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December 1, 2010Answers:
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about
I am straight to the point, My advice is given based on my opinions of what YOU write. I may not always tell you what you want to hear but I am not here to sugar coat shit.
I am honest, I am blunt, At times an asshole but one thing I can promise, I'll never lie.
advice
Well I'm 11 and when I was 10 my brother-in-law lifted up my skirt and ever since he was asking me for naked pictures and he's tried kissing me and touching me he sent me sexual messages so I told my mom about them and I deleted the messages so I didn't have proof for the police I told my sister about him lifting up my skirt but she didn't believe me please help me I don't know what to do! Oh yes and he has a child and he's 32
Report it
That is 100% wrong of what he is doing, This man is sick. Sweetie, If he ever sends you a text message or pictures PLEASE save it and go to Mom or Dad and tell them what happened so they can go to the police and have this dirty man arrested.
PLEASE report him! This man is a pedophile and a child molester and if he has a child imagine what he could be doing to them? :(
Recently, I found out my wife was shaving an online affair with an old fling from high school. They were planning on cheating together. After confronting her the emails tapered off and she became more open about the guy. We have been going to counseling. During our sessions she admitted that she believed that she was hitting it off with this other guy because "he gets" her and he could make her laugh. They have some background that obviously helped them to get back together. My wife says she wants us to stay together and she wants things to work. I talked to the guy and he says things have turned only to a friendship and I shouldn't be threatened by him. Recently, my wife had a heart to heart discussion with me and she stated that she didn't really feel love for me all of the time. She knows I'm trying to win her over and appreciates the things I have been doing. She says she wants to feel something and she wants me to "fight for her". She went on to say that it seemed as though when I found out about the affair I didn't really seem phased by it. I know this has a lot to do with what my parents went through and the fact that I had always had a feeling she was seeking out someone else.She told me that if she ever did decide to go after someone else she would tell me because she wouldn't want to have secrets. I know we are doing better now but, I'm wondering what she really means by fighting for her. I have been helping out around the house a lot more and have even ramped up on the gifts and spontaneously sending flowers. I have even paid her more compliments about her looks and things that she does. So I guess I'm confused as to what else I need to do.
One thing that raises an alarm with me is the fact that you stated well a few things actually.....
1, Your wife doesn't feel love for you all the time
Either you love someone or you don't, That part is a bit confusing to me.
2, Your wife would tell you if she was seeking someone else but yet she couldn't tell you about the emails and the fact that she was loosing interest in the marriage?
3, You are buying her flowers spontaneously
How often are you buying gifts and flowers? I'm just pointing it out because although gifts and flowers are nice from time to time after awhile she is may either start to expect these gifts or get extremely bored to where gifts are no longer meaningful on special occasions because she has finally gotten used to it.
Really, Take Razhie advice here - She needs to cut all contact with the man who almost cost you your marriage.
Marriage counseling is a big step but we also need to acknowledge that it also can only go so far, BOTH parties need to be willing to make a marriage work not one. I would even suggest if possible you and your wife take a vacation. Somewhere you both can work on your marriage and strengthen your bond. Communication goes a long way, If there are any signs that you aren't giving the attention your wife wants then she needs to step up and communicate.
Good luck..
me 16 bf 18
everytime my boyfriend lets me down or makes me sad he says that he is not worthy of being with me..he also says that since he cannot stop loving me the only way out is killing himself..he never wants to cause my depression or make me cry but he does..I really love him and sometimes I get extremely scared because I really don't know what he is capable of doing..I am afraid that if I don't feel the same way in the future I will be forced to stay with him because of this..what should I do? :(
So basically in other words he is threatening to killing to himself if you leave? Yes, I said threatening....
Let someone know what is doing and break up with him. That is manipulation and it is not healthy to be in a relationship where someone is putting stress like that on you. It's emotional abuse, He is using the whole killing himself as a way to get you to stay with him.
