i did not anser wich made me cry more becasue its rare that he calls, and tht i dont anser, its just tht i was crying so much i cudnt anser the phoen, i woke up in the mornign nd my eyes wer puffy, teh hole day i was in a bitter mood and was sleeping in all my clases. i know this is pathetic. i really miss him and want him to care about me but thers nothing ican say to him to make him care.. i guess its the type of person he is.. his best friend also told me tht he never liked me and was just using me for ass, its hard for me toexcept this fact, i refused to cry today. i need to get over him PLEASE HELP! this weekend i am going to be with him and i need help before i drown in my own tears-
-LS

if he is the cause of your unhappyness then when be around him. you dont need someone to put you down and make you sad all the time. you need a guy that will make you happy 24/7 not this. i doubt that you want to live the rest of your life like this ove one guy. you need to eb strong and get through it. what doesnt kill you should only make you stronger. you have to learn from your mistakes and be able to take risks. your frist love is the hardest to get over but you need to or you will just be miserable your whole life. try findind a new guy to take ur mind off of him. dont waste your time on him if he doesnt do the same for you. if he really did care about you he will come back to you. Dont cry over him because he isnt worth your tears and the guys that are wont make you cry..

♥ Steph

[view]


No matter how hard/long I suck, I can NOT give a hickey to my boyfriend! I start making these weird sucking type noises also, is that even normal when giving a hickey? Anyways, what's wrong? Why can't I give him a hickey? The only reason I'm really worried about this, is because he get's really turned on by them, and I want to be able to give him one. PLEASE HELP!

tryin BITTIN.. NOT hard you dont want to hurt the guy but nibble on his skin. you might want to also squeeze the skin with your teeth. hope this helps.
♥ Steph

[view]


ok i have heard of sexual turn ons like biting of necks n kissing of necks and others but blowing ears? i mean i heard of it but how does that do anything? any reason? so...and rubbing of bellies..ye haha what does that do, i mean how does that turn someone on? i have heard of it so um...help?

yu. the blowing the ear works. because when i am really into it with my bf and he blows softly(keyword) it is a big turn on. or bits on the ear softly. it all really depends

some people like it others dont.

hope this helps.

♥ Steph

[view]


I am a female and have been with my boyfriend/fiancee' for about 2 years. I recently moved away to college and had to leave him behind because I have to live in a dorm my first year. I visit home all the time and spend most of my time with him and not my family. I love him, and he loves me, I know this I really do, but lately all he has been talking with me about is that he wants to have sex with other people, that love and sex are not connected in his mind and that he is sexually attracted to another person, but not in love with them. This makes sense, and I understand him, but I told him that if he wants to have sex with another person, we are not together because I am not going to be waiting at home while he has sex with another. He doesn't understand that it's cheating on a person when you sleep with another while dating. He doesn't think that he should choose one or the other, he wants both. He thinks that I don't love him and that I don't understand him/ want him the way he is. The thing is I don't want him to resent me if he decides that he wants to stay with me and not have sex with other people and that I want him to see my point of view on this. I want him to understand me because he doesn't get what it would be like, he keeps telling me that I could have sex with other people as long as I didn't get attached to them, which he says I would do. I keep telling him that I don't want anyone else, but he doesn't think that he would get hurt because of it, if I did in fact sleep with another person.
I really have no idea what to do. I want him to be happy, which would mean giving him up, but I want to be happy myself, which would mean we would stay together and he would "forget" that side of him. Any advice on this, any thoughts that you have would be nice. I really appreciate you all taking time to read and answer this. Thank you.

i honestly dont think a realtionship should be the way he is putting it.when he says he is attracted to someone in a sexual way that is kinda messed up. he should only be attracted to you sexually,mentaly, and physically. nobody else. when your attracted to someone there is something about that person that you most like. he should ahve to choice. he cant have his way.. if you think detailed about this other person might have aids, might get pregnant, and you dont know what or who she has eben having sex with. then he would come back to you and might try having sex with you. i dont think so. if you love soemthign le it go if he loves you back he will come back to you adn he WONT do somethign like that. otherwise it is time to move on. ( i am sorry)

♥ Steph

p.s.
i hope this helps.

[view]


how far do you think an average 14/f should go w/ her bf?

nobody can really answer your question because the way you feel for your boyfriend is your feeling nobody elses. it is how far do YOU want to go..hoep this helps.

