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November 6, 2009

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Hello my name is steven

advice

So, last night I was at a party without my boyfriend. My boyfriend was home sick, actually, and he said I should totally go to the party anyway without him. Well, I ended up giving this really hott guy a blowjob. My friend was totally telling me that my boyfriend was going to dump me because I was giving another guy head. Is giving someone else a blow job cheating? I haven't told my boyfriend because now I'm afraid he's going to get mad and break up with me. I don't want him to dump me. So, what is the definition of cheating in a relationship? Did I cheat? Should I tell him?

Tell your boyfriend that you cheated on him. It doesn't seem like you have a brain but if you have a heart its going to get to you and your gunna tell him anyways. If you have neither someone at the party must have seen and who says they guy that you gave the bj to isn't bragging to his friends about it. Its gunna get from them to him. The sooner you tell him the better off you are on him not getting mad at you and stuff

So me and this guy, mike, were together in June and had a great month, but i went to a party, drank a bit much and kissed another guy, zack. We had ups and downs and he was gonna forgive me but i told him i wanted a break, i didn't tell him why but it was because i fell for zack. Mike ended up breaking up with me a few days later. In Sept sometime me and zack broke up for different reasons but i realized i really was in love with mike. mike and i got back together, but not really officially openly bf/gf, i love him and he loves me, we talk about our future together. i went to another party without mike and i felt like i couldn't dance with guys and i just wanted to flirt. i haven't really been with other guys besides mike and zack i wanna marry mike one day, but right now i just wanna have fun, flirt with guys. and i feel wrong for saying that, i regret cheating on him so much because i never wanted to be that person. what do you think i should do?

I don't know why your saying you love him. When you love someone you don't feel like dancing and flirting with other guys. I know that much. I would say if your having a big urge to do this then break up with him before you hurt him again. But this time its different, your feelings are stronger. So decide if he means more to you then flirting with other guys at parties where they're just looking to hook up. Good luck on your decision

I am a young girl, almost 18 and if you knew me, you would never think that i would be contemplating ending my life...but i am. i feel like i dont have anything or anyone worth staying alive for. to be honest, i dont care if it hurt my family either. i dont give a shit. and maybe thats wrong, but its how i feel. i am scared to grow up, and be out in the world, alone. i dont feel the need to stay here, yet im scared to leave. i think it would be easier to be dead and not have to feel all the fucked emotions i am currently feeling. i feel stupid being on here and talking about this, but i am courious what others have to say. im not looking for someone to say, go see a doctor or that im just sick, but if you have anything else to say, id would be apprciated.

It's hard to believe that you have no dreams, goals, things to look forward to. When your life has just begun. Your 18 now your not always going to have your parents and teachers right there telling you what to do, when to, and how to do it.
. You can go to college
Maybe your not the type to want to go meet new people, but things are going to change there, especially if you get out of the house. Mom and dad aren't going to pick up after you. You are going to do what you want when you want.
. You can date
I don't know about you but not a lot of things can make me as happy as a special someone.
. Learn something new, something you've always wanted to do
For me it was playing the guitar. I love rock music. When i find a new song that i like; i get a tab off the internet and learn how to play and sing it. Did you ever want something like that? Here are some ideas: A instrument, dancing, cooking, a sport, acting.

I don't think your stupid or sick; i just think your noticing things. The world is a big place; but you still have your family there. And even if you didn't life would still go on. Emotions are tough; the bad ones anyways. But i want you to do something. Remember the worst time in your life, or if its what your going through right now remember the second worse time. And then think about what happened after. Eventually things got better maybe even really good right? Right now your not doing so good but things will get better. Your young, im sure you have talents and things you like to do.

I really hope i changed your mind. And if there is anything at all i could do tell me.

what does it mean when your period blood is brown?

If this is happening early in your cycle (a couple of days after your period) then its just old blood with normal discharge. That is why its brown and not red. If this is happening when you should be having your period and you are sexually active; then you should get a pregnancy test done. If not then you have nothing to worry about.

so ive been with this guy for probably like 2 weeks.
but im wondering when we should kiss?
we havent yet, and he would be my first.

any suggestions on what to do?

