NinjaNeer's advice column

askNinjaNeer

advice column ask question view feedback favorite columnist advicenators

Q: i heard that if you eat only cottage cheese and water for i think two weeks, youll lose 10 lbs. is this true?..

You would likely lose weight... and end up with serious vitamin deficiencies.

You need nutrients from all sorts of foods in order to stay healthy!

Q: Is it possible to get pregnant through clothes? i dont just mean underwear, but through our underdwear, jeans, and his pants. my period wont come also, and im really nervous. but thats as far as he and i have gone. please answer men asap because im terrified.

18/f

Absolutely not. Sperm aren't that determined.

Don't worry about irregularity. It could be stress, sickness, or any number of things.

-- I'm really not sure how I could answer this question any better... feedback? Why hasn't anyone received a rating better than 4? Everyone has given a valid answer, and somehow nothing has been satisfactory. Maybe if you were more specific about what you're asking?

Q: You know on every food there's this nutrition info on the back or side like fat, sugar calories, etc?

Can someone tell me what each thing in that list is, what it does to your body, and if I'm supposed to have a a large amount with that or small number of it? (Get a box of something so you'll know every word that it'll list)

thank you so much for the trouble!

That's easy to do yourself; nutritional labels list percentages next to the amounts, right? So just look at that. If it says 55mg of sodium, and 2% next to that, you know that you're only consuming 2% of the suggested daily value.

As for calories, the suggested amount is different for everyone depending on lifestyle, weight and sex.

-- If you'd actually read my answer, you could see that I did in fact answer your question. The suggested daily value is the amount that it is suggested you consume every day. Therefore, you get all the information that you need.

Also, I believe that cigarettes don't come with nutritional information.

Q: i need help with swim suits. i am probably going on a vacation in a few weeks that i will need a bathing suit for, and i want to find a flattering one.

i'm 14, and about 5'3" maybe 5'4". i guess i have a kind of athletic body, but i have a tiny bit of fat on my tummy and i dont like that lol. im a 34c so i have trouble finding suits that fit right in like juniors stores. i think i look kind of weird because from the front i look wide i guess... because i have hips and im short so i dont have much of a waist. but from the side i look pretty thin.

sorry if that was hard to understand. can anyone help me out?

My suggestion is to go to a bathing suit store (like Bikini Village) if there's one nearby, and ask the salesperson for help. They always know what looks good, and they can make suggestions based on your price range.

Never be afraid to ask for help! That's what they're there for.

Q: ok i hav 3 questions,

1. i'm doin this english project and i need to create a dual timeline. wat exactly is that? my teacher said its like a spilt timeline where on one side theres a timeline about the author's life thats being compared to the other timeline about the outside world. i don't really 100% understand that. does anyone hav an example of one? i understand things way more better when im given an example of it.

2. to me this might be a bit random but, i noticed that my computer doesnt hav one of those floppy disk slots and i was wondering if anywhere in the world if there was some sort of device that i can connect to my computer and put a floppy disk inside that device and use it on my computer. my computer is a hp pavilion and just now i noticed somthin else, since it doesnt use floppy disks does that mean it uses some sort of memory card that acts as a floppy disk? cuz i noticed these slots for memory sticks. heh i'm not really good with computers.

3. my final question is there a FREE to use computer program and that i can download for FREE so i can download songs and music videos. something like limewire but is there one where i can download music videos and drag them to itunes and that are able to be played on my ipod? i kno i hav to purchase music videos but there was this one time where i got this video from limewire and som how i got it in my ipod except the problem was no sound was played.

I can answer the first two (I know NOTHING about iPods.)

1) Pretty much, they're trying to get you to understand why that author would have written the way they did. For example, look at movies over the past while. In Bond movies (which were released during the Cold War) the villains were generally Russian/Eastern European. Recently, though, the villians tend to be Asian or Middle Eastern (think about the rise to power of Japan, and the recent terrorism thing). The important part (the part that the person below missed entirely) is that the two are related.

2) You can buy an external floppy drive. The problem is that major companies have pretty much stopped selling floppy disks! Floppies have been made obsolete by the appearance of inexpensive USB thumb drives. You can buy those at any electronics store. They hold a lot more than floppy disks, and they're more durable.

Q: my "best friend" is going after a guy I like. I introduced them and I told her I liked him before she even met him, but now she's going after him behind my back and aparently he likes her.. am i the one being messed up or is she?

Well, she isn't being very nice, that's for sure. However, you can't let it get in the way of your friendship. I let that happen to me in high school when I was in the same situation, and I'm still not talking to the girl.

