I can definitely sympathize with your feelings. I'm 22 years old, and getting married next August. I've been engaged for 2 years now, with him for 3.

It is totally normal to feel what you're feeling. Have you heard of the "honeymoon phase"? It's when you're still crazy in love with each other, and nothing will ever tear you apart. You overlook any flaws they might have, and they overlook yours. You compromise without a second thought. Neither of you can do any wrong with the other.

Then, inevitably, it ends.

Not to say that you won't love someone for years and years, but you just can't keep that level of insanity up for long. Then comes the part of the relationship where you actually have to work at it!

You've probably started to notice all his annoying habits. He's noticing yours. You're likely starting to bicker over things you've never argued over before. He's not that god of romance anymore; he's a guy who clips his toenails on the couch while you're watching tv.

Sounds terrible, right? But it's not. This is when you two come to terms with each other, good bad and ugly. It's easy to love someone when they're perfect. Real love is when you can deal with their imperfections. If you can, at the end of the day, get over your annoyance and still love him, that is a good sign. I know it feels like your love is fading, but after a while of adjusting, your feelings will start to get deeper and stronger.

To keep things going strong, make sure that you don't get too comfortable. It's easy to let things slide. Try to make time to go out for a nice dinner once a month or so. Take dance lessons. Go for a picnic. It's okay to wear sweatpants every once in a while. Every day? Not so much. Keep looking nice, and get on his case if he isn't. My guy went through a phase where he wouldn't put on clothes unless he was going out. He'd wander around in boxers, unshaven, unless he was going to be seen by someone else. That is too comfortable.

Bottom line: don't worry. Just keep soldiering on, and every time he annoys you, think of something you love about him.

I had the exact same problem. I still don't like going to theme parks because of it!

One option that many parks offer is a "grounds admission". It costs way less than a regular admission, and gets you into the park, just you can't go on rides.

Unfortunately, people who don't have a phobia don't understand people who do. However, if there is something your mom is terrified of, try comparing roller coasters to that... for example, riding a roller coaster for you is like sitting in a bathtub full of spiders for her (if she happens to hate spiders).

When you're on Depo, you won't get any periods. A very handy side effect!

In my experience, you may have some spotting around the time of your usual period, but otherwise nothing really heavy.

-----------------------------------------------

Depo is very different from other birth control products. It will cause you to stop having periods entirely, unlike the pill, which either lightens or makes them less frequent.

Just be sure to take a pregnancy test every once in a blue moon to be sure... nothing is entirely failsafe.

The best way to avoid an unwanted pregnancy is to use two methods of birth control.

You should see your doctor and talk to them about the various types of contraceptives to find out which one is best for you.

Personally, I have used Depo Provera (the injection) in combination with condoms to be doubly safe.

Ether was used to explain how light can travel through space. There were arguments as to how a wave could travel without a substance to travel in, so someone came up with the theory of ether. They basically thought that all the planets and stars were supsended in ether. That argument went to pot when they realized that moving through a substance at the speed we do should cause really fast wind.

Science lesson aside, basically, it means that the universe changed.

It sucks being the younger sibling, doesn't it?

You don't get the same privileges as your sister simply because you are younger. I know it's no fun watching her get to do things that you're not allowed to, but you are younger. If you had a 13 year old sister, should she have the same privileges that you do? Definitely not!

I had way more privileges at 17 than I did at 15. As you get older, things will change. Till then, follow the rules as best you can and they'll be more likely to be more lenient with you in the future.

I was the same way until recently, so I totally understand where you're coming from. I'm considered to be obese right now, but I'm on a gradual healthy weight loss plan.

This may sound harsh, but it's the wakeup call that I needed to get going.

You have to take responsibility for yourself. I agree; you need to tell everyone to go pee up a rope. You need to want this for you. And you do, from the sounds of it. You've been hiding behind this excuse (yes, that's what it is).

Have you ever heard of the term "cut off your nose to spite your face"? That's what you're doing. You refuse to lose weight because that's what THEY want. Ignore what they want. It's your self-loathing that you need to overcome. It's your insecurity; not theirs! Even if they did cause that insecurity, you won't get over it by eating a bowl of ice cream. You'll get over it by knowing that you're taking action to overcome it.

Not to sound overly nasty, but there IS something wrong with you and me. We are overweight. You may be a healthy overweight right now. I am; I'm the same age as you, and I've never had any problems with blood pressure, diabetes or any other weight-related things. Thing is, we're young. It may not affect you now, but when you are 30, 40, or 50, it will catch up with you. So you do need to lose weight for your health. Your future health.

The solution:

Try aiming not for losing weight, but for having a healthier lifestyle. Watch what you eat and get some exercise. Aiming for healthiness is better than aiming for a certain clothing size.

Share your goals with those around you. Chances are they'll be very supportive of you. Maybe some of your friends will have similar goals.

Something I've found very useful is www.myfitnesspal.com. I'm using it to track my calorie intake and my exercise. It really spurs me to take responsibility for my choices.

Not loving your weight is not equivalent to not loving yourself. How many women are there who hate their love handles, but love themselves? Your weight is not you; your choice of actions from now on is.

Actually, neither of them is an STI.

AIDS, or Auto-Immune Deficiency Syndrome is a condition that comes from HIV, or Human Immunodeficiency Virus, which is an STI. AIDS itself isn't an STI, but it is caused by one.

