ok usually my perios is about 4 or 5 days long .. but last week i got it on wednesday (the 20th) and its still here! heavy as it was when i first got it.. i just want to know.. is this normal? also last month wasnt heavy.. like at all.. i rate high
thank u so much!! ♥
Yeah, that's normal, especially if you're withing the first 2-3 years of getting your period. It takes a while to regulate the cycle, and it can be light one month, heavy the next, even skip a month or two in between. However, if yours is accompanied by heavy cramps, headaches, or pain in your legs, and won't go away with regular pain medication or exercise, and it prevents you from going about your everyday life, talk to your parents or your doctor. Some people have irregular cycles that won't regulate themselves naturally, and a doctor will usually perscribe birth control pills every 3-4 months to help regulate it. Hope this helps!
Nevaeh
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How does anorexia harm you or your body? I know pukeing will stain your teeth but what else?? cuz if thats it, then whats the harm right?
First, anorexia isn't puking up what you eat, that's bulimia. Anorexia is to completely stop eating, or eat severely under the amount of calories that your body needs to survive. Anorexia is deadly. When your body doesn't get the calories or carbohydrates it needs to give your body an energy source to metabolize, your body starts to eat itself. You might burn fat at first, but it starts to eat away at your heart, lungs, muscle, and every other major body part. You lose bone mass, an it puts severe strain on your heart, which will cause it to fail. An anorexic girl in my freshman biology class a few years ago literally couldn't sit down because her leg bones would break. There was nothing there to cushion them, any muscle, fat, and bone mass had been completely depleted. Anorexia isn't only a physical problem, it is a psychological condition, and if you suspect that you or anyone else you know might have it, don't hesitate to tell someone you trust /immediately./
Bulimia is also deadly. Besides runing your metabolism, self-esteem, and staining your teeth, it will kill you. When you throw up, the acid from your stomach eats away at the lining of your esophogas, and if you do it often (as is the case with bulimia) it will burn holes through it. (Btw, your esophogas is the tube that carries food from your mouth to your stomach.) Bulimia can cause ulcers (internal bleeding from holes in the lining of your stomach), hernias (The protrusion of an organ or other bodily structure through the wall that normally contains it; a rupture), and you can suffocate because when you throw up the food can get into your lungs. Like anorexia, it places extreme strain on your heart and will lead to heart failure and death.
If you're trying to lose weight, exercise and eat a well-balanced diet, it's not worth dying over. If you think you might have an eating disorder, or are obsessing over what you eat, talk to your doctor or your parents. They'll know how to help you get a healthy lifestyle.
Also remember that bulimia and anorexia affect 1 in every 12 girls from their teen years to their early twenties. Most, if not all of these cases spring from a psychological misconception of body image. In 99.9999% of all cases with eating disorders, the girls are at the right weight for their bodies or are even very underweight, but that's not how they see themselves. If you think you have a problem with any of this, talk to someone right away.
Hope this helps!
Love,
Nevaeh
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My brother is forced to move to Hawaii on tuesday for 3 years cause of military orders. he isn't able to take the dog with him because of the rabie policy in Hawaii and the money issue of getting the dog tested(my parents won't let my brother borrow money.). He asked everyone he knew to take care of the dog but they all said no. I wanted to take care of the dog but my parents told me and my brother that they hate animals and that I won't be able to concentrate in school and that school is my top priority. I've tried talking to my parents about it but they always get pissed off and yell at me. So my brother has no choice but to send him to the animal shelter. How can I persuade my parents to let me keep the dog?
Have you considered trying to raise the money to get the dog tested? I'm sure a lot of people, like friends and other family members, would contribute, and you and your brother could do a car wash or something to raise the money. I know that there's not a whole lot of time before Tuesday, but there's more time to raise money than to convince your parents. Plus, if you show them the extent to which you're willing to go to keep this dog, or at least to find a way so that your brother can take him with, they might just see that you're responsible enough to handle schoolwork and a dog. Be creative, appeal to friends and neighbors for help, and see what you can do. I hope it works out for you!
Love,
Nevaeh
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f/14
so the guy i like, likes someone else. he asks me advice like how to ask her out and stuff like that. he obiously doesn't realize i like him. so yep, he likes this girl( who has bigger boobs than me and is probably 8 pound lighter than me, but diefidentally not as pretty)
how do i get him to forget about her and focus on me. in other owrds how do i get him to like me?
i rate hight!
