Seriously? Take 3 or 4 shots? That's an interesting one.

I also would not suggest anxiety pills. I have them, and when I have to take one I get sleepy, my thought processes slow and my speech starts slurring. Not the best look for a big speech.

The best thing you can do is practice, practice, practice. Know that stuff front and back until you could give the speech in your sleep, then practice it some more. That way you'll be less likely to draw a blank or to read from your notes too much.

Another thing is to remember that this is only one tiny part of your life. If you find yourself worrying, tell yourself that in just a little while it will be over and you won't have to do it again. What's 5-10 minutes in the grand scheme of things, right?

Some people say to picture the audience in their underwear. I like to pretend that they're not there, or that I know all of them and that I'm comfortable with them.

Conquering the fear of public speaking is a really great idea. There will be times in your future where you may have to use those skills, and it's great to have some practice.

Wait it out. See your counselor. See what they have to say. I know this feels like forever, but things can and do turn around.

Those feelings of being useless and not wanting to be around people? They're caused by your depression. They aren't you. You are still the life and soul of the party, you're just sort of hidden for now. Counselling will help you to bring yourself out from hibernation.

Don't expect counselling to work overnight. It might take some time. It might not be all that you need. Be open to taking medication that's prescribed to you. If you are prescribed antidepressants, know that they do take up to a few months to really kick in, but once they do you might not need to be on them forever.

The best advice I can give you is to try to force yourself into a routine. Goodness knows that the first thing I want to do when I'm in a depressive phase is to sit around in my underpants on the couch playing Mass Effect and eating Ben and Jerry's. Something valuable I was taught during my counselling is that I need to maintain a schedule. Set an alarm and get out of bed every day at the same time, so you don't spend the whole day in bed. Get at least an hour of exercise a day, because it's proven to help lift your mood. Eat healthy and at regular times. Celebrate the little things you accomplish, like showering or weeding the garden. Force yourself out of the house every day, even just to do some grocery shopping. Things like that will help you get back on track.

Your fiancee and your little guy need you. They'll still be there for you when you get out of the fog. If anything was to happen to you, they'd be missing you forever. Take comfort in that, because not everybody has someone to miss them. And you always have us on Advicenators :)

Lots of people go through this in their lifetime. You will make it through too!

I remember your first question! This was exactly what I was worried about for you.

You need to sit down with her over coffee and find out exactly what, financially, she's expecting of you. Ask about hairdos, makeup, manicures, shoes, travel, etc. Tell her that with the state of the economy and your finances, you want to make sure you can afford to be there for her before you get in too deep. Don't be embarrassed about this. It's so common for people to be in a tight squeeze financially these days, and it's more embarrassing to end up being unable to get to the wedding because it's a choice between gas money and rent for the month. See if there are any concessions she'll make. Custom-dyed shoes- how about each girl wearing a pair of nice black shoes? Vegas? Oooh, how about a girls' camping weekend?

If you can't afford it and she won't budge, don't go broke. Gracefully bow out, tell her that you are so honoured to have been chosen and that you'd love to help with preparations, but that you just can't afford to financially support the wedding that she wants.

It's unfair for people to expect those in their wedding party to pick up the tab. You want a fancy wedding with all the bells and whistles, you'd better be prepared to pay for it yourself! I totally echo your sentiments, but for the sake of your friendship it's probably best to hold back and be as nice as possible.

If your friend is miffed because you can't afford the Kitchen-Aid mixer on her registry, she's a real piece of work. A lovely hand-made gift (use your talents!) can go over really nicely. I hand-trimmed a set of facecloths and towels for the girl I was a bridesmaid to, and gave her each set at the three (THREE!) bridal showers she had. She knew that I was flat broke at the time, and she appreciated the hours of work that went into them.

I'm going to try my best to approach this from a place of non-judgment, so bear with me.

I get that it's nice to feel wanted. I do. And I'm not so far from 13 years old that I forget how hormonal I was at that age. Sex was a new and exciting idea, and anything that reminded me of it was fascinating and positive. So I know where you're coming from. I understand why you're getting aroused by this guy's behaviour.

I can tell you that when you're a little older and more experienced, you would regret having sex with this guy. He has no respect for you. He doesn't care about you at all. He's treating you like a piece of meat with a hole in it, not like a human being. You're not a walking vagina. You're a person with thoughts, feelings and a personality. Trust me when I say that you will enjoy sex a lot more when you do experience it if the person you experience it with cares about you as a person.

If you do have sex with this guy, I can tell you it will be disappointing. It would probably last about 30 seconds. You would panic about pregnancy, about STIs and about not being a virgin any more. He wouldn't put any real effort into pleasing you. He probably wouldn't care if he hurt you, either emotionally or physically. He wouldn't want you after his conquest. He views you as easy pickings and is trying to take advantage of your hormonally driven thought processes.

