NinjaNeer's advice column

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Q: Dear Advicenators,
My son is 25. He has a BS degree in electrical engineering and a decent job. He has some student loans he is in the process of repaying. As caring parents we told him he could stay at home after graduation to get a heads up on paying extra on his loans and we would not charge rent or anything like that. It has been one year now and I am finding it stressful that he is home. He is very unappreciative of anything I do for him. He is also rude to us and disrespects our rules and wishes in our own home. Needless to say, he isn't paying any extra on his loans and I have to constantly remind him to pay them on time. He has lived on his own at college and I feel like it's time for him to be back out on his own but how do I really know when it's time to tell him to leave? Signed a concerned mother

It's time to leave when you think it is.

Just so you know where this is coming from, I'm 22 years old and have been living away from my parents' house for 5 years now. I've actually owned my own house for the last year and a half and I'm putting myself through college.

You need to give your son a big kick to the butt. You've got to sit him down and tell him what's on your mind and what you're considering doing to rectify the situation.

Here's what I think:

1) You're not his babysitter

He's a big boy. He can pay his own bills on time, and he sure as heck can deal with the consequences if he doesn't. Stop mommying him, strong as those impulses might be. No more telling him to save and pay his bills. Leave him to deal with his own messes, because that's the only way he'll learn. Trust me on this one; my parents left me to deal with an unpaid cell phone bill, and it took me a year and shattered credit to finally get up the gumption to do something about it. Lesson learned? Yes.

2) Your house, your rules.

Tell him what your rules are. Inform him that if he doesn't choose to follow those rules, that he is free to seek lodging elsewhere or to pay you rent. Those rules should include respect. If you're giving him a place to live with the expectation that he pays down loans, make a rule that says he must save X percent of his income towards loan payments in order to stay with you.

3) It's not impossible to pay loans and live on your own!

I'm working my way through college, paying a mortgage and bills and still managing to build a small emergency fund. I think your son, who is 3 years older and capable of working full time (I can only do part time right now) should be able to handle the expenses. He won't learn fiscal responsibility unless he's pushed. If he has no incentive to pay extra on his bills (i.e. he has his rent covered, so he feels he can spend on frivolous things) he won't do it. Heck, if I didn't have to think about the possibility of losing my house if I spent an extra $300 a month on partying, I'd be at the bars right now! Booting him out may be the best thing to change his mindset. It might also ruin him financially. Either way, he'll learn a lesson which everyone needs to learn at some point. You can't protect him from the world forever!

Q: I was reading here about somebody doing a W@H job for awhile. I don't know if it's common for them to go out of business but I figured that if there was ONE company doing something with Work@Home then more companies were offering this type of job opportunity. Where can I find REAL work at home jobs though? I am in the U.S. if that matters...

I worked at home for a while for a call answer service. You get a headset and a computer, and you take calls from your house.

The only catches with that sort of thing is that a) the hours are often odd and b) you are required to have absolute silence. No barking dogs, no children.

Q: I like to take my little twin boys out once a month. We end up going through a drive-thru somewhere and getting lunch or dinner and heading down to the playground or park area for a couple of hours. We always have such a nice time but I have a problem when we first start the adventure at the drive-thru! As soon as we are in the line at the speaker post both of my boys start going crazy. They start yelling and screaming and trying to get out of their seats. They say all sorts of things from greeting the person taking my order over and over and OVER again to demanding ice cream, cookies, toys, and other treats. It's so embarrassing and I'm sure the order-takers probably think I can't control my own kids in a drive-thru line!
How can I help them control their excitment so that I don't have to be embarrassed and things will actually go smoothly for once?

You need to set down consequences. They're old enough to put 2 and 2 together. Simply distracting them isn't enough; this is a lack of cause and effect.

Why should they quiet down when you're going through the drive-thru? They get a reaction out of you and out of the cashiers as well, with no ill consequences.

You need to let your boys know that going through the drive-thru is a special treat, and that they need to behave like they deserve it. IF they sit still and IF they are quiet, they can have their treat (meal). If they are noisy, or if they try to get out of their seats, they don't get a treat because they haven't earned it. The moment they start acting up, you need to apologize to the person at the drive-thru and pull out of there without getting anything for the kids. They'll learn soon enough that they need to be quiet and calm.

