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Life is an adventure but Life doesn't come with user manuals for everything. School subjects do little to prepare us. Its no wonder we all need helpful advice sometimes. Blessings to you!

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My hair is diry blond and shoulder length like g hannelui'so. However my hair is FRIZZY. I take a shower in the morning and even tried to blow dry it straight today. ITS NOT WORKING. I don't want to have to straighten it every day, so do you know any tricks that'll keep hair straight all day . Thanks!

If born with frizzy hair, a hair relaxer may work. Since I can't tell you what's on the market for hair care supplies in your area so you may want to check with any girlfriends who are black and straighten their hair. Many hair relaxers are very harsh, and can burn the scalp and hurt the hair. But there should be at least one if not two brands that are more natural and naturally relax the hair strands. Applying heat straighteners only hurts the hair.
If you weren't born with frizzy hair and it just became that way over time, it could be due to messing with it too much, like washing daily, too many perms or colorings, or doing so too often, blow drying hot air, other heated elements applied to hair, a poor nutritional diet can affect the health of hair. Find a product that naturally relaxes the hair and unless you have a problem with oily roots, stop using shampoo daily. Go for once every 3 days. I sometimes go 4 or 5 days, inbetween my hair simply gets washed with water, I now have healthier hair than I've had ever in my life and longer hair than I've ever had. Of course, I am no professional, so you could always try asking at a hair salon what the best care for your type of hair is.

‪My dad sucks at driving, but you can't tell him that because he'll argue that he's the greatest driver you'll ever meet. To him, a good driver is someone who can maneuver the car well an do cool tricks. To me, and I hope to anyone else, a good driver is someone who is careful, follows the rules of the road, and cares more about safety than being cool.

My dad speeds, takes annoyingly hard turns, slams on the gas and on the brakes, has bad road rage, and texts while driving. He'll also take his eyes off the road to look at the passengers in the car while he talks to them. Once, he fell asleep while driving and when my sister woke him up, he yelled at her, "What? I was sleeping!"

He says that the only other person he knows who was better at driving than he is was my uncle who died in a car accident before I was born. That accident was not completely his fault, but it was partially.

Before that though, he was hated by most of our town for another accident he caused. He was trying to pass a car, but when he got in the next lane to do so, there was a car coming down that lane in the opposite direction. He didn't have much time to pass the car in front of him before he hit the car in the next lane, so the safe thing to do would have been to pull back over into his own lane. Instead of doing that though, he floored it and hit the other car head on. The woman in the car was a mother to small children. She was sent to the hospital where she was told to stay in bed due to a blood clot that the accident caused. She didn't obey the order and got up, which caused the blood clot to break and the woman to die.

People blamed my uncle, but he took no responsibility for it. My dad and grandparents saw no reason why he should. People wrote my grandparents letters saying that if they were good people, they'd help that woman's children I guess by giving them money, but they wouldn't do it. They said that it was the woman's own fault for getting up. The thing is though, that it never would have happened if he hadn't pulled something stupid and caused that accident.

I can't explain what it says to me that my grandparents wouldn't help that woman's kids and that they and my dad don't see any fault my uncle has in her death. It just makes me disappointed in them and it scares me because they don't seem to have learned anything from the accident. I can totally see my dad doing something like what my uncle did someday. He's so convinced that my uncle was such a great driver that he hasn't learned anything from either accident (that one or the one he died in). At least not what he should have learned.

How do I tell my dad that he needs to work on his driving an that he shouldn't follow my uncle's examples without sounding like a total @$$ hole?

And where is mom in all of this? Does she drive at all? Isn't she concerned about Dad's behavior in driving? The issue is not that you'd be an a$$hole for telling him you're not comfortable with him driving you around like that. He is an a$$hole for behaving like that. And I'll bet he does that in many other areas of life, not just driving, but his behavior is most obvious to you when he drives. The road rage you mention is the clue. It is affecting other areas of his life, I can guarantee that. When you get a fever which indicates that something is wrong inside, there's a bug or illness, you don't get just a fever on one leg or one hand or just the head, the fever is there in all areas of your body. If Dad has rage coming to the surface in driving, the anger is there in other areas. Your dad needs counseling
If Mom won't stand up to him, it's probably because he verbally abuses or controls her and she has chosen to avoid confrontations by not saying anything. When one parent is way out of line it take the other parent to look after the welfare of the children. That would be Mom. Talk to her of your concerns. If she won't do something about changing things and you feel your life is in danger every time you get into the car, then you need to reach out to someone outside the family. We are too far removed from you to be able to do anything other than advise you what to do.Perhaps you have a couple of really caring adult relatives, more like you, who would see reckless driving as endangerment to you and help speak on your behalf to authorities. Or maybe you have a church pastor you can talk to. Often they have to deal with the ugly realities of life, even in the lives of their church members. Just because someone attends church doesn't mean they've got it right. Or you could talk with the school counselor and they could alert authorities to look into it.

If Dad wants to drive that way when alone, thats his business. As father he is responsible for your safety and welfare. He is not driving in a way that is responsible. As far as I know texting or talking on cell phones is now illegal where I live and probably is in many of not all the states.

In the laws of the land, there is such a thing as Reckless Endangerment of a child. Driving while intoxicated is one. Only a lawyer can determine if your Dads driving falls under the same law of reckless endangerment of a child. If your Dad is the type of person I think he is by how you describe him and how highly he thinks of and models himself after an uncle who indirectly killed a person through reckless driving, then there is nothing you can say to get through to him. He needs more intervention than just wife or kids asking him to stop in a 'nice way'. For him, there is no nice way to say anything because in his mind he is always right. My ex husband always felt he was right and it ends up he has undiagnosed mental illness. I could not tell him to go see a counselor. No one can force him to change, but the law can protect children in a bad situation and must take seriously any call that comes in to them. One such agency is CPS.(Child Proctective Services.) Many kids who need help don't get it because there has to be an obvious witness-able case of neglect or endangerment that a CPS representative can see if they make a surprise visit to the house. In your case, it occurs in the car, so I am not sure what any person looking into it can come up with. But at least you can start. If you're old enough to have your own cell phone and Dad is driving recklessly, the only other thing I can think of is to find out ahead if your local countys sheriffs office has an anonymous texting number you can text to. Or any number for that matter. And then text them of your concerns. You may want to have the license plate memorized so you can give it to them with description of the vehicle you are in. This may be the best way to get him to change or at least have proof of reckless endangerment of you and your siblings is to have proof like this.Here's a link to one Sheriff's office that started doing this back in 2009. I can't say its like that all over the US so check from home sometimes on your own.

http://www.capemaycountyherald.com/article/government/court+house/91988-sheriff%E2%80%99s+office+has+app+anonymous+text+tips

Off the highways would be probably the local polices jurisdiction. You may have to text them instead. No talking calls or Dad will know what you're up to and I don't want you to have to face his anger for exposing him even if due to fear for your life. Its really not just you kids's safety as you well know from what happened in your family's past, that other innocent people could be hit. Even a simple whiplash, rear ending can do more physical damage than one thinks, back and neck problems for life in some cases.
Good luck dear.

