Hi. I need some guy advice. There is this guy I really like, and have liked for quite some time, but I keep getting mixed signals from him. We are both seniors in high school. He is a little on the quiet side, and is really sweet. We have several classes together, and we have slowly become better friends, considering that we never really talked before the beginning of the school year despite having gone to the same high school for 3 years. So, we are friends now, and I am now good friends with his friends, and it seems like they would really like for us to get together, and one is especially encouraging it. He's friendly to me, and mildly flirtatious, but he's not the flirty type and doesn't go around and just flirt with everyone. I took the iniative to tell some people that I liked him, so that it would get back to him. I'm pretty sure he knows now, but I don't know what to do next. We hang out on the weekends alot, because our groups of friends are similar and they always get together. He's kind of shy and isn't the kind of guy who is always asking girls out. I can't even think of who is last girlfriend was, or if he had one. I really think we would make a great couple, and I at least want to give it a chance. I am somewhat shy myself when I am in uncomfortable situations or when I get nervous, but I am finally starting to feel comfortable around him. How do I get him to ask me out, or to be able to tell if he likes me?? Sometimes I think he likes me, and then the rest of the time he just leaves me confused. Please, this isn't just a silly little crush, I need some advice on what to do. Thanks in advance for your advice.
I don't consider flirting to be a sure sign of interest, so don't worry :) A lot of guys flirt just because it's fun, a lot of guys can't, no matter how hard they try. However, there are ways to tell whether or not a guy really likes you, even if his jaw happens to be wired shut...
For example: met a man at a company party. After we were introduced he made sure that he sat next to me and talked to me during the meal. I saw him later at my grandparents' Christmas party. We didn't have the opportunity to talk very often, on account of so many people, but he never seemed to be too far away. Once, I was struggling with an uncooperative trash-can. Despite the fact that he was standing on the other side of the room, and there were other people not too far away, he immediately rushed to my assistance.
In summary: if I guy is interested in you, whether he can flirt or not, he'll make an attempt to get to know you. Even when you are both surrounded by other people, he will be attentive. Does he go out of his way to be helpful?
Sometimes, it's still hard to read between the lines. So, maybe you should give it some time. Observe him. Okay, maybe he doesn't flirt, but what has he been doing that you may not have noticed?
I normally try to discourage my girlfriends from asking guys out. Reason being, I think that when a girl aks a guy out, usually, she often becomes aggressive in his eyes, and thus turns him off. It's a big accomplishment for a guy when he gets the girl he wants, and sometimes, if she initiates something first, he might feel robbed of his accomplishment.
However, if said guy is really shy, a think an exception can be made. If he doesn't ask you out after a little while, and your still suspecting that he's interested, go ahead and make the first move. Just be patient and wait for a moment when you're feeling more confident, and not so nervous :)
I would also like to say that, if you're worried that he knows you like him and hasn't asked you out...Don't be. If a friend told me that so-and-so liked me, I probably wouldn't put much stock in it. Maybe he hasn't either.
Hope it goes well for you ;)
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I am 21 and my fiancee is 25.I am a female. My fiancee and I have been together going on eight years in July 2005. There is not enough love making and not hardly enough sugary stuff.(kissing, hugging, sweet nothings) He seems to be tired all the time! Well now I'm tired. Am I being to demanding? What should I do to let him know I need romance without offending him?
Go to the bookstore and look for books written by John Gray, Ph.D. You've probably heard of him, he wrote the book, "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus." While that is a really great book, he's also wrote a lot of other books, some of them specifically discussing sexual intimacy. I trust him because he's a very smart man :)
And, please don't feel weird about buying self-help books. You and your fiancee have been together for a long time, and this type of problem is normal. Happens to everyone. (No, you're not being too demanding either.)
