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i need help.
okay well me and my boyfriend have been going out for like 27 months or so and its been pretty great. we have broken up a couple of times but for different reasons. and lately we have been arguing alot. like alot. and i have tlked to him about it on a number of occasions and then he apoligizes and everything is okay for like a week.. then it happens again. well i do love him. but we have been going out for so long and these are suppose to be the best years of our lives so i want to just kind of see what else is out there and have fun and not be tied down all of highschool. who knows? maybe the one for me is right there in front of me. well i have broken up with him and everytime i just go right back to him. either because i miss him or just plain jealousy bc i dont like seeing him with other girls. i dont know what to do. is the break-up a good idea? and if it is what do i say. another problem if we do breakup i know i will be a bit emotional and last time i did i cried alot and my mom just blamed the whole thing on me and thought as if i just wanted attention or something because my family likes him alot. i can see a future with it but do u think i should see what else is out there and if he is the one i want to be with just go back to him? i dont know. HELP!!!
signed,
very confused
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
continously going back to him doesn't mean he's your one. i think it's more like he is your comfort zone, what you are familiar with, and it's hard to move on with something like that. i know, too.
i say, take the break. take a break from the fighting. cool off, see other people for a while. yes, that means seeing him with other girls. avoid him and focus on your OWN life.
when you feel the urge to go back... hold yourself back. remember why you broke up in the first place. getting back together with him only feels good temporarily, then it will be back to "oh, this is why i wanted to break up with him." honestly. right?
please try to see what else is out there. if you guys grow and change, maybe later (as in months/years) you could try it again. if you want to try later and he doesn't, or vice versa, it wasn't meant to be.
you have to be strong, or you'll be stuck in this cycle. you can do what you set your mind to. good luck!
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If you are feeling the urge to see other people or see what is out there and if things are really that bad with your boyfriend then the best thing you can do is to break it off. I know that sounds terrible and I usually do encourage people to work things through but if you have broken up already a couple of times, perhaps for now you are better off apart. I don't know what these issues are that you are fighting over but it might be that some time apart will give you the opportunity to individually work through them and then, if in time you want to get back together, you can.
However, you need to stop going back to him. I know it is difficult when you care a lot about someone but more than anything else, it's really toying with each other's emotions because you will always be wondering "Are we going to break up again?" This alone is going to make it difficult not to argue.
I really think you need to take some time apart and when I say some time, I mean a few months. I know you're probably horrified at the idea but I think the space would do you both good and it would give you a chance to see what else is out there without worrying about hurting him. BUT. You need to get over your jealousy! I know it's hard to do but if you really want to see what else is out there, you need to deal with it and do what you want to do.
Also, if you do break up, you have every right to cry about it!!! Breaking up with someone doesn't mean they are the only ones that suffer! You are entitled to be upset.
Have a think about it. I really do think a time apart would do you both good.
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hey. the question is, are you happy with him? do you have a good time with him? if you feel like there is really no connection between you too anymore then dont be afraid to end the relationship. dont be afraid to be emotional if you do break up with him, anyone would be. if you love him and you really want the relationship to continue then go ahead, stay together. talk to him, say that when you fight, it is bad and then everything just goes back to normal, and then the fighting starts again. ask him if he relizes this. say that you dont like it and you want to have a peaceful relationship. maybe this will open his eyes and you guys can be happy. just follow your heart. good luck. hope this helps!! :] ♥ ♥ ♥
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