Q: So for most of my life I've been fat. I just kept gaining weight. Fortunately, I've finally mastered the art of maintain my weight and at least not gaining any more. I'm 16, female, 5'3" and my weight on any given day is between 194-200lbs. I honestly wouldn't care much if I hadn't found out i'm prediabetic. I really don't want to get diabetes so I'm looking for some advice on how to eat better, exercise more, and just lose all this extra weight. I'm a busy person and I don't have a lot of time in my day so please keep that in mind but I'd like to los weight as fast as possible.

Also, I have some issues with motivating myself. Any advice on how I can make myself stick to a plan would also be appreciated.

I'm trying to lose 100 lbs over the course of a year.

There's no fast way to lose weight and keep it off. There are, however, simple little things you can change to make things easier on yourself.

1) Stay hydrated. I lost 7 lbs worth of water weight last week just by cutting Diet Coke out of my diet (It hurt, lemme tell you) and starting to drink 4 litres of water a day.

2) Do things the hard way. Take the stairs instead of the elevator, park a little further away, walk or bike to the store instead of driving. For me, it was forcing myself to clean the house and do a workout before I'm allowed to play video games.

3) Count those calories! Losing weight really is simple math; no tricks to it. If calories in < calories out, then you'll lose weight.

I would not suggest going to a doctor, oddly enough. Most "diet doctors" will put you on a severely restricted calorie plan (think 700 cals/day) which yes, will make you lose weight fast but will also make you gain it all back once you stop it since your body's gone into starvation mode.

I use a great site called My Fitness Pal, which has really intuitive and easy calorie counting and exercise tracking. You put in your goals and it calculates what your intake should be for a day. The food database is huge! There's also a great online support system; every time I lose a pound, there are 3 people congratulating me on it! The forum is full of people posting success stories, motivation and recipes. Best part is, it's entirely free. A great way to track your progress.

As for motivating yourself, find a picture of your goal, whether it's a picture of you skinny or a celebrity, or even a great outfit you want to wear! Put it somewhere where you can see it, like on the fridge. Every time you pass it, think about how great that will feel.

Props to you for getting this under control!

Q: So I'm 22/ F and my boyfriend is 24/M we want to go somewhere on vacation this summer just the two of us. Of course we want something that is affordable but also fun...any ideas? Any websites?

Thanks! :)

First off, where do you live? The cost of travel really depends on where you're starting from :P

As for websites I use when I'm searching, here's what I do. I use one of the following sites, and look up last minute deals and specials every week. If you're more open to different places, you can get some insane deals.

expedia.com (or .ca)
travelocity.com (or .ca)
hotwire.com (good for hotels - you give a location and a star rating, and they give you a mystery hotel within that realm)

Mostly, I like to travel near home to keep things affordable. Like, I live within an hour's drive of Niagara Falls, ON. So I go there and stay for a night to feel fancy.

Q: hey! ok i have a friend and i guess she was just using me to get next to a guy she likes . the guy she likes is my friend and everytime i used to tell her he called me and things like that she would be calling me everyday. now that they aint together anymore she doesnt even bothers calling me..is not only that, is that a big problem happened...so i guess she hardly talks to me because of that big problem..but what bothers me is that in school she is all nice to me and is always looking for me but once she is out of school "pufff" she dissaperas..not even thru myspace she talks to me..it just pisses me off..and her cusin died and i was the one that was mostly there for her and she says am the only one that gives her good advices but now i dont even feel like talking to her..i think she is so fake towards me :( can you please help me. am sorry if this is too long . i just need some help on how to act with her.

If she's seeking time spent with you during school, I'd say that is a good thing. It means she wants to spend time with you in person! I would be more concerned if she spoke to you online and avoided you at school.

Yes, she has slowed down since things cooled off with that guy. These things do happen. Just remember that she didn't ditch you entirely, so it wasn't like she was just using you.

Q: When I told my husband I was pregnant he really didn't get too excited he just kept watching tv. Then not long after that I had a miscarriage and he said that it was for the best and not the right time. I was so upset. We have been married for 3 years and I have been desparately wanting a baby. He keeps saying we will try in a few months but when the time rolls around he keeps saying we will try soonbut not now. Now he says he wants to wait until we can afford a baby. To which I said, " If we wait until we can afford it we will never have a baby!" Sometimes I think he doesn't want a baby. Could I be right, or am I being selfish about wanting a baby now?

I have to go against all the other advicenators here, and probably against what you'd like to hear as well.