First, I don't think that this guy likes the girl because she has bigger boobs or weighs less than you do, and he's not going to like you just based on the fact that you're pretty. If he truly likes this girl, and he's interested in her rather than her looks, then you're not going to easily deterr him from her. However, if he doesn't really know her or doesn't share some interests, it's probably just a crush, and you can wait for it to blow over. Then you can show him that you're interested in him and that you want to get to know the real him, and if he likes you back, that's great, but if not, then it wasn't meant to be. If he's asking you for advice, I'd guess that he really values you as a friend that he can trust.
I was on the other end of this situation not too long ago. I was completely head over heels for one of my friends (we'll call him John), and, as I didn't know at the time, John's best friend, (Jake), also a friend of mine liked me. So I went to Jake for advice on how to get John, not realizing that I probably hurt him. Eventually, he asked me out, and even though I love him to death as a best friend, I had to say no because John was just 'that person' for me.
What I'm trying to say is that no matter what, you can't make a person like you if it won't work, and you can't stop a person liking someone else just by liking them. It may not be the best thing to come to terms with, but it's true. So wait it out, but don't try too hard to get this guy away from the girl he likes, or you could end up losing his trust and respect.
I hope it works out for you, and that this guy will see that you like him and (possibly) realize he likes you too.
Love,
Nevaeh
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My husband is the eldest, has three sisters. His mom is an only child, his father has several sibs. My husband and I both graduated college in four years, both work full-time, have been married 20 years, have two teenage children -- the only grandchildren -- and own a home and two breaking down vehicles. We consider ourselves middle class. We rarely go on vacation and when we do, it's usually to visit family and brief due to work and children's event scheduling. My husband's sisters have all graduated college eventually, taking 5 to 7 years, and have returned for schooling at various times, which their parents have always paid for. Two of them are married, only one of them works, the third works part-time and is getting married soon. All three of these girls continue to have mom and dad finance anything from vacations to dental work to their dog's surgery. We recently learned that my in-laws have been paying insurance, both medical and car, at various times for years for two of these adult women. When there is a plumbing problem, a car repair or a big vacation, these ladies have been going to mom and dad for financial support and receiving it.
When we have borrowed money, on two occasions in the past 20 years, we have offered to pay it back and been refused. But we never have asked for anything further and have not received anything further, either. We have had many emergencies that we could have used help with but figured it was our responsibility and not anyone else's -- we did not know that our "upper class" parents had been funding "the girls" in every little thing for years.
Recently talk has centered about their will and one of sis-in-laws was named the executor. This is fine, although a bit of a concern since she has financially never stood on her own two feet. We have been asked to name any property of theirs that we would like and I requested only one thing, a used but not antique nor family heirloom piano, and this is for my daughter who is quite the musician -- none of my sis-in-laws play any instruments nor do they have any children not even stepchildren. This one request was refused because one sister had already requested the piano. Obviously she must be planning to get a bigger house with her inheritance because there is no room in her current dwelling for anything that big.
Well, this has upset my husband to no end because he now is convinced that all those years we went on day trips and his sisters went on cruises and spent a lot of time on Caribbean islands that this was funded directly or indirectly (since they aren't responsible for themselves) by his parents. The parents have always made a big deal about having the same amount of presents under the tree for everyone, etc., but now are saying that their property will be divided four ways -- with nothing noted for their only grandchildren. This seems unfair to me on so many levels, especially in light that the sisters have long time been the recipients of uneven gifts of money and support for years, more than a decade after they had moved out of the house.
We are wondering what we did to deserve this. There has been no animosity, never any disagreements. I really wouldn't care except now my husband is very hurt and becoming a little paranoid about the fact that his sisters get their credit cards paid off by his parents while we paid ours off ourselves all these years even when it involved hospital bills for our children or other expenses.
Recently we discovered that one sis had complained to her parents about gifts they had given us ($25 checks) on our wedding anniversaries and for father's and mother's days and so now I guess mom is sending each of the girls something on those occasions to be equal. Yet we have always bought gifts for the parents on these occasions and the girls typically just send them cards only.
I don't want it to sound like I am being petty and greedy, but it does sort of come down to this. We thought we had a great relationship with my in-laws and now it feels like they have been favoring the girls over their son and will continue to do so. I doubt my husband wishes to consult an attorney or anything that might damage his relationship with his family, but he is very hurt and we don't know how to express this to his parents. They are in their 70s and both are very smart and active; we hope they live another 20 years!
