how do i get him to believe me? I lied to him, and I even lied about lying... now he won't BELIEVE ME! How do I fix this?
Question Posted Saturday February 25 2012, 1:33 pm
17/f . For the past year and a half i have been with my boyfriend and he did a lot of shady things such as drink at his house with a girl who gave him oral sex in the past, went out to parties and never told me until i found out from someone else and other things of that magnitude. On the 9th of february, i got really fed up with the disrespect and i never really got over the things he did to me, so i decided it was time to get my revenge and i broke up with him. I went out with my "friend" and she took me to parties with her, convinced me to hang out with guys with her and smoke weed and drink. i realized that lifestyle is not for me and i was much happier with my boyfriend because nobody can compare to him and he was so angry that i was out without him, that he changed his # and completely stopped talking to me. i had my "friend" text him and call him and try and help out the situation by telling lies that we werent really out. little did i know, she was telling him EVERYTHING that we were doing, while she was lying to me and supposedly helping me out. i confessed to us going out, but apparently she told him that i cheated on him with 3 guys when i really didnt. since she was telling the truth about everything else, he doesnt believe i was faithful to him and for the past 3 days all he has done is call me a liar and has BEGGED for me to tell him what he thinks is the truth. what do i tell him, i have done everything i can to try and get him to believe me but he wont. please HELP! i need to keep him in my life, going out wasnt even worth it.
He doesn't respect you, You don't respect him and frankly, I think it would be in your best interest for the both of you to move on. On his behalf: Drinking is an extremely poor excuse for cheating on someone. People are 100% in control of how much alcohol we consume and he choose to drink until it got out of hand. The guy cheated.. He wasn't faithful to you, He was not upfront about his wrong doing and sadly it took to hear it from someone else for you to find out about it.
You broke up with him, You decided that seeking revenge would make him jealous and you turned to smoking weed and drinking......again poor excuse.
Honestly? The guy changed his number that right there should give you a hint that he is no longer interested in making it work. You both don't trust one another and honesty is just not there. Sometimes it's best to suck it up and acknowledge the damage instead of trying to put broken pieces together. He wasn't faithful to you, You weren't faithful to him. Instead of seeking revenge you should of handled the situation in a more mature way by breaking up with him and keeping it at that. Someone who is about revenge obviously has some sort of insecurity issues.
Jennefer answered Saturday February 25 2012, 9:57 pm: I think the best you can do is forget about him. He odviously doesn't respect you and you said it bothered you that he acted this way, so why would you go back with a guy who treats you this way. I say let him believe whatever he want to believe, you know you didn't cheat on him and thats all that matters. And as for your friend she is obiously a bad friend because she went against you that way. So my advice is to forget them both and meet someone that treats you the right way and a friend that will help you not harm you. I hope I helped.
~Jani~ [ Jennefer's advice column | Ask Jennefer A Question ]
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