NinjaNeer's advice column

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Q: I would gladly go for a run on weekends or again after my sports practice but I have a medical condition (which I hate with a burning passion, it holds me back from being the athlete I wish I was) that makes it difficult for me to do so much cardio. Thalassemia, it's a type of anemia, I have the minor one, doesn't usually show symptoms, but unfortunately I do. I can usually last fro running about a mile at a jog and then I have to take a break. My doctor said it's like having a 25-30% handicap. I hate it, and a lot of why I hate it is because people don't realize the problem I have and just assume I'm not trying, but keeping up with them is so hard, so I'm trying very hard. Sorry for the rant, I know I shouldn't complain about it - it's not like it rules my life and it could be tons worse, but I get so mad at myself because I actually am a decent athlete it's just this keeping me from having the endurance I need. Not to mention my doctor also thinks I may have asthma so I also use an inhaler.

Anyway, if I'm working on losing weight, and I'm trying to eat right, getting exercise is going to be harder for me.

My question here is does it matter how quickly you run? If I'm still going for a mile will it have the same effect as someone who runs a mile in 7 minutes? (My mile time is generally around 9 minutes and 20 seconds when I try my hardest, and I probably won't get much better because of my condition, I've already come a long way.)

Thanks!

I have borderline severe asthma, so I know what you're going through. I can't run at all!

What you need to do is a different way to exercise. There's more than just running out there. Try something else, like bike riding, or just speed-walking. As long as you're getting some exercise, you're doing well.

My personal choice was karate; the club I was at was very accommodating of my health issues, and didn't push me any harder than I wanted to push myself. It's not too cardio-intensive, but it gets a little cardio workout in your routine.

Q: my mum is really annoying me such as consistantly nagging on at me and because of this i am shouting back abuse at her! She has told loads of her friends and my neighbours and they dont treat me in the same way anymore and dont bother very much! If they so its " be nice to your parents" i am sick of it i dont no how to get my neighbours and parents friends to like me again? i no the obvious answer is to not be rude to my mum but its immpossible shes always nagging on at me ! HELP! XX

I know I come off as sounding old and incredibly biased, but I was in your position a couple of years ago, and I've learned a lot since... (I'm 19 now)

You do have to be respectful to your mother. Your neighbours and her friends are entirely right in thinking you're not a nice kid, because your true colours are coming out when you deal with your mother.

It's kind of her job to nag at you. She's your mom. And what seems like nagging is actually a really important part of your upbringing; she's trying to help you become a successful adult.

So, the answer? Be nice to your mom. Apologize to her for the verbal abuse and shouting. Let her know that you're trying to live up to her expectations, but that you're still learning.

Appreciate it while you've got it, because when you're out on your own, there's nobody to tell you what to do or when.

Q: Can someone tell me the answer to this?

1. The scale of two similar quadrilaterals is 1:2. The perimeter of the smaller quadrilateral is 80 centimeters. What is the perimeter of the larger quadrilateral?

A. 40cm
B. 80cm
C. 160cm
D. 320cm

THANKS!

Here's an explanation as to why C is right... knowing the answer doesn't mean anything, you have to understand it!

The perimeter of the smaller quadrilateral can be expressed as 2L + 2W = 80 or, when factored, 2( L + W)= 80. This means that L + W = 40.

If the scale is 1:2, that means that each side on the larger quadrilateral is twice as big as the corresponding side on the smaller quadrilateral.

SO...

L for the larger one is 2L, or twice the length of the corresponding side on the smaller quadrilateral. Vice versa for the width (2W).

SO...

Perimeter for the larger one is 2(2L) + 2(2W) = ??

OR

4L + 4W = ??

Factor it...

4( L + W )= ??

Above, we figured out that L + W is 40, right? Sub it in...

4( 40 ) = 160.

Q: okay this might seem like a stupid question but serouisly i have to wonder. haha
okay
Q1: if a tree falls and no ones around to hear it, does it make a sound?
for my answer that would be a yes because wiether [sp] you hear it or not its going to make a sound. anyone think differently and why.