♥ Steph

[view]


i love doin lil romantic stuff for my girl. i give her notes, got her a necklice, gave her my jacket, kiss her on the cheek when she doesnt expect it, whats some more romantic stuff i can do for her. I love doin it, it makes me so happy to make her smile and laugh so if you got any good ideas id love it

maybwe take her to the ebach and watch the sun set with her.. flowers is a good idea.. kissing her on the forehead. maybe a ring. dont get pricey with it because girls really dont care (or at least shouldnt) like what u can do is go to a grocery store and get her one of those 25 cent rings. or if you want get her like one for about 10-15 dollars.

hope this helps

♥ steph

[view]


Im crazy in love with this boy.
He's my bosses son. And 4 years older than me. We've been going out for almost a month - but every time we fight ... even if its over something little his soultion is to break up ... and then call me an hour later and say he's sorry ... i just dont know what to do ... i've asked him why he does it ... and he didnt really give me a clear answer ... should i break up with him once and for all? Please help!
18/f

i think you should get over him.., i mean think about it. say if you guys get married what is he gonna do diveroce and then remarry whenever he feels like it.. i mean coem on i bet you want a serious realtionship not something crazy like this. if you want to try to make it work then try talking to him but i dont think it is really worth it..

♥ Steph

[view]


k, so i don't know how long this will be but oh well. i'm 16/f. i was dating the same guy for 2 years. he broke up with me because he thinks i'm never happy. he's never serious and he thinks i'm too serious. i've been getting over it, and now i like another guy (and i don't think he likes me back) but yeah, this past week,my ex has been telling me how much he wants me back and he loves me, then last night he came to my house and told me he's seeing a girl he cheated on me with last year. my ex told me he would go back out with me if i were "happy". idk why i'm not happy with him. i was with him a lot of the time we were dating.. like we saw eachother almost every day, but he wants to be w/ his friends all of the time. what could i do to be happy? or should i just forget about my ex and try to go for the guy that i have a crush on and i'm too nervous to talk to him because i haven't really flirted in 2 years. what should i do? any answer is good. =]

besides the fact that you werent happy with ur ex. i mean he cheated on you. i have learned that once a cheater alwasy a cheater. and he is still seeing that girl fuck him.. you dont need a boy in your life you need a really man that will treat you like a pincess and that will amke you happy and wont cheat on you no matter what. you need to forget this fool. go and find urself a really man =) i would suggest to try to go and talk to your crush.. dont let your ex stop ur life.

♥ Steph

[view]


Hello. I am 14. I need help, because I just started a relationship with this kid that I really liked last weekend, and I am really confused. We've been going out for a week and a half now..and I really like him. The thing is, I liked to be single. But I don't wnat to break his heart..or mine...and I don't wnat anything to be different between us either. I just liked being single. What should I do?

Sincerely,
Boy Troubles

if you really like him stay with him try to make it work. your not used to being taken that is what it is. i would say give it about anohter two week and see what happens. if you still dont see a change then leave him.

♥ Steph

[view]



Good afternoon,
Okay..in the begining it was all about him what he wanted too do what he wanted he cheated on me a coupple of times with various girls one being a stripper...ah mean after a year i turned too the only other person i cud trust my ex ..and then well we kissed and thats all and my boyfriend found out...oo well and well too realease his anger he choked me off in town ..ah mean it was a bit embarssing at the time and i forgave him ..but then as time passed he began too tell me more hurtfull things when he got mad and so i turned too another friend but this time the realtionship was different we werent intimate but if i alloweed it it would goo there
bascially my bf doesnt trust me for varyin reasons some i may have given himm,, he says i lie to my parents but the only reaason i lie to them is beacause that the only way i go and lime with him ..soo now i rly dont kno what too doo need ur advice!!!shud i move on and forget abouthim and what should i do about the other guy.. lost in love

CaribbeanQueen
Age:20
Female
St.Vincent and the Grenadines

your boyfruiend seems very agressive and hurtful. you should never go otu with aguy that treats you like shit. thta is like the worest thing you can do. think about which guys treats yopu better. which guy you wnat to be with more then make your decision. i cant make it for you but i can tell you from what it sound like, you friend sounds like a better person then your boyfriend. i hope this helps.
♥ STeph

[view]


I was on my boyfriends myspace account and reading the messages that nobody else can read and there was one to a gay guy saying...