Hi. I've answered many questions myself on the subjects of dreams, and of astrology. Now it's beyond argument that cosmic bodies influence the EARTH. The moon demonstrably affects tides, sun-spot activity and solar mass-ejections are shown to influence our atmosphere & weather, solar flares disrupt satelite communications and I believe one of the distant planets conveniently deflects (potentially world-ending if they hit us) asteroids out of our path. (Not sure which planet, and there's certainly loads more examples-but I'm not into cosmology/astro-physics). But I've never been even slightly convinced that us HUMANS are in any way influenced by the rhythms and cycles of the universe. My replies of course, reflect this. Getting to the point, an extensive project, by a number of well-respected psychologists was published recently. It has some very strong evidence that during periods of the full moon dream activity tends to increase, and the content of the dreams seems more random and bizarre. Also sleep patterns tend to become disrupted (generally, more difficult to 'get to sleep' and awaking earlier). A report by psychologists does not of course suggest reasons WHY. It's the usual probing into human nature and behavioural patterns. I'd love to hear what the panel of intelligent and free-thinkg columnists make of this. It's a bit of a mind-bomb for me. I have no idea how this known-to-be-lifeless, inert (though I admit very beautiful) lump of rock can possibly influence our dreams? Possibly electro-magnetic/electro-motive forces, my only vague idea? But does simple magnetism (in effect) make us dream more vividly? I wouldn't have thought so?? Thanks in advance for any thoughts, theories or ponderings any might share with me. CJB

Do animals respond to the influence of the Moon?

The short answer is yes, they do, and science has recorded thousands of examples showing a positive correlation between animal behavior (this includes human behavior) and the moon. Science however has not explained the mechanism that triggers this behavior; or more simply exactly how the moon causes this influence.
My theory is that our bodies mainly being comprised of water and the fact that the moon has an effect on the flow of water as demonstrated by high and low tides at the beach would seem to be most logical. Take a look at the following site and the chart that explains all the ways that water is needed in our bodies.
http://water.usgs.gov/edu/propertyyou.html

If the normal flow of any liquids in our body are being affected by the moon like tidal waters, then it would be a daily thing. Then we only need to figure out why those are felt stronger on a full moon. And heres a link to explain why:

http://home.hiwaay.net/~krcool/Astro/moon/moontides/

As you can see, during a Full moon, the reason people and animal are affected in positive and negative ways stronger than other times of the month is because the Moon has help. Its not only the gravitational pull of the Moon at this point but the Sun is in alignment with the Moon adding Solar gravitional pull as well, so I guess you could call it a "gravitational overload" on living things.
Hopes this gives you more understanding on the subject.

I'm female. Okay so I'm in high school right now. My final year. Prom is coming up soon...we'll not really soon but you know how it is. I'm going with a guy I find really attractive. On the night I know it might lead to us getting physical( p.s we're not dating) because he did tell me a lonnnng time prior that he really likes me. He's one of my best friends so I know he won't bullshit me. He confides in me and I know of his past relationships. He's not a virgin(but I am). We talked about a relationship but I that's not going to happen because I dated one of his close friends. The thing is on the night it might lead to us wanting to get physical. And I don't know if I should do it. I want to experience it finally because I'm very curious. He makes it seem so interesting. But should I wait for it to be with someone more special? I don't want to be in a relationship with him but I'm still curious. Any advice

I agree with all the reasoning of Drewb. So rather than rehash what he already said, I will go on to pick out a couple more things for you to think upon.

I want you to ask yourself 'why' you think prom night might lead to getting physical. Logically, I can't see the reasoning why one night over the other would have any more influence. Here I believe you are fantasizing and considering the fantasies as already being reality. Learn how to keep your fantasies in the make believe realm, and reality in the real world realm. Negative thinking can also lead us down the wrong path. One fear, worry or negative thought can lead to another and another until we have an entire scenerio or story rolling around in our minds. Its people who are able to do this well who are authors of best selling novels but they know the difference between the fictions in their head and reality. It's okay if a fantasy feels real, cus thats normal...part of our sexuality is a mind that is able to come up with all sorts of fantasies regarding sex and that helps enhance our sexual responses and experiences. The reason it works? Well the mind is known to be the biggest sexual organ we have...a reason romance novels are so popular with women and Playboy or Penthouse is so popular with men.

Now on to the next: You said," We talked about a relationship but that's not going to happen because I dated one of his close friends."

Exactly in whose mind is this a problem or issue? And why? I don't need you to answer me, answer to yourself. Just because girls feel odd dating a girlfriends ex boyfriend and feel they need to ask "permission" to do so. Since when do people have such 'ownership rights' over a person they are no longer dating. The idea is logically not sound at all. So what it probably boils down to is fearing that there'd be issues with jealousy? Why, if one person doesnt work out to be the best person for you, why should it prevent a close friend from forming possibly the best romantic relationship ever.
Did you know that one of the main ways people find their marriage partner is through getting introduced to someone who is close friends of a person they used to date? AND, the ex dating partner is actually happy for both of you.

On to the next: Willpower. Ever hear of that word? Willpower is used in many areas of our lives, its something that helps us to quit a bad habit like binge eating or smoking, instead of caving in to our cravings. The same goes for sex. Your body may be getting to the point where it no longer wants to wait to have sex. Theres something to be said about taking care of sexual urges without using a partner until you have the right one. Masturbation goes a long way towards helping with this. However, no matter how badly you feel the need to connect sexually with a live male body, the important thing is that it be the right body, that you both have deep feelings for each other and acknowledge those feelings. You are not at that point of both having deep feelings, with your prom date friend.

Or are you? and you just don't realize it? Some male/female best friends end up being the perfect long term/life long partners for each other because the one important factor of being best friends is already there. However equally important is having that spark between you. Most assume it hits you only in the beginning, when you see the person, are attracted and feel wild feelings of desire in their presence. Just because it didn't start that way doesnt mean that over time that a little ember can't become a blazing fire. In fact this is the main reason some people don't make the move to exploring if they have stronger feelings for each other now. I am married and my body isn't sensing my husband 100% of the time on a romantic level. We interact the majority of time on a best friend level, but when one of us initiates something, it quickly changes to a romantic or sexual one. The sexual aspect won't be prominent all the time. It would be the same for friends just starting out.

If you can get past any excuses in your mind why not to explore this aspect, then I think you should give it a try. He has feelings towards you. You won't know until you try if it feels right to kiss and touch each other in more flirty and intimate ways like running your fingers through each others hair.
To explore by having full blown sex on prom night is not the best way to go. Get it straight in your head first. Tell him you're not sure yet if the two of you can develop the romance side of the relationship, and you're not making a promise or commitment to him by trying but you are game to try and see if that sits well with him. I am sure he'll be okay with it. There is a chance the two of you won't both feel that chemistry. You'll know when you're feeling it and if you're not. But he'll be willing to try in case there is a chance that it IS there.

If so, then it would be a good thing to explore that now in small ways, with kissing and the type of touching that would help to tell you if theres anything more to this. Then later, if both of you want to share the sex experience together, You can do the right thing, go in to get on birth control (ie planned Parenthood) and make sure it will be built up in your system before 'doing it'. It doesn't have to happen on Prom night and can wait until after. Just make sure that you both are fully ready and have feelings for each other. Cus if you don't, you have no business having sex with him to begin with.

Hii ... 15F!*
So I'm crazy inlove with this guy. But he had a gf. They broke up and we held movie night and I invited him. Whe stated cuddeling and he kissed me on "̮м̣̣̣̥γ̥"̮ hand and head and whe kissed and french kissed. Whe held hands. There was another guy just sitting loanly so I asked him to come sit by me and "̮м̣̣̣̥γ̥"̮ crush said he can. But before we took them home the guy(who sat next to me) wantes to give me a hug. And then "̮м̣̣̣̥γ̥"̮ crush said no. Does this mean he likes me??

