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I Feel Unworthy of His Love
I am in love with this guy. And he feels the same toward me. However, he is better than me in every way. He's smarter, better-looking, and so on. This makes me feel inferior and insecure. I feel I'm not worthy of his love. I feel extremely small when I'm with him. I wish I could be as intelligent as him in order to be more worthy of his love. I hate myself. I hate my shortcomings. My biggest fear is that he would abandon me because of the fact I'm not as great as him. As a genius, he has every reason to despise me. He outshines me in every area. Whenever I detect a tiny sign that he might ignore/hate me, I feel like dying. Because of these, I'm not myself when I'm with this guy. I care TOO much about how he thinks of me. I appear very nervous, hypersensitive, and stupid. And this makes things worse. I am over-conscious about every word I say to him. I fear something I say would sound silly according to him and that he would despise me. I feel I'm just a silly little girl in his eyes. I know in fact he loves me. But I can never enjoy his love because of my feeling of inadequacy. I feel I need to be a much, much better person to deserve his love. I always try to be smarter so as to be "equal" to him, yet only end up making a fool of myself. This drives me crazy. What can I do now?
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Um, well no one can make you feel inferior without your permission, so just try to act normal. good luck =)
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he loves you for who you are. you don't have to pretend to be anybody else, or try to be equal when you're around him because i don't think he cares if you two are equal or not. and honestly, i think you're selling yourself short. he may be better at some things than you, but that doesn't mean that you should feel inferior to him. and think about it: what if he's thinking the exact same thing? what if he's thinking, "she thinks i'm a brainiac and a supermodel, i need to be more like myself..." i mean, if he loves you as much as he says he does he won't abandon you and he won't think you're just a silly little girl. i think that you need to relax a little bit. it seems like you're a little overwhelmed, and i think you should stop trying to be as smart as you think he is, and just be what you are.
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No one is better than anyone else, we all have different qualities. This is what makes us special to each other. I would think that you have qualities that are very special to him, quite possibly one of them being your capacity for sensitivity. It is a great thing to have if used in the right way, that is to enhance your personality not to put it on auto destruct.
Don't try to be like him, it's more likely your differences that attracted him. He may be a genius but no one wants to be that all the time. You probably give him the chance to be normal and just feel loved for himself, not for what he can do.
Talk to him and let him tell you about all the great things he loves about you. Then accept them and acknowledge that you are a worthwhile person. It may be hard to start with, but little steps towards acceptance makes it easier.
Hope that helps and good luck.
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dont stress yourself
the guy likes you for who you are
i dont think you acted this way when
he first started liking you
that just proves that he likes you
for you
and you dont have to be
anybody but yourself
because if you act all different
he might stop liking you
because your not the same girl
he liked before
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Like you said he loves you right so if he really does then he wont leave you for any kind of reason just relax around him and yes i no that its not easy or simple and no you dont need to be equal to him everyone is diffrent from each other just accept that your not like him but he likes you for who you are and never think your not like him sure your not exactly but that doesnt meen your less in any way i hope i helped and good luck with this guy xx
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Tell him everything that you are feeling. He can help you get through this. He will probably tell you all the things he thinks are wonderful about you. Keep in mind too, that most people like their partners to be confident. If he gets rid of you, it's not going to be because of your inadequecies. It's going to be because you aren't confident about yourself. In order to love another, you have to learn how to love yourself first. He really can help you get through this. I felt very similarly a few years ago. I talked to my bf about it. He helped a lot and now we are engaged. Good luck. :)
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You don't have to be equal to him, cause if you were, it wouldn't make you special. It wouldn't create different opinions and thoughts which might be what he loves about you. He might want a girl whose just laid-back and everything, everything you already are. You need to stop worrying about deserving his love, because you already have it. And if he loves you like you know he does, he's not going to abandon you for any reason. If he thought you were "inadequate" to him he wouldn't have gotten together with you in the first place. Just talk to him about it and express your feelings to him. I think you need to hear it from him instead of a stranger like me. Realize how much he cares for you and loves you and that to him you're great. Whenever you find yourself thinking those thoughts, just push them out of your mind as much as you can. Let go, and have awseome times with him and enjoy him and his company and just remember that he does infact love you. And you are in one way equal to him - you're both equally in love with eachother. Haha, sorry, I probably sound sappy, don't I? But, I hope I helped.
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nothing is ever going to change if you dont stop thinking your not as good as him. if he tells you he loves you then he dose and if he didnt think you met his standards or was "equal" to him that he would be with you and tell you that he loves you
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