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please its important for me
i need help! i don't know if im wrong ...ok so i have a boyfrien , and he's nice and everything , but today we went on an argument about him not oppening the car door for me ...am i wrong for wanting him to do it?? even though he's nice and open places doors for me etc??..i told him i'd like that ..and he said :S its not like im going to be your slave or anything! can't you open it yourself??? ...and i was like ..i can obviously , but i would appreciate if you'll do it ....he sad your spoiled! its like i have feelings too! and im a person too why do i have to be all day after you doing evrything for you opening doors for you and for me who will do it? nobody does it for me , why do you have to be better than me ? we are both equal! ... then it turn into a big fight but am i wrong :S??????
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Let me start off by saying this:
DON'T OVERREACT
because my ex and I had kinda a situation like this,I dumped him...
and I realized it was the biggest mistake of my life.
and you do nOT want to end up where I did.
I mean, you both have points.
you want him to show affection,
but he dosen't want to feel like you're controlling him.
If he dosen't open the car door, it's no big deal.
He opens the doors at places, right?
So it's ok.
Just apologize for overreacting and tell him everything he does is fine.
good luck <3
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Unfortunately, the age of chivalry seems to be dying... but that's the end result of the feminist movement.
Because women have been so aggressive about being equal, and not being waited upon, most men have given up on the whole knight in shining armour role.
You really shouldn't have asked him. That makes it seem like you expect special treatment, and don't appreciate what he does already.
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When a guy takes a girl out the polite thing is to open the car door for her...its not actually rude not to, but if he knows that you would appreciate it, then i think that he should do it just to make you happy (even if he thinks its stupid). You are definitely not wrong, but don't let a fight over something like this ruin your relationship.
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If he opens other doors for you without you even having to ask...don't argue about the car door.
Really, it might be polite if he did, but it isn't necessary. Especially if you are going to argue about it. It really doesn't mean much if you have to ask anyway. If you care for this guy, just take him as he is. A non-Car door-opener. :)
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Hey!
Well I can't pick sides here, because I'm not in the situation, but I'll show you a few things, and maybe you can make up your own mind okay? :D
First of all, I like it when guys open up doors for me, but the car door may be a bit much. At least thats how I feel. I can see how he would feel like a slave if you want him to open a car door for him, because thats something that butlers do.
He is right on the equal thing, for years and years women have tried to work their way up to being equal with men, in the down side to that, yeah we lost a few of those sweet things guys do. But we dont have to stay home all day washing floors and we are aloud to wear pants in most cases, so I think that it all works out to be even.
It was rude of him to say that you're spoiled, and stuff though.
So heres what I would do, Whether or not you feel that he is right, relationships are all about communicating and trying to find a happy medium. So tell him that you over reacted, and that you may have been wrong (even if you dont feel that way) and that you want to be equal with him, and you think he's amazing, and you don't feel better than him, you just thought that was something that guys did for the girls they love (or a word less than love if you arent there yet). Tell him that you appreciate all he does, and it means a lot to you when he does those little things like opening doors and stuff, and you think that it proves that he is a real gentleman, but you love (or substitue for love) him whether he does it or not, and you hate that he feels that you don't appreciate it because you really do. Tell him that you hope he isnt angry with you, and that it was a silly little thing and you hope it didnt hurt him.
Whether or not you actually agree with that, I don't know, but its all about giving alittle for the other person, I doubt you'll get car doors from that, but hopefully he'll still open regular doors for you. Good luck, and I hope I helped, Love ya,
Angie91
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Girl its not wrong for you wanting him to open the car door for you. All gentlemen should do that and if he doesnt like it tell him to grow up and stop being lazy. And if he argues with you over the dumbest stuff hes not the one!
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You did nothing wrong!! In mean you asked him, it wasnt like you TOLD him hehad tooor anything! I think that he blew it out of proportion and he needs to apoligize for getting out of hand. And if he does apolgize accept it, because its hard for guys to admit they are wrong
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your not totally wrong you want your boyfriend to spoil you and for him to be your perfect prince but on the other hand try to be in your boyfriends persission you want him to do everything for you thats the way boys minds think if you start asking them to open the car door.
you need to talk to your boyfriend and see what he feels like when you start asking him things like that.your boyfriend is surppose to do stuff for you and proberly does but the door thing proberly went to far for him.
i hope everything works out,xxaoifexxx
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i think you both have a point. maybe he is feeling a little like you dont care about his well being, that your just using him. Make sure he knows that hes special to you, you could surprise him with something of his favorite. You could open your own door occasionally, dont force him to do anything. you still have the right to want to have him open it. Hope i helped
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