There's a lot there, and I can't see a way to bring it up in a "family meeting' type setting without possibly causing a rift between your husband and his parents or his sisters. If I were in your situation, I would show them what you wrote on this site, or write a letter directly to them addressing the same concerns. However, I think it's better to give them what you wrote here, because it shows that it bothers you and your husband enough to ask others for help, and it shows that you're respectful enough of them to say, to their credit, that they have helped you in numerous ways, and are generally good people. On the note of the piano, has your husband brought up the point that his sister wouldn't use it at all, and, despite being wasteful, it's not good for the piano? Bring up the point that it would be used and loved if it were in your home, and would help their grandchildren as aspiring musicians. (I play the piano myself, and I don't think that a piano should just be for decoration ;) ). I hope that the will works in your favor, and that maybe your parents-in-law will see how unfair it is to spoil your husband's sisters and not grant his one simple request.
Love,
Nevaeh
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hey. well this might be confusing so i'll apologize now. in novemeber of last year my aunt got married. i hated my new uncle. i know, thats rude but its also true! i loved my aunts old boyfriend .. he was great! they were going out for 6 and a half years! he was so funny too but then they broke it off. then my aunt met this other guy who she is now married too. he's okay i guess but hes such a freak! he totally changed the relationship between me and my aunt. before they met eachother me and my aunt were best friends!!! now we cant even have a simple convorasation with out him standing there & making sure everythings appropriate.
heres a little about him:
- hes a Church freak ( i guess theres nothing wrong with that .. )
- we have to listen to religious music ( and since he wont let me listen to B96 or KissFm .. i asked if i could listen to country music and he said 'no!! if you want to listen to that sh*t .. get ur own ride!' )
- he wouldnt take me and my grandma to fannie may because he said 'Jesus didnt sacrafice his life so people could waste their money over the stupidest f*ckin things!'
- we have to pray before every meal.. even if were in public. this one time my sister started eating before we prayed and her punishment was she had to say the prayer , she couldnt eat her lunch ; and for the rest of the month she had to go to church 3 days a week.
- he treats me and my sister like were 3
- he wont get cable for the same reason he wont take us to fannie may
what should i do about it? i cant talk to my aunt about it because i know she'll get so mad. how can i learn to like him? please answer.. ill rate high for good answers!!
love,
I HATE HIM!!
Ah, the zealously, militantly religious people. Here's what I'd do: Start feeding him some of his own medicine. Tell him Jesus didn't sacrifice his life so that he could go around cursing. Tell him Jesus didn't care about how money was spent, he cared about how love was spent. Tell him that God's message is to spread love, not to keep his nieces as downtrodden as possible. Tell him that the world is full of things that might go against God, but you're not going to succumb to them, and you know what's right and wrong. Tell him that people make mistakes, and God's message is forgiveness for those who ask it, not automatic punishment or insincere piety. Start using his own (WAY overzealous) religion to show him what he's doing, and see if it doesn't get on his nerves. :)
~Nevaeh
P.S. If it doesn't work, come back on here and ask again, I'll be glad to offer other suggestions.
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which out of all of these broadway shows are the best and which one should i get tickets to??
-avenue Q
-hairspray
-wicked
I heard Hairspray's really good, but after consulting my theatre geek friend she said you should go get tickets to Wicked. She says "Now! Immediately! Tell her to go see Wicked NOW!" :) And she adds the side-note that Rent is amazing, it brings up a lot of social issues, but very dramatic and extremely well-acted. She says "Half of the characters are gay and the other half are transvestites, what's not to like?" ;) Hope this helps. (btw, Wicked's musical score is fantastic too, I have the soundtrack and I love it.)