Q2: what came first, the chicken or the egg?
for that one i would say the chicken because the chicken has to lay eggs. so if there was no chicken there could be no egg. so you couldnt start with just an egg. and besides i think it was the chicken since like.. the egg has to be taken care of inorder to live so.. the egg wouldnt be the first one. anyone agree/disagree. and whyy?

thaankss haha. i just wanted to know what you thought of these. =] chyeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

As a complete and utter science nerd, I'm going to argue with all of you regarding the first question.

When the tree falls, it sends a shockwave through the air. That compressed air only becomes a sound when it enters eardrums and is processed by a brain. Otherwise, it's only compressed air, and, therefore, not a sound.

As for the second question, evolution answers that question quite neatly. Technically, the chicken didn't exist before the egg; fish, then reptiles, then bird-like reptiles all existed before the chicken. So the egg was there first, but what came out of it changed gradually over millions of years.

Q: i need help! i don't know if im wrong ...ok so i have a boyfrien , and he's nice and everything , but today we went on an argument about him not oppening the car door for me ...am i wrong for wanting him to do it?? even though he's nice and open places doors for me etc??..i told him i'd like that ..and he said :S its not like im going to be your slave or anything! can't you open it yourself??? ...and i was like ..i can obviously , but i would appreciate if you'll do it ....he sad your spoiled! its like i have feelings too! and im a person too why do i have to be all day after you doing evrything for you opening doors for you and for me who will do it? nobody does it for me , why do you have to be better than me ? we are both equal! ... then it turn into a big fight but am i wrong :S??????

Unfortunately, the age of chivalry seems to be dying... but that's the end result of the feminist movement.

Because women have been so aggressive about being equal, and not being waited upon, most men have given up on the whole knight in shining armour role.

You really shouldn't have asked him. That makes it seem like you expect special treatment, and don't appreciate what he does already.

Q: my boyfriend and i have been having sex for over six months now, but it doesn't seem as pleasant when he uses a condom. Does anyone have any solutions as to other things we could use for protection instead?

If you can be sure that he's going to stay faithful (and you, too!), and if you are both tested negative for STDs, then you can start looking into other contraceptives.

The one I would recommend, and am on is Depo Provera, the injected contraceptive. It is 99.9% effective against pregnancy (condoms are only 98%). You get it once every 3 months, just a shot, and it keeps you baby-free (and period-free!!) for those 3 months. It's the most fool-proof method, also.

There's the oral contraceptive, or 'the pill'. That's about 99% effective, if taken properly. Unfortunately, lots of things can go wrong with it; if you're taking antibiotics, that can mess with the effectiveness, or if you throw up before you absorb it.

I would NOT recommend NuvaRing or Evra. Nuvaring is a flexible ring that you insert into your vagina and leave there for 3 weeks. I used it and it gave me terrible infections (blech). Evra, the patch, is a transdermal contraceptive. It works a lot like the nicotine patches. Problem is, it has a nasty tendency to fall off, and then it's rendered useless.

That's what I know based on my personal experiences.

Remember, though, that if you are concerned about STDs, then you should always use a condom.

Q: what's the best shampoo and conditioner in your opinion?

My favourite is really cheap.

I love Suave Coconut or Strawberry shampoo and conditioner. It's about 2 dollars a bottle, and it smells really yummy.

Q: 19 f

ok so i need to write a twenty page paper for my college psychology class. My teacher is kind of a flake and didnt really explain anything all that well on the format. I was just wondering if anyone new of a website that showed how to do APA format on papers. I know how to do references but i dont know the exact guidlines for papers. If anyone knows anything about APA format please let me know it would be greatly appreciated thanks!

My friend found a website that does the bibliographical format for you... all you have to do is enter the information, and it will give you your entry.

http://www.calvin.edu/library/knightcite/index.php

That should help!

Q: i've seen people say it, but what does it mean?

rofl copter.
i know rofl but is it like from a movie?
or a song? something
b/c people have been using it
and it's my friend's name on myspace

It's just an expansion on ROFL... rolling on the floor laughing.