You say "If we wait until we can afford it, we will never have a baby!"

If you can't afford a baby, you should not be having one. Not to say that you need to be rich to have a baby, but if you're not financially stable you shouldn't be bringing dependents into the world.

It's not just diapers and formula. It's things like a college fund and access to a good school that your child should have.

To bring a child that you cannot afford into the world IS being selfish. To want one? Not at all.

However; that said, I think your husband is being less than supportive. Having a miscarriage is a terrible thing, and he should have been there for you. However he felt about it should have been kept to himself, because he should have been consoling you. Do you really want to raise children with this man? He needs to smarten up considerably before you should even consider procreating with him.

_______________________________________________

Edit time!

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Thank you for the extra info. With all of that in mind, I think it's up to you in the end. You need to decide what is more important to you; having a happy marriage (assuming he doesn't want children) or having children. You really can't force children on him, as I'm sure you know. At best he would stick around but be resentful, and at worst he could take off.

Does he understand exactly how you feel about it? Maybe if you try telling him that you really want children within a certain time period, and that you are willing to find someone else who does want to have babies, he'll come around. Don't threaten him, but let him know what your thought process is.

If he's concerned about the financial aspect, try writing up a budget together. Work out exactly what you would need in order for him to feel comfortable and how you could do it.

Q:

I was just wondering, I'm a plus size. I always wanted nice clothes. Lately I've been thinking about maybe trying maturity wear (Although I'm not pregnant) The question is...Would it show my stomach? I know it's for woman who are pregnant but can you still wear them if you are not pregnant without your stomach showing? Can people tell if it's maturity wear? I just like some of the clothes they have. Rather than shopping at places like Walmart.

Thanks

The problem with maternity wear is that there's only going to be extra room in the tummy area. Most of us plus-size gals need extra room everywhere! You might find that it's too tight in the chest, or the arms, or if you get pants, in the legs but not the waist.

I would definitely recommend Addition-Elle, MXM and Penningtons. They're both stores that I shop at.

http://www.1-plus.com/additionelle.htm

(has links to the other two stores at the top)

Q: Ok, first off I want to say I know I'm very paranoid. I want to end this and never do what i do again. Here are the things I do..
1. I am always looking out the windows in my house, peeking out the blinds, to see if anyone is outside staring up at my window trying to watch me. Or if I'm on the first floor I'll look to see if anyone is sneaking on my porch to watch me through the windows.
2. I check my house for hidden cameras. Sometimes I'll get this feeling like there is a camera in my house and I'll check whatever areas necessary.
3. If I'm in a room with the door closed, i'll open it and peek around and listen for who is possibly in the other rooms
4. I have to have the doors closed and draws all closed. If the door is left open, the crack of darkness creeps me out, making me think that someone is watching me through it.
5. I get nervous and anxious and ready to find someone, but I never do.

I just want to stop all of this. Sometimes I will check out the window like 10x a minute. I know it doesn't make sense, I know no one is watching me, but I cant help but feel this way.

You may have anxiety or OCD... or both.

We can't make a diagnosis on here, but there's good news! I suffer from both, and they can often be treated with just counselling. A licensed therapist can help you to find out why you do this (a childhood incident? Phobias?) and help you to overcome your compulsions.

Q: Hey,my names Alyssa.& i broke up with my boyfriend Zack in like the middle of january. and we used to sit at the same lunch table and the day i broke up with him this other kid Mark got everyone in the table to put their legs out and take up all the seats so that i couldnt sit down. so i went and sat with these girls Roni, kim cait sam and dana, that day one of the girls wernt there and so i sat in her seat.that was yesterday. and today that girl was in school so i had to find somewhere else to sit. the only place i could find was behind Zacks table. i was really embarresed because Mark kept saying stufff reallly loud like "ALYSSA HAS NO FRIENDS! IF YOUR HER FRIEND, YOU GAY TOO!" and when i started eating, they started throwing food at me! and i ran to the bathroom and started crying. and i dont know what to do! my bestfriends turned agnst me. please help me.

Sweetheart, those are no friends.

These people are seriously immature and rude. You don't want to be friends with people like that.

Next time they pull crap like that, make sure you don't react negatively in front of them. Try turning and saying something like "Don't you have anything better to do with your time than irritate me?" or "Really? I thought we were out of kindergarten." These people are looking for you to get upset and shout or cry. If you act more mature than them and don't give them what they want, they'll look really stupid and childish.

