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I sometimes take long breaks from the site. I'm more than happy to answer anyone's questions, but just make sure they're not too time sensitive. :)Facts about me:
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advice
I'm sorry this is so long, but it's a pretty complicated situation.
Okay, so when my boyfriend and I first starting dating...there was this girl that really liked him and wanted to be with him. My boyfriend told her that he wasn't interested because he was with me and that they just needed to be friends. Well I called him one night and he was somewhere with her 'talking about it in person.' I didn't really think anything of it, and I just forgot about it. Well then he said that they didn't really talk anymore, but she was still texting him and stuff. Well one night my boyfriend and I were together and she kept calling him...still. So I started worrying about it again and I checked his text messages and apparently they had been hanging out still. He had texts from her saying 'Will you drive tonight?' blah blah. I didn't say anything about it because I was ashamed that I had looked through his text messages. Well last night I called him and she was at his house at 11 PM. I didn't overreact at first until I found out that they were in his room. I was mad because he knew I wouldn't be comfortable with that and he still let her come over.
He said that she came over at 11 PM to wish him a happy late birthday and that they were in his room because she was checking her myspace, but it turns out she doesn't even have one.
I'm especially upset because his story doesn't make sense and I know if the tables were turned, he'd be pissed off at me. I don't know what to do. I know we need to talk about it, but I need to know a calm way to do it because I'm very tempermental. What do I say?
18/f. We've only been together for 4 months.
The best way to do it is to not accuse him of anything. Don't accuse him of lying, and don't tell him what you know. Make him tell you himself. Ask him direct questions. A good first one would be "I'm not stupid, and I'm going to ask you this directly, why are you hiding your relationship with her? I know you hang out and stuff and I'm worried that because you are hiding it that there is more...is there?". "Would you ever cheat on me?" is a good way to start too. It could be that he's worried that you will get jealous of him hanging out with and being friends with her and there really isn't anything going on. Keep that in mind. It's always good to give your guy the benefit of the doubt. However, if you tread lightly, he will too, and he probably won't tell you anything. You can't give him the benefit of the doubt if you ask him a direct question and he lies. If he doesn't tell you right away, get more and more direct with him. Ask him directly if he's more than just friends with her and such. Ask him what he was doing such and such a night. It doesn't matter what tone you use, just as long as you aren't yelling, accusatory, or sarcastic. You can sound disappointed, angry, or even slightly mean. You can make it sound like you know, but avoid admitting that you do. If he doesn't offer up the information, let it go for a few days. If he still hasn't told you, tell him what you found out and see if he'll admit to it then. Any way you look at it, you're probably going to end up breaking up with him. Try to prepare ahead of time so that when it happens you don't lose your cool. I'm really sorry that this is happening to you and good luck.
so about 2 weeks ago i gave my bf a hangjob and i got cum on my finger but i wiped it off and washed it off only a lil and 40 mins later i masterbated but i got my period 4 days later. and now its after my period but i still kinda have cramps is that a sign of pregnancy?
Okay, the other columnists are correct in the fact that you shouldn't be worried, but please don't think for a second that sperm dies when it hits the air. That's ridiculous. Whoever thought that up and started spreading it around needs to be punched in the face. It can actually live anywheres from a few minutes to a few hours depending on the conditions. So, if you hadn't washed your hands, you would have risked becoming pregnant. The chances are very small, but still there. Since you got your period, there's nothing to worry about. If you are careful and safe, like you were, there's no reason to worry about pregnancy. Just be conscious of everything and don't get too caught up in the moment. :)
For some reason i somehow managed to pull a muscle or hurt something at least in my leg last night while sleeping and it hurts! Ive done it before, just not recently and im not sure how i do it. Right now my calf area still hurts even though i tried stretching it. Is there any way i can keep myself from pulling a muscle while sleeping? Is this even considered pulling a muscle or something else?
I doubt you pulled a muscle. Pulling a muscle is realllly painful. You are probably just getting muscle cramps. Cramps are usually the result of not having enough water, or not having enough salt.