Like LMAOnnaise!

Q: it seems latly the only thing that anyone wants to do is either hook up or have sex. what happened to guys genuinly wanting to take girls out and being gentleman. is it me? im just tired of getting these guys who are just interested in getting in my pants. whatever. i just want to know if there are any guys out there who are still gentleman

I'm 19/F too. There are gentlemen out there! My boyfriend is one of them. He's the kind who opens doors, and helps you out of the car, etc. It's really sweet :)

Pretty much, there are a lot of those guys out there, but girls end up making them into 'just friends' or not being attracted to them. I have a friend who complains all the time about what jerks the guys she dates are. Then, she tried dating a guy she wasn't particularly sexually attracted to, and lo and behold he was really nice, and treated her really well.

Summary: try dating those guys who may not be 'hot', someone you can be friends with.

Q: So, at my school we have a TON of international kids[most are from Asia]. Well, there is this one guy(he is Korean) that has had my eye for a while now. We make eye contact often and at morning meeting thing [our form of school announcments] he always sits next to me. I've never talked to him before, but I want to start. The only problem is, is that he isn't very good with English and I only see him hanging around with the other Asians at school. How can I begin a conversation with him without it being too awkward/random and confusing? Thanks =]
Btw, Im a female high schooler.

DO NOT ask if they like America! You never know when you're going to get an American in the bunch, and then you seem like a bigoted jerk.

I've got tons of Asian friends. Really, it's no different from starting a conversation with anyone else.

Some things to avoid in conversation are long or obscure words and colloquialisms.

Just be prepared to explain what you mean sometimes. I have a friend from China, and explaining to her what a nipple was without showing her one was hilarious!

Q: i no that this is kinnda sad. but i can not punch for my life ! what do i do ? how do i make it work

I used to teach childrens' white belt karate classes... so here's how you do it karate-style.

To start, make a proper fist. Make sure your fingers are all tucked in, with your thumb over top. DO NOT tuck your thumb in, and don't let it stick out past your knuckles.

With your hand in a fist, pull it back as far as you can. Your fist should be level with your chest, palm up. I know it's not quite comfortable, but it's how you get more power.

When you punch, use your other arm to help your punch gain momentum. Pull it in to the same position your punching arm started in.

While extending your arm, gradually twist your arm until your hand is facing palm down.

I know it sounds really complicated, but it's a lot harder to teach in writing!

Q: F/17

Me and my bf have been dating for 6 months now. When we make out it's great. But the problem is that when I give him a bllow job, it kinda smells bad. I put his dick in really deep which makes me wanna puke. The skin over there rolls back and he likes it but I dont because the cum there doesn't taste great. The end result is, he's not satisfied and I make a big fool of myself. How do I drive him crazy. I would appreciate any extra tips on driving a guy crazy while making out. Thanx.

It sounds to me like he isn't practicing good hygiene. If a guy takes good care of himself, there shouldn't be anything gross tasting under his foreskin. If you can, shower with him before-hand. If you can't, then use a flavoured condom like the person below suggested.

You don't have to deep-throat. Just using your tongue and lips on the head is usually enough.

A tip for driving him crazy: there's a little bump on the underside, where the head meets the shaft. Flicking that with your tongue works wonders :)

Q: Okay well my dog is 6 years old and since this whole food thing has happened we are worried he might be sick from it. In recent news they just revealed that it had been found in dry dog food also. Well we had been feeding my dog IAMS, which was recently pulled off the shelf. We got that bag of dog food 3 weeks to a month ago. And he just through up. But he has threw up before and it could also be because we were on vacation for the weekend so we gave him food & water and put him in my bathroom since itd be better than a cage and its bigger. So do you think it could just be axienty because we were gone or could he have that disease from the food. Also what are some of the simptoms of that food disease. Sorry if this was alittle confusing.

There is no magical 'food disease'. The pet food recalls are for melamine content, which is causing kidney failure.