Someone who cares will take the time and effort to make you feel good on the inside and the outside. Wait for that person. I'm not saying wait until marriage. I'm not saying "You're a baby!". I'm telling you that this isn't the right person. When you find a guy who cares about you, who makes you laugh, who treats you like a lady and would be there for you if something goes wrong, that's someone to think about having sex with.

I get that you get horny. It happens to almost all of us, especially at that age. Being horny isn't a reason to have sex. Take care of your urges yourself. I can guarantee that at this stage in your life, it'll be the most fulfilling sexual activity you could have.

I'm also not going to try to shame you over your fantasies. Rape fantasies are pretty common, and have more to do with power play than with violence. The fantasy is a glamourized version of the actual thing, which is really a horrible, horrible thing. When this guy says he's going to rape you, that's not a good thing. It's not sexy. Playing out fantasies with a committed partner is sexy. Being attacked and used by a near stranger isn't.

My advice to you is to stop letting yourself be an object. You're more than just your body. Don't let people touch you just because it feels good to be wanted and liked. Save that privilege for the right guy, the one who deserves it. Tell your teacher that you're being sexually harassed by these guys, and that you aren't comfortable with it. This is a serious matter, and even though you went along with it, it can still be considered illegal depending on where you live, and especially in schools.

Respect yourself. You are a fantastic human being with a lot to offer the world. You're selling yourself short when you hide behind your body. Let people like you for your sense of humour, your kindness, your intelligence.

It all depends on what your campus defines as a disability.

I know that my school counts mental health issues as disabilities (if they're impacting your schoolwork) and makes allowances. I'm working on my anxiety, OCD and bipolar disorder all at once, and when I've been in school they've helped me out by doing things like extending deadlines or letting me write exams in different rooms with more time.

Thank you for remembering invisible disabilities! Just because you can't see them doesn't mean they don't impact peoples' lives every day.

I've never liked labels for this very reason.

Would you introduce yourself by how tall you are, what genre of books you read or any other part of your self? Never. So why struggle to find a definition for your sexuality?

I get where you're coming from. I've been there. I've tried to figure out if I'm straight, gay, pansexual? What it all boiled down to for me is that I fall for people, not their parts. It might be different for you. In the meantime, why box yourself in with classifications? Date around. Find a person you like, and spend time with them.

For the record, I'm going to agree with you on the penis thing even though I'm married to a wonderful man. They're pretty weird looking. Definitely not aesthetically pleasing!

It absolutely can. When the body aborts a pregnancy on its own, it's called a miscarriage. Sometimes it's caused by problems with the pregnancy, sometimes it just happens. It will generally look like a large blood clot when it's an early term pregnancy.

My mother always told me that you either do something because of someone else or in spite of them. This is a case where you do something in spite of someone.

The best thing you can do is say nuts to what your father thinks and show him what you can do. Use his nastiness as fuel and show him up with your success. It's just a matter of turning around what he says and using it to empower you, not to belittle you.

Personally, I would leave the necklace for an anniversary.

His birthday is about him. To get both of you a present would be a little odd. I may just be biased because I love my e-reader though ;)

Sorry it took me a little while to answer this one. I was having trouble pulling up the site.

I'm sure he does love anyone playing with his junk. You know what I'd love? Not doing any chores ever again. Things would get gross fast, and my husband would be pretty angry if he had to start pulling my weight.

Just because you like something doesn't give you license to do it. If you like eating five pounds of chocolate for dinner every day, you could do it if you were on your own without harming anyone else. When you're in a relationship with someone else, though, they might resent the fact that they don't get to eat a proper dinner, or that you've ballooned to a size XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXL. See where I'm coming from?

I get that you love him. It's just not right for you to sacrifice so much because you love him, and him to not be able to keep it in his pants. If he can't be happy while giving this up, then he might have to give you up.

You're absolutely right about when you live together and have kids. That's why you need to set boundaries now. If it's bothering you, it needs to be addressed. No matter how much you love him, nothing is worth being cheated on for the rest of your life.

Relationships are all about compromise. Sometimes one person has to give something up to make the other person happy. If all the sacrifice is on one side, it's not a healthy relationship.

Try looking at it with another, hypothetical, example.

If you wanted children and your boyfriend didn't, you would have some serious issues. If you didn't have children, you would go through life miserable because it's one of your highest priorities. If you did have children, he'd be miserable because he's saddled with extra responsibility, taking care of children he never wanted in the first place. Sure, one of you could sacrifice to make the other happy, but it's a really, really big sacrifice to make. In that case, you'd probably just say "Okay, we have different priorities in life and won't be able to work in harness", and you'd go your separate ways.

In this case, he's okay with fooling around on the side and you aren't. If it's so important to him that he will force you to sacrifice your happiness in order to keep the relationship going and keep his extra nooky, you're probably not going to work well together in the future. This isn't either of your fault. You just have fundamentally different values, and that can be a dealbreaker for relationships.