When you invited him to a movie night, his acceptance was an indication that he was at least attracted to you. The fact that he got close with you real quick this first time together could mean that he has feelings for you too, or he is a guy who is playing games with girls. Watch for it and you should soon know his true colors.
Do you even know the "whys" behind his break up with his ex? The story he tells is going to be only one side. If you know the other girl and see problems later, you might go ask her if she experienced the same.

Two common reasons a teen guy is playing with a girl is wanting to gratify himself sexually and all he wants is into the girls pants. It could be just hormones but sometimes when a guy on a first meet is cuddling, touching and kissing a girl, he's trying to speed up getting to the point of having sex. the reasons guys break up with a girl they only went after for sex is when they sense shes developed too deep feelings for him or become too clingy and is pressuring him to do other 'couple' things together besides just the sex.
The other problem is a guy whose ego gets a boost and they are addicted to the feeling of triumph in the chase. He may go after a girl, courting her until she is finally deeply hooked but now that she's hooked, the thrill he gets from the chase is over and he craves that thrill of the chase stage so he breaks up and goes to the next.
Just kissing a guy doesn't mean that you have made a commitment to be his girlfriend and date him exclusively. However most teens don't seem to get that. So he technically has NO say over what you decide to do because it's not a joint decision since you are not an "official couple". A girl gets so excited over the attention of a boy that she can fail to see if he is acting like he has 'ownership of you' and gives his permission or not and basically controls you. If you allow a guy to control your moves, it will turn out badly for the relationship. All males respond better to females who had strict boundaries of what she will and won't tolerate, knows what she wants, has inner confidence and speaks up and wont take sH*t and gives him ultimatums if he tries.
First, crush boy "gives his okay" for another guy to come sit by you. That was your decision only, not for crush boy to give his approval to or for you to ask for his approval of. When the other boy wanted a hug from you, that again was your choice to give not his to say no to. Most teens have a self image problems, guys included and it could be his immaturity and confidence issues that made him forbid you hugging someone else. It may be nothing at all, or it could be the first signs of a controlling personality and abusive behaviors.
So does he like you because he said NO? There's no way to tell. He could have said no simply because he felt jealous and incorrectly assumed, even though you crush on him too, that you both had the type of relationship and commitments to each other that would make interacting in such ways with someone else feel inappropriate. I will not say that hugging another guy ever, even if you're married is wrong, because it depends on the situation. A guys or gals natural personality may be friendly and touch and hug ALL people consistantly, not just single you out. Its part of who they are and thus mean nothing as far as flirting or cheating. I would safely say he is "attracted" to you. But he hasn't spent enough quality time getting to know you and do stuff other than cuddling and kissing to really know if he likes you. You can't know from looking at a vegetable if you like it right? You have to taste it. You may not like it plain but may like it in several different recipes. Its like that with relationships. Best relationships are built on two things: Attraction and Friendship. You know by his reactions that he feels attraction. Now you wait to see if he desires to get to know you as deeply or deeper than your girlfriends do. If he's not interested in being best friends also, then his attraction is only skin deep, just driven by the hormones to want to explore sexually. And that is okay as long as thats all you want to. Just don't get your hopes up that this means he has the same deep feelings that you may have. And be careful, if this goes much beyond kissing and petting, you'll want to go to Planned Parenthood and get on birth control

I love him soo much and I'm 9 month older then him. When we would have convo, I would constantly remind that he's younger than me and I'm giving a hint of like friend-zoning him but ik in myself that I love him so much. Btw i forgot to mention that he's just my cyber crush that I know for like a year. We never see each other in person. He's really good and nice and haven't had a gf before, me too. And he keeps on going to the topic leading to my bf which i don't have, so we discuss about. His giving a hint that she likes me and even said she love me but in just a joke way. i told him I like him but as friend. But omg i want him to be my bf. i think it's good to have LDR relationship coz it's not destroying my studies. so any help pls?

Sounds like we have 3 subjects to touch on: age difference, friend zoning, and cyber only boyfriends.

I know these are all wrapped up in one ball of wax in this situation, but in your future, you may come up against each of these in separate situations so thats why I am breaking them down.

Age: Whether this CF (cyber friend) is exactly your age, older or younger, shouldn't matter. 9 months is not a big gap anyway. The rule when I was growing up was I couldn't enter school if I turned 5 shortly after school started so I had a wait another whole year. That puts kids who turn a year older in late Sept. Oct in a position of always being older than most their classmates. That is normal and to be expected. If maturity of the person is an issue in your mind, then base it strictly on their maturity, not age. Although some teens can be really mature, the pre frontal cortex of the brains isn't truly done growing until our mid twenties and that is one big cause of immaturity in teens.There are reports that will tell you females dont mature until age 30 and some guys until as late as late 30's.
So the only other reason I can think of is how it looks. There are no societal rules that one partner can't be a vastly different age than the other. Age is just a number. Some people look alot older than their age, some a lot younger. This doesn't become obvious until one partner is about 10 years or more difference in age. Older people dont seem to worry about chronological age, just the young people seem tothe pre frontal cortex responsible for good decision husband is 13 months younger than me. It's never been an issue. With your CF, no one is going to know but I want you to really think about how important age is or isn't for the future. If you met the perfect man to marry some day, would you reject him because he was 2 years younger? What really matters is if the guy treats you right, you have things in common and feel that spark together. That should always have a greater importance in any relationship than your age.

Next topic, friend zoning: It is an unfortunate thing that this happens to many guys. While I will admit that there are males who have the best friend thing going with a girl and truly do not feel any romantic spark, it is more common that a male whom the girl considers to be "just a friend" actually has always had those feelings for her or the feelings developed over time but he is willing to take whatever he can get because he's in love with her and hopes she one day will feel the same. Why does this happen? Usually people are looking to feel hit by some big powerful feelings of attraction and desire for a person when they first lay eyes on them. If it's not there but they have lots in common, they become friends. Usually its only one person who doesnt feel that spark but it eventually develops slowly over time. Word of caution: Discovering this 'chemistry or spark' for each other in common doesnt happen in cyber or long distance. It is exactly a chemical thing, the two individuals pheromones are a great match. You can't assume it will be there unless you have an "in person" relationship.

And lastly my feelings about Cyber/LDR. I have experienced it all, meeting someone in Cyber and then brief meeting in person and back to do an LDR due to responsibilities in our own areas and can't relocate, meeting in cyber but never meeting in person or meeting in cyber on dating sites locally, and being cyber only short term before meeting in person. What I have discovered is that Cyber is a poor substitute for the real thing. It is one dimensional, the computer screen only, it is too easy to hide something about oneself from the other or to lie. There is no way for the other person to ever find out unless you were ever to take the relationship to real life. I've had male CF's long term whom I never met in real life and just considered them an online penpal. What happens over time in my mind with any CF, even short term ones like local ones for dating, is that my mind would imagine and create a fantasy to fill in the area's I didn't know, like how it will feel when they even just touch my hand. Then we meet in person and it all feels wrong, nothing at all like I imagined. It could be the total opposite and he feels repulsive to me rather than the guy I so badly wanted to meet. Or I caught many who had lied about who they were. There also isn't a chance for trust to build online because you aren't there in person to gauge whether the person is being truthful or putting up a smoke screen. Its much harder to hide something in real life.

