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Q: 15/f
I'm on the slim4life diet and have been for about a month. I keep cheating. It's making the weight loss slow down. I don't tell anyone I do but I am and I feel like I can't help it. Iv'e gotten a little better on self control but it's hard not to cheat. especally being a teenager and all my friends eat food like I want but can't have. I'm really trying my hardest not to cheat. Anyone have tips to stop eating off plan foods?

As said before, this might not be the right diet for you.

I did the South Beach diet and dropped a ton of weight. It was easy for me, because I could eat just about everything I like, except for bread, pasta, or cereal. You can find sugar-free versions of a ton of candies and other sweet stuff. I could even eat fast food; I just ordered a hamburger without the bun and a side salad.

All it takes is finding a diet that allows you to eat relatively normally. That way, when you 'cheat', it's not so bad.

Just so you know, a great low-cal snack is homemade popsicles made from Crystal Light or Kool-Aid made with Splenda. They're one of my favourites... I actually like them more than ice cream now!

Q: So I'm out of school for the summer. I'm trying to find things to do to keep myself busy so I'm not just sitting around the house all the time. I'm on a limited budget, so it's not like I have money to spend on an amazing vacation or anything. The only thing I have planned this summer is a week-long camping trip, but that might not even happen because the friend I was going to go with probably won't be able to get off work. I don't really have a lot of friends to hang out with either. And I don't like swimming.

Any suggestions on things I could do this summer to keep myself busy?

My interests are writing, roller blading, reading, video games, etc. if that helps. I just want to find something to do that will help me get out of the house!

I know this really isn't that fun sounding, but how about a job? Or, failing that, volunteer work? If you work, you'll enjoy the time you have off more because you'll appreciate it and you'll have money. If you volunteer, find something you'll enjoy, and not only will you be keeping yourself occupied, you'll be helping others.

Something I did one summer is to go online and find a list of 100 books everyone should read. Then I tackled it.

Hope that helps a little.

Q: I am going in to computer programming as my career. I am also getting a laptop but I am not sure what to get as I need to be able to expand my horizon in order to program. I really dont want Vista b/c everyone I have talked to says it sucks. Please dont refer me to websites as I have already tried many of them. I need to now specifics on what type of notebook to get and please dont answer if you do not know what you are talking about. Thank you.
*Keosha*

What I would suggest, if you don't need your computer right away, is to wait until the boxing day sales in December. That's when I got mine, and it was really inexpensive.

Don't spend a ton on a really expensive laptop. If you're programming, you really don't need anything complicated.

If you're interested in programs to get, try Microsoft Visual Studio. It does Visual Basic (which is really important) and C++. If you're looking at C, anything will do; you can program in Notepad, and download a compiler.

Q: do condoms work in water?

You should never have sex in water, due to the risk of infection.

Water can get forced up inside of you, and get into your abdominal cavity. It's really not good for you.

Also, being in water will cause any natural lubrication to dry up, which makes it very uncomfortable.

Q: Today I was talking to my best friend, and she asked me about joining the air force reserve with her. It seems like it would be a good thing to join, especially for college since I don't have the money for it anyways, & plus the benefits seem really good. The only thing I'm really worried about is getting sent to Iraq.. another of my friend's brother joined the army,& they said he was going, but he might not have to go now because of this bill. Its something about they're going to stop sending people over there after March of 2008. So my questions are..

What is the chance I'll be sent over to Iraq?
Is that bill really in effect?
What are some of the things I'll be expected to do?

Thanks a lot!!

Joining the reserves (at least in Canada) is very different from joining the actual military.

It's a great way of making extra money. My boyfriend is in the reserves, and he's making about 600 a month just doing every other weekend. It allows you to continue studying while you work. I don't know about there, but here they also give you a bursary towards school.

As for being sent to Iraq, you wouldn't necessarily. My boyfriend was asked if he wanted to go to Afghanistan just a little while ago. As a member of the reserves, you can't be just shipped off... you're only part-time. They have to ask, and you have to accept. The purpose of the reserves is to have people trained in case of emergency. So, before calling a draft, they'd call you guys.

What would you do there? I don't know how similar they are, but in the Canadian reserves, it's not too bad. My boyfriend has to do weekend training sessions every other weekend, where he does classroom work and parade stuff and strengthening exercises. Once a week there are parade nights, but he only has to go to those once a month. Then there's summer training, which lasts all summer (June - September) so you have a summer job, too!

If you have any other questions, let me know, and I'll ask my boyfriend.

