I'm closing my account after being on this site for longer than I can remember right now.
I would like to say thank you to all the columnists that I've met through this site, may your hearts of gold continue to shine through this site.
My reason is simple: I no longer feel I have a use for it anymore. I once was a person who couldn't help other people because of certain difficult situations in my past, but all that has now changed. This site allowed me to be who I really was and for that I'm so grateful for that. It played a very important role in my life and I'll never forget it!
The questions which I answered allowed me to reflect on my life and where it was going, and gave me the opportunity to really appreciate the life that I have, which I'm now living with open arms.
I wish you well for the future,
Triquetra....signing off for the last time.
Member Since: November 24, 2007
Answers: 577
Last Update: December 1, 2010
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I'm sixteen-female
I'm so lonely lately, I honestly dont know how to put myself out there, I dont know how to meet guys. I dont know what to do. There is a guy I like, but I dont know if he even likes me, we dont even know each other formally. I went into where he works, and we had a mini conversation that included a lot of smiles. But really I cant tell from that. I plan on going back to that store, just to see if I can talk to him, but I'll be "buying" something, so I can talk to him.
Anyways, the point is,
I dont know how to tell if a guy likes you,
I dont even know if that guy I like up there has a girlfriend. I'm sick of being by myself. (link)
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Surely, there must be some people in your school whom you feel comfortable talking too. If not, just sit at somebodies table and interact with the conversation which they're having, who knows, it could be on a subject which could interest you. As for your guy, do exactly the same with him, just a little bit more 'interactive' and what i mean by this is to find out some things about him and tell him somethings about you so you get to know each other better.
When you talk to people, you'll find that they won't bite off your head and laugh at you. They could welcome you to sit at the table and talk with them. That really is the best way to make friends.
Good luck with the future
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Hi,
So I like this guy. While I know that it is impossible to make someone like you, what are some tips to flirt and such?
Thanks. (link)
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Approach him and act friendly, but not too friendly, otherwise it would seem as if you were flirting. Say 'hi' and that sort of thing and ask some questions, but don't make it seem like an interogation.
A good sign would be if he asked you the same question because that would mean that he's interested in you as a friend and then you can begin a conversation, tell him your hobbies (and ask him what is his and see whether you can relate to him or not).
I hope this helps
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ok im 15.f. i cry sometimes just randomly. like if one tiny bad thing happens that wouldnt normally make me cry, it brings up a lot of other things in my mind that make me just want to burst out with tears. its not that i have a bad life or anything i have a fabulous life. lately ive been stressed a lot with school and friends and cheerleading, but it doesnt seem like enough stress to make me cry. idk its really weird, and im not exactly sure how to explain what im trying to ask..but any advice on how to help with this? or maybe ideas why or something? thanks i appreciate any advice (link)
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Stress can do many strange things to us which we're not aware of, and can affect the way we behave. Take breaks from your work and enjoy yourself in those breaks, let your body unwind and relax. Listen to music or watch a film, something which will help you relax.
I hope this helps
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alright so this guy i kinda like(adam) me and him were talking about stuff and this kid that is obsessed with me(jason) happens to be adams best friend and and i promised adam i wouldnt tell anyone what we were talking about, and jason called me and like tricked me into telling him waht we were talking about, jason told me that adam said he didnt like me and he was a man whore and just wanted sex and so i got pissed and told him what we were talking about but the stuff jason said isnt true.. and now adam is pissed off at me and wont talk to me and i dont know what to do because i really like him....
what can i say to him? or what should i do? (link)
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You should go and apologise to him. Tell him that you were angry at what Jason was talking about and that you didn't want it to be the truth because you love him. How do i know? Because you defended yourself and Adam which shows you've got very strong feelings for him.
Good luck with the Future,
triquetra
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Hey,
I've been in a girls school all my life and am now in Uni and I find myself very 'left out' even when I'm in a big group of friends (boys and girls) hanging out. I noticed that this happens because I mostly have nothing much to say and that scares the hell out of me. It makes me feel so stupid at times. With girls, especially, those I know and can relate to, I dont have trouble, am usually the clown of the group but I've got nothing to say to guys at all.