Best of luck ;)
(I just read my answer and it sounds like I didn't answer your question. My point was, Dr. Gray will tell you the best way to state your request without offending your fiancee. After all, he is a man, and I'm sure he's heard it too :P)
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My heart is broken. My friends do not speak to me. People at school believe I won't fight back. What do I do when nothign is right anymore? It is impossible to be myself. This world is full critics. You think this is overreacting? You're wrong. I don't know how I go from day to day. All eyes that land on me judge me for what I look like. Well, that is completely incorrect. If only you could hear what they say. It does not make me depressed, It is not the people out there, but in my own home which make me weep at night. My own parents! People accuse me of witchcraft, drugs, cutting, and stealing(among other things that don't even cross my mind). How would you feel if everyone you thought loved you, began to look on you with pity and disgust. It's unbearable! What should I do? My nights are dark, but my days are even darker.
Signed-
Longing for the Stars
I know that advicenators.com suggests that people keep their questions short and sweet. Something about how people are more likely to answer them...blah, blah, blah...
I think it's hard to give advice when you don't really know what all the problem is. I understand that you are depressed, that you seem to be suffering attack after attack from the people who are supposed to care about you...But why? When did it start? How? Why do they think that? What makes them think that they can treat you that way?
I'd really like to know what's going on. So if you'd really like to tell me, leave me a lengthy letter in my inbox. Feel free to start at the beginning and include every detail that you think is relevant. I'll read it is it's sixteen pages long. (Might take me a couple of days to respond though ;)
Until then, bless you :D
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I have a serious problem. I am a twenty one year old grown woman who can't make friends. I am happy with my husband to be and I love myself my dog and my family. I am a full time college student but I stay off campus. I just don't make friends easily. Never have. We just sort of fell into each other. I have no friends besides my fiancee. Can anyone suggest some hints or advice that can put in the direction of making some life long friends?
First, go out. But don't just go anywhere.
You need to go to some place where your odds of meeting other people, with similiar personalities, is greater. For example, if you're quiet and shy, don't go to a bar or club. Join a book club instead. (Less people in a more comfortable atmosphere. Gives you the opportunity to melt the ice at your own pace.) If you are religious, don't just go to church. Join a Sunday school class. If your not religious, but very kindly, try volunteer work. (If you don't make friends easily, try to get involved in a small group. The smaller, the more intimate, and thus more likely to make new friends.)
I'm not sure what you mean by, "don't make friends easily." Are you shy? Or are you not shy, you just don't talk much? Whatever it is, I've noticed this...
A lot of times, we are aquainted with certain people, and it never goes very far. We can't even pass them on the street and acknowledge their presence. Why? I'm not really sure. But whatever it is, we all need to get over it. So, when a person that you recognize walks into a room, first acknowledge their presence. It doesn't have to be anything major.
If you a see person often, and maybe know there name, whether you think they know your's or not, introduce yourself. This opens the window for communication. If you don't like to talk to yourself, ask a lot of polite, safe questions. Try to find something about that person that you can relate too. Now you have established that you have something in common.
Once you find out what you have in common, invite them to lunch. Or to dinner at your house so they can meet your fiancee. And I'm sure your catching my drift now and know precisely where this is going.
I would also like to add that, if your self esteem is suffering from your lack of friends...Don't let it. This doesn't mean that anything is wrong with you. In fact, your normal. The older you get, the more difficult it is to make friends. It's not because other people dislike you, it's because we're all older and a lot busier and sometimes we get so wound up with work, relationships, etc. that we forget what a joy a friendship can be.
I wish you luck, and my hope for the best ;) Adieu...