I don't think you should plan it. Just let it happens when it happens. And if you get nervous since he's your first just relax and you'll be ok. Good luck

17/f

My boyfriend broke up with me and I am having trouble figuring out why. I met Jake when I was lifeguarding a little over a month ago and he hit on me and was like "hey beautiful" and was completely smitten (like really...haha the other guards were teasing him about it) and told the other guards he felt this connection with me, etc. He even asked me to marry him that day. He asked me out and just two weeks later we became boyfriend and girlfriend. He always told me that he could see me being his girlfriend for awhile, would text me everyday, and just was an overall really great boyfriend.

He has had A LOT of girlfriends/hook ups while I have never had a boyfriend before and only kissed two guys before him. We are really different in the sense that I'm really conscious about my grades (i have a 4.0) he barely has a 3.0, he is a "hardcore" kid or whatever and goes to hardcore shows while i'm really "preppy" or whatever. we also go to different schools and live about 20 minutes away from each other.

i brought this up the day he went out, i told him i'm not into drugs and he told me he isn't either anymore, that he used to be a bad kid but he has changed. he told me he still does smoke but only two cigarettes a day, and that i would be his incentive for him to stop. i also brought up the distance and he kept insisting it's not that far away.

everything seemed to be going pretty okay, but we only got to see each other once a week since he is a senior and his parents wanted him to get his gpa up so i could only see him on weekends. what we would basically do is watch a movie/talk/makeout. before we did anything he told me that he liked me a lot and wanted to take things slow. he also told me whenever he was kissing me that i could say "get the fuck off of me jake" and that i didnt even have to kiss him if i didnt want to and that he just liked spending time with me. he would say so many romantic things when we were kissing like "i could do this all day" one day he started to finger me and he asked if it made me uncomfortable and if it did that i could just tell him to stop.

last week i met his sister and best friend. when i asked him what they thought of me he said his sister loved me and that was the very first time his sister had like any of his girlfriends, and he said his best friend said i was "tight". for some weird reason after that day he seemed less interested in me. he didnt text me the day after and when he did text me he was really short with his answers. when i asked if something was wrong he said "no why???" i said "okay nvm" and then he seemed suddenly worried and asked "no. what's up babe?" saturday was our one month and i hung out with him on friday night, he asked me if i wanted to go out to eat and that he wanted to take me out/pay for me but when i got there it didnt seem like he wanted to so i just told him i wasnt that hungry and we just went in his basement and watched a movie/made out. he then asked me since it was like our one month if i wanted to try anything, and i said sure...he could do what he wanted but if it made me uncomfortable i would tell him to stop. he started to go under my shirt/feel my chest and i told him "i'm not ready!" and he seemed disappointed but he stopped. then he unbuttoned my pants and started to finger me on top of my underwear and asked me if i was sure i didn't want him to go under (hes always done it on top of my underwear) and i said i'm sure. then later we were making out and he put my hand on his crotch and i started rubbing it. i asked him if it felt good and he said yeah but just do it a little harder next time. then later he asked me if i wanted him to pull down his pants so i could give him a better handjob but just on top of his boxers so i said okay and i think i did a better job and i told him "i don't know what i'm doing...i havnt done this before" and i asked him if it felt good and he said yeah and i'm pretty sure he was hard too so i could tell.

when we were just cuddling and watching the movie i kept asking him about his sexual experiences and for some reason it seems to have bothered him. i asked him if he remembered his first blowjob...if he has hooked up with a lot of girls...if they were from his school...if they were spontaneous hookups...if it was true that he hooked up with this girl in the guard office closet. before i left he kissed me and i was about to leave and i asked him "you liked everything? like it felt good?" and he was like "yeah! we'll talk about this later though you'll freeze." (it was raining/cold outside)

the next day he broke up with me in a text saying that i didnt seem comfortable with his lifestyle at all...but that i was an amazing girl and that i was gonna make a guy really happy and all of this bs. i was really angry and called him and he kept saying "you didn't seem comfortable about my past...plus we are too far away and only get to see each other once a week (something i reminded him the day he asked me out and he said he didnt care) and said i don't seem comfortable with his drinking (something said i didnt mind unless he drove) and said its hard for him to have a girlfriend because he needs to get his grades up and focus on college. i said i could come over more if he wants and could help him study, etc. but he wasnt even trying to make it work and just seemed set on breaking up with me. i asked if the questions i asked last night had anything to do with him breaking up with me and he said sort of.