And best of all, I've this long crush that has become more than a crush now and when he comes around I go completely speechless. And he's a quirt type too, so that doesn't help at all, as I've to be the one who initiates the conversation. So, basically when we meet by chance, we say hi...say a few sentences and then it's a 'who runs off first challenge'. Please help.
What can I talk about? I know I'm already in Uni and this sounds very childish but that's the sad truth. =) HELP! (link)
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There is a good book out called 'The Fine Art Of Small Talk' by Debra Fine and it has useful hints as how to start a conversation in any situation.
I hope this helps.
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my best friend has changed a lot since we started high school well more about a year ago when she started going out with this kid who i dont like but whatever, my other best friend plays softball and is always at practice or hanging out with her team so that kinda leaves me with one other person dont get me wrong i love my friends but i want to find other friends, branch out so i know i will always have some where to go on weekends, but since im in high school most people are already in groups (my school isnt very catty like typical high schoools, were all get along for the most part) i just dont know how to break into the groups without people talking about it saying (oh look shes trying to be friends with them) im not like loserish or anything either (link)
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There's nothing wrong with 'breaking the mold', you may feel foolish, but what you're doing is something quite brave. Ignore what people say because they just want to be with the people that they want to be with, but you are different and unique at the same time. You want to be with different people whom you're never usually with and that's something.
Go over and sit with other people at lunch, talk to them and ask them what their different hobbies and what they do in their past time. Simple things like that can help you.
I hope this helps.
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uh, to begin -- i dated this guy, Jason, from 8th grade to sophomore year, but then we broke up. However, throughout that whole time, i was best friends with a guy, Chad. He was always there for me, and i could always talk to him. However, going into junior year [single, that is] chad and i went to the homecoming dance together, and from there he told me how he has had feelings for me since 8th grade. The first thought that came into my head was that i did not want to wreck our friendship. Sometime in December though, i started to get feelings for him. We were very good together, but we never officially dated because i thought that we were ever broke up, we would never be friends. Later in April, Jason broke up with his girlfriend, and wanted to give "us" a try again. I gave in, and obviously Chad and i ended our fling. Now almost 8 months later, i am still dating Jason, and Chad has a girlfriend. and i still have feelings for Chad, but Jason treats me so good. But uh, im just so frustrated because Chad has a girlfriend now and i am so jealous. Chad and i already discussed how we both felt towards eachother, but he got frustrated with me that i didnt do anything with my feelings towards him, and thinks Jason is wrong for me. It's my senior year, and college is just around the corner.. What do you think i should do? Should i give Chad a chance? I really just need advice please =D (link)
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Give Chad the chance to show you his true feelings towards you and then you can decide about Jason later and see how you feel about him. It's quite obvious that Chad really loves you and wants to be more that 'just a friend' to you. Jason i'm not so sure about but the indicator to me is that he still has feelings for you due to the fact that he broke up with his last girlfriend to be with you again.
But ultimatly, it's you who should decide whom you want to be with. Spend some time with Jason and Chad and then think about whom you think more about and think about whom makes you the happiest, because nothing is more important than you being happy in your relationship.
Good luck with the future!!!
P.S Thank you very much for being the first person to write directly to my inbox. I really appreciate it. Once again, good luck!!
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ok so about three weeks ago i met this guy through a mutual friend,last friday we went out ( a group of 4 for us) my friend her boyfriend and this guy friend.. you kinda could say it was a double date sort of a thing... we went to a club so it was hard to keep a decent conversation cause of the music and all.. so we got speakin( watever we could hear of eachother) he told me he liked me and i felt that he genualy did seem very interesed in me. i didnt want to take things to the next level and kept holding back... as in i didnt wanna makeout with him the first time we went out and give a bad impression.. but somehow i regret it and feel that he might have thought that i wasnt that interesed or something
anyway ill get to the point me and my friend left the club and i recieved a msn from him saying that apart from being really preety that he thought i was a very nice girl and that he would like to get to know me a bit better. thats the only messgae i have recieved from him since last week(friday) and im a bit confused to why he hasnt called me back or anything yet? i mean if a guy says that, then he probably would right?
so i dont know if i should hold out and wait for him to call me or if i should go ahead and see if he is goin out tonight... although i really dont wanna look desperate... . but then i think well if he really was interesed then he would have called or texted me by now to meet :(
open to all opinions on the situation
thank you for takin the time to read it :d (link)
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If he's contacted you, it's best to write back to him because it will give him the deffinite impression that you want to start a realtionship. Not writing back could be telling him that you're not that interested in him and that he should move onto somebody else.
