I work as a Customer Laison Complaints Case Officer at a major insurance company, where I have worked for 3 years. I left school when I was 17, as I had some very bad experiences at school and wanted to see what the real world had to offer.
I now live with my boyfriend of 3 years and spend my spare time reading, writing, socialising with friends or just watching some TV.
Times are still hard and I'm trying to cope with various health problems on a daily basis but I'm working my way through things and really want to stop it from getting me down.
I dream of some day going to America and watching a real baseball game (we don't have that at all in the UK) and perhaps finding a job I find creatively fulfilling. Until then, I'm happy trying to be me and making the best of what I have.
Website: My Space
Gender: Female
Location: Dorset, UK
Occupation: Customer Liaison Case Officer
Age: 21
MSN: hottchickie@hotmail.com
Member Since: January 28, 2006
Answers: 1016
Last Update: March 5, 2009
Visitors: 65021
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If the guy you like, asked you if you liked him, what would you say? Should you tell him the truth and take the risk, or just tell him you don't like him and keep it all inside for him to find out?
Thanks. (link)
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Honestly? Having been in this exact situation, I would say yes.
When I was 12, I was (I thought) really in love with this guy and I had kept it a secret for around a year. Then, it all came out at a party and the next week at school, he came up to me and just asked me straight out "Do you fancy me, Vikki?" And I was SO embarrassed!! My cheeks were flaming, I couldn't look up from what I was writing and I just muttered "No!" and he walked away.
Years on, I found out he actually did like me and although I don't regret it now, I regretted not having told him how I felt for a long time!!!
So, although it seems like the end of the world when a guy you like finds out how you feel but trust me, it's worse when you realise you missed the opportunity for something to come of it.
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Last night a few of my friends and I were at the beach and this was like right behind my beach house. Two of them passed out and we didn't feel like dragging them inside so we just stayed out there a little while and we accidentally fell asleep on the beach.
Yeah, not too smart but when we woke up, three of us had this weird red bumpy rash. I was sleeping on my back and I got it on my lower back. Another girl got it on her arm and my other friend also got it on his back, but upper back.
Has this happened to anyone before? Do you think we should all go to the doctor and get it checked out or just wait and see if it goes away? The rashes all look the same so we're pretty sure it was from the sand or something.
(link)
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It could have been sand fleas but it could also have been heat rash, perhaps. If it's lots of very small raised red bumps, that is likely to be heat rash, especially if it itches. If the sand was hot that day, it might be that it just made your skin very hot from lying on it.
The best thing to do is to go to your doctor or to a pharmacy and ask them to check it out. They will be able to recommend a skin cream for it.
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ohkay, everyone is telling me that the world is going to end in 4 days (6-6-06) (the devil's number.) I AM REALLY SCARED OVER THIS. I CAN BARLEY SLEEP. im like pettrified. is what they're telling me true or is a myth? and do you believe it? and should i be scared?
thanks guys. (link)
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Please don't panic about this!!
You know, I remember back in 1994, walking to school with a friend and remarking that Nodstradamus said the world would end that day and I was SO worried!! But the world didn't end!
There will always be people who say things like this but you have to try to keep your mind on ground level and realise that it's all superstition or theoretical. The truth is, yes, there is the possibility the world could end. But the world could end on any day of the week, month or year! I'm not trying to make you more worried, I just want to give you a little perspective. The world would end for a reason such as being hit by a large meteor or because the Supervolcano erupted or some other such thing. But there has been no evidence to suggest anything like this will occur within the next few days so I really don't think you need to worry.
So just sit back, calm down, and wait for 07/06/06.
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I've recently lost my virginity, and yes a condom was used. But I'm not sure if my vagina looks right. When you loose your virginity, are your inner lips supposed to be looser and somewhat stick out of your outer lips? It's not uncomfortable or anything, I just think it looks different cause my inner lips were always completely inside my outer ones. Is something wrong? (link)
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No don't worry, nothing is wrong. The truth is that every woman looks different 'down there' and some parts may be longer, thicker, thinner or shorter than others.