It's definitely not the food. If your dog's kidneys were failing, he shouldn't be vomiting. My dog died of renal kidney failure in November, and he wasn't vomiting.

If he's vomiting, it might be anxiety, or it might just be him being a dog. Sometimes they eat too much, or eat something they shouldn't. Occasional vomiting is to be expected from dogs.

Q: Does chocolate make you fat?
How about popcorn?

Any food can make you fat, if you eat enough of it.

Everything is okay to eat, IN MODERATION.

Q: I am17 years old and 7 months ago my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. I got pregnant and he left me, now I am pregnant with triplets. My mom says that I shouldnt give them away. I'm not sure what to do.

This issue is about what is best for the children.

Would you like your children raised by a single teenage mom, or by a family who wants them and can take care of them?

Are you emotionally ready to have three children always needing you?

Would you be able to support your children financially?

Can you afford to send them to daycare while you work to support them?

What about their college education? Will you be able to help them financially then?

These babies didn't ask to be born. They deserve every opportunity in life that you can give them; if that means giving them up, then that's what you have to do.

Now for yourself.

Do you have plans for your future (i.e. education)?

Are you willing to put up with the stigma of being a teen mother?

Are you willing to give up dating? You won't have time for it with three children to take care of. Plus, no teenage guy wants to walk in on a ready-made family.

Once you've thought of what's good for the babies, think about what's good for you. This isn't just a couple of years; you've got a lifetime commitment ahead of you that you may not be able to fulfill.

Good luck.

Q: I use to love to read. I haven't read in long time. I try least read anybook. problem is I cna't focus maybe interess of book or maybe I don't get it. thing is I am kind in lower grade level. I read different leveal of books, ok I am 4th grade level but I can read high school level to. but thing is that I can't seem get intress in and focus. can ya give me reasons I should stop and read? or ther any books that would draw you in no matter what?

Between fourth grade and high school? That's a pretty big range.

Try reading the Series of Unfortunate Events books... they're a lot of fun, pretty short, and fairly easy to understand.

Another really good book is Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card. It's about a kid who is sent to military academy in space, and it has a great twist ending.

Q: My little sister is 10. She got her perod when she was 9. She is a pretty big slu* and she had sex 8 monthes ago. So know she is 10 and 8 months pregnant. I would like to know if their is any way she can get an abortion. My mom and dad will be back from their 6 month trip to Paris in 2 weeks and they can't see her pregnant or she will be put up for adoption or something please help, she may not be able to make it through child birth!

If your sister is old enough to be having sex, she's old enough to deal with the consequences.

At 8 months, there is no way that she can get an abortion. Up to 3 months is the limit.

She's going to have to face up to your parents, and deal with the consequences of her actions.

If she lies, that's only making it worse. DO NOT say, as the person below suggested, that she was raped. It reeks of untruth. If she was raped, I'm sure that they would have known about it.

This is exactly why children should not be having sex. Until you're old enough to support a child if you were to get pregnant, you should NOT be having sex.

I wish the best of luck to your sister, and I hope she learns from her mistake.

Q: Do fat people get boyfriends//girlfriends?
Cause the basic trend is dieting your butt off and you rarely see 'fatties' getting bf//gfs.
I'm pretty fat will i get a bf? I mean I hve faith I'll get married and stuff but will i get a bf who will appreciate me?

First of all, I find your question pretty offensive. Referring to overweight people as 'fatties', and assuming that they can't have meaningful relationships is a terrible attitude to have.

That said, I am overweight, and I didn't date much in high school; they boys all wanted the really skinny girls. As I've become older, they seem to prefer girls with some meat on their bones.

I'm also wondering how you were planning on getting married without finding a boyfriend who appreciates you...

Q: Im starting birth control to try and regulate my periodes and some side effects risk if your smoke and i do and im not sure if i should continue and not care or stop...

The reason they tell you not to smoke and take birth control is that it increases your risk of blood clots. It's really dangerous to do the both.

Either find another way to do birth control, or stop smoking. I'd suggest the latter, myself.

bio

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.