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so my boyfriend and i just had sex for the first time together...he was a virgin i was not...and we both love eachother and so we both decided we didnt want to have "kinky", "horney" sex...we wanted loving, passionate sex..so when we were having sex i expected it to be amazing...but i was kinda dissapointed cus i thought he would look at me , or telll me he loved me while we were doing it...but he dditn..he did not look at my face the whole time...and he didnt say he loved me once....was he just using me for sex..? (link)
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Maybe. But maybe not. He may have been scared, or nervous, or embarrassed. The first time is really scary for everyone.
One good way to find out would be to talk to him about it; how he felt, what he's thinking. It's easy to overlook direct communication, but if you're having sex with him, you need to be comfortable enough to talk to him about it.
Good luck!
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I'm attracted to my social worker. He is 38 and I am in my mid 20's. He's really cute and is so nice to me. He's single, he got a divorce from his wife 4 years ago. Sometimes I have caught him starting at me in an unproffesional way. I've always sensed that he was attracted to me as well. I want to ask him out, but don't know if he would be allowed. Could he get fired if we started dating? (link)
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Yes.
It's generally considered a violation of professional ethics to become romantically involved with a client, particularly in this sort of situation.
If you change to a different social worker, though, it might be permissible to have a relationship with him; a waiting period might be necessary, depending on the standards in your state.
Be very careful if you decide to get more information; it's possible that even the suggestion of a relationship could compromise his position. At the least, don't ask him out; ask him, hypothetically, if he is ethically allowed to date clients. But be aware that he MAY have to end your professional relationship immediately after answering that question, whether or not he goes on to date you.
Good luck, and be careful!
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okay. since i cant let my computer have any viruses.
what will happen if i download limewire, download 10 songs or so and then uninstall it. then just install it whenever i need it.
im willing to do anything not to get a virus. because my mom said if i crash my computer one more time then i cant get it fixed anymore..
and walmart.com has nothing to chose from!
thanks.. (link)
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Forget LimeWire. Use WinMX, the p2p that the RIAA tried to kill but couldn't. They sent letters, shut down the parent company, and within 48 hours a fix had been worked out that allowed the network to work as well or better than it ever had. Not as pretty as LimeWire, and it requires basic computer literacy, but that's a small price to pay.
In addition to AntiVir and Ad-Aware, I recommend Spybot Search & Destroy (http://www.safer-networking.org/) and SpywareBlaster (http://www.javacoolsoftware.com/spywareblaster.html). Update them OFTEN, and ALWAYS right before you download.
Good luck!
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How do you get over it besides popping the pills? (link)
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Clinical depression is a serious neurochemical illness. I'm not a psychiatrist, but my understanding is that depression is normally treated by a combination of medication and therapy.
Anyone who believes that they might be suffering from clinical depression would be very smart to consult with a psychiatrist as quickly as possible, and follow their advice.
Depression is as serious and real as a broken leg, and potentially much more dangerous. If medication is prescribed, take it.
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I am 17 years old and have never had a bf. People in my senior class make fun of me behind my back because of this. I even heard one rumour that I was a lesbian. I'm not a lesbian, I do like guys but I'm really shy and most of the guys in my class are really immature and just want sex, not a meaningful relationship. I've also made the decision not to have sex, or make love until I get married. Some of the girls in my class have slept with over 14 guys, and act like it's no big deal. Sometimes I get so depressed I feel like crying. The fact that tomorrows Valentines day is just going to make me feel worse. Do things ever get any easier for girls like me? Or does it just get worse when I go to college and into the work force? I'm beginning to feel like I'm the only person left with values. (link)
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Life changes in college. A LOT. The culture is generally more mature.
That doesn't mean that there won't be a lot of kids having sex. For some, college is a real soap opera. But it's not that way for everyone. And there are definitely going to be a lot of people in college who feel the same way you do.
I think you'll find life in college to be a lot easier.
I know that Valentine's Day is hard. Sometimes I think that it was deliberately created to make single people miserable! But it's only once a year. Hang on, and you'll get through it.
You're not alone. I was a shy person, too. I didn't even date until I was 33 (and now I'm married and we have a wonderful little boy). I really wouldn't recommend waiting as long as I did, of course.
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what type of things do you study in collage?
specific examples PLEASE. (link)
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Well, first off, it's "college", not "collage". Unless you're planning to be in "an artistic composition of materials and objects pasted over a surface, often with unifying lines and color". :D
In college you can usually chose many if not most of your courses; you have more freedom than in high school. You should be able to check out the website of a specific college and get the course titles.