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I feel REALLY bad about something that happened today. Well I was in a horrible mood this morning because of what happened at work the other day- things got so bad I almost quit. Also I got no sleep because I ran out of my medication last night that I'm supposed to take before I go to bed. Well my friend walked over to my appartment this morning (uninvited). I was still in a really bad mood and was being really bitchy- not to her just moody. I apologized to her and then treated her to lunch at Mcdonalds. I told her why I was upset and that I was thinking of looking for a new job. I still feel really bad- when she first walked in to my appartment building she said "good morning"- I said "it's not a good morning". I apologized twice- but she sort of just invited herself over which upset me a little she should have phoned first. Should I still apologize for being bitchy or just drop it? (link)
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As far as apologising or compensating people for your own bad behaviour goes, I'm very much in favour of the "apology must fit the crime" kind of theory. In other words, if you do something really bad, you have to do something really nice to make up for it.
However, if the only thing you did wrong was to be in a bad mood and not be as friendly to her as you could, I would say that taking her to McDonalds for lunch and apologising twice is really all you need to do. If she is really your friend then she will already have known you were in a bad mood and that you didn't mean to take it out on her. She will also probably feel very uncomfortable if you apologise more than is necessary. So accept that you have now done all you can and if she is being friendly to you again, the problem is resolved. Don't dwell on it too much. The problem is that you are trying to compensate her for the guilt you feel and that won't work. Accept that it happened, it's over and you've been forgiven. Then let it go and try to smile!
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ok so i have liked this guy for about a year now and the hard part is that he's a senior and im a freshman. he's graduating friday night and my friends were suposed to tell him i liked him but they didn't and i want him to know before he goes. he leaves saturday for a summer tour thing and then off to california for college for four years so the time is now to let him know. should i write him a letter and give it to him tomorrow night or is that to forward? guys opinions will help too thanks. (link)
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I really think you should tell him face to face.
I know the risks involved. I've been there, done that and I can promise you that if you don't do it, you will regret it for a LONG time. Telling him directly shows confidence, which men love and it also means you can get a response direct because you've delivered the message directly. If you do it by letter, you won't even know what has happened if he doesn't respond.
Just take a deep breath and remember this might be your last chance to tell him. Then walk up to him and say something along the lines of "Hey. I know this might not really mean anything to you but I have really liked you for a long time and I know there's no chance of anything happening but I just didn't want you to leave without me ever having told you that." Just leave it at that and let it be.
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ok, so here's the story:I'm a guy, and I have a twin sister. We are like totally close, like, closer than most siblings ever are. But I just found out a few days ago that she went out with this really not-so-good guy like a year ago(and by not-so-good i mean does not know how to treat a girl. AT ALL). I also just found out that this guy wants to go out with her again. I told her that I don't like him and that she shouldn't go out with him, but she's just so stubborn and rebelious sometimes! But seriously, this guy is not the best guy for her. He drinks, he smokes, he kicks GIRLS, and my sister has totally fallen for him. AGAIN. I don't know how they broke up last time, but I'm determined to stop this before it starts up again. Please Help! (link)
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This must be a very difficult situation for you, and I appreciate that you want to protect her but however hard you try, she will always do exactly what she wants. Especially if she is rebellious and stubborn.
Warn her that you don't think he's good enough for her because of what you have heard and say that she can go out with him if she wants but after they split up last time, you heard he wasn't a nice guy and you're worried that she might regret it if she goes out with him. Do NOT say she would be making a mistake because this implies a failing on her part. Simply say she might end up regretting it and you don't want to see her get hurt. This way, she will understand how you feel.
However, I would like to stress that this does not mean she won't go out with him because if she has made up her mind she will, she'll do it regardless of what you or anyone else says. The only thing you can do is warn her of the possible consequences and be there to pick up the pieces.
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my mom has MS (multiple sclerosis) and she can still walk but not for a long period of time, and she can't really be active that much but she is still normal besides not being able to walk for a long time and definitely not run. is she going to die? i just thought for a while that its just a little disease that if you take your shots for it (wich she does) it will be alright. but then i looked up "multiple sclerosis" on advicenators and it said this girl's mom died from it. will she die? is this going to get worse? dont sugarcoat it please (link)
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I'm so sorry this has happened to your Mum. MS is a horrible disease.