Q: so recently i posted a question about industrial piercings.

now that im scared senseless of the pain im fixin to endure, im gettin it done tomorrow =0

if i were to take some advil or some kind of pain killer, would that help me to not feel it as much when its pierced or make it less sore?

any last minute advice?

thanks!

You can actually buy a topical anesthetic at the drugstore. My friend used it when she got her ears pierced. It's a patch, and you put it on for an hour before you get it done, and it numbs the area.

Sorry that I can't remember the name... it was a long time ago.

Q: can anyone tell me 5 similarities between "A Midsummer Night's Dream" and "Romeo & Juliet"?

i've looked everywhere & can't find any. i don't have time to read both plays. i've already read "A Midsummer Night's Dream" though.

thank you so much!

What you've asked us to do here is unethical.

You don't have time to read both plays? Well, what makes you think we have time to do your homework?!

That said, in the future try looking for summary notes online. They usually contain major plot points.

Or, try this website.

http://www.gradesaver.com/classicnotes/titles/midsummernight/about.html

Very simple, believe it or not. I just googled "midsummer night+romeo and juliet+similarities"

Definitely something you could do yourself, regardless of time constrictions.

Q: i am a female, around 185 lbs. and about 5'4
what should my "average" weight be?
or the normal.
is 110 too little?
oh and any good tips to help me get to my goal.
thank you!
much love

Well, it all depends on your habits.

I used to weigh about the same at the same height when I was a teen... but I trained at least 3 nights a week for several hours at my karate club in addition to walking twice a day and lifting weights.

Remember that the BMI isn't always the right way to go... because if it was, then I was an obese size 10 black belt with 4-pack abs!

Everyone is different. Go by how you look, not what you weigh. If you weigh a little more than you ideally would want to, but you look good, I wouldn't worry about it.

To get to your goal? Eat healthy, snack in moderation, and exercise. Whatever exercise you can do, do it. I'm severely asthmatic, and I managed to do it, so find something you like and get active!

Q: I'm a teenage girl who is about 20 pounds overweight (5'2 1/4" and 154 lbs) and I always wear one pieces but I'm going to a resort in a few days and I would really like to try wearing a bikini because I feel liek I actually look better in one because it shows off these feminine curves that I have better.

Do you think people would stare at me because I'm not thin? (i do have the hourglass body type) When I sit down my stomach sort of has these rolls and it hangs over my waist... So that makes me uncomfortable...

I just don't know what to do. I don't want to be gawked at...

Also- what kind/color of a bikini should I get that will make me look thinner?

thanks

Sounds like you're about the same build I am (only I'm taller).

I love wearing bikinis, even though I don't look like a supermodel.

You've got to be really careful if you're a busty girl like me. For tops, look for halters with thick straps that tie up. Not the tiny string ones, because those don't give the girls enough support.

As for bottoms, try to avoid the ones that look like shorts. And don't do skirts, or you'll look like you've got something to hide. If you've got a little roll, wear one that comes up a little higher; none of these low-cut ones are really flattering that way.

Q: 17/f. I love to read. I read almost anything really. But right now I'm in to reading the classics(my favorites: Saligner, Bradbury, Steinbeck, Orwell etc.) I just need more titles. Anything under the category 'classics' would be helpful. And also a quick summary-type on what the book is about would be very helpful. Thanks!!!

Here are a couple of my favourite classics...

Tess of the D'Urbervilles by Thomas Hardy
- About a country girl whose family finds out that they are from a good family, and when they try to get involved with the family, her life goes horribly wrong.

Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte
- An orphan is sent to a charitable school, and eventually becomes a governess. She falls in love with her employer.

Q: me and my man live together and have for like a year and a half now. I was recently looking for a picture in his folder on the computer (with permission of course) and i looked in a folder marked "random" cuz i couldnt find it. Well, in that folder was porn. Tons of it. movies, pictures, sound files ... now none of it was like kid porn (cuz that is sick) but it kind of makes me uncomfortable. What should I do?

The same thing happened to me a while ago.

Personally, I just talked to him about it. About why he watches it, what he likes about it. I let him know that I was comfortable with his porn watching, and that he should be too. I told him that if he wanted to share it with me, I didn't mind him sharing that part of his sexuality.

It's not a really big deal. That is, unless it starts interfering with your sex life.

Q: This is going to sound stupid,
but I'm 16/f I've never had a boyfriend yet,
never been kissed.

Its pathetic right?

I'm one of those people who crave a relationship, to be loved and to love.

All the guys I meet seem to just be 'good friends' and a lot of them actually, have feelings for my best girl friends.

