about

I'm Christina, and I'm 27. I tend to be brutally honest when I give advice or an opinion. I don't tell people what they want to hear but rather what they need to hear. They don't always appreciate it at first, but I usually get a thank you in the end.


I have 15 tattoos, and 8 piercings. I'm married and just gave birth to a baby boy in May. I'm currently a SAHM so you can find me taking care of my son and binge-watching television while he naps.

advice

so. yesterday my boyfriend (of 1 1/2 years) grandfather died yesterday in his sleep. he never woke up.

so he asked me to come along to the wakes this weekend. (yes, i have met his grandfather multiple times, he was a wonderful man!) of course ill go if he wants me to, but its not in my best interest to...you know?

well, any suggestions with what i should say to his family members that i have not met yet? this is a very sad time for his family. i feel like they wouldnt want me there, i dont know. ryan asked me to come. im going to have him ask his father first. i don't want his family to be angry that im there...like invading their privacy.

and, i heard the first wake of the day is for family and the second wake of the day is more for friends...

i just need help! i haven't been to a wake in forever.

I completely understand where you are coming from. My boyfriend's father passed away a couple of years ago, and I never got to meet him. (He was already dead when we started dating). Whenever they go to visit his grave, I feel awkward going because I never got to meet him and don't feel that it's my place. I always ask to make sure if it's okay that I go because I don't want to disrespect anybody.

You should probably ask your boyfriend's parents yourself. Chances are that if you ask him, he'll say that it's fine and he won't ask them. Just ask them if it's okay if you go because your boyfriend asked you to come and you want to make sure it's okay with them first before you give an answer. If they say yes, ask if there's anything else you can do. If there isn't, then just relax and do your best to show them your support.

Whatever family you do happen to meet at the wake, just tell them that you're very sorry for their loss and that he was a wonderful man who will truly be missed. Other than that, you're not really required to say much.

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I want to break up with my long distance relationship. There's no real reason..I honestly just don't feel like being in a relationship anymore. I live in the US, he in the Uk. I'm 19, he's 21. We've never met yet, been dating 8 months. He wants me to visit this summer.

I like him, but I don't love him. He LOVES me, he's actually obsessed. It freaks me out in a way. I tried breaking up with him earlier this week by using excuses about school, and he started crying for about 2 hours. So, I gave in. He told me he couldn't breathe, and that he'd come down here immediately and such. I don't WANT that, I'm scared if I break up with him that he'll show up at my door.

He's a very fragile guy, it took him 2 years to get over his ex, and he still talks about how he never thought he'd love again, blah blah, but then he found me. :/ I do like him, but I want to be free. I hate staying inside all day on the computer to talk to him, I want my life back. I know if I tell him this that he'll have some solution, like: you can go with your friends, or spend less time with me!

Basically, I don't want to be sucked in again. I want to break up with him, not lead him on with false hopes. Can you PLEASE tell me how to go about this? I've been struggling with it for about a month. I want to end it, cut all contact. But, what do I do when he starts crying? I'm not a heartless person, I don't know if I can just hang up on him. Ahh, please help!!!

This is a very difficult situation.

I think your reasoning is this: You want to be free. You're tired of not living your life and you're tired of always sitting around on the computer. You want to do things differently.

You really need to be straight forward with him. Just tell him that you cannot be in this relationship anymore. Tell him that it's nothing against him, but that you want to be single and live your life.

Make sure he knows that it's not your intention to hurt him, but that you're really not wanting to continue contact so that you can live life freely.

You just need to be honest, and assertive. If he starts to cry, you need to ask him to stop because he is making this more difficult than it needs to be. Just try your best to be honest, and then change your e-mail, sn, etc.

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Ive started my period like a week ago and its gones so i stopped putting on pads... when do i know when to wear them again? Please reply asap can u email me on pretty_pink4eva@hotmail.co.uk thankyou

Yes, when your period stops, you stop wearing pads. You can wear pantiliners if you'd like because there will be a little bit of discharge & that's normal.

You'll know when your period starts back up. You might get crampy, moody, etc. You'll know.

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some cultures say women are completely usless and should have litterally no rights that a man has. in my experience i call this totally wrong, and im pretty feminist for a guy. like on tv everyone important, or in the picture is men, men men men men men. it makes me sick. so what do u think??

