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Ok, I am 17 and I have been with my boyfriend for almost two years. We lost our virginity to each other, and its wonderful because we love each other. However, my mom asked me to wait until after I graduated from high school and I told her I would, but I didn't. Now she wants to take me to the gynocologist, which is fine. I want to go and I want to make sure I'm healthy and start on birth control pills. But I don't want her to know I am sexually active. Will my doctor tell her? I am under 18, so does she have to tell my mom everything that happens because I am a minor? And how can I make it confidential without my mom being suspicious? I want her in the exam with me, because I know I will be scared, but I don't want the doctor to tell my mom. Will the doctor have a question and answer session with me alone before the physical exam so I can tell her? (link)
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Your doctor will not tell her. I do think the best thing though would be for you to go in alone. I know it is scary but it will give you an opportunity to ask questions and talk with the doctor. Most of the time the talking is done before the exam. A nurse is with you the whole time too.
I'm afraid as a mom myself I would be suspicious if my daughter wanted me there for the exam but not the talking. I can't think of anything that would make me NOT be.
Here is a website for you to look at. It explains the exam just in case you haven't had one before. If you have or if you already know whats going on just skip it.
Pelvic exams 10 things about…http://teenadvice.about.com/library/bl10thingspelvicexam.htm
Pelvic exams……………………http://www.coolnurse.com/pelvic_exams.htm
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This isent really a question, its more of a statement..Im from Canada, and over here we dont use AOL, which would explain why i dident know what aim was.
Back to my question..it doesnt matter to me, but I was just wondering why some people in here laugh at people when giving answers, I thought this was an advice colum.
So whats the deal with that, i personally dont care, however some people might take offence to it. (link)
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I agree. I think it is rude too. I don't know why they do it.
Same could be said for calling people sweetie, honey and names such as those. Some people could be offended and it sounds condescending.
Sorry I can't give you an answer. But, I agree its a little rude. Even though I'm sure they don't mean it to be. :)
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what is Pcp? i know it is some kind of drug but what kind and what does it do? (link)
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phen·cy·cli·dine (fĕn-sī'klĭ-dēn', -dĭn, -sĭk'lĭ-)
n.
Used in veterinary medicine as an anesthetic and illegally as a hallucinogen; PCP
It is a very dangerous drug when used by humans. :)
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im confused about what to do with my ex cody, its like i get the hot and cold responses from him, so to speak. sometimes he's extrememly nice and we flirt and get along GREAT and others he seems completely shy and doesnt talk to me.
i have liked him since august (it now being january) and in august when i told him that he said he liked me too. so he kind of dragged his feet .. not sure what he wanted .. didnt know waht to do . the usual guy thing. and when i'd finally given up hope on him and me he left me a message at midnight on october 10th like three months later sayin he wanted to give us a try. only to dump me 10 days late b/c he he liked someone else .. then he told me a couple weeks later that he wouldn't have dumped me for her if she hadn't had a boyfriend ..
so that was like november .. now its january and the guy is still all i think of. i try so hard to get over him .. but like around every other corner hes either makin me fall for him again or his friends are being COMPLTELY honest and telling me stuff he says.
like shawn told me that they talk about me all the time (he wouldnt say what but he said the stuff worked in my favor) and that in our study hall (me him and cody have it together) he cant wait for me to come out and talk to them .. and i asked him to stop jokin around w/ me and he went off sayin how honest and truthful he was being ..
then new years cody called. he came and got me on his snowmobile. me and his brother and friend hung out from 9 to 3. we hung out. watched fireworks in the barn by ourselves. hung out around the bon fire. laughed constantly and flirted. i thought it went great .. i had like good hopes you know .. we fell asleep on the couch then they brought me home. he said he'd call. yeah a week and half later .. no call. we talk at school . nothing big hey and how are u kinda stuff ..
i know its probably worthless to waste my time .. and you can be completley honest in tellin me so. but like even though my head knows that .. i cant let go .. 5 months later .. jesus look at me .. in so far i cant even get out .. i've never fallen for anyone like i've fallen for cody. he tells me he can see us dating in the future but doesnt do anything about it .. i just dont know what he wants .. its like this i guess to explain it well ..
It's like a routine.
I fall for him on Monday.
I like him from Tuesday to Thursday.
He make me mad on Friday.
I think I'm over him over the weekend.
