Last Updated: March 25, 2014
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*About Me
I am twenty-one, soon to be twenty-two, and currently work in a loan servicing department. I truly enjoy my job, as well as college, in which I am reaching my last year to receive my degree. I am an outgoing person whom loves to have fun, be with my best friends and family, go shopping and most importantly, helping others.
Helping others has always been my passionate, from a young age I knew that I wanted to help other people and be a great influence in making someone's life turn for the better. My main goal in life is to help others, and in addition to helping all of you on Advicenators -- you all are important to me, and look forward to helping you all that I can.
Anything you would like advice on, please feel free to ask me. I'll answer honestly and openly, without judgement.
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Gender: Female
Location: Laguna Beach, CA
Occupation: Loan Servicing Employee
Age: 21
Member Since: September 29, 2006
Answers: 2522
Last Update: April 21, 2014
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13/f i haven't gotten my first period yet but when i do im planning to use tampons but is it okay if i practice putting the applicator in? thanks. (link)
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That's okay, you can go ahead and practice. Just be sure to take it out immediately. If it starts hurting, don't try to insert it any further. Really you'll be just fine if you wait until you start your period. Just keep some on hand and you can always start with pads, they are much more comfortable in my opinion. I still use them 10 to 1 over tampons and I have had my period for years.
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how can i hint that i want a boy to ask me out? (link)
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Hi, friend. Here's a safe website that I checked myself and it's a little guide telling you how to hint you like a guy. :)
http://www.wonderhowto.com/how-to-hint-boy-that-like-him-081449/
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i was talking to this guy i like and hes been busy with work and we was texting he said he was going to bed so i said goodnight silly text me sometime even if its fuck you or something laugh out loud and he said ok next time i want to fuck ill holla laugh out loud jk(just kidding) i said laugh out loud your funny what i mean is text me sometime because i kno your busy but id like to hear from ya and that your still alive and kicking he said damn wasnt tryin to be funny laugh out loud ok i will get some rest. what does he mean by all of that? (link)
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He's just flirting with you, however, you may want to keep an eye out just to make sure he isn't just after your body.
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this isn't really an advice question, more of an opinionated question. this question is about hell. anyone, everyone; tell me about your views on hell. do you think its a big, flaming pit? are there different levels? is it based on our greatest fears? tell me what you think, i'm doing a project for school. (link)
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Hell is a reality for everyone. There is good and there is evil. God resides with good in Heaven, while evil resides in hell, the bottomless pit, under the watchful eye of the Devil; Satan. Hell is a nightmare to those who are not saved, but those who are saved will be off to Heaven, and should have no fear of this place, as you will not be going there. In Revelations, it tells us that there are sort of levels of evil (some even more evil than others in hell) and kind of takes a tour.
If you'd like more information, the Bible will be a big help for you, read Revelations.
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In your opinion do you think a 15 year old girl and a 16 year old boy have a long distance relationship? Do you think it would be worth it or not?
Thanks! (link)
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Well, anything is possible and for true love, it can last a million miles away -- however, being just fourteen and fifteen, it's most likely not true love, even if it sometimes feels like it. A lot of times it's just infatuation or a major crush or puppy love. I would say that if you aren't truly certain you really love each other and it's going to last, it's not going to be worth it and you'll most likely get lonely not being able to see each other. Believe me, it's very difficult. I spend most of my days in tears when I couldn't see my boyfriend when we were in a long distance relationship.
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ok i am a teenager and i really need help! so i just got my period and there is one problem...when i tried to put in a tampon>>>i couldn't find the hole it goes in :-*( please dont laugh at me...it is extremely embarassing and i dont know what to do... i know it is there though HELP. (link)
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Hi friend, do not be embarassed. Every girl goes through this, including myself, I have certainly been in your shoes. Everything will be okay, it just takes time to learn and find a comfortable tampon. I prefer pads myself and you may want to try those instead, I find them much more comfortable. However, to answer your question, I am giving you two safe websites that I have checked out. They both explain to you all about tampons and give you illustrations as to how and where to insert them. Good luck. :)
http://www.youngwomenshealth.org/tampon.html
http://www.helpingteens.org/articles/sex-sexuality-pregnancy/tampon-trouble-get-to-know-your-tampons.html
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I want to try dyeing my hair different colors, and I want to see which one really suits me as quickly as possible. So when you have nonpermanent haircolor, how long does it last? Can you just wash it out or does it wear off more quickly than the other ones?