so i'm basically asking...why did he break up with me? do guys hate it when girls ask about their past? he was COMPLETELY head over heels for me before...i cannot stress this enough. (his friend/the other gaurds would tell me this and would tell me how cool it was that people could see that we were in a relationship together on facebook) was it possible that his friend didn't like me anymore and was just lying when he said that he thought i was cool? i asked him if there was another girl and he said no...i asked him if he didnt think i was pretty anymore and he kind of scoffed and said that wasn't it at all and that he told me from the start that he thought i was beautiful. was i being too nosy asking all of those questions? or did he break up with me because he thought i gave a bad hand job/thought i was a bad kisser/thought i was too inexperienced? i also asked him if he wanted to be friends with benefits and he said he doesnt do that and kept mentioning "pressure" or something when he was with me...he also says that he felt that we went out so quickly and that he wishes we got to know each other better before we became boyfriend and girlfriend. the breakup seemed random when he seemed into me the night before/we went farther than we have ever gone before. he seemed so set on having a long serious relationship with me. what is the deal?

by the way, saturday he went to a hardcore show or whatever and a girl gave him a blow job im pretty sure. they are talking and im pretty sure going to be hooking up. i feel so hurt that he went from me to this slut.

He broke up with you because he doesn't know what he wants. He thought he could be happy in a serious relationship with a great person; but it didn't last like he thought it would.
And all that stuff about him needing to focus on college, get his grades up, you being too far away from him, and all that other stuff was a lie. Hopefully you figured that out when he went to that party and got a bj from that girl.
"i asked if the questions i asked last night had anything to do with him breaking up with me and he said sort of"
First of all you shouldn't have felt like you didn't have the right to know about his past. I don't see how you didn't ask him about it before even getting into a relationship with him.
People break up when they aren't happy or when the spark starts to fade. Some guys would rather have sex with random girls then have a serious relationship. It makes things simple, feelings aren't hurt, and there's no attachments. When you brought up his past which was a bunch of sex partners and failing relationships; he found what he really wanted. And when you said "i also asked him if he wanted to be friends with benefits and he said he doesn't do that". Having a friend with benefits; well a ex girlfriend with benefits is not going to work. You and him will still have feelings for each other but he will be with other girls which will hurt you. And he doesn't want to deal with that.

You were happy in a serious relationship with a guy pretending to be someone he wasn't. He didn't put much pressure on going further with you, but acted as if you didn't it wouldn't have meant an end to the relationship. If he had said yes to being friends with benefits i know for a fact you wouldn't have been happy. So do what makes you happy, go find a great guy that you can have a serious relationship with.

If you have any questions or updates feel free to send me another question or put them in the feedback

i'm a 19 year old girl in a huge tug of war emotionally. my boyfriend and i are either going to stay together or break up over this. i have been in a relationship for 2 years and during this time i lost a friend over a petty lie. he lied to me about something stupid and now my boyfriend completely distrusts him although i now realize it was a petty lie that i no longer care about and i want to be friends with him again. i have known my friend for 15 years! however, my boyfriend says he cannot allow me to be friends with him again and pretty much said its me or him. should i pick the person that love with all every inch of my heart, or my friend who i've known for 15 years?

Find out why your boyfriend doesn't want you to be friends with the other guy. If you forgave him and it wasnt something really really bad then i think your boyfriend is being insecure. Talk to him, ask him for a reason why. If he's not being insecure then i would choose the person i love. Friends don't last forever

I know brown discharge for a woman usually just means old blood either right before or after her period. But what if it is no where near my period and I'm getting that discharge? I don't think it's a yeast infection because I'm not burning or itching and it does not have an odor. I also know that discharge is just part of being a woman and that its normal...but is brown normal?

Then it means that your ovulating
http://www.pamf.sutterhealth.org/teen/health/femalehealth/discharge.html

f/teen
So my hole family cousins sisters brother aunts uncles etc, all belevie in waiting till marraige and so do i Its hard cause you get tempted but i stick through it.
I know that is what god wants everyone to do and its the right way to do it.

