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I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
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advice
well over the summer ive lost 30 pounds i usually get my period on the 14th of the month and its now the 21st! can losing weight make your period irregular?
Never expect your period to be as regular as to fall on the exact same day every month. I don't think losing weight had anything to do with it. Sometimes your period will just come on a different day. You can even skip one entirely without there being a problem. Very few women have regular periods. Don't worry unless you start getting it every two weeks or if you miss it twice. So relax, nothing's wrong. Congrats on losing the weight, though, that's really great. :)
okay, so im on my schools soccer team and even though our season is almost half way done, i still want help.
so basically, at the beginning of every practice we have to run a mile and im always one of the last people in and im dead tired. i want to be a better runner, and overall, FASTER because i need to be able to sprint really fast too. what all should i do that would help me be a better runner??
15/f if it helps...?
I used to be slow too. Then in a year I was one of the fastest kids on the soccer team. How did I do it? I ran track. I joined the track team in the spring on a whim and it turned out being a really good decision. Not only did track help me become a better runner, I learned how to pace myself and set up a good running schedule for myself for other times of the year. Even if you do it for only a year, there's a lot you can learn and you'll be a much better runner. Good luck! :)
okay i always get confused what is friends with benefits? everyone is always like i rather just be friends with benefits with him. im like oh but i have no idea what she's talking about. please help
-aberfitchyy-
It's being able to have the benefits of intimate contact with a person and not have to support them emotionally. In a friends with benefits relationship you can kiss, touch each other, and stuff like that, but you don't talk or hang out any more than regular friends. You don't go on dates or buy each other things. It's actually a very unhealthy kind of relationship. Usually one of the partners wants more, but the other won't give it to them. The intimacy causes them to become even more attached and believe that someday a real relationship will happen when it never will. Friends with benefits is very bad. If your friends are serious about that and are not being sarcastic or joking, they are either very cruel or very naive, confused people. If they ever mean to do that, try to talk them out of it. I hope I made sense. Good luck. :)
I am in love with this guy. And he feels the same toward me. However, he is better than me in every way. He's smarter, better-looking, and so on. This makes me feel inferior and insecure. I feel I'm not worthy of his love. I feel extremely small when I'm with him. I wish I could be as intelligent as him in order to be more worthy of his love. I hate myself. I hate my shortcomings. My biggest fear is that he would abandon me because of the fact I'm not as great as him. As a genius, he has every reason to despise me. He outshines me in every area. Whenever I detect a tiny sign that he might ignore/hate me, I feel like dying. Because of these, I'm not myself when I'm with this guy. I care TOO much about how he thinks of me. I appear very nervous, hypersensitive, and stupid. And this makes things worse. I am over-conscious about every word I say to him. I fear something I say would sound silly according to him and that he would despise me. I feel I'm just a silly little girl in his eyes. I know in fact he loves me. But I can never enjoy his love because of my feeling of inadequacy. I feel I need to be a much, much better person to deserve his love. I always try to be smarter so as to be "equal" to him, yet only end up making a fool of myself. This drives me crazy. What can I do now?
Tell him everything that you are feeling. He can help you get through this. He will probably tell you all the things he thinks are wonderful about you. Keep in mind too, that most people like their partners to be confident. If he gets rid of you, it's not going to be because of your inadequecies. It's going to be because you aren't confident about yourself. In order to love another, you have to learn how to love yourself first. He really can help you get through this. I felt very similarly a few years ago. I talked to my bf about it. He helped a lot and now we are engaged. Good luck. :)
I've heard people talking about what happens before God returns. I've started reading the bible, but I haven't gotten that far where it tells you about it. I know that it says something about locusts and maybe hurricanes, but I don't know the details. If any of you have read it, what does it say happens?
