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My column is dedicated to telling it like it is. I will always give you the best information available to me or the best advice I can. I will be upfront and never hide the truth from you.The one thing I will not do is you homework. I will try and point you towards the answer or help you find the answers you looking for. Ultimately you will have to find the answer yourself.
advice
Okay, I have been sexually active since I was 15. I've been with two different guys, one was 5 inches, and the other is 8 in a half. I have realized that I have never bleed during sex. I don't think I've had my cherry popped, and Im wondering if its something I should be concerned about?
You may have lost your Hyman through some other activity. If you are active in sports that would or could have caused your Hyman to tear. Some girls do not bleed at all and some girls bleed very little when they have their Hyman torn through penetration. Both of your sex partners were long enough to tear it. You may have been one of the lucky young lady's to not bleed.
You may also be a young lady whose Hyman is open in the center and both your partners were able to pass through it. In this case you would be a technical virgin since you have an intact Hyman. The only way to know for sure is to have a doctor exam in you. Which since you are now sexually active is a good idea. As a 15 year old theblaw provides you with total medical confidentiality. Meaning your doctor stour parents anything about your visit without your written permission and mom mcannot observe the exam unless you give your permission.
Last but not least; tall to the doctor about birth control and alway, always use a condom.
Sorry this is long, please take the time to read!!
f/22 I was diagnosed with severe depression 4 months ago. It started with insomnia, I had trouble concentrating at Uni, felt insecure about my future e.g. what profession to choose, and then I started having terrible anxiety attacks & was crying all the time. I had to move back to my parents because I couldn't take care of myself anymore, and at some point I was scared to leave the house. Now I take an antidepressant and something against anxiety, and I'm also seeing a therapist and I feel a lot better, but I still have those horrible anxiety attacks. I don't trust myself anymore, I fear that I might go crazy and start screaming in public if I have an anxiety attack, or that I might do something to myself once I'm alone. I would never willingly hurt myself, but I'm not myself anymore when I have an attack. The semester is about to start again and I really want to go back to Uni and continue my studies, even if it's only a couple of courses, but I'm literally scared out of my wits by these anxiety attacks. and what's worse I can't concentrate on studying, and I'm supposed to sit exams. I don't want to tell my friends from university, because I know they can't keep a secret and I don't want to be tagged as 'the weird one'. I know I shouldn't give a fuck, but its hard enough without people giving you weird glances.
has anyone gone through something like this? how did you deal with anxiety attacks? please help me!!!
Two questions that need to be answered first. Are you being treated by a psychiatrist and psychologist or a general practitioner and some other form of therapist. If the answer is the second pair you need to change doctors.
I've gone through what you are now going through and understand how you feel. On top of the depression you can add in be scared out of your wits, at least I was. This is a terrible place to be and it takes a while to climb out. For me it was my third therapist that clicked with me.
With her help we identified the root cause of my depression and then worked on ways to deal with them. As we did so other deeper problems surfaced and we dealt with them. That was 5 years ago; the initial cause of my depression was, as I now put it, the straw that broke the camels back. There were deeper problems that I was keeping buried and once the dam broke they all came tumbling out.
I'm in a better place today; it took a lot of work and a lot of support from my therapist,psychiatrist, friends and family. Some of the problems will never go away they are that deep seated. I have learned to understand them and understand not only how to deal with them but they were not my fault. They go as far back as childhood.
I tell you all this to show you there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I know you are in a scary place right now. With the right doctor and therapist you can and will work your way out, but it is up to you.
I know you do not live in the states; most likely in the UK or Australia and probably covered by National Health Insurance. Feeling the way you have written I would suggest two things. First I do not think you should try and go back to UNI this semester; I do not think you you are ready for the added stress.
Second: Go to the nearest hospital emergency room and ask for help. Bring a copy of the letter you wrote us with you. You possibly need a change in medications and Doctors. Given how hard it is to get appointments with National Health doctors and as a first responder myself, I would consider from what you have written that you are in an emergency condition and in need of immediate help. If you cannot get to the hospital call 999 or the emergency number for where you are at.