Some courses that will probably be offered are an introduction to English literature, Shakespeare, and introductory courses for virtually every subject: history, art, mathematics, physics, biology, meteorology, astronomy, sociology, political science, physical education, etc.
The details of any course depend on the preferences of the instructor. Some might assign reading, and require essays. Others might require you to do lab work, and experiments. My favorite courses were seminars, in which a small group of students would sit with the professor and discuss an issue - having done the reading, of course.
I remember reading Plato, Socrates, the Iliad, the Odyssey, Shakespeare, Le Guin, Ernst Becker, Freud, Karl Marx...just a ton of stuff. It helps a lot to be a good, quick reader.
It also generally helps to be able to write essays quickly and well.
Follow-up: You apparently want to go to college, and yet you misspelled it. One thing that DEFINITELY matters in college is spelling, punctuation, correct capitalization, and grammar.
It's also a good idea to use complete sentences.
How you write reflects how you think.
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I have a long-ish labia on one side but nothing on the other side. Is this considered normal or attractive? (link)
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Variation from one side to the other is totally normal. Nobody is perfectly even or symmetrical.
As for attractive...if someone other than your OB/GYN is in a position to take a good look, I guarantee you that they won't be measuring each side and looking for flaws. They'll almost certainly just be happy to be there. :D
In other words, don't worry about it.
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There is a morning radio show I like to listen to, but it's on so early (5-9am) I miss most of it. How can I set up a tape recorder to start taping this show at 5 am? Kind of like a timer on a VCR. Is there a way to do this with a audio tape? (link)
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There are tape decks that will do this for you. Or you can hook up a power timer to a tape deck; I've had success with that.
There are all sorts of power timers, and some are quite cheap. People sometimes use them to turn lights off and on in their houses while they're away on vacation, to discourage burglers. You should be able to pick one up from any department store or hardware store.
The timers usually have one or two plug sockets in the back. You plug your tape deck (or entire stereo) into the timer, and plug the timer into the wall. Set the timer to turn on at the time the show starts (or five minutes earlier), and make sure that you set your tape deck to record before you kill the power.
Not every tape deck will record with a power timer, so you'll need to check that. Press the record button, and then pull out the plug. Wait a minute, then put the plug back in. If the tape deck continues recording, you're all set. Otherwise, you may need to experiment or even get a new recorder.
Some tape decks will let you press the record button even when the power's off, by the way.
Another possibility: have you checked out the radio station's website? They may offer archives of the show there.
Good luck!
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I have pudgy, baby face cheeks and Im a thin, 100, lb 18 year old. Does anyone know of any excersises or something I can do to thin out my pudgy cheeks? (link)
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I've been there - my relatives used to pinch my cheeks so often and hard that I'd get bruises.
Unfortunately there isn't anything you can do to target your cheeks for weight loss. Losing weight overall may decrease the size of your cheeks a bit, but since you're already thin, that wouldn't be a good idea.
This may sound stupid, but have you considered trying to suck them in when she tries to pinch them? You could even make it a joke with her, saying something like "Not this time!".
Another possibility would be to put skin lotion on your face just before you see her - and the lotion should be as slimey as possible. That way, she may not be able to get a good grip.
Or, of course, there's always the obvious solution, the one that people most often overlook: you could talk to her about it. Tell her how the pinching makes you feel, but make sure you also tell her at the same time how much you care about her.
Good luck!
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im getting a treadmill soon and what i want to know is how much should i go on the treadmill each day if i want to lose my chubby stomach ? any hints (link)
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Your body needs at least half an hour of brisk cardiovascular exercise in order to speed up your metabolism. If you don't do at least that much three times a week, you'll be wasting your time and money.
45 minutes would be better still. The point is to get your heart going at a good rate for at least those 30 minutes, though.
The great thing about revving up your metabolism that way is that the effects last for much longer than the exercise. For the next 48 hours or so after a good 30-minute cardio exercise, your body will burn fat at a higher rate - even when you're sleeping! You'll have more energy, too.
For best results, more is better. If you can do it every day, that's better still. But do it at least every other day.
Make sure to stay well-hydrated; drink lots of water, because that will make your workouts more effective and will help you lose weight. Try eating several small, healthy meals throughout the day instead of two or three big meals. And try to find little ways to increase your overall exercise; for example, take the stairs more often (instead of an escalator or elevator).
And don't give up hope. Sometimes it seems like it takes forever to lose much weight. Just stick with it, and eventually your body WILL respond.
Good luck!
