Go to a doctor; as far as I know, none of us are physicians.
Are these recent symptoms, or ongoing? If they're ongoing, it could be something like diabetes.
The cold hands and feet could be bad circulation. The dehydration could be a virus like mono or something similar - you need bloodwork done to find that out though.
Blurred vision can be a side effect of exhaustion, it happens to me sometimes and I have 20/20 vision.
The sleep thing and having difficulty gaining weight can both be part of depression.
The sleep thing made me think of hypersomnia, actually, where you're always tired no matter how much you sleep. One of my friends had that issue for awhile.
Welcome to the ranks of undereducated geniuses. My IQ was 150 last they checked, and it's no easy task being intelligent in a school where they curb their curricula to fit people with IQs of 100 or lower.
But like I said before, GO to the doctor. We can't diagnose you legally or logically. Tell them your symptoms, let them order blood tests and all that.
Good luck.
-Siren =)

There is no way to target or pick and choose what gets bigger and what doesn't. It all depends on your genetics and your body type.
Example - I have a friend whose junk food goes straight to her stomach and enlarges that. When I eat junk food, my stomach stays pretty much the same, but my arms get thicker.
Certain people have fat go straight to their hips, others have it go to their stomach, etc.
There are exercises you can do to shrink your butt, or maybe make the muscles bigger depending on what you do and if you do it right, but food alone doesn't do a damn thing.
If it did, no one would have trouble dieting because we'd all know that the right foods are guaranteed to do the right thing.
To get a good shape, you need to exercise, eat things that are good for your body, and if all else fails, cosmetic surgery...but that should be a last resort. =P
Good luck!
-Siren =)

Yeah. It's called The Healthy Lifestyle Diet.
As in, eat healthy food, drink healthy drinks, sleep enough, eat enough and at the right intervals, and you lose weight.
Start working out, even if it's just a walk down your street every other day, start eating more things that are good for you, and pledge yourself to eating healthy foods that are low in calories, low in fat, high in protein, and low in carbs.
I'll tell you right now, though, that all these fad diets are ridiculous.
If you only drink ANYTHING for 10 days you'll lose weight. The moment you eat something you'll gain it back. If you cut anything out of your diet and use it to lose weight, you'll gain when you add it back on. These fad diets don't work because they're short term.
A healthy diet works because it's long term. It takes awhile to lose weight and keep it off. If you're looking for a quick fix, by all means try one of the fads. South Beach is good, takes willpower, and you'll gain it back if you ever eat carbs again, but hey...it's fast, which is what people are all about these days - instant gratification.
Anyway.
If you want more details on how to lose weight effectively, drop one in my inbox, and make sure to include your age and gender.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

Wash your face with something unscented, and get Benadryl. It's an antihistamine, and a great thing to have around the house if you have any sort of allergies, or allergic reactions. You can find it over the counter at any pharmacy.
Also, obviously, never use Nair on your face again.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

Wow, that sounds like a mess. How old are you all?
My SN is SirenCytherera, I'm usually very good with all this, but I need more info from you.
Do you know this girl?
IM me, let's see what we can do about this situation...
-Siren =)

Most people trying to LOSE weight eat about 1500 calories a day.
If you're trying to gain, you HAVE to increase your calorie intake, especially if you have a fast metabolism. I have a fast metabolism too, I eat every 3 hours, and about 1500 calories, but I'm trying to lose weight, and it's working. I got to the point where I wasn't eating enough to maintain my weight, and I dropped pounds like flies. (...weird analogy, but whatever, you get the idea.)
You don't have to eat unhealthily, it's good that you like things that are good for you.
You could also eat less frequently, but if you're actually hungry every 3 hours, don't worry about that. You'd do more harm than good to deny your body what it wants or needs.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

All romance languages are interrelated in some ways. Latin is kind of the base language, but it doesn't really help with other languages.
I took 7 years of French (well, 8 now), and I love it - it sounds beautiful and it was easy for me.
Spanish, though, is a pretty useful language, since there are a lot of people in the US who speak it. It's good for getting jobs, too.
So overall, I'd recommend Spanish as the most useful.
I'd still pick French though. =D
Good luck!
-Siren =)