~Nevaeh
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im a teenage girl who truly hates her parents to death. They've both cheated on each other, and not just once. They dont think or care about me or my careless little 9 year old brother. They have me in the middle hoping i'll pick or protect one of them, and they've said no matter who i pick, i'll still lose one of them and wont get to see them ever again, but their both literally whores. Worst thing is, i suffer from severe depression, and i cut myself, sometimes to much and sometimes to deep, i've taken 2 overdoses, but have ended up getting the pills pumped out, i might as well kill myself, but i've decided to go 2 my home country, the Dominican Republic, to do high school over there, i no i shouldn't be trying to escape my problems, but it's better than commiting suicide, wat else can i do? Can someone please help? I dont think im a freak, just misunderstood. Please write back
First, try not to harbor too much hate and resentment towards your parents. They're not bad people, but they've made some pretty bad and irresponsible choices in their lives, and probably don't know how to deal with the ramifications of the consequences themselves. Still, it doesn't sound like you or your nine-year-old brother should live with either of them, they're very irresponsible. If they ever physically or emotionally abuse you or your little brother, call Social Services /immediately/, they'll be able to get you out of that situation and living with either a relative or an adoptive family. One of my best friends was adopted because he was living with irresponsible adults, and his life has improved beyond measure.
Now, no matter how bad it is, and how hard it is to deal with reality, cutting yourself is definitely not going to make you feel better or help you solve anything, and neither is taking pills. I would suggest getting involved in activities you like to do, sports, or reading, or anything else you're interested in, to take your mind off of things. If you're on medication for the depression, I would stop taking it. It's been clinically proven to actually increase suicidal thoughts and depression, rather than helping anything. Remember that there are always people that you can talk to, and that will understand what you're going through, whether they're your friends, another family member like your grandparents, aunts and uncles, or cousins, or even the people on this site. They'll want to help.
I honestly think that going to the Dominican Republic to do high school is a good idea, if it means getting away from your parents until they can sort out their problems. Who would you be living with, or are you old enough to live on your own? Sometimes a change of setting can be a good thing, and you can leave a lot of problems and stress behind and kind of start over. It's not really running from your problems, as there's not much you can do stuck where you are.
Just try and cheer up, you've got a whole life ahead of you with glorious opportunities to pursue. Always remember that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Hope I've helped!
Love,
Nevaeh
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wat do u think about dating online?
I think it's a great way to meet new people, but you have to be careful. Don't give out too much personal information until you've seen the other person on a webcam or picture, or talked to them on the phone, (etc...). If you decide to meet, make sure it's in a public place, and have a friend discreetly hang out at the same place just in case you need to make an exit. Otherwise, people have formed wonderful relationships online, and talking is a great way to get to know another person's thoughts and know them emotionally before having a physical relationship.
Hope this helps :)
Nevaeh
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ok. im looking into starting a website. just like something for stuff about me, a place for people to leave comments, and all that kinda stuff. does anyone know where i can do that for free? thanks :)
Try tripod.com, they offer a decent free membership. Plus, your domain name won't be something hard to remember, it will just be something like yoursite.tripod.com. I use it, and I've never had a problem. If you have experience using html, you can do it on tripod, and if you have no experience, you can use flash and their blog builder. Hope this helps.
:) Nevaeh
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All my life-I was known as the "stick."
Now I'm gaining weight-and fast. I am on birth control and that could be one of the reasons-but I'm also not in as many sports as i once was.
I'm not fat-but I feel as if i am overweight. I am 5'9 and i weigh 130.
Psycologically-I want to stop eating. I eat something fattening-and then I decide not to eat for the rest of the day.
I can't shake this-and I really just want to lose weight. I run every day-but it soon ended-I just couldn't do it anymore. I have horrible back problems. I try and eat heathy-but i still feel fat.
Sorry.
Please help..
If you're 5'9 and weigh 130, you're even a little underweight compared to those BMI charts that doctors give out. But, it sounds like you might have a slight eating disorder, and eating disorders stem more from a psychological perception of one's self and one's life than just feeling fat. I would suggest talking to a parent, or maybe your doctor, about your feelings about eating. He/she can probably suggest a meal plan that would both make you healthy and lean, and probably suggest a counselor if you're still stressing about what you eat. If you don't feel like you're obsessing over it, or don't feel like it could be an eating disorder, I would just monitor carefully what you eat throughout the day; make sure it's a well-balanced diet, plenty of fruits and vegetables, and low on salt and sugar, which can make you feel lazy and lethargic. Fruits and veggies, on the other hand, make you feel energetic and happy. Celery is especially good for your metabolism, as well as broccoli.
Try not to feel like you're fat, I'm six inches shorter than you and weigh the same thing, and my doctor says that it's the weight I should be at.
Hope this helps!