BitsAndPieces answer is very good. I'd like to add that there is a series of novels called "Left Behind" that goes through what those times might be like. It's not fact, but it gives a very good rendition about what those times might be like. There's also a kids series that's very good too. That's actually the one I read. :)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Left_Behind_%28series%29
i dated my ex for 2 years.
he broke up with me around 2 months ago.
during the day i feel good about myself, like i can get over him, but one the night time comes around, i cry, alot. he still kisses me and holds me and stuff, but he talks to these 2 girls that don't like me, and they always talk a lot about me, and seeing him flirting w/ them and stuff hurts me alot. so i have 2 questions
1) how can i make nights any easier for me? i'm so sick of feeling sorry for myself.
2) how can i just ignore who he talks to. i try so hard not to, but i can't help it.
It's going to hurt for awhile. Only time can heal this type of thing. However, you're not making it any easier on yourself by continuing to be intimate with him. You're not in a relationship with him anymore. No matter how much you still like him, he broke up with you. He doesn't deserve your kisses or your hugs. If he likes you, wants you, or needs you that badly he shouldn't have broken up with you. Stop kissing him, stop holding him, and stop whatever other intimate things you are doing with him. Not only does he not deserve them, the fact that you are doing that is making it very hard for you to get over him. It's going to take such a long time if you keep doing it. Every kiss is going to make you love him again. Every kiss is only contributing to his sexual pleasure. I mean, hey, why should he go out with you? He can be with other girls and STILL get some from you. Don't give it to him! It will help build up your confidence to be without him if you do. Seriously, ditch this jerk! He just keeps causing you more and more pain. Good luck.
TOTAL MIXED SIGNALS!
my crush and I, we IM:ed earlier today..
and he went "you're so perfect for me, we like the same movies, songs, everything" and i was soooo happy because of that, but i had to go offline, so i said bye, but then i realized id rather talk to him than do anything else.. so i went online again, and he blocked me! my friend said he was still online, but he "went offline" as soon as i logged in.. WHYY? i cant ask him about this, so do i just NOT talk to him until he talks to me? or what?
Think about this for a minute. Pretend it happened the other way around. You get up the courage to tell him that he is perfect for you. You are so nervous and have all these expectations about how he will react. Right after you tell him that he is perfect for you, he tells you he has to go and signs offline. You'd probably be crushed. You'd think all kinds of things. You'd be convinced that he didn't like you and was just trying to be nice.
He definitely misinterpreted the signals that you sent to him. He's not sending you mixed signals. He's just very disappointed that he didn't get the reaction from you that he was looking for. The next chance you get to talk to him, tell him that you realized that he may have gotten the wrong idea about the way you felt about him. You signed offline because you really did have something to do and were really upset that he blocked you and you couldn't talk to him when you came back on. Explain everything. Then it would be a good idea to tell him how you feel about him. It's a great opportunity to start a relationship. Good luck. :)
I want to go to a college in a different state, but the tuition is so incredibly high because I'm not a resident of the state. (the state is California). How do I become a resident of the state, and how long will it take?
Thank you!
It takes a year. It's not so simple as just living there for a year though. You have to change your permanant address to one in California. A girl in my high school did that and it worked out great for her. I'm not sure of all the details and the rules may have changed, so I would talk to someone from the college that you want to go to about it. If you're not sure which college yet, just contact a random one. They will want you to go to their college so they should be more than happy to help you out. They would probably know something about it at a post office too. Don't trust what people say on this site, find the information out for yourself. You would want to make sure that it's going to work. Good luck. :)
I recently got my braces removed and now I have this lovely retainer (top and bottom). I was wondering... is there any way I can inadvertently mess anything up? As far as I can tell, the retainers just snap right in, so it's really not possible to put them in wrong, is it?
Also... the bottom retainer has a crazy plastic piece similar to my front teeth. But when I bite down, the plastic piece gets pushed down, exposing quite a bit of the top of my bottom front teeth. Does this matter at all? Or even make sense to anybody.
I'm probably just being paranoid, but reassurance is good. Thanks!