Well, that depends. If it's your first time and your hymen is still intact, chances are it's gonna hurt. It made me cry the first two times it hurt so bad. The third time is when it stopped for me. But everyone's different. What do you do? You try to relax.
Well, a guy's penis can only really go in two places down there, and you'd definitely know if it went in your butt.
It hurts so much because - not to get too graphic here, but - your guy's basically ripping a hole in a thin skin inside your vagina called your hymen. It hurts when you get a papercut, right? Your hymen is skin like any other, with blood vessels, and nerve endings. If you cut it, chances are it will bleed and hurt just like the rest of your body.
Some people are lucky and don't have those, and others still have their hymens broken via things other than sex, like tampons, horseback riding, any vigorous sports, or even masturbation.
People's bodies are very resilient. It's hard to break something having sex. (I mean, you can pull a muscle if you're really rough, but that's unlikely.) Well, except your hymen, but that's supposed to happen. If you broke something, you'd know the same way you broke an arm or a leg, 'cause seriously, unless he's like, trying to break one of your libs, or like, a rib or something, no part of you is gonna be seriously injured.
It's also normal to bleed a little (or a lot) the first time (or first few times) you have sex.
If it's NOT your first time and it hurts like hell, something could be wrong, and you should stop, then go see your gyno asap.
Otherwise, a little (or a lot of) pain is normal for your first few times. Once you get that initial pain over with, sex is great - but always practice safe sex. Even if you're on birth control, make your guy wear a condom. If you're not on BC, get on it before you have sex. It helps with PMS, too. =)
Good luck!
-Siren =)

Well, it all comes down to who you think would give you more of what you want. If you want like, a committed, long relationship, you might wanna go with Sal, if you can handle the long distance thing.
If you want someone close who you can talk to and see every day - if you're a physical person (not necessarily sex, but hugs and kisses too), then you should go with Tony.
BUT I have to warn you, I've never had a good experience with a long distance relationship. This is just from personal experience, but that's all I can work from. I was with a guy for almost two years - he went to Florida for college and I stayed in Michigan. He had trouble keeping contact because he was so busy, and the connection between us died because I wanted more - I was used to him living down the road, and all of a sudden he was states away. It's probably harder when you're used to the long distance thing, but there's a reason a lot of people don't do it, it's not easy.
I know a couple, one of them is in MI and one's in Chicago. They've been together for five years or something - six? and they're even having trouble with it.
But if you're more attracted to Sal than to Tony, go for the long distance thing. Go for the guy you're really drawn to. If you're just attracted to Tony 'cause he's literally "right there," then you should probably rethink some stuff.
I hope this helps, feel free to contact me again if you want more help.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

First, if you're 5'5" and not 5'15" (feet and inches?) you don't really need to lose weight at 123. You're having trouble losing weight because you're pretty much at your ideal weight. When you get there, your body's resistant to lose any more because it's really not healthy. Society has girls thinking they need to be technically underweight, but it's just not true. Anyway.
Lemme explain something to you - these "diets" that people go on are quick fixes, not permanent. If you cut carbs out like South Beach or Atkins, your body gets used to not having that, and then if you ever add it back in, you'll just gain the weight right back. To lose weight and keep it off, change your lifestyle. If you have an hour to spare, you can work out anytime day or night at HOME, using your own bodyweight as resistance. Or hey, you can even take a walk with a friend. It's cardio, and it's fun.
Contrary to popular belief, you have to eat to lose weight. If you don't eat enough, or often enough, you'll either gain or just not lose anything.
As far as food, you wanna center your diet around protein. Meat, dairy, nuts, etc. Veggies are good. Fruits are good. You wanna stay away from sucrose and high fructose corn syrup. Fruits have fructose in them, but that's good sugar. They're simple carbs and easy for your body to burn. Complex carbs like breads are harder, so if you're not very active, you wanna cut those back - not OUT, just cut them back. You also wanna try to eat every 3-4 hours to up your metabolism. So like, example:
Breakfast at 10am: 1 egg sunny side up with 1 piece of wheat toast, and a banana.
Snack at 1: 1 apple
Lunch at 4: Sandwich with some kind of fat free cheese and some low fat lunchmeat (make sure you use one serving of everything) carrot sticks or some other kind of veggie, and maybe some other kind of fruit
Snack at 7: 1 hard boiled egg
Dinner at 10: Meat main course, a salad with some kind of light/fat free vinaigrette dressing, and some fruit.

See how it adds up to five small meal a day instead of 3? Notice how everything is pretty much balanced? You can make your own diet as long as you keep small portions and balance everything. You don't have to have carbs with every meal, but balance is key.
Drink lots of water, fat free milk, and juice, and lay off the sodas (yes, even diet).
The example I gave is not a diet plan, it's just an example. You can build your new food-lifestyle around the balance ideas I gave you, and create a diet that tastes good, and makes you feel good.
If you want more help, drop one in my inbox.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

Actually, that's quite normal. A lot of women have trouble getting off from intercourse alone. The vast majority need external stimulation in order to experience orgasm. That's why they made things like vibrating cock rings...lol.
It could also be that the guy's not quite giving you what you need/want, but in that case you've gotta figure out what you DO need, and help him figure out how to give it to you.
Do some research on line - find some positions that allow him to do some work with his hands, if y'know what I mean.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