The next time you see your doctor bring this up, there may be something that can be done about it. It's not an emergency, so don't worry about it too much for now unless it starts happening very frequently. In the meantime, try drinking some more water and having more salt. It doesn't matter how much extra water you drink, but don't go eating a pound of salt. Some chips or crackers as a snack would be just fine.
To make your leg feel better, first ice it, then heat it, then ice it, then heat it. If you do that for awhile it should help your muscles relax. Good luck!
I have alot of trouble remembering things that I will just read and its like if some one tells me some stuff I can easily forget. Is there a cure for this kind of thing. And its also hard for me to understand what some one is explaining sometimes.
You may have ADD or ADHD. Talk to your doctor about it and get tested. If you have it, you can get treated for it and maybe it will fix these problems. Good luck!
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Attention-deficit_disorder
I'm sure this question has been asked before. But I want to know if I can get a straight forward answer. I've googled hundreds of times, and can't seem to find an answer. When is a woman most fertile?
Before, After, or During her period?
It can very from woman to woman, but generally, it's the 13th day after the first day you get your period. So, basically, right in between periods. However, you can get pregnanat at any time during the month and shouldn't rely solely on the calendar/rhythm method to prevent pregnancy. If you are trying to get pregnant, it can come in very handy. You need to take your temperature and check cervical mucus every day for three months as well as note when you get your period to get an accurate estimation of when you ovulate. It's best done with the help of a doctor. This website has losts of information about it and a more detailed monthly fertility calendar, that will answer your question better than I can. :)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rhythm_method
hey my friend is 4'9 and she only weighs 85 pounds she eats alot and everything but she wont gain weight. this is a really big problem for her and shes been really sad about it. what are some HEALTHY ways 4 her to gain weight.
tnakyou
p.s dont say to pig out
Your friend should see a doctor or nutritionist. A professional would be able to set up a diet for her that would help her gain weight in a healthy way. Eating more foods that are high in fat is not only unhealthy, but probably won't work in helping her gain weight.
:Hey, im a m/16 virgin, Junior in High School
-i have never had a serious relationship, at all. When i was in 8th/9th grade or so i had a few "intimate" moments but nothing worth mentioning. Right now im quite lonely. betrayed by a few of my close friends (not really there fault, just time takes it toll) I tend to be a "friend" of many people. never have I once gotten sexually close or even talked about this to anyone.
At this point I am deperate for a sincere relationship. I am the type of person that would ask a girl out, as long as it was a 50% chance or higher I would get a "yes". But at this point I am pretty sure that not one girl would even consider me.
I'm not amazingly attractive, nor do I have the IQ of a genious. But I'm kind, smart, and caring.
I tend to question alot about life, and If a girl or friend in general cant hold there own ground, I may just lose that person from my life because I'm to damn annoying.
What should I do? I know alot of people as "friends". Not one would consider even going on a few dates with me to get to know me. I am a bit lonely and I feel that if I dont find someone soon, to at least raise me up a little higher, I might become depressed, or extremly lonely.
Since I'm a Junior I have a little more pressure/respect for my decision and I can justify what I do/am (Single/Not -Single)
How can i get what i want, a serious relationship with a great girl that will understand me. and someone who i can take an intrest in and help too (Im not selfish ^_^)
any advice at all would be great!
Look forward to college. My guess is that you've been in the same town with most of the same people for most of your life. Once you get to college, you'll meet a ton of new people. They will all be close to your age and there will be more that share your particular interests, characteristics, and maturity level. I didn't have my first relationship until my first year of college when I was 18 and a half. I couldn't be happier that I waited. It sucks not having someone, but someday you'll look back and be so happy that you didn't have to go through all the crap that most other people had to in high school. Good luck and try looking at the positive side. :)
i have sorta bad acne on my forhead and what not i use proactive, some morning burst stuff, and another face wash but its not really working is there anything thats gunna work really really well ??
You're going to have to get a perscription for anything that's going to work really well. Don't let that discourage you though. You can get one very easily from a Dermatologist (skin doctor). I had moderate acne and my aunt convinced me to see a Dermatologist. The cream he perscribed wiped my acne completely away in 2 days. I was very surprised and happy. It's really worth the visit. The appointment takes less than a half hour. Good luck! :)
soo like when i masturbate right... it starts feelin reallyy good and then my whole body tenses up and sometimes feels like my legs and stuff are trembling, then when i stop im pretty much numb. is that an orgasm?