Most importantly please remember that how you feel at the moment is not permanent; there are better days ahead.
heard this guy gave this girl hpv after i had sex with him but we used a condom also his ex has hepititus c wooow but anyway so advice on what the chances are? condom was fine didnt rip or anything and i also talked to a nurse who said hep c was rarely transmitted suxually?, anyway advice? but only serious advice please thanks
The best advice I can give you is to be tested. Tell the doctor that you had protected sex with someone that may have given someone else hpv after unprotected sex and that you also understand his ex has Hep.C. This will tell the doctor what specifically to look for.
You can go to one of the free clinics that may be available where you live or your family doctor can order the tests.
If you still live at home and are over the age of 13 your medical privacy is protected by law. You can visit your doctor in private without mom observing or being consulted. The doctor is prohibited by law for discussing any medical information with anyone without you specific written permission. To do so would mean the loss of their license, a huge fine and up to 10 years in jail. The law is called HIPPA; Health Information Privacy and Portability Act.
I tell you all this so you will go and get tested. This is the only way to know for sure nothing has been transmitted to you. The fact that you used a condom is good and most likely protected you. Being tested is a safety check.
You will also be asked for the name and address of your partner so the heath department can be contact about him; if they have not already been contacted.
I got my period 10 1/2 months ago. How do i tell my mom i got my period. I really need help.
The two answers below mine are both excellent answers. I'm only going to put my two cents in about talking to mom about girl stuff. I would do the same for guys with there dads about guy stuff. Yes guys have problems with their bodies too, when puberty hits and my advice is gender neutral; mostly.
There are probably certain things you will not want to discuss with you mom such as when you become sexually active and sexual positions. Other than those two my advice is to remember mom was once your age and has gone through everything you are going through.
If you have a question about your body and some of the changes that are occurring the best source of information is your mother. Is something that is happening suppose to happen, mom will know. Everyone is a little different, mom will know when something is normal or not; so don't hide things from her. When it comes to your period you can discuss the pros and cons of Tampon usage with her and the correct way to insert them.
Your going to experience growing pains, tell mom when you feel different things. She can help you feel more comfortable while this goes on. Your social activities will change as well. Boys are going to look at you differently, mom can help with this as well as she had to learn how to fend them off.
Teenagers today live in a very stressful world, more so then when your mother was a teenager and I before her; yes I'm that old. As a teenager you do not need the added stress of worry changes to your body when the resource for the answer is right in your own home.
If I can offer the following suggestion: Ask mom if the two of you could have a weekly girls night out of the house. It doesn't have to be much. Maybe a trip to the mall to window shop Stop for ice cream or a beverage where you can sit and talk privately about anything that may be on your mind. Nothing is off limits and mom agrees to try and answer them.
hello, i wanna start taking the pill im 21 and im very nervous i dont trust condoms so i have the money and everything i dont care about going to get them , the only problem is , is it really necesarry to go to see a doctore before start taking them? or do i just get them and start the process? why do you need to go see a gynecologist if in fact i need to ? im very stressed out and its not easy to get an appointment with a gynecologist cause first id have to go into general apoointment with a general medicine doctor, then they could send me with the gynecologist etc...cause thats how health system works where i live, we don't have planned parenthood things here i am not from the US, why do they say you need to see your doctor before being put on the pill? cant i just buy it and start taking it ? thanks !
Other then the fact you are not from the U.S. you don't say where you are from. It sounds like wherever you are from they have some form of National Heath and doctors must follow their guidelines.
First: As others have said Birth Control Pills are a prescription medication and vary greatly in the types that are available. Only a doctor after reviewing you medical history and brief exam if necessary can determine if you should be taking birth control pills and which type is right for you.
Second: Most important is that once you are on Birth Control Pills it is extremely important that you have regular check ups by your doctor(s). Where I live a family practice doctor can provide these check ups as well as prescribe Birth Control Pills. If your medical program requires a Gynecologist to prescribe them then that is the way things are. Ask you family doctor for a referral to a female Gynecologist as I believe you be more comfortable with a female doctor.
Regardless of who the doctor is you should not be embarrassed or stressed by these medical appointments. As with any prescription medication
a doctors supervision is very important for you well being. Be open and honest with your doctor about your medical history. Birth Control Pills may not be the best form of contraceptive for you. If not your doctor will discus with you other forms that are just as effective. This is why you need to see a doctor before starting any medication.
My friend ahley thinks she is pregnet and what would happen if she has the baby???
If she decides to keep the baby the courts could, but doubtful given her age, award her the status of emancipated minor. This would mean she would be considered an adult in the eyes of the law.