No, it is not abnormal. Your hymen can be broken via things other than intercourse - if this has happened, then it's normal that sex wouldn't hurt.
Yes, it does hurt like none other when your hymen is broken. It's also possible that you just don't have one.
There are a lot of reasons that would explain sex not hurting, but by no means does it mean you're abnormal.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

There's a difference between hurting muscles and injured muscles. If you haven't worked out in awhile, or you don't regularly work out, your muscles are gonna hurt. It's a good thing, it means you're working your muscles. The trick is to give them time to rest.
But, you HAVE to stretch after you work out. Look up a bunch of stretches on line - stretch your calves, your hamstrings, your quads, your glutes, your arms, your back, your abs, your neck, and anything you can find, but be gentle with your body. Do what feels good, listen to your muscles.
If you can't bend your legs, or you pulled a muscle, hot water and Epsom salt. If there's swelling, ice it on and off for fifteen minutes at a time.
If you're hurting, lighten up a little. Take a day or two off.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

Ah, the first time issues...I had problems too, it hurt me continuously for like, the first three or four times.
Lubrication is VERY important. If you're not wet enough, then he's not going in anywhere...lol.
Make sure you get enough foreplay.
Also, I don't want to lecture or preach, or anything, but really - if you're not comfortable enough with this guy to get completely undressed around him, then you should probably wait 'til you are to have sex with him.
Granted, I'm not sure if you're still that uncomfortable, or if it was just that first time, but you get the idea, I'm sure.
He needs to do whatever he can to relax you, and turn you into girl-putty if you're too tense. Tension causes MAJOR problems, and it can hurt him, too. (But don't WORRY about it, or you'll wind up even more tense! =P)
Anyway, you have every right to be a little scared, it does hurt, and that's totally normal, if your hymen isn't broken. So you're not weird, or abnormal. You're probably just nervous.
Good luck honey!
-Siren =)

P.S. To the columnist who posted first on this question, I'm not one to encourage bickering between advicenators, or between the people who ask questions on this site and the people who answer them, but shut the FUCK up. This is a site for advice. If you don't want to answer a question, don't. If you think a question is unnecessary, ignore it. If people can ask what song they should play for their boyfriend on their one-month "anniversary," then a girl can ask why she's having so much trouble getting a first time with her boyfriend.

Toning's not everything. It's great that you found a workout to tone your stomach and get rid of cellulite, but to shrink your stomach you've gotta eat right, too.
Mostly protein, fruit, veggies, not too many complex carbs, lay off the sucrose...find a calculator on line to figure out how many calories you should be eating to lose weight.
If you're already eating well and all that, you might wanna try some cardio.
If you have the lower ab pooch kinda thing that a lot of girls have, you might wanna try doing more lower ab stuff. Try working out your lower back, too. There are a lot of solutions here, you're not stuck.
If you want/need more specific help, lemme know.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

You have to understand that any amount of working out, including running, is going to have you gaining muscle.
BUT know this - muscle mass weighs more than fat. Weight is just a number. My boyfriend can wrap his hands around my waist and pick me up, but I weigh about 120. It's lean muscle mass, I work out a lot.
LEAN muscle mass is more compact than fat, even if it does weigh more.
I think the muscles you don't want are the big and bulky scary muscles that guys get when they work out. Testosterone causes that. So, really, you have nothing to worry about.
Running will help you burn fat and gain lean muscle, and keep your heart in shape. That's a GOOD thing.
Don't measure your weight by the number on the scale. Measure it by the size of your clothes. You say your stomach is getting flatter; that's really good. It's working. =D
It is possible to lose weight, though. But if you're close to or at your ideal weight, you'll find it kinda hard.
To lose weight, you have to eat right, and the right AMOUNT. Eat something small every 3-4 hours, and that should help increase your metabolism.
You might want to find a calculator on line to see how many calories you burn per day and how much you need to be eating to lose weight. You'd be surprised, it's probably more than you think.
If you have any specific questions or want more help, feel free to contact me.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

That is NOT a healthy diet.
A healthy "diet" is a life change, something you can stick to for years/the rest of your life.
Healthy means eating the right stuff, the right amount, at the right intervals (example - to promote a healthy metabolic rate, you're supposed to eat small meals every 3-4 hours.)
"Diets" are bad, in general. As soon as you're off your "diet" all that weight's gonna come back.
I have a fast metabolism, I came down with a cough and had no appetite for a couple days. I also drank a TON of water and tea, trying to get my voice back, and I lost six pounds in two days. As soon as I got my appetite back, I gained five back.
I think I know about the diet you described up there. I tried it. It works, but if you stop you'll gain it back. My advice to you is to get your family (and yourself) to stop immediately, and instead seek a nutritionist's advice. They can create personalized diets that will work for you and your family. Or, just do a little research on line and figure out for yourselves what a healthy lifestyle would be.
You can find a calculator on line to see how many calories you and your family should be eating to lose weight. You can all start an exercise regimen - even something as little as taking a walk every day or every other day.
While these fad diets might work quickly, speed isn't always the answer. If you want the weight loss to be permanent, change something permanently.
If you want more specific nutrition advice, feel free to drop one in my inbox.
Good luck!
-Siren =)