It could be. I can't tell you for sure, but I would say so. If not, you're close. :)
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Orgasm
I think I might be going through menopause, and im only 19!! I have alot of the symptoms, irregular periods, i skip them so very often, hot flases(my face gets red and goes in and out of hot to cold), sweat alot, i feel like i have alot of male hormone i get hair where im not supposed to and it grows back so fast when i shave it, like i have some hair in between my breasts, above my lip, and under my chin, i get shaky alot, i am thinking maybe i might be already going through menopause, could anyone shed some light on this, how does a 19 year old already go through this?
It sounds like this could just be PMS. Mild hot flashes and sweating are common symptoms. Hair grows between your breasts, above your lips and under your chin naturally. As long as you don't have a beard, it's not an issue. If you shave hair off, it's going to grow fast. Just leave it alone. People will notice stubble more than a little hair. Take a look at some other girls and you'll notice they have the same hair. Darker hair would show up more of course, but yeah, everyone's got it. People don't notice your body hair just as you don't notice theirs. Most women won't have a regular cycle until they are well into their 20's. The shakiness could be coming from dehydration, tension, fatigue, or a number of other possible symptoms of PMS. It's VERY unlikely that you are going through menopause. Talk to your doctor about this anyways. PMS can be treated. A good start would be to get more calcium into your diet. Good luck :)
http://www.coolnurse.com/pms.htm
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Menopause
i have been with my boyfriend for a year in 4months and it seems like were falling out of love what can i do?
After awhile, the romance in relationships will die down. That doesn't mean that you don't love each other just as much. You've just gotten used to each other and aren't quite as infatuated. This is going to happen in any relationship you are in. You can try to bring some of the romance back, or you can sit back and enjoy the next chapter. I think a little romance every once in awhile is a positive thing. Try going back in time. Relive your first date, bring your boyfriend, blindfolded, to a place that's special to you, make him something, the list goes on. Don't do anything drastic just because your feelings for each other are maturing. Take it one step at a time. Think about whether this guy is someone that is worth going through more time with. Did you love him just for the romance, or is there something else there? Good luck. :)
OKay well im 14/f... lemme give you some backround... my dad has cancer and he gets chemo every other week.... its realli stressful... i have a nice house and a loveing family... but for a while now i have been a cutter... yes i know it pathetic... but i havent done it to often anymore... ive been thinking of suicide alot.like how i would do it... is this normal?? ive gotten to the point in my life were im not afriad to do it anymore.. like before i would have never gone through with it cause i was to scared.. i dont wanna get profeccional help.. i cant let my family know whats going on.. im just realli confused and i dont know what to do anymore..please help
I would urge you to tell someone that is close to you. Even though it would be the right decision, I understand why you wouldn't want to do that. If you can't get over this yourself, you are going to have to tell someone, but in the meantime there is something you can try first. A good first step would be a call to a hotline. The people there are professionals and you would be completely anonymous. They should be able to help you a lot. A counselor at your school would be another good option. Make sure everything would be confidential before you say anything. I wish you the best of luck.
Self-Injury Hotline
SAFE (Self Abuse Finally Ends) Alternatives Program
www.selfinjury.com
1-800-DONT CUT (1-800-366-8288)
Suicide & Crisis Hotline
1-800-999-9999
Suicide Hotline - (National Adolescent)
800-621-4000
I got the numbers from this website http://www.coolnurse.com/hotline.htm. There are a bunch more if you think a different one will help you more than the ones I gave you. Again, good luck. :)
Okay I'm 15 and been dating my boyfriend for a year now and we were at homecoming and we danced every slow song together because we said we would. He has these two friends who like to hang out with him and his other friend and the two girls are nice, but they flirt with him and one of them just went up to him right in front of me when she heard a slow song come on and grabbed my boyfriend and started dancing with him. So I went over and started talking to some of my friends and tried to act like it didn't bother me cause I didn't want to be mean and say no you cant dance with him. But I wanted to burst out crying. And I told him that I didn't like it when he did that. So do you think that I should just tell him that I don't like it when he hangs around this girl or just ask the girl to stop flirting with him or just let it go on as if nothing is wrong? Thanks!!
