about

Hi I'm Dee. I'm 23 and married. I've worked in health care as well as office settings but am now a home-maker. I'm knowledgeable in a variety of subjects but don't mind doing a little research if asked about something I don't know about. Most of my friends come to me for advice. I read several advice columns and would like to help you also.

I'm not judgemental. Your life is yours to live it as you choose. I believe asking for advice is good, but ultimately the choice is yours. You WILL NOT find a hurtful or smartass answer here.

If you have a question that you would like to keep private, you can email me and I'll get back to you as soon as possible.

advice

I know people will get their makeup professionally done for prom or whatever. But, I wanted to get mine done before I take my senior portraits, what is the cheapest it would cost? Who/where would I call the schedule an appointment?

Call a local Mary Kay salesperson for a consultation. A lot of times they'll do your makeup for free to advertise their product and let you see how their products work.

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ok heres the situation..my parents said i can only get a cat if i can find a place for the litter box so my puppy wont get into it when nobodys home. i cant think of anyplace to put it, any suggestions?

Put the litter box and the cat in a room with lots of windows and shut the door to keep the dog out. Another option is to keep the litter box in the bathroom but put up a baby gate to block the puppy from getting in. The cat will still be able to jump over the fence to get to the litter box.

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about 3or4 days ago i started dating one of my best guy friends. we sort of had some sort of crush/flirt thing going on for a while. but starting an actual relationship with him never crossed my mind. until my cousin (who i recently found out was friends with him) started talking to him about "asking me out" and when he was going to and all that jazz. so when we hung out again. he asked me. it hasnt hit me until now that.. i dont want a relationship. but hurting him would be the last thing on my mind. hes been hurt before.. and is pretty sensative. so i dont know what to do. i know i should give it a chance.. but i dont want to wait to long. and start lying to myself about when im feeling. i dont know what im feeling.
anyone andive on what i could do?

It wouldn't be fair to him to string him along thinking he will have a relationship with you right now. Just tell him that while you do like him and care about him, you're just not ready to be in a relationship yet. Since it seems to me that your cousin talked him into asking you in the first place, he'll probably agree and want to take things slow himself.

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I'm re-doing my entire room & I've been looking for new beddings but I can't find anything. I want to try to find a bedding that has some red in it because red is my favorite color. I tried looking at JcPenneys, Target, Dillards, Sears, & Bed Bath & Beyond. If anyone knows any other sites, let me know. I'll rate high. Thanks =]

http://www.elegantlinenspc.com/bed-linen.htm
http://www.startextiles.com/
http://www.bedsheet.com/
http://www.roomstogo.com/
http://www.pier1.com/

You can also try WalMart, Kmart, Kohl's, Dollar General, or Family Dollar.

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Ok so my best guy friends are freshman and im a sophmore and all i can say is that i love them more then life itself. i would seriously do anything for them. well they just became freshman so they will be moving up in my youth group at church,and they will be with me more.my friend adrienne(who is also a freshman)and i are kinda like leaders in our grade. and my guys friends(the freshman) are known to sometimes talk during service and they just pretty much dont care about it. my friend adrienne and i have gotten in trouble many times because of them talkin but we love them so much we just defend them. so we are trying to decide whether or not we need to still sit with them in church , because we are scared that they might bring us down. please let me emphasize how much i love this guys the thought of telling them that i wont sit with them brings almost brings me to tears. im just really stumped i need help please

Since you and your friend are leaders, I see no reason why one or both of you can't tell the guys that they need to be quieter during church. Let them know you find it difficult to concentrate when they're talking and tell them that if it doesn't change, as much as you hate to, you'll have to move to another pew during church.

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This is going to be the strangest question ever. My grandmother and my mother both carried a Bible as part of their bouquet for their weddings. I want to do the same. There are 4 possible Bibles that would fit the bill.
#1-Grandmother's Bible-She isn't around, and she wouldn't let my mom carry it. It's a faded ivory.

#2-Mom's Bible-She carried it, but she is now divorced. So maybe superstitiously, I don't really want to carry it. I will already be wearing her veil. It is white.

#3-The Bible I was given when I was Baptized. It's blue, and a little stained due to a fire. I don't think anyone will see the stained.

#4-The Bible I was given at or near birth with my name written on it. It is a very light pink.

All of these Bibles mean something to me. They aren't huge, so weight shouldn't be an issue. One day I want the blue one, and one day I want grandmother's Bible. What's your opinion?

I think the blue Bible would probably be best. The fact that the Bible survived the fire would be, in my eyes, a symbol that your marriage can survive anything.

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what are some tips to prevent odor during my period?

Making sure to shower daily and wash the area good will help keep down the odor. There are also scented or odor-resistant pads and tampons that you can use.