"im not gay but i think your wicked cute we should hang out sometime"

i dont know what to think.
i mean i think hes gay but i dont want to.
if he was than why would he be dating me?
Anyone help pleaseee!

i wouldnt jump to conclusions. ui would talk to him abotu and find out what is up. i mean it isnt like you dont look like at a celebrity(female) and think i wish i could be like her you know.. just talk to him about it and see what is up.

♥ STeph

[view]


my boyfriend is two years younger than me. is it bad? i mean he acts alot older and we really do like eachother..

nope there is nothing wrong with that. as long as ur happy and he is happy then there is nothing wrong with it.
♥ Steph

[view]


I am 21 and just recently lost my virginity. About ten minutes after we had sex I started my period. Is this normal? I normally start the first of each month and I already had my period for this month, I had sex on the 24th.

it is unlikely for it to be ur period i think you just got ur cherry popped.

♥ Steph

[view]


ok well heres the thing ive been going out with my boyfriend scence last tuesday. and i feel kinda distant from him i guess. also im kinda worried because i heard this rumar recently that with every girlfriend he's had, he's had sex with. and im not that type of girl, i think he might know that..but still i dont want him to be takin it too slow. i mean we dont hold hands we havent kissed yet. we've only hugged. i just want him to know its ok to kiss me.. what shoyuldi do to give him the hint??

the ebst way to solve your problem is to talk to him and explain to him how you feel. tell him that you dont want to be moving to slow or to fast. and about the rumor. well rumor arent true (well most of the time)if you want to know the truth the only way to find out is to ASK him for the truth. if he cares about you he will respect your opion and wont try to make you have sex with him if your not ready(or whatever is the reason). hope this helps =)

♥ Steph

[view]


ok I'm really confused right now, i Dont know what to do right now. I like my boyfreind brandon, but he can be a huge asshole. he tells me what and what not to do, he critisizes me, and even yells at me, plus he has problems of his own and i can't deal with him and his problems AND my problems alltogether.he also hides things from me, lies to me, and sneaks about everything. I can't ever beleive him. all my freinds say i should dump him, but i still like and care for him. plus he's not ALL bad. i really enjoy being with him. There's also a guy named Russell who seems to be interested in me, and ditto for me. Me and him talk alot on the phone, and he helps me with alot of problems, and I like him too, but i dont want to leave brandon then go out with russell right after, but if i wait for a while then break up with brandon, then russell gets a girlfreind and loses interest in me, then that would SUCK ASS TOTALLY. i dont know what i should do. should i break up with my boyfreind, or give him 1 last chance. If i DO give him 1 more chance, then this will be the 3rd chance i have given him, and im TIRED of playing games with him. what the hell should i do??

tell brandon that you feel this realtionship is horrible and un order for himt o treat you bette is for him to start seeing new people. and then break it up adn go with Russel like get close with him but dont ask him out let him ask you out.


♥ Steph

[view]


me and my boyfriend have had the same problem for like 8 months. he only rarely makes time for me. but we broke up for a month and we got back togheter and he said that he would fix it cuz he really wanted it. HE CAME BACK TO ME .. you know.

but nothign changed, so i confronted him. and hes like well 'well shoot for hangin once or twice a week', and so far he's made no effort.

so is it unfair of me to give him two weeks and if he still makes no time for me i stop giving effort to the relationship. im sick of feeling like its one sided feelings, cuz what he says is so different from what he does. i just dont knwo what i should do .. any ideas?

explain to him that you dont like feeling like this is a one sided realtionship. tell him mayb when we first broke up it was a good thing because of the fact it really didnt matter..
♥ Steph

[view]


My husband and I have never really been to close since we got married, mostly because I'm starting to find him boring and inconsiderate. While I was his girlfriend, I was a lover. Now that I'm his wife, I'm his slave. Anyway, he's has in the army and away from home for the past year. I got lonely so I started hanging out with some friends (both guys & girls mixed). I ended up starting a semi-romantic relationship with a man who had just lost his wife during her labor. So I helped him with his daughter and we just leaned on each other for support. Then my husband came home unexpected one day and caught us sharing one of the few kisses we've ever had together. So now my husband is fuming and wants a divorce, plus, he thinks the man's daughter is my child! He won't believe a word anyone says! Do I just divorce him and take it as a blessing in disguise, setting me free, or what?

if you are not so into him anymore then yea but before you go to all of that i would prove myself right about the girl not being your daughter. go and get a DNA test and show him that you werent lieing. and in the end be like i need a husband that will trust me, love me, and believe me.

[view]



<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>

eXTReMe Tracker