I understand wanting a boyfriend badly. But choosing someone on line to consider a boyfriend is not going to teach you all the things you need to learn about relationships and dating because it is so very limited. Until you find the partner you want to stick with long term or for life, all your experiences with guys through the arena of "dating" is going to help shape your ideas of and selection of the right guy. So this means you will at times run into the 'wrong' guy or end up in a mismatched relationship for a while until you break up. It's all a learning experience. However, for a first dating boyfriend/girlfriend thing in cyber, you are vastly limiting your abilities to really learn and experience things. A relationship like that is mostly fantasy. Most of us do not need to work on our imagination or being able to fantasize but we need to learn how to understand the opposite sex and the dating do's and don't and discover what we actually like in a person and we won't get that if we are not able to compare in some way. So dating to discover these things is good and may include dating who ever asks, several perhaps at the same time, just be clear that you are still in search mode for who you want to commit to being in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship with. Don't restrict yourself to dating one person exclusively until you discover if they are perfect for you or not...its a waste of time otherwise and keeps you off limits to a possible guy who might have been a way better choice. So choosing to become a serious girlfriend with a CF, is doing the same only it's worse, you will not learn the things you can learn in person from dating. the issue is not his age, it's the whole cyber thing to begin with. Since the odds are against you for this guy ever becoming a fulfulling real life relationship, its better to keep him at just a friendship level. If this guy lives in the same city, just not the same school, find out if its okay with the parents to have him come visit on the weekend. Thats the smarter thing to do. If you live too far apart, keep it as friends only on line and start dating real guys. Don't miss out on the fun of your teen years dating and going to dances with guys because of a CF that you are choosing to restrict yourself to. Is it easy to develop feelings for a CF and feel like you love them? Yes, it is. I have felt it, but it sure as heck wasn't the same with any I met out of dozens when face to face finally. Only one such guy I met after 10 days of daily online and phone with him turned out to be the perfect guy and is now my husband of about 5 years.

theres this guy i like and he steals some glances at me sometimes and smiles at times and talks to me here and there what are 5 ways tto know he likes me?

You've already mentioned 3 things a guy does when interested in a girl. I have a link that will give you more than 5 ways to know, there are 24. All of them I know of and would type it out but its' much faster and easier to give you the site to look up yourself. And yes, from experience, it is all very true.
http://mandecoder.com/24-signs-a-guy-likes-you-decoding-his-body-language

I broke up with my boyfriend today and he seemed kinda sad about it. He's a mostly quiet person... But I didn't really know how to break up with him, but I kinda lied to him (Yes, I know it was bad, but I wasn't thinking and I was scared). I told him that I got in trouble for dating him and that we should just stay friends. He asked who got me in trouble and I just didn't answer. He also said "Wow I wanna shoot whoever did that" and that kinda got me scared... He asked if it was my parents then said "No I wouldn't do that"... But like I don't know if he was just upset or actually meant it. He's a sweet guy so I wouldn't think he would do that, but like I don't want there to be like a school shooting... I'm a VERY paranoid person so I could just be overthinking this, but what do you guys think?
Also, please don't tell me to tell like an adult about this because it could probably just be nothing but I don't want to be wrong either.

If you said so today, and regret saying it now, there's still time left in the day to call and tell him you lied and why. Just come even. He may be hurt of course, but it is better to have someones respect if not friendshp. Being honest goes a long way to saying something about your character.

I know, this is hard to do, scary too. But very emotional things that people come across in life will bring emotional statements like, "The person who did that should be shot, or should be hung upside down from their ankles, or should have their tongue cut out, be castrated, be beaten up. I have heard many other creative expressions all nothing more than a way for the speaker to say something to show how strongly they feel about the act, in your case 'someone getting you in trouble', while we feel strongly about what we perceive as an injustice whether done to us or someone else, there are very few people who would ever dream of doing such a thing as shooting someone. The news you listen to daily has reports more bad than good stuff so you are led to believe that every school is in danger of a shooting occuring on a yearly basis for each. Yes, you are being paranoid. Time to take a break from following the media so closely.

This one boy in my class is always being rude to me. When I sing, or dance, he groans, and corrects me, and mocks me, and points out everything I did wrong. He also told me my hair is notty and I have a rash on my face. What do I do?

I gather that no one else is treating you this way and saying these things. You only mentioned the one boy not a bunch of people. If its just him acting this way, theres a good chance that whether he's aware or not, that he is attracted to/interested in you.
I know, I know....doesnt sound like the way a guy would act if he was truly interested. He would be the opposite right? Like smiling, being sweet, and when he talks, its all compliments and things to encourage you and build you up, not tear you down.
Depending on his age and maturity level, that is actually what boys will do. Why? I can't say. Maybe their social abilities are behind those of a girl at a certain age?
What you might try next time he pays attention to you in a negative way is to say, "Brian, this is not the right way to make a good impression on a girl you are attracted to or crushing on. Its a known fact that Guys only go out of their way to pay attention to a girl they are attracted to. You would greaten your chances at dating a girl if you were to smile and compliment her instead, show interest in what she likes to do and find ways to support her and build her up."

He may be embarrassed at having been caught and deny it. Or he may change and start treating you nicely. Either way, there's a good chance that his behavior might change if you say something to that effect. The only way he'd continue on as before is if he has shown to have a behavioral problems in other areas at school as well. In this case, you could talk to your teacher about him behavior.

I am a seventeen year old girl with low self esteem problems yet not afraid to admit it - it's a free country, I'll have to deal with that later. My problem here is that I can't talk about this with anybody from home or school - it'll probably end up offending somebody in the long run. That's how unfortunately nice I can be. I'm a senior - obviously - and my class decided to make a play based on a novel we read in our Spanish class. The actors were picked - mind you, there weren't that many characters for us to fill, being that there were barely fifteen characters and fifty six students in our class. The teacher decided to make a grade, so everybody had to participate one way or another.

There were the general staff that kept order during the play, publicists that took care of...well making the play public and selling the tickets, those that handled all the make up and wardrobes of each character, the actors, and...the scenographers. I volunteered to be part of that crew along with thirteen other students. The reason why I did this was because I love art and it's very fun for me. However...there were many inconveniences on the way.

- We had to make a script out of the novel - at first it was teacher's job because she said she WOULD do it, but then she gave the job to the students. A little too late, which caused problems for all of us. No script, meant no solid guide for the actors. No script, meant no scenography, which meant that Light and Sound Effects rushed ME, to give them the scenography so they could do their stuff.
- Actors are always treated like the Queens and Kings of the show because if they decide to quit we're all hopelessly doomed.
- Our teacher got into a lot of stress because she was too late for everything - which wasn't OUR fault at all - and she started developing a more sour and mandatory attitude towards everybody, ESPECIALLY scenography. During the first official practice she was yelling at us because a lot of the utility was missing. Guess who's fault really was that they were missing? The actors kicked and pushed all of our boxes in their hurry to improvise, but do they get a berating? No, of course not, they were doing their job. We're the irresponsible ones as always.

We have to do the play three times, two down, one to go. I am stressed in so many ways you can't even imagine - I don't just have the physical and emotional stress of getting yelled at by my teacher and "friends", but I also have to worry about school work, work with my parents and university. A few days ago I even had low presion - my chest felt so cramped I couldn't move around a lot.