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I want opinions on this one. I'm 17 (almost 18)/f, my boyfriend's 19. We're both going into college as freshman, but we're going into different colleges. I heard there are dances at my school and I'm assuming there will be some at his.
My thing is, I really wouldn't feel comfortable going with anyone but him, but he'll be living like 45 minutes away from me and I have no car and therefore no way to pick him up.
He does have a car, but I doubt he'd want to drive 45 minutes to get me, run back, and then run me back later. (Though he did promise he'd drive over and see me every other week as long as college didn't kill him workwise)
Opinionwise - should I find out the dance date(s) and try to work it out so I can drag him, or do I just go alone?
Also, do I tell him if there are dances I want him to take me (mostly because I honestly want to meet his friends...and besides, he's a good dancer)? Would that seem too much like I'm trying to keep tabs on him? I trust him, and he knows that.
What do you guys think?

I think finding out when the dances are and letting him know ahead of time is a good idea. You can sit down and choose a couple that you'd really like him to come to or you'd like to go to at his school.

Another option is to go to the dance with a group of girls. When I was in college, I was four hours away from my fiance so he wasn't able to come to school dances. A group of girls, all of us engaged or dating someone that couldn't come, would just go to the dances as a group.

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My course at university only allows me to take a certain number of credits (this is the same for all students, irrespective of how they do academically). There is this course I'd really like to do, but I've already got all the credits I'm allowed to take and there's nothing I can really drop. I like this course enough that I'm thinking of doing it despite the fact that I wouldn't be allowed to take the exam at the end and wouldn't get any creditpoints from it which would go towards my final graduating grade. Is this a stupid idea? I really can't see there being issues with me managing my time even with the additional load, as my current work load is really reasonable. On the other hand, I feel like I'd be wasting time doing an elective I'd get no credit for academically. It's by no means an easy course and it's not something that will be useful to me, it's just something I'm interested in. Is it worth taking on more just because it's interesting?

Some colleges will allow you to audit a class. This basically means you sit in on the class but don't get credit for it. Talk to your academic advisor and see if this is an option for you. If it won't put a strain on your other classes, I see no reason why you shouldn't take it if it's something you're interested in.

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When should you start visiting colleges and looking at them?

Generally your junior year of high school is a good time to start, although you can start earlier. For now, concentrate on getting information from different colleges, the majors they offer, etc so you can narrow down your list of colleges to visit.

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SO SORRY THIS IS LONG

Ok so i just turned 13 last month, im the youngest person in my whole grade ! and my friends are turin 14 soon .. and they are all have their periods and have regular size boobs .. but they got their in like 6th or 7th grade , and im going into 8th ! you know that checkup thing when your like 12 , well they said i wouldnt get my period till im about a freshmen .. like 2 years and this was about like going into 6th grade. I have pubic hair under my armpits and on my vagina .. and i sometimes ill have white stuff on my underwear and this has been like this for about 3 months .. and to let you know im really small and i have no boobs ATALL im flatchested.

Some girls simply develop later than others. Just be patient. It seems to me that you're starting to have some signs but the rest could be a little ways off. Don't be in such a hurry. While having your period and boobs can make you feel more grown-up, they're not always fun. Since you have no boobs right now, you don't have to wonder if a guy is just dating you because of your boobs. Also you don't have to deal with the cramps, bleeding, etc in a period.

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Hi. Iam 15 and i have a lump on my boob. I just noticed it today.. I'm pretty sure it just appeared today. I don't know what it could be. I mean, girls my age don't usually get breast cancer. I know it's possible, but i guess it could also be beningn. My mom told me that she had a benign lump about 12 years ago. Hm, maybe it's that? I haven't told her about it, though.
Please help, what do you think it is? What should i do?
thanks

Since you do have a history of breast lumps, it would be best to have it checked out by a doctor just to be sure. Most of the time, it is benign and some even go away on their own, but it's best to be safe.

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OK... i babysit 2 boys... 5 and 8 years old.. they are crazy!!!! and when i tell them sumthing, they just ignore me and keep on doing whatever they r doing... how do i get these kids to listen to me!?!?
*ignored babysitter*

I would suggest talking to the parents to see how they get the kids to behave. Personally, I've found time-out works fairly well. Just make them sit in a corner with no toys and no talking for one minute for each year of age.

Kids tend to have one track minds so you need to repeat stuff quite often with them. Making it clear exactly what you want them to do will help. If they don't understand what you're trying to tell them, they'll usually just ignore it.

I would not suggest raising your voice to the kids since you want them to respect you, not be scared of you. Just sit them down and spell out the rules and consequences to them clearly so they'll understand. Then, if they do misbehave, enforce the consequences. Once they realize you're serious and no amount of whining will change your mind, they'll settle down.