I think women are just as important than men. We both contribute to society equally. A female can be president, they can be an athlete, they can be whatever they want, and males are not the ones who get to determine that.

We're just as strong, just as smart, just as courageous, and just as nice. Everyone has their weak points, but there is no better gender.

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I befriended a new girl at my school and have regretted it ever since. At first she was kind of shy and seemed nice, and I didn't listen to my friends who warned me that she would get annoying at one point or another. Now, its come to the point that I dread every second I have to be near her! I have gym with her, whenever I try to go talk to my other friends she literally grabs my arm and DRAGS me away! She'll wait for me outside my class in the middle of the hallway smiling, with everyone trying to go around her. She separates me from my other friends and literally CROSSES HER ARMS and SULKS if I so much as say two words to anyone else! She also has this superiority about her, like she thinks everyone WANTS to be her friend when the truth is that people are starting to jeer at me just for standing next to her. I don't want to be mean, but every moment I spend talking to her (ex- about her bloody tooth being pulled and how she couldn't spit or blood would come out) is TORCHURE! She goes up to me in the hallway and slaps me as I walk by or from behind (hard) just to say hi in her annoying, high pitched voice. I told her during gym one day I didn’t like the ‘touching’ thing. She started sulking and started RUNNING away from me, without saying another word! She’s only talking to me cause I'm the only one who hasn't shoved her away, and we have almost nothing in common. How do I get her to leave me alone w/o making her depressed?

Please, this has been going on for months and every day its getting worse! I don’t know what to do! Please, tell me what you think I should say to her or do to get her to leave me alone without completely hurting her, I’m the closest thing she has to a friend (which is pretty pathetic), and she CANNOT take a hint. I’m in 10th grade, please help!!!

Just say this:

"Look, I was nice in the beginning because you seemed like you were nice, but over the last 6 months, your behavior has proven that you are far from nice, and I really don't wanna be your friend. I don't mean to be mean and I hope you don't take it that way, but I just can't be your friend and I don't think it will happen in the future either. Sorry."

It's direct, clear, and nice. Hopefully she'll take the hint. You can't just expect her to know you don't like her, you have to tell her.

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Ok. So i'm joining the military soon and i need to lose 6 pounds to join. I have 5 weeks to do so. Sounds easy right? Well it's not. I've been on weight watchers for 2 weeks and i haven't dropped a single pound. I haven't cheated on this diet and it used to work for me before but now it's not. What am i doing wrong? I'm female, 5 feet 1 inch and 145 pounds. Please, I need good advice. My time is running out!

You need to exercise. You can't expect to drop some pounds just because you're eating healthy. The body does not work that way. You need to eat good AND exercise.

Start doing some sit-ups and go for a run.

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TAPS Ghost Hunters was just in my town yesterday and last night they ghost hunted this really old building in my town.

Does anyone know when the episode will be on tv?
And does anyone know where I go go look for future building they're gonna ghost hunt?

It won't be airing immediately. It'll probably be on within the next few months, and if not by July, probably before the end of 2010. There's no sure date for when it's going to air because they just filmed it, and it takes a lot of time to put an episode out because of all the editing and such that they need to do.

If you wanna know where they might go next, you can try their website but there's no guarantee on whether or not the information will be there.

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I was with my boyfriend yesterday and we were just hanging out. I got on his lap and we were making out a little and I got some gas. I was going to get up and go to the bathroom but it slipped out and I totally farted on my boyfriend! I turned red and apologized but it really did smell pretty bad and lingered in my room. He was SO grossed out and went home like 15 minutes later and didn't call me to say goodnight like he usually does. I'm SO embarrassed to even talk to him about this! He really didn't seem very pleased (not that I would expect him to be) but I don't know why he's taking it so hard and is upset...or maybe I'm just overreacting and misinterpretting the situation / his reaction? I don't know what to do now.

Just go on like it didn't happen. Farting is normal, and you can't help it. Everybody does it and if he's going to be that upset over something so stupid, he probably isn't the one.

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I really want to get my ears pierced but my mom said she doesn't know a place that will do it for a "fair" price. I think she's afraid to take me to some place that will charge a whole lot of money to just get an ear piercing done on me since I'm 14.