I just needed to get all of that off my chest. I can't confide in anybody and anybody I DO confide in will ignore me and never listen to a word. I'm pretty much invisible to my fellow classmates, always have been. So, if anybody has any kind of suggestion, advice, relaxing treatment, I'm listening - well, reading.

So after all you said, all you want is a way to get rid of feeling stressed, ways to deal with it? Am I right? If so, keep reading cus I have a set of things for you to do that are easy, known to help with depression, let alone stress which can lead to depression.
When a person is stressed, their body will use up more Neurotransmitters to help them cope with the stress. Add in too much stress and it all gets used up faster than the body can naturally bring the reserve levels of NTs back up. When they are low to non existant for too long, thats what we refer to as being 'depressed'. Its depressed levels of what your body needs to cope with the stress.
Here's an article that explains it all without my having to type it out for you. Then I will give you the tips on what to do to help bring up those NT levels and hormones quickly.

http://www.integrativepsychiatry.net/neurotransmitter.html

Yes, there is something you can do that will instantly jump start your body into creating more NT's and feel good hormones. I came across a article in a blog once on the internet that explains it well. When one of my daughters got depressed after a 2nd boyfriend broke up with her, it was real bad this time and she was unable to bounce back. I told her what to do but hey, it's just mom, what does she know, right? So through her job, she went for her one free visit to a psychologist who told her everything she could do herself since she would be unable to come in for sessions, and the list he gave her is exactly what I came across.
It's going to sound crazy, really silly and not believable but you're not going to get results if you don't trust me enough to give it a try, cus what have you got to lose, as silly as it makes you feel.

1. Find reasons to laugh. Laughter is good medicine for a reason. It helps raise these low levels. So watch your favorite comedies, get on the net and find comedy acts to watch. Talking about the hard belly ache laughter here.

2. Listen to uplifting music. I can't say what is uplifting to you but it's going to be something you've always felt when hearing a certain melody, its not the lyrics that count, its the sound. What you're looking for is listening to the songs that make your heart feel light as a balloon as if it were about to float out of your chest. A melody that does it for me is "Clocks" by Coldplay. I have a small collection of songs I play and sing along to whenever I begin to feel a stressed feeling coming on, which warns me my levels are too low.

3. This brings me to the next point--singing. Singing helps to raise those NTs and hormones. So don't just listen to music, sing along.

4. Movement...action is important. Think of how many people you've heard of who lack energy, want to stay in bed all day and do nothing when severely depressed. Doing nothing will only keep a person stuck so doing the opposite, movement will help. It is suggested that a person walk, jog, do exercise or a more fun version of movement, dancing. So just move to the music. There's that music again. Its all tied together as you can see. I have tried skipping, like a little kid would do. Hadn't done it since I was a kid. Imagine a woman in her 50's skipping down the street. I felt silly but as I continued, I began to laugh hilariously at myself and I feel the stress just melt off instantly.

5. Give hugs and get hugs. Have you heard of hugging therapy? Bet you haven't. But in recent years it is becoming more popular. A true prolonged bear hug with another person is much needed to help keep the levels up. One hug per day won't do. It is suggested that around 8 per day will help. So...give a hug and you automatically recieve one. Can't think of anyone you like enough to give a hug to? Hug a stranger.

* The first five are things that will have the quickest effects. Here are more

6. Meditate. This means you're taking time to let your mind relax, not focus on your problems or tasks to be done. This takes some practice to do well and learn how to stop your subconscious mind from just constantly wandering off to dwell on things that rob you of your peace.

7. Learn to forgive. Did you know that when you hold a grudge or hold on to your anger, you are
putting a huge energetic tax on your system? Think of it like picking up a heavy weight and having to carry it around with you all the time. As long as we focus on what was done to us from a negative viewpoint instead of finding the ability to forgive, we keep reliving the experiences as a victim rather than remembering them as an overcomer.

8. Being Grateful/Thankful. Gratitude is one of the highest states you can achieve. No matter what’s going on in your life, you can find something for which to be grateful. Even when something terrible has happened to you, chose to find the blessing or positive point in the situation. Such as: "I am grateful to the people who were challenging to me today because it gave me the
opportunity to grow." And it could be something simple as "I am grateful to have the warmest, coziest bathrobe in the world."

The last three tend to have something to do with our thoughts and our brain. If these 3 are not addressed in your life, then all the relief you find with the first 5 steps will be dropped down to lower levels again. So learning to work on the last three as becoming a part of who you are will help greatly.

You should now understand what it means when the NTs and hormones are at critically low levels for you to be able to function normally. If not, think of it like a car low on oil to lubricate the parts. You can make the engine freeze up and ruin it. The low levels in a cars oil could be due to an oil leak and a check up for the car would reveal that.
Its just the same for a human. To make a comparison, the oil leak would be like a medical issue contributing to the problem. Just as a cars oil will get used up in the daily functioning on the road, and need to be replaced regularly, so it is with us, we actually need daily if not every other day techniques used to raise our levels again as they get used up. Unfortunately this is not taught to humans at all at any point in their life. Depression is just the humans 'indicator light' saying that 'their oil' is low.

God, I'm so stupid. I don't even know how to navigate this site. After I got an answer, I don't know what to click on to post another quetion. I just forwarded a question by accident to tech support. God, I'm SO STUPID. I SHOULDN'T BE ALLOWED TO LIVE. (this was my next question): I know other people have problems and there are many injustices going on in the world, but I've tried everything. I'm 3 mos. behind in rent. My daughter was paying my rent but she cut me off without any notice and I just can't make it anymore. I'm on disability but only get $700 a month. I can barely live on that let alone get caught up. I've been diagnosed with agoraphobia, ptsd and bipolar 2. I have absolutely nobody in my life. I'm 48 and have no friends, no family, nothing to live for. I tried to kill myself about a mo ago. My son called the police and a bunch showed up at my door. They took me to a Crisis Clinic but I was there about an hour and no doctor or anybody came to talk to me so I left. I called a suicide hotline number and was put on hold everytime I called. I feel like God is telling me it's time to go. I've been literally pulling my hair out. My bathroom floor is covered in hair. I'm getting older and uglier. Nobody will ever want me.

You mention being diagnosed with all those things but not that you are getting treatment for them. I am sure that $700 a month won't cover you paying out of pocket i for medication or seeing a doctor. I used to be a caregiver of mentally disabled adults. Through the state, there are agencies, not always easy to find, usually you need the help of a professional to get you hooked up with the right agencies, cus I was responsible for taking them to their mental health appointments, to Department of Social and Health services to get food stamps or signed up for other programs, they even had a once a week "Womens group" for people suffering from these types of issues to qualify attending. And it is hard for them because they all arrive acting afraid, anti social and over time warm up and make friends. As the caregiver, I was the one who put the most effort into making sure that they had the help of all agencies who could possibly help and that you qualify for.
You do realize you mentioned having no family but you also mention a daughter and a son in your story. So you do have family. However they are young and are not going to have any idea how to properly find help for you let alone a clue where to start.
YOur entire letter sounds like the talk of someone very depressed. When depressed a person is not going to be able to help themselves very well. But I don't see as that you have a choice but to pull yourself up by the boot straps and start making calls and checking into where you can get hooked up with a multitude of agencies to piece together to make a more comfortable life with a feeling of purpose to it. Unless you know an adult older than your children who'd be happy to volunteer to help you look into it, you'll have to do it. Call your DSHS. In your state it may not be combined but separate such as Dept of Social services and Dept. of Health services, there should also be a Housing authority for those on low income to get into a low rent place and there is usually a long waiting list so the sooner you get hooked up with them, the better. The power company would lesson my clients power bill if she went in person each month to ask for her bill to be lowered due to her low income and they did that. So check in with the power company.
There is mental health help available for people who need it. While it may not be the greatest, it is a once a month or twice a month or weekly appointment with a counselor and then once a month with the psychiatrist to see if your medications work or you need to try something else. I took someone once a week, thats how often they needed to see her. The worst problem here is not getting good help but not getting a consistant counselor you are familiar with. those finishing schooling and needing job experience go through these state mental health agencies like clockwork, changing every 3 to 6 months so you're always treated by someone new. But from what I saw on the meetings I was allowed in on, they were doing a great job. Once you are hooked in to the system and have an assigned social services counselor, that person will help to steer you towards social programs for other low income people with mental issues.