Then depending on the laws of the state you live in a number of other things could happen all of which fall under he supervision of the Office of Child Services.
Much would depend on the role her parents would be willing to play. The age of the baby's father would need to be determined as well. Depending on his age the state could pursue legal charges, if he is more than 4 years older than her. His parents would have to assume some financial responsibility for the child until he his old enough to do so himself.
There is much more that could happen, would happen if she keeps the baby. All of which is dependent on her home life, her ability in the eyes of social services to care for the baby. All of which is predicated on the laws of the state she lives in.
My advice: While she may be old enough to physically bare a child; I do not think she will be judged old enough to to be responsible to raise the child. Unless her parents are willing to step in and become her child's guardian and deemed acceptable by social services to do so; I think it is best she consider putting the child up for adoption or consider abortion if it is an option.
Working against her in the eyes of Social Services is the fact that she is 11 years old and having sex and getting pregnant. Unless the pregnancy was the result of rape, incest or some other type of molestation her home life may be viewed as unfit. Both she and the baby could end up in different foster care settings. I realize what I just wrote is alarming but you did ask what could happen. These are some of the things at the disposal of Social Services to handle situations like this. Nothing says it will happen. I don't know her or her parents; Social Services will evaluate the situation and make what they feel is the best solution for her and the baby. The courts will have the final say.
hey, sorry if its in the wrong column and long
hi, im 16/f
well, my bf and i have been dating for 4 almost 5 yrs now and our parents and siblings get along great. we both really love each other and we'r even taking it to the next level (after kissing) ;). i know that i may be too young, but im almost 17 now and it will be the 1st time for both of us, and we WILL be using a condom. i would love to take the next step in our relationship but there's 1 problem. i dont know how to put this but i have a jungle down there if you know what i mean. and i dont know how he will take that cause i read online that one of the top 10 ways to end a r-ship are poor grooming down there. plus im not exaggerating this but HIS PENIS might get stuck in that bush while trying to get in MY VAGINA. so what im trying to ask is is there any way i can make my "jungle" disappear. i need an answer asap caus we're gonna have sex next friday night, as a valentines day gift seeing how we have school on mon we'll be celebrating on fri. first a day out together doing what we want to do and then dinner and back to his place for the night. his parents will be gone for the weekend and his brother is staying at his friends house. but my parents are ok with me staying the night at his place cause he will be home alone and its better to have someone with you and not throw a prty while your parents are gone. but thy do not know of the sex part. so should i tell them that ornot cause they wont let me stay with him then and i dont know what to do. so please help me with those 2 questions. thanks very much :)
First things first; I'm a male old enough to be your grandfather and I answer questions on this site to offer the wisdom my many years have brought to me as well as the insight I have come by. Most importantly I want to put forth the truth so you can make the right decisions about questions such as the one you are asking.
As to your hair. The purpose of the pubic and vagina hair is one of protection that dates way back on the evolutionary scale. Some men like a hairy women and some men don't. As to your boyfriends penis getting stuck in your hair, it won't happen so don't worry about it.
There was a time when men wanted a hairless woman so women would use different methods to remove this hair. Today it appears the pendulum is swinging back to women with hairy pubes. At one time my wife and I made it a part of our foreplay for me to remove or trim her pubic hair. I would do so using scissors and a razor.
If you are truly concerned with your pubic hair you could use a scissor to trim the hair in front of your vagina. Then you would have no concern with your boyfriends penis getting caught in your hair.
I would suggest before removing the rest of your pubic hair you allow your boyfriend to see you in all your womanly glory and the then both of you can decide how much or how little hair to remove.
i'm 21 and i was a virgin til last night, i had sex with this guy we ued a condom but i had a question since it was all dark i could just feel it that the condom didnt got to the END of the penis so idk if this is normal, it was placed normal but i thought it had to conver the entire penis but there was this gap at the end so i wanna know if this is normal?...also i forgot all about menstrual cycle and fertile days etc...i just finished my period the day before we had sex, does that mean i have a fewer chance on getting pregnant or a higher one ?
marinemom 24 is correct in her answer to you. The gap at the end of the condom is a reservoir for the semen to collect in. If it was not there the force of the ejaculation could cause the condom to rupture; so always make sure your partner does not try to force his penis to the very end of the condom and the reservoir is hanging free.