It seems like my friend said something about Wal-mart doing ear piercings a few years ago but I can't quite remember for sure. So, I wanted to know if anyone knows if Walmart will do ear piercings for me and how much it might cost to get my ears pierced at WalMart?

Oh, and if anybody does have experience with getting their ears pierced at Walmart . . . then does Walmart do a good job with ear piercing?

THANKS FOR ALL THE INFO!!!

Wal*Mart does indeed pierce ears, and I believe it is free, but you're paying for the earrings. Claire's also pierces ears for free, but the cost of the earrings comes into effect. Both places are good to go to if you'd like to get your ears pierced, but definitely take care of them because they can get infected very easily.

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I'm a teenager, and I'm trying to convincemy parents
to get me a cell phone! They never let ne even look at one! Anyone know what I should do???

Do you take part in any sports or go out a lot? If you do and have no way to get ahold of them, this might be a good argument to bring up when asking for a cell phone.

Also keep in mind that if you're whining and yelling and complaining about it, they're going to be less likely to buy it for you. If you're calm and mature while asking, they may hear you out.

You should always remember that a cell phone is a privilege, not a right so remember that if you go overboard, it can be taken away. You don't need a cell phone.

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Alright so.. I'm just gonna jump right into it I guess.
throughout highschool I was in a relationship with someone that caused me a lot of pain and stress. we dated for four years and then ended on really bad terms. at the time, I thought I loved him, but in retrospect I definately did not. But I stayed with him because inside I was terrified that if I ended things, no one else would ever want me.
But eventually we did break up and to my suprise, people did want me. Lots of people in fact. I've dated around since (we broke up last April so I guess for around 10 or 11 months now) and for the most part being single has treated me really good
so good in fact that I really, really haven't been seeking a relationship at all. I'm normally very straightforward with my partners, in fact most of them know from the day I meet them that I'm not interested in being somebodies girlfriend. Just the idea of it makes me feel.. honestly physically sick. I look back on my relationship and see how twisted and poisonus it was, and how much he manipulated and controlled me over the course of those four years. I was very cut off from my friends and loved ones and it made it so hard to get out. I didn't feel valuable and I was sad all the time.
This, on top of some abuses in my childhood that I won't delve too much into, has made me really wary about every putting myself in a similar situation. I've been treated so poorly by men throughout my life & I've really reached a point of feeling like I can't trust people.
Anyways, so that brings me to my current situation. Around two months ago I started texting this guy.. we have a lot of mutual friends, and his number was in my cellphone so I just kinda randomly decided to start chatting him up. I knew who he was and had always thought he was pretty attractive and whatnot but never really gave him any thought because he was out of my league, as far as I was concerned.
But we instantly hit it off and just had so much to talk about. I really liked him right from the second I 'met' him, if you could call it that. Anyways I won't detail the whole courtship because no one wants to read that, but basically we ended up meeting, and chilling, and hooking up. It all happened very quickly and came so easily. It really felt natural and at the time soo good.
Since then, we've been seeing eachother every couple days for about a month and a half. when I see him, I normally spend the night, then most of the following day with him. we have a lot of sex (often three times per visit) and he is by far the best lover I've ever had. Plus we connect really well intellectually and we make eachother laugh constantly and everything just.. flows. There is an obvious emotional attachment that has been building up, enough that we both comment about it. Anyways, lately he has been dropping hints like crazy that he wants to be my boyfriend, and I feel like.. I should want to. Because I do want him. I can picture a future with him and I like it. I enjoy every minute of my time with him and when he goes away I feel so depressed, despite knowing I'll see him again soon. I talk to him every day, every opportunity I get, and we're constantly seeking out eachothers company and trying to align our schedules.
But I feel angry, sick, and absolutely terrified every time he says anything about a relationship. I warned him from the day we met that I didn't want one and now here he is, pressing me to be with him, and I like everything about him and I don't have an excuse but.. I just wanna run in the opposite direction as fast as I possibly can. If it were anybody else, if he hadn't already developed into a close friend and if I thought I wouldn't be destroyed if I lost him, I would have already bolted.
But all I want is for things to stay the same. And I feel him pressing and I don't know if he's gonna wait for me. And I'm not sure if I should even make him wait because he has been so great in every way, and more than I deserve, and he's soo much more attractive than me (lol I know it's shallow that it's a factor, but honestly, I couldn't have imagined that a guy like him would ever look at me. He's just so beautiful and I'm completely addicted to every inch of him and it makes it soo much harder to differentiate affection from lust..), and who knows if I'll ever find anyone so compatible to me agian? I mean I really have been blessed to meet him, and I think that sincerely. He's perfect and I just wish I could make myself fit together with him but.. I don't know how.
When I think about a relationship I still get that sickening, dreadful weight in my stomach. And when he suggests it I just feel like somethings horribly wrong and he wants to manipulate and control me in just that same way. Even though from everything I've learned about him, he would never do that and doesn't even seem to have the capacity really. It wouldn't be in his nature. He's a better person than I am in every apparent way and yet.. I can't bring myself to trust him for even a second. It's so scary because.. if someone this perfect can't change my thinking, can anyone? Am I really gonna be alone forever?
I don't want to lose him but I also don't want to be with him. And I feel like at some point he is gonna offer an ultimatum. I don't know if I should just say.. fuck it, if he isn't willing to wait then he isn't worth it, or if I should reconsider? Because I mean seriously from his perspective, I wouldn't want to wait for someone with no promise of it ever changing either, who literally feels physically sick at the aspect of a relationship with me. It isn't fair to ask. He should have everything he wants but.. part of me feels like he expects too much or I'm too little or something along those lines. I just can't imagine the relationship being anything more than stress and pain and constant anxiety over losing him.
I'm so scared that something inside me is broken for good and that I'm never going to be able to offer someone more than casual sex.
I don't want to be that girl but.. I'm so sick of being alone and I can't force myself to be close to someone, and what else is there then? Physical intimacy is the only kind I can stand.. and it's better than none at all.
I just don't know what to do. I don't know if I should cut him loose and just forget all of this and continue as I was. If I should beg him to wait. Or if I should just jump.. Because I know he's a good person, who cares deeply about me and has no apparent intention of doing anything to hurt me. Because he's quickly becoming my best friend, and I don't want to use the word 'love' so early but.. I couldn't have imagined or fantasized a better partner if I tried. He really is among the best people I've ever met, and by far the best person that I've ever been sexually attracted to. I love his mind and his way of thinking and his strength and his sincerity and.. I just wish I were better somehow, and this came easier. But ever since it started getting serious it's been nothing but stress and late-night crying and watching shitty love movies, as far as I'm concerned. :P If a relationship is good, then why does the mere idea make me feel so very very bad? It's like someone puts a plastic bag over my head, and I just feel suffocated and blind and scared beyond explanation..
So uhh yea, what should I do? :P