Its hard to attract friends when a person isn't confident and happy. Having a negative outlook and acting pessimistic is a downer and rubs off easily on others and can affect the moods of happier people, mostly why people tend to unknowingly avoid someone in your position. Negative energy will repel people. I understand you can't help it being like that right now but I can't imagine that you have tried everything.

Your statement of being so stupid you shouldnt be allowed to live means you are having issues with negative thoughts. You have a right to have them, isnt that so? But the thing about negative thoughts is that where you allow one to linger, another will come along and then more until your mind is so filled with so many negative thoughts that they connect to form stories and scenerio's in your mind that play over and over and the negativity of them brings down your level of feeling hope and depression sets in among other things. Psychologists have written books about this problem. I like how one called it Stinking Thinking. I have a friend who was a counselor in his Army days. He realized he suffered from depression but no one took him seriously because he was a counselor. His life went down hill until he ended up in the middle of the desert wanting to kill himself. Somehow his inner voice told him not to give up. He went home to find that his wife had got hold of a psychologist who would see him. He taught the same thing of capturing the one negative thought and replacing it immediately with a positive one. That type of counseling is what my friend says changed his life around.
And yet there he was, at the point of wanting to commit suicide when the solution was stumbled upon by his wife just that day. You don't know when that will happen for you. It wont if you sit at home and do nothing on your own behalf. Those agencies don't know you exist. You need to call, make appointments and make yourself and your situation known. We have to sometimes be willing to help ourselves before we can find help.
If you decide to start working on your negative thought pattern, its going to be the hardest thing you've ever done. I have done it too. I left an abusive marriage. I had to go through counseling myself, not in as severe as situation as yourself, but the truth is that most people tend to entertain lots of negative thoughts.
try to go even 10 minutes without a negative thought and you will see how hard it is. But next time the thought that you are so stupid comes along replace it with "I may have difficulty with thinking and figureing things out thats true but it does not mean I am stupid. Lots of people have undiagnosed learning disabilities they grew up with and different learning styles like visual learners versus auditory/hearing and tactile learners who learn by touch and by doing."
You may have made it to 48 without anyone figuring out you had a learning disorder. So dont be so hard on yourself.
Good luck with finding the right agencies to help.

I hallucinate fireflies that are coloured silver or blue. Based on my previous research, these are just glints cased by minor problems in my vision cortex. i often see them whenever I get tired or in an extreme anger. One time when we had our investigatory project in school, our coach reprimanded us and I got really angry. I stared at her and I accidentally noticed that there were few silver and blue fireflies flying above her head, I picked those insects and she got more angry and taught there was something wrong with me. Years ago, I hallucinated dinosaurs when I have extreme fears or experience great adrenaline rush. These hallucinations didn't bothered me. i onced visited a mental doctor and he just said these were due to my anti-social behavior (when i was young) bcause I've had no childhood friends and it seemed that I grew up without siblings coz I was separated from them. I only had imaginary friends, family and world. I told my dad about these when i was younger and he introduced various sports to me and I go with him in outreach activities. I'm 16 now and i still have my imaginary friends even I'm no longer a sociopath. I'm a active in communty and an adrenaline junkie. is there something wrong with me? Pls help

You mention seeing a mental health doctor as a young child, but nothing since?
If whatever you are experiencing is affecting your quality of life, the hallucinations, an anger problem, anti social behavior still an issue, then I would go back for more treatment.
As far as I can tell from reading online, people do not tend to grow out of sociopathic tendancies. In fact the only treatments that are helpful are if they can get in early like age 4 and during their grade school years. Reports from Drs say that once they reach puberty, a sociopath is untreatable. I don't know how true that may be, its what I see on the internet.
I can't say whether any other advicegiver on here happens to be a psychologist who specializes in diagnosing and working with sociopaths or people who say they used to be one. We are going to be pretty much as clueless as the rest of society. The only times we hear the word sociopath or psychopath is in connection with a murder when there are other tendencies that make someone a sociopath. So hon, I can't say whether there is something wrong with you. Sometimes,being different than others, not following the normal is okay and harmless. If the difference is something that becomes harmful to yourself or others or in the quality of your life, thats when you have a big problem and need to seek help, professional help. Doctors can be wrong in how they diagnosed you. Now that you are older, I would think it best to get in and get re diagnosed so you know exactly what you are dealing with and if there is some kind of medication that can help even out your life.

Yes, you can get these dresses here, (link removed) of all kinds.

(Despite this being asked by a spammer, it got really good answers, so it stays for the sake of those answers.)

In recent years it has become popular to go with differing gowns for the bridesmaids as long as there are some basic parameters still.
Heres a clip from 'say yes to the dress' talking about how to set limits on differing gowns. the 5 bridesmaids shown in clip all chose 5 colors so clashing and different that it was awful and would not work. they have some good tips.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8UsZnexxZGQ

I did a online search using the words "bridesmaids differing gowns". You will come up with articles, photos and videos on the subject. Go to look at images to see what others have gone with for their wedding. I particularly like one of same style but different pastels, bridesmaids all in white but all short lacy dresses, ones in various shades of red or blues.
I will use the example of various shades of one color and how well it looked in some of these photos. A person's skin tone and hair color will determine what colors they look best in. If they are to enjoy the dress themselves after the wedding, it would be best if they know what "color season" they are. You might try having a color/wardrobe consultant meet the bridesmaids first to determine their personal best color palette and give them color swatches of the best colors for them. I used to do this as a job. If you wanted blue in the wedding, the gal with Winter color palette would look best in royal or cobalt blue, an Autumn would be best in teal blue, a Summer in sky blue, baby blue, and a Spring in pastel blue. When all the varying shades come together in a photo, it looks quite nice if the dress styles go together or are the same cut and fabric.
This is entirely up to you what you want. And if you allow the brides maids to wear colors that they look good in, they'll be happier and the whole effect will be more pleasing on the eyes of those attending the wedding.

I just hate wearing the seatbelt in the car. It wrinkles my clothes and is uncomfortable. I have recieved 3 traffic tickets over the last few years for not wearing it. The last one was a couple months ago and the fine was $114. My husband is not happy. Well I had to use my hair salon money to pay the fine.So my 17 year old grandaughter told hubby that she could cut my hair for me.She thinks that a short "home" haircut would be a good reminder for me to wear the seatbelt and also a good consequence for me.My husband agrees with her and wants me to let her cut my hair short. Are they being fair about this? Sue J.