The only other advice I would offer is that now that you are sexually active, you consider some for of oral contraceptive for yourself. While condom usage is a must until you form a long term monogamous relationship, and both you and your partner have been tested for HIV. Oral contraception for you is a better form of birth control as the condom is less than 90% effective as a birth control method. Th oral contraceptives are as much as 99% effective.
I am 16, Im not new to having my period, I'm a virgin, and I haven't had my period in a while, maybe going on 5-6 weeks. What is going on?? I'm 99.9% positive that I'm not pregnant because the only thing that ever happened to me was a boy tried to finger me, I didn't let him, but he ended up touching me for one second! I highly doubt that did anything but still Some one please help me out here!!!
The answer from DearAbby92 is absolutely perfect. I couldn't have said it better.
At 16 years of age you have absolute medial confidentiality; meaning you can have a private consultation with your doctors, without a parent listing or observing. The doctor by law cannot reveal any of your conversation or results of the examination without your expressed written permission.
I tell you this so you can consult with your doctor about using birth control to regulate your period, should you want too. Even though you are a virgin and may have no intention of becoming sexually active; you may want to use birth control pills for one of there other benefits. This is the ability to regulate a woman's period. This is something you may wish to discuss in private with your doctor.
Remember when talking to your doctor(s) there is not much if anything they have not heard before; so there is nothing for you to be embarrassed about. If you have questions or concerns you doctor is your best source of information Always be truthful with your doctor(s) in answer their questions so that they may make a proper diagnoses. This is your body; you need to supply all the symptoms to the of what is bothering you. You have the right to know what is going on with your body and be involved in selection of any treatment. This is the law and has been since you turned 13.
if you bleed while intercourse does that mean u have hiv
No bleeding during intercourse is not an indication of HIV.
If you have recently lost your virginity it could mean your hymen has not completely torn free and is slowly being torn during each following intercourse. Regardless of the reason you need to see your gynecologist to find out why. If as I suspect your hymen is still partially attached your doctor will complete the removal with a simple office procedure.
what are the chances of getting pregnant just using a condom? how would i be able to lessen the possibilities? ive never had sex, i have taken sex ed though, twice. also, is there a way of obtaining birth control without a parental guardian? are there different types for different people? do i need a prescription? thanks
If you are over 13 years of age the HIPPA Laws, Health Information Privacy & Portability Act, affords you total medical confidentiality. This means anything you say to your doctor is confidential and cannot be told to your parents or anyone else without written permission from you. You can ask your doctor for a prescription for birth control without parental permission; your doctor can if he/she wishes refuse to do so if they have medical reasons for doing so but not because you do not have parental permission.
Properly applied a condom is between 80% to 90% effective as a contraceptive.
yes my husband has had boils always.. but these appear to be just surfacing after a lifetime of developing under the skin.. and now they are huge and some round as a quarter. very painful and not very nice to look at. please tell me what you think this may be or what to ask when seeing a doctor and please point me in the right direction of the approprate type of dr.
thanks very much
psmobl.
I'm am hesitant to even make an attempt to say what the boils on your husbands face are; for most likely I would be wrong. For that matter we on this site are not allowed to make diagnoses or offer medical advice.
As to what Doctors to see or what approach to take to see what these boils are; there are two approaches you can take. Depending on your medical insurance coverage you may have to start by seeing your family doctor and being referred to a specialist. If you have a PPO plan of insurance you can take the second route and go straight to the specialist.
From what I am reading here I would say the first specialist to seek help from would be a Dermatologist as they deal with disorders of the skin. What ever blood work or tests that need to be run can and will be ordered by the Dermatologist. Once the results are in either the Dermatologist will treat your Husband or refer you to the proper specialist based on the test results.
Last year arround this time I started cutting myself. I thought it was because I had problems in my life but then I realized I have a pretty good life. But then I had to transfer schools because mine closed and I feel really depressed here but I don't want to leave my friends. So now I'm back to cutting myself and only a couple of my friends know and they want me to stop but I feel like I can't. Now one of them wants to tell an adult about this but I'm afraid to. I don't know what to do but I really do want to stop I just feel I don't have the strength to. What should I do?
I'm old enough to be your grandfather and I hope you will take my advice.