Nobody can ever make you be in a relationship you are not happy in. Your "boyfriend" cannot force you to be in the relationship and he needs to seek some professional help. He does not own you and what he is doing is controlling and manipulating you. Yes, You should leave him and you should cut contact with him. The guy doesn't deserve you as a girlfriend he does not deserve you as a friend. Toughen up and leave his ass you deserve better. Staying in the relationship with someone like that is going to drain you trust me, I was in a relationship with someone who was a manipulative ass and it not only drained me mentally and emotionally it drained me physically. I left, It was the best damn thing I could of ever done for myself.
ok so me and my boyfriend were just enjoying our time then i had to go to another school and so we dont see eachother a lot and theres this guy that im really close with because hes going to be my cousin and so i texted him most of the day and my boyfriend wouldnt answer my texts and then my boyfriend found out and texted me and said,"so you have been texting this person more than me," i said that isnt very bad and the he told me that he thinks that i love the person more than him. i love him way to much and i only love him but i dont think he understands me.
what should i do so that me understands that i only love him and thats all???
When your in a relationship your partner should be a main priority not your friends. Yes, It sounds like your boyfriend may have some slight insecurity and trust issues but on the other hand I can understand where he may be coming from.
You are giving all your attention to another dude, It's okay to have friends and talk to them but to ignore your significant other is just not right. You may be giving this "friend" a little too much attention to the point where your boyfriend feels neglected in some way. If you don't want your boyfriend to feel neglected then I seriously would start paying more attention to him. Either that or loose the relationship and watch him walk.......
when I was little I had 3 cavities and they all came out but i still have bad breath idnt know why i brush my teeth once a day and i dnt floss and when i do floss it has a odor. that s the place where i used to have my cavities. what can id do.?
You know, I actually just read an article this morning about home remedies and happened to come across this...
Yogurt to Cure Bad Breath
Bad breath comes from a number of places, the two most common being the mouth and the stomach. The neutralizing powers of yogurt and other probiotics treat the latter cause. "Yogurt shouldn't have any effect at all on the bacteria that live on the tongue because it's not there long enough," says Robert Meltzer, MD, a New York City-based gastroenterologist and attending physician at Lenox Hill Hospital. However, it likely has a neutralizing effect on the acid that resides anywhere between the mouth and the stomach, including the back of the throat and the esophagus, he explains. "I think almost any milk product or food that contains live cultures would have the same effect." While yogurt can get rid of bad breath that results from gastrological conditions, like acid reflux, it won't have any real effect on bad breath that is the product of gum, liver or lung disease, says Ohio-based dentist Matthew Messina, DDS.
Sometimes bad breath is caused from the gums, However try this remedy and see if it helps any. ;)
so I had very lengthy hair in the 3rd and 4Th grade but now am in the 10th and my hair is really short and doesn't look like it wants to grow I am 14.I really wish I had long hair. I am from the Bahamas.
and I am black. I have taken maternal pills they helped a little but now idnt have any more. what can I do to make my hair grow faster?
Maternal pills??? There is nothing you can do to make your hair grow faster, Trust me I've already done every research possible.
It is a proven fact that hair grows about 1 inch per month, So even when you think your hair isn't growing at all it actually is. It's just not growing in a extremely noticeable length. The closest thing I've come across is if you massage your scalp on a daily basis it may help your hair growth because you are creating stimulation in the blood flow. However, Maternal pills are just going to be a waste of money. There is nothing that is going to make your hair grow faster. Wish there was though...
Sometimes when Im at home, I cant see anything for a few seconds and then I can see again. It happens a lot everyday. Its been happening for a while and its gotten worse. I cant see anything but the dark for a few seconds. what is this?
sometimes when I stand up I loose all vision and get light headed. I do wear contacts. Why do I go blind sometimes?
Sometimes i got blind for a few seconds, like ill stand up and ill get this weird feeling in my head and i wont be able to see for about a second or two.
I get dizzy, cand black dots start to appear everywhere & then my ears start ringing & everything goes dark
We are not doctors, We cannot give you a diagnosis.
If you are blacking out and have been for some time then you need to make an appointment and a see a doctor a.s.a.p.
y do people try to stop people when they want to die? its probably for a good reason that they do not want to live anymore
I generally stay away from questions like these to avoid the aggravation but seeing you asked why...I'll give it a shot.