I believe there is a hidden issue behind the fact of driving without seatbelts, the fine, the loss of hair salon money, a home hair cut as punishment or consequence, and whether they are fair or not.

I don't mean to be disrepectful to your age being a grandmother also, but your behavior reminds me a bit of what teenagers go through as far as making bad decisions cus they can't foresee the possible consequences, and or choosing to not exercise their willpower to make the right decisions, or not seeing other possible solutions to a problem...tunnel vision as far as their thoughts are concerned. In teens the main culprit is their pre-frontal cortex section of brain which is not yet fully developed. It isn't complete until our mid 20's. On rare occasions, it may be due to some mental condition we're born with. But other contributing factors to this section of the brain not working well that people dont think of is trauma to the head. So if you ever had an accident where you hit your forehead hard enough to cause damage to this part of your brain, that could be a reason behind your bad judgement here. You may be able to function fairly well in many areas so that nothing obvious is noticeable to indicate a need to be checked out by a doctor.
If the brain is not the issue, then the only thing that I believe could remain is that for some reason, you have chosen to not take responsibility for your life and your actions, you are choosing to give away all rights and decisions regarding your life. this I believe may be the most likely issue behind your story, especially when you would allow your husband and granddaughter to have control over what happens to you as far as consequences as concerned. I think you may have given all control of your life over to others cus you dont want to or are afraid of being the adult and being responsible to/for your own decisions and actions and so you act rebellious like a teen, driving without seat belt with no regard for your own safety or the law and like a teen still don't see the error of your ways and only want to complain about the consequences your parents (aka husband and granddaughter) impose upon you. Somehow, you have been allowed to skate through life, never coming up against the things that would change your behavior to becoming more adult like. Seriously what adult is worried that what her husband and granddaughter propose as a 'consequence' for driving without seatbeat is fair. What adult would even find themselves in such a situation?
Cutting hair is not the kind of thing that will change your behavior if you've gotten this far without doing so. I suspect that either all your family members are lying to themselves that you are acting as an adult or they do see that you have issues, will do nothing to bring the immaturity issue into the open and deal with it but continue to enable you to stay stuck by acting as your parents and dealing out punishment for bad actions. Sadly some adults do find themselves in this situation. You wrote us because you like a teen think its unfair? I have to deal with lots of teens writing in that don't think their parents are fair but heck they are in their teens years, you are not. I can't tell you to listen to your parents, you're an adult my age or older. If your husband and granddaughter believe that cutting your hair is the answer, then they need as much help as you do. I say, get the whole lot of you in for counseling regarding your inability to make adult decisions. Check out the medical side for contributing issues, and check out the mental side. No one is going to tell you to go. this is just my suggestion. but if you go, your family will need to see a counselor so they learn how to stop enabling you because their behavior is not normal either.

I have imaginary friends since I was young. I've had no friends. i only play with my mom or just myself,read books, play games, so I started to have imaginary friends and world. i talk to them always and play with them. Whenever I get bored I just think about my imaginary world. i would just close my eyes for hours and imagine about the world. There are huge skyscapers of candies, cotton candy clouds, my friends houses and their mobile numbers, and we have dinosaur pets. i have my own family there where I go to school and live my own life. These things didn't bothered me at all but i'm just worried because other teens didn't experienced like this. I consulted a doctor and said that there were things that are lacking in me (grew up with no siblings) Am I still normal?

You haven't given me enough information to fully understand with details whats going on here, other than you feel worried that you are not normal.
If I step back and look at this letter as a whole, it appears that you are a creative individual who is frustrated by a lack of outlets to express your creativity.
Obviously, in your situation, this is different from the norm but that doesn't mean that you are not normal. Many of the creative people and inventors of our history had greater focus on their creativitys and much less to none, on the friends and relationship interaction and yet they still contributed to society.
If you've seen a doctor and they have no real concerns, then may I suggest you focus on a outlet for your imagination either in art, drawing out what you see in your mind or writing detailed stories. It will be good therapy for you and you never know but your art or books may sell one day.

I didn't expect to get this. I wanted a list of ways to STOP THIS. I CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE! I even called a suicide hotline # about a month ago and was put on hold about a dozen times. I kept getting the same lady everytime I called and she clearly did not want to listen to me.
I need help...soon. I have called every number, talked to people, and been used by the rest.
Is there anybody out there who can help? The thought of even starting another month is too much.

I am sorry to hear you've tried hotlines and got no help. The currently economy has seen lots of cuts in staffing for such agencies or some help agencies close due to lack of funding.

The other person answering you is right, we don't have enough details as to know what has caused you to come to such a point. That might help guide us to give you more specific help ideas.

I don't even know your age. What are some of the most common reasons behind people wanting to commit suicide these days, I see a lot from teens whose hormones are out of balance too high or two low and that can bring on the severe depression that leads to suicidal feelings, another unknown one is eating poorly, especially if almost every meal is high fat high carbohydrates, cus then the body doesn't receive of what it needs and can become depressed, same as sugar binges, eventually the blood sugar drops and your body release more hormones to get the pancreas to create more and these changes in the body create depression and rages, we know a family member who was prone to this until they went off sugar almost totally and they weren't diabetic.
So those are some of the lesser obvious causes. Others can be a debilitating disease, constant physical pain, abusive home life, or sexual orientation with transexuals as the leading cause of suicides by teens as of late as I've heard.
Depending on what the causing issues are, there may be things that could help that you haven't thought of yet.

So in general, in case you decide not to share any more with us, all I can say is to get into volunteering. Free volunteers are needed and many agencies will be glad for the help. To get involved helping others in a worse position than you takes your focus off yourself. No it doesnt stop the cause of what has you feeling this way. But not focusing on yourself is the best thing I can say while not knowing specifics. In the volunteering you will come to be loved and appreciated by other volunteers who cant do it all theirselves. You begin to have a feeling of achievement, of doing something good which can go a long way towards having a positive effect on ones outlook on their life.
Don't give up yet. You have some work to do. You want things to get better, you are writing to us which is reaching out but you need to do a little more work and provide more info. Maybe we know of specific groups that can be more helpful than a general suicide hotline.

Now that i gave you more info and feedback i really want to know what you think i should do! Talking to him is out of the question! And talking to her is too me and her are enemies because she chose it that way she tries to make me look so bad with his family and saying that its my fault my bf puts me first before his family because i manipulate but i think she is just mad because her ex bf never did for her he would always blow her off and she would have to beg him to have sex with her. I know me and him are very serious and we want to start a more official relationship,we have talked about marriage now what am i going to do if that situation continues? Im going to HAVE to keep dealing with her crap cause i love him very much and i might just say yes to spending the rest of my days with him