What is happening to you, by cutting yourself is a sign of depression. There are many different types of depression and teenage depression is a very common form. Society today puts a lot of stress on teenagers. Stress is a major cause of depression. Life can be good or even great and still you can suffer from depression.
Depression is only a mental illness as it is general caused by 2 chemicals in the brain not being produced in sufficient quantities to help a person deal with whatever is causing the depression. Because it is a function of the brain the best doctor to deal with the medical side of this is a psychiatrist. This does not mean you are crazy. You are not. A psychiatrist is a medical doctor who will write a prescription for drugs that will replace the missing chemicals, much like insulin does for diabetics. The doctor will then send you to a psychologist for talk therapy to find out just what the stressors are that is causing the depression and help you deal with it.
Okay, that is the most common causes and treatment of depression. Now to get help the best way is to tell your parents. Will they get upset, probably, but there is a difference between getting upset and being mad at you. They will be upset because you are hurting and hurting yourself and they didn't see it. Afraid to tell your parents: You could tell a teacher, guidance counselor or school principal . They are all trained to handle these situations and to get you help. Other ways to ask for help; pick up the phone and dial 911. If you pass a fire station on the way to or from school, go in and tell them you need help. Fire Stations across the country are safe havens for children. The firefighters will care for you and see that you are gotten the proper help. Last you can go to any hospital emergency room and ask for help. The doctors and nurse's there will see that help is given you.
You have taken the first and biggest step by recognizing you have a problem. The next step is easier, finding someone to help you. Help is out there you just have to ask for it.
Ok so i just received a letter in the mail today about my new doctor and it's a girl. She going to do a check up on my private parts. I have had sex a lot with my boyfriend and I just did it today. How do I tell my doctor that I didn't have sex and could they found out if I had it? I would like them not to tell my parents or else I'll be in big trouble. I'm really scared about this. What can i do? someone help me!!!!!
Let me start by saying I'm old enough to be your grandfather. I tell you this so you will understand that the information I am about to supply is the truth and not a street rumor.
First: You can relax, if you are over 13 years of age you by law have medical confidentiality. This means you have a right to meet with your doctor(s) in private without parental supervision or observation. By law your doctor(s) cannot reveal any of your medical conditions to anyone, including parents, without your expressed written permission; this is the LAW. The Law is called HIPPA, Health Information Privacy and Portability Act. Under this law anyone in the medical profession, Doctors, Nurses, Paramedics, EMTs and all who work for them can be fined and sent to jail for 10 years for releasing medical information without permission.
Second: You should never lie to your doctor(s). A doctor cannot help you if they do not have a clear and concise medical history. The only care your doctor may have about you being sexually active is whether you are practicing safe sex. This is appropriate care for any doctor to offer any patient male or female. If you are not using condoms it would be a good idea not to have sex the night before seeing the doctor so she can have a clear view of your internal workings.
If you are not using condoms you should be no matter how well you know your partner and his sexual history. It is the best way to avoid STDs and the AIDs virus.
So now that you know there is nothing to be afraid of you can tell the doctor the truth and you can ask mom to wait in the waiting room while you see the doctor. If you don't want to tell mom yourself you can ask the nurse to ask the doctor to ask your mom to wait in the waiting room. They will both understand and be tactful in how they ask your mom to wait outside. Bring a note with you that you can slip to the nurse if need be.
I need to go swimming but i'm on my period. My teacher needs a note if I dont go. I know it's natural but Isont care. I dont want him or my parents to know. If your gonna tell me its nothing to be embarrased about dont bother. I wont listen. Its urgent. ANY EXCUSE WILL DO! If you answer with any excuse i will be most appreciative. THANKYOU!
I think I answered this one before and judging from your current writing it was not what you were looking for.
The only thing I can think of to offer as advice is to go to the health office and ask the nurse to give you an excuse.
At some point you are going to have to give someone a reason for why you cannot go swimming this week. Your reason is a totally natural bodily function. I do not understand in this day and age why you are so embarrassed. If you were to send me a private message as to why you are embarrassed about this maybe I could be more helpful. Remember I am old enough to be your grandfather. In my many years I have seen and done many things including being a Firefighter first responder with EMS training.