Love,
Nevaeh
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I'm 15 and my sister is 14 and she cuts herself. I just found out like 45 mins ago bc she left me a comment on my xanga saying she has a career she was looking into but she didnt know how much it paid and she wouldnt tell me what it was so I figured that maybe she searched it up on the search bar. When I checked the search bar history I found a bunch of stuff about "I cut myself" and "I cut myself and a friend wants me to stop" and such. Then, since it's late at night and she usually is in the basement at night, I tried to sneak downstairs but she caught me.
Well she started casually talking to me and asking me why I was downstairs and I looked at her arms and saw they were bloody and I almost started crying but then I mentioned how I found the articles and started asking her about it and she just smiled goofily and I looked at her arms and saw all these scars I saw before but never thought of as cutting herself just from cats. And I said "why would you do something so stupid, whos your friend" and she said "dont tell anyone, it doesnt matter, you used to cut yourself" (which I briefly cut my wrists for 3 months last fall, it was a dumb mistake and I even told her that I only did it because I thought it would make my problems go away but it never helped) and she just tried to play it off as a huge joke, and said dont tell anyone, its not a big deal. But it was! These weren't little puny cuts they werent to big but not puny! She said she doesnt tell ppl about them (xcept that friend) but thats why she wears hoodies all yr.
I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO! I want to tell my parents but I dont want her to get mad. I really want to tell my best friend but she's not online and I'm just confused. This is my baby sister and I dont want her hurting herself. I asked her why she was doing this to herself and she didnt have a clearcut response but argh.
Please help. I really need some guidance on this I'm very confused.
Tell your parents or another adult you trust /immediately/, cutting is serious and can be a sign of other emotional problems, like depression. Your sister might be mad at you for a little while, but in the long run, she will thank you for what you did, because it would forestall any further cutting or more serious action. Then, talk to your sister directly again, tell her what a bad mistake cutting was for you, and tell her that she needs to find healthy ways to deal with her stress and problems. Assure her that you're always there for her and that it scares you that she would hurt herself, and make sure you tell her that you'll help her with whatever she's going through.
It's good of you to ask for advice first, and you seem like you would handle this just fine. And since you have a good relationship with your sister, she will listen to you as a sister and mentor.
Good luck, I hope it works out for you.
Love,
~Nevaeh
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I know i'm a dumb ass cause I don't do anything about it really... and this moral thing seems like an excuse. LIke everyone else I carry on with my life ignoring these things. These things i'm talking about are the people constantly dying around the world. Mainly all the bastards killing people, rapists... pedophiles, robbers, thieves, molestors, child-killers... parents who beat their child for no reason, people who harm other people for no reason... ugh these people, I want them all dead and I also ask why God would allow such an evil to exist as this kind. My answer to this is what i've heard before, God does not interfere in our lives, he cannot perform miracles all the time and just come down and slay all those people. So therefor God created everything and merely watches us, and when we die, we return to him. So I continue to thank my blessings and all the good thigns and good people in the world, but i've stopped really believing if I pray to God for good things or to help the O-zone layer or enlighten people it will happen. What's the point, he cannot interfere in our lives, he chooses not to and its understandable considering he's God. Anyways-- my morals are breaking. I find myself going crazy especially those bastards that make my life miserable. In my high school and grade school there were these people that constantly tormented me for no reason, even made me snap and start getting violent in grade school... then burst out in tears on my first day in a new school, new city. I'm believing to not give a shit about whether what I do is wrong or not, i'm tired of this fuckign bullshit about jail or w/e i'll kill the cops then myself for all I care as long as I take down my enemies and as much of those wretched bastards in the world. I know i'm possibly not capable of such a thing as this mass murder, i'm not that strong, but seriously i'm going crazy with all this shit and all these social problems, friends backstabbing, relationships gone wrong, physical illness is consuming my life as well now and possibly cancer, but that's an uncertainty. I don't want to die with a frown, and hating the world which has destroyed me. My family knows nothing because everyday im smiling and happy, my true friends know nothing because im always smiling and happy. Im the energetic bastard that runs around like he is on crack, willing to try new things and cracking up jokes 24/7 yet it hurts so fucking much especailly the fact that i'm unable to truly trust people. This girl.. I can't get into a relationship with her, I want to, but everytime I think about it I always feel wrong. My dreams, if involve her, I remembre them all they usually involve us being together and her cheating on me, or something happening of that sort. I cannot rest in peace and it would be best if I had no exist because this is just killing me so much, it hurts, it hurts so. Yet I cannot kill myself, for one reason and one reason only, not only have I not made up to my family whom I love and cherish as my treasure. I haven't done so well in school, of lack of motivation and sheer laziness but that's changing slwoly. I want to impress my family, live up to their kindness and efforts to raise a good successful child, and make them proud and happy before they meet their end. To make money and settle any fees they have and just make their lives good, to have children and hope they do not share the same wretched fate as me. Oh woes me, I am wretched in the inside, my mind? It dreams of death and perverted incidents with some of my friends whom I care about and want to be with yet I cannot bring myself to admit my liking to them. Destroy me, free me, yet if that is so I will never be able to repay my family for being the only people who I can assure trust in. If they were to fail me as well.. I don't know what I'd do.