Halls vapor action cough drops. They work.
Room temperature water - NEVER ice cold (if you try it, your vocal chords tend to try to seize up; you kinda shock them), hot is okay, but try to go room temp - with either lemon or honey in it. Lemon works for some people, honey for others.
Peppermint tea is good, too, with a Ricola cough drop melted in it. Or you can do a combo and put a teaspoon of honey in peppermint tea with a cough drop melted in, or lemon and honey, or...you get the drift. Anyway, the peppermint DECAF tea with a cough drop in it is what I did every morning before my competitions, worked like a charm.
Drink LOTS of water.
Don't drink caffeine, stay away from dairy that day, and try to stay away from sugar. (Sugar free cough drops are good)

I was a vocal performance major for two years, if you have technical questions, feel free to drop one in my inbox.
-Siren =)

The first thing you need to do is say it out loud. The first step to fixing any problem is to admit that there is one.
You do need to tell one of your parents, though. I know you don't feel like it's a bad thing, but it's horribly unhealthy, and very damaging to your body. Did you know people get to the point where they can't eat without throwing up?
I battled with anorexia for awhile, and after almost a year I realized I was starving myself on purpose, and that it could be defined as an eating disorder. Only problem was, when I started trying to eat, food made me feel sick. I went home for spring semester and the first thing I told my mom was "Mom, I need your help. I have a problem, and I can't fix it myself. I need you to make me eat something little every three hours, even if I don't want to." She didn't ask for details, and I didn't give them to her. It was hard at first, and it took a TON of willpower, but I fixed the problem, and I've never felt better.
With something like this, you need your family to support you. Especially if it's something that's been part of you for so long, it's gonna take a lot of power, and a lot of love, to change it.
You don't have to go to rehab, or to therapy, if you can control and fix it yourself. Understand, though, that if it's out of your control, if you can't stop yourself from throwing up what you eat, if your body can't handle it, you're going to have to get medical help.
But for now, your first step needs to be to talk to your parents, or even just your mom or dad, whoever you feel more comfortable talking to, and tell them what's going on. They can't help you if they don't know.
Good luck.
-Siren =)

Before I read your question, I read the title, and my brain immediately went "NO!"
Then I read your question.
In a relationship, to make it work, you HAVE to talk things out, or fight things out, however you do. Things need to be out in the open, feelings need to be expressed, and your guy actually understands that. Most guys have your frame of mind, that they don't want to talk.
You have to remember above everything, that guys CANNOT read minds, and neither can you. You're in a relationship with this guy. How much do you care about him? Do you trust him? If so, you should be willing to open up about what you're feeling, if he is.
I'm not telling you to change who you are. You don't have to tell him every thought that runs through your head, but if he wants to talk things out, then you absolutely need to.
I've had unpleasant conversations, but you know what - the guy I've had them with the most has been with me through thick and thin, he's my best friend, and I love him. But we could never have come this far had we not TALKED to each other about difficult things.
It all depends, really, on how much you care about this guy.
It's up to you. I highly suggest you find a way to open up. If you shut him out too long, you're probably gonna lose him...just speaking from experience.
Good luck
-Siren =)

I'm a laid-back 26 year old with a Psychology BA, starting my MA program, and working my way into the field as quickly as I can. It took me an extra Bachelor's degree (in vocal performance and creative writing) to figure it out, but I was put on this Earth to help, to heal, and to love.

I have made the decision to dedicate my life and career to helping others. I am here to do just that.

I've been a member since 2004, and since I signed up, I've gone through quite a lot and learned quite a lot from it. I'm here to give guidance where I had none; no one should have to go through the difficulties I went through alone.

Feel free to visit my website/blog, if you want to read my experience with domestic violence and my thoughts on it.

***While I do tend to answer mental health and other health-related or medicine-related questions, I am by NO MEANS a licensed physician or practitioner of any sort. Any and all advice I give for these questions is from my own experience or studies.***

If you need to get a hold of me quickly, my screen name on AIM is SirenCytherea. Just let me know you found me here.

I'm a strong believer in the idea that there are no stupid questions except the ones left unasked, so, please, keep an open mind, heart, and mouth.

Siren

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