Okay so i called my friend to see if she was home and her mom picked up, she said her daughter [ my friend ] wasn't home yet she said her daughter would come home any time soon. And she asked me if i wanted to come over and wait. so i came over and my friends mom started talking to me and asked me if i snuck to my friends house 2 weeks ago at mid nite, i did acctually but i didnt awnser my friends mom. She told me she heard alot of moaning, but the truth is we were listening to the sounds of people doing it as a joke Lol :p so her mom got a little closer to me PS: her mom is 28. and is very pretty (:
so she comes on top of me and starts making out with me and then takes me up stairs to her bed room.
she tells me my daughter is away at her dad's house she wont be back for another 4 weeks ;)
and she stripped me down and started fucking me; i liked it .... then after that she always invited me over till her daughter came back home then.. i didnt wanna do this! but idk its tempting and it made me really horny... help am i a lez!?!? i dont wantt to be i mean i
Just from readying what you wrote I would say you were over powered by a Bi-women. As to being a lesbian probably not.
As someone how is old enough to be your grandfather my thoughts on teenage sexuality are this: A teenager between the ages of 13 and 17, the primary puberty years, is usually seeking to identify their sexuality. It is not unusual to try and enjoy same sex sexual indulgence's.
There are two reasons for this. First it is an easier and safer way to relieve the sexual tension brought on by puberty. Second:Parents think nothing of same sex children being together behind closed doors. This way you have relative comfort to explore your own sexuality even if it is with a member of the same sex. This does not make you Bi, a Lesbian or Gay. You are doing what comes naturally, you are exploring.
What has happened to you should not have happened with someone of her age, that is where the confusion has come in. My advice is to stay away from this women and explore your sexuality with people your own age.
This women was wrong to have seduced you. She has caused you great harm in doing so, as well as violating the law. The harm she has done is she has taken from you the chance to explore your sexuality with people your own age as it should be. The law she broke is one of a sexual predator as she had sex with a minor; this is sexual molestation.
As to should you tell your parents? Think about this. She seduced you, has she seduced any of your friends other friends or even your friend? If the answer is; it is possible then I suggest you tell your parents and let them handle the situation.
I have this very young teacher and lately He keeps on winking and smiling at me, or just hugs me randomly when there is no one around.he also keeps on talking to me even whenever other students are around and he kind of ignores the others
im getting afraid of him and my friends start laughing whenever he does something.
does this mean he likes me and he is into me?
how can i find out? and how can i tell him to stop?
i still go to school btw.
I agree with the other written below; but his is not something you should try to handle yourself. This is a problem that requires parental intervention, so you need to tell your parents about this.
What your teacher is doing is wrong and very possibly even criminal. The winking and smiling can be explained away as a form of encouragement. The hugging is where the problem comes in and what may raise this to a criminal act.
An occasional hug in front of their students and teachers for outstanding performance can also be explained as encouragement. To do so when no one is around or in dark corners is a problem.
Most importantly you must understand that you have nothing to be ashamed of and you are not to blame yourself for anything that has happened. You are a victim, possibly of someone with child molester tendencies.
Tell your parents and let them handle this. The teacher should be immediately suspended from teaching and the Police should be notified fr them to investigate and do a background check on this man.
So, here's an odd one. I'm currently engaged to a fantastic woman. She's everything that I've always wanted, and we're madly in love. We dated for a long time several years ago, and then broke up. Now, 2 years later, we've gotten back together. Here's the problem:
We're fairly adventurous people sexually. We've had a sort of threesome (oral on me only), and we've always talked about doing more than that. Then, just after we broke up the first time, I had a threesome (MFM) with a couple of friends. Now, when we got back together, I was shocked to learn that she'd had a threesome (MFF) with the same girl! And our old flatmate. Should be cool, right? I've done it, she's done it, we've done it... Not exactly.
The problem is that she still lives with this girl and they're the best of friends. And she's still friends with this guy. And the girl is dating another one of my girlfriend's exes! I know I shouldn't, but I can't help but feel uncomfortable around... well... everyone! It's gotten so bad that I don't even want to go over to her house. And to top it all off, we're expats, so our social circle is relatively small.
So, the question is - how do you come to terms with your girlfriend's sexual past when it's right in front of your face? How can I lie in her bed at night and listen to her ex-girlfriend and her ex-boyfriend having sex? It just seems like too much to bear sometimes.
Should I be comfortable with this? Am I just weak? What can I do to get over this and be cool with everyone?