They sound perfectly fine to me. I'm sure your Orthodontist checked them to make sure. Just as long as you wear them as much as your Orthodontist says you should, you'll have no problems. When I had retainers I lost one once. It took a week or so to get back to my Orthodontist and get a new one made and by that time my teeth had moved back a bit. They didn't have the old mold so they couldn't make a retainer the same as the one I had lost. My teeth are not as good as they could have been. This was my fault for not going back right away. I'm telling you this story because I didn't realize the importance of wearing my retainers and I want you to. Sometimes just 2 days can make a huge difference. Good luck. :)
i just gave my boyfriend head yesterday for the 2nd time and now my throat is really sore.
is this something i should worry about or am i just paranoid?
I don't think it's anything to worry about. You are probably trying to fit too much into your mouth and are hitting the back of your throat. It'll feel better in a few days. Try not to fit so much in just yet. You should get better at it, though. Take it slow for now and over time you should be able to do more and more. Good luck. :)
i heard that if a condom was used properly it would work like 98 per cent...i'd just dont know how to use the condom properly since iam goin to have sex wiz my girl next week...so can give me some tips perhaps a site where i can see a visual scene to show me how to use properly coz i am afraid of gettin broken and my girl get pregnant.
tanx for help
justin R5''
http://www.coolnurse.com/malecondom.htm
There are very detailed instructions in the box you buy them in too.
Im 17 and my sister is 13. Since last year she has had alot of problems dealing with her weight and losing friends. She gets picked on at school but she never does anything about it like tell the guidance counselour the boy(s) names. But she does tell the guidance counselour that boy(s) are picking on her. Last year she told the guidance Counselour she was going to kill herself so the counselour called my parents and they brought her to the hospital. Ver since that day my family can't say anything to her. She doesnt really go any where she just sits her ass in front of the computer all day. If you ask her to clean she gets mad at you. if you ask her if she wants to go to the store with you she says no. You tell her you need to use the computer she tells you to go to the library and use theirs. You ask her to go outside with her brother so he can play she tells you to do it yourself. Now all of this sounds stupid but these simple things cause her to flip out and hate us. She recently has started cutting. I have never known anyone that has cut. My sister is proud of cutting. She post away messages about cutting. Who can be proud of this? And she does it because she gets made at us for asking and telling her to do these simple things.
Now my stepdad told me if she didnt feel ike cleaning that i have to do the chores for her because she will hurt herself. Now i know this sounds rude but shes gotten to the point where i think shes doing it for ATTENTION and its driving me nuts. Her daily schedule consist of 1. wake up 2. get on the computer 3. get dressed 4. go to school 5. coming home from school 6. do homework 7. get on the computer till 11pm 8. go to bed(this happens every single day) And if you dont realize this but nothing she does is cleaning or spending time with the family.
She is starting to see a therapist or someone starting this thursday and hope fully this person can help her out.
Sorry if i sound like a mean sister but shes driving me crazy by not helping out. I work and i really cant come home and do all the cleaning at home.
thank you.
It sounds like she is very bitter about what happened. I don't know what she is thinking, but maybe she feels like she was betrayed by her counselor. Another possibility is that she is living up to the expectations other people have of her. By bringing her to the hospital because of an idle threat of taking her own life, your parents made her feel like they thought she would really do it. Maybe she feels like they overreacted a bit by bringing her straight to the hospital. So, to spite them she is now doing this.
Your sister is going to get the help she needs, don't worry about that. All the time I was reading your question I kept saying to myself "get her to a counselor or therpist!" and then at the very end you said that she was going to start on Thursday. That is exactly what she needs. Don't expect a complete turnaround right away, but, in time, this should help her immensely.
It doesn't sound like your parents are very good at dealing with this type of situation. I'm going to suggest that your parents (and possibly you too) get involved in something. A support group, or some counseling in how to deal with your sister better. If all of you seek help too, it will show your sister that her family cares about her and her problems, which could be what she is looking for. It will also make it so that your parents can feel more confident in talking with her and making her do chores and spend time with the family. Ok, now don't go up to your parents and tell them they're doing a bad job. They're not. They're actually doing quite well and I think that they care a lot about their kids. Somehow though, suggest to them that maybe you all should go to some type of counseling so that you can help your sister too, not just her own therapist.