If it continues, tell a teacher what is happening so that they can look out for you at lunch. It is harassment, and most schools have a no-tolerance policy.

Q: WARNING! VERY LONG.
hi. so i know the title is pretty vague, but i don't have a clue on what my situation is. firstly, i put down friendships as my catergory, but it's a lot to do with families and mental health.
so i'll start off by lettin gyou know that i'm clinically depressed. i've always been like this, since i was six. well that's my first memories of it. it's not uncommon, it's genetic. it does rule my life, and i think that if i had friends who were willing to listen to me tell them how to handle me, i'd be fine, despite that fact that i cut myself a lot - not too badly, nothing that would seriously hurt me, don't worry, they're practically scratches. unfortunatley, i don't have any friends. I also don't have family, but i'll explain that later.
I've tried counselling and therapy. i can't stand that soemone who doesn't, and will not ever care about me, is being paid to listen to me. i want a friend who actually genuinely does care about me to listen to me. like i say, i don't have that. i am fully aware of my depression, since i've had a long time to analyse myself. however, it's not just my attitudes to things that need changing. i know i have low self esteem, and tend to think negitavely. but i'm quite smart, and i think i can, and do change that mind set a lot of the time. unfortunatley, my situation really is against me. i'm in a school for people who are a lot smarter than me, and altough i know i'm clever, i feel constantly put down by them. the one person who i talk to most, and i guess by your terms, you could say she's my best friend, though i don't like her very much, even beat me to a scholarship, and though i don't say anything, it hurt me a lot.
Although i'm pretty aware of my mental health, i do tend to shut myself off. i can't help it. i finally got some ounce of courage to ask my GP about it. i already know, but i wanted some medication to make it easier. but she told me i'd ave to have a session with a specialist beofrehand, and i chickend out. i'm a pretty good liar, i have to be, because i get asked if i'm okay a lot by teachers, some even recommending me to therapists, and even when i'm in a doctors office, and am MEANT to talk about it, my defences go up, and i start pretending that i'm fine, causing them to believe me. it's my own damn fault, and i now, and it's killing me.
i know this may all sound really confusing. it's like i want help but am refusing to ask for it.
It's really complicated, i don't htink anyone can understand it, because every type of depression is different.
As well as all that shit, My dad walked out on me and my mom wen i was thriteen. i really can't bring myself to talk to anyone about it. remember i told you about my 'best friend'? well the most i've said to her is that i think my dad is a son of a bitch (which he is.) and my mom is a useless pathetic mess, who i am completely ashamed of. (i didn't tell her the last bit.)
Whenever i get into my lowest points, my mind automatically thinks about this, and all the other crap in my life (WHICH I REFUSE TO TALK ABOUT. IT'S FAR MORE PAINFUL FOR ME TO THINK ABOUT.), it jsut makes it worse.
I sometimesget into theese moods, in whihc my friend calls me a stone wall, because no matter ho ard she pushes, i won't talk or do anything.
I know it sounds like she want to talk to me, but it's hard to expalin. i know she doens't because i can tell se just gets annoyed at me, even when i try to start talking about it. i just got out of a really low point, and tried to tell her i had a bad week, and she just rolls her eyes and asks me that in comparision to starving kids in africa, what do i have to complain about. her mom has cancer, so i know thta everyone has teir own crap. but no on seems to get how hard it is to do this completely by myself.
i don't want to get on about my family, because it hurts a lot, but it's safe to say, i am alone.
i wish my friend could be online or something, so i could try to takl to her again, but not face to face at school, because even thoguh i'm not sad, one of my symptoms of depression is that i start crying randomnly, but i have never cried at school or in front of anyone before, and i would hate to cry in front of her. i want to talk to her, but not face to face. but she's being so stubborn about being on the internet, and i can't explain to her why i need her to do this. it's so impossible because i'm surrounded by people who are inexplicably being to uncooperative, and i hate confrontation and am really defensive, so i tend to always be the one who gets left on the sidelines whilst people argue, and moan. and it really sucks, because recently some of my symptoms ave been getting worse. one of the symptoms thta my GP had to explain to me was physical pain. apparently it's a real pain, but is caused by depression. i used to think i was having a stroke or a heart attack which freaked me out, and no one knew, and i didn't tell my mom or ayone because all i could think was that i must be a freak and relaly unhealthy if i was having a heart attack. turns out they were just a symptom, but it's becoming worse, and more often and i've been having a lot more panic attacks. so i really need to let this out. i thought asking this website would help, but i don't think anyone can do anything. that's okay. i'm used to dealing with things by myself since i was young (Like i said, I DON'T WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS.), but if you ave an opinon, maybe it might help. Right now, my suicidal impulses are at a low, but i've been on medication, so maybe that's why. please don't say crap like, don't kill yourself or cut yourself, because like i said, i am somewhat intelligent, and i know what i'm doing. just tell me how i can takl to a person. a uman perosn, not a hotline. or if you could just tlk about your own experiences or something. i don't know. i don't know what will help, but anything will do, right now. because i'm scare the pains, and panic attacks will get worse, and i'm running our of medication (not prescribtion) so i don't want things to get worse by then. thanks. sorry this was long.