Remember that boyfriends come and go, but friends are forever.

Q: does walmart have good bras. like ones that do both push up and are padded? like i have one bra and it says that im a 30 A and i got it from walmart but not its like a little too small and i want one that does some serous push up and is padded so my boobs look bigger. i might go later tonight..thats why.
thanksss. !

Just a warning, push-up won't necessarily make you look any bigger! If you don't have much to push up, there won't be a huge effect. Push-up bras are made for enhancing cleavage, not making your breasts look bigger.

That aside, Wal-mart should have a bunch. That's where I used to get mine.

Q: 22 female/big sister.

Yesterday my 11 year old sister called me up in tears because mom wouldn’t stay out of ‘her business’. She was hazy on the details, but from what I can gather, there is some bullying going on at school, and knowing my sister, she probably isn’t only a victim is all this.

Normally I can give my sister some really good advice, but this time I was rather stumped, probably because in my opinion an 11 year old doesn’t have their ‘own business’ beyond choosing how to spend their allowance and whose friend they are going to be. Privacy and autonomy are something they are in the process of earning, not something they receive just because they understand the ideas now.

But now, as I reflect on it, I wonder if I’ve become one of those judgmental adults who has forgotten how to relate to adolescents…

I gave her the normal “Mom is doing this cause she cares and no one expects you too solve all your problems by yourself” speech, but what I really wanted to say was “Well if you don’t get into stupid fights you wouldn’t have this problem!” Am I wrong to think that her expectation of being left alone in this is unrealistic and what would you have told her on how to deal with our mom getting involved with her teachers and school about some issues she was having with an others girls?

I agree with you. I'm 19 and have a 15 year old sister, and we have the same conflicts all the time. Since I moved away from home, my policy has become "Mom and Dad are always right", and it drives her up the wall.

As long as she lives under your mother's roof, and ESPECIALLY at age 11, she has no 'business' of her own. She is still a child, regardless of what she thinks, and she can't necessarily handle everything on her own.

Q: To start i am almost 18 and my bf is 18. My bf and i have a 13 month history (we took a couple month break..but now i would say we have a solid relationship)
Today we went to a WWE wrestling thing and he was fascinated by the divas (they were just wearing lil mini skirts with the thong showing..ugh)..annddd today he was determined to get his S.I swimsuit edition..he likes that kind of stuff and claims its normal. it just pisses me off..and noww after this wrestling show he asked me how i would feel if he goes to a strip club..what do you guys think about this?? i hate how he drools over them ..and likes his stupid magazines..and his lil porno videos he burns off the internet.
any input..is this normal? do i let him have his fun at the strip club?..

Not only do I have a boyfriend, most of my friends are male. So I've learned over time that yes, this is normal.

Men are visual creatures. They like to look at things. However, unless it's detracting from the attention he's giving to you, it's not a problem.

I would advise that you talk to your boyfriend. Lay down some ground rules; what are you comfortable with? A 'look but don't touch' policy is best.

Another suggestion; look around for some porn that you like. Try watching it with him, making it more of a couples activity. His eyes will pop out of his head, trust me.

Q: Hey I have a problem. I am a CHRISTIAN and BAPTIST and there is this boy I really like he's cute, nice, kind, funny, understands me, and he doesn't just judge me on my outward aperance atleast it seems that way. Well, I really like this guy but, he's not a CHRISTIAN!!! And, I've tried to let go of him beleive me but, it's not that easy!!!I told him I din't like him anymore but, then I would cry cry cry and cry. Every love song semmed to remind me of him and I couldn't bear to see him at school. I asked GOD why are you doing this to me help me stay strong did I ,no!!! I gave in and I am madly inlove with him again. And, when I say madly man I mean it!!! He's always there for me. I don't know what to do i can't witness to him beacuse if i did he would only become a CHRISTIAN for me not because he wants to or understands that he needs to. I've PRAYED to GOD and asked HIM for HELP. And, I know i need to be PATIENT. But, i feel that evenwhen GOD says let go of him i refuse not to and won't.In just need advice on how to let go of him or is there a way to make both god and this guy happy. I doubt it but and help would well help!!! Sorry if this is confusing or to long. Just someone try to gove me the best advice possible I won't judge you!!! Thanks. And GOD BLESS ya'll!!!

Well, I may not give you the kind of answer you want, because my religious beliefs differ greatly from yours (I'm an atheist).