People only live once, There is nothing that should ever make someone want to end their lives. Honestly? I really believe that suicide is the cowardly way out. Everyone goes through shit in their lives, People lose houses, Jobs etc. but they don't go around just killing themselves over it. You seek professional help not suicide
When you commit suicide you end EVERYTHING and there is no going back. It's gone forever, 20,30,40 years down the line it's gone.....
You leave behind family, Friends, and future people you would meet in your life. The pain and the stupidity of being selfish has a massive effect on those who love and care about you. People go around asking why this person chose to end it this way, Why they couldn't just seek help or talk to someone about their problems.....
Everyone is here for a reason, Everyone has a reason to be here. Killing yourself because life isn't exactly how you want it at the moment is just plain selfish and wrong.
I have no interest in becoming anorexic but seriously, how do they eat so little for so long!? I went 2 days without eating because, well I forgot lol. Anyway, I eat so much, like a LOT!!! I couldn't imagine ever not eating for so long! Are anorexics really that determined? Thanks! :D
I just wanted to point out too you, That if you weren't thinking about becoming one then you wouldn't be here asking......
Anorexia is a mental illness, It is not something we can just decide to do. Also, While starving yourself is not healthy it can come with serious consequences.
Infertility, Hair loss, Organ failure, tooth decay, irregular heat beat and even death
If you want to loose weight, Do it the healthy way by watching what you eat and exercising. We just recently had a question about someone asking if they were bulimic or not and it seriously amazes me just how lazy an un-knowledgeable some people are. There is NO easy way to loose weight! Anorexia won't do it and neither will Bulimia. Going a day or two not eating can actually cause reverse effect of making you gain weight from being malnourished. Seriously, Get off the couch and exercise.
So last week I dyed my hair light brown, it was blond faded from pink, so my hair has bits of red in it which actually looks cute with the brown since it's very subtle. I decided to do something a bit crazy and bought n'rage black dye it's demi-permanent. I put it under my bangs and it looked really cute. Until it faded to this ugly as hell dark green, now it looks horrid. What's a good way to fade this as much as possible so I can dye over it? Bleach isn't really an option, I am trying to keep my hair healthy. PLEASE HELP!
Dying your hair too much is not healthy...
What I would do is buy color oops which takes out all the dye out of your hair. After that, Leave your hair alone for awhile. The green is a sign that your hair has had enough....
Hi. So recently I have started making myself throw up. The first time was this one night when I was really depressed about everything. It felt like I could no longer change anything about my life, so I wanted to change my appearance. At first nothing came out except clear saliva, but slowly my dinner began to make it's way back up. I have made myself throw up three times after this. This began about 2 weeks ago. Does this make me bulimic?
Yes
By the way Bulimia leads to......
Organ failure
Infertility
Hair loss
Tooth Decay
Irregular Heart Beat
Low Blood Pressure
DEATH
There are much more other healthier options out there, Throwing up your food is NOT the answer. It will NOT help your depression it will NOT make your problems go away. Join a Gym, Eat 3 meals a day but starving yourself will do nothing but end you up in a hospital or worse. STOP doing it
17/f . For the past year and a half i have been with my boyfriend and he did a lot of shady things such as drink at his house with a girl who gave him oral sex in the past, went out to parties and never told me until i found out from someone else and other things of that magnitude. On the 9th of february, i got really fed up with the disrespect and i never really got over the things he did to me, so i decided it was time to get my revenge and i broke up with him. I went out with my "friend" and she took me to parties with her, convinced me to hang out with guys with her and smoke weed and drink. i realized that lifestyle is not for me and i was much happier with my boyfriend because nobody can compare to him and he was so angry that i was out without him, that he changed his # and completely stopped talking to me. i had my "friend" text him and call him and try and help out the situation by telling lies that we werent really out. little did i know, she was telling him EVERYTHING that we were doing, while she was lying to me and supposedly helping me out. i confessed to us going out, but apparently she told him that i cheated on him with 3 guys when i really didnt. since she was telling the truth about everything else, he doesnt believe i was faithful to him and for the past 3 days all he has done is call me a liar and has BEGGED for me to tell him what he thinks is the truth. what do i tell him, i have done everything i can to try and get him to believe me but he wont. please HELP! i need to keep him in my life, going out wasnt even worth it.