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just warning you, this may get long!
last night me and my boyfriend of nearly 3 years were in my room and sleeping. not fooling around, literally sleeping. then my dad comes in and freaks out bitching like we had sex or something.
the situation is that i'm the only girl in the family and they treat me like crap. i do the dishes almost every night, take care of my sick grandma, do the laundry, clean the house, and do well in school yet they still look down upon me like i can't be trusted. i am a very responsible girl and i have had enough of them snooping through my room and checking up on me.
the only possible reason why i think they could be acting like this is that we don't communicate very well with each other, let alone get along. maybe bitching is their way of talking to me? even so, that doesn't explain the overprotectiveness!
my question is what can i do to make them trust me? i feel like i've done everything, all ending in failure.
i used to really HATE them for what they put me through, but when they made an effort to BE NICE things got better. our relationship has improved over the past two of months, but after what happened last night, my grudge against them has returned.
please help, i don't know what else i can do. it seems like nothing is ever good enough for them...
-frustrated
You are right, you are an adult and you deserve to be trusted.
I am not from a traditional asian family, but I am from a conservative Christian family. I understand that this is not the same, you probably have it a lot rougher than I ever did. However, there are a few things that I would like to point out.
I am twenty-two and still my parents little girl. They were over-protective in the past, and though things have changed between us, they always will be to a degree. This is probably the same for you. It doesn't matter how old you get, you will always be their child. And please try to remember that, being a parent is scary this day in age. There is a lot that parents want to protect their children from. Alchol, drugs, violence, sexually transmitted diseases, and early pregnancy.
I am only pointing this out because, maybe if you can understand where they are coming from it will be easier to help them understand where you are.
I realize that you and your boyfriend were not doing anything wrong. You have a right to feel indignant, they shouldn't have jumped to conclusions. But they did. And as long as you are living in their house, you have to make allowances for such behavior, no matter how ridiculous it is.
For example, I am in my early twenties and currently living with my grandparents and mother. My family knows that I am not a virgin. However, the idea of me sleeping with a man in their home makes them uncomfortable. (Even if I am only sleeping in the same bed and not engaging in sexual activity.) Because of this, I do not allow any male to sleep in my room. If a situation arose where a male friend or boyfriend needed or wanted to spend the night at my house, I would ask him to comply with their rules. Which means, sleeping on the couch or in the guest bedroom.
One way for you to get them to trust you is to show them that you respect their feelings. I don't know how you feel about this, but if I were you I would first apologize and tell them that you understand how they feel. THEN explain the situation. (Again, this might not be good advice, I don't know how they would react.)
As for the excessive chores and responsibilities, I assume this largely has to do with your family's culture. I don't know what to say about this, except for maybe, when things between you improve and the time seems right, express to them that you feel overwhelmed by your chores and would appreciate some help. (Again, I don't know if that's possible.)
About the bitching, I assume this does come from an inability to communicate well. I'm also guessing that this inability to communicate comes from a cultural gap. Your parents are still living by their asian traditions. While I am sure your recognize these traditions, you also have to realize that you have one foot in another culture.
All I can really suggest is trying to understand them while you are under their roof, and if that gets unbearable, maybe you need to get out from under their roof. I fear I may not have been much help, but if you would like to discuss the matter further please leave a note in my inbox or feedback. I wish you the best of luck, and I hope things get better for you ;)
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what do you do as a parent about your young teenage daughter who cannot control their mouths or do what you ask of them..and all they ever want is to shop wat is up with that?
First, I'm not a parent. But I do remember what it was like to be a teenager.
All teens rebel at some point in some way. This is normal. What she is trying to do, perhaps without knowing it, is attempting to establish her own individuality and independence.
During my rebellious faze, I didn't argue with my parents or ever get into any kind of trouble. I did however get a couple of tattoos, pierce my ears, and do a lot of things that I knew I shouldn't. Looking back I realized that by doing these things, I was announcing to the world that I was a separate entity from my parents. I could think for myself, decide for myself, and make my own mistakes.
I'm not making excuses for my behavior, nor am I making excuses for the behavior of your daughter. I could have announced all those things to the world in a better fashion, and some of those mistakes that I wish I hadn't made had some serious consequences. (For example: I am now a smoker. Very, very stupid.) But that's the problem with hindsight.
