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I'd like to make friends,but how?
Well,I have a boyfriend,he has so many friends and hasn't stopped meeting them as well as hanging out with them since we first met,I just felt like giving more importance to the relationship from the very beginning of it,so I started to lose contact with everyone of them,all of a sudden I realized I was completely alone,just my partner and I.So now I'd like to get them back or make more friends I don't know,it's not fair that my bf can still have his friends and I don't,I'm feeling like I was only devoted to him,I don't wanna do that anymore,there are some weekends when he goes to parties or nightclubs along with his friends and I just stay home watching a movie with my cat:(the whole night thinking about my friends and all the things we used to do together back then when I was a single one.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Its not fair that your boyfriend still gets to have the fun he used to have with his friends and you don't.When you are in a relationship with the person you love,it doesn't mean that you have to forget the other people you love that were your friends before you met your boy friend.Your boyfriend is doing the right thing.He is finding time for both a relationship with the girl he loves and and for his friends.I think you should do the same.For exampl,you and your boyfriend can arrange a day a week for each one of you guys to spend time with your friends.Call your girl friends and make plans with them where you can catch up and have fun together.Its as simple as that.Do the things you used to do with your friends before you were dating,maybe that will remind you guys of the old days and bring you even close with them.You never know,they might be missing you as much as you miss them.Goodluck :)xx
A.I
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And this is why they warn people against ditching their friends for their boyfriend. It happens to all of us at some point or another, so don't worry too much!
I'm going to disagree with JustJess. It's perfectly normal to have friends outside your relationship. Each partner needs to keep their own separate life to a certain extent. Sure, it's nice to meet friends of your boyfriend's, but if there are some you don't like or if you don't enjoy doing what they do, you'll come off as the cranky girlfriend who can't let your boyfriend off his leash. Not fun for anyone.
So, how to make friends. I'm in the middle of trying to make some new friends for a different reason, so here's what's working for me:
Of course, there's the option of reconnecting with old friends. They might be pissed off at being left behind, but a simple apology will clear up a lot of things.
There are also lots of ways to make new friends. Do you work? Start trying to make a connection with your coworkers. I work a part-time job mostly for the social aspect of it. You could try signing up for a class that interests you, like yoga, pottery, creative writing or cooking. Another great way to meet friends is to volunteer. Anywhere where you'll be gathering with people with shared interests is a good place to find friends. It does take time, but when it starts paying off it's worth it.
You'll need to keep yourself occupied while your boyfriend's away anyhow, so why not pick up a new hobby or two? In my time alone at home I've picked up knitting, crocheting and sewing. It's my me-time, where I get to peck away at whatever project I'm working at or play video games with nobody to nag me to get up and do the dishes :) Try to stop thinking of it as abandonment and start thinking of it as a much-needed break.
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Hey there,
You're right it isn't fair that he has a great circle of friends and your left on your own.
Whats stopping you from going with him?
mixing with his group of friends?getting him to introduce you to some of his friends?
It's not natural that he keeps his girlfriend and friends separate. I mean my boyfriend hangs out with me and my friends all the time and vice versa. Talk to your boyfriend about how your feeling alone and left out. Tell him how much you miss your friends and having a social life. He is bound to understand.
In the meantime why not get back in contact with your old friends?see how they're doing what they are up to? maybe ask to hang out ? talk about old times to break the ice.
apologize for losing contact. say that you didn't mean to come across as the type that forgets all about their friends but you were just so excited about having a new relationship. It happens if they are good friends they will understand.
If that doesn't work or is not an option why not think about taking up a hobby? something that will allow you to meet new people?
have a think about it :)
best of luck and I hoped I helped.
If you have anymore questions feel free to inbox me.
Much <3
Jess 18/f
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