Like it or not we all have a past be it sexual or otherwise. You two are now engaged to be married and will be starting or are starting to make new history together. What you do is put the past behind you.
One of my closest friend from childhood married a girl from are circle of friends. I'm fairly confident that he is well aware that he knows that while she and I were dating I took her virginity. We were still in High School at the time and while we were talking of a future together life kind of got in the way. Her know husband and he went of to College, I joined the military. Four years later when I came home they were married and had a child.
The first thing he did when he heard I was home was to invite me over. I spent many an evening in their home and it was just like old time. He had no reason to worry about me; she married him, there was no Dear John to me as I never asked he to wait for me. I was not jealous of him either, I was happy for both of them. A year later I married my wife.
Life eventually took us in different directions although we stay in touch through emails. History can only be a problem if you let it be. If it is a problem now what is it going to be like when you get married.
As I see it is you she sleeps with; t is she makes love with now and has committed to do so in the future. Forget about the past or it will eat you alive.
Building Maintenance employee (my son-in-law) started 9-1-10
Did not sign a contract. Filled out a W4
Received a check bi-weekly with taxes taken out but nothing shown on check stub because they said their program did not provide that. (small company) but they did provide an excel spreadsheet showing check # - company name and all itemized deductions for each check. On 2-9-11 employer gave a 1099 (which was hand written in pencil with the wrong spelling of first name and made out for $7,900.00) and said he will probably have to cut a check for the money that was deducted because they did not send it in to Federal, FICA, State, etc. On 2-10-11 employer said he wants a meeting in the a.m. because he is either going to fire my son-in-law or the office clerk (those are the only employees) because they don't get along. They do get along. If he gets fired and does not receive the check for the taxes the employer took out - should he not claim the money on the 1099 because most likely the employer wont send it in? I think he's a tax evader.
You are assuming something that at the time of your writing this has not happened.
I'm not 100% sure of the legality of what your son in-laws employer has done. He has deducted Federal, State and other required taxes. By so doing the issuance of a 1099 is wrong. An employer who with holds taxes must report this and pay theses taxes on a quarterly bases to the appropriate agencies. A 1099 is a miscellaneous disbursement of funds for which no taxes are with held.
I would say regardless of how the employer showed your son in-law that taxes were with held; your son in-law has proof that the employer withheld the taxes.
My advice is that regardless of the outcome of the meeting your son in-law needs to contact both the IRS and the Michigan Department of Taxation to report this. Even if the employer gives him a check for what he has withheld it will not be enough to cover the taxes due as your son-in law will as the employers portion of the taxes (matching funds) will be missing. Your son in-law will be looked at as self-employed and the earnings are taxed at a higher rate. This I know as a fact.
I'm a junior in high school. And I'm worried. I don't know what college I wanna go to, and I'm unsure about my major. I currently have a 3.8-3.9 GPA.
I was thinking about architecture or interior design, but I'm afraid that I'm going to walk into a class at a college and feel completely lost or dumb. I don't know much about architecture, but it's honestly one of the few careers that seem to be of any real interest to me. I've taken Drawing 1 and 2 at my high school, and photography as well. I plan on taking a Physics and Design class my senior year, and another photography class. But I'm still scared and unsure. If I choose to major in Architecture, what do I have to go into college knowing about it? What skills will I need to have? What classes should I have taken to help me?
If anyone majors in this or knows about it, anything you tell me about it will be helpful.
My niece took Architectural design in college. The College she attended the undergraduate school course was not a certified course so she was required to attend their graduate school for her Masters Degree.
In the college my niece attended the course was part of the school of Engineering. She spent many days and nights in the lab working on her drawings and project buildings both in her undergraduate and graduate schools.
One of the course I know you will need to have or will need to make up is advanced math course such as AP Calculus and Physics.
There are not t many schools that offer certified Architectural courses. If this is what you want I would suggest you start by talking with your guidance counselor. Find out what schools offer the coursed you want. Then contact those schools for more information such as what are the prerequisite for placement in these classes. You might also ask for the first year syllabus from selected courses.
When you have all the information sit down with mom and dad to review and make a selection of 3 colleges. Next you arrange to visit those colleges. These three colleges are the ones you are going to apply to. You will probably apply to more but these are the primary schools you are hoping for acceptance. Then apply for early acceptance.
Good luck.