You're right. Just because your daughter is trying to find herself doesn't excuse her behavior. Acting towards you in a disrespectful manner is both inconsiderate and not very wise. And, she should also respect that when she shops, she is spending you're hard earned cash.
I can only tell you what my parents did. My parents sensed that I was on my journey to become an adult. During this time they tried to understand what I was feeling and thinking. They also tried to accept me for who I was, and allow me to make my own mistakes. They also taught me the value of a dollar.
The fact they tried to understand me made me want to try to understand them. The fact that they accepted me allowed me to accept myself. When they allowed me to get a job, they taught me the value of a dollar. Buying my own clothes not only saved them money, but it made me more independent. In the end, I realized that my bad behavior wasn't necessary. Our relationship isn't perfect, but we've come a long way.
I'm sorry if I'm not a lot of help. I hope that you find the answers that you're looking for and are able to improve the circumstances between you and your daughter. However, I would also like to point out that you might want to try looking elsewhere for advice. Most of the people who frequent this site are still in their teens.
Best wishes ;)
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I dont know what to think or do. I had seen this guy at a local gas station, smiled and waved all the time. I guess he talked with a friend of mine that worked there, and showed up at my house to see what I was up to later that night. I had to work, so he said he would try to call me,but he just moved into this new place and didn't have a phone yet. He did call that night and we talked. Saturday night he called me to see if I wanted to hang out. I went over to his place with a friend. We talk and hung out for hours. He put some romantic music on and we danced down in his basement, with all his friends upstairs. We kissed and he did ask me if I wanted to sleep over,but didn't pressure me at all. He also was very understanding when I said I didn't want too. So he made plans with me to meet up the next day. We hung out all day Sunday,he even broke plans with his friends. I haven't really talk with him since, but our work schedule conflict. I just dont know if I should.
female, 18 yrs.
USA
If your uncomfortable with the idea of having sex with him after only knowing him for a short while...don't.
Get to know him. Decide whether you really like him or not. Then, if you feel comfortable...
I would like to add that the longer the both of you can wait, the better. It has been my experience that, if you rush into a physical relationship with someone, your indescretion comes back to bite you in the rear sooner or later. Seriously.
Hope things work out for you ;)
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I've just had a few knocks lately with everything and i've lost my confidence and i've got low self esteem how do it get my confidence and steem back. Many thanxz
Building your confidence and self-esteem requires a lot of effort. First, you have be willing to put forth that effort...
Second, you need to realize that a lack of confidence is born out of unrealistic expectations. Unrealistic expectations of yourself, brought directly to you by...well you.
I don't mean to sound critical. The fact of the matter is that everyone is their own worst critic. We all have unrealistic expectations of ourselves, we want to be perfect. The problem is...none of us are! So start appreciating yourself, not for who you would like to be, but for who you all ready are :) You need to look in the mirror and tell yourself that you were created beautiful, and equal to everyone else. You are a spectacular creation! You are wonderful, and I MEAN IT!! :P
And if life in general is getting you down, try to remember what a fantastic gift life really is. And if you are waiting for circumstances to be perfect, so that you can be happy...Stop waiting. Happiness is not a product of the perfect circumstances, happiness if the unfailing joy that you hold in your heart despite the most imperfect of circumstances. Stop waiting to gain your confidence, and stop waiting to be happy. Choose to be confident, and choose to be happy...Right now.