I usually can solve or potentionally solve all my problems with answers from myself or others.

But I dont know why I cant find a boyfriend,
I have a lot of guy friends, but none seem to be interested in that way.

I dont even know how to attract them anymore,
I'm just so confused. And I'm lonely.
I know I'm young, but can any of you relate, and if so, what happened so far?

I just feel like something is wrong with me.

I feel your pain. When I was in high school, I worked, I volunteered, I was doing really well in school and I got my black belt in karate. Yet no guy would date me. I had tons of guy friends... but no boyfriends. I even made up a name for it... Platonic Friend Disorder.

Don't worry about it. Trust me on this; in university, all of a sudden I had guys mobbing me. The confidence and intelligence which scared off the guys in high school was like an aphrodisiac.

For now, I'd suggest that you just focus on relationships with your friends and family. There's plenty of time for dating when you're older.

Q: well...how far is ashland, kentucky to paducah, kentucky? and .. if u were going basically the speed limit of each town on the way there from paducah to ashland, how long would it take?

In the future, try Mapquest.

Here's the link for what you need.

http://www.mapquest.com/directions/main.adp?go=1&do=nw&rmm=1&1gi=0&un=m&1da=-1.000000&1rc=A5XAX&cl=EN&qq=1ADqpk24ofC1yl8JIXxwvBL6PurHmFtG5%252fzm9XD%252bdjAfjRRt6lt%252fzA8rUy%252bGnsLnkfSn6vOwPi4e%252bHE5x3I4ehLTFVIfr6sPm41FazGUOhQ%253d&ct=NA&r=f&1si=gaz&rsres=1&1y=US&1ffi=&1l=ib%252bmZ78%252bRUzck%252fod0GqzMw%253d%253d&1g=qHxKE9CY3aDbQ2ntfQnksg%253d%253d&1pl=&1v=CITY&1n=Boyd+County&1pn=&1a=&1c=Ashland&1s=KY&1z=&2y=US&2ffi=&2l=&2g=&2pl=&2v=&2n=&2pn=&2a=&2c=Paducah&2s=KY&2z=&panelbtn=2

Q: Ok.. where to start. This could relate to a lot of categories so please just bare with me.

I'm in a bit of a situation. I'm 19 years old, female. I have a boyfriend of two years. He's nearly 21 and I live with my grandparents.

First of all my grandmother is extremely strict on me. Curfews and things like that stopped when I turned 18 last year. Curfews aren't the problem though.

I have been with my boyfriend for two years as I said and she wont let me sleep with him. I have been sleeping with him for the last 12 months. He was my first and is the only guy I have ever been with sexually. I did everything right. I am on the pill and we always use protection.

Recently I had enough of her ways and told her how I felt and told her that I have been sleeping with my boyfriend. She completly hit the roof and went off at me and called me a slut.

I honestly don't think I deserved to be spoken to like that. I have spoken to my Aunty a number of times about this so she knows of everything that had been going on between my boyfriend and myself.

I have tried to speak to my grandmother about this and the last time ended up in tears like every other time. She even told me to pack my f*cking bags and leave if I wasn't happy.

The problem is that I don't do anything wrong and she still seems to think I need all these strict rules. I don't. Just because I can think and do things for myself doesn't mean I don't need her anymore. I told her this.

I asked her what do I do that is so wrong.. She couldn't give me an answer. She's only hurting herself because she is pushing me away.

I did well in school, I use to work for a lawyer now I work for a doctor. I don't drink alcohol except for christmas and things like that. I don't go to the pubs every weekend like most 19 year old girls do.

My boyfriend and I love each other very much and just want to be together. We shouldn't have anyone stand in the way of that. We have in the last few months decided that we want to live together and start our life together. We are good people so why does this happen?

What is she protecting me from?!? She tells me that she loves my boyfriend and he is a lovely person. I can't win. I am on the verge of just moving out. I don't know how to deal with the stress anymore. It hurts.

Am I just being selfish or is she just too over protective? I don't want to feel miserbale anymore!

Thank you for taking the time to read this.

I'm 19 too... and I know what it's like! My boyfriend and I are talking engagement, and my parents still have us sleeping in separate rooms when we visit.

As Elcee said, your grandmother grew up under different conditions. It's kind of hard for older people to understand the social context that people our age have grown up in.

However, your grandmother does have a say in your life because you're living under her roof. So if she doesn't want you having sex in her house, then you can't.

I'd say that you should just adopt a "don't ask, don't tell" policy. What she doesn't know in this respect won't kill her.