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Hey :)
Okey, so it was hard for me to ask this at school since no one gave serious answers, and I'm doing a poll for a school assignment.
If I say "favorite sports team" what is the first thing you thibnk about ?
And it doesnt matter which sport it is. Just give me the names of a bunch of your favorite sports team - or anything else that comes to mind when you hear that.
Thank you loads. (link)
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Red Sox.
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In the song "Across the Universe", a Beatles song that was covered by Rufus Wainwright a couple years ago, there's a line in the chorus that goes, "Jai guru de va om".
Would anyone be able to translate that for me? I don't know what language it's in. I thought it might have been in french but I put it into a translator on the internet and it didn't come up with anything.
Thank you. (link)
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Not too hard.
First, I did a Google search:
lyrics "Across the Universe"
That produced the correct spelling, which is "Jai guru deva om".
Googling THAT led me to a Wikipedia article, which is usually a good source:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jai_Guru_Deva_Om
They have lots to say, but here's the first line:
"In short, the meaning is 'Thanks to the divine teacher'."
Follow the links if you want to know more.
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14f
ok I was sleeping over at my friend's house and at was like 1:oo am and we started to finger each other, suck each other's boobs and touch each other's vagina. Does that mean we are lesbians or was it
all in good fun? BTW what is an orgasm and how do you get one? (link)
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It doesn't necessarily mean that either of you is a lesbian; you might just be bi, or curious. In any case, you are what you are. As you grow, you'll learn more about yourself and your sexuality; you'll be happiest if you accept and enjoy whatever it is that you are.
And of course many people don't really fit into one category or another. So don't worry about it all too much. Whatever makes you happy is fine.
As for orgasms, you might want to check Google:
And I generally find Wikipedia to be very useful:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orgasm
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Next year, I'm going to college, and I am freaking out =(. I'm worried that it will be really hard and that I won't be able to maintain a 3.0 GPA (the requirement to keep my great scholarship effective). So a few questions.
1. Is college really hard? How much time would you say do you have any free time (meaning not having to study, go to college, or work)?
2. Is maintaining a 3.0 possible? (not only possible, but probable?)
3. Are teachers/professors as understanding/nice as high school teachers, or are they "down to business and won't take any crap"? (lol)
Thank you!! Please add any other things that I should know (besides not partying hard and stuff like that..I know) (link)
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Colleges vary. But it's sure to be a very different experience from high school. For one thing, you'll be treated as an adult; you'll get more respect from professors, and that's a fundamentally different relationship from HS.
On the down side, they're much less likely to nursemaid you. If you screw up, they'll eventually take action, but the feedback on your overall academic performance may not come to you (not to mention your parents) anywhere near as quickly as it did in HS.
Is it hard? That really depends on what courses you take, and what your academic strengths are. And, of course, how hard you want to push yourself. For me, it wasn't as hard as high school; but that's partly because the whole social scene was different. Having said that, I will say that it's a mistake to take a route that's TOO easy for you. I took a lot of sociology courses, because they were easy for me. And while I learned some interesting stuff and ended up picking up a second major in soc/anth, to be terribly honest that degree has been useless to me.
If I could go back, I'd almost certainly go all-out for computer science. And the SINGLE course that has proved most useful to me - BY FAR - was a Computer Literacy 101 course that was taught by a sociology professor. Because before that, I was afraid of computers (this was in the late 1980s); after that course, I loved them.
And now I work heavily with computers. Go figure.
3.0 is certainly possible, and even practical. Just keep on top of things. As you obviously already know, it's really easy to get into a partying scene that will totally destroy your standing. I saw that happen a LOT.
College is a time of INCREDIBLE opportunity. Try to make the best of it. I wish I had.
Good luck!
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Ok, so I masturbate on school nights out of fear that I won't be too horny the next day and look at one of my friends the wrong way, ya know? But lately it hasn't been working so well, I still feel horny sometimes when I am at school. Don't suggest doing it in the morning because I barely have enough time for breakfast as it is, add that and well, it'd get messy. And also I have enough morals not to do it at school. So, if anyone knows the cure to unrelenting horniness please tell me.
15/m (link)
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You're not going to like this, but the only real cure for horniness is age. And it's not really a cure; it just damps down the urgency a bit, makes it easier to cope with.
Relaxation and meditation techniques might help a little, but I really don't know.
There are medications which can cut down on your sex drive, but that's a side-effect, not the main purpose of those medications. No doctor would prescribe them to you just for horniness. And any or all of them could be very dangerous for you.