You should definitely reconsider. I understand that your previous relationship was really shitty, and that it's made you wary, but this guy sounds awesome, and like he might be your perfect fit.

I really think that you should give him a chance. He really likes you, and you really like him. I don't see any reason not to stay and see where this goes. If he does end up hurting you, then I give you permission to be bitter, but for now, take the chance.

If you don't take this chance, you might always wonder what could've happened and you'll regret it for the rest of your life.

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I am fourteen, and my best friend has been really mean to me, she punches me in the stomach, pressure points me, squeezes my arm, and it's her way to take out her anger!! The other day she broke into my other best friends locker and tried to steal her gum! I don't want to rat her out, but I need to get her controlled!!

She rammed her violin into me because I didn't give her the answers to our math test! I told her she needs to figure it out, it's your test. Was i right about doing that? Should I remain friends with her? What do I tell her? How do I tell her? Please help me!!

You need to tell an adult, and then end your friendship with her. Her behavior is very violent, and if you keep letting her hurt you without saying anything, it's only going to get worse. Punches in the stomach will become kicks to the head, etc. Do not let her do that. Tell an adult (principal, teacher, counselor, anyone) and get this taken care of.

You did the right thing when it comes to the math test. If she doesn't know the answers, that is her fault for not paying attention. You are not her cheat sheet. If she wants good grades, she needs to pay attention and study just like everyone else.