All of that said, if I were you I would have a good talk with him. Tell him it's a dealbreaker for you to have him carrying on like this. Set clear boundaries as to what you're okay with and what you're not. Let him explain his side of things, but remain firm and let him know how awful it makes you feel when you're left behind while he fools around. If he refuses to let his something on the side go even though he knows it makes you unhappy, he might not be the best life partner. In that case, I would move on and find someone who was more compatible with me.

Non-monogamy works for some people. For others, not so much. Relationships between both types often fail for these reasons.

It all depends on the relationship.

If you are in an open relationship and have mutually decided that it's okay to do this, it's not cheating. If you're in a monogamous relationship and aren't comfortable with your partner fooling around, they shouldn't be doing so.

If your boyfriend is being active with others (even if it's another guy and they're not having full-on sex), the most important thing for you is to make sure that you're safe. Don't have any unprotected sexual contact of any type with your boyfriend as long as he's fooling around with other people.

If you're not happy with the situation, you need to give him the ultimatum. Either he stops or your relationship does. This isn't something that you can just deal with if it's not your cup of tea. If you are okay with it, then make sure that both of you are being safe and that you keep checking in with each other to make sure that nobody's harbouring resentments.

We're not going to suggest that you kill yourself. It's not what we do here.

This is exactly why I don't advocate dating below a certain age. You get mixed up in all sorts of emotional stuff that you're not ready to handle, and fill your head with exes and sex when you should be concentrating on being a kid and getting through school.

This isn't a lecture, though. I'm here to help.

If you're not happy with your current relationship, end it. Don't feel like a bad person. It's not a bad thing to end a relationship that you don't see going anywhere, or one that's sapping you of all your energy. I would suggest you taking a hiatus from dating for a set period of time. At one point in high school, I decided that I would not date until Grade 12. It meant that I wasn't constantly trying to impress boys, wasn't wasting energy on relationships that likely wouldn't last, and wasn't putting myself at risk with sexual activity. It worked for me: I was able to focus on school, work and extracurricular activities. Just a suggestion.

Nothing is the end of the world. Any failure can be overcome. I should know: I have failed out of university or college several times (for circumstances beyond my control). Of course, I've been devastated each time, but with the benefit of hindsight I'm able to move on. I'm even going back to school this fall to give it another shot!

I get that parents put a huge amount of strain on you. I had mine giving me the "You'll be flipping burgers" lecture on a regular basis. You need to find a way to distance yourself from outside pressures. Find a safe place (a tidy, comfy corner of your room, the library, a nearby park) where you can relax. If the pressure gets to be too much, remove yourself and take a while to smell the roses. Read a book or listen to some music. Take a walk.

To keep on track for school, find a good place to study. Pair up with a smart friend if you're having trouble with the coursework, or ask your teacher. Some older students may do free tutoring. Don't work yourself to the bone. Leave time for fun stuff, but set a certain amount of time to do schoolwork each day so that it doesn't creep up on you. Make a schedule and stick to it as best you can so that everything gets covered. Also, you get diminishing returns from working harder past a certain point. It makes no sense to kill yourself trying to get 100% when you've got a 90%. Set a reasonable goal and aim for that instead of the whole hog.

Nothing is worth killing yourself over. Eventually, you will look back and wonder what you ever saw in your ex, and why you felt so strongly about your breakup. You'll look back on school and remember the fun times, not the hard times. Give yourself a chance to live out your life, because you've hardly started yet.

There is no quick, easy, painless way to die. That's because no matter what the end of your life is like, it won't be quick, easy and painless for all of those who know and love you. They would all hurt forever, wondering why you didn't come to them first. So reach out to your family and friends when you're struggling. If they're not the emotional sort, you can also call local teen help or suicide lines. They can help talk you down in a pinch. Or post here looking for advice on the tough spots. It's what we're here for.

So that's my (long) answer. Take time for you, break your schoolwork down into more digestible chunks, aim for "good enough" and don't forget to reach out.

You'll know you're being sexual too often if it's getting in the way of you two spending time together in a way that allows you to get to know each other better.

Relationships are supposed to develop as you learn more about each other and share experiences. If you never talk because you're always attached at the face, that's not going to happen. As soon as the hormones slow down, you'll have some catching up to do and you may be disappointed if Prince Charming is really a toad.

Enjoy the rush of hormones, be safe and have fun. Just don't forget about the other parts of a relationship.

Nobody should really be giving you the answers, because that would be academic dishonesty. That said, we can definitely help you get the right start!

Using question A as an example, it's a simple matter of looking to see what the two equations have in common.

There's a +4b in the first, and a -4b in the second, right? So we rearrange the equations to isolate those.