But the SECOND I see him on Monday morning
I fall for him again and again
i just dont know what to do ..
so now that i've finished my freakin book .. im sorry its soo long. i just want all the details in it .. sorry sorry sorry.
alyssa05x@aol.com .. if you need more info or something doens't make sense.
i really appreciate it and im sorry about the length .. thanks in advance (link)
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I think you need to have a talk with young Cody.
You need to say listen buster, you need to stop leading me on. Either we are an item...and that means we go out, you call, we hang out, talk etc. OR I will look elsewhere for entertainment!
I can't blame you for feeling a bit confused, who wouldn't be. You really do need to talk to him and find out where you stand.
What does he mean he can see you dating in the future? Does that mean he isn't ready for a relationship at all? You might remind him that you may not still be available if he waits to long.
If you can't get a straight answer out of him, then don't waste a lot more time for him. Don't put your life on hold. If your available in the future when he feels mature enough for a relationship, try it then. In the mean time, go find someone to have fun with.
Hope you get him straightened out so it will be him. :)
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Alright I have to do this vocabulary thing for communication arts for Cambridge [ this really stupid thing that they are making us do ] and I have to use the dictionary to find words that start with certain prefixes. Now my problem is I can`t find an actual dictionary online and www.dictionary.com doesn`t work. I already tired that. So do you have any other good websites that could maybe help me ? Thanks in advance. (link)
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Here is what I came up with. Hope you find something among them that will help. :)
http://www.virtualsalt.com/roots.htm
http://www.freeglossary.com/List_of_English_prefixes
http://www.ipedia.com/list_of_english_prefixes.html
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Wiktionary_Appendix:Prefixes
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Is it normal to be depressed most the time when your a teenager is that a natural thing or are u soppose to be all happy and shit? i'll rate, just a little curious (link)
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Everyone gets depressed.
I don't know for certain weather or not teens are depressed MOST of the time, but I think with all the life changes going on it is possible.
You can be depressed for a couple of weeks, snap out of it and be okay for a while. Maybe you will get depressed again a couple of months later. This is not a big problem.
The time when depression becomes something you need to be treated for is when you fall into a major funk that lasts for months, and you just cannot snap out of it.
Sorry for the ramble, that's probably more than you wanted to know! :)
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I went on a blind date today and it didnt excactly turn out the way I wanted it to. Well for starters, I had agreed to meet him at a local coffee shop with the couple that set us up. He was late and when he did show up he didnt look too happy when he saw me for the first time. He didnt offer to buy me anything to drink or eat, and the whole time we ended up talking about his friends or his business. He didnt ask me any questions about me or my personal life or interests, which indicated that he wasnt too crazy about me. We all talked for about a half hour, and when the couple the introduced us had to leave, my date looked at his watch and said he had to go. He never offered me his number or asked for mine. He actually looked like he couldnt wait to get out of there. The other couple looked surprised and thought we would have stayed longer. My friend (the wife of the other couple) I think felt bad and invited me over to her place afterwards.
Is it just me, or was my blind date really rude? I don't understand what I did to make him act like this, the whole time I was polite and engaged him in conversation.
Any feedback will be appreciated. I rate high! (link)
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I hate to say he sounds like a first class jerk.
He was rude. He doesn't sound like anyone I would go out with again. I mean really, he could have at least made an attempt at getting to know you a little.
I'm sure it wasn't you. Maybe he just didn't want to come in the first place. Whatever the reason, be glad its over! There are other guys out there who are better than he is.
Hope you find one soon! :)
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Okay, I'd really appreciate your opinion specifically. If you're able to help me out, I'd be ever so thankful!!!
I'm a seventeen year old, female, by the way.
Basically, I'm not a good eater. At all. It just doesn't happen. I just don't do it. Sometimes for one to two straight weeks at a time. I suppose that's just the foolish way I deal with my "unhappiness".
Okay, and so.. I haven't tried to hide this from my family. I just don't come down to dinner, and don't touch the food they leave in my room for me. It's not a big secret. To be honest, I guess I like the fact that I'm being a total moron and not eating. I know that's not something to be proud of, but it makes me happy. I've been this way for about a year now, and I'm glad my family doesn't jump my back about it.