Best wishes ;)
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hey im 23 i live in this campsite with a bunch of my family ((dont ask, long story)) and i had a boyfriend who i'd been with since i was 18. we were going to get married and he proposed to me, and it was after we made up because my brother and our friends had helped us to make up because we were fighting for various reasons. well, he proposed to me and then the next day i went somewhere with my 2 girlfriends and i ran into this kid who i went out with for a pretty long time in highschool. we got to talking and he didnt know i had a boyfriend. well the same night i was sitting talking with everyone and my cellphone rang and it was him. he told me he found out i had a boyfriend and he hung up on me and sounded really upset. so i went out to talk to him with my 2 girlfriends and we didnt come back until about 3 in the morning. well my fiance stayed up waiting for me and when i came in he asked why i wasnt home earlier and accused me of cheating on him ((one of the fights we previously had was because he was cheating on me)) and well i got mad and he never came to bed that night ((we share a gigantic camper with about 8 people)) and i woke up the next morning and found a note that said he was out just like i had been and would be back later. so he came back then the next morning and he was drunk so i threw the ring at him and i pretty much kicked him out. well i went back to him after having a boyfriend and told him i still loved him and he told me he didnt want me to find out this way but he had a girlfriend. so now i like him and i dont know what to do because deep down i think he really does like me. he ran his car into a tree when we broke up the one time and idk hes just really comfusing.
Okay, let me get this straight...
Are you telling me that you had to kick out your fiance because he didn't trust you, even though he was the one who cheated on you? And this guy, that you dated previously got upset because you had a boyfriend, only for you to find out later that he had a girlfriend?
Wow, that is just...really messed up my dear. I think you need to kick them both to the curb, head for the hills, and don't look back. Neither of them are worthy of you, please find someone who is!
BTW, in case I misunderstood, and you would like to address the issue, please leave something in my feedback or inbox. Best of luck to ya' girlie :)
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Haha! I didn't understand! Sorry ;)
Anyway, yeah...I'm sticking to what I said, about your former fiancee at least. I only retract my comment about the other guy.
(Thanks for clearing that up. Gracias...)
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Is the feeling of expecting someone to be monogamous (having only one love interest) a girl thing or do guys feel that way too sometimes? And is their anyway to get over that feeling, cuz I hate expecting certain people to be devoted to only one person (namely me if they tell me that they love me when we aren't together). Am I justified in feeling that way?
You are talking about "exclusive dating." That means, only dating one person at a time...
I have known some boys to date more than one girl at one time. But, I have also known just as many that only prefer to date one girl at a time. So, no...Exclusive dating is not just a "girl thing."
I'm guessing you are in your teens. If so, certain people might suggest that you date more than one person. Or they might suggest that it is okay for other people to date more than one person. This belief is okay, as long as everyone remains honest and clear about their feelings. However, if you are uncomfortable with this idea, instead of just trying to overcome it, maybe you should investigate the cause of it a little more.
You should decide for yourself, whether you like this idea or not. If you don't, then just date one person at a time.
As for you expecting certain people to be exclusive to you...You really shouldn't expect that person to be exclusive to you unless you've both talked about it and decided that you're ready for a deeper relationship. However...
It looks like this person, whoever they are, has told you that they love you, while they are dating someone else. This obviously hurts you. And you are justified to feel this way, feeling hurt in such a circumstance is very VALID. If I were you, I would feel the same way. (In fact, I have been in that situation and did feel the same way. And I'm in my twenties honey ;)
I would suggest talking to this person. Don't accuse, don't blame, but do explain how you are feeling. This person will understand and seek to compromise with you to reach a solution if they really care about you. If not, then maybe you should reconsider how YOU feel about them...
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for some odd reason.. i start to cry when i see people helping me, answering me questions. i dont even cry in the saddest movies.. or if a friend does something that hurts me. maybe its because seeing people who care who i dont even know are helping me more than any of my friends or anyone i know would. any more thoughts?
It's okay :) Maybe your just touched, or shocked, that there really are kind people in the world who are willing to listen and understand. There is nothing wrong with that :D
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Im 13 and I am a female. I have the guy that I like and he likes me. One problem is that he lives in Florida and I live in Alabama. The second problem is he is 17 and my mom says that he is to old for me. I really like him and I am willing to do anything. Should I follow my heart or do what my mom says is right and just forget about him???