Call him back and tell him that you're sorry that you've not contacted him recently and that you'd really like to meet him again. After that, keep in contact with him regularly so to build his and your confidence so that you can continue the relationship.
Good luck with your future
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i have always been questioning whether the guy i like likes me back... but now i might think he actually likes me. for example, the other day another guy made me cry, so i just casually told the guy i like about the situation when he asked me how my day was going, well he ended up getting really mad and he went up to the guy and told him off... and he kept telling me he was sorry that the guy said those things to me and that if he ever said anything mean to me again to tell him... and he has randomely been texting me late at night asking me what's up, just out of the blue? lol. he also told me about his "girl problems" and he was tellng me about this one girl he liked, but he wouldn't tell me who, which is weird because he tells me everything else... and i said that she was stupid for not liking him and when i said that he hurry and said "yeah but i'm done with her now!" and i think it's also hard for me to see if he likes me because i am not showing him that i like him very well, even though i think i am. anyways, i guess my question is do you think he likes me?/ how can i show that i like him/ and what can i do to get things moving faster, or do you think if he likes me enough i should wait for him to come to me?
thank you! :) (link)
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You shouldn't try and rush a relationship or 'get things moving faster'. That could lead you to doing something you might regret later. Let things take its course and you'll see results.
To show him you like him, you should ask him out. If you like him and he likes you then you should be about ready to date. Show more affection towards him like cuddling up to him or hugging him, something which makes you comfortable along with him.
I hope this helps.
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Hi, I live in Toronto and I AM soo desperate for a job. I have a lot of retail experience but my job is not giving me enough hours. I am currently applying to bank jobs because i have experince but no luck yet. Do you know of any good sites (besites monstre and eluta) I think it would cool to work in a reatil customer service building but do not know how to apply. Can you help with any ideas of where I can apply to PLEASE. (link)
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You seem to be a lot of work experiance in two different areas. Pick one which you enjoyed the most and then follow up on it. Go to the website below and see whether it can help you:
http://working.canada.com/toronto/index.html
I hope this helps.
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Me and my boyfriend have a good past together.
well, he moved and now he said it feels like we're not together.
it doesn't feel the same like it use to, since he's so busy now.
how do i make this work?
i can't lose him, i can't.
i love this guy so much..and it hurts to hear that, and i just hafe to try to fix this.
help me please.. (link)
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You need to speak to him and tell him how much you love him and that it hurts you to hear that he feels as if the relationship isn't working. Surgest that you meeet up with him regularly, but if he's far away from you, try and see if there are weekends or holidays in which you can spend your time together.
Distance shouldn't affect your relationship, it only strengthens it and proves that you really love each other. This is only one of the many tests which life will throw at us all and you need to show that you can get through this, together.
I hope this helps.
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I'm applying to a private high school this year for the 08-09 school year, and when I read the application form, I found this question: Please tell us why you want to attend Bishop ______ High School. I don't understand. I want to go because it's not as expensive as other private schools I checked out, and is way better than our 2-star public high school, but I assume that that is not quite appropriate to enter on the form. Any help please? (link)
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YOu need to talk about positive things such as:
1. I want to get the job i deserve.
2. To have a good education.
3. To meet new people and make friends.
4. To try out a different atmosphere and surroundings than the one i'm used to.
5. Because it makes me feel welcomed.
You get the pont.
Hope this helps
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so i really like this guy and he really likes me. and when i talk to guys or basically just like mention a guy he doesnt know, he will get jealous. and if i talk to someone he doesnt normally talk to, like on AIM, he starts talking to them too. that part makes me a little mad, but whatever. but lately, ive been looking on his facebook and myspace and there's this girl .... thats definately flirting with him. and in his AIM profile, she is in it. but he flirts with so many girls and i dont know if he realizes it, but it seems like they like him because of the way they flirt, and he flirts back. and this girl was moved from not even on his myspace top friends, to wayyyy up on his top friends. and this one comment she sent him on myspace was "i lovee you too" which means he said i love you first. and its making me really upset because i dont want to lose him, or for him to do things with her, like kiss her or something. (link)
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This could be a case of comeback. He coul be thinking "Well, if she's talking to these guys, then i'll talk to some other girls who she doesn't know. Then she'll feel what it's like to be cheated on". He can be just taking a situation and twisting it around to make it look bad.