Another option is to bring a piece of paper with their names written on it and a sheet of the little foil stars with you when you babysit. Tell them everytime they don't listen to you or they do something bad, they'll get a star on the paper. At the end of the night, whoever has the LEAST stars gets a reward.

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I got a lot of my friends mad at me for a stupid reason (long story) and now i only have....hm....2 friends.I think. I'm really bored because I have nothing to do. I don't really care that they don't like me but it bothers me that they think I did something really "bad" when I dissagree. This is a stupid question....I need help on what I should do about my "friends" and what I could do in my spare time by myself.

Thanks!!

I would suggest talking to your friends about why they're upset with you. If it's something you've done, apologize for it and tell them that you don't want to let a stupid mistake on your part ruin a great friendship. A true friend, while they won't always agree with you, will respect your right to have your own opinion and beliefs and not say it's "bad".

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oh of my best guy friends likes me, and he has for a while. at first i didnt like him but now im starting to. but im afraid if we go out, then break up,that i'll lose one of my best friends. but im also afraid if i dont tell him i'll regret it. so my question is shold i tell him i like him or not?


plus i dont know if i really like him, or if im just really flattered that he likes me

I think you need to be sure whether you really like him or not first before you step into a relationship. Once you've figured out whether your feelings toward him are true, then let him know. Take things slow. You already have a great friendship with this guy. Let him know up-front that you don't want anything to jeopardize your friendship. I'm sure he'll understand and feel the same way.

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Alright well Just a fiew minutes ago this guy asked meh out. And a fiew weeks ago I really wanted to go out with him till I did stuff with him ( i sorta reegret it ) and I felt like he used meh. But he was pestering meh and all this stuff. and he was like we can hang out Ill bring you to movies and take you out to eat and all that stuff.. So I finaly just said yes. But I have a feeling he is still using me and I dont want that. I want a real relationship. Im suposed to hang out with him tomorrow but i dont know what to do cause i know he is gona ask me to do stuff and he is gona be like well we are going out now. so he will use that as an excuse. And I dont want to do stuff cause I know it will be because he is using me and doesnt really like me! What do I do. HOw do I know if he really likes me at all or if its ALL just for sexual stuff?
Love maddie
Ps im 14/f

Just tell him you're not ready for sexual things up-front. If he sticks around even without the sex, then he likes you. If he moves on or tries to convince you to change your mind, then he's probably just trying to get him a piece.

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i start school soon & the doctor says i can use herbal stuff to help me get to sleep earlier than im us eto...have any of you used it and tel me if its worked? thanks

There are several herbal remedies to help you get sleep. Jasmine and lavendar are generally believed to help relax you. Try simply spraying your pillow with one of these scents. I believe one of the plug-in air fresheners also has a formula in these scents.

Drinking chamomile tea about an hour before bed may also help you sleep. I've also found that taking Valerian helps me relax so I can sleep without leaving me feeling groggy in the mornings.

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I really love to sing and my friends say I'm good. I don't think I am all that good though and I want to know some good ways to get better without taking voice lessons because I don't have a lot of money. My goal isn't to be a proffesional singer but I just want to be a source of entertainment to my friends because singing is a huge part of my life. Please answer I'll rate 5's

Try joining your school chorus or church choir. It's a great way to get voice training free as well as get used to being on stage.

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I just crashed my uncle's truck into this stupid stone wall, it got dented and the headlight is cracked. I don't know how to tell him, or my own parents. It's a really old truck, but that doesn't mean I can go breaking it. I'm really scared, I don't want to be punished for it. It was an accident after all. I know if it were my car, my parents would be more understanding but I know they're going to flip, atleast if my uncle doesn't murder me. How should I tell him what happened?

The best thing to do is be up-front about it with your uncle. Let him know that you accidentally wrecked his truck but you'll help him with the repairs. Dents can be gotten out fairly easy most of the time and the headlight is cheap to replace. Showing him that you're willing to take responsibility for what you've done and willing to help fix it will help keep him from getting angry.

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I'm doing Community Service at my church helping out for Vaction Bible School and I'm the teacher of 4-year-olds. I need some ideas on what kid of things to do with them. There are 5 boys and ever so often a girl.

Four year olds generally have a short attention span and are very active. You could try watching the Veggie Tales series. I know they use these videos at my church for that age group.

Songs where they can move their hands go over good. "This Little Light of Mine" has hand movements the kids will enjoy.

Coloring pages with Bible themes is also an idea. You can find them at the site below. Just print them out and let the kids go with crayons.
http://www.dltk-bible.com/coloring.htm.

There is also a sunday school lesson plan you can work from at this site.
http://www.dltk-bible.com/guides/index.htm

Try hiding a stuffed sheep somewhere in the room and let the kids try to find it. Once they do, remind them that God is always looking for lost sheep too.

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