I would like to point out that, age difference aside, it would be very difficult to have a relationship with this boy because of the distance between you. The fact of the matter is, you live in Alabama and he lives in Florida. Neither of you are in a position to move, and it would be difficult to see him anyway. You can't drive, he can, but it would take him days to even get to Alabama. And plane tickets are just too expensive, if you want to see each other on a regular basis.
Bottom line: long distance relationships are difficult. Even more so if the two of you are under eighteen.
If you want to date, I suggest you try dating someone who shares your zip code.
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There's a 'rock event' (like a disco but with rock music) that goes on in my town every month or so, and most of my mates go to it. Out of the seven of us, five go (I don't). This place has a really bad rep. and most people who go there drink, smoke and do drugs, but of course my friends parents have NO IDEA about this. All of my five friends who go have gotten into smoking, and two of them are serious binge drinkers. One guy I know but am not great friends with also goes to this place and has gotten into illegal drugs, as has one girl I was kinda 'hi in the hallway' friends with, and she got expelled and charged by the police for it. Now my problem is, I will NOT stand by and watch my friends slowly kill themselves with a load of alcohol, drugs and cigarettes, but how can I stop them? I can't say anything about how dangerous it is because that's like preaching and they know the dangers but don't care. I am thinking of breaking friends with them...three of them are moving into my house in a couple of months and I have told the two of them moving in with me that smoke and drink that they can forget moving in if they think they can smoke in my house and they just laughed. I don't want to preach and I know if they don't want to stop I can't make them...but what do you think I should do? I am NOT standing by and watching them die. There's also the added problem that I am extremely asthmatic and being in a house with smokers would (I've checked this with a doctor) kill me within a month, but my friends won't listen to this either. I love them all loads but I am not putting up with this any more and I am not putting my life on the line because they are too selfish to stop smoking. CAN I make them see sense? Or should I just break friends and move on?
Thanks!!
Been there, done that. Your friends have problems...Unfortunately, there isn't much that you can do to help them, besides maybe talking to them. And really, most of the time that doesn't seem to work.
Your friends will quit when they want to quit. They won't stop on behalf of anyone else. And they won't even listen until their darn well ready too.
Until they are ready to listen, you need to think about YOU. Their habits are not only hazardous to your health, but their influence is hazardous as well. I suggest you call off the move, tell them you aren't hanging around them until they can get their crap together, and make some new friends. Friends that don't have problems with addiction, friends that resepect your needs, and friends that will be smart enough to listen to you.
I know that's harsh, but I think the alternative is even harder. The longer you keep these people as company the more they are going to drag you down. The more unhappy you are going to be. Don't let them do that to you. Please.
I hope that all goes well. Best wishes ;)
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I am 13 and in the 8th grade. I am homeschooled and want to go back to school. I have been homeschooled since I was in the 6th grade (just in time to start Jr.High). I miss getting to hang out with all my friends from 5th grade. Yes, I've made friends through homeschool but it just not the same. I don't live a normal life. I mean I never have homework, i don't have to get up as early as my friends, If I want to I can extra school work and move up a grade, I'm even doing 9th grade History. My mom wants me to stay homeschooled, she has even tried to bribe me with a trip to Jersulem (which I really want to go there), but only if stay homeschooled all the way through school. I really want to go back to school, but I also want to stay homeschooled. What should I do????
Hello my dear.
I was homeschooled through half of junior high and half of high school, so I understand how you must be feeling. You are not alone :) While homeschooling does have advantages, it has a lot of disadvantages too.
When I told my parents that I wanted to quit homeschool, initially they weren't very receptive to the idea either. I think that your mother might think that you'll do better academically if you stick to homeschooling. She also might be afraid that if you return to public school, you might get mixed up with the wrong crowd. It's surprisingly easy nowadays.
