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I kissed my gay friend... but I have a boyfriend of three years!
Hey guys. 19/f
Okay so the title is self explanatory. Tonight we were all out for one of my girl friends birthdays.
I have recently started college in September and made a bunch of new friends. One such friend is *Kevin who is gay and who I have become very close with.
Anyway we were all messing about and having a good time getting a bit tipsy etc. Then one of the girls and Kevin kissed joking around. We all said we would kiss him then just for fun because we know he is gay. I joined in not thinking anything of it at the time. The thing is I have a boyfriend!.. I know. I feel like an absolute skank. It was our three year anniversary last weekend and everything. I feel so horrible. All of my friends were trying to reassure me that because he is gay and because we are such good friends it doesn't mean anything and it's not a big deal. It would be like if I kissed one of them..etc. But for me it is a big deal. I've never kissed anyone else in the whole time i've been with my boyfriend. I feel like i've let myself down and him down. What do I do? Do I tell him about this? My friends say I shouldn't because Im causing him unnecessary hurt. I don't want to make excuses for myself or anything but I was having such a good time I completely lost my mind. That's NEVER happened to me. No matter how many guys have hit on me I've never entertained it. Am I over thinking this? Am I being too hard on myself? What would you do? Should I tell him or leave it be? I know he'd be very weird about it. Please help.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Oh for heaven's sakes -- leave it be. Unless you are looking for a reason to break up with your boyfriend. In which case, tell your boyfriend that you kissed Kevin, tell him that Kevin was a *much* better kisser, and suggest that he call Kevin for pointers.
Seriously, though, lots of gals get drunk and make out with their gay guy friends. Have you see this College Humor video?
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
There's a reason that they say "We will marry your girlfriends!" with such confidence.
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Oh don't worry, tell him and I'm sure he will be okay with it, I've always wanted a gay best friend myself ^.^ tell him.
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It's pretty simple; put yourself in his shoes, would you want him to tell you? I think the answer is yes; you really messed up and if your not honest with him your changing your relationship from something based on love and trust to secrets and lies.
If he takes it well I suggest you get rid of your bad habit, it will only cause problems for your relationship.
Gl
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Whether you tell your boyfriend or not is up to you. As far as kissing Kevin on his birthday? That's no big deal and I do not consider that cheating. Gay or not everyone deserves some affection on their birthday. A birthday kiss is just that. A show of affection for a friend on their birthday. It is not the same type of affection you have for your boy friend it is more like the type of affection one would have for a member of their family. Would you be this upset if you gave your brother a birthday kiss of course not.
The type of kiss you gave Kevin may not have been the type of kiss you would have given your brother. Still it was a kiss you would not have given him had it not been his birthday. Your boyfriend should understand this. If he doesn't explain to him you would not be upset if under the same circumstances, his birthday, another girl kissed him. This is not cheating this is just showing someone your affection for him as a friend on their birthday.
I'm 66 rears old and I have a few female, married friends, that my wife and I are close with them and their husbands. Their are several times a year birthdays, anniversaries and certain holidays when hugging and kissing are appropriate. Neither or none of us feel that we have cheated or are lustful of the others. It is just away of showing are affection for one another in a socially appropriate way at appropriate times of the year.
So stop feeling bad you have done nothing wrong. Have you not seen your parents hug and kiss their close friend? If so, if it is okay for them why is it wrong for you?
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