The way I see it, there's no reason why you should have to let him go. Contrary to what some Baptist churches say, a good Christian will accept and love people for who they are, regardless of their beliefs. If he's a good person, then his religious beliefs shouldn't matter to you.

However, if your religion is something you want to share, you can bring it up and 'witness' to him. Just don't make it a requirement for dating you, or, as you said, it won't be because he wants to.

Remember; he doesn't judge you, so you shouldn't judge him based on what he believes!

-- ADDITION:

"Just someone try to gove me the best advice possible I won't judge you!!!"

Right. Just because I didn't give you an answer you wanted to hear, you judged me.

My point was, who are you to say what God's will is? How do you know what God wants? If there is a God, and he doesn't want you to be with this person, why did he make it so that you two would click so well? Where in the Bible does it say that you can't be with a non-Christian?

Q: First off im 15 F. And I know alot of people aren't going to like this but whatever. All of my life i have never gone to church or anything, and I want to, like I want to have a church family and everything and I really would like a place to talk about my spirituality. But I cant find a church that I like. As for my religion, I basically have christian based values, but anyways here are my beleifs.

1. I beleive in god as a force and not a being.
(basically I believe in god as love in general.)
2. I dont believe in the devil. I think that was a
a story made up to scare people that if you sin
you will go to hell.
3. I don't believe in hell. I believe there is
heaven and thats all.
4. I know there was a man named Jesus and he taught great lessons, but I dont believe he rose from the dead and all that.
5. God is Love and Sin is Evil.
6. And last, people should be entitled to their own religion without anyone giving them a hard time.

Anyways, there is just a basis of whatI believe. So my question is, do you know of a church or religion that is basically all of those?

Also, I had this idea, maybe I could start a website forum where people could talk about this, sort of like starting my own religion,(hehe that sounds weird). Do you think many people would join me on that? Do you think anyone believes the way I do?

Any way, sorry its so long. I just really want to talk about what I believe and where I'm from, you would get beat up because everyone is very conservative baptist around here. Like I am the only democrat at my school. : ). soo, if you have any views on this, please tell me. Just keep them nice. Thanks in advance!!

I've done a little research, because your views don't seem to really mesh with any traditional religion. Here's what I've found.

New Thought:

http://www.beliefnet.com/index/index_10290.html
- This one really works with the idea of God as a force, and no Hell.

Baha'i:

http://www.beliefnet.com/index/index_10041.html
- This one is more about God as a force and freedom of choice in religion. It's an offset of Islam, but don't let that scare you!

Of course, you won't find a church that's custom-molded to your beliefs, and unless you live in a major city, it may be hard to find a more obscure place of worship.

As for what everyone else is saying about the heaven/hell issue... nuts to them. You're absolutely right! True belief in religion doesn't spring from being terrified of doing the wrong thing and ending up in Hell... it comes from trying to better yourself and be a good person using its teachings. You definitely have the right outlook on religion... and as an atheist, I've seen a lot of people with the wrong ideas.

Good luck!

Q: Why would someone decide to go to a technical college instead of a community college or university?

Well, the person above told you about why you'd pick a technical college over a community college, but I'll explain why you might pick it over a university.

I was at a university last year, but I'm doing a degree program right now where you get a degree in technology from the university in my town, and a diploma from the college. I'm taking classes at the college.

At a college, you get smaller class sizes, more individual attention from instructors, and more hands-on work. Also, it can be much less expensive to attend, and sometimes the programs are shorter. By no means does this mean that you're getting less of an education; you're just getting more practical knowledge and less theoretical useless junk.

Q: Today was my first day of track. After running almost two miles...I couldn't go any farther. My throat began to close up, my chest felt like it was tightening, i could barely breathe & when i could...it hurt more than anything. Well, I left earlier & my mom took me to the allergist, who said I had Bronchial spasms. They said what I had was an asthma attack, though, and gave me an inhaler. That moment in track earlier was the scariest moment I have ever had in my life, so I'm not sure what to do. Even though they gave me an inhaler, that's just for the coughing afterwards I think. I don't know, but should I continue track or not?

I have exercise-induced asthma too, and I've learned that the best thing to do is to stay away from heavy cardio. I know what it feels like to not be able to breathe, and it is terrifying.

You don't have to abandon exercise entirely though! I personally love walking and weight training. I actually took up karate, and it was one of the best things to happen to me. Swimming is also highly recommended.