Another thing I would suggest is that you have a talk with her therapist sometime. It may already be part of the procedure. Tell him/her all your fears and concerns about your sister. This will help the therapy because the therapist can use some of what you say to help your sister, and it will probably help you feel better about it too.
It may also be a good idea to express your fears to your sister too. This could open some doors. Even if she doesn't take it well, she will probably be surprised that you'd share things like that with her and that you were as concerned about her as you are. It should make her feel better about herself. Right now, she probably doesn't feel like anybody cares about her because there aren't open lines of communication. Let her know how much you do.
Even if you can't get your parents to seek help as well, your sister should still be just fine, try not to worry just yet. She is getting the help she needs. :)
Ever since school started I have lost weight drastically. I lose weight very easily especially when I'm stressed out. I need to gain this weight back. I eat and eat and still don't gain a pound. what do I need to eat to gain my weight back. I'm around 5 feet and I want to weigh around 100 pounds. I'm around 91-93 pounds right now.
First, find out if you are an appropriate weight for your size at this website.
http://www.bariatricedge.com/dtcf/pages/bmi_calculator.htm?SOURCE=GOOG&KEYWORD=p
If you find that you are underweight, talk to your doctor about it. A doctor will be able to give you an effective diet and anything else you might need to gain weight.
If you find that you aren't underweight, gaining weight on purpose isn't a good idea. A doctor isn't going to tell you how to do it correctly and any ways you come up with to do it yourself are going to be extremely unhealthy and probably won't work at all.
Good luck. :)
I am very sad!!
Last night my bf asked me if I think that I was ready for marriage ..I was surprise and happy of course .He just pop up with the question if I love him and if I want to marry him one day .
I said yes ...I was really happy.
After that we kept on talking about marriage and stuff than I told him that If I ought to marry him I want to keep my own lastname ....He got really mad and told me that he doesn't like my desicion.
The real reason why I wouldn't like his lastname is that his parents has the same last name and they really hate me and do really bad and nasty stuff to me .THEY HURT ME A LOT,
It's really hard for me to go around with the lastname of my biggest enemies
I love my bf ..we had been A LOT to be togheter ..his parents did the imposible things to seperate us ..They are really jealous about their son.
The second reason is that my dad has more than 5 childrens and he only gave me his lastname ..I'm proud to have this lastname and I really don't want to change it..
Can anyone understand me ?????
I don't want to hurt him but how to explain to him this strange feeling ?
I'm really sad ..
Before explaining things to him, consider using both last names. I know some women that have kept their original last name AND taken a new one. For example, if your first name is Jessica, your middle name is Lynn, your last name is Smith and you are marrying someone whose last name is Spencer, your name would be Jessica Lynn Smith Spencer. Most of the time you'd probably leave your middle name out because that can get a little long. Doing this would honor your father, make your in-laws cringe, and honor, respect, and make your boyfriend very happy.
Marriage requires a lot of giving and compromising. Don't sacrifice who you are completely, but marriage is, in a way, a sacrifice. You aren't an "I" anymore. You're a "we". You need to think in terms of "we". It's not always what's going to be best for you anymore. Think about your boyfriend's feelings for a minute. How would you feel if you were him? Please explain everything to him, like you did here. The man you plan to marry certainly deserves every bit of the truth. He should understand and he may even say that it's ok for you not to take his name.
Even if he does say it's ok, he probably still feels bad about it. It doesn't convey a positive image to others about your relationship. It makes you seem like you want to be independant and that you don't feel you need him. I know this may seem a little unfair to you. The thing is, people are judgemental, cruel, and ignorant. Sure you could dress gothic and not be gothic, but why would you? It's kind of the same thing. He may understand, you may understand, but very few other people will. I really think that you should use both last names. It seems very appropriate for you and your situation. It would be a step in a very positive direction for you. His family is a part of him. In order to fully accept him you have to accept his family. You don't have to like them, but if you marry him, they are going to be your family too, whether you take their name or not. Good luck! :)
Whenever me and my boyfriend have sex i dont feel anything.. like no pleasure or anything..
and no matter what we do nothing seems to work.. whats wrong with me? :S
Many women aren't sexually stimulated by plain sexual intercourse. My advice would be for you to experiment with yourself a bit and find what's called your clitoris. Figure out what feels good and let your boyfriend know. While you are having sex, include your clitoris. That should solve your problem. Good luck and make sure that you use a condom unless you are trying to get pregnant. :)
Female; 14.