Two wrongs don't make it right
He doesn't respect you, You don't respect him and frankly, I think it would be in your best interest for the both of you to move on. On his behalf: Drinking is an extremely poor excuse for cheating on someone. People are 100% in control of how much alcohol we consume and he choose to drink until it got out of hand. The guy cheated.. He wasn't faithful to you, He was not upfront about his wrong doing and sadly it took to hear it from someone else for you to find out about it.
You broke up with him, You decided that seeking revenge would make him jealous and you turned to smoking weed and drinking......again poor excuse.
Honestly? The guy changed his number that right there should give you a hint that he is no longer interested in making it work. You both don't trust one another and honesty is just not there. Sometimes it's best to suck it up and acknowledge the damage instead of trying to put broken pieces together. He wasn't faithful to you, You weren't faithful to him. Instead of seeking revenge you should of handled the situation in a more mature way by breaking up with him and keeping it at that. Someone who is about revenge obviously has some sort of insecurity issues.
He was wrong, You were wrong and damage has been done. Move on and stop playing mind games
I was raped by an ex that I still work with. Is there a way to tell someone so we can be separated but not be drug through a nasty confrontation with any of the people over me? I can't work with how it is now. I just want to be away from him, not have to tell everybody what happend.
You got to tell someone. A parent, A friend or even the police. You even have the right to talk to your boss in private...
You must let someone know, NEVER let someone get away with something like that. This guy is wrong and needs to be reported PLEASE!!!!!!
Why don't people realize this? Hear me out, to get the full scope of what I'm talking about. I can tell if you responded without actually reading what I wrote. I'm genuinely interested in your response, whether it's positive or negative. I thought for some time about this.
Because it's essentially saying that even if someone was the perfect guy for you; you shared common interests, he treated you very well, you found him very attractive, etc. he wouldn't even be an option, because of his race. There's nothing racist if someone happens to only date within their race because out of the people they've met, the ones they connect the best with are within their race. But to say that you only want to date within your race is racist, even if you have friends outside of your race, because it implies that even if you happened to connect with someone very well, you wouldn't think they're good enough for marriage, for a very shallow reason. And just because you haven't met someone outside of your race that you could really connect with doesn't mean that it could never happen.
It's racist to want to stay within your race to "make sure your kids look almost exactly like you" as it is to want to date outside of your race, to "make sure your kids look different from you". they're both just as racist, and superficial. People like this shouldn't even have kids, to pass on such stupid beliefs. If you love your daughter's blonde hair and blue eyes more than you love her personality, or the fact that she's your daughter and shares half your DNA, you have issues.
The whole "preserving bloodlines" thing is complete bull, too. There's no such thing as a "pure" race, as it's been scientifically proven that race doesn't even exist at all; it's just a social concept. It's a faulty social concept, because when you trace people's DNA, it spreads across various continents. And if people truly believed in the "one drop rule" then everyone in the world would be considered black, as humans are originally from Africa. we have different skin colors because of the different amounts of melanin in our skin; a very insignificant part of our DNA as a whole. racism was just created to give white males more power; that's it. for example, it was easy to justify enslaving blacks when you saw them as less than human, as someone of another "race". By the way, by saying this, I'm not saying that I have a grudge on all whites, or whatever. Nor am I saying that all whites were like that back then. I'm just saying historical truths.
It really boggles my mind why race is still an issue in society, especially American society. I understand why someone might be wary to date someone out of their culture, but race and culture are not always synonymous. Also, it's hypocritical for someone to use that to try and justify not dating outside of their race, and yet they may date a white person from Sweden, even though they are from Brazil, or they may date a black person from the Caribbean, even though they are from Australia. You may have grew up together in school with someone of a different race, but you're more likely have more in common with someone from another continent, because you're the same skin color! Am I the only one who sees how silly this is?