Q: I'm 16/f. I don't even know how to begin, just I think I might be bipolar. I've been feeling like this since October, and not just once in a while. Almost every day I think about it. I've looked it up on the Internet and I have almost all of the symptoms. But it's hard to put down everything here, to explain everything that has happened and stuff. Me being bipolar would explain a lot of things. What should I do? How can I know for sure, without seeing a doctor? Thing are getting to be too much. Thanks.

You have to see a doctor. Your doctor may refer you to a psychiatrist for further diagnosis.

You should never self-diagnose. Only a medical professional has the knowledge to properly judge your condition.

Q: Hey,
Lately, my asthma has been really bad.
I have a humidifier, I use my inhaler, etc.
Are there any ways to help it?

Mine has been really bad lately too...

First of all, Singulair is NOT an asthma medication. It's an allergy medication that may help with allergy-related asthma symptoms. Talk to your doctor about trying a different medication. You can't just stop taking it because it doesn't work... it may take more time, or it might not be the right one, but either way you should talk to your doctor. They may put you on a stronger medication (like Prednisone) for a little while until it lets up.

Don't use your humidifier. I had one when I was little, and apparently they make symptoms worse.

If you have to go outside, wear a scarf over your nose and mouth so that you're not breathing really cold air.

Avoid doing any heavy exercise (obviously)

Stay away from your known triggers and make sure your house is vacuumed regularly.

Q: I am a freshman in highschool and i received papers from my school and the superintendant Stating that i could have the option of graduating a year early. which would mean i would be in the class of '09 instead of 2010. I already have my career planned out and what i want to do with my life and so i should accept it and graduate early right?? Well im not so sure that i want to. i mean, i dont want to leave my friends, and i know you guys will probably say " Put your life infront of your friends ". But im not to sure on what i want to do. Any suggestions?

Don't do it. Yes, it's a great opportunity. The problem is, you're only a kid for so long, and you shouldn't feel all that rushed to grow up.

University is really stressful, and an extra year to prepare will help you be even more ready for it.

Enjoy your youth while you have it!

Q: im really body concious and sometimes it gets to the point where i hurt|harm myself. i used to cut and i was annerexic. i am no longer neither but today my boyfriend asked for nude pics. and im 13 but usually i would be like YEAH BRB I NEED TO TAKE SOME. but lately ive just been more depressed than usual. i dont eat much anymore. ive been wanting to cut i even attempted to cut. i havent wanted to kill myself though. i just dont know whats wrong with me. i dont want my mom or dad to know. and i dont want physcological help anymore either. nothing online or in person. i made up a random excuse not to. but its jsut that i can find more flaws in me than good things. i dont even think i do have good things. my question is. what can i do?

Two things;

Psychological help does work. I battled an eating disorder between the ages of 10 and 15, and came out just fine. You just need to put the effort into it. A psychiatrist won't magically make all your problems go away, but they can help you to decide how to fix them.

Another, as a side note... for your boyfriend's sake, don't give him nude pictures of yourself. It's illegal, even if you're the one sending it. He could be charged with possession of child pornography.

Q: Okay so i have a flat stomach but i have big hips! And i hate it cuz it makes me look bigger than i really am. So how the heck do you get rid of them!?

Thankss

Hate to break it to you, but you can't get rid of hips. They're bone, and no amount of working out will get rid of them!

If it's any consolation, you'll be much better at giving birth, and you'll have a much more womanly figure than those stick straight girls!

Q: So about a year ago, I started working out and ended up losing a bunch of weight. I used to have a big tummy but I started doing sit-ups and crunches all the time so my stomach got less flabby... except in the wrong way. I developed this gut thing that wouldn't go away.
At first I thought it was fat so I started doing more sit ups but that didn’t help it disappear; my abs just started getting more toned.
Then my friend told me it was because I wasn't sucking my stomach in while doing crunches and sit-ups. Well, I've been doing crunches while sucking it in but the gut is still not going away.
So is there any way this process is reversible or am I going to be stuck with it forever unless I stop toning my stomach and start all over again and remember to suck it in?
Or is it there because of something totally different? I want a toned stomach for this summer and this thing is a pretty big obstacle.
Thank you.

You can't target burn fat by doing crunches. Crunches will give you a good muscular foundation, but won't do anything for the fat on top. This means that you could have amazing abs, but not see any definition.

Try adding more cardio to your routine. Make sure you're working all of your muscle groups, not just abs.

Good luck!

Q: How come people write double 'and' symbols? And why? example: peaches && cream. What's with the '&&' ??

thanks. I know this must sound stupid!

It's a programming thing. && means and, || means or, == means "is equal to".

Either that or they're trying to be cool.

bio

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.