Thank you for all your help!
PS even if you don't know all the answers please just give me your experiences with hair coloring. (link)
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Hi, friend. This website is safe and it will tell you all about hair coloring in general and semi-permanent hair color -- I checked it out for you. :)
http://www.hairboutique.com/tips/tip095.htm
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I know the south beach diet is targeted for diabetics, but is it also healthy for nondiabetics? (I am a 5 ft 1, 155 lb female. I need to lose weight and this seems like the best diet.) (link)
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I didn't actually know it was targeted for diabetics. I'm a non-diabetic and I have tried it before, however, it wasn't the best and the food tastes terribly.
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I was wondering, even if I'm not sexually active or anything..and I just want to get on the pill (for my period), would I still need a pap smear? Also, what other things should I expect during my appointment with the gynecologist? (link)
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My gynocologist doesn't give me a pap smear because I'm not sexually active, however, yours may give you one just be safe. It's depends on your doctor, but it won't hurt or be painful, it's just more uncomfortable than anything. But you most likely won't have to have one done.
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i think i might be a lesbian. how do i tell? i mean i have had sex with guys before (only 5) but its getting boring...i mean i dont get off very easily anymore and i dont look forward to having sex. i mean the kissing and foreplay is fine but the actual pentrating kinda turns me off. could i be a lesbian or is there something wrong with me? (link)
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This doesn't strike me as being a lesbian, friend. This strikes me as that the guys you have been with have not been satisfying you enough, whether it be they are not using enough foreplay, lubrication, etc. Maybe when they are penetrating you, they are being too rough wth you or not rough enough, considering everyone is different when it comes to getting turned on.
Maybe you should try oral sex with guys and see if that helps you to become more turned on, then try penetration. Everyone has different turn on's, just try to find yours. I don't think you're a lesbian at all, you just need to find what really turns you on and explain and suggest these things to the guy you are with.
Best of luck, friend.
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I've been in a long distance relationship for 9 months. We're recently broken up, and I showed my boyfriend fake pictures, and only JUST showed him my actual self a few days ago. I was terrified to tell him, but he actually took it MUCH better than I thought he would. He was a little upset at what I did, but said he still loved me, and if I 'work with him a little bit' by showing him more pics of my real self & maybe getting a webcam, then we could get back together.
We both have strong feelings for eachother, & I (stupidly) ended the relationship because I knew I could never meet him since I sent fake pics. But now, he knows what I really look like, and accepted me, so a relationship is possible again.
This is my only problem. I've only showed him shoulders up pics of me. I'm not fat..but curvy. He's a tall, lanky guy, VERY skinny, he only weighs 120 lbs! But, I weigh more than that, & I'm scared to show him pics of my whole body. He's been asking for 'bikini'/full body pics & for me to get a webcam, but I honestly don't have any bikini pics, because I hate my body. I think it's too curvy, and it's my #1 insecurity.
Anyway, I do love him, & I realize if he can get over me faking pics, & he does like my face..then can my body really be a cause for him to stop loving me? I'm just scared he'll be unattracted to me, and won't want to tell me because he's too nice.
Basically what I'm asking is: 1. How should I go about showing him pics of my full body? Just send him a bunch then say I have to leave quickly? (I don't want to be there when he sees them, hahah) 2. Should I get a webcam if he accepts the pics the way they are? It's not really like I'd be showing my body on there anyway, he'd really only see my face. Thank you. (link)
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First off, thanks for asking me a question! Secondly, this is really heartbreaking to me, my friend. I can tell that this has really torn you up and I think you need a big confidence boost. You sound beautiful and seem to be a beautiful person and I am so thankful you're over 120 Ibs -- nobdoy likes a stick figure, haha. I love curves, they are so beautiful and that's a real woman, so you always keep that in mind. Do things that make you feel beautiful and treat yourself to little manicures (if you're like me and cannot afford to get those big fancy ones, do them yourself, it's fun), take a warm bath and relax, just whatever makes you feel at your best.
Now, onto your questions.
