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spring hairdo
I just hate wearing the seatbelt in the car. It wrinkles my clothes and is uncomfortable. I have recieved 3 traffic tickets over the last few years for not wearing it. The last one was a couple months ago and the fine was $114. My husband is not happy. Well I had to use my hair salon money to pay the fine.So my 17 year old grandaughter told hubby that she could cut my hair for me.She thinks that a short "home" haircut would be a good reminder for me to wear the seatbelt and also a good consequence for me.My husband agrees with her and wants me to let her cut my hair short. Are they being fair about this? Sue J.
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I believe there is a hidden issue behind the fact of driving without seatbelts, the fine, the loss of hair salon money, a home hair cut as punishment or consequence, and whether they are fair or not.
I don't mean to be disrepectful to your age being a grandmother also, but your behavior reminds me a bit of what teenagers go through as far as making bad decisions cus they can't foresee the possible consequences, and or choosing to not exercise their willpower to make the right decisions, or not seeing other possible solutions to a problem...tunnel vision as far as their thoughts are concerned. In teens the main culprit is their pre-frontal cortex section of brain which is not yet fully developed. It isn't complete until our mid 20's. On rare occasions, it may be due to some mental condition we're born with. But other contributing factors to this section of the brain not working well that people dont think of is trauma to the head. So if you ever had an accident where you hit your forehead hard enough to cause damage to this part of your brain, that could be a reason behind your bad judgement here. You may be able to function fairly well in many areas so that nothing obvious is noticeable to indicate a need to be checked out by a doctor.
If the brain is not the issue, then the only thing that I believe could remain is that for some reason, you have chosen to not take responsibility for your life and your actions, you are choosing to give away all rights and decisions regarding your life. this I believe may be the most likely issue behind your story, especially when you would allow your husband and granddaughter to have control over what happens to you as far as consequences as concerned. I think you may have given all control of your life over to others cus you dont want to or are afraid of being the adult and being responsible to/for your own decisions and actions and so you act rebellious like a teen, driving without seat belt with no regard for your own safety or the law and like a teen still don't see the error of your ways and only want to complain about the consequences your parents (aka husband and granddaughter) impose upon you. Somehow, you have been allowed to skate through life, never coming up against the things that would change your behavior to becoming more adult like. Seriously what adult is worried that what her husband and granddaughter propose as a 'consequence' for driving without seatbeat is fair. What adult would even find themselves in such a situation?
Cutting hair is not the kind of thing that will change your behavior if you've gotten this far without doing so. I suspect that either all your family members are lying to themselves that you are acting as an adult or they do see that you have issues, will do nothing to bring the immaturity issue into the open and deal with it but continue to enable you to stay stuck by acting as your parents and dealing out punishment for bad actions. Sadly some adults do find themselves in this situation. You wrote us because you like a teen think its unfair? I have to deal with lots of teens writing in that don't think their parents are fair but heck they are in their teens years, you are not. I can't tell you to listen to your parents, you're an adult my age or older. If your husband and granddaughter believe that cutting your hair is the answer, then they need as much help as you do. I say, get the whole lot of you in for counseling regarding your inability to make adult decisions. Check out the medical side for contributing issues, and check out the mental side. No one is going to tell you to go. this is just my suggestion. but if you go, your family will need to see a counselor so they learn how to stop enabling you because their behavior is not normal either.
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You don't need to let anyone cut your hair if you don't want too. If the money you would have spent at the salon is gone, then you are free to go without, or to see a much cheaper hairdresser. You are not obliged to let your granddaughter give you short hair cut as punishment.
However, you do need to wear a seatbelt, like reasonable adult human being who obeys the law and values their own life. It's is incredibly childish and moronic for you to refuse to do so.
When I was ten I watched my best friend go head first through a windshield. Had she been wearing her seatbelt, she would have been shaken and bruised, because she wasn't she was very, very lucky to be alive. Of course, she missed most of the next two years of school because she was in hospital.
Wear your damn seatbelt. No one should have to 'punish' you with a short hair cut for you to start acting reasonably. You should be smart enough to suck it up and do the right thing without your husband and grandchild having to bully you into it.
Get your act together. Wear the seatbelt. Stop being such an idiot. You are going to get yourself killed.
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