I really think you need to talk to your Mum about your concerns. However, I will tell you that sadly, it is a degenerative disease so yes, she will get worse over a period of time and it is terminal. However, she could have many, many years ahead of her so please don't panic yet.
Now, I want you to pass a message to your Mum because there is something I have heard a lot about lately. There is no cure for MS but there is treatment available. The major downside is that it is somewhere like Scandanvia only at the moment and it is very expensive. In all the stories I have read, the family of the sufferer have done serious fundraising (fun runs, various other sponsors, bake sales etc) and raised the money quite quickly. Although the treatment isn't guaranteed to work on everyone, if it were to work, your Mother could experience a new lease of life. She could walker longer distances, any sight she has lost could be returned. There are a lot of benefits and I would strongly recommend that you suggest this to your Mother.
I wish you all the best of luck for the future.
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okay well me and my boyfriend have been going out for like 27 months or so and its been pretty great. we have broken up a couple of times but for different reasons. and lately we have been arguing alot. like alot. and i have tlked to him about it on a number of occasions and then he apoligizes and everything is okay for like a week.. then it happens again. well i do love him. but we have been going out for so long and these are suppose to be the best years of our lives so i want to just kind of see what else is out there and have fun and not be tied down all of highschool. who knows? maybe the one for me is right there in front of me. well i have broken up with him and everytime i just go right back to him. either because i miss him or just plain jealousy bc i dont like seeing him with other girls. i dont know what to do. is the break-up a good idea? and if it is what do i say. another problem if we do breakup i know i will be a bit emotional and last time i did i cried alot and my mom just blamed the whole thing on me and thought as if i just wanted attention or something because my family likes him alot. i can see a future with it but do u think i should see what else is out there and if he is the one i want to be with just go back to him? i dont know. HELP!!!
signed,
very confused (link)
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If you are feeling the urge to see other people or see what is out there and if things are really that bad with your boyfriend then the best thing you can do is to break it off. I know that sounds terrible and I usually do encourage people to work things through but if you have broken up already a couple of times, perhaps for now you are better off apart. I don't know what these issues are that you are fighting over but it might be that some time apart will give you the opportunity to individually work through them and then, if in time you want to get back together, you can.
However, you need to stop going back to him. I know it is difficult when you care a lot about someone but more than anything else, it's really toying with each other's emotions because you will always be wondering "Are we going to break up again?" This alone is going to make it difficult not to argue.
I really think you need to take some time apart and when I say some time, I mean a few months. I know you're probably horrified at the idea but I think the space would do you both good and it would give you a chance to see what else is out there without worrying about hurting him. BUT. You need to get over your jealousy! I know it's hard to do but if you really want to see what else is out there, you need to deal with it and do what you want to do.
Also, if you do break up, you have every right to cry about it!!! Breaking up with someone doesn't mean they are the only ones that suffer! You are entitled to be upset.
Have a think about it. I really do think a time apart would do you both good.
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15/F
Today in health we watched "the cycle of life" or something, about babies being born. Well ..I know how they are and stuff, but in this video they showed EVERYTHING, like and, I think I'm scarred, I always wanted to have kids before this, but now I'm thinking I dont want to, since it grossed me out so much, and my health teacher said it hurts a lot. And from what I saw, ew.. and blah.
Do you think I will change my mind later in life? Because I want kids, but blah it seems gross..I'm young, so I will most likely change my mind about kids later right? (link)
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I can understand why you are put off. The 'miracle of new life' is absoloutely disgusting and terrifying to watch! However, the truth is that when you are with the right person and you KNOW you want a baby, everything you saw in that video will suddenly seem so worth it because all you will want is to hold this beautiful little baby in your arms and know that it is YOUR job to raise it and care for it and help it become whoever it is meant to be.
But you know, the reason they show you things like this at your age is because it is an important deterrant. There has been a massive increase in teen pregnancies over the last 5 years alone, especially in the UK and America and although there are a few kids that think they would like to have babies because they are sure they are ready, videos like this help to drum into them and kids that think it's a good idea to have underage sex or unprotected sex the consequences of their actions. After all, the last thing you are going to want to do after watching some poor women squeeze something the size of a watermelon out something the size of a grape is go out and let themselves get in the same position!!!