1) I do not think you should at all, friend. Actually, I think you were right in the first place by not showing him pictures of your actual self. I understand how that may make you feel guilty as you have been dating this guy over the internet for nine months, a considerably long time, however, you must remember -- this is over the internet, and guys aren't always what they seem (that's in real life, as well). Something that really bothers me is that he told you
to "work with him a little bit."
Please take a moment to think about that, doesn't that seem a bit disturbing? It's like he's trying to make you feel even more guilty so you'll surrender to him for his own sexual pleasure, understand what I mean? I don't like this at all friend and I know it's been nine months of your life talking to this guy online, but really, within the nine months, he shouldn't have even asked this of you. Of course, I am not sure of your age, so I'm not sure of any legal issues, but I find this a problem regardless of age.
2. No, this will only be giving into him more. I think that it would best to end this relationship friend. After all, you mentioned you'd never be able to meet, therefore, why waste your time any longer? You could find a guy who you don't have to "work with a little bit" for him to love or get back together with you. In fact, if he really loved you, would he really say that you have work with him a little bit for his own sexual needs? I think we both know that the answer is "no" to that question.
I'm sorry friend if you were looking for a different answer, but I have to tell you the truth. This is heartbreaking just to read, and I feel very bad that you have invested such time in someone who has only seemed to take advantage. However, I am so proud of you for NOT showing him the real you. Not because you aren't beautiful because I bet you are gorgeous, friend, you certainly are on the inside just from reading this -- but because it was the safe and right thing to do. Save yourself some trouble, more time, and heartache and ditch this guy, please.
Thank you again for writing me and I hope that you will take my advice. Please feel free to send me an update (just send it as a question to me, like this one) or if you have any more questions, I will be more than happy to answer it. Best of luck to you my friend, please keep your head held high and find your confidence and flaunt those curves, honey! :)
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So i met this guy, and by his looks he is definitely not my type. Infact, i dont go for guys out of my race. (He's still half white though). But he has an amazing personalility, all the qualities of a guy im looking for; he's beyond perfect. I want to ask him out, but the looks are bothering me. I know looks have nothing to do with anything, but even though i like him, i dont think i could do anything physical with him like kissing. Do you think its just because its in my head? And do you think a relationship can last even though you arent sexually attracted to them? Do you think i should just be friends or go for something more? (link)
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Sometimes we have to look past the looks because some of those really hot, good looking guys are just jerks and very cocky. I understand it may be hard for you to date someone out of your race, but this may open your eyes a bit. And if you start to fall for him, I guarantee that the looks won't matter because that will start to attract you to him. However, if you see that it's going to nowhere, you should definitely go back to being friends rather than leading him on.
Good luck.
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why is important for us to accept and feel the emotion we are feeling? why is bad to be in denial or try to fight it? is it true that if we keep bottling up emotions or feelings we won't really notice the things around us? (link)
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When we bottle up our emotions and hold the inside, it causes us to hold grudges, feel like a weight is on our back, or a burden we are constantly carrying. The emotional issues will always come to haunt you, you will always notice the things around you at one time or another.
It's like alcohol. You may drink, get drunk all night long, but when you wake up -- your problems are still there.
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what flat iron do you reccomend? (link)
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I recommend Conair. They have always worked well for me.
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I've known my best friend since 4th grade, and we're almost 20 now. She's been dating her boyfriend for a while. Her boyfriend and my boyfriend used to be best friends, but there was a bunch of drama a while back and they stopped talking. Recently, we all started talking again and everything seemed fine. But today, my friend called me and said that ever since our boyfriends have started talking again, he's been really mean to her and has been acting like he doesn't need her anymore. This was definitely not what me and my boyfriend wanted, we thought it would make everything better since we could all hang out again without the awkwardness. But he's been calling her names and telling her what to do, and just acting weird. Any advice for this situation? (link)
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It seem that unfortunately you all reuniting didn't work out, so I recommend just breaking away from the friendship (your boyfriend and her boyfriend, not you and your best friend). For whatever reason, it seems that your boyfriend and her boyfriend's friendship is toxic, so that should be ended for good.
However, this really shouldn't make her boyfriend treat her so badly (unless that may have to do with the falling out between your boyfriend and her boyfriend). Regardless, your best friend needs to talk to her boyfriend and let him know he cannot treat her this way and she does not deserve this. If he continues to treat her that way, I would tell her to break it off.
