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Going out but not sure
Alright well Just a fiew minutes ago this guy asked meh out. And a fiew weeks ago I really wanted to go out with him till I did stuff with him ( i sorta reegret it ) and I felt like he used meh. But he was pestering meh and all this stuff. and he was like we can hang out Ill bring you to movies and take you out to eat and all that stuff.. So I finaly just said yes. But I have a feeling he is still using me and I dont want that. I want a real relationship. Im suposed to hang out with him tomorrow but i dont know what to do cause i know he is gona ask me to do stuff and he is gona be like well we are going out now. so he will use that as an excuse. And I dont want to do stuff cause I know it will be because he is using me and doesnt really like me! What do I do. HOw do I know if he really likes me at all or if its ALL just for sexual stuff?
Love maddie
Ps im 14/f
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You dont really know for sure if he just wants sexual stuff. but if you really dont feel comfortable doing things with him, dont just do it because hes pestering you, do it because you really want too. and by thhe sounds of things you seem like you dont. so if i were you i would tell him "I dont feel comfortable going out with you, or doing things with you, and I dont like being used". You have to be straight forward and not let people walk all over you sweetie.
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wow ok well it doesnt even seem like you like him at all.it sounds like the only reason you said yes wuz because he kept bothering you which isnt a reason to go out with someone. so i think you should tell him that you just wanna be friends or maybe you guys can fwb(friends with bennefits)if that would make him more happy.hope i helped XoXo
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wow... 14, eh? this doesnt seem like a good situation for you to have gotten yourself into. If i knew you personally i'd actually be very proud of you for realizing the slight danger he is to you tho. I cant totally say he IS using you, but heck if you are noticing he MAY be... then there is a 99percent chance he IS using you. i actually think you are in danger, if not physically, but mentally and emotionally too.
what i mean is that if you get out of this relationship too late, for the rest of ure life you may not be able to trust any of your future boyfriends... dead serious here. i mean, you are only 14, rite? well, face it, you are so young that you have the rest of your life ahead of you.. the rest of your dating life, too. if you walk away from this guy after he used you to the extent that this situation may grow to... you will be scared the rest of your life...
i dont like thinking another 14yearold is gettin used... i dont want you to take this too lightly, because if danger IS there.. its better to be safe than sorry.. rite?
if i were you... i woudl probably bring it up to him that he acts like he uses you... then depending on how he reacts to that.. you may wann abreak it off... for your safety really...
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I apologize for any harshness percieved:
Don't mess around with a guy you're not going out with! That's the stupidest thing you can do, I'm telling you now! You're giving him some of the benefits of his being your boyfriend, without the responsibility. (I understand that it can go two ways, but you said you want a real relationship..)
Go out with him, and refuse to do anything with him for a week, or more (if the relationship lasts that long)... he might say something about it, but if he doesn't dump you, it means he probably has some real feelings for you. But if he keeps pestering you about it, dump him. Don't do anything you feel uncomfortable with.
You can tell that they're not using you when you don't jump into anything with them. Be a guy's friend first! Make sure they know your personality before they know your body.
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if you have any doubts he's using you, go with them. you shouldnt feel this way. dont give in, because sex is a huge thing and you dont wanna regret it. talk to him. stay strong!
-hope this helped
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i agree with the above. i mean tell him you arent ready,and if he says ok ....then THATS GREAT . but otherwise dump the man whore
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You tell him you are not ready for sex. If he keeps going out with you and doesn't pressure you after that...he likes you.
If he breaks up with you or still doesn't keep his hands to himself...hes using you. :)
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Tell him you don't want to be used. Have the heart to actually, face him and tell him face to face that you do not want to start anything with him without having a real relationship. Go for it and tell him. If he doesn't listen then he isn't good enough for you! Goodluck and hope my advice works. If he doesn't want a real one, believe me there are more fishies out there in the sea. Much luck to you!
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Just tell him that you want to get to know him better & try to get to know more about him before you do the sexual stuff because you aren't ready for all of that yet. If he gets upset that you aren't ready, then he is most likely using you. I hope that isn't the case and I hope everything works out! If you need anything else just leave it in the inbox.
x33 ;; Always,
ADViCEx4xY0U =]
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Just tell him you're not ready for sexual things up-front. If he sticks around even without the sex, then he likes you. If he moves on or tries to convince you to change your mind, then he's probably just trying to get him a piece.
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