So don't worry, when the time comes, you will feel ready for kids, in spite of everything that comes with them. For now, just make the most of being a 15 year old and not having to go through such an ordeal!
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I don't think I entered this right before, so here it is again...
This is a long one...bear with me!
I have been with my fiance for 5 years. Last year I was feeling a little restless, and needless to say I left him for another guy. About a month later my fiance and I got back together and things were great. Now they are back to the same old thing again. (being treated like crap) And I have been thinking about "mr. fling" a whole lot lately. I think that I may be in love with him. Even though it was a short time we were together, we really connected. I miss him a lot, I dream about him, I really want to talk to him but I know that I can't. We live seperate lives now (him and his girlfriend-and myself and my fiance)
I just need some advice...on anything!!!
Confused 24 female (link)
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I know that this isn't the main issue here but you really are confused so we'll start at the beginning.
If you know that you have feelings for another man and if you know that things can go back to being 'the same old thing again', then what are you doing marrying this other guy?? If we are going to be brutally honest here, and I always am, you are putting yourself in a position where you intend to make a lifelong commitment to a guy that you clearly don't want to be committed to. You aren't happy with him, you want someone else and you shouldn't be marrying him. I know that he loves you and I really feel that from your message you don't truly love him. Not in the way that you should. Every couple has problems and to an extent you should always try to overcome them but if things are that bad that you have strayed once already, marrying him is futile.
Regarding 'Mr.Fling', you already know you can't have him but then again maybe that's not really the issue. I know you say you had a connection with him but is it possible it isn't necessarily him you want but that connection? You don't seem to have that with your fiancee and you want to find it with another man. You have a fixation with this guy because you felt that connection with him. That spark that is missing from your relationship and you want that back. You could try to get it back with your fiancee but I would strongly advice against it in this case.
If you want my absoloute opinion on the matter, in summary, you need to break off the engagement with your fiancee and this time NOT go back to him and you need to find someone else. Not necessarily Mr Fling because it is one thing to cheat on someone else (bad enough) but another to encourage someone else to cheat (much worse!). So give yourself some breathing room and don't be with anyone for a while but get out and enjoy being single. When your real Mr Right comes along, you will feel that connection again.
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well,my friend gets really sad and worried about things she shouldn't get sad over. She is sad and questioning if she will ever find love. She just thinks all the guys out there are perverted freaks. yeah so i tell here she will but she doesn't listen what should i do?
Thanks, Tamia (link)
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I'm afraid there isn't really a lot you can do about it except try to reassure her.
What she is going through is typical of what just about every woman out there goes through at some point in life, on at least one occasion. There gets to be a point where you have had SO many bad relationships and/or have met SO many awful guys that would never treat you right that you just think "This is it. I'll be a spinster for the rest of my life!" But as far as I am concerned, there is someone out there for EVERYBODY and if you can't find any of the decent guys then you just aren't looking in the right places.
For example, I had a friend who could NOT find a decent guy. She met guys who went through her and she never saw them again and it was awful. She was a mess. But the problem was she was finding these guys in bars and clubs and other such unsavoury places and the truth is, if you look in places like that, you will seldom find guys who will treat you properly. These are the sorts of men who like to go out, get drunk and hit on women. In my experience at the very least, men like this end up being commitment phobic, posessive, drunkards or womanisers.
If your friend wants to meet someone she can truly have a real relationship with, she needs to look places where men will go when they aren't just trying to 'hang out with the lads' or get drunk or hit on random women. She needs to join a club for something she is interested or try something new. Get a job if she doesn't have one already or go to a different area if she does.
She also needs to stop generalising that all men are perverted freaks because all the negative energy she will be giving off is going to scare away any decent bloke that comes her way. So tell her to relax and focus on other things in her life because having a man is NOT everything. Then encourage her to try something new where she may meet men but she will have a lot of fun even if she doesn't.
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13/f
Ive noticed that in the past few days ive been crying all the time, and i dont know why, cos im happy, yesterday was great and its the half term so things are fun. But yesterday i was reading this book about two people in love and then they had this big emotional row and just because of that i started crying.