It's sad that interracial couples are often treated with disdain, in our society. They're no different from same-race couples, to be honest (granted they became a couple for non-superficial reasons). It just doesn't make any logical sense to me. people shouldn't feel ashamed or w/e, because they're doing nothing wrong
personally, I'm a black girl, but I've been attracted to various guys, of various ethnic backgrounds. I have no preference of the type of guy I marry, as long as he's good looking, we have similar interests and lifestyles, and we connect very well. isn't that how it's supposed to be?Because it's essentially saying that even if someone was the perfect guy for you; you shared common interests, he treated you very well, you found him very attractive, etc. he wouldn't even be an option, because of his race. There's nothing racist if someone happens to only date within their race because out of the people they've met, the ones they connect the best with are within their race. But to say that you only want to date within your race is racist, even if you have friends outside of your race, because it implies that even if you happened to connect with someone very well, you wouldn't think they're good enough for marriage, for a very shallow reason. And just because you haven't met someone outside of your race that you could really connect with doesn't mean that it could never happen.
It's racist to want to stay within your race to "make sure your kids look almost exactly like you" as it is to want to date outside of your race, to "make sure your kids look different from you". they're both just as racist, and superficial. People like this shouldn't even have kids, to pass on such stupid beliefs. If you love your daughter's blonde hair and blue eyes more than you love her personality, or the fact that she's your daughter and shares half your DNA, you have issues.
The whole "preserving bloodlines" thing is complete bull, too. There's no such thing as a "pure" race, as it's been scientifically proven that race doesn't even exist at all; it's just a social concept. It's a faulty social concept, because when you trace people's DNA, it spreads across various continents. And if people truly believed in the "one drop rule" then everyone in the world would be considered black, as humans are originally from Africa. we have different skin colors because of the different amounts of melanin in our skin; a very insignificant part of our DNA as a whole. racism was just created to give white males more power; that's it. for example, it was easy to justify enslaving blacks when you saw them as less than human, as someone of another "race". By the way, by saying this, I'm not saying that I have a grudge on all whites, or whatever. Nor am I saying that all whites were like that back then. I'm just saying historical truths.
It really boggles my mind why race is still an issue in society, especially American society. I understand why someone might be wary to date someone out of their culture, but race and culture are not always synonymous. Also, it's hypocritical for someone to use that to try and justify not dating outside of their race, and yet they may date a white person from Sweden, even though they are from Brazil, or they may date a black person from the Caribbean, even though they are from Australia. You may have grew up together in school with someone of a different race, but you're more likely have more in common with someone from another continent, because you're the same skin color! Am I the only one who sees how silly this is?
It's sad that interracial couples are often treated with disdain, in our society. They're no different from same-race couples, to be honest (granted they became a couple for non-superficial reasons). It just doesn't make any logical sense to me. people shouldn't feel ashamed or w/e, because they're doing nothing wrong
personally, I'm a black girl, but I've been attracted to various guys, of various ethnic backgrounds. I have no preference of the type of guy I marry, as long as he's good looking, we have similar interests and lifestyles, and we connect very well. isn't that how it's supposed to be?
I am be considered an arrogant ass in your eyes just giving you the heads up...
I have no problem with different races but I prefer to date someone who is white as I am, Why? because that is just what I am more comfortable with.
I find certain races to be a little more obnoxious, rude, disrespectful and down ride degrading at times. I've had many African friends in my life and as a matter of fact a few years back my best friend was African American until she moved away of course.. I see different races as friend material that's about it.
It's an old tradition that the Chinese families would generally prefer their children to date a Chinese man or woman. I don't believe it is a raciest thing, I believe it's more of a traditional way of life. However, Lately that seems to be changing.
In today's society I'm actually going to have to say I've seen a lot more mixed couples dating/marrying. I actually read an article not too long ago on yahoo about how now most couples are actually different races and come from different cultures.
Does it make me a bad person for wanting to stick with white? No, I don't think so. I wouldn't call myself a racist because I don't go around disrespecting others because of their race or skin colors. I still have just as much respect for them as I do others. I just again, Prefer to date someone I am more comfortable dating.
Everyone is different, I would never judge an African person for wanting to date their own kind nor would I a Chinese or any other race. It's a personal choice that people have the right to call.
My guy friend is getting a lot more touchy feely and flirty lately, this week he grabbed my thigh, and pokes my butt with his binder, and tickles me a lot, and today he kept trying to put his hands up my shirt, on my stomache to "warm his hands up" and did it more at our locker trying to tickle me. then when we hugged goodbye after school he put his hands up my shirt again. Why could this be?
thanks.
i'm 17 btw.