Okay.

Just to give you a little background on myself, so you take my advice seriously: I'm 22 years old, dealing with bipolar disorder and anxiety. I just got my diagnosis a few months ago, but I've been living with symptoms for my entire life. I use a combination of counselor, psychiatrist and medication to work with my illness right now.

There are some issues with your outlook on this that need to be addressed. They are likely caused by your depression, but you can't let them rule you. I know, easier said than done.

You need to open up to your therapist. They're not paid to listen to you. They're paid to act as a mediator for your thoughts, and to help you work out your issues. If you don't feel like things are working with your therapist, like they just sit there, find a new one who is more proactive. As for them being a stranger, and you wanting a friend to talk to: it's not fair to put that amount of pressure on a friend. Friends will tell you what you want to hear rather than risk friendship; therapists will tell you what you NEED to hear. Friends aren't necessarily equipped to help you work through your depression. Everyone has issues of their own to deal with. That's why therapists exist; to allow someone to dedicate their time to working through someone else's mental health issues. They are highly trained professionals who know their stuff.

That being said, yes, you do need supportive friends. From the sounds of it, though, you aren't willing to open up and talk about the real issues. Actually, you flat-out tell us this several times, in caps lock. You have to be willing to really dig deep and self-analyze. Yes, it hurts. Goodness, I know from personal experience that it hurts. Thing is, unless you confront those issues beneath the surface, they'll bubble up from time to time. If you deal with them, they can't really come back to haunt you like that. So start talking. Talk to your therapist. Talk to a very close friend. Talk to yourself (in a diary, of course, not in public)! Just think about it really hard and stay in control. Don't let your issues cloud your life.

Your depression is affecting the way you look at your life in general. Heck, that's what it does to everyone. One way it's really affecting you is in how you look at the depression. Once you pull yourself out of this pit, it will just be a minor irritation, like having asthma or mild diabetes. Yes, it sucks, but you can monitor and manage it. You just need to shock yourself out of where you are now.

Here's what I had to do a few years ago to get myself out of a serious depressive spiral:

1) Stop making excuses. Stop saying "But I don't wanna!". If you know it makes sense, do it. Have someone you trust push you to do so. This is where therapists come in really handy. You don't wanna talk about your issues. You don't wanna seek treatment. You don't wanna... see a pattern here? You need to break that pattern, because it's keeping you down.

2) Stop equating being smart with being mentally healthy. It's not a sign of stupidity, having a negative mindset. You have depression. It's a genetically caused negative mindset. It isn't a sign of lack of self-control, and it certainly isn't a sign of stupidity. I'm a dean's honour list student at my college. Am I stupid? Was it because of stupidity that I failed out of school a few times? No, it was me NOT coping with the genetic cards life dealt me. You need help changing your mindset. You may need prescription help. You may need another person pushing you to change your mindset. You're fortunate in that you can self-analyze. Not many people have that ability. It's that ability that will make this go way faster for you. You know what you're doing. You know it's not doing you any good. So why do you do it?

3) Distance yourself from people who are "toxic". Everyone has those friends. Your best friend sounds like one of them. Those people who just can't seem to sympathize with your problems, because someone else is always worse off. Thing is, those starving kids in Africa have nothing on the starving kids in Africa who have AIDS. Are they not justified in being miserable? You have problems, and because they're yours, they are important. Depression causes people to feel worthless; this friend is reinforcing that idea. If you can't make new friends, befriend yourself. Spend time alone doing things that make you feel better. Pick up a new hobby. Work out. Enjoy yourself.