So i was wondering on how you feel about waiting to have sex and doing other things with them?
(besides kissing and makeingout)No fingering bj all that stuff how do you feel about it?

Im waiting till i get married to have sex too. I havent gone as far as oral sex but as long as the relationship has been going good, we love eachother, and can see a future with one another. I think i would go that far

16f New Jersey
Im turning 17 in like 2 months! For the drivers test, specifically parallel parking, when you drive up towards the cone, should the end of the car be lined up with the cone? Or should side view mirror line up with the cone?..heres what I mean:
A.

[]]}
* *
OR
* *

I took the test about a year ago and I remember the other cars bumper lined up with the back seat window. And then you turn it to the certain degree and so on.
Tips just to remember stuff like checking your mirrors every minute. Never go over the speed limit if your scared of going over stay 5 miles under. Always check your blind spots before changing lanes. Use the hand over hand method and use your read view mirror when backing out (they don't like when you look backwards)
That's about it gl on your test

Why do guys always seem to cheat? I just don't understand it. You give them everything they could possibly want and then you find them flirting with other women and junk. What am I doing wrong? It's like nobody can be faithful anymore

Because guys tend to forget whats important to them when they have the opportunity of having sex with another girl. Not all guys cheat, i wouldn't do it and i don't think some of my friends would if not all of them. Your not doing anything wrong, you just haven't found a good guy.

i need some opinions...do you think teenage relationships are pointless? me and my boyfriend are 17 and been together for a year. i'm not the kind of girl and he's not the kind of guy to throw around the "l" word, but we honestly love each other.

he's my other half and i honestly can't remember life before him...we tried breaking up once because we were afraid of getting too attached before college, it didn't work to well since we ended up getting back together....however, this is why i'm worried...

i know its bad to get so attached, especially when college is around the corner...we both don't really know whats happening next year.

so my question is, do teenage relationships actually last? or are they just another thing to get upset about when you have to break up for college :/

I understand where your coming from but i look at it as your going to be upset either way. But if you were to break up sooner then going away for college all you did was take away the chance you gave your relationship. And no i don't think high school relationships are pointless. I know its rare but its possible to marry or spend your life with your high school sweetheart. And even if you don't you still learn from your mistakes and know what to expect in future relationships. My advice is to stay together, its seems like your in a good relationship and i don't think being scared of graduating is a good reason to end it

Advice for shy boyfriends

Ummm to get him to talk to you more and be himself around you? Some guys just need a little time to warm up (Im one of them). Go out on dates, but spend more time somewhere he would feel comfortable. Like if you can hang out at his house then go over there. If he's more talkative in public then go out. Just try to make him comfortable but at the same time pushing him out of his shell (but not to hard). If he doesnt talk much on the phone, talk to him every or every other night on the phone. Sooner or later he'll warm up to you.
If you have any other questions don't hesitate to ask, gl.

me and my friend want to sing lucky for the talent show...its the first song i've ever sang like in front of anyone and im really nervous....are there any good singing tips for this song? he's never heard me sing either but he says i have a good voice...if that makes any sense? :/ we're obviously gonna practice together beforehand...im nervous, even singing in front of him and i want to keep my cool. any advice? thankss :)

I haven't sang in front of a crowd before but i have sang in front of a couple of friends. And i was pretty nervous the first couple of times.
1. You should practice as much as you can together and not just that same song (You don't want your song to get boring to where you don't feel like singing it anymore).
3. Sing in front of your friends and ask them what they think. And tell them to be honest because you want to get better.
2. Warm up your voice before you go on stage.
Thats it good luck at your talent show

my boyfriend is pissing blood and for some reason his parents think i step out of your relationship and cheat, when in fact hes the one who cheats on me.. but anyways hes pissing blood like maybe 5 times a month its been happening since april.. and they think i gave him an std.. ive only slept with 2 people.. him and a virgin and the virgin it was his first time doing everything and i still had him get tested and he was clean.. ive been with my boyfriend 9 months.. so if he had an std and gave it to me would i know by now? i dont have any symptoms i know aids can take years to come up so i mean any other ones? he's had 23 sexual partners and hes 19 and im 17

Well if you don't have any of the symptoms i would say he has a urinary tract infection not a std. I suggest he gets checked out by a doctor
http://menshealth.about.com/cs/lifestyle/a/urinary_tract_2.htm

So my situation is that I kinda don't care anymore...BUT at the same time, unobsessively, on the side, so nobody knows, I kind of a little bit, not really, still do... But not a lot. =)

This boy bothers me. Childish to say but I think it can be true at any age. At 5, 18, or 30 men still bother us.