Then this morning i checked my email and there was this chain mail about how you dont realise how much you love your parents until theyre gone, which made a few tears come from my eyes. Then, i was just watching the streets new music video (where he sings about how he misses his father) and i almost cried.
I dont know why, as i hardly ever cry, why do i keep crying at all these little things? (link)
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Sounds like hormones to me! Welcome to the wold of Womanhood. In most cases, this means you will be crying half the time, whether it is at a film, a sad song, a book or even just an ad on TV! It also means that if you haven't already, you are well on the path to getting periods, breasts and all those other 'wonderful' things that make us women!
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so story is me and my boyfriend were having unprotected sex saturday (27). yes i know, very bad, but we were just trying it for a second. he kept going and finally pulled out and was like oh shit. i looked down and the cum was coming out. i asked him if he pulled out in time but he didnt know. now im freaking out because i havent gotten my period. i was due the 27-30. we looked ovulation up and it said the days before your period your infertile. could it just be stress that is keeping me from getting it or should i go to the doctor? please help. i rate 5's (link)
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I'm not sure where you looked this up but you should ignore it. You can get pregnant at any time in your menstrual cycle if you have unprotected sex.
I would also like to point out that you can get pregnant whether he climaxes inside you or not. When a man is aroused, the sperm still 'leaks' out, so to speak so his sperm will be inside you whether he 'pulls out in time' or not.
Get yourself a pregnancy test (most work from around 3 days before your period is due) and in the future, make sure you always use a condom. I would also strongly recommend you get yourself on the Pill. It is 99.9% effective and used with condoms at the same time (what the Dutch call going 'Double Dutch'), you're as safe as you can get.
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So I have two really great friends. At one time we were all friends together. But last year, I was stuck in the middle, and my two friends stopped being friends. But I was still friends with each of them. Both of my friends have different 'groups' of friends, whom im in both groups. I'm having a party this Summer, and I want to invite all of my friends. (Which are my two friends, and BOTH of their groups.) I'm really stuck between who to invite, cause I love them both, but I know some fighting drama will most likely go down if they both come, and it'll all just be ruined. I really love both of them, and I feel if i don't invite one or the other, someone's feelings will get hurt. What should I do?
(PS - I can't have two different parties.)
Thank You!
xoxo (link)
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I know that this situation is very unfair on you and to be honest, it's wrong of your friends to put you in the middle, just because they can't set aside their differences.
Here's what you need to do. Speak to each friend individually. Tell them that you would really love it if they would come because it would mean a lot to you. Also tell them that you are inviting the other and as much as you care about them both, if they cause any problems at the party, you will make sure they get kicked out. I know that sounds harsh but at the end of the day, if they can't put aside their differences for one day for your party, they shouldn't be there in the first place. Don't let them make you feel you have to choose between them because you shouldn't have to. The fact of the matter is that they have a problem with each other and not with you. They can't make you suffer because of their argument or they aren't true friends.
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ok this is kinda weird...
i have this thing under my arm pit and it hurts really bad
i asked my mom what it was but she isnt sure
it goes far down into my skin and i thought it was like a bug bite or something but its goes really far down and i dont know what it is
any ideas what it could be?
oh and its not from shaving and its isnt a pimple either (link)
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I had a similar thing once. It could be a swollen gland, or, as someone suggested further down, a swollen lymph node. When I had this problem, it disappeared after a couple of days but was very sore at the time.
Whenever you develop any sort of lump around your breasts or armpits, you should always ensure you see a doctor, just to be on the safe side. So make sure you get an appointment and even if it is just an infection, they may be able to give you something to treat it.
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ok so i have this boyfriend. He's awsome and we have been dating for about 6 months.a few nights ago he called me and told me that he was going to be gone for a week. Well he was gone for 6 days and when he got back we were having sex. I noticed a bruise on his stomache. At first i ddin't care but then i got closer and it turned out to be a hickey. i didn't say anything at the time though. THe next day we went to the movies but in the middle of the movies he got a call. When he came back he told me it was a call from his brother. I checked his phone after the movies and it was to a girl named mindy. Two days later i called his house and a girl in the background was screaming his name like in a sexual way! is he cheatin on me??? wat should i do? should i bust him or just ask him about it?