Me and my boyfriend have been going out for one month, we've done everything that leads up to a kiss, but we haven't kissed yet. If were hanging out with people they`ll like tell him to kiss me. Its totally embarressing, and he`ll kiss me on the cheek or the head which is super weird.
So, I tried to kiss him on his lips, so he'd get the picture. But he didn't like lean into the kiss back, he just kept his lips the same.
What should I do?
It's very rude of your friends to tell you two to kiss each other. The next time they say something like that tell them that you're not going to do it just because they tell you to. There's no reason for you two to have to kiss for them especially if it makes you feel weird. It probably makes your boyfriend feel weird too and he'll silently praise you for being the one to stick up for yourself.
Do you really want to kiss him or do you want to do it just to please your friends? If you really do want to, just do it. Make sure you do it in private. It's always going to feel awkward the first time. I don't get where people come up with how the first kiss is so wonderful and special. However, it leads to better ones to come so it's necessary to take that step, if you're ready of course.
There's a chance that he's not ready for it yet. After you make your move, hold off kissing him more until he is the one that initiates it. By going in and just doing it, it lets him know that you want to kiss and you are very ready for it. If you let him do it the second time you'll know that he is ready too. In all probability, he doesn't think that you are ready and are waiting to show him that you are. Good luck! :)
which one cleans my teeth more efficiently, flossing before or after brushing?
Oh man. It's definitely before. I can't believe so many people have said to do it after. My dentist told me this. If you floss after you brush, residue from any food that you get out will still be in your mouth. If you do it before you brush, it loosens everything up and the brush can get the rest. Think about washing a table. Do you scrub the small stuff off first leaving the big stuff for last, or do you quickly wipe the big stuff away before scrubbing? Ask your dentist about this the next time you go. Then you'll know what the answer is for sure. Good luck. :)
I'm a teenage girl. I'm single, and a virgin. (and sick of it) For the past five years of my life I have wanted to commit suicide because I have recently discovered that there is no point in living.
I'm very overweight and I'm ugly. The one boy who has ever loved me was a liar and he had a mental problem. (not being sarcastic) I have no friends and I really want to die. I've been working as a stage actress for a while but I realized I have no talent at all.
My point is: No one loves me and no one ever will. I can't live any longer without being loved. What should I do? How can I survive without love?
Everyone treats me like I'm seven years old. I look a lot older than my age and most people ask me if I'm in college. I hate my life so much. Oh, and I do masturbate regularly so don't say that I should try that. It's not a substitute for a partner or for real love. Also: all of my peers have boyfriends. So I'm the only one who's single and a loner.
By the way, no one ever listens to me when I talk so that's another reason why I want to kill myself.
Please give me advice.
It's such a good thing that you are seeking some sort of help. If your parents won't get you anti-depressants, see if you can get them yourself. Call your doctor and explain everything. Your doctor may be able to give them to you (I'm not sure he/she can without parental permission). Even if your doctor can't do that, he/she can probably convince your parents of the severity of the situation so they will allow it themselves. If none of this works, actually go to a health center or emergency room and see what you can get from that.
Keep in mind that not having a boyfriend as a teen doesn't mean you never will. I didn't get my first boyfriend until I was almost 19. I was engaged to him after a little more than a year and we're still together. I am still a virgin. He wants to wait until marriage for sex, which I also view as a very positive thing. I see all the people that I was so jealous of in high school and they are single now. They're so unhappy. High school was their time and now that high school is over, their time is over. My time is just beginning. I can't believe that I ever wished that I could have any part of their lives. It's crazy. If you don't give up on it, happiness will come.