And he definitely does. If it's intentional I wouldn't know, but why is it that he barely talks to me, or asks to see me, or acts interested...

Yet he INSISTS he is...And wants to kiss me. Well he DID kiss me. But there's more to it. His ego, HUGE! That's probably why. Well I rejected his advances once or twice. But that's normal for a girl to do. And I didn't just flat out reject him either. Just didn't kiss him right away. Big deal!

He still shows interest. Every 3 days...like clockwork. Why? I wish I could tell you.

With people we hang out...I finally kissed him last week at a party at my house. That did nothing to change his mannerism.

And every time we saw each other one on one (twice in total) he wanted to play some game where I ended up in my underwear or kissing him (although I didn't) or seducing him. To be fair one of the "games" was my idea because well...I'm fun...and it involved him embarrassing himself so it was well worth it.

But now, he finally asks to see me again, just us. And he wants to play another dirty game... yippe!

Not worth it for me because I actually want to get somewhere, get to know him...progress. I told him I didn't want to play and he tells me "Its okay if you're not comfortable you don't have to play" I told him (a few hours late) that it wasn't about that....

Now he wont answer for a day because I didn't answer him right away. I know because he's like clockwork. I know when to expect a text and when not to. Very predictable...

So advice? I guess I'd like to know how to move forward in this situation. I would be more forward but he doesn't like that. Likes to call the shots, which hes calling VERY slow.

So I kinda don't care anymore, but still it bothers me so I guess I do...

ADVICE?????

I think you should tell him that you want more of a serious relationship with him. Or your never going to get anywhere. By what your telling me about him it doesn't seem like he wants the same type of relationship that you do. So to get things going tell him what you want. If its to get to know him better or get serious. Gl

OK here is the long and short. I have a CD Burning program called CD Burner XP, I have a CD-RW by Memorex ( I am sure this time that it's CD and not DVD) I have a Dell computer and Some MP3 songs that I downloaded from MP3Panda.com... How do I get them onto the CD where I will be able to play it in my car or in my CD player. Please be detailed. I have tried using Burn Data CD and Burn Audio CD and everytime either my cd get's rejected or it doesn't register that there is a CD...Oh and here are the CD Drives I have on my computer... the one that says DVD and DISC and the other says DVD RW DISC (the latter one is the one that I have beenn using. When I use the other the programs never accept that there is a CD in there. Thank you for the DETAIL! :)

Not all cars can play cd-rw you need to download them into cd-r's. I use itunes to burn cd's, it's fast and simple. Gl and keep it as a audio cd not a data disk

Today I burned some CDs off of a playlist on iTunes. Just as the instructions said (as well as common sense), I went to File --> Burn Disk, and the diskes were burned onto the CDs.

When I put them in my car though, it wouldn't read. As if there was nothing on the CD. And when I put that same CD back into my computer to REBURN, the music WAS THERE. So it went onto the CD but won't play in a normal CD player or radio?

What did I do wrong?

You didn't do anything wrong, I use to have the same problem. Your burning the songs to a cd-rw right? Your cars can't play those cd's (some can). Burn the songs to a cd-r and it should work.

My mom said she went to her doctor and they were concerned about her possibly having osteoporosis because of her age and "other factors." Well, I'm not really sure what osteoporosis actually is and I want to tell my mom more about it, as I'm sure she has questions about it as well.

Isn't osteoporosis bone loss or something like that? Like I said, I'm not entirely sure, and these medical websites make things sound really complicated. Could someone just please explain to me what it is and if my mom should be really concerned about it?

It's not the loss of bones, it's the weakening or thinning of bones. And she shouldn't be worried, her doctor should be able to put her on some medication that will help strenghten her bones and prevent injuries. You can look it up on google or another search engine for more information.

Why are some people so afraid of commitment?

They're scared to be emotionally dependent on another person. The other person could be perfect, but the people that are scared of commitment would rather run away and not take the chance of getting hurt.