Q: what if someone had there pms for 2 months straight very heavy flow?I know someone dear to me that has this condition and i want to know whats wrong?What ilness is this and whats its cure?She has high blood pressure and sometimes shortness of breath.

This happened to one of my friends. She should go to the doctor immediately (even if it's a little embarassing).

They'll probably get her on iron supplements and birth control (to regulate her period).

Q: on facebook and ur friends list, what are the mutual friends? i have no idea what they are, and how to be one

Mutual friends are the friends who you share with someone else.

So, say you're friends with Bob. Bob is friends with Joe. You're also friends with Joe. Joe is a mutual friend of you and Bob.

Q: is there anything you can add to water to flavor it more with out that many calories? oh and that isnt pure sugar?

dont sugest vitamin water cause i used to drink it all the time and i figured out some facts about it, its as bad as drinking soda =/ !!

thank you! cause im going on a all water drink diet for my health, but water getting boreing and not flavorble after a while =]
--ashley

I try to cut out sugar too... here's what I like.

Crystal Light is amazing. You can also make Kool-Aid, but with Splenda instead of sugar. Both of these make great homemade popsicles, too.

Q: ok im 19 and i have been with my man for like, a year and a half. the guy hasn't had sex in almost 2 years and i am still a virgin. he knows and respects that. But recently he has become sexually frustrated b/c we live together and he says it feels like we are already married with out any of ther perks ... meaning sex. im scared and i want to sleep with him i really do, but im afraid of the pain. he told me there are only two options for this situation. 1: I allow him to go and strictly have sex with another woman, just to get rid of the frustration (but he said he doesnt want that cuz he knows it will hurt me) or 2: for me to get over my fear and go through with it.

well, it all boils down to im afraid of both options, and well, i don't face fears very well. what should i do? Any kind of advice is welcome please help me out.

Take the third option. Dump the @$$hole.

If he really loves you and cares about you, he should be able to wait. The ultimatum he provided was ridiculous... it doesn't take into account your feelings at all.

You can do better than that. Don't go against your personal beliefs just because he tells you that you have to.

Q: I'm unsure if I want to go to university or not. I do want to get a good job and everything and get a degree, but it's a long time to spend there if you're not really that into higher education. Plus it's seriously expensive and I don't want to move too far away from home.
I've thought about taking a gap year, working to get some money saved up and then either doing a part time Business Management course or something, but I'd be 20 by the time I decided to go. Arghh dunno what to do.
I know not going to uni isn't the end of the world, but I'm so confused!

If you don't want to do university, how about college?

Contrary to popular belief, colleges are not for 'stupid people'. They're actually better in that they give you more hands-on knowledge and they usually have smaller class sizes.

I started my education at a university, and really didn't like it. I didn't do well at all. I switched into a degree program at a college, and I'm loving it. Tuition is lower, the classes are more fun, and I'm learning more practical stuff.

It's definitely something to consider. As for not going to a higher education facility at all, I don't recommend it. That'll land you in a non-skilled labour field, and that's not really fulfilling.

Q: I'm taking English with the most annoying people on earth. They frustrate me to death, and I strongly believe that some of their oppinions that come through our class-disscussions are wrong. My teacher on the other hand agrees with them and says I need to realize that my way of seeing things is..well, a minority. And that the majority of people would agree with my class. So, I need to find out what YOU guys think, honestly, don't agree with me for a high rating, dont disagree to piss me off, just give me YOUR HONEST OPINION PLEASE.

Because I don't want anyone to agree with me for the sake of a high rating, I wont tell you what my opinion was, I'll simply ask for yours, that's fair right? So.. my teacher said "I think that a society like ours that makes economy such a high priority in the end looses it's humanism" and then let us discuss this quote. What are your opinions about this? Do you agree? Or can you find examples that show that that's not quite true?

Thank you!

Economy is important. However, I think it's an essential indicator of humanism.

It's a natural drive of humans to succeed, right? So, although this is a more non-traditional way of competing than, say, hunting, it's still competition. By having more than someone else, you are better (not that it's true, but it's a common view).

Now, I can see where your teacher is coming from. If you're looking at compassion, yes, we're losing that. People with more are less likely to give it up to people who need more. Compassion isn't a natural human response, though. It's far more complex than our primal urges, and more a product of society than of our selves.

I had the same problem all through high school. I usually have conflicting views with most others, because I see some weird sides of arguments. Just keep fighting... as long as you can argue your point well, it's a ton of fun!

Have you ever considered joining a debate club?

bio

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.