She danced with him, he didn't dance with her. You have no reason to be mad at your boyfriend. Be mad at the girl that thinks he's interested in her at all. What she did was very rude. She didn't give your boyfriend a choice in whether he wanted to dance with her or not. Your boyfriend wasn't going to cause a scene. He did the nice thing and suffered through the few minutes he was forced into spending with her instead of you. Your boyfriend, as you know, is a great catch so of course other girls will be interested in him. That's not his fault. Think of it as a good thing. A reminder that you are with an awesome guy. He could have chosen anyone, but he picked you. He hasn't cheated on you and he isn't showing signs of not liking you or having committment issues. He's not interested in other girls like they are interested in him. You're really lucky. I know that its hard to not let these types of things bother you, but don't take it out on your boyfriend. He's just caught in the middle and if you say anything to him about this he'll think that you are a really jealous person or that you don't trust him at all. Those are two things you don't want him thinking. It could put a huge strain on your relationship. Let your feelings settle and if you want to approach him about it, do it in a week or so when you are calm and be very careful what you say and how you say it. Good luck. :)
My girls all think that I am a sex freak. I am not saying I am a good in what I am doing, I am just saying that I do it a lot. I know I am not supposed to bring my girl to the house all the time just for sex. I am supposed to take her out etc. But I dont care, I can spend months inside the house doing nothing but having sex. I can come like 17 times a day, I am man by the way.It is not that I am young or I am not getting any, I just cant get enough. Besides, my girls all think that I have been starving for years if you know what I mean. If we go out, all I think about is sex. We might as well end up having sex in some public place. Its not that I dont love my girls or something, I do, I treat them good, and talk sweet to them, buy them stuff and dont cheat on them. If I am taking my girl out, I feel like I m loosing my time not getting freaky with her. I love to do nothing with my girl, just chill and get freaky. I dont have the patience not to take them out and stuff but sometimes its the only option.
Most of the times after sex and after I take my girl to her house, I jack of thinking about the hole situation. I dont know anyone like me, I know it is not a problem nad it causes no damage to health but still, this cannot go on. I am literarely horny 24/7 and I am hard most of the time, more than 50% of the time. I get hard in the dumbest most boring places.Sitting right next to this hairy guy in the bus, and all of the sudden I think about my girl and ...
Any siggestions?
Your age is very important in this situation. In any case, see a doctor. You're right, it's not a problem per se, but being able to relax every once in awhile and not be quite so horny would be very nice for you. Plus, it could easily become a problem. Maybe there's some kind of therapy or medication that could help you live a more normal life. I'm not saying there's something wrong with you and you need to take medication, but it would be good to explore your options and get advice from someone that knows what they're talking about - a doctor. Good luck. :)
I am eighteen an never had my first kiss (never even close). . . . . .nor have i even had a boyfriend. . . i know. . . . . is there something wrong?
18, Female
Nothing's wrong at all. I was 18 and a half when I had my first kiss and now, 2 years later, I'm very happily engaged. Many of the people I know that had relationships earlier in their lives aren't even close to that point yet. I started out way behind the game and now, I'd say I'm a little ahead. Don't worry so much about it. Your time will come and it will probably be really special since you've had to wait so long. It will also be really meaningful since you will be more mature than most when they have their first kiss. Good luck :)
I'm 15, 5'1 and I weigh 85 pounds.
No, I never had an eating disorder.
I really want to gain 15 pounds.. Because I can't fit in a size 0 or 1 in jeans. I would like my hipbones not to stick out.. or my shoulder blades..
I want some fat on me. But I dont know what foods to eat. I know fatty foods, but list some meals. I'm going to do a milkshake a day. Or close to every day. (Is that healthty?)
I have a very high metabolism.. I heard, you should eat at night or before bed because you won't burn off the fat or something ?
If people think losing weight is hard.. gaining weight is even harder.
I've been struggling with it for 2 years.