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Hi,
A while ago, when I met this guy, I was pretty overweight. 200lb/5'5". My doctor told me I had a hormonal problem and he put me on BC which helped bring me down to 165 lbs.
I've been on a really strict diet and exercise plan but all it has done has maintained my weight. My doctor says to give it up because my family has a history of obesity (my mum is 225 lbs and my dad is 350 lbs) so it may be harder for me to lose more but I lost two pounds in the past month and that means I know I can do it but it'll probably take a bit longer than I hoped.
Anyway, I really like this guy, we're really good friends. I know he likes average girls. He has a picture of Jennifer Love Hewitt for his background when she was skinny but he's always dated like normal but still slender girls, I don't know an example might be something like this -> (http://img202.yfrog.com/i/69777407.jpg/)?
I really like him and know some people might think he's shallow because of weight but I don't really care because I understand about standards and all of that. He's actually really nice, he's very respectful towards women and he always shakes his head when I refer to my diet so I know he's concerned about me as a friend. I would really like him to be more than that I honestly think that because I was so overweight before, he never looked at me that way.
We've always flirted and teased each other but he never took it further? So could you please take a look at the generated image of me (it's pretty accurate except my hips are a bit bigger I think) and let me know if you think he could overlook my weight because of my personality? -> (http://img684.yfrog.com/i/shapeo.jpg/) or do you think I should lose more weight?
And please don't ask me to tell him straight up. I don't think I could handle that sort of rejection.
Thanks for your help

I think he would go for you. You have to remember that it isn't about weight when it comes to finding someone attractive, it's about their personality. As long as you're a nice person, and you're not rude, people will want to date you. It's not about looks, it's about personality.

Remember, there are beautiful people, but beauty isn't always on the inside as well as on the outside.

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People are finding their famous look alikes and making them their facebook defaults. Is their like a website to do this? How do I do it?

Doppleganger week was just something fun to do on Facebook. As far as I know, there are sites that you can go to so that you can find your look-a-like but it's mostly pictures of people that friends/others tell you that you look like.

Just ask your friends which celeb they think you look like, and then find a picture of them & upload it.

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I've been with my boyfriend for about a year and a half and we're kind of in a rut when it comes to hanging out and running out of things to do. What are some (not super expensive) date ideas?

We've done the usual hanging at houses, renting/going to movies, eating out, mall, etc to death.

There are a lot of things you can do with each other that are cheap & don't cost a lot of money.

You can try bowling, or going to concerts for local bands. Those are usually pretty cheap. You can also try museums or you can bake together whether it be homemade cookies or cupcakes from the box. You can cook dinner and eat it together while watching your favorite TV shows. If you're old enough to go out to a club, go dancing. :)

There are a lot of things you can do. Try & look up things to do in your city on Google. I've done that before & have found a lot of things to do.

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Last Saturday my friend and I went to the mall, I met up with my boyfriend of a year there, well we were sitting on these couches and a bunch of straight edge kids came up and yelled at us, saying we were stupid and disgusting and needed to get the eff out of the mall. My boyfriend got mad but I said to be mature and let's meet up with his friends then leave.

So his friend met up with us ones 15 ones 16 my boyfriend is seventeen i'm sixteen and my friend is sixteen. We're all relatively young and these guys that kept coming by and yelling at us seemed to be 17 and 18.

Well we decided to leave and we left the mall, all of the sudden they came around the corner and started beating up my boyfriend. Two of them pulled out knives on his friends and the rest just started stomping his face and kicking him.

It was almost eleven and really dark. I tried to pull them off my boyfriend and they pushed me down and kicked me a few times and now I have bruises, my boyfriend has a black eye and a scraped up face along with a few sprained fingers.

Well after they beat us up they all booked it. Everyone keeps talking about it and I want everyone to drop it and just forget about it. It really stresses me out for some reason, because one of them goes to my school, and He talked to my friend today and it really made me nervous, I wanted to cry because I was scared, he was the one that kicked me.

I don't want to confront him and I don't want to tell my boyfriend because I know he'd go after this kid, and I know that another fight would start. I know they have knives so I'm afraid they'd hurt him.

It's been almost a week but I can't stop thinking of it and it gives me terrible anxiety, I feel like crying, I'm afraid I feel overwhelmed. I don't know what to do. I want to leave the situation how it is but I don't want to feel this way.