Thing is: why the hell don't they!?! I know you're not a mind reader, and I'm not expecting you to be, but wouldn't you assume that they would be worried? I know you have no way of truly knowing this, but WHY do you think that they are not speaking up about this? Why aren't they mad? We never ever mention it. Only my immediate family knows, and I want to keep it this way.
It just seems that I'm more concerned for myself than they are. They're loving parents; great parents! But, it seems they don't have any objections about this, and that worries me. Well, this problem shouldn't be going on whatsoever, but to be occurring for a year is utter craziness and stupidity!! I know this type of behavior is unhealthy, and I'm willing to stop. But the thing is, to "stop", I feel I'd need to find "happiness" first. And I'm not expecting total "happiness", but just something better than what I've got right now. It doesn't work for me, plain and simple. True.. it's JUST as simple as picking up a burger and ramming it in my face - that's all it takes, physically. The thing is, "mentally", or whatever, it's much more than that.
Again, I feel the only way I can kick this poor behavior in the ass is to find "happiness". I know I can find that "happiness" somewhere else, meaning.. move out of my home. And, I'm okay with that. I want to do that. I NEED to do that. I'd really like to have my parents blessing on this, but I don't need it to take action.
My Dad is okay, and said if I wanna go, the door is always open, whether I'm coming or going. But my Mom is just as furious as can be!! I feel this is going to HELP me. I NEED to do this. Why the hell isn't my Mom phased about my not eating, yet she flips at the thought of my moving out?? You might also want to take into consideration that if I moved out, I would not stay within the state. I would, however, get a place by my brother. My brother is 33 and an EMT. I honestly feel this move would be the best thing for me. Hell, I'd consider moving in with my brother and getting a job to pay my rent at his place, all to help set my Mother's mind at ease. Problem there is, he doesn't have any room at his house. Therefore, that is impossible.
Anyhow, I'd like a Mother's opinion on this, if you'd be willing to dish it out. I've considered the fact that she might believe I'm doing it for the attention. But, I've been this way for AT LEAST a year. It is not "for the attetion", it is my LIFE! It's how I LIVE! :(
I guess my overall question is this: do you think it'd be nerve of me to be upset at my parents for being disappointed at my want to move out to improve my health and well being?? I know that if I do this, I can support myself. Okay, and if not.. then I fail, but I'm willing to accept living with that. And either way, it's been voiced over a million times that the doorway here is always open, and I am always welcome.
Reviewing this, I'm noticing the length. This one is a doozy, but your opinion means more than you know to me.... (link)
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I think your family, probably especially your mom is in denial about your not eating.
She probably tells herself you eat at school or at a friends house, whatever. I'm sure she would care big time if she knew different. She may even try to deny its a problem even if you confronted her with it.
Since you know it isn't good for you to be doing this, I'm not going to give you a speech about it. I know you're smart enough to know the best thing is to get help. Soon. I hope you will.
I honestly don't think being happy will make a difference. Your body gets used to not eating. You need brain food to be happy anyway, vicious circle. :(
I think you also know in the back of your head somewhere that your brother, being an EMT will notice and say something.
Talk to your parents. Tell them whats going on. Go to your brothers if you need to after that. Find the happiness if you can. If you don't sounds like Dad will let you come back home.
You know the first step. Tell your parents. Then get some help. You may think you can help yourself, but, from what I have read that is very hard to do, and really not safe.
Good luck. Let me know how it goes, I will be thinking about you. :)
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i am 14 years old and guys just don't seem interested in me. i am a tom-boy and just seem like one of the guys to them. i flirt occasionally but don't go overboard with it. all of the boys at my school see me like their "sister" or the "girl next door" i am really good friends with a group of guys but i am afraid friends is all we will ever be. how can i get them to notice me as a girl who has "girlfriend potential" not just as a friend who is a girl? i am crushing really hard on this boy who has a girlfriend. we flirt and talk sometimes and he acts like he likes me but he is staying with his girlfriend. what can i do to get this guy to see me as a potential girlfriend and not just a friend? thanks in advance! i'll rate! (link)
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A lot of guys your age just aren't ready for serious girlfriends yet. Girls mature much faster than the boys.