Wow, you're really struggling with self-identity. I have so many thoughts on this that I don't know if I can type them all out as one answer, but I'd like to help you. If you want to e-mail me, it's elithraniel26@hotmail.com.
First, if you talk of violence against those that you despise, all you're doing is stooping to their level, becoming just like them. Don't give in to that, you're such a good person. For such things like murders and child abuse and rape, and pollution runining the ozone, it's not going to help to pray to God to fix them. What will help is if you pray for the strength and courage to work on finding a way to help stop these terrible things happening, and then do it. Kind of like the saying "God helps those who help themselves."
Now, for the people who torment you unreasonably. People fear those who are different, and from what I've read, you are very different from most people. You see the problems of our world and want very badly to fix them. You care enough to be frustrated when you can't. That's very unique, and I wish that more people were like that. Here's the thing, though. Take time to look around and see all of the people that work so hard to spread goodness on earth, and take a deep breath. It's not all dark, or so bad as you might think. Let it all go for a moment, and think of who you are, and who you're trying to be. Make sure you're on track and that you're feeling secure. Those people that torment you aren't worth anything, they're lost, and they don't know who they are, and once they mature, they'll see the light and how stupid it is to put someone down for having a little hope.
Have a little faith in humanity, there is an inherent goodness in each and every person that can be reached if you look deep enough into their soul, and can be brought out even in those people which seem to be just shells in life. Nobody that does anything to hurt other people is happy with their life, and people /want/ to be happy. They just don't know how to go about doing it, and they get lost on the way. So, breathe in, breathe out, and realize that whatever people are doing now to hurt you, you won't have to deal with them forever. Don't lose your ability to trust or to love. There is always someone left that you can trust.
Now, about this girl. What you're saying is that you want to have a relationship with her, but you picture that she's going to cheat on you or that it will somehow end and you will have your heart broken. Don't go into a relationship, or anything for that matter, with the expectation that it will end. Live for the moment, and learn from today, and trust people. There's more I have to say regarding this, but now is not the time. For the moment, I'll say a quote by Lao Tzu. "Being loved deeply by someone gives you strength, while loving someone deeply gives you courage."
Not doing well in school doesn't determine how good of a person you've become. It is my observation that you have strong morals in life, and that you know where you want to be and where you should be, you're just having a little trouble getting there. I admire you for loving your family and wanting to pay them back for all they've done for you, so many of my peers take their parents for granted. No matter how you feel now, you can get through this time. Maybe you can't change the past, or the things that have happened to you, but you can change how you look at them. What I mean to say is, your perspective on life determines how you live it. And if you've learned from your past, you can make your future into whatever you want it to be.
"...my friends whom I care about and want to be with yet I cannot bring myself to admit my liking to them..." Admit your liking to them. Always, don't keep those feelings in. They will always tear at you inside when they remain unsaid, I have learned this firsthand.
I think you're feeling like you're not good enough, like you've failed everyone's expectations including your own. Truly, that is a terrible thing to feel. But you can overcome it, and you can become everything you want yourself to be. Just have faith in change, time, and love, and you will surely find yourself again.
I am so glad that I found a person on this site that cares so much about being upstanding, and it saddens me that you should be feeling so down on yourself. Cheer up, and email me or ask for advice anytime.
Love,
~Nevaeh
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what is (sp?) ppl always write that what is it?
It means (Spelling?). They're saying that they're not sure of the spelling of a word.
~Nevaeh
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okay my friend got fingured by her boyfriend. shes just about 2 weeks late for her period, and she keeps asking me if that could have affected her period track. she keeps thinking shes pregant, but i know that cant be the case. can someone finguring you cause you to skip a period? or any thing? please post and fast with advice!!