If this is the case, go up to him and tell him about the situation from your point of veiw. If it isn't, then surgest this 'twisting' business and explain to him that it's upsetting you seeing girls writing back "I lovee you too" and explain that you still love him, but you also need to have some other guy friends apart from him to talk, but he's in a special place in your heart where he will always remain.
I hope this helps you out,
triquetra
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ok so i really fell hard for this guy and he liked me too till this other girl came around.
we have some history so i thought he wouldnt go for her.
but he did.
now hes going out with her.
they started going out today.
how do i win him back with out making a fool of myself?
this girl is ten times prettier then me.
but ive known him way longer.
shes known him for maybe a week or two.
ive known him for almost a year.
we were great friends then we told eachother that we liked eachother.
i fell for him.
i told him i fell for him and that i love him and hes asked how i knew i loved him and its just something a girl knows.
but i dont know how to win him back cuz him mom doesnt like me at all.
thats the reason he wouldnt go out with me in the first place.
but i need to know how to win him back.
HELPPPP!!!
before its too lateee.
15/F (link)
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Remind him about what your relationship meant to you. He cannot just dumb you because some other girl is prettier, that's just not fair and mean. You've had this realtionship going for a year, right? So why just stop it there for somebody else?
If i were in your shoes, i'd be down right angry and ask him as to why he's going out with somebody else. Love cannot be explained, replicated or copied and surely he must know that. To explain how you know you love him is cruel because it is something which cannot be explained, you just know.
Ask him to think about what he's doing because not only has he put you in an upsetting position, but he's also broken something which was special between the two of you.
Tell him this. Good luck with the future
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I have major feelings for a close friend I've had for about a little less than a year. We are very close but theres one problem - we've never spent any real time together. We met bc his brother goes to my school and my friend USED to like him [shes now dating my ex-boyfriend]. What are ways that I can bring the subject of going out somewhere together up? (link)
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I would go for the slow approach. I ask him how he feels for you and if he's on the same 'emotion level' as you are, then ask him out. Ask him where he'd like to go and if you agree with it, then it's a date.
Good luck with the future.
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Okay so e and my friend Heather are really close, and my other really close friend Mark likes her. But heather has a boyfriend, Jon. And so mark was like "can we have a three way converstation, but heather cant know im there"...so i was like "sure" but me and Mark like to prank eachother, and he said i was chicken to get him back. So, were all on the phone, haether doesnt know mark is there, and she sez some really mean things about him. So i immidiatley said i had to go. Then called her back and explained he was on the other line. She started laughing and we decided to tell him the whole thing was simply a prank to get him back for what he did last time (u dont wanna know). So now hes not speaking to either of us, btu its like when he pranks us its okay, but when we prank him....its like a sin! WHAT DO WE DO!! (link)
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You should really think about what you say, before you say it. When somebosy says something about someone without knowing they're there, then those feelings are coming from within and he might've picked up on that. He heard what Heather said about him, that hurt him. But for you to say that it was a prank is something even worse. Because not only have you really hurt his feelings, you've also damaged the realtionship between you two. You've got to understand that when he pranks you, it's for fun, but when he hears horrible things about him and you say it's a prank, that's really hurtful to everyone.
So, now i've done with the tricky bit, here's what you should do. Go to him and apologise, tell him that you didn't know that Heather was going to say that. Tell him that you didn't mean for it to be called a prank and you only were trying to soften it down.
Tell him all of this and a few other things to help you regain his friendship and trust.