You are already friends with them. One of these days they will open their eyes and say "Hey! shes a girl!". Give it some time. They will notice. :)
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Like I said before, my girlfriend and I have been together for 3 years now, I love her with all my heart, and I know she loves me, however, I have noticed over the past couple of months that things are slowly changing...example, we have not been intimate for like 2 months, we just dont spend as much time together as we used to. There are a couple of things that she has wanted me to do, and I have failed to. When i spoke to her about "us", it became very clear to me that she loves me deeply, i can see it in her eyes. She doesnt call me like she used to, in fact I dont remember the last time we had a make out session. I need some serious advice on what Im supposed to do, how am i supposed to deal with all of this "rejection"? (link)
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You really have to talk to her about how you're feeling. It makes it easier if you write it down in letter form and let her read it. Then talk.
Something is going on with her if she has done a sudden turn around. Were the things she asked you to do for her more important in her eyes than yours maybe? Is that what has her upset?
Try to think back to what went on right before she started being distant. See if you can't figure out what it may be that's bothering her. If you can't think of anything, write a letter to her and let her know how you feel about her.
Then talk, talk, talk.
Good Luck!
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Ok, i went out with this kid,john, and he was black. MY mother didn't approve of him and there for me and him broke up.
about a month later, he moved =[
I cried for days, but eventually got over it, and can live with out him.
today he came back to ( my town ) to visit or w/e, and we were talking on the computer. on myspace he sent me messages saying hel'll call me, and that he loves me, should I beleive him? and if we meet up like tommorrow should i go for ( it ).. (link)
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I am going to be different and say you treat him as a friend. No sex stuff or anything like that, just friends.
The reason is that he is going to be leaving again. Your mom doesn't like him and you will just wind up being hurt.
Keep him as a friend but look closer to home for a "boyfriend". Find a guy who can take you to dances at school and to the movies. He is just to far away for that. :)
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I'm 13 and my mom is getting on my case about EVERYTHING!!! Now adays...i just wish she would leave me alone. I mean she's always watching over my back when I'm on the internet, asking who I'm talking to when I'm on IM or on the Phone...and to top it off. When the guy I like comes around she just stares and I feel uncomfortable. My question is, how do I keep my mom out of MY buisness?
-Beyond Joking (link)
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Well, I know you won't believe this but you are actually very lucky.
Your mom actually cares what you are up to and keeps an eye on what you are doing. I know its easy to forget but the internet is really not kid friendly in a lot of ways. A lot of kids and even adults have gotten in trouble by being to trusting of people they meet online.
As for her bugging you while on the phone, that may be a little overboard. And she really shouldn't stare at your guy friends and make you uncomfortable.
Those things you need to talk to her about. Let her know how you feel. Tell her it makes you uncomfortable and all that. Just be sure you talk to her when you aren't mad. You want a good conversation not an argument.
Good luck. :)
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I have been dating this guy for over two years. He always express verbally that he loves me and he showers me the appropriate gifts when the occasion calls for it and I do the same. Because of our schedules we see each other about once or twice a week and when we are together we only spend time with each other. We go to movies, dinner, dancing, etc. Now here is the problem. When it comes to family and friend events, I am never invited by him. Either his parents or friends invite me. I feel I should be invited by him and I don’t attend. I have expressed my feelings about this to him. His replay was that I tend to throw temper tantrums, verbally abuse him, and then not return his calls when I am upset with him and once he sees that my attitude has changed he would consider it. Now I have only done this a few time during the course of our relationship and never in public. I do realize that I was wrong and immature and I have apologized. Several months have past since the last incident and I have still not been invited by him. But I was never invited even before the incident. (I have since stop inviting him to my family and friends gathering and now he is mad.) Is this just an excuse? Should I continue to wait and if so how long or do I need to move on? (link)
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Honestly, I think it is really nice that his family would take the time to invite you themselves. It is their home after all.
Next time go when invited and don't make such a big issue of it. Pretty soon they will stop asking.
You wouldn't want them getting the idea that you don't like them, especially if you see a future in your relationship with their son. :)
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Hi again,
Sorry to bug you for more advice but could really do with some right now!!
Are you about to talk to.......? Think I may have just made a rea;;y silly mistake!
(Several times!!!)
If you are about e-Mail me at MelanieHarvey81@hotmail.com and let me know.
Thanks
Mel xxx (link)
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I will email you. Or better yet, karenrickel50@hotmail.com
Have been wondering whats up with you!
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when you are pregnant, how soon will you feel the stomach cramps? and what part of the stomach do you feel them in? Thanks so much for you help. (link)
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You don't have stomach cramps if you are pregnant unless something isn't right.