However, she needs to understand that at 13, being normal is a high priority. (I'm guessing this is what you may be feeling.) You want to be surrounded by your peers. Adults might think that being normal and peers are very silly indeed. But it's not. It's actually a big part of your social and psychological development.
You and your mom need to sit down a discuss the situation in depth. You need to ask her why exactly she wants you to stay homeschooled, and you need to make it clear how you feel and how important to you it is. The two of you need to investigate other options, like for example private schools. There also homeschooling programs that you can get into, that will not only prepare you for college, but where you would adhere to a more "normal" lifestyle. While your classes would be smaller, you would adhere to a schedule and be among more people your own age. There are a lot of options.
I would like to add that whatever you two decide, you should make it by before the end of the school year. If you decide to go to a public school, you need to get in before the onset of high school. Mainly because, if you don't and later decide to go back to school, getting into high school after your freshman years all ready started could be difficult.
You and your mother need to understand each other and come to some sort of compromise if possible. And if what you really want is to quit homeschool, you need to be persistant. Don't let her dangle that trip over your head if this is what you really want. Your emotional needs are important, and she needs to recognize that. Hopefully, you can come to some new agreement. Maybe she could take to you Jerusalem if you make good grades, or do well on your SAT's.
I hope I was able to provide you with some help. Please visit my inbox or feedback if you have any further questions. Good luck to you ;)
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it feels like all of my friends are getting new friends and that im "out of the loop" like me and this 1 girl used to be really close and now she has new friends i mean we still hang out but not like we used to. this is making me reLLY DEPRESSED what should i do???
-unloved child
No, no, no...You are not unloved :)
You are growing up, and changing. So are your friends. During this stage of your life it's normal for you and your friends to develop different interests and personalities, and as a result grow apart.
I understand that this can make you sad. (I still remember being sad when I realized that my childhood friend and I were growing apart.) Being sad is also natural, but I promise that it will pass.
If you and your current friends still share similiar interests, try to strengthen that friendship by rediscovering your common interests and spending a little more time together. If not, try making new friends. (Or you could try both.)
Making new friends isn't really that hard, contrary to popular belief. You could try joing a club at school, getting involved in sports, or find some activity outside of school that you are interested in. Or you could even try just walking up to another boy/girl at school who looks friendly and striking up a conversation. (I've made some of my best and oldest friends that way.)
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im 5'2 and 115 lbs. everyone tells me im not fat or chubby. they say that my stoamch is flat but its not. no matter what i think that im heavy and that its noticable. are there any ways to make my stomach flat? and situps never worked for me. i want to lose it because im always afraid that im going to lose my boyfriend to someone whos skiny and pretty. any ideas? please and thank you.
You really are not fat. Yes, I know...I can't see you. But I can prove it.
It is called your "Ideal Body Weight." To calculate your ideal body weight you multiply 2.3 times the amount of inches you are over five feet. (This is for women only.) For example: if you are five feet and two inches tall, it would look like this: 2.3 x 2. Then you add 45.5 kg. You now have your ideal weight. To convert kilograms to pounds simply multiply your kilograms by 2.2.
I did the calculations myself and I got 110 lbs. In case you are gasping because you are five pounds over your ideal body weight, you are still not fat (your actually quite slim). Overweight, or obese is defined as 20% over ideal body weight. Which means that you would have to be over 132 lbs. to be considered overweight.
You shouldn't be concerned about being overweight. If you want to be concerned about being healthy...Fine. Drink lots of water, eat three healthy meals a day, and exercise for at least twenty minutes every day.
BTW, if you're thinking that your boyfriend is going to leave you for one of those girls that look like stick figures, forget it. It probably doesn't bother him, just you. I've actually had several members of the opposite sex tell me that they don't like stick-girls. They like women with curves, because it looks more feminine and sexually appealing. Think of it this way, if a guy wanted to date someone effeminite looking, he could just date another guy.