(link)
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You should most DEFINITELY bust him!!! I'm sorry but there is really no doubt in my mind that he is cheating on you. After all, how else would he get a hickey on his stomach?! Why else would he be calling some girl named Mindy that you have never heard of and telling you it was his brother?! Why else would there be some girl, at his house, screaming his name?! I would be interested to know what excuse he came up with for that one.
You could try talking to him about it but he's already lied to you and he will do it again. He'll tell you that she's just a friend, that you're being paranoid, so on and forth. Then, when he eventually does admit it, he'll probably tell you she didn't mean anything to him, that he really cares about you and doesn't want to stop seeing you. Personally, this is when I would kick him in the groin, turn on my heel and walk. However, I don't think I am allowed to provide that sort of advice.
Instead, I strongly suggest you confront him about it. Don't ASK him if he is cheating, TELL him you know that he is cheating. Let him know you think he is a cheating, lying scumbag and that he doesn't deserve you. Then walk out on him and let that be the end of it. Most importantly and I am begging you with this one. Don't let him talk you into taking him back. Guys like this will not only take their cake and eat it but they'll take the cake from the starving family next door and eat it! You deserve a lot better than him and you will find it. Ditch the loser and get out there and find your Knight In Shining Armour.
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i'm fifteen yrs old. i'll be sixteen in 3 months. which isn't very far away. in november i met a guy and i really liked him. we talked for a whole day and then he asked me out. I said yes and i fell wayy hard. we had a relationship like no other. we deffently fell in love. he was 17. his birthday is in like two weeks. when we broke up i made an agreement with myself to get him back because i really did love him.. we were apart for a month and he dated people and so did i but we always found ourselves making out and holding hands every chance we got and talking on the phone everynight and still saying i love you. then he went out with my best friend and this completely killed me. one week later they broke up because she cheated on him and then he asked me back out. i didn't even hisitate to say yes. i had the love of my life back. this time we've been together for 4 months. it's been nothing short of amazing. we've seriously been through everything and we have an undying love for each other. last week my mom told me that she didn't want us dating any more being she thinks he's too old and she thinks he s a loser because he droped outa school. ive tried talking to her about this before and it worked. but she said this time her mind is final. this guy is really my everything but his friends don't like me. they think i cheat on him and stuff and are constinaly telling him he can do better. well we've been trying so hard to stay together and now he's ready to just give up. i think he got this idea from his friends but even tough we broke up last night.. nothing's changed.. i think he's coming over tomorrow to talk to me about it and i even wrote him a long email... if i dont get him back i swear i'll die. any advice for me...
i'm not goin gto move on so don't bother telling me that...
any questions about anything just ask. (link)
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Oh you poor thing!! Nothing and I mean nothing hurts more than losing a loved one, whether you lose them because you break up or they pass on or they just leave.
However, even though I know you love him and can't imagine your world without him, he isn't necessarily going to be the only love you ever have. When I was 12, I was very much in love with a guy at my school and we were good friends. When he left to go to a different school and told me he never wanted to see me again, I felt pain that I never even imagined existed and it took me five whole years to truly get over him. Then, when I was 17, I met the guy I am with now and although I truly believed I loved the first guy because it FELT like love and I couldn't imagine life without him, it cannot compare to what I have now.
My point is that even though this feels like the real thing right now, you are still only 15 and the truth is, you have SO much life left to live that you can't just say "He's the one" and let that be the end of it. BUT, I'm not telling you to get over him. It's not that easy and in my experience, you need to be ready to get over someone and move on and you aren't there yet. By the sounds of it, neither is he.
Now, the main issue is resolving the problem with your Mum. I can truly understand her concern because although the age gap isn't very great, those two years can make a huge difference when you are young and to a Mother, the idea of her 15 year old daughter dating what she imagines to be a 17 year old Lothario is terrifying. In her mind, she probably imagines him seducing you into sex and young drinking and going off somewhere in his car with him......the worries of a Mother are endless. Please also understand that she has had to cope with seeing her beloved daughter heartbroken a number of times by this guy. I can sympathise with her completely on this one. I doubt she wants to see you go through that again. I know you say you tried to talk to her about it but, although I don't want to patronise you by saying this, how reasonable was the discussion? I only say this because it is only in this last year that I have begun to be able to discuss disputed matters with my parents without getting loud and very emotional when they disagree with me!!