You do have contractions, which I suppose are like cramps when you are 9 months along and ready to give birth. :)
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Okay, well in my school we have the option of going to CTC our senior year, and i want to go for cosmetology.. its like a technical school i dont know if they are all over or not... But if I'm not at high school for my senior year, what do i do about my credits i need my senior year to graduate? Like english 12, gym 12, and history... all the stuff i have to take every year what do i do because i'll need those credits to graduate won't i? Or do you know if you can get those credits at CTC?
thnankss! (link)
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In a lot of schools the tech classes you take count as credits.
Get with your schools guidance counselor. It is there job to help you figure all this out. They will see to it you have the credits to graduate. :)
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allright im a 13/f
my best friend is a 13/m and... he drinks but i never seen him drink but i was talkin on aim and he seemed like he was drunk the way he was talkin. but i want to know if he really does get drunk or if he was just tryin to impress me or what! see he said to me "why dont you come to my house and get drunk on friday" i was very upset! :( i NEED advice on this
please help me! (cry)! (link)
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It would be hard to tell without seeing him.
Have you tried telling him that this type of thing doesn't impress you any? See if he all of a sudden sobers up?
13 is way to young to start on the drinking. If he actually drinks that much he may have a problem.
Express your being upset about his behavior. If he doesn't stop talking about it then I would tell an adult and have them check into it for you. :)
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All my information for my profile in here get deleted!!!
OKay so what is the code to put links in your prof file (like your friends)?
How do you put spaces between paragraphs?
How do you make words bold??
How do you get hearts???
And were do you people find all theses codes
THANKS ill rate you
(link)
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If you didn't have a valid email address in your profile then your column may have been deleted.
http://www.advicenators.com/faq.php?f=111
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I just started a construction type job and I am the youngest, the smallest, the least experienced, and one of only two women on the crew. I do not have the size or strength to do the heavier stuff so the other female and I do small jobs to make it easier for the men to do large jobs. I pull my weight and the boss is satisfied with me. But the guys are being awfully condescending, perhaps unintentionally, but still annoying. They do things like pat me on the head, arm or back and tell me what a "good little worker" I am. I really resent it, but I don't know how to tell them so without making them angry with me. Should I ignore them (the job only lasts for another few days) or tell them to quit somehow, and if I tell them to quit, how do I do that and still maintain good work relationships with them? (link)
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I think the best way to survive the next few days is with a sense of humor.
If they aren't saying or doing anything really inappropriate just joke along with them. It could be they aren't real sure how to treat you.
If you show signs of it bothering you they will just do it more, if you joke along you will become just one of the "guys". :)
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Ok .. Ive really been wanting this answered but ive been shy.. ive been talking to this guy on the internet.. and @ first he was REALLY rude to me but i just kept playing with him.. funning around.. and well now.. hes liike ive never fallen inlove withanyone and he told me he fell in love with me.. and well we have this thing.. wen he doesnt want to tell me something.. we start a story type thing using "she" and "he" ex: "he hugs her and kisses her on the cheek" well .. ok he lives in alabama... and im really wanting to kno if u shud stop talking to him or not. and hes scared to show me his pictures because his parents beet him .. so he has scars... so i told him i didnt care.. and not hes really shy... well in the begging hes like NO ONE BREAKS MY LEVELS... and i was like wtf.. and he said the lower levels u r the better and so the first days i was on level 9 billion... now sumhow... it has been drasticly dropping.. and i was kinda jealous because he talks about this gilr names shadow an awful lot.. but i shudnt be.. ok just please help me !!! XD
Do i keep talking to him... what do i do? oh yeah .. ps IM 14....and a girl (link)
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Realistically you aren't going to be more than friends for a while. That doesn't mean you can't keep talking to him and getting to know each other.
If he lives a ways away from you he won't be able to go to school dances with you or go out on dates...things like that. So you can't really be boyfriend/girlfriend at the moment. You can still be friends though and you never know what might happen in the future.
So, if you really like this guy, stay friends and keep talking. Just don't expect it to seem like a romance because it just can't be right now. You can't just stay home alone and wait to meet. You're much to young for that yet. :)
*****note added in response to feedback**********
It could be he is trying to engage you in some kinky cyber sex story telling. If you aren't comfortable with that then tell him you don't like it. Just say you want to be friends but that you just aren't into that kind of thing. :)
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