See a nutritionist about this. The milkshake thing is silly. It isn't going to help you gain a single pound. Not only won't it work, eating a ton of fatty foods is very unhealthy for you. By omitting healthy foods from your diet, your body won't be getting all the nutrients it needs to funtion. You'll probably get really sick. Please don't try it. A nutritionist will be able to give you a diet that is right for your body and will help you gain and maintain weight in a healthy way. If you can't find or can't see a nutritionist, your regular doctor might be able to help you instead. Good luck :)
ok me & my ex get started talkin again i found out she likes me && i kinda like her back but i promised myself that i wouldnt go back out with her ckuz she doesnt trust me or believe me with nothin i say so everytime we talk my feeling come back to her. what should i do
No matter how much you like her, you know that you're not entirely compatible with her. Relationships are based on more than just liking someone. Sure, it could work out, but it's probably not worth trying. Once you break up with someone, there's not much of a chance that you'll have a successful relationship with them in the future. A break up puts a huge wall between you that won't ever completely be broken down. If you are willing to work extra hard and go through a lot of pain to make it work out, go ahead and try. Just know that there's a good chance that in the end it will fall apart again. Remember that there are tons of other people out there that you could be happy with. I'd say that you should go with your logic and not take her back. Everybody always says to follow your heart, but it's your head that's usually right. Good luck.
18/f/NJ
Kayla
my boyfriend fingered me yesterday and i've done it before and he says he has too but he never touched my clit during the whole entire time, which made it hurt. how can i teach him to do it in a nice way? without hurting his feelings? cuz it hurt when he did it cuz he didn't touch my clit for a while first!!
Just telling him what to do would be the easiest way to do it. It's not going to hurt his feelings unless you tell him he's doing a bad job. If you tell him it would be better if he did it another way he'll be more than happy to try it for you. If you really don't wanna say anything, just put his hands how you want them and guide him through what you want him to do without words. When he's doing it right let him know. You could even just do it yourself. He would probably catch on after awhile and take over for you. Good luck.
15 f & bf is 18
After ditching school to go to my bf's house one day, my parents found out and my mom said to me "I hope you two aren't having sex, but if you are I at least want you to be on birth control". Her mom was all about "don't do it"..but, duh, people have sex eventually. My mom just wants me to be safe.
I haven't had sex yet, but I am ready for it. I'm comfortable with my boyfriend and we talk about sex and birth control and what we would do if I get pregnant.And since he has had sex before, he went and got tested for AIDS and well, the whole deal really.. - Me and my boyfriend see eachother once a week, if that, because his parents don't like me, and my dad doesn't like him.
My question is this: If we only see eachother once a week, will I still have to take birthcontrol all week long? And if so, why?
http://www.coolnurse.com/
You can learn a lot from this site especially since your school isn't teaching you anything. It has a ton of information and I hope you spend some time looking at it.
You don't necessarily have to take birth control pills. There are other forms of birth control that you could choose. Check out this page to learn more about birth control and birth control pills (which you would take once every single day).
http://www.coolnurse.com/birthcontrol.htm
Good luck :)
It will be my boyfriend and I's one year anniversary in January on the 31st, i really want to do something special for him. I was thinking of a scrapbook or something, but i dont have very many pictures (because he doesnt like them) and we dont have very many things we did together like movies and stuff. Im hoping i get a job sometime this week since i have a 2nd interview tomorrow, so then ill have some money to use. But i need ideas, please help.
Thanks In Advance,
Racquel
From my experience, I've found that guys don't really like homemade, sentimental stuff like scrapbooks. Since he doesn't even like pictures of himself that's a bad idea altogether. Guys, in general, would rather that you went out and bought them something practical. Since you've been with him a year you probably know what he's into. Get him a hat, CD, DVD, video game, book or something of that nature. It's not going to cost more than 20 dollars if you spend a little time looking. If you are really tight on money, bake him something. He'll love it. If you must go the sentimental route, make a scrapbook of yourself for him. Put pictures of yourself in it and write a few poems or stories about how much you like him and such. Remember too, that no matter what you get or make, even if it is a little sentimental, he's going to like it just the same because it's from you. It's not the quantity, or the quality. It's the effort and love that you put into it. He'll see that and he'll really appreciate whatever you decide to do. Good luck. :)