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I feel like I can't lose weight because...
21/f 5'5"
I have battled with my weight all my life. As a child, I was chubby and was bullied by my peers. In my early teen years, I suffered from an eating disorder, lost a lot of weight, and was very thin.
I started gaining weight at 16 and by the time I was 18, I was considered obese. At 19, I got down to 172 lbs (no longer obese, but still overweight) but then I gained it back. Now I'm just over 200 pounds, and I find that I am no longer able to lose weight.
I feel very bitter toward society, everyone who ever hurt me, and even myself. I feel like if I lose weight, I'm letting them win because "they" told me there was something wrong with me, so the only way to win is to love myself the way I am and say screw them. I feel like maybe I even sabotage my own attempts to lose weight.
I have suffered no health consequences due to my weight. I am in relatively good health. I wish I could say I wanted to lose weight for my health, but it isn't true. Under it all, my desire to lose weight is truly fueled by the same insecurity and self loathing that I had as a young teen.
How can I change this? What should I do?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
Well, losing weight is not an immediate process. It takes some time. You should start exercising on a daily basis and eat healthier. Not eating anything to lose weight is not going to get you anywhere but the hospital. You can eat and lose weight but you have to eat right. Fruits and vegetables are a better approach to losing weight. Daily exercises is a big challenge but the results at the end are amazing. Commitments are very important in living a healthier lifestyle. Exercise, eat healthier would be my suggestions for you. Hope that answers your question.
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I was the same way until recently, so I totally understand where you're coming from. I'm considered to be obese right now, but I'm on a gradual healthy weight loss plan.
This may sound harsh, but it's the wakeup call that I needed to get going.
You have to take responsibility for yourself. I agree; you need to tell everyone to go pee up a rope. You need to want this for you. And you do, from the sounds of it. You've been hiding behind this excuse (yes, that's what it is).
Have you ever heard of the term "cut off your nose to spite your face"? That's what you're doing. You refuse to lose weight because that's what THEY want. Ignore what they want. It's your self-loathing that you need to overcome. It's your insecurity; not theirs! Even if they did cause that insecurity, you won't get over it by eating a bowl of ice cream. You'll get over it by knowing that you're taking action to overcome it.
Not to sound overly nasty, but there IS something wrong with you and me. We are overweight. You may be a healthy overweight right now. I am; I'm the same age as you, and I've never had any problems with blood pressure, diabetes or any other weight-related things. Thing is, we're young. It may not affect you now, but when you are 30, 40, or 50, it will catch up with you. So you do need to lose weight for your health. Your future health.
The solution:
Try aiming not for losing weight, but for having a healthier lifestyle. Watch what you eat and get some exercise. Aiming for healthiness is better than aiming for a certain clothing size.
Share your goals with those around you. Chances are they'll be very supportive of you. Maybe some of your friends will have similar goals.
Something I've found very useful is www.myfitnesspal.com. I'm using it to track my calorie intake and my exercise. It really spurs me to take responsibility for my choices.
Not loving your weight is not equivalent to not loving yourself. How many women are there who hate their love handles, but love themselves? Your weight is not you; your choice of actions from now on is.
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Every person in the world has insecurities. Yours just happens to be your weight. Countless women have tried diets to no avail. I think that you need to concentrate on your depression and insecurities about your weight first. See your doc and tell him how you are feeling, have him run some thyroid tests also. Sometimes that can affect weight. I think that if you get your depression under control then you will feel better about yourself and be taking the first steps to healing yourself.
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