UTIs are simply infections of the urinary tract. It's like when you get a throat or ear infection. You can get it from having sex and irritating your urinary tract, or you can get it from getting soap in there, or from any other number of reasons.

You could definitely be pregnant.

When used correctly (with no mishaps) condoms are effective at preventing pregnancy 98% of the time. So 2/100 women who have sex using a condom will end up pregnant, on average.

With a mishap, it's just like the odds of getting pregnant without using a condom.

If you had sex today, you can take Plan B. It's most effective when taken very soon after the mishap. This is exactly the sort of situation it's made for! I don't know the specifics for everywhere, but here in Canada you can get it over the counter.

In the future, you may want to consider doubling up your birth control. Taking the pill, or using another chemical contraceptive as well as using condoms will greatly decrease your odds of becoming pregnant if something like this happens again.

To avoid condom breakage, make sure you're not using expired ones, and don't store them in extreme heat or cold. If it's been kept in a wallet, throw it away!

I'm deathly allergic to cats too, and I had to go through this in a home I moved into.

Steam clean everything you can. If you don't own one, rent a steam cleaner. There are special pet allergen solutions that you can get to put in the machine.

Get your ducts cleaned, and try to air out the house as much as possible.

Unfortunately, cat allergen is one of the most enduring, so you may have some issues for quite a while. See if you can go on a daily prescription medication (like Singulair).

Probably the biggest thing that my friends told me about (I've never smoked before) is that you regain your sense of smell and taste pretty quickly. I had a friend who just couldn't stop eating after she quit, because everything tasted so good!

Your lungs will also start to feel better(although I guess that's a given). No more nasty hacking cough. You'll be able to breathe easier, and your endurance for physical activity will increase.

The huge energy increase is definitely from quitting. The carbon monoxide in cigarettes keeps your blood from carrying oxygen. It's also a psychological thing. Not "needing" that smoke really is liberating.

Congratulations!

For a long time, the fetus doesn't even have fully developed lungs!

Fetuses get their oxygen through the placenta and umbilical cord from their mother's blood. That's how they get all their nutrients until they are born.

That's why it's so important for pregnant women to be careful with their health. Anything you take in, your fetus gets too.

Do you have wireless internet in your home? If you do, then you don't need anything to connect your Wii. You just go into settings, and follow the steps for setting up a connection.

If you don't have wireless in your home, you can buy a wireless router really inexpensively at any electronics store. I've seen them as low as $20. You don't need a professional to install it; it's really easy!

http://www.microsoft.com/windowsxp/using/networking/setup/wireless.mspx

Norton and Avast never worked for me. I've been using AVG Free for the last little while, and no more issues!

http://free.avg.com/

Some great mattress cleaning techniques:

1) Salt and a little water: use regular table salt and mix it with just enough water to make it clumpy. Rub it with your fingers in a circular motion on the mattress. This is a great first step to try, just because most people have a box of salt kicking around.

2) Oxi-Clean is my favourite cleaning thing in the world. There's a reason why Billy Mays is always so enthusiastic! The spray should get rid of the stain right away.

Labour laws vary depending on what country and state/province you live in. I'm taking a stab at it and guessing you're Canadian, based on your travel destination.

In Ontario, the law states that you must either receive 4% in vacation pay OR get a minimum of 2 weeks off in a 12 month period. If you have given reasonable notice and have not taken your vacation this year, then they don't have a legal leg to stand on if they fire you.

http://www.labour.gov.on.ca/english/es/guide/guide_7.html

Your mom is more than entitled to have male friends. Just because someone gets married doesn't mean that they have to stop being friends with people of the opposite sex! It is both normal and healthy for both married partners to have friendships outside of their relationship. The sex of those friends doesn't matter.

For instance, I'm nearly married. I'm friends with mostly men, due to the nature of my major. Does that mean that when I get married I have to give up all my close friends? I'm also very close friends with my first love still, and my fiance has no problem with me hanging out with him.

Your mom is not having an affair; that much is pretty clear. Your father trusts her, and you should too. If your father was worried, or if she was sneaking around, then there might be cause for alarm.

Your mother is happier because she has a close friend, just as I'm sure your best friends make you happy. My best friend is my fiance, but both of us need relationships outside of ours to stay sane.

Most of my guy friends like a happy medium. I may be a little older than you, though (early 20s)

They're not fans of the "I woke up, did my hair and makeup and then threw on these enormous sweatpants" look. It's kind of fake. Like, you'll put in an hour of work on your hair, but you can't take 3 minutes to find pants?

However, they do like a girl who isn't always dressed to the nines. Dress it down a little with jeans and a t-shirt, but maintain your class. Keep your makeup to a minimum, and your hair low-maintenance.

Sweatpants and athletic shorts are meant for the gym, or for when you're at home, out of sight. In public, always wear real pants. Please!

Based on the fact that he's fully capable of achieving an erection otherwise, I'd say that your guy has performance anxiety!

Somewhere, deep down in his subconscious, he's worried about performing. Worried that you won't like it, that he won't be able to please you properly, could be any number of insecurities.

Try going from fooling around to having sex. Let it happen naturally, rather than fully intending to have sex at that time. Pretend that you aren't going to have sex. Then, when he's hard, BAM!

:)

You're definitely headed to the west coast.

My suggestion: Vancouver Island. Victoria is a great city! It's close enough to Vancouver that you can ferry there, but not nearly as expensive as actually living there.

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.

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