Not only should you call your doctor, but you should also call a suicide hotline. The people there can help you a lot more than most people on this website. It's free too, so it's at least worth a try.
Suicide & Crisis Hotline
1-800-999-9999
Suicide Hotline - (National Adolescent)
800-621-4000
Good luck. :)
how long do you have to wait to take the pregnancy test for it to work after you have sex? how lnog?
Two weeks. You can't completely trust a home pregnancy test though. The results you get could be wrong. They are not 100% accurate.
ahhh! ok i am such a bad person!
i've been in love with the same guy for 2 years, and all along ive been trying to hack his email account to see if he has any emails from his gf's or about me or whatever! (i know! wrong wrong wronggg!) but here's the thing, his secret question was "favorite historical person" and ive been trying to guess it or years, guessing eveything from spongebob square pants to eleanor roosevelt, and then while doing my daily "try-to-hack-him" thing, i decided to google "favorite historcal person" and the first thing that came up was "Jesus" and im a christian (who sins a lot, even though i try not to..) but he's not, so i was like "pssh he doesnt have that as an answer, and if he does I WILL NOT HACK HIM" and guess what? i tried it - and it worked! and i wont to go in and read his emails so bad! but i did say i wouldnt do it if his answer was Jesus! I don't know WHY i did it, but i guess i feel it would be wrong doing something WROOONG using Christ's name.. so help me! i will not let go of it and just forget it! i will think about it every day, every imnute until i do it! ive considered sending him a anonymous email saying "change your secret question" so if im tempted i still cant do it.. but i want to! so badly! HELP PLEASE! maybe if you could help me find bible verses that can help in situations like these when you'r etempted to do smething bad? and just incase.. (incase i do it, like now..as soon as ive asked the question) could you help me with ohw to ask for forgiveness and maybe make sure it doesn't happen again?
help me please!! thank you!
The internet really brings out the worst in us, huh? ;)
If the answer wasn't Jesus would you have continued trying to figure out what it was? By your question, it seems like you would have. If you really did consider what you were doing as wrong, you wouldn't have said well "if" it's Jesus I'll stop and "if" it's not then I won't. You should have decided not to continue at all. So, all that said, this isn't a moral decision now, it was always a moral decision. You already made the mistake of doing something wrong. It's not wrong now that Jesus has come up. It was wrong from the start. The Jesus thing just helped you realize that.
A lot of people in your position would have done the same thing. I'm not going to sit here and say that I've never tried to hack into someone else's e-mail account. It's actually kind of fun. Try not to overthink sins and religion. Everybody sins. You're not going to and should not expect to live your life without sinning. We're not judged by God by how many sins we commit or why we commit them. We're not even judged by whether we can ask for forgiveness or not. All we are judged by is whether or not we believe in Jesus. I'm not saying that this means you should, or are warranted in being a bad person. You'll live a very unhappy life if you are. There will be a lot of pain and guilt. Trying to please God, letting Him help you with your problems, and asking Him to forgive you for your sins will make you a happier person. Sinning usually feels good at the time, but afterwards it never does. Nowhere though, does it say that you can't sin and that if you do, you're going to hell.
Now, back to your actual issue. Is hacking in wrong? Yes. Should you do it? Of course not. What are you going to get out of it if you do? Probably just sadness. You're going to be reading a bunch of e-mails about how he loves somebody else. Do you really think he's going to e-mail someone and talk about you? Not very likely is it? Things that he says to you that may make it seem that he likes you are probably just perceived that way because you like him and you're looking for them. Hoping and wishing doesn't make anything happen. Trust me, I've looked at other people's e-mails and it usually just upsets me and makes me feel very guilty.
My advice would be to send him the anonymous e-mail telling him to change his question. That will take away the temptation and will probably make you feel very good even if you are a little disappointed. You can find so much more out by talking to him. You can't tell how someone really feels by reading something they wrote. It's hard to detect sarcasm or lies in an e-mail. That's just my advice though. Look at the answers given to you on this site for guidance, but also ask someone that can really help you with this: God. Good luck. :)