If you're not going to tell your boyfriend, then you need to tell your parents and the police if you haven't already. What they did is assault and it's not okay. They have hurt you, and are capable of hurting you even more if they feel like it. You need to tell the police and say you were jumped and that you want something done about it. Say that the kids who jumped you were/are armed and have a likely chance of coming around for a second try.

Give them the names that you know and let them take care of it. Do not let this go un-taken care of. They will do it again to either you or someone else. Stop the cycle.

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is tap water the same as bottled water essentially?

Pretty much. As long as the tap water isn't brown and you let it run a little bit before drinking it, you'll be alright.

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Hey, so, I have this boyfriend who I've been going out with for about 3 months now. He's the sweetest guy I've ever met and a die hard Christian. I go to church with him every Wednesday night, and our friends tag along. I've been a Christian for most of my life, but there was this period during middle school where I wasn't exactly sure if it was really the right thing for me. I think I may still have a few doubts, but I go with him anyway because all our friends go to, and I figure it might change my mind eventually. However, my boyfriend keeps pressuring me to get saved and give my life to Christ, but I don't think I'm ready for it yet. I've told him multiple times that I feel like he's pushing me into it, but it doesn't seem to make a difference. Now it's gotten to the point where I either do it, or he breaks up with me. I don't think I'm ready for that kind of commitment. I love this boy, and I have no clue what to do. Any suggestions?

Dump him.

I'm sorry to say, but your boyfriend is a prick and is part of the reason why I am not religious. I have nothing against religion, but there are some people out there who just try to force it on others when that is not what some people are interested in. It makes it very hard to be nice and sometimes even be taken seriously as a religious person when there are people like that around. I know not all religious people are like that, many are very open but then there are the few that are also very pushy and rude and not at all like how a religious person should be.

Anyway, with that being said... If it makes you uncomfortable and you are not sure if you want to be a die hard Christian, then it probably isn't for you. You already believe in God and are already a Christian, why do you need to be die-hard? You don't. It's okay to believe in God but still be able to do things for you without making every decision based on the Lord. I think that if you don't want to go all out and you are uncomfortable with the idea, don't do it. Chances are that you'll end up regretting it and it'll make you unhappy. Do whatever you are comfortable with. Do not let some guy who you've been dating for 3 months control you or manipulate you.

If he's really willing to end the relationship because you won't commit your life to a religion, then he has issues and he doesn't deserve you. If he really loved you, he would not be pushing you to do something that makes you uncomfortable. And if he really loved you, he would take your feelings into consideration and leave you alone about it if you said no. Since he is not willing to respect your decision or your feelings, it's best if you end the relationship. You'll be better off that way.

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Okay, I am 15, virgin. I would like to finger myself but I'm not sure how to even do it. How do I break my hymen? Am I to young? I don't know what to do, I want to try it so I know what actual sex will be like, of course when I'm married. However, I'm scared. How do I calm down and just do it? Will it be painful? Just tell me anything, please. I appreciate it.

There are a lot of ways to break a hymen and chances are you might have broken it already. Little things like tampons or sports activities can break it and you might not have known. :)

You're not too young to masturbate. I would say you're at a decent age to start. It's okay to be curious. 15 is an age where lots of kids start to explore their bodies, and explore other things so don't feel guilty. You're not abnormal or anything.

If you want to masturbate, you should probably calm down & relax because if you're tense and uncomfortable, you won't enjoy it. If you want tips on masturbating or a how-to, you can try this:

only search advicenators.com


If you're comfortable and relaxed, it shouldn't be painful. Just remember to be calm. One last thing... Though I don't know you, I'm proud that you want to wait until you're married to engage in sex. Most kids rush into it without realizing that it has serious consequences and it's something that they just cannot handle & end up regretting. Kudos to you for wanting to wait until you're married, ready & responsible to start having sex. :)

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Okay let's say you're having sex with a girl and she cums, can you still continue having sex with her? I know for guys it's different because after they cum they go soft and need some time to get it together again. So basically can you keep going or do you stop? Btw...I'm a girl and was wondering because my guy and I plan on having sex soon.

You sure can. Most girls are able to go multiple times after having an orgasm, and there are some guys who can do that as well.

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