The guy could like you but it sounds to me that he may like you for only one thing. Also, "Poking you in the butt with a binder?" wth? That is by far the most immature thing I've heard in awhile. Instead of letting someone touch you like that tell him "No" and be stern about it. Like Adviceman said below me it sounds like you are not ready nor comfortable with his behavior and I'm not going to lie.....He sounds very immature. Remember, Boys think inside their pants not always with their heads. :/
So I have asthma (exercised induced) but I also just got over the flu. And now my allergies are coming in. The flu left behind a nasty cough that gets worse everyday, I really don't like it. Everytime I breathe in all the way there is this weird noise that doesn't sound like wheezing. It is a deep rumble that I can feel when it happens, a wheeze is high pitched. What is this? How can I keep my breathing regular? Right now I have to shorten my breaths because if I breathe in any deeper, I will cough. :( Thanks! :D
Sometimes getting over the flu can take weeks, Sounds to me that you still have somewhat of a congestion in your lungs. I'm not a doctor I really can't give you a diagnosis. Wheezing is common with people with asthma to reduce the chances of having an asthma attack or wheezing uncontrollably give your body a bit more time to recover from the flu. Restrict yourself from any heavy activity for awhile and get plenty of sleep. If the wheezing is becoming an ongoing problem then I would see the doctor.
16/Female
So I thought i fell for my bestfriend about a month ago and now im not sure whats happening. We are basically in a relationship, (we hang out a lot, kiss, cuddle) and its been fine, we are both happy. since we have became more than friends he has changed. he isnt fun and doesnt joke around anymore, he has become really quiet. im confused because i thought i liked him but im never excited to see him or talk to him. i want to kiss him but when we do its nothing special. i know its normal for some people not to get butterflies in their stomach when they are around people they like, but the other two guys i liked before always gave me butterflies and i was always so happy to be around them...can someone please tell me if its normal to like someone and feel this way or if i just dont like him like i thought i did?
Sometimes dating a friend can be complicated
It's either it turns out great and being friends before hand was the best thing you could of done. Or you two are just meant to be friends and only friends.
1, Sometimes dating a friend can end up ruining your friendship
2, Sometimes it's the best thing in the world
You two were friends before you dated, You are already used to one another. The excitement of dating someone is in the beginning generally people don't know enough about one another and therefore the spark is there that creates excitement. You and your boyfriend are already past that stage, You know one another.
Now that could be the issue, The other thing is maybe you both realize that you aren't as attracted to one another as you originally thought you were. This could also be another possibility which sounds to me like maybe you two are better off being friends. :/
everyday at school EVERYTHING sounds wrong! now that i know more about sex and all that scary gross stuff everyone and even me sees everything wrong! thanks to pervs everywhere i can no longer eat a banana, suck a lollipop, in volleyball say grab a ball! and so much more. people are just perverts these days !
Some people are immature about things, They think everything is funny. Unfortunately there are very little people who are mature about the subject. Be thankful you are one of them. Let everyone else make a fool of themselves.
So I met this guy at a party and we chatted for 30 minutes. We had a lot in common and he really seemed to be interested in me. I had to leave so he gave me his number and told me to text or call him up so we could hang out. Two days later I text him, and texts back saying: whats up? How are you? I answered back and he never replied after that. I texted him today (4 days later) saying hey whats up? He hasnt replied. Should I give up?
You chatted for 30 minutes, Do you know him?
Assuming you don't, This man could be involved with someone. Really, Parties aren't always the best places to met people in my personal opinion. People are drinking, Some are drunk and you just never know. If the guy hasn't replied back after 4 days then I would just sort of assume the guy isn't interested or he has someone else.
Can you get pregnant if you are a virgin, but you touch a condom which has sperm in it, then go to the toilet and wipe, can the sperm spread? And can you get pregnant by this if you are a virgin?
Impossible, Why would you even think about doing something like? Are you looking to get pregnant?... By even saying something that like you are nowhere ready to be raising babies anyway.