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Was This A Threat?
I broke up with my boyfriend today and he seemed kinda sad about it. He's a mostly quiet person... But I didn't really know how to break up with him, but I kinda lied to him (Yes, I know it was bad, but I wasn't thinking and I was scared). I told him that I got in trouble for dating him and that we should just stay friends. He asked who got me in trouble and I just didn't answer. He also said "Wow I wanna shoot whoever did that" and that kinda got me scared... He asked if it was my parents then said "No I wouldn't do that"... But like I don't know if he was just upset or actually meant it. He's a sweet guy so I wouldn't think he would do that, but like I don't want there to be like a school shooting... I'm a VERY paranoid person so I could just be overthinking this, but what do you guys think?
Also, please don't tell me to tell like an adult about this because it could probably just be nothing but I don't want to be wrong either.
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As an adult someone old enough to be your grandparent what I see as relevant here is not the fact that you lied, that is a different subject. What is relevant is how he reacted. Was his reaction just false bravado or is he capable of carrying out this threat? Is he able to get his hands on any type of weaponry, meaning does his parent's keep fire arms in the home?
If your answers to my questions are yes or I'm not sure; then as I see it you do not have much of a choice. You need to tell someone of his threat. In all of the incidents of mass shootings the shooter has been described very much like you say your boy friend is. It is impossible to tell what may make someone do something like what has happened in the past.
Now who should you tell? You could start with telling your parents' and let them decide if this is something that needs to be taken further. You could also talk with a teacher at school that knows the boy. I'm sure the teacher will evaluate what you tell him/her and take the appropriate action.
If it is determined that you boy friend was just running off at the mouth. Then nothing will happen to him. It will be a good object lesson for everyone in school as to how to control their thoughts and mouth. While false bravado may seem cool it certain times and places it can scare people.
A short story about to make my point. In the early days when idiots started to hijack planes. My wife and I were vacationing in Miami and then going on to San Francisco. We were in line for check in when some young man in another line started shouting HICH JACK and pointing his arm in the air. This of course sounds just like HYJACK. Well the third time he did this he had some new jewelry, a custom pair of bracelets courtesy of the Miami Dade Police. He was arrest and charged with several felonies.
That was 40 years ago. Today people are a lot more sensitive to remarks people make. By law if someone makes a threating remark towards you and you feel they are capable of carrying out that threat. Then that person is guilty of assault. Is your boy friend capable of carrying out the threat he made?
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I think you should just drop the subject with him. If he makes you nervous, don't go out of your way to talk to him and explain things. You broke up with him and that's that. Just move on.
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If you said so today, and regret saying it now, there's still time left in the day to call and tell him you lied and why. Just come even. He may be hurt of course, but it is better to have someones respect if not friendshp. Being honest goes a long way to saying something about your character.
I know, this is hard to do, scary too. But very emotional things that people come across in life will bring emotional statements like, "The person who did that should be shot, or should be hung upside down from their ankles, or should have their tongue cut out, be castrated, be beaten up. I have heard many other creative expressions all nothing more than a way for the speaker to say something to show how strongly they feel about the act, in your case 'someone getting you in trouble', while we feel strongly about what we perceive as an injustice whether done to us or someone else, there are very few people who would ever dream of doing such a thing as shooting someone. The news you listen to daily has reports more bad than good stuff so you are led to believe that every school is in danger of a shooting occuring on a yearly basis for each. Yes, you are being paranoid. Time to take a break from following the media so closely.
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I think you may be overthinking it.
If it keeps bugging you, come clean. Just tell him you weren't feeling it anymore, it wasn't right to keep going etc. etc. Its only kinder to end it before you're in too deep.
You needn't worry though. You broke up with him for a reason so stick to it.
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