I think you're going to have to live through it, the way that all the rest of us have. If it's any comfort, right now your self-consciousness is at a lifetime high, too - so your state of arousal is almost certainly NOT as obvious to your friends as you think. For one thing, they're probably all almost totally preoccupied with their OWN horniness.
Good luck!
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I know this is going to sound like a very strange question, but I need to know if this is normal and if there is anything I can do. I have trouble reaching orgasm; I always seem to have to "stop" before, as if my body can't handle it. It's the same if I'm alone or with my boyfriend. I know I CAN, it just takes a really long time. Is this typical, and what can I do? Thanks in advance.
20/f (link)
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I don't believe that it's typical, although everyone is different. Some medications and medical conditions can affect the ability to orgasm, so you should look over the side effects of anything you might be taking.
It might just be that you need more time. But since it's bothering you, you should talk to your OB/GYN or doctor. They may be able to help.
Good luck!
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I'm 14 and i have never had a boyfriend. Is that sad? Like so many people have bit i have never and i makes me feel sorta bad. Is that like really sad to have never had a boyfriend when you are 14? (link)
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I didn't have my first kiss or date until I was...wait for it...33.
And now I'm married and have an incredible little son. So no, it doesn't sound too sad to me.
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Hey guys,
I want guys to answer this one k? or grls but i think guys would make the most sence lol. Any way I was wondering what makes a girl likable or attractive? (and i dont mean shallow stuff like giant boobs!!! or anything, even though....we all know that doesn't hurt tehe) Like what kind of clothes? Hair up or down? Like....idk just what pysical and little quirks (cute little things she does) makes a girl attractive?
ok much love guys...and girls ;)
(link)
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A good smile. The little signs that she feels good about herself - good posture, looking other people in the eye, that sort of thing.
And the great thing about those is that ANYONE can do them, and they're quite effective. Looks still matter, but the right attitude and self-confidence will improve anyone's appeal.
It's actually a good idea to make a habit of smiling, if you can. A lot of people let their faces relax into a frown, but that can be overcome with practice.
I'm not saying to grin like an idiot, but even a slight smile is 100 times more attractive than a blank stare or frown. And you never know when the right person might glance your way.
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I was charging my phone up tonight and I accidently knocked it off from my TV stand into a glass of coke on the floor. I immediatly grabbed it and wiped all the coke off and took out the battery and all that. it lights up but there are no words or sounds. I got this phone about 4 months ago and its a Spring LG. Is my phone completly fried and I need to get a new one or can i fix this? (link)
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I'm sorry, but the outlook isn't good for your phone. Coke is just about the worst thing that you can mix with electronics.
You might be able to save it by getting some filtered or distilled water (distilled would be better), moistening a clean cloth, squeezing out most of the water, and wiping your phone down completely. Take out the battery, clean it, and wipe the phone inside, too - gently. Then let it all dry (overnight at least) before re-inserting the battery and turning it on. If it still doesn't work, I'm afraid you'll probably need to have it professionally serviced or replaced. You should check to see if you have a service agreement or phone insurance, because that might save you some of the cost. But they'll probably still charge you SOMETHING, because soaking your phone is a pretty standard reason for them to charge you a replacement fee.
Much as I hate to disagree with another columnist, baking your battery would be EXTREMELY dangerous. It could even cause an explosion or fire.
I've heard about "baking" soaked cell phones before, but that was at 150 ° - and those cell phones had been accidentally WASHED, not dunked in Coke. The sugar in Coke will not "dry away". And 350° is likely to melt your battery at the very least.
Consumer electronics and high temperatures don't mix. If you really get desperate, use a hair dryer on your phone for no more than five minutes at a time - but DON'T get it too hot.
Good luck!
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ok, so without disclosing my age, we'll say im over the age of 18, I recently started babysitting an infant that is teething. I babysit him from 5am to 5pm, so I've got my hands full. I've never had children of my own but I have always loved kids and yes, I know how to take care of him as far as feeding, burping and such ok so my question is, he's fine and dandy as long as I am holding him 24 hours a day, but I cant hold him all the time, i need both my hands to fix his bottles and such, but if I put him down, he screams his head off and will NOT stop. What is his deal? I think he is just spoiled a couple of ppl have told me to just put him down and let him cry it out but that makes me feel like a bad person for doing that. any advice? p.s. he's 4 months old. (link)
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It could be colic. Does he cry like that for his parents? At four months I don't think an extended crying-out period is a good idea.
People give all sorts of stupid advice when it comes to children. I actually had people seriously tell me that A) lead levels in a child were nothing to worry about, and B) to rub whisky on my baby's gums when he was teething.
Good luck!
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