4) Stop looking so far into the future. And by that, I mean stop looking any further than 24 hours. Rather than worrying about those pesky "what-ifs" that fly around when you're anxious or depressed ("What if I have more panic attacks? What if I feel like this forever?") try to focus on the here and now. Look at the positives, as hard as it may be. Even if it's something silly like, "Hey! I got out of bed and showered today! I haven't felt like doing that in ages!" it'll make you feel better. Every thing you do is an accomplishment. Eventually, as your treatments begin working, you will start to be able to look further into the future. Once you've gone without panic attacks for a day, or a week, it's easier to envision another day or week without them.

5) Don't see relapses as the end of the world. If you have a panic attack, it doesn't mean you've lost all progress. These things will happen less and less as time goes by. Take it as a small hiccup in your progress, and keep on truckin'.

Bottom line: you need to hoist your own trousers, because nobody will do it for you. I know it's harsh, and that it's something you likely already know. It's all a matter of pushing past that big obstacle in the middle of your path and doing what you need to do for yourself.

If you need to discuss things further, you can always contact me by private question. Be warned: I won't sugarcoat things, but that's because I do have real life experience in this sort of thing and I know that sugarcoating doesn't work.

Q: Hello i was wondering what type of coin this is and if its worth any money?

http://tinypic.com/r/15gtnq8/6

http://tinypic.com/r/2yn56yp/6

It is a 500 yen coin, from the first year of the Heisei era, which began in 1989.

This means it's from 1989, with a current value of about $5.66 USD.

Since it's not old enough, it won't be worth anything as an antique... just like a one dollar bill from the 80s.

If you want to verify for yourself, here are the resources I used to identify it.

http://www.angelfire.com/retro/jordwm/JDates.html
http://www.lioncoins.com/nippon.htm

Q: I'm 18. I'm in high school. A high school for the GIFTED, actually, and yet half the kids in my school don't know the difference between "their" and "they're", "your"/"you're", "to"/"too", etc. And, well, neither does the rest of teenage America.

What the fuck? What HAPPENED. What the hell is wrong with this country that we can't learn grammatical laws that have been introduced to is in, what, second grade? Has having cell phones permanently put kids in "typin like dis lol" mode?

I feel your pain. Even worse are the weird ways of typing that take even longer.

Like Capitalizing Every Word, Regardless Of Whether It Should Be Or Not.

Orr addingg extrra letterss?

It's not cell phones. It's laziness. A lot of people don't think that they should have to put in the effort to type nicely for their friends and family that they would for, say, their boss. Then again, lack of practice because of this policy leads them to make more errors, often in serious venues.

To take the edge off the pain, though, these are great comics. I've been tempted to print them off and pass them out to my grammatically challenged friends.

Ten words you need to stop misspelling:
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/misspelling

How to use a semi-colon:
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/semicolon

How to use an apostrophe:
http://theoatmeal.com/comics/apostrophe

Q: okay so someone told me if i get my hair cut every 2 months my hair will grow more.. i took off an inch yesterday and its back to where it was 2 months agoo.. so how much hair am i suppose to take off?

Your hair grows at the average rate; about a half inch per month.

It won't grow faster, but it will look much healthier, giving the illusion of growth.

There's really nothing you can do to make your hair grow faster.

Q: when ever i think about sex I get really disgusted, sex seems so nasty and gross, i mean someone licking you down there and eating you out gross, and someone fingering you and putting there parts in you, im being serious, well my question is, Is sex gross?

When you really break it all down, sex is kinda gross and weird.

When you're having sex with someone you love and care about, none of the gross parts matter, because you're just making someone you love feel good, and they're doing the same to you.

It really is a lot of fun, but only with the right person. Otherwise, it's weird.

Q: My mom has told me for years now that I need to eat breakfast and that it's the right way to start my day. I understand that and I understand that it's suppose to help the brain function properly throughout the day. She also told me that it helps to keep my metabolism up and in a healthy range for my body.

Every time I try to eat breakfast in the morning I get sick though. I feel like I'm going to throw up and vomitting is NOT fun, especially right before school! I tried eating just toast or cereal and not heavy foods like greasy eggs and bacon but it doesn't seem to make a difference. My mom eats oatmeal in the morning but I haven't tried it but I doubt I would feel any better from eating it instead.