4b = -3 - 3a
4b = 6 + 5a

Now, those two are equivalent, because 4b = 4b.

-3 - 3a = 6 + 5a
8 a = -9

As you correctly discovered, a = -9/8. Where did you go wrong? Well, there were two variables, were there not? You have to use your value for a to find b by plugging it into one of the original equations.

3(-9/8) + 4b = -3

Now you can solve!

As for the second one, I'm really not sure how you got the answer you did. Try isolating x, because it's the easiest one. Use the same procedure as above, and you should have no problems.

Well, there is one thing that we can do. We can educate ourselves, no matter what side of the debate we're on.

Check your information. Is it coming from legitimate sources, or from some dude in his basement with a paranoia complex, a Geocities account and too much time on his hands?

The problem you'll find is that the real information is buried under a mountain of conspiracy theory websites. Why is this? Because there isn't actually any scientific proof that chemtrails are a thing.

There are real reasons to fly a plane in unusual patterns. Crop dusting, cloud seeding and firefighting are all possible culprits. Those trails you see coming off of airplanes aren't CHEMtrails, they're CONtrails... condensation trails. It happens when the exhaust from an engine cools and causes a cloud to form. Harmless clouds. No added (beyond usual exhaust) chemicals, no aluminum, no conspiracies.

There are lots of people out there who like to scare others simply for lack of education. Your toothpaste won't kill you. Neither will water fluoridation, and neither will the Freemasons. Understanding is a powerful weapon over ignorance like this.

So yes, you can do something for your fellow citizens. Look before you leap. Check your sources. Don't incite panic if it's unnecessary. Just think: if you can keep someone else from being bamboozled the way you were, you're doing something good for society!

They exist because safe sex extends to more than just genital-to-genital contact. STIs can be transmitted by oral sex as well as anal or regular sex, so it's important to keep yourself protected no matter what you're doing. They're flavoured because, well, have you ever tasted a normal condom? Ick.

What does it feel like? Pretty overrated, in my opinion. I know that my first time I was like, "Oh, that's it? THAT is what all the fuss was about?"

It's fairly uncomfortable. It's awkward. For some it hurts. Unless you really care about the person you're with, it won't be a pleasant experience, and that follows through for sex afterwards. Imagine being naked, 2 inches away from some acquaintance or stranger for a half hour. Awkward, right?

Nobody ever feels 100% ready. It's a big decision because you can only make it once, so it's natural to question it. If you're going to lose your virginity for the sake of losing it, don't bother because you'll be disappointed. Wait until that special person is there to take the journey with you.

And this is why they warn people against ditching their friends for their boyfriend. It happens to all of us at some point or another, so don't worry too much!

I'm going to disagree with JustJess. It's perfectly normal to have friends outside your relationship. Each partner needs to keep their own separate life to a certain extent. Sure, it's nice to meet friends of your boyfriend's, but if there are some you don't like or if you don't enjoy doing what they do, you'll come off as the cranky girlfriend who can't let your boyfriend off his leash. Not fun for anyone.

So, how to make friends. I'm in the middle of trying to make some new friends for a different reason, so here's what's working for me:

Of course, there's the option of reconnecting with old friends. They might be pissed off at being left behind, but a simple apology will clear up a lot of things.

There are also lots of ways to make new friends. Do you work? Start trying to make a connection with your coworkers. I work a part-time job mostly for the social aspect of it. You could try signing up for a class that interests you, like yoga, pottery, creative writing or cooking. Another great way to meet friends is to volunteer. Anywhere where you'll be gathering with people with shared interests is a good place to find friends. It does take time, but when it starts paying off it's worth it.

You'll need to keep yourself occupied while your boyfriend's away anyhow, so why not pick up a new hobby or two? In my time alone at home I've picked up knitting, crocheting and sewing. It's my me-time, where I get to peck away at whatever project I'm working at or play video games with nobody to nag me to get up and do the dishes :) Try to stop thinking of it as abandonment and start thinking of it as a much-needed break.

You need to slow down and take one thing at a time.

Your first priority is your living situation. If things are over and you need a place to stay, try contacting your local YWCA or women's shelter. There are lots of resources for women that can help you by giving you a place to stay while you get a job and get on your feet.

As for adopting a child, this isn't the time to do it. A child deserves a home that is stable and happy. A mother in transition like you are won't be able to give a child everything they need. Wait until you have a job and can support yourself, and until you have a place to live at the very least. Most adoption agencies won't allow you to adopt unless you meet certain qualifications.

If you're having trouble finding a job because of lack of experience, try volunteering. If you love children and teaching, you could work with kids in an after-school program, or in a daycare. Look around and see what opportunities there are. It can give you valuable experience and a sense of fulfillment.

Suicide is not a good option for you. No matter how much the odds seem to be stacked against you, there's always a way to make your situation better.

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.

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