So your official question is " what am i going to do if that situation continues?" Hmm, well you
have given reasons why you can't talk to her or to the boyfriend. That leaves the parents. I doubt you'll mention anything to them about her getting CBT cognitive behavior therapy. Besides, she's an adult and can decide she wont go for it even if someone were to mention it to her.
From the way you are talking, my guess is, that you will marry him and decide to just put up with it or as you put it 'deal with her crap'. Your original reason to write in was to find a way to get her to stop interfering in your relationship. Right now, there's nothing you can do. Once married, if the two of you choose to move far enough away that she can't travel to, then all he has to do is deal with her on the phone, that part will continue until she gets help. Sounds to me like a group of people set in their ways. Her with the CB problems, boyfriend not willing to learn to have some backbone and insist on guidelines, rules, parameters, and yourself my.You haven't lived long enough yet to have come across many other "really difficult' people to learn how to deal with them as peaceably as possible....this happens often in a job for example. Just as you can't avoid a coworker who is out to get you, you can't avoid a sister in law who's out to attack you. Right now you may feel you're the only one getting the brunt of her cognitive problems. But having cognitive behavioral problems is not selective. It doesnt mean she will pick on and focus on only one area or one person in her life. This will affect many other areas and I am willing to bet her ex boyfriends have been on the receiving end of her problematic behavior too and why they make themselves scarce, even if its just for sex. Until she gets help, you can count on her being like this for the rest of her life. She has no idea that she is the cause of all her problems, that she is causing it by how she thinks out things. So this problem is not going to go away hon. Perhaps if the entire family, parents boyfriend and you were to talk to her as a whole and attempt to convince her to go for therapy, things could get better. What do the parents think? Are they aware of her interferance and choosing to do nothing? It may be helpful for them to be aware. They may be able to say something to get things moving in a more positive direction. Its a tough situation, no chance of improvement if no one is willing to say anything to her. It may not help but then again, you, boyfriend and the parents wont know until you all try.

So i just cant stand my boyfriends sister she is a huge bitch and always tries to break us up every chance she gets
She is always getting into our business and always calls him with her stupid problems when me and him are hanging out
I love my bf but i can not stand when he mentions her name or picks up her call when we are doing something
I cant say specifically why i hate her because its too long of a story but she is an evil bitch and i just need advice on what to do cause she is the reason me and my bf argue alot

Hmm, your extra info on her being older does bring up another possibility. So instead of being jealous because of loss of time spent with close knit brother, this is more likely about her not having a boyfriend, no one interested in dating her, so she feels left out and unhappy and unfortunately is reacting in an immature way by feeling that "if I can't be happy, no one else should be either". That would explain her trying to interfere, trying to break you up, just seeing the two of you together or hearing your name is enough to remind her of what she doesnt have. You can try to befriend her as has been suggested but if it doesnt help, it may come down to her needing some specialty counseling regarding her negative cognitive processes that lead to this behavior. Someone may need to speak to her about seeking out help in the form of CBT cognitive behavior therapy. Here's a link on what it is:

http://psychology.about.com/od/psychotherapy/a/cbt.htm

Whenever I give my boyfriend a hickey it fades super quick or doesn't even leave a mark. Any tips?

Why is it important to you that the mark remains, I wonder? It is just to prove you're able to do it, or perhaps to mark him as 'being taken/not available'?
Practice on yourself first if its that important. Grab a spot on your arm and start sucking hard and dont let up, check your progress, if its not good enough, do it some more.
Heck, we did this as little kids just to amuse ourselves, making marks like this on our arms. If I could do that successfully on myself as a grade schooler, I am sure you can perfect yours.

If that still fails and you want to brand him as yours, Sharpie your name on his neck and maybe add a heart.

Does really your past life regression affects your life or in your future? I've experienced that years ago and the hypnotist said that I've lived like 15th century ago. I always dream when i get extreme fever about the people and things that the hypnotist described (old windmills, deep well, and grinders) and (the man in the railway and the lady named Mary). the hypnotist said that the lady I always see in my dreams was re-incarnated in me. And I always hallucinate after I wake when I dream about them and those things. I don't believe those things because I don't believe in any spiritual thoughts coz it's not proven by science. But it's hunting me, I've dreamt about those few days ago when I was extremely cold. I hallucinate but I really know that I'm NOT mentally ill. Pls help me about this.

Just as there are Quacks and charletans in any business, there are also those who aren't. That being said, it is difficult to know which are for real and which arent when the subject matter is arts and practices that no one can really measure thoroughly to prove it does or does not exist. Things like Past life regression, using pendulums, hypnosis, energy healing, Reiki, psychic abilities, divination of any kind, tarot cards, etc.....
Where is the proof for those experiences?

There's a old adage which originally went: "The proof of the pudding is in the eating,"
which basically means that the quality of something is uncertain until it has been tested directly or I say 'experienced'.

There are lots of things I have come to believe in that I did not before because of the experience.
Like air, God can't be seen. But those of us who have experienced a move of God or any supernatural experience, sometimes repeatedly, can no longer deny it. Our inner voice tells us that this is real. Whether this experience is worth our focus or attention really depends on if it helps with the life we're currently living, or is it a distraction to pull us off course. Is it something that feels full of love, light and peace, or something that brings on fear, anxiety and unrest?
I cannot tell you if the hypnotist was a quack, but it seems what they shared did not add to and enhance or help out in any way your current life.

I will share a story of my own to demonstrate what I mean. I used to live a Christian life, which meant I was taught that reincarnation does not exist. During those years, I was troubled by dreams in which I was as strong as a muscle builder man but yet female. In these repetitive dreams, there were bad people trying to come into our home to harm us and I tried to lock the door but found it had shrunk to not fit the door frame to be able to lock it. The killers knocked the door down and all I could think of was protecting the family and as these people came pouring in one by one, I would grab them and break their necks with my bare hands. It bothered me because i had these dreams often, never watch scary, killer movies, and disliked the idea of killing people, I'm a lover not a fighter. Then came the day I was on a Spiritual path but no longer identifying exactly with the Christian faith. God told me reincarnation was for real. I was shocked and it took some time to come to grips with it. End result though, next time I had that same dream again, I asked God why I kept having this dream. The answer I got is that in a past life, one of the few I chose to be a man in, I was a warrior meant to defend our village, not go on the attack. We came under attack and with my bare hands, having no weapons, I killed men by snapping their necks. I was remorseful for having had to kill but I had done so to protect our village. I was told that if I could come to grips with the fact that I killed but did so in self defense and could forgive myself, then I would no longer have the dream. God had no issue with me over those deaths, it was all about my soul needing to forgive itself. When I did so, the dreams disappeared. I haven't had a single occurance of those dreams in 10 years now.

Other people can tell me all they like that it was all in my head, I never really talked to God, I never really lived that past life...but they did not have the experience and also they may be a younger soul, not at the same belief level that my soul is at, and thats okay. They'll get there in a few more lifetimes. So I try not to tell anyone whether what spiritual or supernatural thing they believe is true or not because I have come to know that God will work with us at the level of belief that we are at. Only Gods spirit can tell us what we really need to know in order to bring growth and change in us. Trying to get all your answers only through someone else is not a good idea, no matter if they are truly gifted or not.
If you believe in God or guardian angels try talking to them consistantly. You won't hear anything back at first. Its like a muscle that needs to be exercised. Same thing I was told in church on how to pray to GOd and hear him.
At first you may get an impression about something, not actual words or pictures or scenes in your mind in answer to questions.
Because you do not believe in reincarnation and "these kinds of unexplainable supernatural things" does not mean their existance isn't real. You may have no explanation for why you see actual persons from your dream while awake. If caused by schizophrenia or something like that, medication from a doctor would help some.
If you are experiencing the supernatural, there isn't a pill that makes it go away. So the help that you want, if its help to stop the dreams, no one here can tell you what to do to make them stop. If you wanted help to understand what is going on if you are Not crazy, then this is my best explanation.
I know I am not crazy or mentally ill either but some of the things I have experienced are things that people used to be burned at the stake as witches for. People tend to fear that which they cannot explain or try hard to disprove it by any means. Luckily we live in a time where that is no longer the case.

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