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So I've decided to get on the pill before I start having sex.
I have an appointment coming up to get the pills.
I don't plan on rushing into sex as soon as I start birth control, but just in case, how long should I abstain from sex until the birth control kicks in? (link)
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One month, however, if you want to be extra safe, you could wait another week after that.
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i have been dating an amazing guy for about a month, he is a year younger but he is so clingy. i really like him but we havent become like official boyfriend girlfriend yet. so people say im leading him on, playing him and takeing advantage, useing, being a cougar, but im nottt i just am so uneasy about this.. im still hurting from my ex who was also my bff bf and everything, cheated on me, we were the longest couple iv ever known. he says he will wait for me, even today though i went with friends and hes babysitting but he texted me so much my phone died.. clingy. what can i do i really like him, im nott using him i dont wana hurt him ever, hes to obsessive and already whipped, but hes such a sweet guy. should i become officalish or no... also what would be good places or dates to go for us since we arent tooo..? im 16 nearly 17 and a suberban chicka (link)
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You may not like my answer friend, but I have had a lot (too much) experience with this type of situation -- don't date him and let him know there is no hope. I know you like him and he's so sweet and nice and would do anything in the world for you, however, he's already showing bad signs. He's clingy, you can't keep your phone on, he's a whipped pup...you don't want to really date a guy like this, do you? Also, as time goes on, it will only get worse.
I "talked" to a guy like this, exactly like this, and he turned into crazy stalker. I had to leave my phone turned off because he called constantly (literally), when I did turn it on if I wasn't ringing again I had 30 some voicemails (no joke) and they were each like 3 minutes long. I don't want you to go through this and that's why you need to tell him that you like him, however, it would be best if you stayed friends.
I couldn't stay friends with the guy I was talking to, but maybe you can. Just make sure you tell him that and end it now because you both get hurt.
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So this kid I like goes to my school, but we dont have classes together. Soon I found out he had an instand messanger and he was also SINGLE, and I started to talk to him. He's really funny and has a personality that was sooo amazing. Everything was perfectly normal, we talked and flirted. However, one day I told the guy i started to like him, and in about an hour this girl messages me and says stop flirting with her bf. For me that was a blow to my face, so I told her I would back off. After that incident, I messaged the guy I liked and i asked him if he had a girlfriend. He said YES! And that really upset me and i told him I wouldnt have liked him if he told me that he already had a gf. After that we talked and we cooled things down.
About two weeks later, I was on the computer and stumbled upon the girl's profile. It said she was single and she lives in another state. Also I looked the guy I like profile and he was single too. So I had a feeling he had lied to me, becuase he never had changed his status into in a relationship. So I talked to him about the disaster again.
The guy I liked started to talk. When I had said I liked him, he told the girl(the person who emailed me) about it. So I guess she was jealous of competetion for him.... But I asked him why he lied about having a gf, and he sayd Idk. So this is what I need answered. Why do you think he lied to me about it?
Female 14 (link)
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He lied to you because he wanted his cake and to be able to eat it too. He's not a good guy, if he was, he would have told you in the beginning. Just kick this guy to the curb, he's one of those dumb boys every girl cannot stand.
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how do you tell if a guy actually likes you or if hes just using you for action?
thanks
kaitlyn (link)
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The difference is that a guy who likes you will not be afraid to let anyone know abbout it, will date you (if permitted by his and your parents), will take you on dates (if old enough and able), will treat your with respect and be very kind and caring towards you. However, a guy who is using you will sometimes try to hide that he's with you or say "It's best to just not tell anyone, it'll be our little secret...", will or won't date but will only take you on dates that you can get "action" on or won't take you on dates because he only wants the "action." Sometimes he won't treat you very nicely, only if he gets what he wants.
If you find a guy is using you, kick him to the curb. You don't deserve that friend.
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is there any possible way to make my nipples smaller? they're not HUGE, but they are bigger than i want them. and also, they're a little puffy. is there anything i can do? i hate it and i'm so self conscious. (link)
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No, however, you shouldn't want them to be. You must recognize and appreciate the little things about your body and that's one of those things. And if you'r worried about a guy seeing them one day, don't think that he will be disappointed. That's not going to be anything that affects your relationship.
Love your body and try to build up some confidence, friend. :)
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