Good luck in the future
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I want to go to university in the states, I live in europe. I found a school and it seemed perfect for me. It was my 1st choice of colleges! I got all exited and dove right in the application process. Now I have all the papers and i can send it...however, I'm not sure anymore. My friend gave me this website, www.studentsreview.com and there students give their honest opinions on their college or university. So I checked my school out that I was appliying for and people said it sucked! It was a shock, it seemed like such a great school. There where a few possitive reviews but the majority was negative... Should i still apply or should i take the reviews to consideration....???!?!? (link)
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There's nothing worse than going to a school which you won't be happy at. Some of my old school friends fell into that trap and they never got out, they wanted to go because they liked the sport there. But when i got in touch with them, they said that they hated it and it was the school of their first choice.
I'd really hate to see other people fall into that trap so here's what you should do. Go and visit other universites which are giving you the options that you want, go to ones near to you or far from where you live. Go to them, take your parents and get shown around. Look to see if the university has good standards and reviews, see what kind of grades are getting produced from the university and if they're consistent or improving!
There is nothing better than learning what you want to be in a place which makes you feel welcome, warm and the teaching is of high quality.
Good luck for the future. Make your decision wise.
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I've always wanted to be a doctor since I ws a little girl,at first for..girly reasons but then it got more serious as soon as I grew up.
I got A's in math every year and this year is my first year of high school and of course I'm on Academic Math but ti's been really hard for me and it takes me 2-5 hours to do my hoemwokr every day, not including my other wokr form different classes.
My counciler told me that..maybe I need to do something 'different' because it's nto normal to be doing your homework for 5 hours a day and it's only going to get harder in grade 10 and longer at the rate I'm going.
My dad is for sure nto letting me move down a level to Appplied and I want to go to Applied but yet I dont' want to!
I really want to work in the medical field and my dad says that I HAVE to go to university, not college but university, no excuse. And that means I really need to stay on top of this levle of math! I have a 70% average so far but I know it's going down right now which isn't good.
My dad is thinking of getting me a tutor but I don't want one because Kumon and Sylvin, etc are really expensive for like an hour so I think it's a big riff off if I don't get what I'm doign and they still get paid.
and I can't get peer tutoring from my school because well..I don't know I'm really shy against peope I don't know. it's hard to make friends even though i have a lot and I kind of have all these crazy side affects so i woouldn't be able to focus.
Please help, I'm so depressed about this issue. (link)
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Kumon is something which you shouldn't be worried about. I was doing it a year ago myself, started when i was five - six. It helped me understand algebra, angles etc and yes it was expensive but it was worth every single penny. You don't need to do it at the centre, you can ask for the pack to be sent to your home where you can do it in more comfortabnle surroundings.
An answer book will come with the level (K, L, M etc) and you can mark them at home. If you get stuck on a question, you can refer to the book for help and you can work out the answer by appyling the method given to you.
Once you've finished a pack, another would already be with you so you can't forget what you've learned. But don't forget to send off the summary sheet when you've done so the centre can moniter your progress and see where your weak areas are.
The sheets go up to 200, but don't worry about this, time flies very quickly. They will be repeating so that you can get those equations, calculus etc drummed right into your head and they will stay with you until...well i suppose forever!
I hope this helps!!! Good luck with the Kumon if you decide to take it up!!
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I just recently moved into a new city and I really wanted to apply at a flower shop or pizza place, as a delivery person. Is it even worth my time applying even though I just moved here and don't really know my way around perfectly. Or is that something left for someone that's actually lived here for a few months/years?
I'm sure this is probably common sense, and you're going "duh". But I'm just not sure!
Thanks! :) (link)
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It is best to get to know your surrounding area and see what job offers there are which you'll feel comfortable doing, don't throw yourself into a job just yet. If you want to be a delivery person, it's important that you know you're way around, especially in a city because if you're late with a delivery, then your company could loose money and that wouldn't look so good for you.
Hope this helps.
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okay so i just moved to a new school about a month or so ago.(freshmen) And i really really like this kid named cody. I talk to him sometimes but not as much. how can i get him to notice me and talk to me? and posably like me?
Thanks in advance.
15/f (link)
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You should start out by asking him what his favorite hobbies are, what he does. That sort of thing. It will get him to notice that you're taking an interest in him. Sit with him at the luch tabel and begin to talk to him more and more often and your confidence will grow. Invite him round to your house and just show friendly vibes towards him and make him feel comfortable. Don't make your move until you're abosolutly sure that he likes you and may share similar feelings.
I hope this helps
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