If he is willing and your Mum is willing, it might be a good idea to allow your Mum to give him a 'grilling', so to speak. The only way her worries will be laid to rest is if she has a chance to confront him about them directly. I'm not saying this will be a comfortable experience for you or the guy in question but it might be a necessity if you wish to see him again.
On a side note, the fact that he dropped out of school is not necessarily a valid point. I also dropped out of school when I was 17 and it was the best decision I ever made. I now have a very well paid job, a steady boyfriend and a mortgage, while my friends that stayed on to go to university are thousands of pounds in debt. You need to stress to your Mother that education is something you can return to at any point in your life but he is currently working on life experience and if you miss out on that, you can never get it back.
As for his friends, if this guy is worth having at all, what his friends think should have no bearing on his relationship with you. There will ALWAYS be people who stand on the sidelines of someone else's relationship shouting criticism but the thing he needs to realise is that it isn't their relationship and the only people that EVER count to a relationship is the two people in it. If he can't stand by you while his friends are bitching about you then he's not a very good boyfriend to you.
Basically, he needs to ditch the friends, you need to let your Mother speak to him directly to qualm her fears and you need to accept that however much you may love him, sometimes thing just aren't destined to be and even if you don't want to or don't think you can, you may have to try to get over him and move on. Please don't rule this out as an option. I know it feels like it but you really won't die if you aren't with him because at only 15, you have no idea what sort of fantastic life is waiting for you out there. You can't throw that away on a guy, no matter how strongly you feel about him. It will all work out for the best but you need to be strong, whatever happens.
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my best best best friend is moving to eather London or Dubai! im really upset and most days of the week i end up crying at night. theres absolutaly nothing i can do about it. its a definate and i only have one more month with her. who knew our 7 year friend ship would come to a end. im so upset. please help (link)
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I'm so sorry! What a terrible thing to have happen!
I wish I could do something to help but what happens now is really down to you and your friend because you need to work to maintain the friendship.
Make sure that you can telephone each other from time to time when you really need to (I mean REALLY need to or your parents will hit the roof when they find the phone bill!).
Also, remember that the World-Wide Web is always there and failing that, there will ALWAYS be pen and paper! I can imagine it would be quite exciting having a pen-pal in a foreign country!
Just because you can't see her face to face now, it doesn't mean the friendship can no longer exist. She will still be your friend but also your pen-pal.
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I have been seeing a 31 year old recently (about 6 months ago) seperated guy. This guy is great and I am finding myself falling for him. We have a strong sexual chemistry and i cant stop thinking about him ...
He seems to feel the same.
Problem: He was married , has 2 kids (2 and 4) and his wife cheated on him. He sought counselling at the time with her, however she was adament that there was to be no reconcilliation.
He continued to see a therapist up until we met about 2 months ago...
He still contacts his wife weekly to see his children once a fortnight...
Im worried i am just a rebound??? I really see myself falling for this guy... (link)
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I can understand why you are concerned. After all, you don't want to end up falling for a guy who will end up breaking your heart.
However, if this man's wife cheated on him and this happened more than two months ago, I doubt he is still on the rebound. Perhaps he met you and realised a good thing when he saw it. The problem is, you won't know until you talk to him about it? I'm not saying you have to come straight out with "Do you really like me or am I just a rebound?" but perhaps you could say something along the lines of "I really like you but I need to know where this relationship is going." Once he has answered that, tell him you are concerned that he is still getting over the breakdown of his marriage and that it might be too soon for him to be pursuing a serious relationship. See what he says to this but make it clear that you have real feelings for him and that is why you need to know the answers to these questions now.
Please also bear in mind that sexual chemistry is a wonderful thing but it can fizzle out very quickly if there is nothing else there. You don't want to rush into a relationship with a man based mostly on sexual chemistry, especially when there is so much 'baggage' that comes with him. Perhaps you should take things slowly for the moment and avoid the sexual side of the relationship until you have cemented something more.
Whatever you decide to do, make sure you have a talk with him about the direction of the relationship and talk until your mind is at ease. As soon as you know where he feels the relationship is going, you can start to relax.
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