Tell her not to worry unless she's noticing other symptoms like a sick stomach, headaches, or rashes. Especially if she's within the first two or three years of getting her first period, the cycle isn't perfectly regulated yet. It's normal to have your period on irregular days, or even to skip a month in between two. If she's still worried, she can talk to her doctor, and she should also do that if she's noticing anything else that's irregular. But I'd say don't worry.
~Nevaeh
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Ok, me and this girl have been talkin' 4 a while now (for like 6 months). We were just friends at first but I've always liked her. She's been in really bad relationships and thinks men are dogs and will treat her like dirt. I really like her though and I wouldn't do anything like that. I like her too much. Plus I'm not even that kinda guy. I wanna love her and show her trust, honesty, and loyalty. She's been so hurt that she can't see that I wouldn't do that to her. I wanna be with her; she is the most incredible girl I've ever met. On top of that I think I like her so much it might be turning into Love. I need some GOOD advice. Help!
P.S. I'll rate high.
You said it yourself. SHOW her trust, honesty, and loyalty. Show her that there are some amazing, good, honest guys out there, that will treat her like she should be treated. Show her loyalty as a friend and be there for her when she's going through a tough time. You sound like you really know what a relationship and love should be based on, so I'm not going to go into that. Just draw on that knowledge, and she'll eventually see what an incredible guy you are. Wait it out, though, as hard as it is, she's not going to be able to trust right away, it's something that's going to happen gradually with each time you show her that you're there for her and will always be there.
You're one of the only guys I've come across on this site that actually seem to have some integrity and maturity about them. Best of luck to you.
Love,
Nevaeh
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what do i do, my girlfriend is geting hi on by her ex, but im not the violent type, or the type o confront, so how do i handle it? it really messes with me, cse it seems like she isnt making it clear to him that her and i are together and there is no chance for him... i dont know. but i really love her and this kind of stuff it aggrovating to try and handle...
Don't take any action against him. Talk to your girlfriend and tell her that it really bothers you when he hits on her. Make sure she's told him that it bothers her as well, and that she's with you and he's not going to get her back by trying to pull her away from you. However hard it may be to handle, just know that if you really love and trust your girlfriend, there's nothing to worry about. If it doesn't work when she talks to him, tell him to back off yourself, but don't get too angry, be civil, and it will go down better. Good luck.
:) Nevaeh
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On Xxrocker's column page, I posted a huge question about this girl who I was friends with, but had a crush on. I asked how to tell her that I like her. Well, now, I've told her, and she sent me a huge long email, where every other word was "sorry", and that she liked me as a friend, didn't want to break the friendship, I'm the coolest guy she's ever met, etc. etc. etc.
I tried to shrug it off, I e-mailed her saying that I really didn't care, I was just wondering, all that jazz. Only problem is, ever since I got one girlfriend, I've developed a need for them in my life. I'm really scrrewed up now, I keep thinking about her... I need her... or someone... only problem is, there's no one else! My only other girlfriend ever was online, and she's never on anymore! I'm kinda messed up now, even more than I had been when I thought she liked me.... Everyone was sure that she liked me and had been flirting with me all year, I shoulda accepted their bets.
Fellow advicenators, what should I do?
Keep your friendship with this girl, first of all. Friends are some of the most important people in your life, and they'll be there for you through breakups, and other things that you can't share with anyone else.
Now, for this friend of yours. (I'm going to call her Jane.) When Jane says that she cares about you as a friend, she really means it. I can tell you a bit of what she probably felt when she found out. She really, really didn't want to hurt you, but just didn't see you as a boyfriend, and she didn't know how to tell you. She probably stressed over it for a while, and finally decided that the best way to tell you so that she could get all her thoughts out was by email. I'm a girl (as you've probably guessed), and this happened between myself and a friend very recently. Apparently my best friend had really strong feelings for me, but I just didn't see him as a boyfriend, because he just wasn't quite what I was looking for. he's having a really hard time getting over it (like you) and I just wish that he could see how much that hurts to know that I hurt him. He's my best friend, and I trust him with anything and everything. I love him to death, and would turn to him with anything or be there for him through anything. Sometimes it's better to have a friend for that, and I don't know what I'd do without him. So honestly, I'm guessing Jane really values your friendship, and she wants to be there for you and visa versa, but she's looking somewhere else for love right now.