What is wrong with me and why can't I eat breakfast without getting sick? It's terrible so I just don't eat it at this point which means I go like 4 hours after I wake up before I eat anything. Is there anything I can take to make the nausea go away when I eat breakfast or anything I can do to keep myself from getting sick?

I'm exactly the same way. I just can't seem to eat a big breakfast before 10:30 in the morning.

My favourite is oatmeal (the 5 minute kind, NEVER instant!) and fresh fruit. You only need a very little bit and it keeps you from getting hungry throughout the day. Other than that, I'll sometimes skip the oatmeal and just have an apple or some pineapple or melon. Just a little something to give the energy boost we all need in the morning without making you feel like you swallowed a rock.

Stay away from greasy, heavy foods and dairy products. Your stomach may be more sensitive to these foods early in the day because it's entirely empty.

Q: I asked this question a few days ago, but i had some things to add. So, I shoplifted the other day. Not anything huge, just some earrings from American Eagle and a shirt from Forever 21. They didn't have an ink tag or anything, just a price tag with a barcode, which I ripped off. I have a job, along with money from my parents. So i can understand how I would seem ungrateful. But the truth is, no matter how much money i have, I can't afford EVERY single thing I want. Which i know i shouldn't ask of that anyway.. but shoplifting is like a high for me. I get such a rush from knowing that I can get away with it. I know it's wrong. But I'm going to continue to do it because i like doing it. I saw it as an easy solution. I hid them under clothes to take in the dressing room, so the attendant saw no difference. And I also bought a shirt, in case there could be any suspicion. But my question is, are there security cameras in the dressing room.. is that even legal ? Or what are others ways I could get caught ?
ALSO, it's not like I'm going to steal clothes with an ink tag. And if the dressing room attendant counts my clothes, obviously I wont take any because i'll have to have the same amount when I come out. And like I said, I will buy something else from the store I'm stealing from.

(And please PLEASE do not tell me about how shoplifting is wrong. I don't have a guilty conscience about it, and I'm going to continue to do it.)

17/f

You've asked this question here before, and I believe you got the same answer from everyone.

You can't ask us questions about illegal activities on this website. If we did give illegal advice, it could get this entire site shut down, which would ruin it for all the law-abiding users.

Shoplifting is a crime, and it hurts more than just the business owners. It hurts the consumers, who have to pay higher prices to pay for your stolen goods. It hurts the employees, who get paid a little less because of losses. I was even fired from a retail job in high school because of excessive shoplifting during my shift.

Q: My boyfriend and I REALLY want to have sex in the shower for our first time. He said his friend told him that if we use some sort of soap (like bar soap or even SHAMPOO) that we won't have to worry about me getting pregnant. That way we won't have to buy condoms or anything too. Sounds great, yeah? :D

My parents are going to be away this saturday for a little while and I thought about asking my boyfriend to come over and we could do it in the shower. ;) I'm kind of nervous about the soap thing though because I don't want to end up being a pregnant teen.

:) Is it true that you can't get pregnant if you use soap as lubrication during sex in the shower?
And, if so, what is the best soap/shampoo to use for lube in the shower? ;) ;) THANKS

DON'T DO IT!

First off, you CAN get pregnant this way.

Secondly, you can seriously damage yourself if you get soap forced up inside of you! You can end up with a really bad infection.

Q: im selling a mac computer i think its the macintosh and ive had for about a few years it works great and all but i want to see it for a laptop. How much could i see it for or if i go to a pawn shop how much will they offer. theres no scratched its pretty clean and runs well..

Which Mac is it? What are you selling it with?

Unfortunately, without this information, we really can't help.

My suggestion would be to go on eBay and look for the same computer. See what other people are selling it for. Then base your price off of that.

Q: I don't mean to sound stupid but I'm curious if zombies are actually real to some extent. I'm not talking about the "zombies" you see in movies and on the television though that are after brains (or should I say "brraaainnsss!"). I also don't mean an actual invasion of zombies that tends to be the basis on many movies. I'm just talking about the walking dead, I suppose. Is there a such thing as the walking dead? Are there real incidences of zombies or A zombie? Any proof to back up a zombie theory? Just curious, really...

I looked up zombies, and found the Wikipedia page really interesting.

Apparently, there is a basis for it, but it isn't exactly like they show on TV. I'd summarize, but I don't think I could tell it nearly as well as Wikipedia!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zombie

bio

My Personal Forum

My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.

In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.

Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.

I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.