You need to look in the mirror and tell yourself that you are beautiful, and BELIEVE it. Otherwise you are not going to believe him when he tells you that you are beautiful. And if you don't believe him, you'll end up pushing him away. Push him away long enough, and your worse fear just might come true. Only he won't be leaving you for someone skinnier, he'll be leaving you for someone with more confidence.
To keep him you don't need to loose weight, you need to gain confidence.
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I dont know if this is the right cateorgory but w/e. Ok well let me put it this way my classmates most of them are jerks. Well see the thin is i am smart like really smart and my classmates make fun of me for it because i get all 100% on my tests and quizzes. and they also hate the fact that when we have a huge test and we have to write stuff down i dont take notes because i rember it all and then i get higher grades then the people that wrote it all down. so i guess what i am asking is how can i get my class to stop annoying and makin fun of me because i am so smart.
You're smart, their jealous. And their behavior is less than intelligent.
However, don't let their bad behavior become an excuse to sink to their level. Acting like a jerk isn't necessary.
Changing isn't necessary either. If you are able to remember the material without taking notes, don't start taking them now just to make everyone else feel better about themselves. However, try to keep your test scores confidential whenever possible. Broadcasting that you aced the last test will sound like you're just rubbing it in.
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My parents are in a very strict religon.
I dont want to be in this religon and I've told them so, and I don't go to their church.
But everytime I do something against the church rules, (even though I dont go)
they still go, "Your going to hell" "Your a sinner" bla and so forth.
I dont like this and it hurts my feelings. They even say I'm full of the devil and qoute scriptures at me. What do I do? its totally getting on my nerves and just because I dont go to their church doesnt mean I'm a rebellious brat like they think I am.
HELP!
I sort of...know how you feel. Though my parents have never gone as far as to tell me that I am "full of the devil."
Anyway, you need to explain to your parents how much this hurts your feelings.
I would like to say that their behavior seems...abnormal to me. I have known some pretty devout Christians, but this just seems...too radical. Almost like some sort of cult...Which is why I am expressing my deepest concern.
If you talk to your parents, and their behavior towards you does not change, please seek help elsehwere. Go to a teacher, counselor, or prefferably...a family member that you can trust.
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There is this woman at work who really is being rude to me.
The managers all like her, and I tried telling one of them that she was really being rude, and they all jumped on me.
what do I do? Should I just ignore her? obviously I can't go to any of the managers because of the extreme favoritism. help!
Keep a low profile. Try to be nice to her, and if she continues to be rude to you...ignore it.
Meanwhile, look for a new job.
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My ex-boyfriend and I both told each other we loved each other. He doesn't want to get back together because he has issues that doesn't seem to go away. It's along the same reasons we broke up. Should I wait until he gets over them or just get over him? I really love him, and he seems to care about me.
I am going to say something, and you might not want to hear it. I apologize in advance.
Once upon a time I was in a very similiar situation. My ex-boyfriend had "issues" too. We started dating, broke up, dated again and became serious, broke up again, got back together, broke up again, got back together, and then...broke up...again. Why did we keep getting back together? Because he said he had worked out his issues. Why did we keep breaking up? Because the same old issue popped up once more, or he found a new one to replace it entirely.
The last time he begged me to come back to him, I remember thinking...I remember thinking that maybe the problem wasn't his issues. Maybe the problem was that he couldn't decided whether or not he wanted the relationship that I wanted.
I believe this could be true for you too. Why? Because if he really loves you, and wants to be with you, and you really love him, and want to be with him, why aren't the two of you together now? He wouldn't let his issues stand in the way of something that he really wanted.
My advice is: move on my dear.Find someone worthy of you. Find someone who won't let their issues get in the way of what they want. YOU!
Warning: you'll feel awful at first, but after a while, you'll feel a lot better than you ever did when you were dating your now ex-boyfriend.
But, that is my opinion. Take it or leave it. The choice is yours. Either way I hope you find what you are looking for, and I wish you the best of luck ;)
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