now, about your dependency on having a girlfriend. Try to realize that while it can be nice to have someone there for you in the 'girlfriend' sense, there's a few things you have to get straight before anything's going to work out. First, you have to know who you are. Not completely, we're all still searching at this age, but make sure you're not lost, and that you're comfortable with the person that you've become. Trust me, a girl is going to like a guy if they truly have something unique about themselves, and their personality. Know what those things are. Next, you have to see that getting a girlfriend just to have someone there shoudn't be what it's about. If you're genuinely interested in another person, and what they think about and feel, and their hopes, dreams, fears, their perspective on life, and if you truly have a desire to know every detail of this person, you know that you truly like them. Wait it out until you find that person where you just smack yourself and say "That's her."
Good luck, hope this helps.
:) Nevaeh
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I am 5'1 and 140 lbs. I am really wanting to loose at least 15 lbs. before school starts back because I feel that I am a lil chubby..if anyone knows of any kind of excercises or tips so make this much easier or of a quick weight loss thing that has worked for you..let me know, please?!
Pay more attention to you diet (like what you eat, not "diet"). For me, I've found that eating smaller meals more throughout the day helps, and just taking a brisk walk once or twice a day. Just try to realize when you're really hungry, and when you're eating because you're bored, or just want something to munch on.
The best exercise is walking, or jogging. Biking is good too, and swimming burns a lot of calories. If you have a play station and you've heard of the game Dance Dance Revolution, that's really good for fun exercise, and doesn't really make you think about what you're doing. Otherwise, try exercises targeted to areas you want to tone on your body, like for your stomach, doing crunches, or for your arms lifting like small weights. Hope this helps, good luck.
:) Nevaeh
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sigh, why does life suck so much? Literally, i've been backstabbed and bullied on when i was a kid in grade school, first year university now... I still can't learn to trust and am so paranoid around people. Um, i'm in a situation where I hate relationships, how troublesome they are, where I feel like I want to be with some girls but the feeling of being crushed... again ...prevents that so I stay alone, and remain alone just considering people as friends and being close. Sure it's a blast but the whole thing drives me insane. I don't know, like a lot of the girls i've actually had some feeling for, before it develops I always push them away, finding how who they like or encouraging them when they think they've found someone (if they're a good person) :/ ... though I laugh, smile, and joke about these things, I really don't want them to go and it always drives me insane. This is killing me so much and not to mention my friendship with a few people is failing horribly. Again I feel betrayed and destroyed, I just got backstabbed again which just KILLS. Yeah well what to do, how can I learn to trust again? This feeling is so heavy on my heart it makes me suffocate and kills me to the point I find myself shaking my head and going crazy.
First, take a deep breath and look in the mirror. Who have you become? It's time to let the past go, and realize that even if being bullied has made you uneasy around other people, it's taught you that relationships are something you miss and need when you feel like you can't put your trust in people. You seem like you see the value of good, healthy relationships, where a lot of people don't. Remember that people change so much in personality, morals, and perspective after grade school and high school. Most are over the period of trying to find themselves and are more into trying to discover who another person is. Trust, friendship, and someone by your side becomes very important in life at a certain age, and most people have matured enough to see that bullying, teasing, and putting people down does no good to themselves or anyone else.
People change, and friendships diminish and fail, which is what you're going through now. However hard that is, realize that true, good friends will always be there by your side, and the others might pass just like chapters in your life, but you'll have laughed, learned, and lived with them all the same. Take what you can from it, and let the rest go.
Now, to the matter of relationships. Have fun, flirt, laugh, but don't try to hard to find anything by way of a serious relationship, it will find you. When you do feel that a person is right for you, you want to try to bring them closer, rather than push them away. Try to understand that this person /wants/ to get to know the real you, and everything you think about and feel. Get to know that person too, and instead of going into something thinking that it will end like everything else, focus on the now. Learn to live for today, without dwelling too much on yesterday or tomorrow. Once that happens, trust will come automatically, as easily as breathing. Especially if you really feel you know a person, and they have strong morals and know who they are and what they want in life. There's always the tiny chance that things won't work out, but have faith that if they don't, they weren't meant to be, and move on with your life. Again, people change, over and over, as a result of everything they experience and learn in life. Sometimes it brings people closer together, and sometimes apart, but whatever happens, remember that you're /living/, and feel just how sweet that is.
Good luck, hope this helps.
~Nevaeh
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